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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

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Anonymous Admin 49939[Reply]

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Screenshot 2024-11…

Just one more year. What should I do? Anonymous 126476[Reply]

I'm stuck in a weird position.
When I newly turned 17, I met with a 30 year old guy from 4chan because I was lonely and wanted a friend. We had some common interests in games. We hung out at the arcade and in the same year, I went to his house to play co-op. However, the friendship was short lived as he asked me to be his girlfriend right after. I was young and stupid, I saw no issue with him. He was unfit and never had a girlfriend before, I never had a boyfriend before. So I thought I should give him a chance.
It's been 1 and a 1/2 years now. Due to feeling unsafe at home, as soon as I turned 18, I moved out to this dude's house. He said he'd support me. So I moved and enrolled to a highschool near his house.
Over time, living with him, I began to pick up on things that do not sit right with me.
Firstly, he has figurines of some anime girls that troubled me from the very first time I came over, but I thought I should just overlook it. Figurines of miku, vtubers and Fate characters. He has plushes of vtubers, his profile picture is a vtuber. He admits that he likes vtubers but doesn't watch them anymore. Yet when I criticise them for milking money from men he opposed me.
Things that disgust me include him loving the anime 'yuru yuri' a show common among lolicons, loving the soundtrack of 'yuru yuri', he downloaded all of them and calling the government 'woke' because the age for marriage is 18. Other than this, I told him I do not use twitter, but everyday, I check what he has posted and who he recently follows. When I checked his following for the first time, I burst into tears. It was anime porn artist after anime porn artists. Most of his following was that. Yet checking his recently followed, he still actively interacts with these anime porn artists. When he shows me something on twitter, he's very wary and cautious of ever scrolling too much, and when he accidently does - it's all vtubers and ecchi drawings of anime girls. Last night, I checked his following again, and I cried again discovering he followed 20 more disgusting anime artists.
The worst thing is, these anime porn artists also draw porn of underage characters… in other words loli. It's a trend I've noticed across the artists he indulges in.
I feel so stupid, I was too young and dumb to notice this before I lived with him. And now I'm stuck with this borderline pedophile. I should've picked it up when I told him my real age and he said "15 is legal anPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

Anonymous 126478

>>126476
>Yuru
Loser or not, if he were a threat to real children he'd be watching mitsudomoe and murder drones

Anonymous 126479

I'm sorry but I don't understand. How can you know all this about him and still let him touch you without literally throwing up. I'm not even judging, I just don't get it.


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Jealousy thread Anonymous 126198[Reply]

I'm a very jealous person, so much that seeing prettier women than me can affect my mood. I wondered if this was a common thing here, what and who makes you jealous?
11 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126295

Only thing that'll make me jealous is if someone has more money then me or a attractive moid that I want.

Both are easily fixable by locking in and shaping up to be the kind of woman to attract either or both things.

Anonymous 126296

I'm jealous of girls with clear skin, especially really fat girls who eat like shit. I cut out so much of my diet (white carbs, dairy, I eat minimal sugar and fats), bought so many skincare products but my face is still acne riddled.

I'm jealous specifically of fat girls with a ton of potential because even though I've basically done all I could to improve my appearance esp. with diet and fitness my highest potential is ugly while all they have to do is literally put in like half the work I do to be a 10/10.

Anonymous 126384

i’ve never felt jealous of another woman.

Anonymous 126388

03.jpeg

Damn imagine wasting your time thinking about how pretty you are in relation to other women.

You know what's so much more interesting than that, look at this awesome bowl of oyster dipping noodles.

Anonymous 126477

>>126198
My philosophy prevents me from caring about people's husk and start critically analysing the way they speak and think instead.


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Anonymous 126416[Reply]

I found the best man ever and I started dating him and we get along so well together and my life has improved in so many ways since meeting him, but for some reason I'm not falling in love with him.

He can tell that I don't have strong feelings for him, and it's important to him that a girlfriend does. He talked about how betrayed he felt by a past girlfriend that was with him just to not be alone. I don't feel like I'm settling for him, my brain just doesn't produce the correct feelings that I need to have.

Why does life have to be this way? Am I broken? Asexual? I'm just going to be single for the rest of my life the way this is going and it's making me feel very anxious and sad.
7 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126450

>>126426
Had something similar happen. He was an objectively good person, we had fun, we shared interests, his family was nice and kind, he never pressured me to do stuff I didn't want to, etc. his only "problem" was that he wasn't really good at listening or offering emotional support when things were bad (like when one of my cats died he just went "oh…" or something), but other than that he was a kind man. I liked him and all but I didn't love him, I remember hugging him on our second date and thinking "is this it? is this what love is supposed to feel like? cause it's so… empty". I really, really tried, when together with friends I'd try to look at him from afar, try to see him in a new light that'd make me truly fall in love (like "well, I guess he looks kinda cute, and his hair is clean and nice, and he has a cute smile, I guess???), or when he wore new clothes, or whenever he helped me with something, or gifted me a cute plushie of my favorite animal, I don't know, anything, but it didn't happen. Even the idea of having sex with him repulsed me, like I had no problem doing other stuff but the idea of actual PIV made me recoil, so we never did. For a long, LONG time I thought I was asexual and that I was the broken one, that I'd grow out of it and start loving him and we would be happy and all, but it just wouldn't happen, on the contrary, something just never fully clicked. I liked hanging out with him but it wasn't exciting, I didn't really look forward to it, and the more we were together the more I wanted to find excuses to not see him because I didn't want to bother thinking of how to fill all that time. It came to a point where I kept thinking I just wanted to go home already whenever we did see each other, and eventually I didn't really feel much when kissing him either. Another thing I noticed is that I never felt truly free to be myself with him, often thought "shouldn't I feel like I can be myself the same way I can when I'm with my friends? isn't a boyfriend like higher in the ladder, and if anything he's the man I should be the most comfortable and open with? then why can't I?" as well as realizing that if I loved him I would have very much wanted to fuck him, but I didn't. It's like I knew he wasn't "the one".

Covid came, it gave me the perfect excuse to not see him, but I realized that even if we were apart it was cruPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

Anonymous 126455

>>126427
If there's no romantic or sexual feelings, it is no different from a good friendship. The sexual incompatibility in particular is an issue.
>>126431
Not rude . Honestly I think my situation is very unique, though I suppose everyone thinks their situation is unique. We met when I was 18 and he 25, online. I was living in a very bad situation at the time. I was living with my dad (I have no mom), who was a hoarder and the house was pretty much decaying in many ways. I couldn't find a job (living in a rural area) and we couldn't afford much food. I was desperate to get out asap. Then I meet my husband, we get married when I turn 19. We get married because he lived in a different country and many times the only way to resolve an international LDR is through marriage. I wanted a stable place to live. I wanted food. But at the time, being naive, I really didn't think I was just using my husband for that. Sure I didn't find him that attractive, but I just admonished myself for that, thinking of myself as shallow for caring about physical appearance and that all issues would get fixed with time if we just worked on them together. Honestly, that's not true. Some issues are simply fundamental and cannot be changed even if you both genuinely care for each other so much and try your hardest.

I saw a good future with him and I felt like he was my only chance at a good life. He treats me well even. Now I'm 22 and we've been living together for about a year. I can't go back home to my dad, he has completely disowned me (not because of the marriage, he just wanted nothing to do with me when I turned 18). It's all just fucked really. I am so ashamed of myself and I feel great shame even typing this out on an anonymous imageboard. I blame my dad most of all and then I blame myself. The guilt and regret has caused me a delibitating amount of self-hatred. Basically, I think I was just in a pretty desperate situation and along my husband comes like the fairy godmother from Cinderella or some shit. I am a serious failure. Which would be fine enough if I was suffering by myself, but I feel like I've accidentally dragged another person down with me and ruined his life, although I never meant to and I never ever want to hurt him.
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

Anonymous 126461

>>126455
Letting this fester will only hurt you both in the long run.
You've been faithful and tried your best as a wife, but it sounds like it's time to book a talk with him about how things really started and where you stand now.
22 and ~28 respectively isn’t too old to start over. You can be grateful to him, he can be kind, but you don’t have to stay trapped together just because you’re both “good people.”
The alternative is trying to bunker down for another decade until you’re both too emotionally exhausted and morally compromised to leave. A clean, compassionate break might be the more forgiving choice for you both

Anonymous 126474

342.png

>>126417
I'm not latina

>>126450
>>126455
I feel like I can be myself around him, though we haven't known each other that long.

We haven't had sex but I can imagine myself hating that if it doesn't work out. Every other worry I've had has melted away the more I've gotten to known him, though.

Thanks for sharing your experiences, noonas. I still desperately wish I could try this anyway, but whatever happens I think I'm at least going to tell him what I feel, that way it's not just me deciding what to do but us together. If I'm lucky maybe he will offer his friendship instead and that will make me less lonely somehow.

Anonymous 126475

For me, sometimes observing my own feelings is like observing something with a microscope that is too small, that gets damaged by beams of light. If you are this way, and you haven't known each other for that long, then maybe you can just wait. Time and silence is sometimes all it takes for your inner thoughts to speak up. This is especially true if you've never been attracted to somebody in a long-term way before, you very well could just be slow to discern what you want. But if this is the case, then maybe try not to move forward (esp physically) until you can discern, as that would only increase mental noise and make it harder to figure out.

Also, are you like this in all other areas in life? Ex: if you adopt an animal, move, make new friends, change jobs/career ambitions/school concentrations, do you start worrying about your choices the same way you are with your boyfriend?


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Vent Thread Anonymous 125413[Reply]

I don't even know what number we're on

Previous thread >>>/feels/120288
174 posts and 29 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126418

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I may have, slightly, just a little bit, ruined my life. As such I think the only thing I can do to fix it is to become one of those 30+ degree getters, because the alternative, in terms of employment, is so bad I think I'm going to actually kill myself. Despite the drawing of Jar Jar Binks I've attached to this post, I really do mean it. It's either care work or retail hell. I can't even claim to have wasted my twenties in a worthy way. It was just ceaseless NEETism/breadline employment. There was a bit at the start where I almost started a degree, but it didn't pan out.

If it's a degree in something boring it will be less embarassing that I'm so old.

Anonymous 126419

>>126418
Don't believe the lie that money doesn't grow on trees

Anonymous 126420

>>126418
bite the bullet and go back to uni or get a certificate. become an dental hygienist or some sort of hospital tech role, or go an admin route. ive met so many old people in uni, its pretty normal enough. a bunch of teenagers/young twenties aint gonna be thinking about you at all, why would they think about you compared to some other twenty year old? id say go the community college route for a certificate that sounds interesting to you, unless you got a death wish

Anonymous 126457

>>126418
Same tbh, nothing else but to suck it up and commit

>>126419
The black walnut route? The w33d route?

Anonymous 126473

>>126457
>The black walnut route? The w33d route?

Wtf no, start gardening or plant something and experience a bit of freedom

Dough that might work too I guess


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Unsent Letter Thread Anonymous 115657[Reply]

Previous Thread >>2119
420 posts and 27 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126466

IMG_1321.png

janelle wilkins will tell you you’re just jealous of her and bitter over a bad hookup if you try to warn her about her partner being a rapist. then she’ll make fan art. janelle wilkins looks like this and is missing several teeth because she paid for a dog suit with holes in it instead of dental care.

Anonymous 126467

>>126466
hey nikolas parent do you think maybe you should get treated for gum disease or nah. like everyone take a moment and zoom in.

Anonymous 126468

wow thanks for the medical gaslighting today bitch. I guess every other doctor was wrong, my vitamin d levels at 12 ng ml is actually normal, my analyses that literally prove my condition are something else, and if nobody witnessed my symptoms they aren't legitimate, and if they didn't witness them right it didn't count. but you still prescribed the actual real meds anyway. I can't believe I paid for this shit.

Anonymous 126469

>>126468
make a thread for this dr on lolcow. listen to the demons. it will feel good.

Anonymous 126472

>>126466
nikolas parent and janelle wilkins consume child porn


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Anonymous 125902[Reply]

I'm 39 weeks pregnant. I was out for a formal reason, related to my documents. While I was gone (about 4 hours), my boyfriend managed to buy a liter bottle of vodka and drink, like, a third of it, maybe even closer to half. He apologized, but I don't know what to do. Total irresponsibility from him. On top of that, he doesn't want me to get an education or work, and I haven't had the chance to go outside or see doctors because he doesn't like it. I think I've only left the house about 7 times during the pregnancy. If I threaten to leave, he threatens suicide. He has history of suicidal behaviour. I don't know what to do. I can't leave the cat, but seems like it's already over. My bf had issues with alcohol and other substances before, like a year ago.
5 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 125908

>>125902
>he doesn't want me to get an education or work, and I haven't had the chance to go outside or see doctors because he doesn't like it
Kill him.
>my boyfriend is a drug addict
If he blames his bad behaviour on any drugs he takes, he's still responsible for his bad behaviour, don't forget.
>he doesn't want me to get an education or work
Why? There could not be a flag redder than this. This is third world woman slavery level of controlling abuse.
>I can't see the doctor
You know, if you kill him, it's basically self-defence. Not just because of this particular red flag, but it's quite a glaring one, innit?
>he doesn't like it
Why? Because he doesn't like you seeing other people who could remind you that there's a whole world out there where you could be free and away from him? Are you literally his prisoner?
>I think I've only left the house about 7 times during the pregnancy. If I threaten to leave, he threatens
Yeah, he's definitely keeping you prisoner. Trying to brainwash you that this is normal and that if he can't keep you confined and submissive, he'll literally die, that's normal for a certain type of abuser. He's full of shit, he won't kill himself and if he does, is that so bad…?
>he threatens suicide
Unfortunately, he likely won't do it himself. My dad was like this too, always threatening to kill himself and that fucker never did, despite all the times he cut himself (shallow cuts) and took various drugs (also vodka, but also more illegal drugs and weed). When I was living with him and brainwashed by living with him for more than 15 years (you can't help having empathy for someone you live with for this long, especially if your safety depends on their mood, it's instinctual to feel like you need to care for them like a servant) I was so worried about him, like the so goodhearted teenager I was. But no, he did not kill himself, even decades later. If he had, I'd have gotten through that though. You and your babys safety are 1000x more important than your abusers fragile psyche and also his psyche is neither your fault nor even your responsibility! You are NOT responsible for this grown aPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

Anonymous 125909

>>125902
>>125908
Sorry, that post was way too long…
Please work on getting away, it's not safe to stay with someone like that… What country are you from? Is there anyone you can reach out to? Anyone trustworthy? Anyone at all?

Anonymous 125910

>>125902
If you live in the US then call nearby women’s shelters, community resources, planned parenthood, anything. You’re being abused and falsely imprisoned and they can give you resources and guidance to get out.

Anonymous 125914

>>125902
was this baby planned/wanted? are you in your country legally/have citizenship?
Either way-your boyfriend is setting you up for abuse via babytrapping. you need to leave. it does not matter if he offs himself and it is not your fault because it’s his planned choice. threatening suicide is literally an abuse tactic. not letting you see a doctor is abusive because that’s extremely dangerous to your health. Take the cat outside, cats have survival instincts and can fend for themselves. You and your baby are more important.
Collect all of your evidence to be used in court against him potentially make sure you have things to identify yourself.
Does your family or friends know about this? Try and see if you can stay with them.
Block him everywhere and if he comes back with his bullshit you have to take him to court.
It’s not love to block your wife and future child from medical care. He cannot support you and values drugs more than you. This man is garbage

Anonymous 126471

you need to get that thing sucked out of you


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i have a phobia of female role in sex which makes me dysphoric as fuck and sex repulsed Anonymous 126444[Reply]

anyone else??? i just find the role submissive and humuliating, i dont wanna post it on nsfw board bc i dont wanna see anons talk about wanting to do humiliating sex acts i have a phobia of

Anonymous 126449

I'm exactly the same nona. Besides the dysphoric part. It just feels like people trying to pigeonhole you somewhere before you even tell them if you are interested or not.

Anonymous 126470

you’re not dysphoric you are having a normal reaction to being under the constant threat of sexual assault and being expected to allow this to happen to you and smile sweetly. you need to start harming men.


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frustrated Anonymous 126270[Reply]

maybe i'm in the wrong here but my female friends who have boyfriends just make me so incredibly angry.
they just make me so frustrated because they'll say things like 'oh i hate men' and then turn around and tolerate their useless male partners because somehow they are the exception. (???) i dont understand it.
every heterosexual relationship i've ever witnessed in my life is a genuine fucking horror story!!!!
i dont know. i just hate that my friends willingly give their lives to retarded insecure men who genuinely dont care about them at all. like wake up!
sorry i just had to get that off my chest hahaha
20 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126453

>>126445
Don’t worry I don’t either. They have to be stupid bc why willingly date one of Those things

Anonymous 126456

>>126445
You aren't supposed to drink your own kool-aid.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drinking_the_Kool-Aid
See this post >>126453 she could be having a bf right now.

Anonymous 126462

>>126456
> she could be having a bf right now.
Idk what u think u know about me but I do not have one and would never wish to have one lol

Anonymous 126463

>>126462
Cool, now stop making everything about yourself, i was only using you as example.

Anonymous 126464

>>126463
> i was only using you as example.
Which is exactly why I said something abt it dumbass lmfao so sorry I'm apparently making everything about myself

Besides there was literally nothing wrong w/ what the other anon said so idk what ur issue is


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I got ghosted by a close friend Anonymous 126434[Reply]

And i need advice, so i met her a year ago on lolcow in a blackpill groupchat, we got along really well and got raelly close. we spoke for 4h+ hours a day with no breaks for ten months straight. then she ghosted me without a word at the end of may and came back month later bc she saw on my reddit that im about to kill myslef. then she told me she will stay only temporarily. then left three months ago again WITHOUT A WORD. i really care about her, we never had any argumetns. our conversations would always flow perfectly and she never acted distant before in a relation with me.
her explanation after she left me for the first time was that she's not made for close bonds with anyone. this broke my heart. i told her i love her but she had no reaction to it.
i spoke with psychics about the the past months to find out why she left me and will she come back and they all tell me that
- shes going throught something
- shes depressed
- she will come back, many said in november she will be back
- she misses me but she is focusing on herself right now and her own head
in the comments i will also post what i catched her say about me on lolcow one time and you guys can tell me what you think about it.
soo what should i do? i wished her happy birthday a month ago even tho she doesnt respond to me on discord. should i keep messaging her or wait for her to come to me? how should i behave when she comes back? should i be my ecstatic authentic self with her and be happy that shes back and act like before or should i hold back? does she even like me??? i feel like i cant live without her and i miss her so much. i feel for her so strongly
9 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126446

>>126443
I don't think a person that can't woman up and communicate with you directly and maturely is good for you. It's not a situation where you're getting treated with respect you deserve. I bet your relationship had been developing very rapidly and intensely, hadn't it?

Anonymous 126447

>>126446
it happened like slowly naturally over time we connected, she would always respond to me in the groupchats and validate me and was genuinely interested in me so we spoke and spoke and spoke and i got attached to her and she told be she was invested in the friendship for ten months. idk why later on she stopped, she didnt tell me why.

Anonymous 126448

>>126447
and nothing bad happened between us. i was so devastated when she ghosted, i was vulnerable and spoke with psychics out of desperation. im autistic and highly sensitive so it was all hard for me to take

Anonymous 126458

i feel like shes my only true soulmate

Anonymous 126459

>>126434
>>126437
>>126443
Regardless of the post being her or not, the type still seems obvious. She's a blackpill doomer who doesn’t feel worthy of your time or attention. Internalized shame, self-reproach, and a sense of being underhanded or unworthy mean she’ll inevitably ghost. It's a tactical retreat to avoid being perceived. A face-saving measure, by preempting rejection and sparing both of you the painful memory of having to play it out.
Be assured, she values you enough to care that much.

I can relate, but I never let things reach the Discord-buddy or 1-on-1 stage, just to avoid disappointing people. Maybe you two could stay at a comfortable distance as anonymous imageboard friends? The Altchan userbase is small enough that "relationships" like that can linger


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