/feels/ - Advice & Venting

>>107469
>"I dont like these people"
>stop hanging around them
>???
>PROFIT
You're complicating a simple issue. You haven't found your people yet, so go look for them instead of lamenting the ones you're around now.

>>107472
They are everywhere cause I fucking said that every woman is a pickme etc. You are misunderstanding me like every single person ever, it's just so tiring

>>107469
my friend, who lets her bf with tonsil stones call her ugly and asks her to dress like women he has a crush on keeps lecturing me on why I should be trying to mold men into what I want them to be instead of just rejecting them outright. meanwhile, my other friend who's been getting into arguments with her pornsick boyfriend for 2 YEARS begging him to stop looking at porn while waxing her vagina comes and tells me "oh you should wear jeans instead of sweatpants. i know it's shallow but i think men concede to us more if they think we're beautiful. i know that because my bf finally stopped watching porn and it's because he feels so lucky to have me." it's thoroughly absurd. some part of me wants to put an end to the unsolicited advice by saying "hey I'm mostly open to advice from people who are in relationships I'd actually want" but it feels mean

I'm the op, this post is gonna die anyway so I'm gonna add a few things.
I'm just a woman with self preservation but I am seen as negative meanwhile most women love things like Lana del rey or Sylvia plath which to me became too negative to indulge in anymore,
I see engaging in the heterosexual dynamic as either losing or having to be the feminine gender role,
There is 100% chance of abuse happening in there relationships, 100% chance of being fucked over etc.
As women we will be lonely for the rest of our lives so why worsen this loneliness by being with men which you have to serve and they will never be what you want them: loving you like you love them
I have noticed that women as a collective groom and brainwash other women too and there definitely is a hivemind being created naturally as a result of natural female socialization, males and the patriarchy conceived through male and female biology,
Even peoples beliefs, assumptions and opine come from the hivemind I'm sounding autistic as fuck but that's my thought process.
I feel so scared. If you told women to stop dating men they would say it's impossible. So thats what I mean, women pair up with men on a mass scale and that's how society naturally looks like, women even mentally depend on these relationships. It feels patriarchal a lot of the times and since I have a self preservation then I'm just trying to protect myself especially from the hierarchies that exist in society in which I don't wanna partake lol. The stupidity of pickmes, heterosexuality and patriarchy gets tiring cause it's constant and everywhere and my view on heterosexual relationships is very critical and when I think of being in these women place I feel dread because what the fuck. It's all shitty. And these men… They don't even wanna be there most of the time so you need to have some manipulative(I dont mean that these men are the victims) social skills to beg the moid to stay

>>107492
Yeah all this behavior is very predictable if you understand male biology and how their sexuality works and all their sexual ego and sexual impulses they have, people are an individuals and you have to deal with male individual identity while being with them and in this identity they in fact desire other women meanwhile romantic relationships in this case hetero ones are based on a male sexual desire for the woman. Women are depending on the male desiring them meanwhile… These men want other women anyway so lol… It makes women become desperate to keep these men wanting them, I could call my knowledge of this a self preservation too. I don't think these men can change or become soft and I have noticed that when men try to be soft they then start to rage and overcompensate for the moments of softness even through making retarded gross jokes lol.
They constantly have to validate their masculinity and how much of an independent free fuck boy they are even whilst not single, they will lead and lead these women on cause they don't wanna settle down ever. It's usually the woman who does all the "love" and bonding work in a relationship and pushes for house and children

>>107493
>most women
I like Lana del Rey and Sylvia Plath [a racist] but I have to say this, I think that her fans exhibit histrionic traits, and a lot of them are actually toxic as fuck, and anyone who has self-respect wouldn't listen to something like this.
Some of them are proud about their issues, but I know that they also recognize that it's not healthy. I'm just saying, it's not most women. Maybe a vocal minority. Statistically 1% of world population has HPD, and even if I am being generous and say 10% suffer from pathological mental health issues that involve male validation, you still 90% of women who won't listen to trashy shit.

>There is 100% chance of abuse happening in there relationships, 100% chance of being fucked over etc.
I'm not a fan of black and white thinking but what I'm going to say is a fact: 51% of marriages in USA ends in divorce. See two happy families right now? One of them is going to fail in future. The other family? They're either going to be happy, or they're going to be swimming in enough problems that they ignore. I don't think it's actually a bad thing, but it is what it is.

I don't want to nitpick your arguments or anything, but I respect your opinions, your justification and your decision to adopt an ascetic way of life. More power to you!
Just ignore the normies and the haters. Society writes their stories for them, and they're just acting on it. Yes, they are reinforcing a patriarchal and social obligation to breed, consume and keep the pension system running, and they really want to believe in it because they now need to find something else to live for.

PS: I just wanted to comment on the Lana Del Rey shit because I used to obsess about her.

>>107496
>I'm not a fan of black and white thinking
It's self preservation in my case, even now I saw a post about a husband killing his wife, to me it was predictable. I even predicted the behavior of moids irl like my aunts husband or other men,
My aunt died and I was making what I thought at the time were schizo assumptions plus he was acting the way women would want their dream moid to act, he was crying and wouldn't stop talking about her. Just to turn into a sex pest who terrorized his whole family and confessed he hated being married

>>107505
Yes, I understand why you believe the things you do.

I can say that at least 12 marriages right in my street ended in divorce, with the moid being abusive. One moid slapped his wife so hard his hand printed on her face, and she had to run away with a baby on her hand, and now she's taking care of her child as a single mom. Another girl, a cousin, slit her wrists because her husband cheated on her. A friend's husband tortured her so much just because she was black and he was forced into marrying her, and now they're divorced. An aunt of mine kicked her husband out because he was too controlling of her and wanted her to be a tradwife. I'm not really optimistic about marriage and relationships either, but I feel scared and weak so I still want to believe that it's not always the case, but that's just me.

That's why I say you shouldn't listen to normies, even if this is an act of self-preservation, what you believe is something only someone strong will take.

>>107513
But the thing is that I can't stop listening to them, I am forced until…
Some of the things they do causes caused me harm I have to face the consequences of now,
Women as a collective are vile to individual women and punish their intellect, their trashy behavior gives me a depression that is not always my fault. Often their intelligence goes below a level a human brain should fucking go and it's fucking giving me a breakdown, like fuck the pseudo female solidarity they are engaging in and how suddenly the feminism in them awakens when it's time to gaslight smart women but the feminism doesn't exist at any other time in them. Like think for example about situations like this: some radfem groups DECADES ago were being investigated just to uncover the most embarrassing thing ever. . these women were infighting even then lol.
Women like me are very very hated by society and all people, I have people getting hysterically mad at me, pickme women join spaces where women don't want to suppress their intellect anymore and start COMPLAINING about how bad we are,
I even had a woman who is a pedophile into girls and hangs out with "maps" (even those pro SA) agreeing with a tweet that calls anti maps bigoted and extreme but she calls "blackpilled" women evil. This is just too much injustice for me to take and it's constant. I hope this whore is not here too because she certainly is in other space I posted in because these women are so fucking mad they are on a witch hunt.
Like I said, normies were dangerous to me in my life and damaged me beyond my control like for example my parents or environment irl.
I'm just giving all these people a backlash. Patriarchy is a patriarchy, not only men create it and that's a fact. It is very very painful to see other women stupidity, it makes sense to react like this and I wish people didn't stigmatize feeling down about embarrassing issues like this.
We are really as an individuals paying for other people sins very often, I know that women hate rants like this and soon I will see complaints about this post probably as always. But isn't throwing out any common sense out of the window or getting mad at reasonable opinions just cause you're for example horny for dick right now and wanna chase it for the rest of your life which requires you to be logic less, bad? Like women will gaslight other women cause they are currently horny for moids or relationships with them and lose any common sense in this trance they are lol…
And yes the pedo situation is real and I'm so insanely mad at other women because they are so contradictory.

>>107555
+At this point I just wanna be left alone by the people who know that a group of women like me exists and had a name and by people who know me as a person online and are insanely mad at me, I want people to stop complaining about women like me and the imaginary harm we do. Just stop being leeches,
Misogyny spreads like a cancer same with pickmeism.

>>107492
If you think relationships don't take work and that you'll just find someone when they're at their best and you at yours you're sorely mistaken.
The most important thing is that you set clear boundaries and the consequences for them so the other person knows not to get on your shit list.
Don't push their boundaries and have a mutual respect for what each other values and understand that your values won't always line up.

>>107611
If youre gonna post retarded bait can it atleast be funny

Simple, stop paying attention to them and pay attention to something you enjoy. Understand the difference between what you can control and what you cannot.

>>107616
They do harm on a mass scale same with men.

I just thought about something, your personality is influenced by your genetics, so these male lovers who are a handmaidens and do degrading shit to themselves, breed with males with not gentle characters and create even more monsters, male and female…

>>107585
I don't think expecting to find a guy who lacks tonsil stones and doesn't watch porn is necessarily finding someone 'at their best'. Everyone I've ever been in a relationship with has met these basic criteria.
>>107494
So I've had issues with exes relating to like, emotional avoidance, substance stuff etc. but neither ever really gave me a vibe that they wanted other women. I think some men are just whore and plenty aren't - you just have to avoid the former (and it's fairly easy to do so, just don't date people with high body counts, who follow ig people, and who look at porn - that last criteria might be harder to meet if you're in your early 20s but if you're in your late 20s-early 30s plenty of men stop watching porn of their own accord).

>>107618
Read again: things you can control =/= things you cannot control

>>107628
It doesn't make sense

>>107616
This is good life advice in general.

>>107636
Life is not a fantasy, if I can't complain about then people shouldn't complain about women like me and no suffering in the world should be seen as real if my isn't

>>107630
>>107618
People harming other people is 99% outside your control.

>>107679
So what? I should not be angry? Wtf

Moids are saying to eachother: "you are the prize!", "don't chase women" and "you deserve better" when a woman isn't acting like a slave for them, meanwhile male lovers…

>>107627
>So I've had issues with exes relating to like, emotional avoidance, substance stuff etc. but neither ever really gave me a vibe that they wanted other women.
Emotional avoidance and substance abuse aren't exactly better than wanting other women. You seem to think you got the better end of the deal but you really didn't.

>I think some men are just whore and plenty aren't
The only reason a man is not a whore is because there aren't any women willing to sleep with him. They all wish they could be whores.

>if you're in your late 20s-early 30s plenty of men stop watching porn of their own accord
Absolutely not true. If anything, they're even more desperate. Younger guys usually aren't delusional enough to think a beautiful woman on Instagram with 500K followers will sleep with them, older guys are.
All men are rotten, the sooner women realize this, the easier life will be for them.

>>107729
>Emotional avoidance and substance abuse aren't exactly better than wanting other women. You seem to think you got the better end of the deal but you really didn't.

I didn't make that comment to suggest I got the better end of the deal, I made that comment to contradict >>107494's claim that men just inherently desire other women.

>All men are rotten

I'm also not denying this, I'm just saying that it's genuinely the case that plenty of people (men and women) aren't whores, so normalizing it as inevitable is simply incorrect.

>>107680
Do you plan on getting angry for every injustice met by strangers? What does that achieve? Do you feel virtuous?

>>107732
NTA but I don't think people choose to be angry (or to have any emotion) with an orientation towards realizing some purpose. Emotions just arise as natural responses to the divergence between the reality around you and what you think it should ideally be.

You move on and focus on your own life. It's not that hard to busy yourself with education, career or hobbies/passions/interests.

>>107735
People unnecessary abuse and enslave eachother, I was abused by my retarded parent whos a woman it was demonic this is happening on a mass scale what is wrong with y'all

>>107734
Please stop spreading this tyrannical judgemental philosophy and have your own fucking mind. Yes I dont wanna be abused and abuse is not what I want reality to be so now I'm supposedly evil and have to engage in spiritual bypassing and be judged by people like you because of how evil I am

>>107738
did you reply to the wrong post?

>>107736
You can either attempt to be the revolution and live in defiance of the status quo or move on and live your life. It's up to you. If moving on and focusing on yourself isn't for you, then dedicate your life to activism nd social change and surround yourself with women who feel the same way.

>>107749
I hate you tyrants so much all you do is gaslight

What decides if someone's suffering is their fault of not can someone explain

>>107734
True, but you choose the reaction to whatever emotion arises. Otherwise there would be murder sprees for every bump against furniture.
Most posters here are young, they believe and/or live with emotions as their masters (some adults do too), while the wisdom is in knowing that you actually have a choice, and you can decide where to invest your time/emotion/energy.

>>107752
How am I a tyrant and gaslighting you for telling you to stand up for what you believe in?

>>107759
Ok abusive tyrant

I'm going to have to ramble for a bit, but…

You'll have to simply accept it as a fact of nature. A historical inevitability. Most people in this world feel most comfortable sticking to the status quo, to their predetermined place in the community, because it's the easiest thing to do; because they receive no social backlash from it, and they will do their damned best to keep that place, claw at it, lie for it, cheat for it, maime for it, kill for it. Metaphorically or literally. But as for us, who are unable to fit into this society in a way that benefits us no matter how hard we try, we kind of have no choice but to carve out our own niche space, hoping that maybe sometime in the distant future it will spread out and bloom. It's a road of deep suffering.

Think of the first feminists a few centuries ago and how villified they were by the entirety of society, YES, including women, for daring to ask for even a smidge of freedom. Well-standing women who couldn't complain because they had everything the could have asked for (except freedom lol), so of course they'd be against it, but also women cheated on by their husbands, poor women, battered women, etc. Because if they have to suffer, then so do you. Because that's the regular person's mindset: crabs in a bucket, obey the social norm, avoid social ostracization. Because for their successes to matter, it means that promiscuous women deserve to be punished, ugly women deserve to be punished, weak women deserve to be punished, emotional women deserve to be punished, women who picked the wrong man deserve to be punished, women who didn't listen to their abusive father deserve to be punished, women who didn't listen to their abusive husband deserve to be punished… Because the winners need some way to feel better than the losers. Feminists protested and fucking starved themselves for these selfish, ungrateful cunts. And they suffered, but they achieved something after all that.

>>108045
Submitting also means submitting to a brainwashing of all kinds about many kinds of things.
But in general, observing, researching and analyzing the real life and REAL human behaviours and not doing some flawed ass feminist analysis or moid pov on things etc. I uncovered terrifying things or rather got a confirmation that I'm not making shit up because what first made me scared depressed and horrified subconsciously was living the reality we exist in, I isolated and became depressed for years and I didn't knew why.
Women were slaves since always, this is a weird example but some people say that anal or sucking dick existed since always but to me it reminds that women were raped in their mouths since always or putting themselves through horrifying things and prostitution to survive. Humans sexuality exists in them 24/7 so anytime men and women were together, the rapes happened, especially the non piv ones tbh…
This is some sodomy ass shit. I spiralled out of topic but I am haunted by humanity especially it's past. I just analyzed for expl female behavior and that individual women are indeed enslaved by women as a collective and by men ofc. But the women thing… It made me lose hope cause we really have NO safe space in this world as a woman, what's women excuse for this patriarchal behavior.. It can't even be judged as survival in most cases???
Currently I think about the brainwashing we undergo even by other women and it's so sinister, not only we are born into slavery and guaranteed rape but also undergo some weird ass psychop that happens naturally through humans being humans and socializing, it spreads like cancer. I believe that volcel women should have been protected by society but womanhood rather resembles rape than anything else like being protected and cared for… And after soo many years of rape I wouldn't be surprised if the trauma isn't in our DNA and if women don't associate fear with arousal as a self protective mechanism but on the other hand, the female biology cannot be not designed as a pickme cause then humanity wouldn't be conceived. I just wish I were safe since birth and the brutality was a choice. Humans are evil sometimes like they even fucking invented torture devices to torture eachother wtf. But the patriarchy conceived naturally is he most terrorizing thing so far… Maybe especially because of the mental side of it all and the biological gender roles. And IRL.. If I ignored the issues instead of being angry then I would have submitted to a brainwashing by my environment…
I feel above it all, like I don't need most of this brutality to feel something or realize profound things about life, as if a person time travelled back in time and didn't fit in with the collective. The only thing that gives me comfort is me being conceived that if a woman like me gets born into earth, she will kill herself early on. I didn't do it in this lifetime cause I live in a modern world after the year 2000 and not in a shithole country enslaved in some religious or other type of scary structures however I am and was still pretty enslaved especially by my mother who just sabotaged my existence plus she's religious.
Most people feel empty after a vent like this and will blame ME for it or just cause they are safe on this exact moment then all of it is an exaggeration…

>>108049
You're spiralling. There are awful, disgusting people in this world, I agree, but there is also good. I realize that you're just venting and you're not in a state of mind to think calmly or clearly, but believe me that you are equipped to survive. There are people out there who are like you, who hold the same beliefs. There are social structures built for the sake of the well-being of society, if not in your country, then elsewhere where you can one day move. You have a rational brain, you have your own morals to guide you, your life experience, and even your emotions are a valid way to help figure out what is dangerous or detrimental to you. You can say fuck you to your mother and the shitty cunts that surround you and find a different way to live. It'll all pass and it'll be okay.

>>108051
Didn't ask for a gaslighting ignorant response calling me a craze.

Accurately analyzing how severe the brainwashing women do to eachother is and getting old you're exaggerating is point proven, I'm not trying to infight, I have been called crazy for years but i just express reasonable opinions however humans are evil and ignorant. Online I associate women with aggressive behavior and responses that call you psychotic for just being smart, like I used to go on facebook groups full of 14-21yo girls and women when I was a young teen and get attacked by a swarm of aggressive women for saying valid things like criticizing them for wanting to be slapped during sex. Once they did something cruel to me, I vented about seeing a video of rape and they asked for "link"

>>108066
Do you think that women in groups behave the same way to reason as individuals would?

I can't exist knowing something as rape exists. I can't exist knowing rapist suckers exist and don't deserve me explaining myself to them but I'm forced. I can't exist knowing a raped women will keep sucking moids or be surrounded by rapist suckers who worship men.

I used to be a total pickme. Once I was crushing super hard on this total incel, I thought we were a total match and that I could fix him. He did not like me at all. Thought my pickme nature was a total turn off and that I was total push over.
That really broke me out of my pickme phase.

I long for the world before "pickme" was a word

>>117447
As always, the internet has taken a word and stripped it of all its original meaning. "Pickme" used to actually mean something. Now it's used as a random insult against women one disagrees with. Oh well.

>>117463
I doubt it ever meant something. The term itself just seems nonsensical. I don't know what to make of it, except that it is meant as something negative, but i can't quite pinpoint what that might be exactly.
Is being in a relationship considered the bad thing here?
Or wanting to be in a relationship the bad thing?
Or is liking someone enough to do something about it the bad thing?
Is being straight the bad thing?
Or is there some hidden form of hierarchy among women and the actual problem was cutting in line?
Are women only opposed to be passive, is that the message?

>>117464
It means centering men and viewing other women as competition subconsciously and acting on that belief. It's not about women who "want to be in relationships" because a straight women can bag a moid without throwing other women under the bus or doing humiliation rituals in order to get him to like her.

I get you’re frustrated, but it sounds like you’re exhausting yourself by constantly obsessing over “pick me” women. You’re stuck in a cycle of anger, and it’s honestly just making you miserable for no reason. If you hate seeing this stuff, stop filling your head with it and move on. It’s pointless to be this upset when you can just avoid them and live your life. No need to let them take up so much space in your mind.

I get you’re frustrated, but it sounds like you’re exhausting yourself by constantly obsessing over “pick me” women. You’re stuck in a cycle of anger, and it’s honestly just making you miserable for no reason. If you hate seeing this stuff, stop filling your head with it and move on. It’s pointless to be this upset when you can just avoid them and live your life. No need to let them take up so much space in your mind.

>>108066
>criticizing them for wanting to be slapped during sex.
It's strange that you would criticise them for that, that doesn't affect you or any other person besides the parties who are having sex with consensual slapping.

>>117541
just like how being a tranny doesn't affect anyone yet it's still not normal and shouldn't be encouraged. stfu

>>107848
That Emperors wife cheated on him and he humbly forgave her, the fuck is wrong with you? Should he have raped his mother like Caligula and kicked her down the stairs when he found out she was pregnant instead?

>>107469
>It's all just evil

i don't think you are crazy, this is the voice of sanity asking you to remain sane in a currputed world that asks you to either be a puppet or a rapist.

the way to deal with it i believe to be this: while the world falls deeper and deeper into illusion, you remain rooted in reality. currently it is a reality where you don't have community. emphasis on currently. there is no telling what happens to you in the future so better be ready. stay healthy, keep working on developing good habits and learn how to do everything yourself until you dont have to anymore.