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D E V I L I S H T H R E A D Anonymous 115101
>be me
>at uni, 20 years old
>sperg with no friends in class
>have primitive art course
>professor keeps referencing and praising a specific book on the subject
>term paper is due in december
>borrow the only copy of said book at uni library in october
>don't tell anyone, take my time writing my paper
>fast forward to december
>normies complaining on class fb group about the book copy being missing
>be delighted
>get maximum grade, everyone else fails
>mfw
Anonymous 115104
>>115101maybe this thread can be a naughty-things-you-did general thread.
anyway, devilnon, there's no way none of them were entirely incapable of procuring any other copy within 2 months.
Anonymous 115109
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>be me
>elementary
>spot this kid has pokemon cards and is showing off
>recess time
>leaves his cards on his desk
>go over and rip them apart with no one watching
>recess over
>he comes back and looks in pure horror at his pokemon cards and starts crying
>mfw trying to hide a snicker
Anonymous 115737
artworks-000128767…
>be me
>take a random girls pictures of the internet
>set up a tinder profile
>talk to people
>get their hopes up
>unmatch them
Anonymous 117156
>>115737you are a retard
>>115101they should have just used libgen..
Anonymous 117157
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>>115109>someone has nice things>NOT ON MY WATCHfor what purpose?
Anonymous 117158
>>115109this just makes me sad for the other kid
Anonymous 117160
Story from a friend of mine
>have professor that's always late with grading papers
>remember turning in something I wasn't really that proud of at the end of last semester
>"great paper, wonderful diction. This is truly a joy to read! A+"
>hmmmmmmmmmm
>this semester, have him for a different class
>still late with grading papers
>hehe now's my chance
>don't want to do final essay, kind of on/off feeling about the subject, plus I have other final essays to dedicate time to
>turn in some absolute bullshit on the last day for it
>he grades it 1 day later
>"This research project is of outstanding quality in all respects. Very impressed in how you improved upon your first draft, A+"
>had never even turned in a first draf
They have him again next semester and they're gonna try it for a third time apparently
Anonymous 117168
>>117156It's not always efficient depending on the language of said book
Anonymous 117270
>>117185Nothing ever happens, everything is a lie
Anonymous 117276
>>115109I knew a girl who did that once, but it was yugi o cards I think. The boy cried but also punched her lol.
Anonymous 117277
>>117160Lmfao based professor. I hope your friend isn’t in med school though
Anonymous 117318
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>kindergarten
>class is saying the Pledge of Allegiance
>retard kid is barking instead of saying the words
>tell on him
>he gets sent to the principal's office
Anonymous 117319
>>117318LOL that just reminded me that back in elementary school if you got in trouble in kindergarten you got sent to the "land of no friends"
I still find it equally horrifying and hilarious that's what they called it
Anonymous 117360
>get candy from the bulk section at the grocery store ($6.48/lb)
>Self-checkout
>Ring it up as bananas (.49c/lb)
>Get chocolate malt balls for next to nothing
>Go to discount health-food store
>There is no BIN system, everything is priced with stickers from a label maker
>Cashier just enters in the price and the register adds it up, there is no scanning involved
>Take stickers from cheaper things and place them over the original sticker
>Discounted discount food
I am ungovernable.
Anonymous 117366
>>117360You mean 'I am criminal'
It's sneakier than just grabbing a pair of Nikes and running out the door, Ill give you that. but when you steal, the store raises prices to cover the loss.
no, they won't miss it if you do it once, but add the next pilferer, and the next cheater, and now they have to raise prices. You have to know someone else eventually paid for your candy, even if you didn't.
Anonymous 117388
>>117366>she pays for toilet paper>she doesn't steal it from malls or the workplaceNgmi
Anonymous 117389
>>117366If I actually cared I wouldn't do it.
Inflation went up almost 10% this year alone, while I still have to work the same grueling hours for the same shit hourly wage. Don't talk to me about rising prices because they've already risen and that's why I do this
Anonymous 117404
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>>117388In spite of the phrase “be a man, use your hand,” I oblige just to prove ladies can too. Tell me now whose not gonna make it
Anonymous 117406
>>117366The system is rigged against working people. How can you expect us to not cheat, when rich fucks have it so easy just for being born in at the right time in the right place?
Anonymous 117452
>>117360Some people are just fearless.
Anonymous 117469
>>117366Accountant here
Literally nobody ever raises prices due to theft. Every retail business I've ever worked with is insured for loss due to theft.
Also no business ever lowers prices when they have a low theft year, I wonder why that is.
Anonymous 117596
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When you feel like cutting yourself, key a rich person's car instead
When you feel like venting to Samaritans, find somebody who does something evil for money's phone number on Google and give them a piece of your mind
Anonymous 117598
>in school
>poor as dirt
>hang out with boys
>everyone's playing Pokemon, Yugioh and beyblades, sometimes for money, cards and beyblades
>someone leaves their deck out during lunch
>steal it and intentionally get in trouble for saying rude words
>gent sent to admin office for time out
>watch the receptionist work the copier
>wait until lunch
>colour photocopy the best cards
>spend T&E class cutting them out and gluing them to my crappy cards, then putting them in sleeves
>return the stolen cards
>come back the next day and play for keeps
>sell the cards I won
>go to an arcade on Fridays and cheat at games
>find lost/discarded money cards
>sell the tickets and cards at school
>talk to the cool kids who tell me about Chinese sellers at the local market
>beg my mum to take me on the weekend
>lie that I just want to save money by vuying a big bag of oranges, and instead buy stacks of knock-off Chinese trading cards for cheap
>sell them at school
>end up selling them to high school kids
>those kids end up hanging around us on the weekend
>play beyblades for bets
>buy a Chinese knockoff beyblade made with a steel core and sharp blades
>put insects in the ring and whoever kills them gets money
>utterly destroy everyone with superior momentum
>walk away with cool things like a pellet gun and fireworks
>one autistic kid realises the cards I sell are fakes
>the entire scheme unravels as everyone snitches on me
>my mum finds the box full of $1 and $2 coins, contraband and lollies under my bed
>tells me I'll go to hell and burn forever
>takes all my money and buys herself new clothes
Truly devilish.
Anonymous 117618
>>117598with initiative like that you better be rich anon
or in jail
idk
Anonymous 118372
lmao hope they never find out but please don't do it again queen
Anonymous 118548
>17ish
>Bullied by some fat bitch for wearing glasses and having a heavy gait thanks to leg surgery
>Bitch would embarrass me by mimicking how I walk down the hall
>She even started slinging her bag at my feet whenever she saw me to make me trip
>She was an asshole to everyone, and would regularly throw peoples shit out of windows for laughs etc.
>Decide to get payback
>Purposely hover around her locker to see her combination (16,3,12,5,10)
>After a few successful tests, start pissing into party balloons using a funnel
>Start drinking lots of coffee and eating LOTS of asparagus, insisted we have it for dinner every night, piled high even though I hate it, and purposely dehydrating myself and going for runs after dinner so that the pre-bed time/post-shower piss is yellow and smelly.
>After I'd amassed around 30 extremely full and easily popped balloons of piss. put them in a box and took them to school, hid them in the bottom of my locker.
>Waited until after school and everyone had left
>Filled the top of her locker with the balloons and put her binders under them to make a slant
>Took the next day off school, claimed I was sick with cramps and nausea
>Around 10am my friend sends me a facebook link to a video of her freaking out surrounded by burst balloons and piss
>"piss-girl" lasted about 3 weeks before transferring out.
Anonymous 118878
>be in preschool
>bullied by the bitch who sits in front of me since day one
>she'd do fucked up shit like flash her pussy at me
>locks myself in bathroom for hours after school
>self-harm by biting my arm really hard till it bled and had deep marks
>light bulb moment
>act traumatised to everyone telling them she bit me
>parents, teachers and all her friends thinks she abused me
>teacher slaps the shit out of her in front of the whole class
>her cool friends dump her and become my friends
>we bullied the shit out of her until graduation day
never not stand up to bullies
Anonymous 118882
>>118878She didn’t deserve that. I also did cruel shit to other kids as a child though so I don’t think I’m better than you lol.
Anonymous 119136
>>118548What a queen, I would feel proud of that for the rest of my life. I wish I had stood up for myself instead of trying to be ‘the better woman’.
Anonymous 119404
>>119136>I wish I had stood up for myself instead of trying to be ‘the better woman’.NTA but for me it was partly that and partly because I was quiet and shy back then, way too much, and hated confrontation.
Anyway, there was this one kid in middle school who hanged out with the dumb funny guys. I liked to be around the guys (yes, I was kind of a NLOG sorry) and laugh at the stupid shit they did and said and their banter, although I clearly never participated so the guys wouldn't cross that line with me. However, this fucking manlet would tell me very vulgar dirty jokes and generally annoy me whenever he happened to be around me, even though I clearly didn't find it funny.
But one day when he was doing that during class to the point that I couldn't even focus on the lesson, I kinda snapped and grabbed that annoying little shit by the collar with one hand (I was taller than him kek) and prepared my other fist to punch his face. I still remember the terrified expression he made lol.
However, as I was looking at him, my nature made me immediately realize that everybody was watching so I stopped and sat back down because I'm a coward and also didn't wanna get in trouble. No one said a word. Also he went back to annoying the fuck outta me as soon as that was over.
but god, I felt so powerful at that moment Anonymous 120506
>>115101
>in middle + highschool>have given up saying "excuse me" and trying to squeeze by in crowded hallways, especially when a pack of idiots stand in the middle>grab moids by their backpacks and push them out of my wayI've gotten my fair share of looks and "excuse you?"s but its worth it. gtfo of my way.