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Scared of losing my virginity Anonymous 130217

Does virginity matter?
Virgin anon here. I am the quietest one in my friend group and I've never felt a strong attraction to anyone, recently I've noticed a change in one of my closest friends, she seems more confident and outgoing than usual but without that innocent attitude like before. She told me that she lost her virginity after a party last week, and now frequently invites me to spend the afternoon drinking with her "friends" at her apartment. One of them looks at me weird and has already made some advances (he's kinda cute though) and she's even encouraged me to give him a chance (since he's a virgin too.) The problem is that the thought of something penetrating me is kind of scary, I've always been kind of embarrassed even when I used two fingers once just to know what it felt like, plus I'm afraid the experience will end up changing me somehow, what do I do?
>does having a dick enter you hurt?
>does losing your virginity change you in any way?
>does size matter?

Anonymous 130218

Hook up with another autistic anon

Anonymous 130219

Seems like you don't want to do it, don't push it because of your peers

Anonymous 130221

I keep thinking about it though, but i'm just so unsure that i feel like no matter what i choose, i will just end up regretting it later.

Anonymous 130223

Don't feel pressured into something you don't want to do.
Don't go hooking up with the first cute guy you see because of societal pressure.
You do what you want when you want and no moid is going to make you do otherwise

Anonymous 130226

No it doesn't matter much but what matters is if the moid knows how to eat out. Don't let any peneration happen without anti-conceptives and without being eat out first.

Anonymous 130232

Yes it hurt like a bitch for me.

Anonymous 130234

You sound like you're underage.

Anonymous 130235

Don't go for a random moid just because of peer pressure. Wait until you find a good bf with which you are comfortable.
Also, make sure you aren't used by them, most guys are mongs that just see you as a fleshlight.

Anonymous 130236

I mean a lot of people that are still virgins at this age (assuming early 20s since alcohol is involved, but could be wrong) sound like children spreading rumors on the schoolyard when it comes to sex. Humor her, if not for her sake than for your own.

Anonymous 130237

Does this mean i have to give oral too? I think it would be weird for both of us.
How bad? Is there anything i can do to minimize it?
I'm 20
How good can i get at reading them? I think I'm ok at separating the jerks from everyone else.

Anonymous 130238

I'd say its important because your body is important. I dont think that losing your virginity makes a woman a whore (thats only for male interest) but it matters to men and women - meaning it does have a value, good or bad, high or not, it has one. And Id say you shouldnt throw away something of value for a random man, also because it goes mainly in their interest.

Its fine to be sexual, but going back to being cautious about sexuality and casual hookups would ne great, only that it should be women who do this and in their own interest. Don't let men take profit of your body and sometimes vulnerability. Especially if it can be backlashed at you. Despite the "hook up culture" women still get shamed for their sexuality.
One of my friends was sexually active quite young. She was often hurt by her boyfriends. Psychologically i mean. She always was the one who sacrificed the most for her relationships. And men took and thats it. And after the relationship ? It wont be them who will be shamed. We give and we give and what do we get for letting men take our time, our minds, our body and our exclusivity ? Nothing, we lose.

Having a relationship or having sex with a man is dangerous for a woman and we are forgetting that while women keep being victims because of that.

Anonymous 130239

Also consider that if you ever feel in love with a good and serious man who actually invests in a relationship with you by more than with his money, you might regret it.

I didnt lose my virginity but i did other stuff despite not wanting it - only out of devotion, and I regret it so much. I feel dirty because I feel used. I already felt like that before meeting a good man. It just feels wrong letting people take something from you then go on with their lives with that and with pride while you're left just used.

Anonymous 130240

And without all my annoying points just don't do it if you're not sure and you dont know well this boy. You dont knwo if he might say stuff about you after, trashtalk you, you dont know if he will abuse you, etc.

If you really decide to have sex for some reason at least take the time to know who you want to do it with.

Anonymous 130257

>he might say stuff about you after, trashtalk you
Not the one you were replying to, but that's laughable in this case. He's a virgin, what's he going to say, his hand was better?
I don't disagree with your points that moids can be cruel and abusive, but presumably he's in as compromised/odd of a position as she is. I've heard stories about "practice girlfriend" talk, but at the same time this doesn't seem like he's scoping out prey. Hell, I'm surprised he even made an advance at all given so many of them lack anything resembling a spine. Again just want to say I'm not discrediting what you've said or that your suffering shouldn't be an example for other women.

Anonymous 130276

I won't rehash what has been said earlier, but you sound pretty naive and unexperienced so please take your time and consider carefully what YOU want and why you want it : do you want to feel like your friend who seemed more confident afterwards? Do you want to prove to them or to you that you can do it? These are not valid reasons, in my opinion, to 'lose' your virginity. Even if the first time is way overblown by most people and women are unfairly shamed for it, I have enough friends that regret their first time to tell you that waiting out for someone that care about you and respect you is the better choice.
Now to answer your questions (ntayrt by the way) :
>Does this mean i have to give oral too? I think it would be weird for both of us.
You don't have to do anything. What do you want to do? It's normal to feel unconfortable as it's something you've never done before. If you feel like trying, go ahead, but please don't (and never) force yourself to do anything sexual that you don't want to do. You will get nothing out of it except regrets later on. And yes the first time will probably be weird and awkward but everyone needs to start somewhere.
>How bad? Is there anything i can do to minimize it?
Depends on a lot of factors. Mine was a bit painful but nothing too bad, and it was totally painless after 2-3 times. To minimize it you have to be well lubricated so if you're not wet at all it will be harder so don't be afraid to use lube, spit or whatever. He shouldn't go straight into you, foreplay is important to relax and get into it. Fingering especially will help 'loosen' you up and adjust to the feeling, but then again don't do anything you're not confortable with.

Anonymous 130321

If he’s a virgin, it’ll probably suck anyway for you. Why give a moid pleasure for free?

Anonymous 130325

Thanks! You've given me a lot to think about.
It's not about "giving" anything, it's about seeing if trying something new is worth it.

Anonymous 130332

Don't put too much pressure on yourself to something or not. You can also try dildos, that way you only have to deal with you and not another human. Now to answer your questions

>does having a dick enter you hurt?

Usually yeah, but that's where everyone is different and foreplay/lube are really important.
For me it was a nightmare, it hurted so bad we had to try it 3 times. It was bad.

>does losing your virginity change you in any way?

It did for me, I was less innocent afterward

>does size matter?

Nah, girth and shape does tho. If it's too fat, it's gonna hurt. Same if the angle is weird.

Anonymous 130347

It was one of the most painful thing I have experienced. I didn't bleed too much afterwards but then some days later a period-tier amount of blood came out of nowhere.
Honestly if I were you I would use toys to break my hymen or whatever. Going through this with a random moid who is not your bf wouldn't be fun.

Anonymous 130436

>does having a dick enter you hurt?
For me, slightly at first because I still had my hymen but not really. I still have my hymen actually, its abnormally thick septate hymen that I stretched myself before sex by fingering over a period of years (it only takes maybe a few weeks to stretch out though).
>does losing your virginity change you in any way?
No, not really. Same as I was before, its just progressively become easier for me to talk sbout sex which wasn't easy at first. Only people who having sex will change is retards who think losing your virginity gives you some sort of value and status, so they'll puff their chests and walk around like they're hot shit. Teen behavior tbh
>does size matter?
Only had one dick but I'm gonna say yea. I used to masturbate with the handle of a hairbrush, which was much thinner than my BF's cock, and the thickness felt much better. Idk that lenght matters as much as thickness, but I do like the feeling of him going in deep but my vagina is only maybe 4 inches deep so it matters less than thickmess IMO

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