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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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F Anonymous 30457

I dunno about you guys but I'm ready to end it. Everyone keeps telling me to just "choose to be happy"

Anonymous 30459

My mother always told me to put on a happy face.

Anonymous 30460

You can't choose happiness tbh. Either you are, or you aren't, and if you aren't, maybe you will be.

Anonymous 30461

Put on a smile until you make it.

Anonymous 30464

This world is fucking garbage and moving forward it's only going to go steeply downhill. Every night I have to convince myself not to end it.

Anonymous 30465

I can't know what you're going through, but it sounds like you're around a lot of people that haven't really listened to you or your feelings and it's making the feeling that the world is unlivable even worse.

You don't have to, but please consider talking a bit more about what it is you feel, or what it is you think about that makes you feel like this. I'm sure at least some of us will try and lend a sympathetic ear- 'you are not alone' can sound corny as hell, but you may share some experiences with people on here.

Anonymous 30469


Anonymous 30503

Don't be needlessly cruel.

Anonymous 30504

It's okay man.

Anonymous 30756

>"choose to be happy"
The infuriating thing about people saying that is that they're technically right, but it's a terribly misleading way to word it.

The truth is, you do have to choose to be happy, but you have to keep choosing it all the time. It's not like choosing to buy a lamp (go to store, choose XYZ lamp, buy it, now it's yours, boom done). Choosing to be happy is more like, idk, sobriety or something. You have to choose multiple times a day every day to do and think things that will make you happier, choose to look actively for the little bits of happiness you do have, choose to study them and learn to cultivate them. Sometimes you'll fuck up, and sometimes you won't have the energy to choose anything but the option that gets you through the moment. Overall it works, though it's like building a house with pebbles and each time you decide to be happy you add another pebble. And it's never done, even after you reach a place where you're mainly happy with life.

It's psychological hygiene, and I think a lot of people have it ingrained by the time they're adults, and they forget what it's like to have to do it manually and can't really verbalize how to do it. So they say "choose to be happy" because it's the closest they can get to explaining how they get through their life. Also it just doesn't work as well for some people, and the people for whom it does work well can't see what the problem is.

Anonymous 30868



You can't choose, you have to work for it. Make some goals and try to achive them. If it does not work out, try again, harder this time. Until you achive them, cause you deserved that, you did your best and earned it. Maybe you won't be happy instantly but you'll have a purpose.
Life isn't supposed to be good.

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