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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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Anonymous 76610

I'm 5'11.5. My mother complements me on my height, but I hate being this tall. Clothes don't fit me properly. I am lanky and awkward, especially in small places like getting into cars. My back hurts. But most of all, it's such a huge challenge getting a moid to like me.

I don't get asked out like other girls. Moids of an acceptable height are incredibly rare. Those that are all want to date petite or average sized Staceys. They don't want to date a lanky beanstalk. I feel like I'm always last in line to be chosen. Once I overheard a moid I was kind of crushing on that he would ask me out if X rejected him. Like he was so certain I would say yes because I'm desperate (I am). I would've said yes because I have no choices, but I hate that I would.

Any other lanklets have the same experience?

Anonymous 76611

mock men and start understanding that just because the world is that way doesnt mean its right.

maybe try taking other tall women as an exemple? follow some on instagram who also share what brands they wear so you can find better clothes that fit you.

don't accept demeaning comments. be as harsh as people are to you and be nice when they are nice. you'll respect yourself through showing dignity.

Anonymous 76612

Someone should make a movie about this

Anonymous 76616

>Moids of an acceptable height are incredibly rare.
Ironically, that's probably exactly how they feel about you.

Anonymous 76621

That line makes me think this thread is bait

Anonymous 76622

I don't want to look bitter my mocking men. They don't really mock me, just silently don't date me or mention to their friends they won't date me. I think it would look pathetic if I did that, because it's not like they want to date me anyway. They have many other choices.

I do follow such Instagrams, but usually I try to downplay my height by wearing flats, hunching a bit and smoothing down my hair (can reduce my apparent height by almost a half inch).
It's be two hours of a tall woman squeezing into cars and not going on dates.
I know. Maybe some day I will find a moid that isn't taken that likes me.
I want a guy taller than me. It doesn't have to be like five inches tall than me. Just a little bit. I don't think that's unreasonable. Most women wouldn't date a guy shorter than them.

Anonymous 76639

Well if you're willing to choose your bf's height then you're not that desperate I guess. In a way it's good for you, though I'd say you should try dating shorter men who are confident with their height and see where it goes.

>hunching a bit

That literally never looks good (well, some men find it cute when a girls looks uncofident/overly shy/looks like they've never seen a penis, but they generally aren't good bf material). Your height is a part of your appearance, don't fight it, learn to feel good with it.

Anonymous 76650

I think you should own it, honestly. Stand up straight and tall, wear heels even, fake confidence until you actually become confident. Fuck being desperate, become confident

Anonymous 76657

>he would ask me out if X rejected him
Never be a man's second choice because you're just setting yourself up to get dumped by him when he gets a new first choice.

Anonymous 76664

>date a shorter guy
I don't think that's any point dating a guy I'm not attracted too, breeding resentment and ending it after awhile.

>hunching is bad

If I stand up straight it looks really bad too, I'm so tall… Most girls are at my chest, I wish I was their height.

Maybe some moid will find my confidence attractive, but I think most prefer the shy type.

I don't want to settle for anyone, but I think I'll have to settle a bit. If only moids weren't so shallow about this.

Anonymous 76666


>i dont want moids to settle for me
>how do i settle for a moid that wont settle for me

Anonymous 76669

tall guys like tall girls

Anonymous 76671

I don't know what you're trying to say
This isn't true. Guys all like girls 5'7 tops. I have one average height female friend (she has had a few boyfriends before so I think she's knows a bit) tell me boys don't like tall girls because they look manly and dominating. It really hit my self esteem.

Anonymous 76672

Most might, but some do. Being tall doesn't necessarily mean you look "manly and dominating". I'm sure a +6 foot tall lanky guy would appreciate it.

Anonymous 76673

A guy I knew who's well over 6' said he prefers tall girls because he wants his kids to be tall.

Anonymous 76676

guys just want a girl who's shorter than them. They don't really care about a girl's height otherwise.

Anonymous 76678

A 6'+ guy would have a LOT of options. I'm definitely on the further tail end of those options.
I think you can find moids who want anything under the sun, but it's very rare in my case.
They want a girl who's a few inches shorter than them, at least. I see online many have hard caps as low as 5'6. It's really disheartening that they're so shallow. I don't know why they care about height so much.

Anonymous 76679

They usually don't care about height that much

Anonymous 76680

What do moids care about?

Anonymous 76683

they care if you're pretty

Anonymous 76684

your friend is a bitch and likely insecure about her height. tall girls have beautiful long legs and an elegant, slimmed down figure.
as a short girl (i'm not even 5'1) i feel a lot of admiration for them and wish i was taller as well.
men like all kinds of girls, tall, short, average etc, some even prefer tall girls.
they will fuck literally anything so stop being insecure about your physical appearance scrotes dont deserve that and they will gf you in a heartbeat anyways

Anonymous 76693

just get a tall lanky beanstalk bf

Anonymous 76694


They weren't kidding when they said this site was filled with larping trannies.

Anonymous 76695

Men love trash-talking women who look like the opposite of their girlfriends to make the latter feel better about themselves. They also make fun of short women like me for looking like midgets or p*dobait while singing praises of long legs and women with tall model statures. Don't take what your "friend" said seriously.

Anonymous 76714

There are plenty of lanky socially awkward nerdy guys without gfs who would love a girl like you

Anonymous 76716

It's all about lack of masculinity. Same with muscular women - emasculated men don't feel masculine by themselves so they need a very feminine counterpart to look masculine.

Anonymous 76742

This thread reads like bait. I mean, why are you complaining about moids being shallow when you yourself said that you wouldn't date a shorter guy?

Anonymous 76743

I think that's true to a certain extent. Up to 5'8 tops. Being as tall as a quarterback doesn't look good.
They are pretty popular among regular sized girls too
I'm a biological female
There aren't that many nerdy guys of an acceptable height, but how do I approach them without looking desperate?
You're saying I will have more luck with more masculine men? I feel like more masculine men want more feminine women too
I don't think it's an outlandish requirement. Most girls want a guy taller than them, and many girls here seem to have a tall bf as well. The problem isn't that I don't know any tall guys, it's that they always seem to be taken. I'm always queueing up for them.

Anonymous 76744

It's okay to have standards but it started to look like bait when you mentioned how shallow men are for not dating you because of your height but then you mentioning that you wouldn't date short guys. It's just hypocritical

Anonymous 76746

>your friend is a bitch and likely insecure about her height. tall girls have beautiful long legs and an elegant, slimmed down figure.
How is she insecure? Women not sugarcoating things and telling their true experience with men isn't being insecure.
>as a short girl (i'm not even 5'1) i feel a lot of admiration for them and wish i was taller as well.
Grass is always greener on the other side, eh? This is the same thing with small boobed girls wanting to have big boobs and big boobed girls wanting to have smaller boobs.
>men like all kinds of girls, tall, short, average etc, some even prefer tall girls.
This is true, but you cant deny some are considered more desirable or attractive than others
>they will fuck literally anything so stop being insecure about your physical appearance scrotes dont deserve that and they will gf you in a heartbeat anyways
How is that a good thing? OP wants a boyfriend not a fuckbuddy.

Anonymous 76747

Moids are shallow. They just pick the prettiest, petite girl. They have zero interest in personality, intelligence or anything else that makes a person human. They just want to coom in the most feminine girl around.

Anonymous 76748

This is just pure cope

Anonymous 76749

How many times has a guy dated a girl because she's intelligent? Or kind?

Go away, moid.

Anonymous 76751

Yhose traits play a part in dating for both genders lol, nobody just dates a person because they're 'kind' or 'intelligent'

Anonymous 76756

>There aren't that many nerdy guys of an acceptable height, but how do I approach them without looking desperate?

Nerds are just as likely to be tall as any other type of moid (though they have a slightly easier time with women than their short counterparts).

An awkward lanklet guy would be happy a girl is interested in him. I wouldn't worry that much about appearing desperate, these moids are desperate too lol.

Anonymous 76757

that's a half-truth

Anonymous 76758

Height is pretty low on a man's list for attractiveness. They care about your face and your figure the most.
You mentioned that you're skinny. That puts you ahead of all the overweight/obese short girls. You'll probably have an easier time keeping the pounds off too.

Anonymous 76762


There aren't that many men of an acceptable height to me, and nerdy men who also meet that criteria are even rarer. Where would I look for such moids? I don't know any personally. I was thinking of getting a "thing" to stand out, like being goth.

I suppose I should rephrase: the moids of an acceptable height have a lot of girls interested in them. I'm not super pretty or anything. I'm not overweight, but they've got a ton of not overweight girls going after them too.

Anonymous 76767

>Moids are shallow.
And so is OP, who seems awfully hesitant to admit it, while claiming guys are all shallow.

Anonymous 76769

>How is she insecure?
what other reason would one have to tell a friend a physical characteristic they have is not liked by the opposite sex?
if it's not insecurity, then she's just rude and lacks social and emotional intelligence.
unless op explicitly asked her friend if in her experience men like tall girls, her comment is just salty and ignorant

>but you cant deny some are considered more desirable or attractive than others

what is considered attractive varies so much cross-culturally and historically, and individually, that it's hard to agree. anyways op wants a boyfriend, not an harem of retards with cookie cutter tastes media dictated tastes, so what is being currently imposed as hot isnt relevant

>How is that a good thing? OP wants a boyfriend not a fuckbuddy

and a boyfriend will want to have sex with her first and foremost, its moids we are talking about and easy access to sex is their driving force behind getting into a relationship

Anonymous 76770

here comes the moid gotcha! crawl back to r9k, genetic dead end

Anonymous 76772

To clarify, I was talking with her about this, it's not like she brought it up out of nowhere.


OK maybe I shouldn't have said shallow?? I just mean like, I wish it wasn't so hard. That guys didn't care about height so much, or other girls dated closer to their height. Like, why does a 5'1 girl want to go after a 6'2 guy for??

Anonymous 76773


>OP literally says "if only moids weren't so shallow" after saying she doesn't want to settle for anyone
>point out that she dances around the issue when getting called out about it
>lmao moid got 'em

Anonymous 76775

ahahah for moids settling isnt shallowness. imagine wanting sex and an ego stroke so much you're willing to be with someone you not only dont love, but also dont even find satisfactory enough physically, mentally or both. not everyone is a mediocre shallow urge driven coomchimp dying on the floor for validation

Anonymous 76776

so people should not date who they want because they should think about others first? or if you love or want to fuck someone and youre 5'1 and they also like you you should be like "ill be with someone close to my height though…"
where do you live lol

Anonymous 76779

I like tall men too, why shouldn't I go after them just because I'm short?

Anonymous 76780

I understand wanting a moid somewhat taller than you, but why ten or more inches taller? It's like if I exclusively went after 7' guys. It's just weird.

Anonymous 76781

Because I like really tall men? Why do you so desperately need a guy to be taller than you and can't settle for a 5'11 or'10 guy?

Anonymous 76783

What's wrong with wanting tall men? Are you one of those people who think it's evil to have standards? I can't choose who I'm attracted to, I was born this way.

Anonymous 76785

It's like those very young girls who want to date an older guy. I want a guy at least a bit taller than me. I don't want a guy who is, relatively speaking, as tall as my dad was to me when I was 12.

Anonymous 76786

not only the "if you're x height then you shouldnt want y height!!" argument retarded its also shallow lol. what if someone falls in love with a person who doesnt have the crystal cafe nona approved height difference?

Anonymous 76787

Yes, I agree. I'm 5'0 and the guy I like is 6'1. I would normally prefer someone who is way shorter, but I fell in love with someone who is quite tall, especially compared to me, and I can't control such strong feelings. I don't love him because of his height but because of all that he is as a person.

Anonymous 76790

So he just happens to be the one in ten guys who's above 6 feet? I understand if it happens once or twice, but I see my short female friends always "falling in love" with super tall guys. I mean, it's like a girl who says she doesn't care about money but incidentally keeps dating millionaires? Something you just want to say? I won't judge.

Anonymous 76794

are you a short man by any chance?

Anonymous 76797

6'1 and muscular here. I never dated before I met my partner, but I was only ever approached by shorter men who wanted me to step on and dominate them. I did ask a group of guys during a party and they near-unanimously agreed it was humiliating/intimidating to be in a public relationship with a woman more than two inches taller than them. It hasn't made me an femcel, but it's made me act like a racist as I avoid places like supermarkets in areas with lots of ethnic people so I'm not constantly harassed with staring, pointing, laughing and unwanted touching.

Anonymous 76799

What does your current bf think about your height? Is he tall?

Anonymous 76804

but you're the first being swallow about height, are you even trying to bait?

Anonymous 76814

wouldnt surprise me if this post was written by a r9k moid so they have something to complain about

'look at this stupid femoid who lacks self-awarness' type of post. If OP isn't a scrote then it's probably her personality why she can't find a guy

Anonymous 76820

Ethnic people are laughing at you because you’re a 6’1 tranny. Not because you’re a tall girl, hon.

Anonymous 76824

One of my best friends is objectively not very attractive (negative canthal tilt, etc) and she was dating this gorgeous, tall, intelligent man because she was tall and intelligent herself (they both have phds). He likes her because she is kind, feminine, pleasant to be around, and tall + intelligent. The only reason they aren't together is because he hasn't been able to see her in two years because of the pandemic restrictions to enter the country. We're italian and he's american so maybe the foreign aspect helps.

Anonymous 76828

thts a rly weird hangup, looking at potential bf and seein ur dad lmao

Anonymous 76832

>I don't think it's an outlandish requirement. Most girls want a guy taller than them
>women under 5'6 want a 5'9+ guy (half of all men) so that's the same thing as me wanting a guy well over 6 feet (a small fraction of men)
I get that you didn't choose to have this preference and you can't really change it, but if there are other things you'd like in a man like a decent personality you will find you have to make a compromise most likely. as men get taller they only become attractive to more women. if you're dead set on getting a man from the most desirable category (objectively tall) that means you're competing with virtually all women for said man. the way you've described yourself you don't sound like you're in the top 5% of women so why should a top 5% man want you? let's assume by the way that a woman's height is neutral in the eyes of a tall man. it may be a detriment to shorter men (knocks their confidence) but I don't believe tall men mind. I also don't believe they generally prefer tall women. they probably simply don't care and make their decision based on other factors. if you're in the top 5% of those other factors overall then no worries. if not, your expectations may be unrealistic.

Anonymous 76833

>moids settle just to get sex, so shallow
how is that different from the pickmeishas on this board constantly posting about how they're with guys they literally DON'T LIKE? do the math on that. why are they with those guys? must be something other than personality.

Anonymous 76834

>I'm 5'0 and the guy I like is 6'1. I would normally prefer someone who is way shorter

Anonymous 76835

companionship, validation, the support of feeling like someone might have your back in this world. maybe they have chronic health issues, who knows.

Anonymous 76836

Height is completely irrelevant here. We're talking about op's hypocrisy. There's nothing wrong with having standards but then she shits on men and short women for having standards too lol

Anonymous 76838

As I've said before I'm a bio female
Even if there's only 5% of men in that category, there must be hundreds of thousands of men who fit that profile. So I don't think it's
I think you've just put your finger on it. There's not much changing the way I was born. Wish I was shorter, it would be easier to date then.

Anonymous 76839

I mean I don't hate them or anything, it's just that I wish things were easier.

Anonymous 76840

He's a little shorter than me, like less than an inch, but it never bothered him and he's excited our kids will be tall.

Hurtful, but not a tranny, just genetically predisposed to being tall and maintaining muscle mass.

Anonymous 76841

>Even if there's only 5% of men in that category, there must be hundreds of thousands of men who fit that profile.
in some arbitrary region around you? sure. and those hundreds of thousands are being chased by many millions of women in that same region. are you being obtuse or do you actually not see the problem?

Anonymous 76846

>I try to downplay my height by wearing flats
>hunching a bit
This is your your first mistake. Confidence is sexy. Scrotes love chasing women that don't give a shit about them in the first place. Also
>I am lanky
You're admitting in a self-hating way that you literally have a model body (in both height an build)? And you react by trying to hide it?
I'm about the same height as you, only an inch shorter, but I have a larger build. I live in a med country, so I'm above average male height. I wear heels by default because it suits best my style of clothing. Moids (especially the ones that are interesting in me or dating me) often have made comments when they saw me towering them with my platforms, but I just laugh it off. I just say I think these shoes look cool.
Maybe you should try to find clothing styles that you think look cool instead of making dressing choices centered about how scrotes will perceive you. I sometimes have the problem of finding stuff that is long enough for me, especially since I love j-fash, but I see it as a way to avoid to buy too much stuff, since a lot of it won't fit me.

>boys don't like tall girls because they look manly and dominating
Rofl, skinny tall girls don't look manly. Even if tall height for women isn't an "advantage" in terms of dating, it's not that important of a criteria for scrotes when it comes to dating. Besides, different people like different things, and I'm tired of people considering "averages" in terms of taste as the absolute norm.

Anonymous 76972

>I can't choose who I'm attracted to, I was born this way
I'm beginning to think this is bait, but I'll bite

Consider a man who is 5ft tall and struggling to find a relationship. When asked about it, he says that he has had opportunities to date women taller than him, but he rejected them. He states that he is simply not capable of being attracted to women taller than him and he was just born with that attraction.

Lets be honest, we both know that this man's lack of attraction for taller women has nothing to do with some birth-set desire for tiny people. He's rejecting them because they make him feel insecure/emasculated. Instead of coming to terms with his insecurities and being open-minded about the women he is attracted to, he has decided to stubbornly insist that he can only be attracted to a very tiny subset of women.

You're insecure about your height and you're allowing that insecurity to make you close-minded to potential partners.

Anonymous 76975

Not sure if bait either but I'll take you at face value.

Let me just say I relate. I'm not quite as tall as you but I was bullied over it all the time back in grade school and never was asked out. Short guys used to approach me just to make fun of my body. One time one joke asked me out (yeah he was like a half foot shorter than me and tbh I found him cute), I said yes, and it turned out his friends were video taping me and spread the video around. Turned out I looked like a complete idiot afterwards because I got SO excited at him asking me out and it turned out he was just doing a dare and called me an ugly giraffe.
And yeah, confidence didn't help change the way people treated me. I have been insulted dozens of times over my height pretty much exclusively by men irl and no I wasn't looking for the insults.

Also, I think people that get triggered at you wanting a guy taller than you are being absurd.
>>76972 is both trying to be politically correct, yet subtly being pretentious–"The desires you have are because of insecurity. Stop being insecure. You're lying to yourself. People aren't open to X thing because they are close-minded and are lying to themselves." As if this isn't in itself a close-minded sentiment that actively shits on your ability to make your own decisions about what you want. Is this person going to go around saying this shit to every 5"0 woman or girl that only dates guys taller than her? Probably not. But they certainly love to martyr 5"0 men for…some reason.

Keep in mind that incel adjacent men are obsessed with pressuring women into dating men they don't really like too - it's all about making women more accessible - so you'll hear a lot of this type of thing everywhere. When the time comes, you make your own decisions about what man you want or are able to love and be attracted to.

Moreover, the others were right about the "confidence" thing. Insecurity is bad in yourself, and in potential partners. Even if it didn't really change things for me I got a lot more comfortable with living life.

Anonymous 77011


I'm 5'9 (175cm) and I can relate to that. Men (young men) constantly neg me and remind me of my height at all times. When I was a teen working in factory they would bring a measuring tape to make fun of me. They'd literally never shut up about liking small girls, about how I'm taller than them and huge, etc. It was unbearable in a group, all of them coming up to me to compare, etc. It's been years since then and tbh I still think about it sometimes, how a group of men would constantly come up to me and gaslight me at work. I don't feel safe around men anymore, I always feel like I'm judged. I have many girl friends and if they ever mention my height, it's always in poditive context! I'm so insecure about my height nowadays because of that year when I was working in factory. I don't care about not being "dateable", it's whatever, but I just hate how moids pay attention to me and think cruel shit about me when I'm just going about my day! Men are so much more shallow, mean-spirited and judgemental than women.

Anonymous 77012

Also I forgot to add that anyone can reject someone for anything, and that rejection will always be valid. """Miners""" (clearly men) in this thread forget that attraction&constent are not something that can be forced or controlled. If a guy doesn't want to date me because I'm too tall, then so be it like??? I would feel gross about myself if I negged him to date me like this guy is trying to do>>76972
You aren't shallow for finding only certain people attractive, you are shallow if you let your genitalia control your behaviour by bullying others.

Anonymous 77019

You don't need validation from men. Also remember that scrotes would fuck anyone or anything if given the chance and that they're literally killing themselves over lack of sex, their attention isn't worth feeling like you do.


When manlets stop being aggressive, manipulative and so extremely insecure that they need to neg women for everything to make them feel worse than them, maybe you'll have an argument. Those women are based for making males seethe even more. If you can't see why they do it, you're probably male, blind to the fact that most men are trash but insecure moids like manlets are even worse.

Anonymous 77020

And for OP, if you're not a 10/10 supermodel in their eyes, men will insult you for anything (and even if you are, they would want to make you feel bad about yourself eventually in some way). For being too tall, too fat, too plain, wearing too much makeup, spending too much time on your hobbies. And of course scrotes usually want a short girlfriend, to feel taller than her because being the same height or shorter makes them feel less manly, and it's not your fault, it's the fault of their fragile masculinity. Men who don't care about that are rare.

Anonymous 77030

Lol @ that moid saying that women would be unable to make a compilation of men insulting women's characteristics. I could find a trillion tweets and 4chan posts about men making fun of women's labia ("looll roast beef amiright??1?") or their weight.

Anonymous 77033

What did >>77018 say? It got deleted before I could see.

Anonymous 77041

It was an obvious incel scrote who posted a compilation of responses by a bunch of based Stacie's to a single tweet by an account called "Heightism" or something like that.

Une Chienne Andalou 77329

>Lets be honest, we both know that this man's lack of attraction for taller women has nothing to do with some birth-set desire for tiny people. He's rejecting them because they make him feel insecure/emasculated.
I always found it amusing how so many people can recognize how the general moid preference for short women is rooted in insecurity. Such a “preference” is a result of social conditioning, and not innate, it’s also tied to the social construct of gender, namely masculinity. Yet these same people will swear on their life that the average woman’s preference for tall men is INNATE and fixed. I don’t get it, it’s crystal clear in my eyes that both are the result of social conditioning, neither are innate, and both are firmly rooted in insecurity, ultimately, insecurity about one’s identity as a “man”/“woman”. Men reject tall women because they find them intimidating and make them feel emasculated, likewise, women want a tall man because they want to feel small and feminine. My ideal partner is the same height as me (I’m 5’8” flat), but realistically I wouldn’t care if someone I liked was a few inches shorter or taller, I’ve liked both before. I don’t get how someone becomes so identified, so attached, to this “gender identity”. Men “need” to feel larger, women “need” to feel small. It’s all social conditioning and it’s all bullshit

Anonymous 77398

they want to cry and piss themselves about gender roles, the expectations associated with masculinity, but also don't want to let go of gender roles and actively shame and harass women who seek to abolish them. they're hopelessly stupid.

Anonymous 77405

Well the chances of a woman approaching a man is pretty low. So if either side feels like their height is a dealbreaker for most people that would dissuade them moreso. Guy thinks he's too short to approach and she thinks shes to tall. Its just how it is, the only insecurity from men is that they think girls only want taller guys. I dont think its so much that they dont like taller girls. Unless they have a bunch of options then maybe you could make an argument there. If youre a taller girl and find a shorter guy attractive you should just show interest.

Anonymous 77431

I think it is a stereotype that is largely true. Most women won't date a man shorter than them, so if you're 5'10, men below it will think you're going to reject them

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