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disowning my entire family because they are extreme trads. advice? Anonymous 133684
My family, including extended family, is extremely trad. Beliefs vary a little bit but for the most part women shouldn't go to college or vote, premarital sex is evil, dating around is evil, and not having kids makes you a whore. They're like christian jihadists essentially.
"Women's rights" wise my parents were actually better than my extended family because they wanted me to be educated and to work, they just wouldn't pay for any college. (They paid for my brother, lol). But my parents fucked it up for themselves because they beat me really bad and started calling me a whore the moment I got my period. Real Carrie shit. I still have an eating disorder because I was mostly fed their leftovers and just never developed an appetite. Just real bizarre shit. My point is, I have no familial ties to any of these people. Like they're just nothing to me.
My main obstacle is getting a job that pays enough. I'm on medicaid and am getting psychiatric help but it might be a long road to normalcy. I had a full time job once and had a nervous break that stopped me from sleeping for five days. I'm really scared to go back to work after that but I've tried a few part time jobs and gig work since then and I found a few things that I could cope with I think.
My main fear is that they come looking for me and start a lot of drama. Does anyone else have experience with this? Are they allowed to just stalk you in the USA if you're related to them?
Anonymous 133686
>>133684thats fucked up nona. completely understandable you want to cut ties with them. are you still living with them?
>My main fear is that they come looking for me and start a lot of dramahonestly I don't know how much they will really care judging by how badly they treated you. I'd hope they wont go after you. But have you noticed them trying to be controlling/possesive over you before?
gl nona
Anonymous 133687
>>133686I live with my grandma now and she's not violent or anything so can mostly be ignored. She went to college herself so is cool with me going and as long as she doesn't find out about my personal life I'm good. Its when family gatherings happen that shit goes south and people fight, or my parents brag about how bruised I'd get when they hit me. Thats when I get really fucked up for days.
I only see my parents on holidays now thank god. Even then I spend most of my time outside in the backyard or something.
Sorry I'm kinda venting again but idk I'm hopeful. I have more agency now than I ever have.
The problem is they believe they love me. They don't but they think they do. If I set an actual boundary about not wanting to see them anymore they'd probably get sad and try to guilt trip me or show up at my future apartment.
Anonymous 133690
>>133684 What you're talking about is protective order when its against family, and the details vary by state, but you have to provide proof of the abuse. Did you document any of it on your phone ? Do you have paperwork from therapists or school counselers who can vouch that they knew you were being abused? They can be locked up if they walk through a protective order
Anonymous 133691
>>133690I spent my whole childhood trying to get that but never could get any adults on my side. My mom was wealthy and in a political position, I think she just had an insane ability to get people on her side.
I think my best bet is just moving really, really far. but she was recently fired for misusing company money so maybe I can use that somehow?
Anonymous 133693
>>133691You're mom is extremely wealthy, in politics, part of a company but she thinks women shouldn't vote???
Anonymous 133694
>>133691Unless they use financial leverage i dont see how they can make you do anything after the age of 18. You dont have to let them in your home, you can block them on your phone/ social media, and anyone who associates with them.
Anonymous 133696
>>133693literally yeah. I don't get it either. it's not direct politics, but influences politics. many of the plastic surgery addicted maga ladies are the same way.
>>133694i guess i can just call the police if my parents show up. but ehhh. a stranger broke in to my friends house and we had to fight him because the cops just thought we were all crackheads. i don't trust anyone.
Anonymous 133697
This picture made me realize all those girls I knew who would only eat chicken nuggets probably just yearn for their carefree childhood days when they didn't have any worries. A little sad to think about but I hope you're doing okay these days wherever you are nugget girls.
Anonymous 133699
>>133691Just move far away, don’t formally disown them or preemptively get a restraining order or anything like that you can’t easily walk back later, if money is such an issue then find a guy who treats you better than your family, shouldn’t be too hard
Anonymous 133701
>>133699If I decide its worth marrying some chud I don't like just to divorce him this is exactly what I'll do lmfao. problem is I have to fuck him.
Anonymous 133702
>>133701yes mrs. princess, you have to fuck the provider, that won't be enough though, you'll have to give him a kid, take care of house and so on, otherwise good luck getting someone rich to settle with it, your rich family is exception, get back to reality
Anonymous 133707
>>133702You literally don't need to give anyone a kid because birth control exists. You can just lie. You also don't need to marry rich in order to escape abuse and absolutely no one is saying that he has to be fuckin jeff bezos. Do you know the point of marriage is to split rent with someone who can't legally abandon you? That's it. I need a guy who can at least cover a one bedroom apartment and can work on my escape plan from there.
Women marry and divorce to escape their shitty lives literally all the time dude. Radfems like to pretend getting hogtied and beat by a family member is more empowering than trying your luck at finding a nonviolent man who can provide housing and food. I'm a radfem myself but it's just so exhausting how out of touch they are with actual everyday women.
>good luck getting someone to settle with itHave you literally never met someone in a lavender marriage? GO OUTSIDE.
Anonymous 133708
If you think you can escape by marrying someone and having a child to keep hostage I predict you will definitely end up in another abusive situation
Anonymous 133709
>>133708Can you motherfuckers not read? Is birth control illegal where you live?
Anonymous 133712
>>133696I have never had the cops fail me. But I dont think you can get shy or intimidated by them. If you treat them friendly and are polite they will be very helpful. Eh I did have a disgusting one arrest me one time but i had a warrant and it was deserved lol i didn't pay a traffic fine
Anonymous 133713
>>133697but chicken nuggets suck after a while. god they are really horrible food.
go make some shrimp alfredo from scratch or grill some salmon &potatoes on the grill
Anonymous 133714
>>133696do you ever call her mar-a-lago face to her face? what do you think she would do?
Anonymous 133715
>>133714you should do it btw. from far away. while holding a potato canon menacingly.
Anonymous 133716
>>133713Why yes I would like a plate of your shrimp alfredo I'm so glad you offered.
Anonymous 133740
>>133711You think I'm a parasite because I use men for housing and food? Do you wanna know what I think you are…? I bet you knowwww hehehe
>>133714I don't think she knows what that is but she deffo got mutilated a little bit when she had skin removal surgery. She's physically uncomfortable to look at.
Anonymous 133758
>>133701Why are you already planning to divorce in your hypothetical marriage? Before you do anything you should stop being your own worst enemy, plan for failure and you can expect failure
Anonymous 133762
>>133758The plan is to get a marriage of comfort for as long as I need until I'm on my feet and I can adjust to adult life. That way I don't have to worry about being homeless or having bad health insurance or whatever. The most ideal would be to get a lavender marriage where my spouse knows my plan and is ok with it all. They'd be getting a good cook so eh it might actually be possible.
I'm only planning for failure in the eyes of people who think marriage is about love and not a financial contract. And I mean it could be about love I guess but come on.
Anonymous 133763
>>133701>have to fuck himyou dont actually. just say you have sexual trauma and want to work on it, then never do it. maybe go to therapy to cover.
Anonymous 133764
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>>133762You sound like you might as well just get a roommate
Anonymous 133783
Save money and fly the countro, I know it sounds very hard and I might not be being empathetic about your situation enough. Yet what you describe? oh my god nona that sounds so awful.
I'm really sorry for what your family did to you, it sounds like so nuts omg wtfff they are all nuts
I think if you can fly and leave that country do it. Do not miss that opportunity. Fly and leave the couuntry and never look back.
Anonymous 133894
>>133783Lol the closest I've gotten to a lavender marriage was actually a foreign girl who wanted a greencard. I think in her country I would automatically be considered a resident after that so I could do that. Hmm I need to text her.
Anonymous 133902
>>133762From a financial standpoint your deal sounds laughable to a guy, you’d be the most overpriced cook in the world, if you want a free meal ticket then you might want to consider a boyfriend before a husband, no one’s going to be a knowing legally bound bag holder
Anonymous 133915
>>133902you people are legitimately so sheltered I'm at a complete loss for words. what do you think marriage was for one billion years?
Anonymous 133916
>>133915 I think the only person that's sheltered around here is you.
Marriage expected a lot more in the past. House work was a lot more taxing. Child rearing was a lot more taxing and it was expected that you'd have children.
This honestly feels like bait because you surely can't be this naive. Either that or this is moid-posting attempting to make people feel bad because it's "so easy."
Anonymous 133919
>>133916I think I'm the not-sheltered one because I understand working a 9-5 is worse than cleaning a house. I'm not fucking going back to a factory.
Anonymous 133920
>>133919I think housework is worse. I haven't had a job for 4 years and it makes me bored and frustrated at home. It's better to work. There are activities that clearly make money.
Anonymous 133921
>>133920Luckily this entire thread was about how I'm going to work part-time while in a lavender marriage (potentially to a woman or gay man) so that I can be housed but not overworked in some fuckass bluecollar shithole that I'd rather kill myself than go back to.
READIIING RAINBOWWWW
Anonymous 133923
ITT op defending her fantasy which she confuses for a plan in front of strangers for some reason
