Lonely life Anonymous 119497
Who would have known. Turns out that my paranoid unhealthy bullshit is a detriment to my character. I have lost my only true close friend because of a falling out and it seems that I have lost contact with them so no matter how much I want to try to make amends, it won't happen. It takes a lot of conscious effort for me to truly be close to someone because I am scared of not being in control of my feelings and letting my paranoid delusions get to me, and I thought maybe this would be different despite the issues between us (we both don't have the best mental health.) But it turns out, not really. I've always been isolated from my peers ever since childhood. I don't work; I got an informal job before but my cognition wasn't up to it. My hobbies are mostly isolated like drawing and writing. I've always had a lonely life. Friends come and go, but it seems they always go in the most painful ways possible. I always had looming dread whenever I had this close relationship, even when my friend was as nice and understanding as possible, like I was not enjoying it at all or being conflicted about being happy or scared. But at least despite that, I was a bit more in control of my emotions and my friend made me smile a lot. But now, everything is a mess. It might take a while to be more stable, but this is nothing new to me. Maybe I should just keep to myself more, and I should just be more accepting of an isolated life.
Anonymous 119512
>>119497shit nona, seems from what I read we have the same issue. I'm paranoid schizo. I don't have many people because I shut everyone out. When I do allow someone in, I am quick to ruin it because of my paranoid episodes that they are out to get me like everybody else. I was a lonely child growing up, had early diagnoses of conditions that impaired my ability to stabilize and understand my emotions. Nobody enjoys being around me because one wrong word can and will set me off into extreme distrust and make me spiral. Everyone feels as if they are walking on eggshells around me. I'm working on this issue with my partner. Your paranoia is just that, paranoia. Whatever happens, happens and that is what needs to be accepted. It's true that everything happens for a reason. I wish you luck!
Anonymous 119513
I used to have the same issue. Getting a bf cured my loneliness, no joke.
Anonymous 119552
>>119513I don't want a boyfriend. I don't think I'll even want a friend.
Anonymous 119789
ticktok.jpg
>>119513NTA moids can only take so much.
I lost mine due to my paranoid episodes.
I also lacked confidence completely so we had little to no sex life.
I am my own worst enemy
Anonymous 119952
>>119513>be me>too lonely to interact with other people and get a bf>can't get bf to cure loneliness>the cycle continues >fuck Anonymous 119971
My ex bf was my best friend before and after we broke up. We stayed really close for like a year after the breakup. He had girlfriends and it never became a problem until now. He got a new girlfriend and he barely talks to me. I get paranoid and freak out on him and he just says he’s busy. That he got in touch with old friends and so he just has less time to yap with me but when he was single he had a lot more free time. But he still wants to be my friend and likes talking to me. How am I actually supposed to take that? He talks to his old friends more so he talks to me a lot less. So I’m less important. I freak out and I know I’m just making things worse but I can’t help it. I’m so lonely now. I just liked being apart of his life still. Moids are never the cure to loneliness they just make it worsen
Anonymous 119972
>>119971Plus side his girlfriend is short and over 200 pounds. Thinking about how fat and disgusting she is, is the only remedy to my pain.
Anonymous 120024
>>119971do you think his new gf might be uncomfy with him having close female friends or something?
Anonymous 120044
>>120024I genuinely couldn’t care less. I’m sure she does. She’s a hog. If she wasn’t uncomfortable. It would be a shock. That’s not my problem. We have been best friends for 7 years. It’s not my fault she’s a void of a human being. She never developed a personality outside of her last bf. So now instead of developing a personality outside of her last relationship she’s just latching on to his personality. Within a month of dating she bought him tickets to Vegas. I can’t imagine being that desperate and I think it’s pathetic. She lives four hours away and she comes down every week and spends like 4 days at his house. Again imagine lacking an identity to the point you can spend that much time in someone else’s space, especially a moids space. She’s a turbo Reddit liberal who fucking does that moon water shit. So basically I hate her as a person and also because I don’t get to talk to him as much. Like if I met her under different circumstances I would still think she’s a pathetic hog. Who’s desperate for male attention.
