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/mhg/ - mental health general Anonymous 9712

hi anons, hope you're all doing well. i didn't see anything like this and wanted to hear from people in similar situations as i am.

>are you in treatment or recovery right now?

>what has worked well for you in terms of overcoming symptoms?
>thoughts on medication vs. therapy, different types of talk therapies or alternative approaches to medication?
>do you have any treatment horror stories/cringe therapist horror stories?
>how much does your mental illness impact how you function day to day?
>do you tend to tell others about your mental illness or keep it to yourself?
>if you don't consider yourself recovered now, what obstacles are keeping you from recovery/low impact from symptoms?

Anonymous 9735

0ba18496abb5e04b96…

>are you in treatment or recovery right now?
I would say I'm in treatment right now. I was officially diagnosed with my mental illnesses, but in a way that had me going to my psychiatrist regularly in January of this year and I've been trying my best to help myself as much as possible. I may end up going to an outpatient treatment center if I still need it by next year.

>what has worked well for you in terms of overcoming symptoms?

Well, what's difficult is I've always tried to hide my symptoms and to hold things in instead of lashing out (my main, defining mental disorder is BPD). However, I've still had plenty of relationship turmoil because of my cognitive distortions. The best things I've found so far is my medication and it's embarrassing, but it's this app called Intellect and it keeps me practicing certain skills over and over again so they're fresh in my memory. I keep detailed logs in that app of all the little things that bother me and that in of itself is helpful as well. I'm going to start therapy again, so I'll see how that goes. It definitely takes time. I also reread Marsha Lineham DBT sheets and print them out to remind me of said skills. It's hard because there's so much fucking information in there, but if I keep it to the stuff that is most applicable to me and I just keep on reading it, the repetition eventually sticks into your head.

I guess the last thing that's helped me is not denying my feelings as unimportant or "wrong". Accepting them is far better.

I still have a ways to go, but this has all helped me in terms of my relationship (BPD doesn't affect my other familial relationships or really, any of my other relationships). What I really wish I could help myself with is the chronic, deep feelings of emptiness and lack of identity I possess. I've had anhedonia for so many years that anything I do doesn't give me enjoyment.

>thoughts on medication vs. therapy, different types of talk therapies or alternative approaches to medication?

Depakote has helped me tremendously in that I used to have breakdowns where I'd weep, scream, and bawl like a mother losing her child and now I don't (at most, I sob loudly, and I don't have breakdowns that often). However, I also believe it's made me gain 5-10 lbs (I haven't changed my eating habits). I have starved myself to get down in weight because it disgusts me so.

Antidepressants have also helped me in terms of me not feelings as paranoid, and when they build up sufficiently, they help my MDD a good deal.

I'm also on Risperidone which helps with the breakdowns as well.

Therapy, eh. It hasn't helped me as much as the app I mentioned. I'm thinking of doing therapy again, though, because I went into a downward spiral when I quit. So perhaps it is doing something for me. I want to be more directed with my therapist about my goals next time.

>do you have any treatment horror stories/cringe therapist horror stories?

No, not really.

>how much does your mental illness impact how you function day to day?

It has the capacity to impair me a lot. It affects me almost every day. I generally cry (silently, but tears dripping down my face, fortunately, masks have helped me not be so self-conscious about that) at work every day because I get in a thought spiral from my OCD. I am paranoid as fuck with my boyfriend and I'm always restraining myself from venting about how I feel, I'm always having to hold back in order to sort whether things are really worth talking to him about. Even when I have "good days", that's because I'm trying fucking hard against what my thoughts are telling me. I haven't cut for over 6 months now, but the urges are still so strong and it feels like I'm peeling myself away from myself in order not to do that. There's so much of myself I have to alter in order to not be perceived as manipulative, and it's somewhat ironic, but I hate to think I'm causing others pain because of my behavior (and even then, I don't always succeed).

>do you tend to tell others about your mental illness or keep it to yourself?

When I was officially diagnosed, I kept it to myself for months. I hate the stigma. Eventually I talked to my boyfriend and my mom and sister about it. I've told one close friend as well. I was terrified to tell my boyfriend because online, people talk about BPD in such a static way and there's a lot of BPD behavior I do have, but there's also plenty of BPD behavior I don't engage in (like suicide or self harm baiting, for instance), so it's like, I was scared of him seeing all that and thinking less of me, especially since guides for people dealing with those with BPD talk about people with BPD like they are children. Eventually I told him though, as I thought he should know. I told my mom because we have a family member on my dad's side who most likely has BPD herself. My sister, well, I tell her everything. As for my friend, I only told her because she has Bipolar Type I so I knew she wouldn't judge me hardcore for it.

>if you don't consider yourself recovered now, what obstacles are keeping you from recovery/low impact from symptoms?

I can't comment. I want to be in recovery soon, by the end of next year at least.

Anonymous 9743

>>9712
I'm seeing a psychiatrist for the first time soon. I'm nervous but excited. Mostly nervous that she'll dismiss me or urge me into therapy instead of medication. I've tried counseling and it didn't help at all. But I'm slso hopeful that I can get a real diagnosis and some professional help. I think I have bpd, but even if I'm wrong I'll be happy with anything that can help me.

Anonymous 9802

>>9712

>are you in treatment or recovery right now?

I was in therapy from Nov 2018 to April 2019 and again from Nov 2019 to around June 2020. It helped a significant amount. The first time I stopped because I had to, the second time because I was feeling better. I'll start going again if I feel like I need it again.

>what has worked well for you in terms of overcoming symptoms?

I have pretty specific anxiety problem and I get very bad panic attacks. Making an emergency kit for my panic attacks has been one thing that helped a lot, the most helpful thing was probably the Jolly Ranchers. Sucking on candy during a panic attack is very calming because it forces your breathing to regulate a little more. Also working through a good anxiety workbook, journaling and therapy.

>thoughts on medication vs. therapy, different types of talk therapies or alternative approaches to medication?

I prefer therapy. My mom is a doc and has been trying to get me to take meds for a while now. Usually she has really good advice and she's always right, but for some reason this just doesn't sit right with me and it never has, even when I was depressed as a kid/young adult. I even got some around spring and just never took them because I was too nervous. I think it might be necessary in some cases though and if I get as bad as I did last winter when I almost offed myself I will probably take them.

>do you have any treatment horror stories/cringe therapist horror stories?

I once went to couples a therapist who told my partner that he should in no way help me when I have a panic attack and should basically just sit there and let me deal with it myself. While I understand the importance of not needing to rely on him to help me through my mental illness and anxiety, I don't think I'd be able to sit idly by if he was freaking the fuck out, panicking and couldn't breathe (which is literally what happens to me). He was legit there to learn what he could do to help in those situations. It was honestly really embarrassing for me since I felt like this woman thought I wanted him to "fix" me….but fuck her.

>how much does your mental illness impact how you function day to day?

A side effect of developing this panic/anxiety disorder around 2 years ago is the social anxiety that has followed. That's probably the most disruptive to my life. Even with my best and closest friends in the world, I'm a wreck when I have to see people. I've lost so much confidence and I have no idea who I am anymore, and I feel that every day. Meeting new people has got to be the most agonizing thing in the world, when I honestly used to really enjoy it and converse with new people easily. Other than that, it's been really detrimental to my feeling of confidence and self-worth, which is also something I feel every day. I used to feel like I was pretty smart, and had a bright future and my confidence in all those things have taken a huge hit.

>do you tend to tell others about your mental illness or keep it to yourself?

My closest friends, family, and partner know. I don't talk much about it unless asked and generally I like to keep it private. But I've also realized how much talking about it has helped me feel less alone, so I have been making an active effort to talk about it more, which is probably why my friends know at all.

>if you don't consider yourself recovered now, what obstacles are keeping you from recovery/low impact from symptoms?

Not enough time to focus on it and what I've learned. I get busy and carried away with day to day responsibilities and "forget" to take care of myself. I need a lot of alone time for self-reflection and it can be easy to forget about it or disregard how important it is in favor of spending that time doing something else I need to do.

Anonymous 9852

>>9743
I’m kind of freaking out because I had my appointment… it seemed to go well… the psychiatrist said it sounded like I’m bipolar. When she asked about medication I’m taking I specifically said I don’t take any me, not even birth control. She prescribed me valproic acid and told me the only side effects were nausea and drowsiness. I decided to look up the medicine on my lunch break and wtf it’s all articles talking about how women should be on birth control while taking it and lots of articles questioning if it should even be prescribed to child bearing women. Both the prescription from the office and the pharmacy say nothing about not taking the medication when there’s a possibility of becoming pregnant. I feel betrayed. I mentioned a lot of times that I live with my boyfriend and mentioned sleeping together. But I’m just going to do the responsible thing and call tomorrow to ask if there’s another medication I can try.

Anonymous 9879

>are you in treatment or recovery right now?
I take medication for OCD and depression but I am not in therapy. When I was younger I took Luvox but it completely annihilated my appetite. Once I was older I switched to Zoloft which was better in terms wanting to eat (it's still repressed though). I am so grateful that those SSRIs don't cause me to gain weight. They do wonders for my depression, the OCD not so much.

>what has worked well for you in terms of overcoming symptoms?

I have dermatillomania so it is helpful when people around me remind me not to pick, I tend to do it mindlessly. There have also been some studies on excoriation disorder that suggest that treating it like substance abuse is more effective than treating it like OCD, I would like to try that method to see if I have more success.

>thoughts on medication vs. therapy, different types of talk therapies or alternative approaches to medication?

I prefer one-on-one therapy, it allows me to open up more. Medication has been a lifesaver for me, but there are many people who struggle on it. Everyone, and their plan for treatment, should be individualized.

>do you have any treatment horror stories/cringe therapist horror stories?

I suppose I was the cringe one in this case. I was in a new therapy group for the first time which was targeted towards patients with obsessive-compulsive disorder. There was another lady who also had a skin-picking disorder, and she admitted to picking the scabs off her cat. I got quite angry about this, and the therapist ended up kicking me out. "This is a support group, not a judging group." This situation is why I avoid group therapy now.

>how much does your mental illness impact how you function day to day?

When I was younger I used to be extremely embarrassed about it, I never wore shorts or t-shirts. It really impacted my self-esteem as a teenager. My OCD was way more severe then as well, I lived in a house infested with bugs and itching was a major trigger of mine. Now that I am able to a) cope better thanks to therapy, and b) have more control over my environment I am doing much better. The scars have faded for the most part and I can wear all the clothes I like to wear now.

>do you tend to tell others about your mental illness or keep it to yourself?

It's hard to hide the scars I have, so no. I can only tell people "I tripped and fell" so many times before they begin to get suspicious.

>if you don't consider yourself recovered now, what obstacles are keeping you from recovery/low impact from symptoms?

I don't consider myself recovered, and I don't know if I ever will. I cannot control bug bites or things that make me itch, so right now I am working on not initiating the scratching in the first place. Once I go at it and it becomes a larger, peelable scab it becomes a problem. However I can acknowledge it and I am working on fixing it, which is the most important part.



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