How do I get a bf Anonymous 52780
guys always say it's so easy for a girl to get intimacy, I just want someone to hold me once a week at night
i have tried so hard online, im deaf btw
I don't know what to say if you got no messages online, it's definitely easier than doing it in person. You could try showing your interest to a guy IRL.
What guys don't understand is that it is easy for girls to get a guy if their standards were just "literally any human with a penis", but it's never like that in the same way /r9k/ retards don't actually want "any girl", even they want a girl they are attracted to.
And mutual attraction is an entirely different story.
Not that I have an actual answer to your question OP, feels bad.
Do you have any siblings that could introduce you to some friends?
>>52780>tried so hard online
Do you mean tinder and bumble, or fishing for bfs on the chans? I know some anons here do this but for the love of god please don’t try to find a bf on r9k.
Finding a bf is so up to chance that I don't think it's fair. Single people should be placed in some sort of database where everybody can see each other and match based on preferences, hobbies, likes, dislikes, etc. I met my bf completely by chance in class and if I had done things even a little bit differently I would have never met this person that I get along with so well and who I have so much in common with. Like if I had picked a different seat I probably would have never met him. Genuinely makes me mad that it's like this. Why hasn't society fixed this.
It really depends on what kind of guy you want. You probably shouldn't do tinder or anything like that, especially considering how their ELO system works.
Personally I find like just 10% of guys to be attractive. The rest are just average or unattractive. And that's not even talking about whether they're retarded coomers or guys just looking to hook up.
There's a Black Mirror episode similar to this called Hang the DJ (Season 4 episode 4).
BURN DOWN THE DISCO
HANG THE BLESSED DJ
BECAUSE THE MUSIC THAT THEY CONSTANTLY PLAY
IT SAYS NOTHING TO ME ABOUT MY LIFE
>>52803>ON THE LEEDS SIDE-STREETS THAT YOU SLIP DOWN>THE PROVINCIAL TOWNS YOU JOG 'ROUND>HANG THE DJ, HANG THE DJ, HANG THE DJ>HANG THE DJ, HANG THE DJ, HANG THE DJ>HANG THE DJ, HANG THE DJ, HANG THE DJ
You're describing online dating
Men and women don't legitimately have that many overlapping preferences and interests in a ground state. Most of the women who pick up male-dominated hobbies (wargaming and miniatures painting as an example) did so because former boyfriends got them into it, rather than endogenous interest, and if that hobby outlives the relationship it's generally a sign that she's still attached to that relationship and might want to recapture it in a subsequent relationship rather than a sign that she suddenly came down with autism. There's a reason men tell other men to pick hobbies based on what will get them laid (music and photography are near-100% certain signs of a wannabe manwhore imo, and that includes homosexual manwhores), and why women accuse women who pick up certain hobbies of just trying to harvest narcissistic supply from male attention.
The database would be useless because almost 90% of male hobbies are already shallow badly-disguised sexual pursuits rather than things they'd still do if their testicles were surgically removed, and the 10% that remain are infantile pursuits that emotionally mature people are able to tolerate only by lowering their expectations on men's social development to that of a bright 4th grader. Male personalities are by and large nothing but sexual strategies writ large.
Photography is filled with middle aged dudes spending their disposable income on Pringles can sized lenses
It's a mid life crisis thing, like a sports car.
They're looking for excuses to stare and to turn their stares into a "conversation" and they think in their reptile brains that this ends with sex.
It's not that men get into sports cars because they think women are gearheads who will enjoy hearing them go on about their repairs and engine tune ups for hours on end.
I think when guys say that they mean guys have way lower standards. There was a thread on reddit awhile back about a video where a girl tries to become the perfect male tinder to show guys don't know how to respond, but fails from the start when she gets just a handful of messages. Then the comments were just filled with anecdotes about the same experience for average guys.
What about butch lesbians interested in cars or engineering? Are they just outliers?
Kind of agree though, save for some guys who get very passionate about literature or whatever. Many of the men I've known who love music or art basically never make art or truly learn an instrument. The last man I'll ever pursue would send me obscure love songs, but was lazy about making his own music and only drew twice a year. Through later research I learned he even ripped a lot of his musical taste from a female friend who actually makes music regularly lmao. Might as well have been romancing her.
A lot of men interested in art (more than women) also just draw horny shit or porn, which I guess is another motivator.
It used to be young adults were put together at social events (often organized through their church) with the understanding they would pair off. Now that doesn't happen anymore. Now when you happen to find someone, all the social and economic incentives are to break up with them. It's made incredibly hard to commit to someone but incredibly easy to break up with them. Relationships as we've understood them are over.
does anybody know who's the girl in the picture?
Did a photographer kill your dog or something? Seriously. Curb your cynicism.
I’m too inadequate to get a bf so I just stalk incels to compensate.
DON'T WORRY, EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE ALRIGHT. I'M SURE YOU CAN FIND A BOYFRIEND WHO WILL LEARN SIGN LANGUAGE.
what kind of stalking do you do? you find any redeemable ones or are they all horrible?
realistically OP, how much of your difficulty in finding a bf comes down to other factors vs just the fact that many men would not want to marry a woman with a very severe disability? I'm not trying to be mean but i'm not going to sugar coat it either: being deaf really is tough, and it changes your lifestyle. any high quality men looking for a long term life partner and wife might not want to start a relationship they cant see ending well. so how much of your difficulty finding a bf do you think is due to that? keep in mind no guy who's nice is going to admit he wont date you because you're deaf, even if that's the truth
Don't be down on yourself, you'll find someone wonderful.
Also do you know any good resources to practice ASL? I took a couple years worth of classes and I'm slowly forgetting stuff. I signed up for a class this year but canceled because of covid
Are the all caps really needed don't be mean :(
There used to be something similar, albeit lower tech: arranged marriages. (a.k.a all marriages before 1800)
Was it based on personal interest though? Even if arranged marriages weren’t always barbaric and cruel to the bride involved as painted by the modern day, a match was still based on financial and political reasons for both families. The two having common hobbies/interests was an afterthought.
Maybe for the elite, but the average folk had the courting process. Anyways, personal compatibility definitely plays a big role in preset-day arranged marriages.
i would like it if arranged marriages were still a thing tbh
Since I have a bf now (who my parents like but wouldn’t have chosen for me) I’d have to disagree but I think arranged marriages are the ultimate way to ensure the creation of an extended family unit that includes grandparents as well as makes sure the birthdate stays at replacement rate.
Relationship for the sake of relationship, huh…
Is there any deaf dating sites you could use?
Wow, he's shit
He watches anime, gross.
Men just want someone to fuck.
Women want someone who cares.
Men have it much easier finding someone they want.
Funny. Guys would say it's the other way around.
If you are white, go for an asian guy. It's laughably easy. With kpop blowing up, they are now status symbols. If you are tall, you will have trouble finding one with an acceptable height, though.
>>56899>with kpop blowing up
Are you from a decade and a half ago or something
>>56899>Asian bfs are now status symbols
The other way round would mean that men have it much easier to find someone who cares. I'd say it's equally difficult for both genders to find that kind of person.
In my experience when men don't commit to a relationship it's because they aren't romantically attracted but aren't above feigning that for sex whereas women that don't care about the relationship are trying to model the faux-maturity where they intentionally maintain emotional distance in ways that they think are just the adult way of handling things but are actually just dumb
Girls. If you're not completely ugly, you can have a BF. Truth of the matter. Your standards and female autism that prevents you from making that a reality is your own bidness.
Swear I’ve seen this person on Omegle
You look like that clown, unironically
>>52809>men dont have hobbies, and if they do its only to get laid, of its not that they're just manchildren
So guys just sit at home bored being npcs or else they're manchildren/pigs?
Go have talk to a male, hun
>>52823>Relationships as we've understood them are over.
And that's a good thing! "Relationships" of the past were all about moids claiming women as property.
>>52780>i have tried so hard
AND GOT SO FAR
BUT IN THE END
IT DOESN'T EVEN MATTER
I HAD TO FALL
TO LOSE IT ALL
BUT IN THE END
IT DOESN'T EVEN MATTER
>>52780>>61742>im deaf btw
Oh shit, OH SHIT!
You're missing out though.
I'm sorry to hear
try getting out and finding hobbies during the day
things you are genuinely interested in.
playing in bands helped me meet people. i didnt learn to play anything til my 20s really. >>52809
Not true at all. If a guy genuinely likes you he isnt going to care if youre deaf or in a wheelchair.
Men are looking for affection and intimate connections too despite how they're painted as constantly.
no that is ciara horan who died of a drug overdose earlier this year
she used to post on r9k
Fucking this, so many of the girls here are incels whose only recent interactions with men are from mgtow cunts and their ilk on 4chan, who are living parodies of that they really stand for, they are just as bad as those moids they disparage, "all men are animals to be used" "torture men" "all men will cheat and are incapable of love" goodness, go get a reasonably well adjusted boyfriend, men aren't mythical monsters, ffs.
you're not gonna find any here. join a social group that doesn't rely on speech. maybe an online essay writing/book club?
It's literally impossible not to get messages online.
First time I signed up for Tinder I put in a fake cartoon profile cause I was too shy to show my face and still got 99+ likes with like a minute, lol.
>>61909>If a guy genuinely likes you he isnt going to care if youre deaf or in a wheelchair.
This is wishful thinking.
I mean, as a girl, I am not going to invest into a guy who is deaf or in a wheelchair.
Like, maybe if he is amazing and totally out of my league except for being deaf/crippled, then I'd consider it, but some random cute guy who happens to be deaf/crippled? Nah, too much work.
>Men are looking for affection and intimate connections too despite how they're painted as constantly.
I agree with this, but for this to work for OP he must be desperate and without much options.
OP should probably just date within the deaf community.