/b/ - Random

>>255325
Is picrel supposed to be basic?

>>255327
I'm a sperg so idk but it looks basic to me, if you have suggestions on how to look more basic I'm happy to hear

>>255328
I don't think basic includes tacky jewelry or fashionable sweaters or uggs. I think basic is the opposite of fashion or any aesthetic whatsoever.

Just wear leggings/shorts and non-retarded graphic tees, you don’t have to put in too much effort. Try to fit a color scheme that’s complimentary to you (literally just light or dark) and don’t over accessorize. We are in an era of fast fashion, a lot of “basic” clothing will be outdated very soon. Not to mention alternative fashion seems to be the preference of younger people recently

>>255329
I see a lot of women layering small gold necklaces that are of tacky things like hearts or text that says something like "love," to me that is basic because everyone is doing it just because they see other people doing it. Like when "live laugh love" farmhouse aesthetic home decor used to be everywhere until it stopped being popular.

>>255340
Perhaps a better word would be bandwagon. Basic means stripped of everything but the essential. Jewelry and home decors aren't essential, so I wouldn't use the word basic to describe them. The idea that what's popular is what is default, is a corrosive one to the mind.
Possibly there's a slang meaning that I don't know, but you shouldn't use slang anyways.

>>255328
you must be rich

>>255345
maybe you're just poor

>>255346
idk where do you live where VCA is basic wear? saudi arabia?

unrelated but I always kek at giant baby sippycups, just why

>>255344
>The idea that what's popular is what is default, is a corrosive one to the mind.
You're right but that's how people see things. It's not normal to do things like have an OnlyFans account and suck 500 billion dicks but that's how people often prejoratively use words like normie/normalfag etc.

>>255327
It's pretty basic aside from the Van Cleef jewelry lol


Anyway this "women bullying and belittling other women" just doesn't happen irl. Not outside high school. You're not living in a Mean Girls movie.

>>255364
>Anyway this "women bullying and belittling other women" just doesn't happen irl. Not outside high school.
Oh yes… It really does happen. I've spent 5 years getting my major in psychology, which only had 2 moids in a sea of mostly back-stabbing bitches

>>255364
It happens a lot in all female workplaces like the healthcare field. Even just as a patient I've gotten snarky back handed compliments from nurses about my shoes.

>>255325
this is how ive been feeling tbh

>>255364
>after high school
High school bullying is not real.
Junior high bullying is very real, and very violent.
College bullying is a matter of intentional social exclusion, has noted negative consequences for young women, and is underrepresented in media because it's too complex to be an inclusion in any story that isn't a detailed analysis of how bullying works in adulthood.
Workplace bullying is a thousand different things which are all more important than anything that happens in high school.
The myth of high school bullying began because it is cheaper, easier and much less legally problematic to have adult actors playing high school students engaging in violence-trauma-responses than to film anything approaching the raw reality of why certain character development patterns happen in real life.
High school bullying presented in American male coming-of-age stories because it's a way of elliptically alluding to the actual, statistically-verifiable and enormous rate of male-male rape that happens in American junior high afterschool programs including athletics (there's a reason it's always a jock in those movies but always a mustachioed sportscoach in the newspapers). Among high school girls in film it is a different metaphor for the callous indifference or even support for abuser that can come from peers after abuse by a male, particularly a popular male.
Watch any high school bullying coming of age movie and replace all the instances of bullying with flashbacks to being shower raped by the star baller and all of a sudden the entire movie makes more sense on every single level. The bullying scenes are always so out of touch with reality but the victim's trauma-response behavior and character development are usually realistic enough to point to the fact that there is an unspoken reality being addressed.

>>255364
It’s so insidious and fucked up how people just dismiss or don’t believe women who have been bullied by other women, in the name of feminism or something. By the way Mean Girls was based on true stories.

You might not listen/believe me now, but when people go out of their way to say unnecessary rude things to you, it's almost always projection. When they say that your outfit is ugly, that's how they feel on the inside all the time and now they want you to feel ugly too

>>255387
people who dismiss women bullying other women are usually themselves bullies. cause pf course they always blame the victim for being stuck up or bringing it on herself.

>>255325
>>255346
>whines about other women "not treating her with basic respect" and "belittling" her
>dunks on a random anons for being "poor"

You reap what you sow.

>>255325
Finally someone acknowledging this, most of the time it's behind your back but it still hurts.

>>255421
I'm OP and that's not me, I don't even know the brands of any of those items and how much they cost other than the Uggs, the OP pic is just an image I found on pinterest that captured the impression I have of what currently popular women's fashion is like.

So how would you dress if you weren't bullied by mean women?
Tbh, I'm mostly "bullied" by like teenagers or something, actual adults find my dressing style cute or attractive

>>255427
I like the vibes of y2k twee and Japanese styles like otome fashion, whimsical and with details like ruffles and pin tucks, that's how I would dress if I didn't get mean comments but it's just not worth it to me anymore. Like if you're reading this post and imagining what I'm describing looks ugly that's the kind of reaction I want to stop getting from people, I would rather give people a neutral impression by dressing in what's currently popular than suffer negative social consequences for "expressing myself" with clothes. The trade-off isn't worth it.

>>255429
Sounds like the classic case of people hating on something unusual/uncommon. Those are actually very pretty lol. I thought that y2k was getting revived tho

WEAK, SKILL ISSUE, ETC, ETC.
I DRESS LIKE A VAMPIRE EVERYDAY AND I HAVE MULTIPLE FRIENDS AND A FEMME GF
DROWN IN YOUR SELF IMPOSED MISERY OP, CAN'T RELATE

>>255431
>picrel
This is what you call vampire?

>>255431
you sound super cringe and I guarantee you people without autism have said something about you behind your back. Is it a skill issue or are you that delusional?

>>255581
>I guarantee you people without autism have said something about you behind your back
Evergreen comment if you're autistic tbqh

>>255325
if you want to enjoy wearing the clothes you like you have to stop caring what people think. for every hater there will always be people who appreciate your fashion and compliment you. if they treat you like shit belittle them back
>t. wears scene fashion in 2023

You either handle the banter or you don't
I have a friend who dresses like a 15 year old metal head from 1985 and I call her Beavis for it all the time. I get that some women are pushy enough to actually exclude you because of how you dress. You call them bitches and move on. Or just don't say anything and move on because they're not people you want to associate with if they're like that anyway.

>>255581
shes a psychopath and free unlike op

>>255329
When people say something is "basic" they mean its very popular and therefore not unique. Usually talked about in the context of women who follow vanilla fashion trends. I can see where you get that impression from though, logically that is what basic SHOULD mean, but it doesn't

>>255331
>(literally just light or dark)
Not at all. Finding colors that match your undertone (cool/warm) undertone are probably much more important than if you look good in dark/light clothing. Also if its more muted or more saturated is important to consider.

>>255581
>not surrounding yourself with autist friends and an autist gf so you can comfortably bee urself
>valuing the opinions of people you don't even like above your own joy
That's the real cringe.
I dress silly most days and have promising career prospects, a cute fellow autist gf, and lovely friends who like my outfits. I have embraced what I am and I'm so fucking happy.
It makes me so sad to read about anons being miserable for no reason. Some of you are young and I get that, but it is genuinely frustrating. I want all nonas to experience the joys of true self-love, even the mean ones.

>>255941
What are friends and where do I purchase them?

>>255942
Gotta go outside and show interest in others while balancing your own boundaries and standards.
It takes some trial and error but the payout is worth it.

No one over the age of 16 bullies anyone else for their clothing choices unless they are full retarded.

>>255404
I was bullied relentlessly throughout junior high to the point where I had to start going to another school more than an hour away from where I lived. High school bullying is barely a thing, bullies in high school are the ones who get shunned because people are actually trying to take themselves seriously in high school and make academic progress to prepare for college or university. Women aren't bullying you for your clothing, you just think every women who isn't buddy buddy with you is some bitch because you have internalized misogyny and think of women as catty and passive aggressive. You're most likely the problem. Bullying in adulthood is non existent unless you're literally surrounded by diagnosed narcissists. Seriously, get over it. It shouldn't even effect you.

>>255387
Queen Bees and Wanna Bes was literally written by a bully, dumbass. The book is condescending and treats adolescent girls like they're meant to fit a certain mold or they will suffer, there is nothing in that book about self acceptance or healthy attitudes about how others perceive you. Direct quote from the book;
>"If your daughter wants to dye her hair green, the reason why doesn’t change if you forbid her. So let her. In a few years, she’ll have only herself to blame when she winces at pictures of herself because her skin looks sallow next to that green hair, and she has a nasty, sullen expression on her face. You, on the other hand, then and now look like the reasonable and wise parent."

>>256043
Just because it didn’t happen to you doesn’t mean it never happens, how do you look at someone saying ‘I was bullied’ and say you must be the problem and immediately accuse them of internalized misogyny. What are you even basing that on. And workplace bullying is absolutely a thing as well that people quit over.

>>256048
Because I'm an adult living in the real world, not an autist stuck inside my own insecure head.

Can't even stick up for yourself as an adult woman? You need to speak up, no one is going to hold your hand. If you're legitimately being bullied in adulthood by narcs you need to get a fucking grip.

>>256043
>Bullying in adulthood is non existent unless you're literally surrounded by diagnosed narcissists.
Interesting take, lol.
If I'm right, there's only "conduct disorder" if someone bullies you and they're not an adult, and they probably grow out of these toxic traits once they become an adult. Don't surround yourself with narcissists and psychopaths!

>>256049
Jesus fucking Christ even if the op of this thread is ‘an autist stuck in her head about catty women’ or whatever how can you outright deny girl on girl bullying is something that happens? I worked at a school where it was mostly bullied girls, some of them couldn’t speak any more.

>>256053
Threads like this are always made by a woman who "can't relate to other women" and would rather hang out with men because they think of women in the same stereotype men do. If you can't speak up for yourself because someone who never grew up is making you feel bad about something as childish as what you wear, I don't regard that as "woman on woman" bullying. I was "bullied" by my mother well into my adulthood, always calling me an ugly, untalented, unwanted bitch. Well, she's got NPD, so why would I take anything she says seriously? Adult bullies are adult children. Get over it. Speak up for yourself.

>>256053
Being bullied as a child is wildly different than being bullied in adulthood. Children haven't fully developed and don't have an understanding of their impact. I can't tell you how many times I've run into a former bully only for her to hide herself like she's humiliated because she knows she acted like an insane person. I've had shoes thrown at my head, gum put in my hair, had my headphones stolen and ripped apart, had people start vicious rumours….in junior high.

>>256054
What’s wrong with not being able to relate to other women? Not everything is some evil NLOG plot. And if you’re outnumbered or the workplace doesn’t care then it doesn’t matter if you speak up for yourself. Same with group dynamics or exclusion.

>>256055
Okay, I guess because that stuff only happened to you in junior high it never happened to anyone else at a later age.

>>256057
>>256056
I don't know why you would choose to let petty shit like someone giggling over your sneakers to bother you in your adulthood. There is a big difference between bullying for schoolyard clout and being straight up childish in adulthood. You're outnumbered? Seriously, look for a new job. Why would you put up with that? Don't give me excuses that there is no where else for you to work, that is just lazy bullshit. Live your life for yourself instead of looking for more reasons to victimize yourself and be miserable. It's your life, take some goddamn control. If I can do it, why can't you? Do you want me to go into all my trauma to qualify what I'm saying, so that you can finally pull yourself up by your Uggs and make some progress with your self love? Please, anon. Adult bullying isn't a fucking issue.

>>256056
NTA but I think what she's trying to say is that bullying is a thing that only children, and adult children [emotionally stunted adults aka narcissists] do. Childish behaviors that you're supposed to grow out of when you realize your mistakes that they couldn't.
It's easy to just ask you to avoid diagnosed [or undiagnosed] narcissists but when it's a workplace and they're your coworker [or even worse your boss] then you're going to have a bad time.
Also, I guess what she says is that you have the power to not put up with their shit and to stand up for yourself.

>>256059
Exactly, bingo

>>256058
You sound really naive, especially telling people to just get a new job. Yes someone saying your sneakers are ugly in highscool shouldn’t matter. That’s hardly what’s being talked about when we talk about adult bullying. And again you seem to think because it hasn’t happened to you it’s not an issue.

>>256061
I'm not talking about in highschool I'm talking about the anon who says the other nurses at her job make fun of her shoes. And yes, you can get a new job, if you actually put in the effort instead of coming here to cry about it.

>>256059
>>256060
I get you now. My bad.

>>256061
It's not "just get a new job", it's have some self respect and be an adult, unlike you're so-called bullies

>>256063
Yeah and your reasoning for it being fake apparently is some anon here. And it’s really not that easy unless your job is McDonald’s.

Bullies are sad, pathetic and internally lonely people. If you take their shit to heart, you need to snap out of it. There is no reason you should continuous subject yourself to the mental illness of others. Take control of your life.

>>256067
KEK, now you're the one being naive. How old are you? Freshly 18?

>>256069
Leaving a job ‘because I was being bullied’ isn’t going to look good to any employer and there’s no guarantee you’ll get another one for the same rate especially in this economy.

>>256070
"a study" yeah, that's proof.

>>256068
Well if you’re the one being subjected to their mental illness and there’s more of them than you and no matter how you react it doesn’t stop and you have to go there every day then idk how you take control of that.

>>256071
Why would you say that's the reason? Don't be dense on purpose just to try and prove your point. You say that you were interested in pursuing other opportunities, a healthier work environment, that isn't unprofessional and if you think it is you got some thinking to do.

>>256074
That’s fair but like… there’s not always a guarantee you’ll find a better job if you leave your job. A lot of people can’t take that risk as well.

>>256070
I don't know about any studies but I can imagine why they can be more successful and popular. They usually have goonies that do their job, and they take credit or steal your work and present it as theirs, and if they messed up then they shift it to someone they hate and make them their buttmonkey. Their success isn't because they're actually successful. They're just good at presenting themselves to be.
I don't know about their sexual activity but I can imagine them trading benefits for sexual favors at workplace, or using their position of authority to force themselves upon others.

>>256075
You don't leave the job until you've secured another one, you stay on while you job search. An adult would understand that…

In most cases, you are the solution to your own problem. You just have to have faith in yourself that you are in charge of your own life. Of course I would never apply this logic to someone in an abusive situation at home, that's not something that is easily controlled and can be scary to escape from. But in cases like this, you have all the power, you just have to believe that you do. Trust me, girls.

>>256048
I worked a minimum wage office job once that was mostly staffed by fat WOC and we got a new hire who was a beautiful blonde military wife and all the fat shaniquasaurus rexes called her Elsa to her face and left passive aggressive anonymous post it notes on her desk saying passive aggressive things with plausible deniability that they're not bullying her saying "hi Elsa :)" and openly excluded her from conversations they were all having together to her face. I quit before she did because I had the luxury to leave but she had it worse than me as the fresh white meat.