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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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Anonymous 60420

Why is friendzoning considered worse than fuckzoning?

If I have a crush on someone it's because they're a great person, I don't need to get in their pants, I'd also be happy with being friends with someone like that. Hearing "either we bone or I have no interest in interacting with you" sounds like a huge insult to me and if my crush implied that I would no longer want to bone them in the first place.

Anonymous 60422


Because men feel entitled to womens bodies, especially if they have "invested" in you. By denying them sex you are, in their eyes, robbing them of something they own.

Anonymous 60426

As a female nice guy, I can't relate to what you are saying. Also, men make useless friends.

Anonymous 60434

I wish my ex had friendzoned me for real instead of trying to dial back our relationship to FWB as if I could unfeel the love I had. Getting dumped like that was one of the most hurtful and traumatizing experiences and to this day he will message me occasionally asking why I avoid him.

Anonymous 60458

Similar thing happened to me. As soon as he told me he wanted to just be friends, I ghosted without explanation and blocked him on everything. Luckily we never had sex but if we had and then he had tried that I probably would have strangled him. Whenever a moid does something like this, I assume he is doing it on purpose just to be hurtful. Sorry it happened to you.

Anonymous 60459

Sounds like he was a typical narc trying to inflict narcissistic injury. They get off on making people feel used or not good enough.

But you shouldn’t take it as a personal insult because they are whackjobs with a skewed sense of reality. They’re just doing their job of being an asshole.

Anonymous 60480

Very similar story here. My highschool boyfriend tried really hard to bait me into a physical relationship with the potential to be together again for real. I ended up being a virgin until nearly 30, but I think if he had tricked me into FWB the regret would annoy me until I died. I never valued my virginity, but I do think women at large should be extremely selective with who gets to fuck them.

Anonymous 60481

>If I have a crush, I'd also be happy with being friends
let's rephrase that slightly: if you have a crush, you would be happy with him boning someone else

Anonymous 60482


>but I do think women at large should be extremely selective with who gets to fuck them
extremely based. Quality men value this trait btw. Although many of them don't believe such women exist anymore.
>Sounds like he was a typical narc
you can label things all you want but in the end it comes down to this: some people are just really shitty at choosing partners. I don't know exactly why -I have my suspicions- but many among both genders seem to have an innate attraction to people exhibiting traits from the dark triad.
>pic related
note how these character traits find expression in popular culture

Anonymous 60492

Most men are shit so how can you blame women for choosing shit partners when the odds of finding a good one were stacked against them in the first place lol. Also your post reeks of moid.

Anonymous 60495

You did good. Virginity is only worth giving to a moid who will actually marry you.

Anonymous 60502

Perverted to put it like that but yes, I've had a crush on a straight girl and I obviously never pursued her. I was genuinely happy when she found a boyfriend and I think her boyfriend is a good person too, I'm happy to be friends with both of them.

Anonymous 76357

Men are mainly inerested in women as a way to get their dick wet, the rest is secondary.

Anonymous 76371

Women really need to deny sex for at least a year, maybe more. Media has poisoned our brains to think that if we don't fuck quick it's not a real relationship. I find it funny when women say they're used for sex when trying to find something serious, yet they're the ones giving the sex out like candy.

Anonymous 76377

yeah. I do think women should be able to do what they want with their sex lives but at the same time, we carry all the risk. there's no guarantee that we'll even have good/pleasurable sex, if we get pregnant there's no guarantee you'll get good support from the guy, and it's your reputation on the line - you will be seen as the whore while the man is just seen as a man.

in the last 10 years has much changed re: sex positivity? I don't think anything significant has. more men might claim to be ~sex positive~ because they just want to fuck, but plenty of them still low key judge you if you say you've fucked "too many" guys.

Anonymous 76382

The sexual revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for mankind.

Anonymous 76404

*for failedmales (as it should)

Anonymous 76410

that doesn't help women though.

Anonymous 76567

Yes it does. Weeding genetic failures out helps all of us.

Anonymous 76848

Am I the only woman who naturally wants to fuck men I'm attracted to?
What's up with these posts that make sound that the only reason women would fuck a man is to please him only? Is that board really that much full of scrotes? wtf

Anonymous 77023


Imagine being emotionally invested in scrote

Anonymous 77039

You're just a healthy person who's comfortable with attraction and relationships.
The rest of the miners here are all traumatized or have psychological problems regarding dating, most likely due to past experience, some are too delusional to admit.
Normal people don't think like this >>76852 >>77023

>>77017 is right though, having sex with men before establishing trust is to the detriment of women, but I'm sure you understand that

Anonymous 77110

Both are rather awful for the afflicted, but I'd say that friendzoning is worse due to the false hope of a chance it leaves. Still being friends keeps the emotional connection alive, and it's that connection that the afflicted struggles with.

Anonymous 77134

it's absolutely not worse and anyone, male or female, who is preoccupied by the idea of being "friendzoned" is emotionally unhealthy imho.

Anonymous 77206

Because you can't be friends because you have nothing in common, no common interests or hobbies and he is only after sex. If he wanted to hang out he would do so with people he shares interests in.
You don't hear about friendzone stuff from people who are actually friends and like to hang out with eachother.

Anonymous 77332

Friendzone only means your crush rejected you.
Both the friendzone and fuckzone suck.
I'd be mad if my crush was trying to bait me into fwb or only cared about sex.
I'd also be mad if the person I was dating wouldn't ever fuck me.

Just think if you were married and wanted kids but your husband didn't. However you one day get divorced and when he remarries he has kids with his new wife. Any form of rejection honestly just hurts.

I'd be happy if my crush who friendzoned me got a partner. I want the best for them but I would totally talk to them way less often if at all. I don't blame anyone who stops talking to their crush or deletes them. It's literally just so you can place emotional distance between yourself and them so you can move on. Wouldn't even mind talking to them again once my feelings passed up but usually by then the platonic relationship is dead too.

The best thing is to never get too crazy about someone and ask your crush out asap so it hurts less. The rejection from the crush you had for a week will hurt less than the one you had for years.

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