/feels/ - Advice & Venting

OP
Half Vent Half Question.

I just want some moid who is self aware enough to think about what they do and feel. To not just be some simple mouth breather who just takes things as they come and never asking why. This isn't even the usual shit like 'oh why don't moids love us' 'why don't moids feel'

Because they do, but the overwhelming majority of them are just too stupid and unaware to even think about emotions or anything underlying. I don't even know if it's biological or society that's dooming them. I've seen it happen with us as well, but it just seems so much more there in the moids.

I am happy with who I am, what I do, just my life in general. But I just don't like the idea of being alone, but I hate the idea of just getting with some emotionally stunted monkey to fill the void even more. If I could I'd happily rip out the part of me that wants a partner and just toss it into a fire.

Is there even any moid out there that's capable of what I want? Should I compromise with reality? I don't think I'm asking for anyone perfect or anything, just some moid that's aware enough to go 'man humans are stupid and emotions are dumb.'

>>111135
>Is there even any moid out there that's capable of what I want
Philosophy majors probably, or any moid who has read philosophy that isn't just Marcus Aurelius.

This isn't exclusively a moid problem, it's a human problem. I'd wager that propaganda has become so sophisticated that people cannot step outside of themselves and understand why they are the way they are. Like, there's this whole thing now where womens' sports is being pushed, and sure it's great that women are given these opportunities, but I still don't care about sports. So why are they trying to make us care about sports? Opening up another market? Maybe there's a little money to be had, but I think more pertinently it's just so that 40-something house-wives tolerate their husbands' sports fixation a little bit more, which means tolerating the drinking and smoking and gambling just a little bit more. "It's normal for him to like sports;" as normal as wage-slavery, obesity, and rent. Typically what is 'normal' is what conforms with the images and stories we are presented.

We accept the stories around us because questions are penalised. Take a recent example I've experienced
>Why do women wear makeup?
>because it makes us feel good (lacking emotional cognition)
>it makes you feel good in the same way that not getting shit hurled at you makes you feel good. You are penalised for not wearing makeup, and so you've associated the feeling of being not penalised with "feeling good," when in reality being 'not penalised' should be the default state that should not require any effort. We have thus made a false compromise that favours men; they get to have their makeup sales and pretty dolls, we get to have more expenses, less time, and less autonomy with how we present ourselves.

At this point I'm normally accused of having internal misogyny for pointing out the obvious - we wear makeup for men. Maybe we don't know it's for men, but at the end of the day it's men who run the propaganda machine, and if a large swath of people are all doing a thing, it's generally not a coincidence. But we ignore this last point, because the idea that the things you do are a result of mass propaganda is "scary".

Another example that gets most men is the notion of "efficiency". Why do you want to be efficient? What is efficiency to you? How can one even be 'efficient' without a specific end goal? They're ignorant of how prevalent 'efficiency' is in culture, and how regularly it's presented as the default. How regularly men are tricked to think that their primary purpose in life is to do the thing as quickly and goodly as possible. Again, it's propagandists, usually men, at the top pulling the strings. Why is it important I do the thing quickly and goodly? Why is it important I do it at all? Wouldn't it be nicer if I enjoyed life? Wouldn't it be nicer if I took a moment to think about the ramifications of what I'm doing? You want everything to come to you quickly, but then there would be no sense of achievement because if something comes quickly then that's really having the thing come with minimal work. I'm kinda not going to go much more into this because the efficiency critiques are fairly prevalent on the net.

>>111135
The majority of the population, male and female, are not capable of introspection. We simply learn to be more mindful of others, and by extension ourselves, as children because of the way girls socialise and, just as importantly, bully each other. Moids who are capable of introspection are already so stunted by childhood and adolescent behaviours that by adulthood they see sensitivity and emotional depth as weakspots others can exploit, not anything valuable. Worryingly, men capable of introspection that remain sensitive and emotional also tend find more success in interpersonal relationships with women than men, and so become better, even reflexive, manipulators who subconsciously target women because it boosts their ego and self-worth.

I have a moid who's capable of self-reflection, but is so cut off from his own emotional needs that he requires outside stimulation to recognise them in others. He has to set calendar reminders to do something romantic and timers to remind him to give me physical affection, because he's so programmed to ignore those things that he simply can't spontaneously think to give them to the people he loves.

>>111134
Because it is stamped out of them by bourgeois society.
Given it's goal of ever increasing profits, porky tends to push to optimize society to it's needs. In the case of males, this means having the largest mass of labour possible: a people of worker ants that will follow orders.
This in turn means that aspects that are unimportant to the needs of the bouj such as emotional cognition, self-care, etc are repressed or otherwise disincetivized in favour of traits which are more functional to production like competition, hierarchy-cuckery, "stoicism" etc.
Of course not all aspects of the emotional experience can be repressed, notably those that arise from exploitation like anger, but in general porky tends to try redirect those towards it's needs.

>>111134
It's not societal. You either have emotional intelligence or you don't.

>>111134
This is tangential, but I think if you find him, he'll be offline. It seems like everything online is either ragebait, propaganda, or both. The longer you spend online, the more likely it is that original thoughts are replaced by circular rage-inducing thoughts, and by thought-terminating cliches; the more likely it is that, upon hearing someone's experiences, you dismiss it and put someone in a box instead of empathizing or thinking about what they said.
But not spending much time online still doesn't make someone intelligent. A moid who is self-aware enough to regulate his own emotions and break unhealthy patterns of thought probably puts conscious effort into maintaining his physical and mental health. He probably has hobbies instead of reading internet ragebait, and probably reads books and is curious about the world. Maybe you should go flirt with guys at your local library or something lol. But no one is at the library anymore; it's like a ghost town whenever I visit.

>>111135
The men you're looking for exist, but they're ugly.