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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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Anonymous 25255

How do you girls enjoy shit like hugs, cuddles, kisses and sex? Even thinking about it makes me want to vomit, and any time a guy initiates any kind of intimacy with me I begin disliking him for it.
I've turned down at least two guys this past month because I can't imagine a relationship with the knowledge that I have to voluntarily do all of that or else he'll feel upset and I'll be the bad one in the relationship.

Anonymous 25257

Were they all really handsy, or something? There definitely has to be someone out there that won't mind keeping it simply a relationship. Anons before have talked about this kind of experience. Asexual romance is real.

Anonymous 25259

I wouldn't say they were, it's probably normal on normie basis. I'm antisocial, so I wouldn't know.
I've actually been in an LDR for 6 months with a guy I'd probably call perfect. He's the type to not talk much, he doesn't have that "cuddly, weak, feelingful and cheesy pussy" side that a lot of guys nowadays have and instead he's there to talk and keep me company. None of that typical, overly-close bullshit like asking for pictures or constantly flirting. He's a channer too, but not the retarded kind. We hate things together.
I was really just wondering if any fellow Anonettes have these kind of feelings.

Anonymous 25262

You have autism and a broken brain.

It's alright though, you can live a fulfilling life like anyone else. Just shut up about your stupid lack of sexuality.

Anonymous 25263

What will you do when you two inevitably meet?

Relationships may not be for you if you can't handle intimacy.

Anonymous 25264

I was aware, thanks. And will do.
I'll see where things go. If he's as touchy as the rest, I'll break it off and go full wine aunt mode.

Anonymous 25265

I want to have physical intimacy in theory but whenever it happens in real life I feel very awkward and unsure of what to do, even when it's family or close friends that I trust. Men try to get physical quickly when I barely know them so instead of feeling awkward I feel disgusted and frightened instead.
Imagination is best.
>Just shut up about your stupid lack of sexuality
I've noticed this trend of hostility towards people experiencing these types of problems. I understand that the problem won't ruin your life or anything, but most problems posted here are the same way. There's nothing wrong with trying to find like-minded individuals to share your experience with. These kinds of posts almost make me believe it's jealously.

Anonymous 25269

People have discussed those relationships here before. They work. I'm honestly jealous, and so is someone else here evidently.

Anonymous 25278

Hugs and cuddles are some of the most comforting things I've ever experienced. I don't think a post like that would indicate jealousy of all things. The hostile tone is probably more out of exasperation.

Anonymous 25283

This. Glad to find someone who can relate so well.
Also, any time anyone brings up such a topic somebody is bound to be a bitch about it on any board I've been to. I get it, that it's unusual for most people, but I don't understand why they can't gloss over it and go to a thread that they're actually going to contribute something to.
Very unjust hostility at that. I don't know why people can't take the "Don't like it? Ignore it." rule and roll with it.

Anonymous 25635

same here. I'm afraid I'm fucked for life

Anonymous 25636

Were you neglected? Or suffered from sort of trauma? Usually when someone is either disgusted by intimacy, or wants to be intimate with lots of different people, there is something very wrong. Thankfully there are lots of different people in the world; there are definitely guys who are both asexual and also hate any sort of physical intimacy.

Anonymous 25638

not liking sex is one thing, but not liking kissing/cuddling guys? OP… have you had any really close friendships with girls in the past?

Anonymous 25657


I wouldn't call it neglect but I never got a lot of affection from my parents. I also went through some shit as an early teen that just fucked me up and made me the robot I am today. Mostly related to being bullied by other girls for being a gullible and autistic kid. I'm a normal adult now, well, as normal as you can count somebody who's completely uninterested in socialising and such.
None at all, anon-chan. I've been afraid and disgusted of other women for life because of above mentioned trauma. CC is the only place where I feel like I can talk to women and relate to them. It might sound like bullshit, and I remember searching "women afraid of women" a couple of years back, already thinking something was not right, so if it doesn't sound credible I don't really care for making it sound credible. Shit's hard, what can I say.

Anonymous 25717

sounds like me, unfortunately. i have a bf but doing anything remotely intimate with him makes me sick or something. it makes me feel terrible, but i think it would be worse if i cried or vomited during sex.
however i used to previously work as an escort and i’m pretty positive that it’s trauma or something from that
i’m just waiting for the day that i really do have to break up with him because i can’t satisfy him

Anonymous 25722

>I wouldn't call it neglect but I never got a lot of affection from my parents.
That's neglect. Humans need affection kids especially need plenty of it.

Anonymous 25772

I still don't blame them for it. They care for me and gave me all I needed. I think it's just the way I was born, it would be retarded to say my parents made me like this.

Anonymous 25778

ot but jungwoo is cute

Anonymous 25812


He is, it's a shame I don't have many photos of him.

Anonymous 25826

I feel similar.

I imagine having sex with guys in order to get myself off (girls, too), but if I think too much about it and start coming up with a realistic narrative, I get disgusted. Anything "cutesy" intimate is disgusting to me (like holding hands, being cuddly, etc).

If I'm with a man, I just want one I can talk to and share my mind with. We can fuck if I'm drugged out, but only fuck, no kissing or any of that shit.

I hate feeling the pressure to be physical at all with a man.

I personally wonder if this feeling would change if it were with a girl. But, like you, I'm actually even more scared of girls than guys. Guys might want to fuck me or be violent, but they don't hit my feelings, ego, the way girls do.

Anonymous 25879

>Guys might want to fuck me or be violent, but they don't hit my feelings, ego, the way girls do.
This, this so much. Fuck.

Anonymous 26173

That's so weird, I love physical intimacy more than anything. When I'm spending time with my boyfriend I'm always near him, touching him, caressing him, cuddling with him etc., he does the same and it's so nice. That said, I'll only ever get physical with someone if I trust them fully and if they're my best friend. I couldn't be physical with a stranger.

>if I think too much about it and start coming up with a realistic narrative, I get disgusted
This I can understand, when getting off I can't imagine any realistic scenario, just the "feeling" of getting fucked or doing something sexual.

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