I don't want to exist Anonymous 52784
Not death. This isn't some suicidal cry for help or anything. I just don't want to exist. I want to sit outside of time and watch everybody I love live happy lives, and I want to be able to push them along the right paths to make sure that happens. I don't want to interfere with anybody else, I just want to watch people live and make mistakes and fall in love and whatever else…
God. I really don't want to exist. It's too much sometimes. The only time I don't feel like I exist is when I'm dancing. I know that sounds weird.
Ah. This suddenly strikes me as stupid.
that actually sounds super nice
i wish I could just be erased from everyone's memories and disappear
there's a character from an old anime who was like that too. He fought to make a wish that he didn't exist, but that's all I remember.
I used to feel like this. Recently I moved on to having a homebody dream. I'm in uni for a major where I can work from home. I met a great guy too, and I can socialize with him and when we have kids I can see life via them. I would still exist, but the reality is being at the home all the time would see the world pass me by in the same way. But it's not as passive as your feelings.
You don't want to not exist, you want to be an immortal disembodied observer. Too bad though, to be an observer is to be temporal.
the idea of children and being a housewife used to appease me but these days I just really don't want to be here in any way. >>52881
does the distinction matter? I guess I'd better be specific if I ever run into some wish granting demon or lamp imprisoned genie.
this is exactly what i wish for..to be a sort of ghost..being able to be by the side of the people i care about.. to help them without them knowing of my ghost presence
maybe you should become a dancer
No, I get it. Sometimes I wish to stop being perceived and become just an observer. Maybe even selfishly intervene for a while but then delete any consequences of the interaction.