thread for those with quiet bpd Anonymous 109502
hi girls. here’s a thread to vent/share your experiences with quiet bpd.
for me, i’m tired of feeling like an ocean. i’m tired of feeling everything so deeply all the time. i’m tired of never feeling happy, content, or at peace with myself. i’m tired of always feeling misunderstood. i’m tired of always looking for happiness through external means and never through my own presence. i’m tired of latching onto whoever or whatever i think can provide my happiness. i’m tired of looking to relationships to provide all my good feelings. i’m tired of feeling terribly threatened by the potential loss of any thing or person i think provides my happiness. i’m tired of loving people incapable of loving me back. i’m tired of how deeply i hate myself. i’m tired of consuming myself.
Im sorry nona, i hope you get better!
I’ve fully accepted I will never be loved. I’m so fucking retarted I ruin absolutely everything with guys. Not even attractive men, I just settle for the bare minimum so maybe they’re less likely to leave. I’m not ugly either, and I’ve been told I’m pretty and attractive on numerous occasions. Finding men who don’t want to just have sex and leave is impossible. I wish I was gay literally all I want is a boyfriend I can just vent to who can reassure me that I’m loved. I’ll probably never get that because unfortunately I’m fucking insane and I scare them all away. Two different guys asked me out on a date and both ghosted me before the date. I don’t know what I did I’m just so hurt and tired. I didn’t even tell them I was mentally ill I probably just did or said something that gave it away. They probably found someone better or prettier or more normal I just hate myself so fucking much.
I just really hate having it. I hate having these little bursts of anger that make no sense. Then I’ll just cry because I feel like a horrible person. No one really understands cause you’re suppose to be able to control yourself and most of the time you can. Then you just slip up. You have to be so in control all the time. Take your meds everyday, don’t seek at male attention you have a bf (even if you feel so insecure you could rip your own skin off),smile smile, don’t lose your temper and get so angry you cry.
bpd is an excuse to be a cunt lmao