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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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I was contacted by my abusive ex boyfriends’ most recent ex Anonymous 104067

For context: I haven’t spoken to my abusive ex in well over three years and I was only aware he was dating someone new about a year ago when I finally got around to blocking some of his side/spam accounts (had her name in his bio). I received a random Instagram message the other day from someone I didn’t recognize and they very briefly asked me if I had ever dated ex. Her reasoning for contacting me was trying to figure out why me and ex had broken up in the first place because he had never told her (no surprise there) and I assume she wanted to see if there was some pattern of behavior. The whole situation however has just left me feeling so fucking angry. I finally had put most of it behind me, but finally realizing that this awful man had done the same exact thing to another innocent woman, an even younger woman than myself to boot, has made me so irrationally upset. I guess I was hoping the pain I had gone through was a selfish one and that he would treat the people he dated in the future better, but of course not he’s just actual scum. Like myself this poor girl had wasted years and thousands of dollars on him and had nothing to show for it, but emotional scars and insecurities moving forward. I just don’t understand how the worst men get to continually treat women like this and get no punishment for it.

Anonymous 104069

>>104067
That's terrible. That's how it is with abusers, their pattern of behaviors don't change… Did she end up leaving him too?

Anonymous 104070

>>104067
I always wished the exes of people I've dated would've reached out and warned me. I always was tempted to contact them before dating their partners but was worried they'd be angry or I'd bring back bad memories or they'd think I was some hand maiden trying to make them jealous or something, but in truth every time I just dated a guy who kept basically repeating the same mistakes in every relationship

Anonymous 104071

>>104069
I believe she was the one to break things off. I’m proud that she was able to make that choice for herself.

Anonymous 104072

>>104070
I had always thought of doing this too, but then I was worried the woman would think I was some scorned ex trying to get back at him. Also it’s just hard to go off such little information (a name in bio) to try to contact with. The only reason she found me in the first place was because of an old post he had up



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