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Sons or Daughters Anonymous 216037

Which would you prefer?
I could see pros and cons for both.

Anonymous 216038

This question runs into John Rawls' "Veil of Ignorance." Rawls' solution to the Veil of Ignorance is that one should attempt to aim for the highest minimum, rather than the highest maximum or even median. Under both options the question becomes "what is the worst that could happen."

The worst possible daughter seems infinitely better than the worst possible son.

Anonymous 216039

That's an awfully negative way of thinking… Would your answer be the same if you were looking at averages or best possible outcomes?

Anonymous 216043

Daughters, but that's primarily because my only experience with boys is my own son who was, sadly, born without any survival instinct. He causes me moments of sheer terror almost daily as he immediately gives into monkey instincts to climb tall things, go as fast as is physically possible and is fascinated by anything flammable.

Anonymous 216044

I'd prefer a daughter, but it seems like in general sons are a bit lower maintenance, can do chores, and offer security in their older years. But it also seems like if your son was violent, it would be really scary. Just thinking about a 16 year old who is a foot taller than me, yelling at me that I can't legally kick out of my house freaks me out.

Anonymous 216050

The happiest men seem far happier than the happiest women, the most financially or sexually successful likewise.

However the median male seems distinctly inferior to the median daughter. This is reflected even in a simple, lazy examination of college admissions rates.

Anonymous 216052

Having a football captain, good grade, obedient son seems like a much different experience than 350lb neckbeard reddit user. How do you even prevent the ladder? Is it just fate?

Anonymous 216053

>Having a football captain, good grade, obedient son
I'm sorry nona but you're going to need to pick 2 out of those 3 at most. If he's smart and strong he's going to raise hell.

Anonymous 216055

Whenever I'd interact with boys going to private schools, they seemed to fit into those categories. Maybe having all three requires having lots of money.

Anonymous 216057

I would be very happy with either option. I am not picky, but I really do want a son. I keep having dreams where I am very old, on a porch and there is a little boy in my lap with dark features and curly hair like the prettiest doll. It makes me want to cry when I wake up. I know that sounds idealistic and actually having children is different from your dreams, but I want it so bad :(
But I would equally love a girl. I would like to teach her how to care for animals and ride horses etc. She would be so cute.

Anonymous 216075

It's inherently immoral to bring male life into the world.

Anonymous 216077

Daughters, part of why I don't think I'm anywhere near mature enough for kids is that I genuinely just… don't want a son. I imagine myself as a parent quite often but it's always this vision of having a girl and replicating the dynamic I had with my own mom

Anonymous 216082


>d there is a little boy in my lap with dark features and curly hair like the prettiest doll.
I noticed that men treat children as part of their "legacy" while women think of them as cute little accessories, both are bad imo. Do you never think that you're bringing an entire person with consciousness into the world?

Anonymous 216098

If I ever get pregnant I’ll be having either a daughter or an abortion

Anonymous 216108

>can do chores
I'd choose a daughter. I have a job where a lot of customers come in with kids. The daughters are always so kind to their mothers and help out, even if they are three years old they will still try to help their mommies bag their groceries. The sons are hit or miss, they either stand there holding a Fortnite gift card their mom buys for them or they lie in the basket of the shopping cart despite being old enough to walk and talk. Only one boy seemed polite and he was wearing a school uniform and did not complain when his mom asked him to go get some cream cheese. Usually older (teenage) boys will help their mothers, but anything younger than that and they usually just stand there and watch their mom do everything. Though sometimes a daughter will be filming tiktoks instead of helping, but this is much more rare. Easy solution is to not let your child have a tiktok (the girls are like 10)

Anonymous 216116

This but ideally I should not reproduce because I would be an abusive mother.

Anonymous 216195

I would prefer mostly daughters but wouldn't mind having a son. I'd like my firstborn at least to be female.

Anonymous 216204

>How do you even prevent the ladder?
Instill good habits into them at an early age. Provide them an appreciation (not infatuation) with food and proper nutrition. Allow them exercise every day and opportunities to go outside (as simple as registering them for a sport). Let them have opportunities to interact with peers. Be strict, but not overbearing, with electronics, especially as they become older.
This needn't be said but this isn't 100% foolproof; you can only nurture someone for so long before nature takes its turn. But I will say from experience that encouraging good habits in young children will provide them with the tools necessary for a fulfilling life in adulthood

Anonymous 216219

It's right there in my reply duh.
>I know that sounds idealistic and actually having children is different from your dreams
The entire question of whether you prefer a girl or a boy is pretty objectifying to begin with. You should be ready to support your child regardless. When you ask "do you never think you're bringing a bringing an entire person with consciousness into the world?" The answer is no because I'm not shooting out kids on the reg.I was just talking about my unconscious thoughts, dreams I couldn't even control, but it's not reality. I'm actually putting off children until way later on in my life as well so I can plan properly because I know it's another human life. But it's pretty easy to assume things of comments from anonymous people.

Anonymous 216221

I mean like carrying stuff and mowing the lawn type stuff. I usually only see grown moids and boys doing stuff like that. I'd like a house with a yard oe day, but I'm not pushing a lawnmower around all day or shoveling snow.

If your first born is a son, you could use him to beat up moids trying to get with your daughters.

I hear contact sports (Wrestling, Football, other marital arts) and a physically imposing… father help to sons to control their strength. Its like when kittens and puppies fight each other. They learn boundaries.

Anonymous 216241

Not sure if I would bring a girl to this world

Anonymous 216258

I always imagined myself having a girl but I guess I wouldn’t mind a boy.

My family is riddled with mental problems, addiction stuff and autism anyway so the kid is gonna have some issues either way.

Anonymous 216262

daughters by far. i wouldn't want to deal with male puberty as i obviously have no connection to that experience and i think i'd be awkward with it. i know my daughter would be a complete nightmare like me during puberty though but maybe i'd be able to handle it better than my own mother kek

Anonymous 216299

Daughters. There's no way in hell I'm producing more scrotes to fuck up the world.

Anonymous 216323

daughter by a fucking mile i'm throwing myself down a flight of stairs in hopes of a miscarriage if the fetus is male

Anonymous 216337


there used to be a safe, legal option

Anonymous 216339

Maybe the right answer is both. Get to experience both. Maybe I'm being idealistic but it does have a nice ring to it in my head. Going to my son's sporting events. Playing with my daughter. Getting to watch them both become well developed adults. huuuuuhhhhhh…

Anonymous 216340

But then you have to put equal hard effort so both of them will grow up to be good people. I'm an older sister and I'm a failure loser with no experience and I hate the world while my younger brother is a successful, good normie with gf and social life.

Anonymous 216342

I'm sorry to hear that and you probably aren't a failure. I think the ideal way to raise both sons and daughters with with a good maternal and paternal figure. With either sex they both pay important roles in development. Fathers teach restraint, self control, and discipline, while Mothers keep their children happy, creative, thoughtful, and a whole lot more. I think its just tough for kids in a single Mother or father environment. Moids can't really do a mothers role and a mother can't really do a father's role.

Anonymous 216343

I wouldn't say my parents were bad parental figures but they were always kind of absent because of work, so that's the con of having multiple kids unless idk you're rich and have time for your kids.

Anonymous 216344

Despite paychecks getting lower (compared to inflation) work hours have gotten much longer have the decades.

Anonymous 216564

How do you know when you've found the right partner to have children with?

Anonymous 216578

see how they react around kids

Anonymous 216785

But which reaction is good? should they be really into kids? uninterested?

Anonymous 216792

You could also just ask. Just because someone likes being around children, doesn't mean that they want children. The question of raising a family is a pretty serious topic on its own that warrants a 'sit-down' conversation.

Anonymous 216826

What kind of reaction should they have? There is generally little reason to interact with other peoples kids. I imagine most men, and probably most women, have a negligible interest in random children.

Anonymous 216896

Not necessarily. I grew up with a guy who runs his own construction company.

In school he was an over achiever in practically every subject and was captain of the swimming team.
He's always been strong, kind and good natured. His family, like mine, was lower middle class so it wasn't money. It was his parents. They've always been extremely good people and they have a way of making you feel welcome and accepted. They were the kind of neighbours who would mow your lawn because they were already doing theirs. Invite the family over for Barbeques in the summer and if they were going to do something fun, come over and ask if you wanted to join them.

I have all kinds of fun memories with him, and he had a crush on me from middle school all the way to the end of high school. Then I went off to university and he went to an accelerated trade school even though he had a ticket to whatever college he wanted to apply for. His parents were behind the decision 100% because they were confident he knew what he wanted.

10 years later and he's running a residential construction business and I'm posting about him on a Nonas Knitting and Cross-Stitching BBS.

Anonymous 216911

You can play with your daughter and attend her sporting events. I don't blame you for wanting both though.
Are you sad you never got with him? Did he age well? It seems like private schools may be the way to go with moidlets. Is it because the teachers are stricter and are allowed to discipline kids?

Anonymous 216927


Ideally a daughter AND a son.
I'm an only child and I'm 100% convinced my life would have been better if I had a sibling.

Anonymous 216938


Anonymous 216990

>Which would you prefer?

Anonymous 217001


Here's your son, nona

Anonymous 217008

Daughters are the only option. Anything else is an abortion.

Anonymous 217058

And why would I do any of that?

Anonymous 217059

Boymoms are some of the most embarrassing pick-mes out there.
>as long as they're not black
Wait, what? Why?

Anonymous 217060

Knowing North Van his Mom is probably a chinese mainlander. At best Korean

Mainlanders are really uneducated and unrefined, to say the least, regardless of how much money they have

Anonymous 217065

>north van
You're telling me that's a person and not a brand of camping accessories for living in a van?

Anonymous 217079

Yup that’s what I was thinking. I’m asian and asian moms and grandmas are super racist against blacks (They lump brown guys with blacks too btw). Been told the same thing to not to date black or brown guys.

Anonymous 217083

>but it seems like in general sons are a bit lower maintenance
I would have to disagree.
A young boy's rowdy and energetic behavior can earn them getting into a whole heap of trouble, even before they've begun schooling.

Anonymous 217095


This moid is literally handed everything. I doubt he even respects his pickme mother

Anonymous 217135

Don't let your hate for men blind you to the reality of the sex ratio and its consequences on dating and general intersex relations.
In China there are 30-40 million more men than women due to sex selective abortion in previous decades. On one hand this allows for chinese women to demand more from men due to shortage (and so the chinese government tries to shame them, telling they are old at 27), but on the other, it causes loser men to "lie flat".
If the situation is reversed, and there are more women than men, then all men will benefit from it one way of another.

Anonymous 217322

Reading /r9k? makes me not want to have kids. Like, what if it turns out male? It's ironic, hearing moids sperg 24/7 about how women should be having kids makes me not want to have them.

Anonymous 217337

women who pamper their sons are the biggest gender betrayers around

Anonymous 217353

daughters, i'm confident in my ability to educate a son to be a good person but im pretty sure there is an unavoidable biological component to male retardation that i cant do anything about

Anonymous 217356

they're not lying flat they're kidnapping women from other countries and being violent retards.

Anonymous 217358

I'd rather have a boy because I want mental peace. I was sexually assaulted as a kid and the fear of that happening to my daughter would not let me sleep at night. There are way, way too many pedos in the world. And even if she escapes child abuse, I still have to worry about her finding a moid who will abuse her as an adult.
With a boy you just have to teach them not to be the abuser. As teens they become very anti-gay and are more likely to fend off a male abuser. Women pedos pretty much don't exist so the chances of him running into one are much lower.
I don't want a boy but I need a boy.

Anonymous 217360

>Mainlanders are really uneducated and unrefined
They're some of the best educated immigrants to the US actually.

It's funny because Taiwan and Hong Kong are vastly more "traditional" than the mainland, in all of the shitty, misogynistic ways that entails. And I'm not even going to discuss SEA Chinese and the fact things like husbands with de facto concubines is accepted.

I'm glad the CPC destroyed these elements of traditional Chinese culture. Tbh they didn't go far enough.

Anonymous 217361

>With a boy you just have to teach them not to be the abuser.
you can't do such a thing

Anonymous 217370

Sure you can. Don't feed him too much protein when he's young so he stays small for his age and doesn't learn aggression. If he tries to be aggressive at all at school he'll fail miserably and learn quickly that it doesn't work. Don't sign him up for any sports. Keep him away from video games and the internet. Just books, music, arts and craft, and light outdoor play. He won't be able to abuse anyone.

Anonymous 217374

Even if that worked, the whole point of having a son is to propagate your genes, which such a creature could not do. Neurotic manlets are not sons, functionally they are at best a kind of neutered animal.

Anonymous 217379

Nona, please don't have kids until you resolve your trauma. It's not healthy to keep your child malnourished, or to control your kid in such a way that you prevent them from doing harmless activities like sports. I also want to say from personal experience as someone who was neglected in childhood, underfed, and weak, I still acted out physically even as feeble kid, and was overall really hard to manage.

Anonymous 217381

I’ve only ever wanted daughters. I don’t like most boys names. Plus I believe in gender abolition and I feel like in some ways it’s more acceptable to have a GNC daughter than a GNC son- they’re more likely to be harshly bullied as kids and troon out I feel. idk I feel like I’d cave to pressures to raise my son to be tough and masculine to avoid him being bullied than I would be for a daughter if she didn’t want to be feminine. like I was a tomboy and it was fine and chill but the boys I knew who liked feminine things were called fags. does that make sense. I just feel like in a way it’s easier to raise a girl these days.

Anonymous 217389


Seriously this. When my two cousins were both kids, my aunt would always defend her son's rowdy behavior with, "well he's a boy, boys will be boys, they're like that because they just are". That boy would bully his sister, steal her money, and hog her school supplies. It pains me a little to watch mothers get into a dream-like state when they speak about their sons and defend their actions but when it's time to talk about daughters? They're either like "oh she's fine", or making a melodramatic deal about how having a daughter is "torture". When mothers get overprotective of their son's sex life and start treating any girlfriend like shit for not being copies of their mothers or what the mothers personally find attractive, it strikes me as borderline incestuous. It gives me the creeps, just like with those fathers who would threaten to hurt or even kill any boyfriend of their daughters that aren't a practical clone of themselves.

Anonymous 217465

reminds me of that youtube couple where a korean mother disowns her son after he brings a black woman home

Anonymous 217466

imagine being a boymom.

Anonymous 217629

Are you kidding me? Is this image real? I had no idea Vancouver was so beautiful.

Anonymous 217640


I don't know. I understand financially supporting your daughter or son when things get REALLY rough, but the fact that this mom bought her son a whole ass house in Vancouver while she also cooks him meals every weekend….that's the sad part about boy moms. They love their sons too much, and they coddle them which shields them from personal responsibility. Naturally, when the son grows up and lacks the sense of responsibility due to the coddling, the boy mom is forced to keep taking care of him as now the son really doesn't know how to take care of himself. Boy moms wouldn't have to keep pampering their sons like oversized infants if they didn't keep doing so in the first place. Even the fact that this mom cooks for her son every week gives me the impression that she secretly doesn't really trust him to cook for himself.

Anonymous 217649

Private schools don't have to kow-tow to state testing so the good ones have more leg room to teach the kids things they actually care about which naturally leads to better behavior since they aren't locking the moids up force feeding them the steps to mitosis

Anonymous 217663

Rich people have less time for their kids.
Rich people are rich in money, but not rich in time.
Rich people work long hours and are away on business trips.
My dad is a doctor and I would never see him because he'd be asleep as soon as he gets home.

Anonymous 217664

Be actually rich.

Anonymous 217667

My parents aren't rich and they have just as little time. Guess you have to be lucky in this age to have present parents.

Anonymous 217676

There still is if you don't live in a shithole country

Anonymous 217679


>women would be disadvantaged if males became the minority

might be the most braindead opinion I've ever read on the internet

less moids means less misogyny, fewer rapists, and fewer males to practice class solidarity

Anonymous 217683

>In China

Anonymous 217685

Sort your issues out before even thinking of having children, let alone sons. We don't need more moids with mommy issues in the world.

Anonymous 217692

Boymoms and pitbull mommies give off the same energy tbh.

Anonymous 217693

They are both so overprotective of their children or dogs to the point of using mental gymnastics to convince themselves that their "angels" never do anything wrong. I don't get it. Do these moms and dog owners see their children and dogs as complete copies of themselves, which makes them more likely to defend any bad thing they do? But why project yourself onto your kids and animals? I don't get it.

Anonymous 217723

i want daughters only
i cant imagine loving a scrote regardless of his age
also moids regularly rape and kill their mothers (look it up its a real thing)
also with a scrotelet you need to make sure there is a strong father figure that hes taught to be masculine but not violent that he doesnt watch andrew tate or pron make sure he actually goes to school instead of drinking with his buddies… just too much shit to worry about

Anonymous 217730


>scrotes regularly rape and kill their own mothers
Fucking hell, imagine having a mini moid that grows up and sexualizes you. I really have no anger or judgement to any woman that doesn't want a son.

Anonymous 217815

daughters hands down. I'd rather not get murder suicided by my kid (and as much as we like to be gender blind we all know murder suicides are committed by men like 99% of the time). Apparently if you have sex slightly before you ovulate instead of during ovulation you'll be more likely to get a daughter since X-sperm survive longer in inhospitable environments but move slower while Y-sperm move fast but die easily. even at the sperm level women are just better.
I like this

Anonymous 217912


Based on how they always act, teenage moids are one of God's greatest mistakes. They like to sexually assault girls, they treat their moms like shit, and they love to bully teachers who are just trying to do their job. I unapologetically hate teenage moids and I don't shed a single tear when I hear of them dying from something stupid like their own tiktok challenges or dares. I don't care if I'm mean, I hate male teenagers.

Anonymous 218187

Women will become disadvantaged because a skewed sex ratio will favor men in dating/courtship. Meaning the "bar for men" will become even lower.

Anonymous 218335

Russia and other slavic countries to lesser extent have the opposite problem of China. This trend will get more unbalanced in the future thanks to the current war going on and Russian government throwing more young men into the war meatgrinder. I dont know about you, but Russia does not seem to me like exceptionally feminist country, even compared to its neighbors on West.

Anonymous 218433

Ngl I'd do the same if I had a son. Minus the racist part.

Anonymous 218863

I'd want an older boy and a younger girl. I feel like older brothers usually take a bit more care of their sisters if that makes sense, plus I could put most responsibility on my son so he won't grow up to be awful. Just a thought, one of my friends in middle school had an older brother who was pretty protective of her. I always thought it was really sweet, I think it gives them a sense of responsibility.

Anonymous 218870

Ime older brothers bully and harass their younger sisters

Anonymous 219296

I want a gay son. He will sexually harass girls less

Anonymous 219404

I'd like to have a good amount of both

Anonymous 219423

So he can rape a little boy instead of a girl?

Anonymous 219431

that's not the issue, the problem with gay boys is that homosexuality isn't a cure for misogyny, sure they might be too grossed out to rape a woman but they aren't above the reproductive exploitation and the general degradation of women through other means.

Anonymous 222053

Why do asians hate brown and black people? They never colonized them

Anonymous 222054

By that logic india and China is a dating paradise

Anonymous 225563


Anonymous 225657


Anonymous 225665

Wanting to birth a son over wanting to birth a daughter is like wanting to parent a rabid chimpanzee over an actual human infant. A mental illness. Am I dehumanizing men because I don't like them? Fuck yeah.

Anonymous 226141

I've noticed that my supposedly feminist sister still spoils her son more than her daughter.

Anonymous 226145


It's that boymom brain. I don't know why, but it's like having a son always kills the common sense and rationality of any woman no matter how intelligent she was before the pregnancy. Pampering their sons with too much free labor and money when they should know how to cook/clean and work by now, always making excuses for inexcusable behavior like saying he was a "good boy" when he commits a crime, acting hyper-territorial of her son about his love/sex life as if SHE's his fucking girlfriend even though she's the mother, and more things that I'm sure I missed. I don't know why moms always get like this when they have a son, but they always just do. Maybe they put too much value on their son because they're emotionally desperate enough to view him as like a second husband. Maybe this is what people mean by "emotional incest".

Anonymous 226593

There are a couple of things that I noticed from what I've seen of MILF MANOR.
First - the emotional incest is mutual. From the very first episode, the moms are mateguarding their sons, and the sons are mateguarding their moms. You start out wondering if the boys are just that way be>>216052
cause the fathers were out of the picture given the nature of that show, or if it's scripted like the rest of reality tv, but uhm. There are husbands and wives who are less mutually jealous than these sonsbands and milfs.
Second - these sons are in the top whatever percentage of male specimens, physically, and probably socially. These are the males >>216052 was talking about with
>football captain, good grade, obedient son
so - this is how football captain goodgrade obedient sons are made.
Boymoms must be like that quote about sausage factories, "if you like sausage you don't want to see how it's made."

Anonymous 229876

why do women pamper their sons?
like, straight up spoil them? why?

Anonymous 229893

Anonymous 229900

Get him molested by a pedophile and its likely he'll grow up gay.

Anonymous 230278

congratulations, you gave birth to a normal ass boy. please don't be a retard and let him do his thing. eventually he will learn to stop doing the things that get him hurt, and learn how to be a person, as all small children do.

Anonymous 230396


Missed a few statistics classes heh?

Anonymous 231232


The rich tame them with sex

Anonymous 234683

You see the same thing with lots of animals. Orca mothers will stop giving birth after they have a son and will care for it until she dies. While it might have to do with males being a larger and being useful in tackling larger prey, the main reason is that males are better at spreading the mother's genes than a daughter. If the mother raises the biggest and fittest son, the son will sire children in all of the surrounding pods. Maybe there is something similar with human mothers and daughters.

Anonymous 234685

I think it's similar, in fact I would say it's worse in humans because while the orcas neglect their daughters in comparsion, many human societies decide that they don't want to deal with them at all and practice female infanticide

Anonymous 234688

But the countries you see that in, China, India, and the Middle East, are all super messed up demographically. I don't want to be one of those people who constantly say "china will collapse in the next 5 years", but having a massively skewed female to male population that are all tiktok addicts can't be good.

Anonymous 234689

oh no they'll go from a billion to a couple hundred million that's basically like going extinct

Anonymous 234693

I think they are all in for a rough time. India's and China's greatest asset is their large labor force. As they westernize no one will want to work labor. By the time the governments feel the need to force people to do those jobs like they used to, it will be largely replaced by automation and the lack of new mothers will destroy their large labor force. China keeps itself an economic power by economically taking over third world countries, opposed to the USSR's military's take overs of eastern Europe. But like the USSR, sapping other weaker countries of their labor force and resources only goes so far. The middle east doesn't have the same labor force, but people are becoming less reliant on middle eastern oil, so they are in a similar position. People like to claim Muslims have a high replacement rate, but all those rich oil states need to import loads of immigrants to maintain their work forces so maybe not that much…

tldr: less daughters -> less mothers -> country goes to shit

Anonymous 234700

>tldr: less daughters -> less mothers -> country goes to shit
I would be a lot more comfortable with this chain of logic if your evidence for it weren't China, a country which has seen an unprecedented wave of prosperity and development and unimaginable uplift in standard of living within the past half century.

Anonymous 234701

Until preteen years, I think sons and daughters are probably equally as difficult. Not to say they don't have their own unique issues, but 90% of the issues with them stems from them being small high energy humans that you need to protect, teach, and feed. After that it all depends on how well they were raised. If both the mom and dad do their respective disciplining, the teen years and beyond are much easier than its made out to be. I always remember, my mom and dad would make my brothers do all the heavy lifting for them. Whenever there was lawn work, stuff that needed to be carried, or so on, they'd dump the work on them. If you are a terrible parent, than you should worry about getting your nose broken by your son because you didn't make him mac'n'cheese. If you can't discipline your kids, you probably shouldn't have kids anyways.

I'd be happy with either sons or daughters, and I think it would be fun to have both if I could find someone able to support kids with me.

Anonymous 234702

I agree, its more complicated then I made out to be, but at this point China is walking down the same path as the USSR. I'm not going to write a 4 thousand page essay about it, but China's current state is no sustainable for a ton of different reasons. Also the standard of living hasn't increased that much for the vast majority of Chinese citizens. Like India, most people in China live in slums. If 100 million people in china are now almost living at first world standards (extremely generous) that still leaves 900 million to 1.2 billion people living in third world conditions. With a literal incel generation coming up, I don't think it will continue improving much…

Anonymous 235017

I remember reading in the news once of a young man who killed a girls parents either because she asked him to or because he wanted to kidnap her.
It wasn't clear why from the article, only that the parents were killed.
The strangest and most unlikely of outcomes can happen, and murder is one of those.
Having a daughter may make your family more of a target.
You cannot escape death, you might as well live life without fear of it.

Anonymous 235018

What kind of logic is this

Anonymous 235029

Literally for what reason would I ever prefer a son

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