/feels/ - Advice & Venting

I have never known love, so all marriages are super lovey dovey and idealistic from my warped perspective. Although if I had to guess, the reason they don’t work out is because they were founded on lust or desperation rather than love. Also people change. Sometimes you may mature and realize your partner is no good for you and you don’t have the will to make it work. Sometimes, they grow into a worse person and the relationship is unsustainable. True love is rarer than rubies, and sometimes you just aren’t fortunate enough or a good enough person to get it.

>>121601
Because the first stages of love literally wire you to ignore issues. Because over time things that weren’t an issue can become one. Because things like strokes can literally change a personality. I could go on, but point is people can’t actually predict the future.

>>121601
A lot of "couples" don't really love each other beyond some basic sexual attraction, they're just going through the motions that they think is expected in a relationship to satisfy their own egos. "Marriage" is just one of the motions they go through if they're older than 28. For a minority of people, marriage is a very real thing, but not for most people.

Your brain keeps changing and evolving as you get older. The younger you are, the faster you change. People are expected to marry young…

It's a recipe for disaster. You will change. He will change. You divorce if lucky. If unlucky you end up stuck hating each other in a loveless performative measure with cheating as your only personal outlet.

My dad cheats but will not divorce because he thinks it will be the social death of my mother and that is more cruel to her than being cheated on. This was true maybe like 30 years ago not right now. My mother stays because they own stuff together and dividing it is a waste of money. The marriage was over back in 2019-2020 but the illusion must continue.

>>121617
If you ever hear my mother talk about love , marriage and kids you will get the feeling that you are talking to an unmarried woman in her mid 20s waiting for the right man.

A lot of moids marry with an implicit desire to cheat. Sometimes, they do it because they're too unattractive for regular hookups. Sometimes, they genuinely believe that it's somehow okay when moids do it.

thats why my bf proposed to sign a contract upon marriage that will make him bankrupt if he cheats or mistreats me

Because modern marriage has no purpose beyond the personal satisfaction of a hedonist.
Since the hormonal high of the romance inevitably flattens out and coexisting with other people does not work that way, this implicitly reduces relationships into a disposable accessory of self-indulgence.

>>123248
And historical marriage was totally all about love and not social mobility…

>>121601
the people who marry are not the people who question things, the people who marry are the ones who blindly do what other people did before them, blindly assuming that the people before had valid reasons that still make sense to this day. they just do it because they believe in normality and marrying is normal.

the more i question the more i know this: normal people will suffer, they are unconscious. they don't think things through, they don't keep up with developments in culture, they don't re-evaluate after a change, they don't think for themselves, they want the shortcut so bad that they don't care where the shortcuts leads them towards.

if you look hard you can probably find a marriage that works, i haven't seen one that wasn't a good looking but deeply rotten miniature-version of the mindless imperialism that is the root of all evil where either one or both participants in were suffering and just hanging in because they were trying to be a good sport.

>>123264
no one gives a fuck about sane men. marry insane men and get what you want out of them

>>123265
based

>>123252
thank u for this reminder

>>121601
Its because they're having sex before they get married.
Sex clouds their judgement and they spend less time talking and more time just satisfying themselves.
How can you know if you mesh well with someone if you have sex with them, it's like trying to take make good decisions while drunk.

>>124641
This is terrible advice. Sex doesn't work like that you fucking retard. You'd know if anyone wanted to have sex with your ugly ass.

It's because of birth control and pornography. Both of these things divorce sex from its intended purpose in marriage.

marriage is misogynistic bullshit so ofc the ppl who participate in it are gonna act retarded

>Shouldn't they know
Nobody will know that the job that they just got hired into is going to suck and make them miserable.

>>121603
>Although if I had to guess, the reason they don’t work out is because they were founded on lust or desperation rather than love.
the killer combo is lust from the man and desperation from the woman. the woman is already unhappy before the marriage even starts, and the man becomes unhappy soon after because the woman shuts down sex. in those cases there really should be some kind of corrective seminar for both parties to at least prevent that they end up in the same situation again later.

>>125212
getting a man to guarantee you access to his resources forever or until YOU decide you don't need him any more is misogynistic bullshit?

>>121601
What makes you think people truly know each other before having children? What makes you think people don't change ? Marriage is the worst institution left of the patriarchy it's a scam sold to women by men. Don't get caught up in it. The woman always pays the price.

>>125313
Women must ALWAYS perceive themselves as the victim.

Even when stealing money from a man who's completely helpless to stop her a woman must cry about unfair the situation is to HER, and how the world owes even MORE or else it's being sexist.

>>125314
>The woman always pays the price.
Which is?

>>125316
Virtually everything about living with a moid is disastrous for a woman. Self explanatory.

>>125315
Because they're more likely to be raped discriminated, treated like shit, taken advantage of by men who only want sex. Do the math. Of course we think you're filth 90% of the time. If you don't like the way other men make you look change the trash male culture.

>>125317
That's not an answer.

>>125321
It's just self evident they're domestic/life energy parasites. You can do the math on your own if you're not a man. You actually need it spelled out ?

>>125323
No fault divorce and alimony means there is literally zero downside to getting married as a woman. You can end it at any time for any reason and the government forces the man to give you half his money for the rest of his life or else go to prison.

Please tell me how the woman is the scam victim in this arrangement.

>>125324
Having thrown away any portion of you life to live with a scrote parasite is the colossal loss. if they wasted even a portion of their life to domestic slave labor, child reading. Jesus fucking Christ especially if the woman got pregnant ???? Might as well assume your life is in the gutter if you're that woman. You have essentially destroyed her life and she should throw you in a human meat grinder as punishment, not get paid. Payment doesn't even cover it. They should honestly just cut off your dick AND take the money.


Marriage to those life sucking parasites is a fucking scam money doesn't cover the damage remotely.

Get it through your worthless fucking head. Everything about a scrote is a liability if you have to live with them. EVERYTHING. You are not the catch you think you are you are more akin to a potential tapeworm coming to destroy my life if you're male. ROFL the fact that you think money even matters is cute

We are essentially avoiding 99.999 % of you shits. It's akin to getting cancer to live with a moid.

>>125336
>domestic slave labor

What,doing chores? Laundry and dishes? Tasks you'd already also have to do even if you're single?

That's your idea of slavery and torture? You sound like a very spoiled and whiny person.

>>125339
Hell no I'm not talking about that. That shit is damn near fun to do when you live alone. A moid is basically a full grown demanding entitled child that multipli a every horrible thing x10. Makes your life a guaranteed living hell. And then the added horror of children ??? Virtually all the women I've known endure the same thing living with one. Their life quality took a giant nosedive they became shells of themselves.

You couldn't pay me a million dollars to put up with a sack of shit like that. You only bitch that I'm "spoiled" because I'd have nothing to do with you taking over my existence and pretending everything under the sun belongs to your insufferable parasitic ass. Commandeering every bit of joy and sucking it out of my life. Holy shit I would chase your worthless ass out of my house with a portable wood chipper so fast I'm not even kidding.