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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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Anonymous 40519

>joined twitter for the first time to make friends
>made an account for a popular fandom, yes I’m a sperg
>everyone spams woke shit
>harasses and bullies people for minor things
>just want to share cute art and talk abt vidja
I know I’m an autist, but how tf do you actually make online friends that aren’t retarded? Should I just avoid Twitter

Anonymous 40521

Every time I hear about Twitter, it just sounds like Tumblr back when it was popular

i don't even have advice. I'd say wait until a website's less popular/busy (kinda like post-porn tumblr depending on what fandoms youre looking at), but thats not even a guarantee. shit sux

Anonymous 40523

Why Twitter though? It's the shittiest layout ever, and the people there were ALWAYS cancerous outside of maybe a few. Twitter is just stomping grounds for celebs to complain about everything or be petty.

Anonymous 40525

what would you recommend?

Anonymous 40527

Specific game forums for gaming, plebbit maybe for sharing cute pics or imgur.
You're not going to escape woke culture most likely.
Sorry I don't have better solutions.

Anonymous 40531

would Discord be good? I know there’s tons of groomers on there, and I don’t really have the social skills for it. But it doesn’t seem as woke as Twitter, and I guess people have made friends there

Anonymous 40533

Maybe so. I don't have enough experience with it outside of using it to talk to people I knew irl. Groomers? Groomers for what? There used to be something called tinychat that you could join specific rooms for. It looked like zoom meetings iirc. Maybe that's an option? You have the ability to sign in there without having camera on.

Anonymous 40534

It's a rough question, usually people make friends in environments they're regularly exposed to and share activities everyday. So if you see some one from work or school regularly it gives you the chance to build up courage to interact with them and then if you don't have anything in common you still have the school or work in common.

I just sit in discord channels alone in popular servers, it's miserable most the time but 25% of the time it's pretty entertaining, I've come across pretty interesting people and while I haven't made any decent/long lasting friendships I also haven't made any efforts to reach out to people I might have liked to. I do also find the people who do make an effort to reach out to me pretty annoying, but that very likely could just be being me and finding most people annoying.

There's still a lot of toxic idiots too though and sticking it out and learning how to manage talking to them is definitely feels like swimming up stream.

Anonymous 41529

Use the block function?

Anonymous 41544

It absolutely is. You know how torwards the end before the porn ban, you would get called out for being over 18 and talking to minors or liking a minor character too much? It's like that 10x. The moment you turn 18 on twitter you are a degenerate adult groomer that needs to cease even liking any art and such by minors. There are callout posts and honest to god doxxing for even shipping the wrong thing, you have to conform to all their ideas on money and feminism or people drop you like a hot potato for fear of being called out for following a "bigot", it's hell to be honest. I made an account just to lurk but still saw all this go down with other users.

Anonymous 41571

yeah, I stopped using my Twitter like a week after creation. on even Animal Crossing Twitter, the amount of ACAB they/them communist MiNoRs is insane.

if you don’t retweet 1000 change.com petitions a day or put your pronouns in your bio or something, people will start to get angry at you. you have to walk on eggshells around these people or else they’ll harass you and try to doxx you. people were calling an artist a pedophile for drawing hentai of a 17yo anime character lmfao

Anonymous 41583

I guess ever since Tumblr got purged Twitter became the new “they/them, transfemme, poly, ACAB Marx ~*<3*~” haven? I check tumblr infrequently for Zelda fan art and it looks like those pockets are still there, but they seem to be remnants of what was. Whereas all the new zoomer kids who think the same things want a hip new platform and think tumblr is too old

Anonymous 41607

Twitter and tumblr are largely the previous 'generation' of the woke crowd not so much zoomers who're much more into Discord or other non-public areas.

Anonymous 41618

yeah i hate this feeling. i have no social stamina, i've been stung so many times that the task of having to filter though tons of people to find anyone decent overwhelms me with anxiety. i know from experience that i can't figure out how to cut someone off if they keep bugging me, even though the majority of the time it's me who fails to maintain regular contact

Anonymous 41646

>joined twitter to make friends
You have no one but yourself to blame.
Just accept your fate as an anonymous imageboard user until, and if, you find something better.

Anonymous 41714

i just want online friends tbh. how do people make online friends

Anonymous 41744

You don't. Friends only exist IRL.

Anonymous 41746

agreed 100% i think online friends are only better in theory

Anonymous 41747

It's like pedestrians. It's nice to talk to them, so you should never go out of your way to avoid them. Friends are people you hold close, and basically see at least once a day. This is a forgotten fact, and because of that pretty much everyone is lonely today, because they can't bring themselves to initiate small talk with a stranger.

Anonymous 41748

but I can’t break down my walls around my irl friends. All my friends would hate me if they knew the real me.

Plus, I just want someone to play vidja with and talk about anime or something

Anonymous 41754

Then they're not friends. They're acquaintances. Make friends, anon.

Anonymous 41824

i feel this, my behavior is so accustomed to autistic shit i can never properly talk to normies without being bored out of my mind or holding a facade.
also like someone else said, twitter is littered with minors and fake people. it's probably one of the worse places to meet people since people are obsessed with clout.

Anonymous 41831

i felt this, i'm autistic and don't trust normies at all.

Anonymous 41860

how do I make frens

Anonymous 41862

Same boat
>Joined discord to have someone to talk to.
>Got kicked out of a small group that i like and getting along within a day because i made a minor offense
>Try joining bigger communities there.
>Either got ignored or they dont care because im not interesting enough.
Dunno why but im sad, i tried my best u guys, i just wanna cry huuhuu…I just want to have fun and make friends online. Sometimes i really dislike forming connections online, u don't know who u are talking to.

Anonymous 41874

Open up either them or yourself, and talk more about your problems than what's new on the tube. It all starts with just asking them how they are.

Anonymous 41893

I tried making friends both on tumblr and Twitter. I had success on both but the only lasting friendship was from tumblr. For OP I recommend trying tumblr a good chunk of the crazies migrated to twitter which rapidly destroyed that already rotting cesspool.

I made most of my online friends by becoming mutuals with them, then dm them about shared interests. It works mostly but there is times where some don't reply back or they reply but suddenly stop all replies. It's a gamble really making online friends

Anonymous 41924

Some of the best people I've talked to have been people who don't even have any social media or barely use it at all anymore. I know it's probably not want you want to hear OP, but you should just give up because online communities have been so overtaken by these types that it's more effort than it's worth these days. The internet isn't fun like it used to be and alot of the online friends I had barely use social media nowadays, probably a large part because of that. Just go out and focus more on making IRL friends (Er, when the pandemic is over at least..).

Anonymous 41929

Anonymous imageboards are kind of a blessing and a curse. They let people be honest enough that they'd show the parts of their personality that makes you want to get to know them more, and the nature of a forum means that responses aren't very time sensitive, so you can easily have multiple long running conversations even within the same topic. But the whole idea is that you can't actually know who they are, so unless you actively choose to not be anonymous, it all ends once the topic is locked. Maybe if there was some kind of PM system, but it's way too easy to see how that'd be abused, and even its existence might undermine the culture of an imageboard. It's a bummer.

Anonymous 41932

I hate to tell you this but online friendships dont really last. Its better to have irl friends than online friends anon.

Anonymous 41958

Thats not true in my experience, I have a few online friends Ive been talking to pretty much daily for the past 5 years. Except for a few childhood friends theyre my oldest friends.

Anonymous 41959

Online friendships give people the choice and freedom to be friends outside of close proximity in real life

Anonymous 41989

That's not really friends though.

Anonymous 42002

my online friends are the people ive known the longest and have been through everything with me including puberty, passing middleschool and going through highschool. who hurt you?

Anonymous 42007

I have my current job thanks to my online friends, it's the coziest, easiest and most rewarding job I've had, saved me from having to go back to my abusive parents. I've known them for 6 years now and interact with them daily, looking forward to what they have to say and the things they do like no irl friendship ever was.

Anonymous 42011

What do you do if you don’t mind me asking

Anonymous 42014

Just because you had a good experience with online friendships doesnt mean that others will have one to. To be clear, no one has or had ever hurted me before, its just that online friendships never worked for me, it never really clicked. The people ive interacted with just talked for a while and the messages just kept getting fewer and fewer, we grew apart apparently for one reason or another. Its good that ive seen more good examples of online friendships that actually last and helped people with their lives. Each person had their own reason on why certain things did not work for them, please consider that.

Anonymous 42016

I do web development, it's really easy to get into this day and age, I'm self taught and doing a computer science degree is a complete waste of time and money(for web), you can either do 3-5 wasteful years in uni or spend one single year to yourself learning and be better prepared. And trust me I would know because I didn't learn fuck all from the few years of college I did (I dropped out).

That said, my friends are all high value people, the kind that get shit done, entrepreneurial, etc. They're always doing something, there was luck involved but when you're surrounded by these kinds of people it's significantly more likely to the point I had two distinct cozy from home jobs from them, an offer and a project I carried out with another.

Anonymous 42017


That's a better take on the matter than >>41932 , you're not wrong either, I'm a complete shut in that goes outside twice a week to get groceries so it works for me.

Though if you or any other miners want to have a successful online friend group it works a lot better if you're all in a mutual group so it's not one on one which is where more often then not it dies off like you said.

Anonymous 42020

Ive just felt like >>41932 anon had their own reason to be mad, and the anons that bombarded them with replies didnt really put other peoples experience into consideration. Not all online "friendships" or relationship can be helpful and beneficial. Some people were cyberbullied, some were groomed,some were scammed emotionally or finacially from these online friendships. The result can be incredibly damaging and some even consider taking their own lives as a result. Putting your experience on first and disregard others isnt a very good thing to do esp when they are talking about their first hand experience. Your experience is good doesnt rule out the bad experience that others have.

Anonymous 42021

>the anons that bombarded them with replies didnt really put other peoples experience into consideration.
The same can be said in the other direction though. She didn't say "I had bad experiences with online friends," she said "online friendships don't last," and that it's better for the OP to have irl friends. She was making an objective statement, so it opens her up to others say that she's objectively wrong - some online relationships do last.
If she was just talking about her subjective experiences, then her perspective would be valid like you're saying: there are some bad experiences, so people should be aware that bad experiences can happen. But I don't think anyone doubts that there can be traumatic online friendship experiences just in the same way that people can have traumatic real life friendship experiences.

Anonymous 42022

discord, not twitter.

Anonymous 42028


You need to put yourself in an online public setting like a game, a hobby group, forum and interact with the people there until you find some people you resonate with, then abscond with them to your own private group or maybe you get invited to one of theirs if they think you're cool and they want you there, though some people treat it more like collecting random internet people than a coherent group to feed their egos so watch out for that.


The amount of fuckbois in the public servers there made me lose my mind like holy FUCK they're so brazen and nobody gives a fuck not to mention the IM grooming, jesus christ how is discord even allowed to exist.

Rant aside I use it to keep in touch with my closest friends in our own separate and private group where no one gets invited, I IM 4 others directly

Anonymous 42048

>The amount of fuckbois in the public servers there made me lose my mind like holy FUCK they're so brazen and nobody gives a fuck not to mention the IM grooming, jesus christ how is discord even allowed to exist.
Join female only server, good server with a specific topic you enjoy, or vetted servers and you shouldn't be having any of those problems. It's not omegle, you can actually be selective about the people you interact with.

Anonymous 42053

I think it's pretty similar to making friends in general: be someone that someone would want to talk to. Have interests or passions that you can talk about; ask questions and be interested in the lives and passions of others. Most people won't be someone you want to be friends with, but the only way to find those people is to put in the work of getting to know people and being someone that people would want to know.

After that, it's just being in the places that would have the sort of people you want to be around, like discords, subreddits, tumblr blogs, imageboards for specific media or hobbies or ideas.

Anonymous 43774

>my friends are all high value people, the kind that get shit done, entrepreneurial, etc.
i desperately need more people like this in my life, where do you find them. all i'm surrounded with every day are dysfunctional, self-pitying mental cases who have no real interests or aspirations

Anonymous 46248

>I do web development, it's really easy to get into this day and age, I'm self taught and doing a computer science degree is a complete waste of time and money(for web), you can either do 3-5 wasteful years in uni or spend one single year to yourself learning and be better prepared.
Sorry to necro but please guide me onto this path, work and people scare me.

Anonymous 46249

Imagine being socially competent enough to network properly.

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