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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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Anonymous 14354

Why am I so attracted to men when they display some desire to be beaten sexually? I don't have any interest in hurting anyone and I think it would probably be very offputting, but when a guy, even one I'm not attracted to generally like pics related expresses that they're a masochist they suddenly become hot to me. What's wrong with me? Do I have some kind of problem?

Anonymous 14362

Dont worry I think it's completely normal. I have that too, even if I have no desire to inflict pain to said man or have sex with him, the mere fact of watching him get wrecked is overwhelmingly hot. And I'm not a misandrist or anything.

Anonymous 14364

You're not a freak anon, I'm the same way albeit I only talk about this stuff with trusted girlfriends who share the same tastes.
It's not just the prospect of causing consensual pain that I find attractive in a fantasy way, but the fun in aftercare and lovingly patching someone up so you can do it again and how soothing safe practices could be.
Besides, how hard I want to be depends on my mood and they only exist to be used in that moment, after it's over I can conjure a new cute boy I adore in my head who hasn't been hurt the same way.

Anonymous 14365

You probably just like the idea of a guy being vulnerable. A lot of women with caring/nurturing personalities are like tha

Anonymous 14370

>A lot of women with caring/nurturing personalities get off to masochistic men getting beaten
Hmm. Big if true.

Anonymous 14399

I don't know, I think it's a hot thing to see a man beg to be hit but I have no intention of caring for them afterwards. I feel like it's even more hot when the guy is a little buff and looks like he could take a beating well, but I wouldn't actually want to hit anyone because it would be upsetting to hurt another person. It's so confusing… the bdsm scene is very gross and off-putting to me too

Anonymous 14540

I dunno I just feel bad about feeling this way, like I kind of think these sort of fetishes are usually because of some deep hatred but I could be wrong. It makes me wonder if my feelings towards men are unhealthy in general.

Anonymous 14602

Im just going to pretend I never read this…

Anonymous 14672

Why? Does it bother you?

Anonymous 14688

It's just weird that you don't actually want to hurt them. I like when men act this way but it's because I'm a sadist and want to hurt them (although I also enjoy when they clearly hate being in pain). I also harbor a great deal of bitterness and hatred toward men, so that's a correct analysis for me at least.

Do you not fantasize about beating them at all? Not even guilty fantasies? Because that certainly is strange.

Anonymous 14694

I haven't really thought about it. I guess not? I had an ex who wanted me to cut him once, but he wasn't a masochist he was just very mentally ill. I didn't do it, obviously. I don't really think about beating them, I just think that a guy who wants me to kick him in the face or something seems amazingly hot, but I feel like it's morally bad to hurt anyone. I don't really THINK I'm a sadist, and I'm certainly not a masochist myself (the idea of being submissive or masochistic repulses me) so yeah I dunno what's up with me. It's really weird, I also really like blood but would never cut anyone.

Anonymous 14710


When I was younger (around 12-13) and first started sadistic fantasies/urges I used to feel guilt about it because my mother raised me to be a kind and gentle person. Even when chatting with friends my age (since we were all pervy fuckers), I'd criticize BDSM and say "hurting someone you love is stupid!!1" despite regularly getting off to men in pain/looking at gore. It was a mix of getting off to that shit, feeling as if I betrayed my moral code, then denying outright that I was into sadomasochism at all.

Is it like that for you? Is basically what I meant. Not whether you morally approve of it or would do it in reality, but whether you at least have the urges.

Anonymous 14787

Uhhhh welll I don't really look at porn or anything, I'm not very interested in it, but when I was a horny teen I read some pretty violent fujoshit, I'm not sure why. I went back recently to re-look at some of that stuff and it was too violent and too offputting for me now. I don't really fantasise about hurting people, just people asking to be hurt, and even then not anyone real. Having said that, I've always been a scratcher + biter with boys. I've always thought that was hot. I'm not really a caring person in general, but I'm not uncaring. i usually pretend to be more caring than I am.

Anonymous 16418

i also like the idea of hurting cute guys

Anonymous 16489

A part of it maybe that you want to take charge of something in life o rhave control. But only if you are somewhat submissive in social life.

Anonymous 16525

just ask your crush if you can crush his balls already

he will say yes

Anonymous 16542

everyone knows guys don't exist on the internet sweetie

Anonymous 16856

No, that is not a normal fetish.

Anonymous 16890

I have a friend in the BDSM scene who is into ballbusting. Apparently there's a lot of skill that goes into learning precisely how hard to kick a man in the balls.

Anonymous 17641

My general advice is to not worry about it too much, if it's not reflective of what you would do it's not reflective of who you are. Some of us just have impractical kinks, not in the sense that they're impossible but we simply have no desire to act on them first-person. This is why I mentally separate my porn life from my sex life, I'm a full-on degenerate when it comes to the content I enjoy in porn, but when it comes to engaging in the first person I have more ethical gate-checks before anything gets put into action. Masochists are hot, don't sweat it.

Anonymous 17942


I have the same problem, in addition to that I think bloody noses and bruises on men are hot as well.

Anonymous 17945


fuckk. i HATE this fucking fetish too.

>tfw I tell people I HATE violence yet seeing people beaten and harmed is always hot, especially men, i find it hotter the more pathetic the man is

It makes me feel angry with myself. I still think the HOTTEST thing I have ever seen was this fucking little skinny dweeb at University who fell down the library stairs and broke his nose, his wrist, his glasses etc and was weeping in agony. I ended up 'accidentally' dropping one ofmy textbooks into the pile of blood, I still sniff and masturbate with it even now. fuck. the way he WEPT and his arm was broken. i could have stomped on his broken arm and fucking raped his little body right there.

Anonymous 17946

Anon you got issues. Please don't hurt your bf.

Anonymous 17948

>raped him
How close have you come to "assaulting" (men can't be sexually assaulted) a male? There have been certain males I've had in my life who I've considered tracking down and attacking in their alone time. Or drugging and doing something to, it's one of my greatest fantasies.
On the minor side, I've also been very close to groping a male on the bus. I always wondered what would happen if I did that. Would he yelp, call me out, try and fight me back, or enjoy it? The thing with males is that it's such a wild card, if I was a male into women the outcome would be fear 100% of the time. It's probably this mystery that drives me to actually consider these things in real life.

That said I wouldn't ever act on these just in case he reported it and I got in trouble, or something went wrong. Mostly cowardice on my part. Pls no ban, I'm not inciting violence, just discussing it with a likeminded fucked up individual. NSFW is too slow.

Anonymous 17949

>(men can't be sexually assaulted)

Anonymous 17950

Little boys can, but men are always into it. They say it themselves.
But like I said I would never. It's just an urge.

Anonymous 17951



Anonymous 17952

>"assaulting" (men can't be sexually assaulted)

You win, this trolled me pretty hard. But if you're actually serious you're a twisted shit

Anonymous 17953

>i could have stomped on his broken arm and fucking raped his little body right there.

I feel so bad for laughing at this, it's just so far out there. Do you still love boys? Or do you just have cruel sexual fantasies about them. How do your sadistic desires factor into your relationships and romance?

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