/feels/ - Advice & Venting

>spend the rest of my life spending my NEETbux on Hello Kitty Island Adventure furniture, watching my mom's Gilmore Girls DVD's and cryibg?
I think this is lowkey what led to the current dating situation. Most people are socially stunted and everyone thinks they have autism because they spend too much time gaming or whatever. It's not a judgement against you nona, of course, but I think the best thing you can do is try to socialize with people anyway. Not in the sense like overlook everyone's personal faults and date them anyway, but in the sense that you need to get curious about people and become more discerning for what you need and who can give you that. Permanently backing off into a fantasy world is dangerous and less healthy.

I went the hikki route, fun in its way but gets very anxious around 30

A male relative of me had sex with many girls on Tinder but all his relationships resulted in nothing and now he's single agaaaain and hates women. He himself is as superficial and bland as the girls he goes after and he did make an Instagram and do looksmaxxed and worked out really hard to impress them.
tl;dr I think it has more to do with the awful dating apps by Match Group than with the genders themselves.
And people who aren't stupid and shallow are very rare in general. It's like a few people in a hundred. It really makes me suffer.

>>125006
I think that there's more who aren't shallow, but the problem is how isolated everyone is in their lives. People are way more curt and less trusting nowadays. It makes it harder to get past the fronts people put on.

I've been approached by similar boys. Unfortunately, while a lot of guys have been doing pickup artist nonsense, a lot of decent polite men have absorbed the "asking a woman out = sexual harassment" thing.

Sooooo if the men aren't doing it anymore- it's up to you. YOU be the one to approach and ask them out. Obviously don't be a creep. Just a "Hey, you seem pretty cool, want to hang out some time?"

>>125007
>I think that there's more who aren't shallow
No, they like drinking or drugs, eating in restaurants, Netflix, travel, casual sex etc. and see relationships as a mere exchange of goods and services.
>but the problem is how isolated everyone is in their lives.
Yes, I haven't even met any people irl since I quit school. I don't know how too. Even in school I didn't know how to talk to them since we shared nothing.
>People are way more curt
Yes
>and less trusting nowadays.
No, they are too trusting in general. Maybe it's their judgement on who to trust that's off.
>It makes it harder to get past the fronts people put on.
Yes

Thank you everyone for the replies!

>>125002
>Permanently backing off into a fantasy world is dangerous and less healthy
Ouch you got me, maybe more of my personality came through in my post than I thought?

without going too too deep into my story, I got rejected by friend groups a few times when I was smol and that hurt a lot, and after that I spent a long time living in my own head and made up friends in there who love me the way I'd like to be loved
and I feel like doing that for such a long time has made it a bit harder for me to do things other people seem to do a lot more easily, like accepting real people with their flaws and just enjoying being in other people's company even if they're not my best best bosom friends, and um, find people around me more interesting than the scenarios and romances I can make happen in my own world from the comfort of sweet solitude

>>125003
Me too sorta? Not for quite that long though
Basically for a couple years after high school I had a job but one where I didn't have to talk to anybody and I spent most of my free time playing vidya or reading books and getting my social interaction on dumblr, until one day I decided i was going to try one more time to find out if love and friendship were things I could have, and went to uni

I'm doing a lot better now and I've made some friends I really like at uni, and now I'm a bit less of a walking disaster than I was a few years ago. Building social confidence is so hard though
I'm really slow with jokes and I think I'm too serious and I'm that friend who doesn't really say much and just kind of smiles, but some people seem to kind of like having me around anyway?

>>125006
>>125007
I feel like there are a lot of people who really are just genuinely shallow, but then there are also people who are very very insecure and they try to hide their fear of showing people the real them by putting on a really shallow persona?

>>125009
>a lot of decent polite men have absorbed the "asking a woman out = sexual harassment" thing.
I know, trust me. There's a cute one in my life who's tall and kinda shy and likes music and art and actually has a mind and is just you know hot, but I just feel he's never going to ask me out for that reason. It's sad
>YOU be the one to approach and ask them out.
I know… I know… but…
>Obviously don't be a creep.
And there it is… you ask too much of me…

>>125000
So there's a creepy incel going around hitting on women but he skips over YOU? lol how fat are you, be honest now.

>>125012
>Ouch you got me, maybe more of my personality came through in my post than I thought?
Many of us are guilty of this, I know I sure was.

>without going too too deep into my story, I got rejected by friend groups a few times when I was smol and that hurt a lot, and after that I spent a long time living in my own head and made up friends in there who love me the way I'd like to be loved
Yeah, that would mess with you. In my case I used to be unable to comprehend most normal human interactions because my home kinda lacked any, so I avoided normal people and either interacted only with internet schizos or engaged in escapism. I never learned what it's like to be accepted by anyone other than the insane people who are open-minded towards anything abnormal, and that's why I'm on imageboards.
That created a lot of suffering because much of life seemed to exist in a completely different plane from me. If you don't feel like you're missing out on much I wouldn't worry nona, but I don't want you to fall behind like I did.

>>125000
Why in the hell would you bother ? As someone who went 4b I think you're criminally insane

Imagine life without men, with just creativity and gardening. Why people bother outside of these things shocks me. You have the freedom to do whatever you want and you use that time thinking about men? Yeah I've seen the dating scene in 2025 for youngins it's the dreariest shit since WWII.

So why?? Are you retarded grilfren ?

Life without men is a carnival, i know from experience. Just how much are you doing this for peer approval ?

>>125002
As someone on the normal social spectrum you're deluded. You're intentionally lying to her and manipulating her. Men and dating don't improve just because you can socialize, in fact it gets worse. A lot of "normie" women are just heavily brainwashed to put up with male tripe.

They go out, they appear normal, and then they come home live as bangmaid, enabler, rape victim