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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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Selfcare Anonymous 232

How do you treat yourself?

Anonymous 240

>buying (cheap) stuff from ebay
>or just buying some clothes
>doing my nails
>or makeup
>nice showers
>doing my hair
>playing video games
>reading a book
>trying something new

Anonymous 241

>buying cute things
>using fancy skincare products
>painting my nails
>eat one of those unhealthy microwave meals (I know…)
>play a new game
>take a bath

Anonymous 242

It sounds really dumb but daily I try to aim to at least shower and do my skincare routine in the morning and night. It might seem like something small but if I can at least do that I know I'm preventing myself from feeling any worse than I already do. I also see it as treating myself because I'm taking the time to try and respect my body.

If I'm really treating myself;
> buy new clothes
> buy books or comics
> Go to this nice ramen bar
> sometimes groupon will deliver a nice day out…
> delicious mango pieces

Anonymous 257

With a hot shower and watching a Ghibli movie while eating chocolate icecream. It's my exact routine whenever something bad happens or I need to stop crying.

At how many empty icecream containers does it mean I should get help?

Anonymous 278


That's such a beautiful OP, OP.
For me though it's things like:

>practicing good hygiene

>brushing my teeth
>removing body hair
>maintaining my hair with oils
>drinking fancy (and likely useless) teas
>grooming my feet
>painting my nails
>being vegan? (more of an ethical decision but watevs, it applies)
>exercising regularly

Showers are like, my ultimate though. Not like V U L G A R bathing which involves stewing in a heated vat of your own secretions and filth. Climbing into a steaming shower, sitting down on the floor with your legs crossed or with your knees up to your chest, closing your eyes, feeling the hot water running down your scalp, your back, cascading over your lowered face. No thinking, only existing in that moment, and letting all the bad run off you and swirl away into the drain. That is peace.

Anonymous 356


- Baths with scents/oils, bubbles (especially just falling into the sound of listening to them pop), self-massage, candles, mood-lighting and music, with washcloths to drape over your face, and just really focusing on the feeling of scrubbing clean your body. For me, inexpensive and very worth the effort
- Buying clothes/accessories online or at thrift stores
- Doing whatever exercises and stretches feel good for my body that day to do at the gym (rather than the usual doing cardio even though I often don't feel like doing any) and just taking it really slow. I feel so very relaxed when I take a gym day like that once every week or two

Anonymous 414

>shopping for skincare, makeup or clothes (and spending way too much money)
>taking a warm shower, skincare, hopping on my bed and playing on my 3DS before sleeping (especially if it's a cute and comfy video game like pokémon or ACNL)
>eating out, mainly junk food for budget reasons and
because my friends and I don't like the same food when we decide to go to better restaurants
>ordering takeouts and eating while watching anime or video game streaming on my laptop

>Showers are like, my ultimate though. Not like V U L G A R bathing which involves stewing in a heated vat of your own secretions and filth.
You remind of what a friend said, which is pretty much that. I don't take bath because it's too much water consumption, but everyone says it's relaxing. What about showering first and then taking a bath, once you're already clean?

Anonymous 469

Yeah, I don't take baths that often, but when I do it's always right after a shower. I don't think many people use baths for actually cleaning themselves anymore, just relaxing and soaking your muscles.

Anonymous 493

What do you guys do when you're dirt poor and can't afford cute clothes, new skincare/makeup to uplift yourselves? Right now I can't even afford basic cleaning products for my new apartment so I've been using vinegar/baking soda and some bleach my mom wasn't using to scrub down my bathroom.

And I've been trying to go for walks several times a day, but besides cleaning/unpacking and minor exercise I'm kind of at a loss for helping myself get out of this rut. It feels even worse looking around my apartment due to how empty it is, if any of you have been in that position before, do you have any advice for home making and general self care on a budget?

Anonymous 499

>>493 never underestimate the power of a good old fashioned library card. They're free to sign up for and you can borrow both fiction and non fiction. Fiction can provide much needed escapism and non fiction can always be classed as personal development, which is very much a form of self love. Knowledge is power, friend.

Anonymous 506

How do you guys get into self care routines?

I was depressed for a really long time and after working on it with medication for a few years Im finally a normal person again. Ofc during that time I never took care of myself and those habits have kind of stuck with me. I feel really lazy and like a lot of self care is a chore. How do you make it more fun? I really want to get into skincare routines

Anonymous 512

Get a Calender and stick it by your mirror where you get ready for the day/ready for bed. Every day you do skincare routine in morning mark an X, or put a sticker. Do the same for night. You can use cute stickers to make it more fun.

I think you have to do something for 26 days before it becomes habit? I'm cheering you on Anon <3

Anonymous 518

Something that helps me is taking progress photos. It feels so awkward and embarrassing, but it feel so good to review them and see the subtle improvements in my skin and hair over time. Also don't try to do it all at once, just add one or two things to your routine at time.

Library card like the other anon mentioned is a great idea. Your library or community center might also have free classes. This time of year I also enjoy collecting plant cuttings during my walks. Obviously don't pinch a plant that looks like it is someone's pride and joy, and don't take all the blooms off of a single plant, but I usually can find a few wild flowers and some bushy foliage to make a mini bouquet with. Or certain plants a very easy to root form a cutting, and you don't necessarily need dirt as they can stay alive in just water for a while (some indefinitely), just be sure to change the water every now and then so nothing grows in it.

Anonymous 527

Cooking good healthy foods and learning more about tastes you like can be great self care, and it doesn't have to be expensive, this is the website i use for dirt-cheap recipes

Skincare and haircare doesn't have to be expensive either, i use basic ingredients from the £1 shop (I'm in UK). Baby oil, coconut oil, some sort of gentle soap based face cleanser, an exfoliating glove will all take you a long way.

As for homemaking, the things that make the most difference are fake plants, scarves and blankets on the walls, cushions, fairy lights. All of which can be found very cheaply and help you cross the line from 'bare' to 'minimalist' apartment.
I recently got some vines of fake ivy from amazon and stuck them so it looks like they're climbing over my bed, which may not be your taste but it made a lot of difference to the room.

I found stretching was a lot more relieving and endorphin-y when i combined it with trigger point massage, which is basically rolling muscles on a tennis ball. you don't need all the tools they use in this article.

good luck fellow poorfag x

Anonymous 530

Adding to >>518 roses can be grown using a cutting and a potato.

Speaking of potatoes, I grew a big load using ones that were going mental in my cupboard because I forgot about them lol. This may of been an off chance though.

I think gardening is a good form of self care because it gets you down to the basics of respecting nature and in turn yourself. Because you are made of the same elements and atoms as the blooms you've been nurturing… it's what I like to think about anyway

Anonymous 551



Thank you guys so so much for all the tips! These are all great ideas <3 I will try making some slow changes and try to change my mindset of it being a chore. I've always wanted to have a morning/night routine to relax and unwind but right now I always feel its a chore.

Anonymous 643

>washing my face
>brushing my teeth
>deep cleaning room and kitchen
>feeding/cleaning after pets
>muscle relaxation techniques
>cuddling/having feelings talk with bf
>reading dumb books
>taking steamy showers
>making art/writing poetry

Anonymous 7537

Shopping and food are go-tos, but I'm trying to exercise restraint and save those for happy occasions.
Here is a list I keep of things to do that do not involve spending $$$ outright.


>giving yourself a mani/pedi
>re-reading a favorite book
>hot bath
>stream a movie
>listen to some favorite music
>take an aimless walk
>face mask
>go for a drive
>watch a youtube makeup tutorial and TRY IT
>practice calligraphy
>make a collage
>play a vidya

Anonymous 30173

>buying very cheap stuff
>browsing clothing stores even tho i wont buy anything
>cooking healthy foods
>listening to music i like
>making spreadsheets/planning for the future
>painting nails
>long bubble baths
>doing my skin care routine

Anonymous 30179

general selfcare:
>clean house
>sit in sunshine
>work on something towards a goal
>repair clothing
>walk dog
>drink hibiscus tea (anti-oxidant rich)
>martial arts classes

>read fanfiction/manga
>listen to podcasts/podfics/audiobooks
>watch a favourite movie

Anonymous 30204

I spend money

Usually I don't spend anything

Anonymous 30205

>clean my bedroom
>cuddle with my spouse or kitty
>youtube rabbit hole- fountain pens, history docs, random let's plays
>make Amazon wishlists knowing damn well I'm broke
>play guitar
>read a book
>try to draw in my sketchbook (I'm terrible)
>cook something wholesome that makes the whole house smell delicious

when I'm really feeling down
>watch Moomins

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