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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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"soy" Anonymous 113726

you know what i never understood?
society's weird fixation with trying to pigeonhole people who actually give a shit about other human beings, people who are capable of demonstrating empathy, as "soy."

why is caring about other people aside from yourself "soy"? why the fuck are other people so obsessed with being assholes for the sake of being "edgy" instead of just not wasting other people's time and resources? ah yes, but a violent, predatory, antisocial (in the actual way, not just being introverted or shy), or emotionally abusive man, is actually the one who is "attractive."

i really do not care about how soy i am. i am actually more sick of people who create conflict for no reason, or those who prey on others, more than i am of people/men that are "soy." why do people act like being an asshole makes you more human? it really fucking doesn't

Anonymous 113727

Hmmm this post reeks of soy.

Anonymous 113728


>it really-
The soy got to her before she could finish

Anonymous 113732

you sound really soy

Anonymous 113733

i dont care. if god is so cruel as to create a world in which social darwinism only rewards the assholes of the world, i dont want to live in such a retarded hell plane anyways
its so easy to warp subjective truth in a way that justifies evil. yet it feels bad to hurt others, and that feeling is more visceral than some warped idea of self preservation, who cares if you're "soy"? it's so dumb

Anonymous 113734

"Soy" is just an insult for moids. It's based on the belief that soy lowers testosterone. It's not relevant to you

Anonymous 113736

except it does
i like sexual dimorphism. its not like i hate masculinity or femininity
but seriously, it feels like the world is constantly gaslighting women into tolerating abusive men. how many movies or shows targeted towards women contain awful, emotionally immature men as the "attractive" male lead? i hate men like that. yet society grooms people into thinking that sort of thing is acceptable, at some point you start to think so yourself, as some awful primed, automated response.
i like kind, gentle men. i dont care if they're soy. i mean yeah, i like masculine men physically, but i hate what being "masculine" or "feminine" has become in terms of who you are as a person.

Anonymous 113738

and not even really "masculine" or "feminine." honestly im starting to hate those terms
sexually dimorphic is better

Anonymous 113739

This feels like a moid post but I’ll reply anyway.

Humanity is inherently evil and will always segregate and put down people who exhibit concern or kindness. That’s all there is to it.

Anonymous 113740

>sexual dimorphism
I don't think it means what you think it means

Anonymous 113741

thats fucking stupid. that is more moid thought than anything. yeah i love wasting my time on being an asshole and exploiting those around me. eventually all of our resources will dry up and ill still be fighting with assholes over the air supply
it just means a difference in how sexes develop. not some ambiguous power-coded social concept coopted by people aiming to abuse it as much as possible

Anonymous 113744

>it just means a difference in how sexes develop
Within this human context, that is to say men are larger and more powerfully built, while women are smaller and of slight build? Because I get the feeling you don't mean, say, that males sprout colorful hair like peacocks

Anonymous 113752

no, not really, but theres nothing wrong with feeling attracted to that. most women are sexually responsive to bear like men who are larger and taller than them. most men are sexually responsive to women who are small. there is nothing wrong with indulging in something that is a natural desire as long as its not used to shame others or force them to conform if they do not like it
anyways that's not really my point. something that once was a natural desire became coopted by people who just want to feel like they dominate over others. i hate "masculine" men and men who are bad people. i like sexual dimorphism, i dont like mean men. i honestly like "soy" men personality wise. men who are kind and gentle, i like when people are not so corrupted and have good intentions. they honestly seem way nicer than emotionally immature men who are brutish and "edgy", like the kind of men that are pushed in modern media, solely to look good in front of other men and feel better than other men. i like being soy, so what? i reject whatever god that creates social darwinistic mechanisms that only rewards aggressive people who are awful and mean and waste other people's time and resources.

Anonymous 113753

okay honestly that wasnt the most authentic or well written post
i dont know how to explain it well but i just like good people. i dont know why people try to groom women into liking people that don't care about anyone besides themselves

Anonymous 113754

You hate masculine men but like big strong men?
>you like good people
Who happened to be distinctly sexually dimorphic based on their gender? It's not a conspiracy that strength is associated with dominance and power, it's just true.

Anonymous 113755

ive met men that are soy ideologically but have a nice bear body + have a cute young face. kino honestly, and same for women. cute young face + petite body + not a self obsessed person
masculinity is a psyop by men who want to control other men

Anonymous 113796

I've dated guys who did something nice for me (once) and then immediately shamed themselves for simping - like we're dating, I'm pretty sure you're supposed to do that? naturally after the honeymoon stuff wore off they went back to treating me like shit though.

i suppose sometimes 'soy' behaviour comes off cringe because it seems inauthentic (see perhaps the men in my dating history), but the idea that being moderately kind to each other is something so unusual it must be fake is absurd (though maybe it isn't, when it comes to men).

Anonymous 114107

i just like good people. i like good men. and being "good" doesn't mean being some die hard feminist or thinking other men are bad. it just means not supporting awful people, or even entertaining their ideas in the first place.
i like men who are kind and gentle and care. i think it's a shame how men are taught that women only like bad men. i like kind men who treat women nicely. i will never get why men think otherwise.

Anonymous 114135

Soy is generally for enthusiasm about things that are seen as vapid, worthless or consumerist. There's a reason the stereotypes of a "soyboy" are the nintendo switch and funko pops.
I haven't really seen people using "soy" just for someone empathetic or kind. If anything, "simp" seems to the worse here, because it's explicitly about people who are kind to women - now it's intended for use in parasocial relationships (e.g. simping for streamers), but then it also gets used for unrequited personal relationships (e.g. trying to seduce a girl who isn't immediately interested) and then that blurs the line with what's supposed to be actual romantic behaviour.

Soy, though, is generally a right-wing meme and mostly used to shame enthusiasm seen as immature and/or consumerist.

Anonymous 114158

random self bump
i think people are scared of outwardly trying to be a good person. to others, to be on the side of people who are willing to reject morality makes you stronger by extension. we instinctively dislike people who we view as being "too moral" or too goody-two-shoes because we see them as being a potential weakness or detriment to the pack.
the sucky part is when you genuinely do care about doing the right thing. it's weird how society always clambers to fling hatred towards those who at least try to be good, while the people that don't really care about it just get away with it. how many times do you see news cycles completely ignoring the oil tycoons and corrupt billionaires that actually run the world while spending hours a day picking on a tech ceo because they used a straw one time? oftentimes, the people that are actually awful are mean and smarter than you.
why does society care so much about supporting bad people?
also, fuck 4chan. i hate that i ever thought of that site as being fun or comfy. if you ever say something that goes against the status quo in a way that actually challenges it, you get permabanned. why did i ever think that site was some "bastion of free speech"

Anonymous 114159

more elaboration because i am just irritated right now
i like good people. i really do. i am afraid of a world in which good people don't get rewarded enough for being good. why would you want your kids to be bad people? to be surrounded by those who you don't fear and can actually trust, that's something rare and beautiful and goddamn why does it seem like people are slowly killing the things that make them human? i like good people. being "soy" is not a bad thing and you can be soy and powerful and in touch with your gender identity, or lack thereof.

Anonymous 114231

Would it be okay for a man to like being a bit edgy or bantery, mean-spirited in good-faith? or would you get mad if he wanted to poke some fun without being too mean or taking things too seriously?

Anonymous 114240

i dont like intentionally mean spirited people. i dont understand the point. otherwise theres nothing "wrong" with that type of personality in a literal sense. but i usually like more lighthearted and silly humor
i am mostly talking about this weird social phenomena in which women are groomed to excuse and intellectualize the behavior of abusive men. its weird and tiring

Anonymous 114241

>if you ever say something that goes against the status quo in a way that actually challenges it, you get permabanned
4chan is a dump but no you absolutely don't. Also, you don't know what the term status quo means.

Anonymous 114242

yeah it is. moderation on that site is entirely subjective. i could do a whole write up about how moderation on 4chin is entirely based on the biases of the mods and admins, which is understandable because its not like i am expecting amazing quality mods on that site. it is mostly this idea that get propagated that somehow moderation and the design of 4chan is more fair or impartial to the average """""anonymous""""" (extremely heavy quotes) than leddit or other social media. honestly i might extend this post, but god i just get peeved when i think about it

Anonymous 114243

if by society you mean a bunch of spergs on twitter sure, but people who don't spend 18 hours a day on the internet don't disparagingly refer to others as soy.

Anonymous 114244

could you please post an example of an opinion that got you banned?

Anonymous 114246

literally go on any board and look at what gets flagged and removed and what doesn't. i cant say the specific example of how i got permabanned because anons on the internet are feking cuckoo, way more than you think, but the double standards as to what the considered bait and not bait is ridiculous. they don't even define what "bait" is, and i end up getting banned for bait even when i post a non troll post, from my perspective. "bait" is almost always what offends a specific audience but not others, thats probably the thing that bothers me the most
open source ai moderation would be cool. something that people can actually understand WHY they get flagged and banned for no reason when you see other people regularly behaving the same way but THEIRS is somehow fine

Anonymous 114247

Understandable. 4moids can be very unhinged and it wouldn't suprise me if they were stalking this thread right now. However, I would like to run little experiment.
If you can come up with some opinions that you think are likely to result in a ban (they don't have to be ones you've posted before) I'd love to go test the waters.
I've never had this issue but I've also made like 3 posts in the last 10 years on that site. Maybe.

Anonymous 114251

Weird fringe group on the cyberwebs*

> why the fuck are other people so obsessed with being assholes for the sake of being "edgy"

They are 14-18 years old. Real Adults are too socialized to admit to a lack of empathy.

Anonymous 114351

bump again
moreover, i like men who add to your life. theres lots of men who just seem to be fueled by kicking down on other people or being mean or hateful. when they're in your life, they're no different.
i like men who are kind and try to be good people. i like men who don't exploit or use others. they add to your life.

Anonymous 114352

also i like men who dont weaponize certain women or groups of people.

Anonymous 114353

and i like kind men who politely leave you alone when you ask them to. i like men who are not constantly trying to talk to you, who don't harass you constantly, or try to get a reaction out of you. i like men who dont emotionally abuse others.

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