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At what age were you certain you didn't want kids? do you still feel the same way? Anonymous 16412

I have a common uterine deformity that makes pregnancy dangerous but not impossible. I don't want kids and now that abortion is illegal in my state, I'm thinking about getting my tubes tied. I don't have a boyfriend and haven't been sexually active in 3 years (incelita <3) so it's not a top priority right now.

I know I don't want kids or to get married. I just don't know if those thoughts are going to change in the future. My biggest goal right now is to live alone and experience life independently. Even if I get a bf I don't want him in my house lol. HOWEVER I was in love with a man when I was younger and that was the first time I started wanting kids. I wanted his DNA to live on because I loved him so much. Now those feelings are long gone, but I'm worried they'll come back in the future. I've heard horror stories about how depressed sterile women become when they want to have kids.

Is all the biological clock bullshit real? Should I hold off on sterilization till I'm older? How do I KNOW I won't ever want kids?

Anonymous 16413

How old are you? I was pretty sure by 18 that I didn't want kids and although at 34 sometimes I'll get thoughts like "Wouldn't it be nice to raise a mini me to have my morals?" I remember that children can be very different from their parents and that I'm having a rose colored glasses moment.
I think being secure in your decision to not children depends on why you're not having children. I abstained because I want to live longer, because birth is horrifically painful and I didn't want to go through it, and it would be selfish for someone of my financial position to bring a child into a dying planet where they will have to fight for basic needs.

Anonymous 16415

At 15 I didn’t want kids cause I wanted to kill myself and I still feel the same way.

Anonymous 16433

Knew from about 13 that I didn't want kids. I'm 32 now and still don't want them.

Anonymous 16449

Pretty recently because this world is so messed up and I couldn’t be able to handle and take care of a child financially or emotionally and it’d be an idiotic thing to do if I were to be selfish and still have one. You don’t have to sterilize yourself if you’re not sexually active or if you don’t actually want to since most doctors will just give you that talk about you being too young to be sterilized and how you might want it. Just be careful when you do eventually become active, you don’t want to get pregnant. Parenthood or wanting to be a parent will eventually come to you, or not it doesn’t matter. Honestly though OP, if you get older and decide you want kids I suggest you adopt or find a surrogate instead of having your own baby from your uterus since it’d be dangerous (though you probably know that).

Anonymous 16454

When I was younger I though that I would absolutely not want kids, then as I grew older the idea of raise a child that was half me and half the person I loved filled me with joy. Then I got into a relationship with a narcissist, fell deeply in "love" and still wanted kids, luckily he didn't, and would flipflop on it to keep me on the hook, after much bullshit I broke up, left with a broken heart, but I still really want kids and marriage. I don't know I guess that's just my reptilian brain or animal instincts, but I don't plan on fighting it, but I'm also somewhat in peace with the idea of not being able to find a good partner for it.

My advice is, wait a a few years, seek alternative options for birth control, don't have casual sex, I don't know why people would trust random moids to be clean and safe, and if after a while you feel the same go all for it.

Slightly off topic, but I remember a few years back some talk about moid pills that could produce a temporal blockage in their sperm tubes, like a vasectomy sort of, did something ever come of that?

Anonymous 16456

Moids couldn't handle the mild side effects (literally acne and mood swings) so it was shelved.

I did see recently they're working on another new one. Maybe it will get approved this time.

Anonymous 16465

As long as I can remember I've known I do not want kids. It's been a core part of my personality since I was a child.
I'm in my mid 20s now and I still don't want them- I see no future of mine with children in it. I have so many plans and ideas for my future that a child would never ever fit into. My husband got a vasectomy a little while back and it was such a relief to be over and done with worrying about it. No more struggling with BC, just totally free.

The way I see it, if you know you don't want kids now, just go and get sterilized. It'll cement it in your head. I believe the "biological clock" shit is a myth, and what it really is pertains to pressure from society and from family members. My husband's family asks every single time he talks to them when we are having children, and he just brushes it off and we laugh about it in private how it's never fucking happening.

So what if you start to regret it later? Fill the void with hobbies and pets and things to do- it's way worse to regret having a child. WTF are you supposed to do if you pop one out and resent it forever? Sounds worse than regretting sterilization in my 40's and rolling around in all of the money I saved due to my decision lul

Anonymous 16471

Same, I knew young (~14) and I'm in my thirties now.
Recently I've babysat for a few days (two kids, 4 and 7).
1/It was fun but exhausting.
2/I would have never done this if I had kids of my own.
3/It was enough: I got to briefly enjoy the day to day of having kids, I'm sure again I don't want any.
Like anything else: it has its charming side, but it's not for me. I got to see the void more clearly: these kids were bored, and I was keeping them busy. It was nonsensical, there was no point to it except keeping them busy while they grow enough to keep themselves busy.

Anonymous 16493

I was certain ever since childhood.

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