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LDR troubles Anonymous 113199

I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year and a half now. When we first met and started dating, he lived an hour away and planned on going to a college close to mine.

Now that COVID hit, he has stayed at home (3 hours away from my college) and is planning on going to nursing school (not sure where, but most likely not the original school he was going to go to).

I see him once a month and it's been really hard. We barely talk on the phone/facetime because he is always busy and stressed. He never has time to do anything (work, go out, call etc.) because he is too stressed. He doesn't even like nursing, and is only in it because his parents told him to. He likes not seeing me often, and says that we'd probably get bored of each other if we saw each other a lot. But IDK I feel like I need to see him more. And when we do see each other (because I ask him) I have to plan every single activity or else we won't do anything because he doesn't like going out.

I still love him so much and I would hate hurting him, but lowkey I am starting to check out of the relationship. I bring up these concerns and he starts crying and promising to change, but nothing ever really changes. I understand what he is going through– that is not the issue. If it was temporary, it would be fine. The issue is that we probably won't have a "real" relationship until we both graduate in a few years, and I want to go to law school and I doubt he will want to move away with me (his parents want him to stay close by). So yeah IDEK if this was meant to work.

There is this guy at my school and we're friends, and he's always inviting me out and doing things with me. I don't think I like him, I think he just represents everything I wish I had in my relationship and it hurts!!

My parents are telling me to stop wasting my time and break up with him, and I think that might be the solution too but I'm not sure. Sorry for the long post, this was more of a vent post but advice is welcome!

Anonymous 113202

>barely see each other
>you do all the planning when you do see each other
>he chooses his family over you
>uses 'too stressed' as an excuse to spend minimum time with you - if he were really into you, he'd put the time aside and see it as a worthwhile time investment
>promises to change but no results
>looking at other men who do more than your own bf
I think you spelled out all the problems and the only solution is to breakup with him. Once you get doubts and are ready to check-out, the relationship was over a long time ago.

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