/feels/ - Advice & Venting

i really like my bf, but i can't help myself wishing i was with a girl. he''s amazing, does everything well, we get along super well, have similar hobbies, enjoy each other 's company, he's polite and fun to be around, even my parents like him. The dates are cute and fun, but i feel like im not really feeling much, kind of hollow. on the otherside I love my bestie, she is amazing, caring, loving, even drove in a snowstorm to save my ass once. we made each other bracelets, cook for each other, talk all day, she gave me a beautiful birthday card and took me to a concert, and we even say goodnight messages to each other everynight. I feel guilty about this because i feel like i'm getting something out of our platonic friendship that i cannot get from my boyfriend, and i keep apologizing to him because i feel like its not right. I told him before that i do love girls and he's my first real boyfriend that i want to try stuff out with.
>lmao just dump him and run away with Bestie
I can't do that since she is in a really sweet relationship herself. her BF and Her both had awful awful relationships in the past and they are sooooooo sweet for each other, i do not want to wedge myself in between them, despite bestie asking her bf if he'd be cool with kissing girls and he is. Bestie also told me she just wants to be besties and not do anything romantic, despite us both kinda crushing on each other since we met and we had to stop ourselves couple times before we did something. idk if im making any sense but i just know i want to have a relationship with a girl, but also still have a close companionship with my bf. Maybe the perfect scenario would be me being mainly with my bf, and occasionally go on dates with girls, but idk im just rambling eughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh help me nonas ;_;