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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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Seducing guys as a fat girl Anonymous 39949

Any advice? Even when I'm asking them out they seem to be unsure or just plain not wanting to go out on dates

Anonymous 39950

So you're just trying to get laid? Are you asking for IRL or for apps?

For short term relationships guys look for assets, how easy you are, and how experienced you're likely to be. Think Catherine from Great Gatsby. Being chubby is not necessarily a bad thing if it ends up in the right places.

Long term will be much harder since it's more controlled by guys' protective instincts which trigger around child-like features and slender women who seem more vulnerable.

Anonymous 39961

I don't understand why if you'd be willing to go out of your way to seriously change things like your personality and the way you dress to get dates why you also wouldn't work on weight loss, there's nothing wrong about being overweight but if it makes you insecure enough and in your view undesirable enough that you need to drastically change how you present yourself for men to be attracted to you and you're willing to make that concession why you wouldn't also try to lose weight

Anonymous 39962

>there's nothing wrong about being overweight
Well, there is the issue of personal health and decreased longevity, which is costly to yourself and to the healthcare system, depending on how it works. But that goes the same for fat moids, and for moids who bodybuild.

Anonymous 39963

Eh, if you aren't concerned about your own health then that doesn't really matter

Anonymous 39966

I suppose, but if you don't care about yourself, why do you expect others to care about you?

Anonymous 39967

Also have you tried dating guys that are chubby or fat-fit? In my experience big guys are more okay with big girls.

Anonymous 39968

I mean that's my point about how dressing up and putting on an act to attract men and losing weight to attract men are similar concessions. She might have legitimate reasons why she doesn't want to or can't lose weight but otherwise since it seems like her weight is something she doesn't like I'd just advise she work on getting into better shape. Op still hasn't posted again in the thread so I don't know what her situation is exactly though

Anonymous 39976

I don't get it. Aren't some people naturally on the fatter side even if they eat normally? I've never looked at someone's weight and thought wow, they don't care about themselves.
There are skinny/skinny-fat people who don't do any sports and have couch potato hobbies, yet because their laziness isn't visible, nobody assumes they don't care about themselves.

Anonymous 39977

Define "fatter side", and define "eat normally". It has become culturally encouraged to eat more than is healthy. And people on the fatter side still are mostly capable of being skinnier if they eat less. The fact that the average weight used to be much lower points to a large level of control regardless of genetics. Fatter side would be anywhere overweight, seeing as it has a direct impact on health.

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