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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent

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Anonymous 76997

I’m 18 and I can’t talk to other girls irl. Not in a tism way but in a way that we just never get each other and keep talking, super normies will write me off as funny but too quirky with my interests. I always get along with guys much more naturally. This has been happening noticeably the past three years and it’s not a situation that I’ve tried to cultivate, it just happened and the guys have almost always fully accepted me, to the point where my gender and differences are never brought up. Because of this I don’t often feel the pressure to make friends with girls. It took a while but they make no overly friendly advances towards me, it’s like heaven the way we can joke around about anything. I’ve never whored around and the only downside is my bf sometimes feeling anxious that I only ever talk to guys online and irl, but I always show him that I’m trustworthy. I’m heavily involved in a close knit irony community for a couple years now, I spent a lot of time in (but more so observing) 4chan trenches. It has completely complicated my humor and all my friends are outcasty, I feel like I couldn’t enjoy conversation with the casually funny, normal girl anymore. They all feel foreign to me, I’m never envious but I get anxious when I’m near a group of them. I want to have the natural companionship of funny, intelligent girl friends and there are rarely any in my online circles. Tips for talking to other girls and being more open to them? Or maybe some criticism on how I’m thinking about it?

Anonymous 76998

Find someone more like you I guess? If there's enough s to fill an entire crystal cafe them I'm sure there's some out there you can find. In a weird way stop chasing normies

Anonymous 76999

Don't worry about it too much. It's difficult to make friends at the best of times. People your age are also going to be very self-conscious and worried about in-groups, which doesn't help. There are heaps of 'edgy' and ironic girl communities out there, but they can be hard to find as they revolve around niche interests. What are your interests? If we know this, it might be easier to help.

Anonymous 77001

If you've already got friends you can trust then you're doing something right. High school is still fresh in my mind and it sucked mainly cause I wasn't on the same "wavelength" as other people. I know it's corny but don't put on a bunch of facades to attract friends, cause it doesn't work. Enjoy laughing and joking with ya mates, Anon

Anonymous 77004

I'm also 18 and have the same exact issue. I don't like having only guy friends because they rarely want to stay as just friends and begin to want something romantic from my experience. My bf also gets anxious at my amount of male friends and I realise if he was only friends with women I'd get a little anxious too.

I really wish I had more female friends especially around my age, I have no idea where to look especially because we no longer have a friendship finder thread here.
I've tried to make more friends with similar interests but most of my interests have a mostly male audience, meanwhile the female audience will either not speak good English or be too into tranny crap for me to think it's worth befriending them. I feel pretty lonely recently. I wish I had a small tight knit group of female friends.

Anonymous 77016

The reality is, most people are boring, 2-dimensional, and easy to predict.
Their political opinions will likely fit a predetermined tribe, with all of it's problems that they feel compelled to defend.
Their relationships will likely be exactly what you expect from someone of "normal" status.
Their hobbies will all consist of the same routines as each other with maybe something slightly different between them all, like going hiking instead of gardening.
People you are going to encounter out and about in the flesh are simple creatures enjoying their lives devoid of most problems like this, because simplicity can enjoy simplicity
It's unironically "just be yourself" and seek out the things that only interest you, it's prudent to first ask yourself how much of these feelings are genuinely intrinsic to you, and not just a product of outside expectations of you to be something you can't be.

Anonymous 77031

>we just never get each other and keep talking
I feel this but with both genders. The conversations are always shallow and I never "click" with anyone irl. I've only ever clicked with people online. Maybe I'd click with people if I were in a mental hospital or somewhere I knew there were other troubled people.

Anonymous 77036

Talk to them just like how you talk to the boys and stop thinking they are different from you.

Anonymous 77043


Anonymous 77044

Anonymous 77192

Same, but I can't even talk to girls online.
Or rather, I'm really craving for female friends so I try but they always eventually ghost me (have better friends, perhaps? or too busy with life?) or just do not make any effort to keep in touch whatsoever, despite me really doing my best to be good at social interaction and being genuinely interested. Some moids do that too, but there are so many who do stay in touch, I mean I have like 5 guy friends I talk to every day.
I've tried making friends with people on "meet people" sites and apps, and even on one imageboard friend finder but it just never works out, because either the above happens or we don't have any common interests we could talk about.
I'm suspecting I'm a bit of an aspie though, so that may have something to do with it (maybe I'm "creepy", rude or self-centered beyond reasonableness?)

Anonymous 77195

What are some of your interests anon?

Anonymous 77263

Typical sperg stuff: linux, computer science, math, I'm also a bit into ML, but it's not like I'm so one-dimensional that I only talk about these, could also discuss (on some, possibly not high, level?) philosophy, music, literature, etc, even politics as long as it's not just insults and polemics. Wouldn't want to derail this thread too much and make it all about me me me but I've filled a more detailed chart here if you're interested >>>/b/133755

Anonymous 77269

What you're describing has been my entire life experience. It never really changed I only ever had 1-2 female friends and they were dicey.

Anonymous 77286

I read your first post >>77192 and related to it, and saw the chart in /b/ and thought you'd be very cool to be friends with. We have somewhat similar interests (at least complementary).

Anonymous 77287

Thanks! I've got my email address written on the chart, so if you want to talk you can write me there (although I suspect that gmail and similar normie address providers make my emails go straight to spam; so, you'd have to be aware of that and check spam once in a while haha).

Anonymous 77527

This is a really good advice, i used to chase normies at 18 and wonder why im alone and have no girl friends

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