/feels/ - Advice & Venting
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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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Anonymous 19497

Any high earners with loneliness problem here?
I'm earning relatively high, $150k per year which is about 3 times average where I live.
It's very rare that anyone hits on me, and even if they do they disappear after learning more about me.
Are guys just intimidated?

Anonymous 19499

>mfw I only make 40k a year
Nice bragging thread OP, its working.

Anonymous 19500

>>19497
Being a cam whore isn't a respectable profession

Anonymous 19501

My partner made more than that a year and was a lonely and friendless KHV before we met. Having money doesn't automatically mean you will have love, friends and fun all the time unless you try to socialize with idiots and gold diggers. I had no idea they made that amount of money when we started dating, just for the record

Anonymous 19504

I would say the stereotype of men being intimidated/insecure when their partner makes more than they do has some truth to it. That being said how do they get your exact wage number? Do they make a guess when you tell them your profession? You can easily just tell them you make $70k

Anonymous 19506

Think of it from the guy's perspective.
>not suited to caring for small children.
>want sex more than your partner does.
>family is no longer threatened by wild animals.
What would you do in that situation? And don't say you wouldn't care, everyone wants to feel like they're contributing something to the relationship. Guys especially.

Anonymous 19507

>>19497
You're probably ugly, sorry.

Anonymous 19508

>>19506
>men aren't suited for caring for small children
That would be the individual's shortcoming. There are nurturing men out there, just as there are non-nurturing women.
And anon said nothing about her sex drive, perhaps she has a high one and that's what a man can contribute aside from companionship, which is very important! Being nice and supportive shouldn't be hard if he loves her jfc, are men actually incapable of love?

Anyway op, hit on guys you fool. Go full alpha, be both the provider and the instigator.

Anonymous 19509

>>19508
>There are nurturing men out there, just as there are non-nurturing women.
Yes, but they're the minority, that's all.

Anonymous 19510

I never knew stating income level results in bitter replies though telling your income level to someone isn't exactly one of the first things you do (ain't it up there along with discussing kinks and political views in terms of taboo)?

Anonymous 19515

lifeforms.jpg

why would they know your income? are you telling them, or does your job title imply a really high salary? use some of that sweet moolah to get into cool hobbies/activities and meet cool people that you have shit in common with.

Anonymous 19517

>>19497
what do you do for a living?

Anonymous 19518

>>19510
I mean, what do you expect. People will get jealous and interpret it as humblebragging. If OP wants sympathy she should talk to other richfag women wherever they hang out.

Anonymous 19519

v--mq7ydSFM.jpg

Just try to use monies on another people, fam, like make gifts, buy coffe/tea, etc

Saving/spending on yourself monies won't make anyone besides you happier.

And most of it, how does your expected bf knows how much do you earn? You ain't just post this shit in tinder profile info, didn't you?

Anonymous 19520

>>19518
We're all from diffrent countries.

I make for example only ~ $ 41850,65 annually, but it's considered very rich in my second/third world country.

I mean that rich, so with saved monies i bought land and builded myself a brick 350 m^2 house.

Anonymous 19528

>>19515
It’s not hard to guess my income, I work on a technical management position in a very well known company.
Even without much knowledge of the industry people can guess it’s more that 100k.
I don’t want to lie about what I do, potential boyfriend would discover it eventually anyways.

Anonymous 19529

>>19497
I'm wondering where you would be expected to be hit on? If it is co-workers I'd think they would make similar wages. If it's other social circles then yes I can see them thinking you're out of their league with regards to earnings.

I can't think of a non-awkward way to do this but if you could somehow signal "I don't care how much you make" it's possible that could help. But only if they believe that. I think they won't. Is that how you feel? Would you be ok with someone who only made a third of what you do, or less?

Anonymous 19530

>>19497
Can you spot me 200 bucks?

Anonymous 19535

>>19497
>It's very rare that anyone hits on me
Sounds like a looks problem.
>and even if they do they disappear after learning more about me.
Sounds like a personality problem.

Why do you even assume it must be because of how much money you make?

Anonymous 19536

Don’t tell anyone your real earnings, ezclap.

Nobody has to know, it’s your business. I was brought up to think that if people ask how much I earn it’s rude. Just keep it quiet until you’re official or something, and you know the person very well. Money info shouldn’t be given so easily to people. It’ll also stop you from dealing with mooches.

Anonymous 19555

I make twice as much as my partner. Find someone who isn't insecure. Easier said than done though

Anonymous 19560

>>19555

what`s his job?

Anonymous 19565

>>19560
freelance fancy rat trainer

Anonymous 19612

feelslspiritualman…

>>19497
Guys don't care about how much money you make, especially not the way women care. There may be the perception of intimidation because women almost always tend to date upwards instead of downwards. Most men are aware of this and may want to avoid you because of this pattern among women that makes them (for the good of the human race) picky.

They may be disinterested because there's high chance that you would value your job over household maintenance, being a good partner and taking care of the children.

Straight men don't want to date a man, or a women that mimics the role of a man. They want a women that performs the role of a women.

Anonymous 19615

>>19612
Good advice.

Anonymous 19657

>>19612
>They want a women that performs the role of a women.
That made me throw up.

Anonymous 19661

tumblr_npd45lvBPX1…

>>19657
>>They want a women that performs the role of a women.
>That made me throw up.
Well, the good heterosexual ones do.

Just like how you don't actually want any of the insecure, half-gay, aimless manchildren and incels looking for a pseudo-mommy. It's the same thing. A lot of women want men that perform the role of a man and finally fucking stop with their video-games-and-graphic-tees-at-age-twenty-seven meme. It's fun to larp on the internet that you enjoy the current generation saturated with whiny nu-males, but the reality away from the keyboard is a living hell. Look to Japan for some great examples. Suicide rates among women are just going up living among their asocial bugmen buying used panties out of vending machines.

I would rather be a housewife to a kind, capable guy with no bizarre fetishes from too much internet and his shit together and a nice home than some wonderwoman who works 60 hours a week at a .03% elite job while babysitting a nodding, thirty year old leech without a spine. A lot of weirdo men like that end up being the culprit of the murder-suicide that takes you out anyways.


The two other options for happiness are:
a) Marry a closet gay who has "yass queen" on repeat, hope he never brings home some surprise aids from the girl (male) he met online.
b) Become a lesbian. While the abuse rates are through the roof, at least you'll never have to cook being on eternal chinese takeout.

Anonymous 19672

>>19612
My big brother said something like this years ago. He went to a singles event and came back amused and sad. He said,
‘They had us all introduce ourselves and ask about future plans, questions in a script. Every single woman’s self-description was education, job, income, recent travel. Likewise every future plan was more education, promotion, more money, more expensive travel. After that when I asked ‘do you want to marry?’ or ‘do you want children?’ They were puzzled or offended.’
He married a super-religious girl about a year later.
(She’s a stitch and a great SiL).
I think about it a lot

Anonymous 19675

>>19560
He's a journeyman.

Looks like I spoke too soon though. Yesterday he borrowed 2500$ and when I said that would be tough be said I would be fine because of my family. Ughhhhh

Anonymous 19676

PvHjYQY.jpg

>>19661
Imageboards really bring out the crazies among us.

Anonymous 19678

>>19676
enjoy ur discord bf girl

Anonymous 19680

>>19661
Are you seriously equating a female high-earner with a NEET manchild? I'm going to pretend to believe that you are a woman but your options are all wrong.
OP, no, they are not intimidated. They are not approaching you because of something else, your "high-earner" status probably has little to do with it. One common problem with ambitious women is having little social life outside of work, in other words, being boring as hell. It might be something else, but this is usually it.
Also high-earners tend to match with other high-earners, this is a fact. So completely ignore that other anon.

Anonymous 19685

>>19612
>They want a women that performs the role of a women.
You've got it backwards, they want to be men that perform the role of a man. It's why you can be as tomboyish as you like as long as he gets to pay for dates and fix his car.

Anonymous 19686

>>19685
>All men are the same, act the same and have the same exact same preferences for women

Anonymous 19689

>>19686
You know what I mean. It's a generalisation in response to a generalisation. It's the same with women. My boyfriend isn't some hypermasculine macho man but he makes me feel like a woman, and that's what counts.

Anonymous 19692

2C38DE60-C1E4-4731…

>>19685
How else does that happen except when man and woman work together to perform their respective roles, a combination of opposites similar to the ying and yang, to fulfill each other’s wants and needs?

Anonymous 19702

>>19692
When one party doesn't "play their role" but doesn't get in the way of the other feeling like they're playing theirs. There are negative and positive examples here. If you're not interested in being a housewife it can still work as long as you don't prevent your partner from feeling like "a real man" and no amount of waifuing will keep a guy who doesn't feel man enough from feeling inadequate.

Yes, even guys that don't want to take the lead in the relationship need to feel manly.
this is why gfd relationships don't work.

Tall anons, back me up here. It's more important to feeling feminine is more important than your bf being tall, and the two aren't always the same thing.

Anonymous 19709

>>19702
What does it even mean to "feel like a man" though? At least tradanon is clear lol. If I like short men, am not submissive, and am going into a well paid field am I fucked (or not fucked as it were)?
I'm quite strong (for a woman) and am turned off by even average strength guys, so do I have to lie to a weak skelly bf in praising his strength or something? Will I have to want to kms every time we have sex because I need to get tied up and spanked for him to not leave me?
All I expect for being "treated like a woman" is being acknowledged as having a feminine body tbqh…even in femdom the woman is acknowledged as a woman and the man a man. Mistress, not master. And in gfd things like nurturing the guy and him resting on the tiddies is a big thing lel. Those are very gendered.
Also add on I'd appreciate a man for his male body as well yadda yadda. Even have a weird fetish for male body hair, and specifically skinny male bodies since skinny women don't have the same aesthetic.

Anonymous 19723

>>19709
Let me see what I can do for you.
>All I expect for being "treated like a woman" is being acknowledged as having a feminine body tbqh
>turned off by even average strength guys, so do I have to lie to a weak skelly bf in praising his strength or something?
>only like short guys
You kinda see the inconsistency here, right?
Well, if you were dating a guy way stronger than you, what would you want? My bf was ill for a while and got pretty skinny and it was important was not to make him feel weak but also not to lie. Little stuff like not carrying things for him. But he wasn't really happy until he got back in shape, same way you wouldn't like being obese even if your partner didn't care.
>Will I have to want to kms every time we have sex because I need to get tied up and spanked for him to not leave me?
That's not nearly as common as you think, and a lot of the guys that do it only do it because they think it's what women want. Sexually passive/submissive guys aren't rare either. They might not be your level of kinky, but they're not hard to find.
The problem arises when you get crazy with the relationship. In most couples, both partners work, go out, initiate sex, and make decisions. A relationship where only the man does all of that is actually weird as hell, and a relationship where only the woman does is even weirder.
Discussion about "what it means to be a man" is pretty easy to find, certainly more so than what it means to be a woman. Honestly, if you find keeping guys around in is a problem, look at a little bit of that stuff as long as it's not redpill bs. It's not always right, but it helps to build a bit of an intuition for how they feel about some things.

So in conclusion,
>If I like short men, am not submissive, and am going into a well paid field am I fucked (or not fucked as it were)?
You're probably going to have hard time, depending on your expectations. If super kinky sex and paying for things are musts for you, I suggest you invest in a good vibrator. But if you're willing to compromise on those, you'll find a partner eventually.
Short guys usually have a hard time with their masculinity though. Just something you'll have to deal with.

Anonymous 19746

>>19723
>inconsistency
I don't think so, by feminine I don't mean "petite uwu and weak" I am very much not that haha. I meant hips + tiddies (although appreciation for "masc" features like my strength would be nice too), and I present pretty feminine.
>if you were dating a guy way stronger than you
I like short skellies (as in <5'5" 120 lbs and less skelly) so I'm not sure why I'd be in this position. It's also not a matter of "not caring," it literally is my taste. Ideally I'd find someone who is comfy enough with his size (or has no interest in lifting) who I can reassure even if he gets a bit insecure with societal expectations. But I'd obviously let him carry his own things and open his own jars or whatever, unless I can do it more easily in which case it would be illogical not to intervene. And don't men also value being logical?
Obesity is also different from being just not-buff since it puts you at risk for major health issues. And as someone who is a little chunk (but not obese) I would be happy if a guy was as specifically into my body as I am into petit men.
>getting crazy with the relationship
In the past I've fetishized reverse-trad but at this point I've come to terms with the fact that there's going to be some sort of equal exchange with gifts, sex, money, etc. I Won't settle in the bedroom though, at least vanilla-passive (cowgirl, facesitting, basically a pillow prince) is fine but anything more dominant than that and I'm out. Wouldn't expect a dom to change himself either, we'd just break it off nbd.
I will look more into what men think like you mentioned, maybe ask my male friends what they think it means.

Overall it just sounds like men generally care more about judgement than I do? Is that just how masculinty is? Or maybe some women do as well, like ones who won't date shorties because it's "weird." But even socially outcast men like incels and bots are obsessed with image and acceptance I don't know.

Thanks for replying and clarifying, regardless. This reply may come off as pissy but I'm not lol.

Anonymous 19748

>>19746
This is gonna be out of order again, sorry.
>And don't men also value being logical?
Not when their ego is involved.
>But I'd obviously let him carry his own things and open his own jars or whatever, unless I can do it more easily in which case it would be illogical not to intervene.
That's exactly what I was saying not to do. As a general rule, don't do anything for him that he can do himself, even if it'd be easier for you to do it.
>I would be happy if a guy was as specifically into my body as I am into petit men.
I said obese because it's a bodytype that's generally thought of as disgusting. So to make my point clearer, imagine you woke up tomorrow with a man's body, minus the dick, and not an attractive man. Would your partner saying they don't care or even that they prefer that bodytype make it better, or would you still want to have a body you're happy with? Now imagine you could have a body you're happy with, just by going to the gym. Would you seriously refrain just because of your partner's preference?
>I meant hips + tiddies (although appreciation for "masc" features like my strength would be nice too), and I present pretty feminine.
As far as guys are concerned, the only masculine features are height, jawline, and muscles. Everything else is just invisible to them. Why do you think so many guys shave their pubes? It doesn't even occur to them that that might be hot.

>Overall it just sounds like men generally care more about judgement than I do? Is that just how masculinty is?

I don't really know why, but guys seem to pretty much psychologically not have the option to be feminine. Like I'm fine wearing a dress shirt or a dress, but guys can only wear the shirt. I don't think it's so much about judgement as self image. It just so happens that they have a pretty universal view of how they should be.

Anonymous 19750

>>19748
>don't intervene
Okay, alright. Unless he's one of those rare guys with a strongk gal fetish I'll leave it be.
>imagine you woke up tomorrow with a man's body, minus the dick, and not an attractive man
So…like a chubby ftm? I'll be honest, if my partner genuinely was into it then I'd come to terms with it pretty quick. Unless you mean I'd become the tiny man I desire (minus dick) in which case…idk that's getting into autoandrophilia territory, would I even need a bf at that point? I could be my own goddamn bf
I guess I do get your point though. But if it's so simple why aren't all (financially capable) men busting it at the gym getting huge? I see many skellies around, so something must be up there. Even if they're just lazy lol, perhaps laziness backed up by "your ribs make me want to fuck you 24/7" might discourage a guy from gyming.
This applies to your point about height, muscles, and jawline. What's up with 25-and-up weak manlets existing? Also what about some East Asian countries where thinner men are more desirable? I've noticed male k-pop stars get anorexic and shit (although don't follow that so I may be incorrect?).

Anyway, after this conversation mostly what I'm coming away with is that I'm a fucking weirdo dissociated from reality except for wanting a tiny bf. Not what I came for but certainly enlightening.
I'll take most of your advice about respecting "fragile" masculinity unless the individual proves otherwise though.

Anonymous 19754

>>19750
>But if it's so simple why aren't all (financially capable) men busting it at the gym getting huge?
Same reason there's an obesity epidemic. Exercise takes time and discipline, as any /fit/ poster will tell you at length.
>perhaps laziness backed up by "your ribs make me want to fuck you 24/7" might discourage a guy from gyming.
It might, but it also might just remind him that he's small and skinny.
>What's up with 25-and-up weak manlets existing?
Nutrition and genetics I presume.
>I'm a fucking weirdo dissociated from reality except for wanting a tiny bf.
You're not, you just want a type of man that (almost) no men want to be. Your grip on reality is fine.

Anonymous 19781

Well I will say. Anyone with money ITT can just give it to me and I can make you not lonely thanks

Anonymous 19793

>>19680
>Are you seriously equating a female high-earner with a NEET manchild?
Good start.
You have a double digit IQ if your reading comprehension is that low.

Anonymous 19827

>>19781
No way to give you money because if someone aks for contact into someone else may just claim to be you and steal your rightful donation

Anonymous 19834

>>19497
I never had a problem with this. There are enough guys who are understanding, will be proud of you for your achievements and value your ambition. I don't know where you are from but where I live most guys under 50 don't even want a housewife.
Do you go out from time to time? Do you have a bunch of friends? Can you hold a conversation about at least 10 different topics that aren't related to work or imageboards?
What does a guy "get" out of dating you and what are your qualities besides earing a lot of money?

Anonymous 19856

>>19793
>Just like how you don't actually want any of the insecure, half-gay, aimless manchildren and incels looking for a pseudo-mommy. It's the same thing.
Only low IQ brainlets use that pitiful attempt of an insult, btw.

Anonymous 19960

>>19680
Then stay sad, darling. My bf is making the rules and I have a fun time being his girlfriend. :)

You should realize that what the society is trying nowadays is not working, traditional families are way happier than these pseudo partnerships people have nowadays.

Anonymous 19962

0295.jpg

>>19856
>>you have no reading comprehension and misunderstood the post
>no I don't, here's the post I still can't comprehend tho
You have brain damage. Just go back to your faggy clicking retards at tumblr, Becky.
I'm sorry about the porn ban but maybe it'll be good for you, just don't migrate here.

Anonymous 19996

noyou.png

>>19962
>migrate
thank you for the hearty kek. much luck living the "real wamen" life by being poor and useless.



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