/feels/ - Advice & Venting

break up with him nona. feeling a bit of attraction for other girls is one thing, but being blatant and not caring about your feelings on it is another. it doesn't matter whether it's a celebrity or an everyday girl. you deserve someone to feel like you are irreplaceable.

Fucking hell. The amount of shit women put themselves through for mediocre moids is insane. Nona this man is a loser and he clearly has no respect for you.

girl dump him

>>123129
This.

>i wish it didn’t get to me, but it does.

that's because deep down you believe humans to be property.

>>123128
What kind of hot egirls? I mean simping for onlyfans girls is one thing just looking at p*rn is another

Stop being insecure. And at least he's honest

Now the real question is if he'd cheat given the opportunity. If yes dump him
If no then come on, it's natural to be attracted to people, like you can't turn a switch off. And honesty is good too unless he humiliates you

From what you wrote it's unclear if the dude is a coomer or not

>>123173
>I mean simping for onlyfans girls is one thing just looking at p*rn is another

this might be the most ignorant thing i ever read here.

>>123173
nah
nona deserves someone who doesn't disrespect her

Posts like this are why I steadfastly maintain that most men in relationships with women deserve to be cheated on. There is absolutely nothing loyal about the average male. Anyone who says this is normal, acceptable behavior is lying and coping. There’s nothing insecure about not wanting a partner who claims to be loyal to you whilst drooling over softcore porn and scantily clad women all day. Don’t ever let men, or the average cuckolded woman shut you down with the whole “you’re just a jealous, controlling woman, blah blah, stop being insecure” thing. These are words used to silence you for being rightfully upset about men’s warped entitled ideas about relationships, loyalty and women as a whole.

>>123173
Repeatedly telling her how attracted he is to other women despite her clearly not liking it is pretty humiliating don't you think?

>>123180
Are you a cheater? If yes this is peak rationalisation

Just dump the guy, why drop even lower than him?
>>123177
Do you break up with men the moment you learn they watch porn?
Assuming you're into men.
>>123178
Sure. But does he actually disrespect her? That's unclear from the OP

What do all of you want even? For a guy to hide and lie that he finds other women good looking? Or a schizo that only finds 1 woman out of 4000000000 good looking?
My ex used to constantly tell me that I'm the hottest girl in the world (I'm average at best) and that he doesn't need anyone else. Is that what you want? He cheated on me. Go figure.

I genuinely don't understand you all. Do you assume the guy mentioned in the OP is a cheater? Or what he did is already cheating?

>>123186
Does he know that she doesn't like that however? I've reread the OP twice. Nothing suggests this.

Btw I trashtalk my bf all the time, it's just friendly banter, but any banter can be framed as an insult. You see where I'm going?

However regardless of OP bf being a jerk or not OP is clearly insecure and can't defend herself

>>123193
I'm sorry about your story if it's true, but it doesn't follow from it that a bf being honest like this is better.
It only means he feels that expressing his admiration for someone he isn't dating is more of a priority than not inflicting pain on your partner.
This is very disrespectful, obviously, unless he's stupidly oblivious and doesn't realize this is bad.

>>123195
He might be oblivious, depends on how obvious it is and if OP confronted him on it.
It's also possible that OP is a massive pushover and gets bullied which is a she problem. Though she should dump him in that case as she ruined her reputation in his eyes and he'll never respect her

And thanks but no need to be sorry, it's good that my ex cheated, it's important to get cheated on as early as possible so that you don't waste your time

>>123197
bitch get off OP's case lmao

>>123198
Lol don’t bother with this cuck. I wanna assume this is a male but you can never be sure with the amount of women who actually think like this these days. It’s pretty amusing that these people get to call girls like OP insecure when they’re the ones that let their partners openly drool over other ppl. Embarrassing projection.

>>123199
Just have boundaries

>>123199
And yeah, OP is clearly insecure, she's not even hiding it
Are you implying she isn't?
And by your logic she is the cuck here.
Sorry, you don't make sense.

Set up boundaries, don't tolerate bs from moids, be confident and everything will be fine. I'm ok with my bf looking at porn, that makes me evil? If anything the opposite would make me abusive in my eyes. At least I would never tolerate cheating, frankly unlike most women who are getting abused daily

>>123203
Implying a woman is abusive for being upset her boyfriend watches porn is absolutely unhinged. That’s not confidence. It’s emotional numbness dressed up as empowerment. There’s nothing secure about tolerating disrespect and calling it growth. That’s just coping. This will be the start and end of my engagement with you. Buh bye now cucky.

>>123204
I'm not implying that? You can be upset, that's normal.
But calling people insecure and coping if porn isn't a dealbreaker in a relationship is too much, even if it is a dealbreaker for you, which again, is ok

And to understand if you're insecure or not think about what exactly makes you upset about moids acting like that. What's the cause of your frustration. I actually don't know which answer you'll come to but don't shrug it off and give it a proper thought

>>123199
Can you even imagine what the conversation would go like if the genders were reversed
People would call OP a cuck a bit but only because he still hasn't burned the gf at the stake
Not actually trying to burn OP at the stake himself for being insecure or whatever lol

>>123206
Uhh. That's not how it would go at all?

>liking other girls
depends on how he acts about it + it he's hypocritical about you liking other people
>follows hot egirls
nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope

He's allowed to see other women, but needs to recognize he's not their man.

I would keep trying as long as i can. Theres bound to be someone id hope

you are allowed to think / aknowledge someone is physically good-looking while in a relationship and you'll always do this subconciously anyway.
but actually talking to your partner about how you find other people attractive and specific ones in particular in a serious tone is hurtful and not really something you should do.
im sure your bf would take issue with it if you started talking about how you find a particular cashier or coworker attractive.

>>123128
you should probably not take advice from people who think this is normal

>>123646
i second this. men and women, especially nowadays. will justify and normalize openly disrespectful and lustful behavior just to prove how “secure” they are. very strange performative behavior. it’s no wonder they can’t maintain long-term healthy relationships.

>>123128
Not every guy, but in vast majority of cases, yes, you can't change it. The only exception here are the religious guy who learned to subdue their lust becuase they fear God and becuase they're thought that the purpose of marriage is to make their wives holy, not fulfil their sexual desires.
Men suffer from lust very much, over 90% consuming porn on a daily basis, and while they can't prevent sexual thoughts from appearing, only some choose to not engage in them and ignore the intrusive thoughts as soon as possible beucase they love their partner.
So yeah, in vast majority of cases you have to accept it, becuase the world has rejected God and its consequences are showing.

You can be however you wanna be I guess, but the general tone itt sounds kinda angry and insecure. In our case, we look at both genders and judge them as entertainment. Both good and bad. Nice set, lumpy butt, awesome clothes, pot belly, great nose, stinky perfume or b.o. - anything is fair game. It's also okay to TALK to other people! You can make somebody feel good about themselves without dating them or betraying your partner.
Who cares? We're banging each other because we already know each other, and we sure as hell aren't going to go touching strangers just because they only have a nice ass or said something flattering or whatever. Our actual sex is good enough that we don't need to look for it elsewhere. We are secure in each other and trust each other. But we still have the eyes to see both art and fart anywhere it lingers.

>>123128
Mine never looks at other girls, not online or in person. He refuses to even admit when a girl is pretty

Before you dump him, you should start following a bunch of huge sexy muscular guys and see what he says

>>123193
>Do you break up with men the moment you learn they watch porn?
Yes
>Sure. But does he actually disrespect her?
Yes
>I genuinely don't understand you all. Do you assume the guy mentioned in the OP is a cheater? Or what he did is already cheating?
Yes

So you got cheated on by a guy who lied about being monogamous? So all guys who want monogamy are cheaters?

If a woman did half that shit to a moid, he would cry about being cucked and emasculated

>>123205
Why does he need porn if he's in a relationship with you? Are you guys not fucking or what?

>>123210
How would it go then?
>Guyyyys my gf follows big muscular black porn stars on Twitter and talkes about them a lot

>>123786
I mean, it's ok if it works for you and all, but it should be kinda obvious it won't for most people for obvious reasons and they aren't bad or wrong for it. You trying to change our mind and taking offense at "insecurity" kinda reeks of reaction formation tbh. Who actually gives a fuck about other people's lumpy butts or great noses lol??

>>123128
what about doing the same to him? talk to him with the same kind of verbiage about men you find attractive. put on a movie with some of your favorite actors and gush about them when they're on screen.

>>123788
Every men, and I mean every single mem watch porn. Yes, even monks.

And if you want a men who isn't attracted to women, you need to find ah homo. What is wrong if he is attracted to other women as log as he is faithful and love only you?

>>123128
Will your bf have that part of his mind that think a certain girl is pretty? Sure, yeah. You too probably see guys you think are attractive. Cheating is another thing.

Him following those girls on ig is weird asf, especially since I assume he does not know them. It's most likely an insecurity things for him like he wants attention from them in some way for some reason bc maybe he feels less than. There's really no reason for him to follow a girl who just posts hot pics. My bf doesn't follow any girls but me (that's extreme) but just to show u guys who are all about u exist

>>124258
that's a lot of seething out of nowhere

>>124261
>Complains about something done by a woman, in this case it's a generalizing statement
>Does the same thing in the same breath
If this wasn't the most moid behavior I've ever seen

kek i'm sorry girl, your thread got invaded by porn addicted troons, they think it's normal because other troons do and men do not have monogamous same sex relationships, so here they come all the AGPs saying it's totes valid to watch porn and be a cuck

>>123128
Many times I catch myself saying some random celebrity is hot, I try to keep it to a minimum but I have been doing it so long it rolls off the tongue and my moid doesn't seem bothered, he will say something about how many crunches he does at the gym and still can't get a 6 pack.

He may not understand how you feel. Maybe you should dump that zero and get yourself a hero, hun, or maybe it is not worth ending a relationship over and you should just talk to him first. Depends on the details, which you have more knowledge about than us.

let me start out by stating that no, it is not normal that he cannot at the very least keep this despicable behavior private. i will say that in my experience, it is rather normal that he lusts after other women.
for that reason, i don't think it's worth it to get close to someone. not close enough that it break me if they were looking at other women.
in my experience no one has ever loved me the way i need to be loved, because they don't exist to serve me. they only exist to serve their own wants and needs, and by and large, their own wants are for duplicitous and adulterous actions.