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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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Anonymous 69797

Have any of you ever had a partner try and force non monogamy on you? How did you react?

Anonymous 69799

I don't know if this counts but one of my boyfriends, who was pornsick, at the end of our relationship he told me that he wanted a threesome. I either was simply weirded out and put off, or cried because he had been telling me a lot of disgusting shit recently.

Anonymous 69800

btw it was a FFM threesome he meant, of course

Anonymous 69802

my first boyfriend in college figured out he was poly a few months into our relationship. he begged and begged and begged for our relationship to be opened. he just ~loved~ (lol) me so much that he didn't want to dump me even though i am rigidly monogamous
i was an inexperienced autist who didn't know how to communicate properly or respect myself and my own hard boundaries so i was eventually worn down
those months of our relationship being open were the worst months of my entire life. i had just started bc too so i was an absolute emotional wreck. i can't remember a single night where i didn't cry myself to sleep. he only had a single ONS because he was ugly as sin, but it constantly hurt feeling like i was never enough
it was a semi-long distance relationship too (2 hour drive, but he never felt like driving down so i only saw him 4 times the whole year we were together lol)
we eventually closed it when i told him how this wasn't working but he cheated on me a few weeks later anyway.
fuck sex-obsessed moids basically

Anonymous 69807

Good god what is the fucking point of being in a relationship if you have to put up with any of that.

Anonymous 69808

I would have left him in the dirt and just ghosted him on the spot if he was pornsick. What in christ ?? What is the fucking point????

Anonymous 69809

This makes me legitimately sick. It makes me hate all of you honestly. Its fucking pathetic, inexcusable.

Anonymous 69810

Like a non-bimbo OP. Get a fucking clue.

Anonymous 69813

What the fuck is your problem lmao

Anonymous 69893

Sort of a different story than the ones told here so far, and one to which I'm somewhat of an outsider, but one that I wanted to share anyways.

I was best friends in high school with this super BPD girl, she was about a year older than me, and in a ldr with a slightly older guy. Both bisexual, later both came out as fully gay lol but I am dubious of this for many reasons (and the bpd girl later transed and then detransed apparently, but unrelated lol). The girl was extremely pornsick to a frightening degree and overshared her weird sex stuff to me constantly. Lots of scary fetishes, and just kept developing more and getting worse ones. She was apparently very critical of the boyfriend's sexual performance and dick size, and even got him to buy some sort of sex toy that went over his dick to make it larger or something. To me it always seemed like she was overly critical of him in that aspect, to me he always struck me as a well meaning if inexperienced fella and she just wasn't satisfied because he wasn't choking her to the point of near unconsciousness and beating her black and blue when they fucked.

Anyway, in the last year of their relationship she wore him down into "opening their relationship", meaning that she was hooking up with 3 or 4 men in their 30s and like 2 online girlfriends, and he had one guy on the side and just seemed sad. She never stopped talking about these old guys that she was banging either, and they were in constant rotation because she would have to dump one every 2 months for being an insane creep, who would've guessed. Eventually these two broke up with each other, the guy came out as gay shortly afterwards. But a couple years later I've been talking to him and he thinks that he's bi again, I think his experience with this girl was so horrifically negative that it made him think he had no more attraction to women. I feel so terrible for him. I don't talk to the girl anymore because she became too much for me to handle, and she also kept repeatedly trying to rope me into her sexual antics, which I wanted no part of.

Idk, I guess the moral of the story here is that anyone and everyone can destroy their life and tear down people around them with pornsickness and commitment issues.

Anonymous 69894

Oh, and a small addendum, the last time I ever spoke with that girl, she was in heavy with adult baby diaper shit communities. I view her as an unfortunate cautionary tale.

Anonymous 70011

What does it means if I'm the one that suggests it ? I remember that I suggested a threesome with my (female) friend to my ex bf but he refused.

I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me. I just get bored so fast. I feel like my only way to have a long lasting relationship would be to have an open one (no poly shit tho). Are people like me allowed to exist ? I hate this "one size fits all" model for relationship people have.

>try and force

Anyways, forcing it is a terrible idea, if your partner isn't into it, it's pointless and toxic to push it.

Anonymous 70483

Learn to tolerate boredom and only do basic stuff in bed. You have seen that non basic things cause problems.

Anonymous 70487

>an open one (no poly shit tho).

Anonymous 70493

Poly is having two husbands
Open is having one husband and a rotating carousel of fuckbuddies

Anonymous 70545

Do you even want a relationship? You can just stay single you know.

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