>>119127yea nona i know you dont want to hear us say this but it sounds like grief & trauma is coloring your vision of this man. he chose the drugs over you, he spent his last day partying recklessly with 'friends' and then he left you to deal with the trauma. you need prioritize yourself over his memory.
being 24 and 'never learning' the correlation between actions & consequences is very typical of a junkie moid. you are mimicking his behavior by chalking the consequences of his actions to 'the stars' but the fact is however sweet he was, in time this quality would have reared its ugly head and you would have been left to pick up the pieces. it just happened now instead of later. trust me, 'childlike' men are the most destructive men i have ever encountered.
ive lost loved ones to similar circumstances. i knew a very sweet man who, after multiple recovery attempts, died at the same age and left behind a newborn. even with all the nuance of addiction the fact is ultimately he chose the drugs over his baby, my grandma chose drugs over my mother, and so on.
you have to think of it this way and accept it to move on. not to hold any grudge against him, but genuinely to make peace and move on. the earth didnt lose an angel, you're the angel
