Bad weather friends Anonymous 104241
We all know about fairweather friends, but what about the opposite? I have a friend (irl) who thrives on taking care of people and as a result is constantly overwhelmed with everything. I try not to bother her when I'm dealing with anything so as to not add to her load, but I noticed that she's never as interested in me as when some shit is up. And I'm the same way, if someone's about to break up their relationship or dealing with drama I'm way more motivated to talk to them compared to receiving good news and yass kweening them. Why are we like that
Anonymous 104308
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I've been that friend. Maybe tell her. When she'll deal with that shit (she will), that conversation could help her.
>Why are we like that
Women are systematically repressed and tasked with other people's emotional burden. This does not create healthy minds.
If as a child you were praised for being the mature one, the one everyone can rely on during a crisis, then you'll end up chasing crisis after crisis as long as you feel like you have to please mommy/daddy to feel okay (not happy, okay).
Anonymous 104348
I have this issue with a friend. When we met he was friendless and I was a mess, so he was a fixture in my life; always calm and rational, full of solutions to my unending problems. He got me to stop drinking, lose weight, eat better, move out of home etc. and was willing to go to the wall for me multiple times in very dramatic, even violent situations. Then I stopped having problems, because he'd paved the way for me to change, and suddenly he just started drifting away. I know now that he has absolutely 0 self-esteem and doesn't understand why people would want to be around him if he isn't providing a service to them. I now have to put all the energy into our friendship by forcing him to be social, but it's not exactly a burden when I consider he did more for me than my own family or government would.
Anonymous 106337
>>104348how did you get one of those……………