/b/ - Random

>>85901
That's it? People have done some absolutely cringe stuff OP, I doubt your hill mix up has even been remembered so I wouldn't let it bother you. The only cringe thing I ever remember someone doing is in 6th grade, a boy stuck Nerds candy up his nose, blew it out, and then ate it.
I think the most embarrassing thing I've ever done is I was so desperate for people to come to my 10th birthday party, that I even invited my bullies and still no one came. One girl who was otherwise friendly to me made the excuse that she had to go furniture shopping. Though I did ask someone in the army if he ever killed someone and that was pretty embarrassing in hindsight. Though I don't understand why military people get so pissy about being asked, their job is literally to kill people their master's point them at. It would be like if mechanics got pissy when people asked them if they've ever worked on a Corvette.

>>85905
majority of mil personnel are in non combat roles and the ones that are may not have been deployed their entire career, ones who have killed people don't want to talk about it because unless they're psychotic the act of killing traumatized them, but yes i asked this same question and also embarassed myself in front of a special forces marine both separate instances

I used to wear yaoi anime boys on my backpack with a matching lanyard and matching tshirt with a matching wallet all from hot topic to school

>>85911
Next time I meet one I'll ask them how many times someone's asked them if they've killed someone.

Honestly far too many of these to list, I get so awkward in social situations I almost immediately embarrass myself. I wonder if I am autistic because I rely so often on politeness/a 'script' for normal conversations and completely fail without it, I once asked someone how their mother was after they told me she had died maybe 2~ minutes earlier in the conversation.

>>85905
In retrospect: not that cringe, you're right. 15 year old me got really embarrassed over tiny things when people probably didn't care that much.
Your story is pretty sad cringe. Hope that doesn't come off as mean, I'm saying this because I can relate to being alone on birthday parties. I really hope you are surrounded by cool and cringe people now and don't have to eat cake alone :(
On my 18th (last birthday), family came over to eat and then watched me finish Dead Space 3 and then we played with balloons and that was it. Felt like a pure loser but then again finished the game, huzzah. (:(
And 6th graders are incredibly gross, I'm not surprised he ate booger candy considering I have seen a kid consume an entire glue stick with pride

>>85912
Genuinely that is hilarious anon, love the autistic energy of fujoshis and pls don't be afraid to bee urself :) if you ask me it's a powermove over the ahegao sweatshirt kids
>>85925 samefag, I understand the 'script' feeling and having to learn body language and facial expressions. But the mother story is pretty painful, feeling second hand embarrassment here. I really appreciate how there are other weird gorls here too, we're heckin' valid retards <3

>>85901
anyone got any embarrassing period stories?
>be me
>6th grade
>shy quiet weird girl who LIKES to sit at the back of the class but because of stupid alphabetical order is forced to sit next to her crush
>raging hormones in love with this moid i have exchanged a few words with
>only spoke when spoken to
>he only talks to me if he forgot his text book and needs to share or forgot his pen and needs to borrow a pen (and then he never gave those pens back)
>sit in middle between him and his best friend
>have to suffer through dumb boy talk and jokes
>feel warm gushy mush between my legs
>think it's just discharge, nbd
>walk up to teacher's desk in front of the classroom to get my test results
>turn around
>instinctively look at my crush because he is cute to look at and i want to see if he's watching me in my cute outfit
>he looks horrified like he walked in on a murder scene
>quickly walk back to my chair
>notice a shiny sheen on seat surface
>recognize it's blood
>mfw i had my first period in front of my crush and had no pads or tampons
>autistic enough to ignore blood stain, pretend nothing happened, sit on it to hide it from everyone else
>patiently wait for school day to be over
>try to hold back the red flood gates by not moving at all throughout the day
>wait for everyone in classroom to leave
>swap chairs with my bully
>the chairs are red so once the blood dries, she won't know
>walk home in bloodied jeans
>hoodie wrapped around my waist to hide the blood stain on my buttcheek
>siblings ask what's on my butt when I come home
>say it's ketchup
>look in mirror
>visible red stain
>mfw crush connected two and two together and witnessed my first period
>mfw have to see him tomorrow
>tomorrow comes and I can't look at his face and he can't look at me either
I had to sit next to him for the remainder of that school year. It was the most awkward thing ever. I am so grateful he never brought it up or spoke a word of it to anyone in our class.

This episode still haunts me sometimes
>be me
>last high school year
>stupid trip to a swimming club
>don't wanna go because I hate myself and my body, mother makes me go anyway
>no friends because none of the outcasts wanted to go either
>stick with my sister's friends
>oh well, might as well go swimming anyway, try to have some fun
>stupid bikini is too small because I'm flat and had to buy it in child's section
>go to the pool slide
>get my head out of the water, everyone is looking at me and I hear some laughing
>look down, don't understand what is going on yet
>bikini got out, my booba is showing
>dying inside, but show no reaction, search my top and put it back as fast as possible
>pretends nothing happened
>go back home
>cry the rest of the day, replaying the exact same moment in my head countless times

I was a weird stupud ignorant kid in middle school that lacks common sense.
>me walking with friends to the next class
>other kids and us saw a used condom outside on the ground
>all grossed out and finding it funny
>me having the audacity to pick it up
>haha look at me having the balls to touch this little nasty thing!
>holds it in front of friends as a joke
>EEEWWW!!
>friends immediately shouts at me to drop it and go wash my hands twice

>be me
>14 year old unabashed fujoshi
>friends are aware of my fujo autism but they put up with it and indulge me sometimes
>one day, decide to invite two of my friends over to my house
>they come over, we fuck around, fun times are had
>a few hours later
>playing vidya, friends are starting to get bored
>get a great idea
>show them my explicit yaoi porn I drew with my own hands
>it's the type of degenerate shit that would get you cancelled nowadays
>be met with deafening silence
>friends have no idea how to react and are clearly uncomfortable
>realize I fucked up
>wrack brain for a way out of this awkward situation
>'haha would you look at the time! I have guitar lessons in half an hour, looks like you guys are gonna have to leave!'
>effectively kick them out of the house out of shame
>next day at school
>we all pretend nothing happened
I like to cope by telling myself this incident strengthened our bond, considering we're still friends after all these years.

>>85919
extremely based

>>86011
Another one that's stuck with me and wished it never happened
>had come upon the word "masturbation" for the first time from a friend
>me not understanding the use of word for it
>after school tutoring with kids I don't know and a bully
>scratching my ass underneath my pants and underwear for some reason
>others kids saw me and whispering
>bully asks me what I was doing
>sweating
>I'm masturbating!
>everyone was shocked and confused
>bully asks for the second time
>panicking and not thinking
>I SAID I'M MASTURBATING!
>bully, "you hear that Mr.(teacher)?!"
>teacher keeps his head down continuing writing away his work
>yeah I heard that
>kids continue to stare at me
>knew I fucked up
>I want to go home

>>85929
It got much better. I have friends who spontaneously call me everyday now. God bless extroverts.

>>85973
Losing it at this absolute power move
>Goodbye forever losers, I'm too cool for you
>1 year later
>What up losers, I'm back

>>85983
Man, you guys are bring up some memories. I wore a sun dress to school once and it twisted around and my entire boob was out at the cafeteria. None of my friends told me because they were too embarrassed by the awkwardness of the situation. I looked down and fixed it myself. XD

>>86017
This wins. I died reading this, but maybe to the other kids you just looked incredibly bold and unashamed. Absolute Stacy energy <3

>>85944
You deliberately made your bully sit in your period blood? Based, we love a dominant queen.

>>86021 I'm really happy to hear you got a happy ending, gives me hope too
(but the sundress story is a million times more embarrassing than asking a silly question omg)

>>86014
Kek
So what you drawn?

>>85901
how do you focus on counting backwards from 1000 by 7s while running? i wish i could do that

>>87489
It was shota porn. I ripped it up and burned it later. Wish I'd done that before I had the chance to show it to my friends…

Idk


> be me
> have strep throat
> given antibiotics
> be school during break
> think I have to fart
> actually shit myself
> common side effect from antibiotic


Luckily I was near a store I could drive to and by a cheap pair of pants. No one knew.

Lesson of the day: always eat when taking antibiotics.

>>87504
i didn't understand why you were so ashamed given you'd already made it clear you were a fujo, but now i see. you have reason to feel the way you do.

>>85912
Queen

>be me on my first year of high school
>reinserting into society after being a neet since 12yo
>having an instant crush on a guy way out of my league, he was beautiful like a greek statue
>he approached me like he did with most of the girls of the class because he was such a chad
>felt like an autistic mess every time he talked to me so i expressed my agitation through passive agressive attitude and physical violence
>he was your typical playful, sporty guy so we always played this little game of kicks, struggle and running after the other
>i became addicted to the sensation of touching him even in these lame conditions, it was the only way for me to interact with him
>one day after class i started shit with him once again like the desperate needy bitch i was
>ended up on the floor, literally clinging to his leg while begging him not to go (or something between these lines) while he kept walking and crawling me like a rag
>some people who were still in the classroom saw this
>once we were out of school and taking different paths to home i yelled shit to him from the paralel avenue just to catch his attention once more

yeah I have like 100 other stories of cringemax with this guy. I was still fixated with him until he leave the school (2 years ago) and I never stopped orbiting him even when he was clearly interested in my stacy friend (who unironically gave me advices to seduce him). Now I'm a grown ass woman of 20 and still having dreams about us being lovey dovey just to wake up to the harsh reality of having been rejected multiple times by my teen crush and not having enough self-esteem, self control and dignity to get over it the first time.

>be me
why do you post this shit? who the fuck else would you be, idiot? "be" someone else? what the fuck. there has to be something in the water making young people more stupid

>>87662
it's an old way of formatting green text stories, it's many, many, many years old though, not a new thing

>>87662
>young people
It's the traditional way of greentexting and young people are the ones who no longer do it.

>be me, 13, edgy BVB fan
>go to first official comic con in my city
>wear a cat ear maid headband because weeb phase
>accidentally meet friend of mine
>giddily harass poor artist into drawing me with the 11th Doctor
>he takes a picture of me doing dumb weeb pose and I go off while he does it
>my friend and I ask every moid for their phone number in weird attempt to get cool nerd gamer boyfriends
>we were two overweight emos who still looked like kids loudly yelling anime references and laughing like yards

I die everytime I see a very specific picture of me posing with an obese Grell Surcliff cosplayer

>>85901
Words failed me in an art store and I momentarily though Viridian was a shade of purple.