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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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c44be9e3-83e3-4bb6…

Vent thread Anonymous 45059

We hit bump on >>43518 so here we go again, talk about your problems and vent your frustrations

Anonymous 45062

>>45037
anon why are you trying to stay moid free?

Anonymous 45071

tumblr_60aff670f1a…

I'm afraid of my little sister trooning out. She's 13 and has pronouns in her ig bio (she/her for now but I've seen that shit escalate to they/them more times than I can count) and her ig profile picture is one of those pride flag picrew image-maker thingies with an asexual pride flag and an aromantic pride flag. It may sound like I'm making a big deal out of nothing, I mean I thought I was asexual when I was 13 myself but the difference is the whole 'it's hip to be a tranny' thing didn't exist back then like it does now. She also tries to appear as androgynous as possible by dressing a certain way and spews 'progressive' talking points like "if a man says he's a woman, then he is a woman" that type of shit. Now, we come from a pretty conservative family and live in a 3rd world shithole where it's pretty hard to be a woman and not hate yourself. However I don't want her to become a tranny just because of the shitty environment we live in. I want to say something to her but we're not really that close and don't have much in common (aside from watching anime together from time to time) I want to help her but I don't want to seem like a busy body either. What do?

Anonymous 45072

god there's this girl in my course who won't shut up about being asexual in my course and keeps bringing up her ldr bf and how he's the only person she's ever liked. which would be fine but she has to go invite him to our course-exclusive groupchats and have him involved in near every game we play together, it's really obnoxious and cringe

Anonymous 45083

>>45071
talk to her about badass women and biology

Anonymous 45090

pe19610528.gif

I suppose I'm not allowed to browse Newgrounds anymore either.

Anonymous 45092

aggLAIN.gif

I've been out of a job for a few months and the job market is terrible.

I only have 1 year of experience, but a good degree at a prestigious school, and there are absolutely no junior openings. It's all internships or jobs requiring at least 3 years of experience.

I'm still glad I left my old job to get away from the covid petri dish of a city I used to live in, but I didn't expect I would have this much trouble even finding a job I'd want to apply to.
This has made me feel so worthless and useless. At the current pace I might just take it easy for a few years and then commit sudoku when the shame becomes too overwhelming.

Anonymous 45093

>>45092
take an internship and there is a good chance it will turn into a job. at the very least, it's easier to get a job while you are working somewhere else. employers tend to be overly suspicious of unemployed people.

btw, three years of experience is not always needed even if they say it is. the job advert is their dream candidate. since you have a good degree, you might be able to substitute this for some experience. just spam all the job openings until something sticks.

Anonymous 45094

Boyfriend just sucks at tact. Literally wept all weekend because I wouldn't see him for two weeks and he just informed me of how he's doing art for a female friend of his (they've been friends a long time) who used to want to date him and is now single. Fuck you, I'm good. I just thought maybe I'd have a chance of getting over how weepy I've been, but I guess not. It's a mistake to say anything to him.

Anonymous 45095

>>45094
dump him

Anonymous 45097

>>45093
Yeah, that doesn't work in my country, you pretty much need to be in education to get an internship.

Anonymous 45098

>>45095
He doesn't mean to hurt me. This friend just broke up with her boyfriend because her boyfriend was teetering on being physically abusive. He did not want to date her when she wanted him years and years ago. He has created art for her before. It just rubs me the wrong way when I've voiced how lonely and alone I've been and then it's like he does that for someone else when he knows I've been missing him and would like more communication.

It's selfish, but don't want to hear about his friend. I'm sure they're in much more contact since her boyfriend left her, though.

Anonymous 45099

>>45098
doesn't matter if he does it on purpose or not. he's hurting you. don't be with someone who hurts you.

Anonymous 45100

>>45098
>Moids with female friends you dont know
Ewww.

>inb4 somebody says I'm being too one sided

>Foids with a lot of male friends you dont know about
Ewww.

It's the same case both ways. Tell him that, tell him how would he feel if you were surrounded by male friends he doesn't know about… It would be bad right? Obviously yes. It would raise suspicion. No matter who you are.

Anonymous 45103

>>45100
In all fairness, he wants me to meet her. She lives far away.

I don't keep any male friends because I don't like moids. I actually have no friends at all.

Anonymous 45107

>>45062
They do nothing but distract from meaningful objectives and sow chaos in our lives.

Anonymous 45118

The idea of dating scares me, because I feel like the person would only be with me because they had to settle for somebody (me), so they would only tolerate me and constantly think about someone else, or eventually cheat if possible.

Anonymous 45137

Trying to find a job mid pandemic is the bleakest shit I’ve ever done and I’m so fucking scared of being unable to pay my rent and bills. Sucks to be me. Would literally pick up dog shit all day for money rn.

Anonymous 45138

1601683050329.gif

>>45137
I feel you.

Anonymous 45145

I started renting with a guy who owns his own home just before the pandemic hit. When government funding couldn't pay for everything, I came to him in desperation and he was 100% fine with just waiving utilities. Then my savings ran out and he just flat out ignored rent in favour of me taking over some domestic duties. Now I feel like I'm a 40's housewife, completely dependent on him. I'm terrified what will happen when the pandemic is over and I still don't have a job.

Anonymous 45146

>>45107
This will be me if I don't survive the current relationship I'm in

Anonymous 45149


Anonymous 45157

tumblr_o9j35xlYE81…

i have forum rp as a hobby…and i get sort of insecure (?) of other people who are able to reply to posts super fast. especially when their writing is extremely quality?

i feel like i'm not the most enjoyable person to thread with (or even speak to, really) so yeah.

Anonymous 45164

I just want to hurt them. Really really bad.

Anonymous 45167

My life is just a giant cope. I have given up on ever being truly happy and now I try to at least make someone else happy. I don't really love him, I'm only with him for validation and to not be alone.

Anonymous 45169

I did have a Gravity Falls monster from season 1 planned out in a few days, one from an episode of Season 1 which premiered in 2012. Should I do it? Just asking. (No answer by tomorrow will mean no by default.)

Anonymous 45171

>>45169
A gnome?
You have to be a bit more specific.

Anonymous 45173

My ass is always hurting i do the cool downs except my ass is sore and hurts either way.
I want a job already I know I should have stayed except that city would have reminded me of him and the lies and promises he broke.
I wish I could restart over everything again.
Different choices.
I don't regret what happened, I wish I had listened to my friend though, he and she were right all along.
Man I miss that city despite the horrible traffic, pollution, quarantine, gangs, homeless/hobos, having to wait to use the bathroom, horrible customers, gossiping people and coworkers, relatives. I miss it, most of all I miss the thought at least I could have started cycling to certain areas I would have loved to see.
I still could but not that city, maybe another city or state.

Anonymous 45174

you know i was talking to this girl and i realized that i interrupted her and said haha sorry the adhd jumped out you know and apologized but im now starting to worry adhd might be making me talk too fast and drive myself in circles and i hope i get over this because meds just make the thoughts sound too formal to the point i probably sound weird and robotic and my average self is adhd happy go lucky but idk if some people are ready for that because i am so fast?

Anonymous 45175

>>45171
I want to keep it a surprise, though it IS a rather huge oneAnd let's just say I already drew his cousin on the 5th of this month..

Anonymous 45176

3t3z8vokoen51.jpg

I posted this in an older vent thread but got no helpful replies so am asking again.

I am a HS senior and I have been strongly considering taking a year off before uni, mostly so I can work on my mental health issues that caused me to be a friendless loner in HS, but I am also really scared I will just waste a year doing nothing, even worse, a year with barely any social contact (just in the workplace) could rot my brain even more and I will be truly too far gone once I enter uni.
How do you even find friends as an adult, assuming your co-workers will most likely not be withing your age range? Should I bite the bullet and go to uni or take the year off? I feel like no matter what I choose it will be the wrong choice :/

Anonymous 45177

>>45176

I wouldn’t take a year off unless you have a real solid plan for how you’re going to spend the time because a lot of people who do that and don’t have a plan just end up never going to college. Have you considered studying abroad if you have the money? For some programs you’ll be in close proximity to the same group of people for the whole semester so it can be a good way to make friends and practice social skills.

Anonymous 45178

tumblr_1010f2f00b8…

Life is fucked in many ways, but above all, I fear being a failure to my parents. If only I could go back and redo everything knowing what I know now. I swear I would be a better kid.

Anonymous 45179

>>45176
>>45177
If you don't have money and still want to travel, you can look into any kind of English teaching program. Then you would be able to take a year off school, earn some money, and experience a new country. I know ESL abroad teachers are negatively stereotyped because of neckbeards and creepers that apply to those programs but still something to consider.

Anonymous 45180

>>45171
Ok fine, it's the Multibear.

Anonymous 45181

8e25b4fc-52be-4e91…

>>45176
As someone who was in your exact position as a friendless neet, uni really really helped me even with the covid restrictions. Living alone and finding ways to socialise every day has really made me so much less depressed.

Anonymous 45182

>>45173
Stop shoving stuff up your butt anon

Anonymous 45183

>>45179
Really don't recommend teaching abroad if the anon has mental health issues. These types of jobs have a high turn over rate and so treat their employees really badly. Even if a job sounds ok, they lie to get you there.

Anonymous 45192

>>45179
English teaching programs in developed countries want college graduates. Not sure about developing countries, they may be mors lenient.

Anonymous 45196

EimFMwyUwAA0iSg_wa…

being fed compliments that are probably false hurts bros. don't know if i'm too suspicious of people or what.
if it is just me being needlessly sus and anxious (as usual) i do think it's a good thing i, on some level, realize that i'm being silly (?). sigh

Anonymous 45197

>>45173
Check ur ass for varicose veins

Anonymous 45203

Im worried I'm a covert narcissist. I want to distance myself from ppl im close to so I dont hurt them. I feel like a monster. Is this the right decision?

Anonymous 45205

>>45093
Agreed on the years of experience. Most cases it's just a number that HR pulls out their ass.
Friendly reminder a company once asked for an employee with 10 years NodeJS experience when at the time NodeJS had only existed for 7.

Anonymous 45215

ptsd-after-car-acc…

i fucking hate fake rescue animals videos. there're many youtubers in my country who do that kind of videos and they always choose the young animals, fucking disgusting. sometimes they just straight up catch animals in the jungle. you can see the fear in those animals' eyes. the cops in my country don't do anything about it, youtube don't do anything about it. all i can do is reporting those vids and cry.

Anonymous 45216

girls… i did it. i booked my rhinoplasty. next month. today. i wanted this since i was 12. i saved up for a year now to get the best surgeon i could. it feels like a triumph, because i know i worked hard for this.

Anonymous 45224

comunicacionyhuman…

I can't believe I was unaware for 2 weeks.
RIP. :(

Anonymous 45228

>>45216
Would you post your current nose?

Anonymous 45229

>>45215
Same anon. There is no limits to human greed and cruelty. Those poor, innocent animals who did nothing but trust them and love them. It fills my heart up with so much grief. I'm hugging my cat and stroking him lovingly right now. I will always keep him warm and safe.

Anonymous 45236

>>45216
I don't want to scare you but look up prettypastelplease and how her nosejob got messed up by not being able to see her surgeon for follow up appointments during lockdown. Maybe now is not the best time for this.

Anonymous 45237

>>45092
You should still apply to jobs if the only thing you're missing is work experience, it's wishful thinking at best by employers, trust me. Even if it was a waste of time, what's the worst case, you still don't have a job? You don't have one right now.

Anonymous 45238

>>45176
There are many reasons to take a year off from college, being friendless is not one of them. If you're the type that's actually mentally equipped to go to college in the first place, it is a far better place for making friends and socializing than High School. If you have any other reasons to take a year off, do it, but social problems got exponentially worse in that case.

Anonymous 45239

>>45229
Your words made me so happy, I can't be with my cat right now and I really miss them so much

Anonymous 45247

I would like to have a female friend to talk about how sad I feel about my body and how my bf feels about it. Basically I've been trying to lose weight for a few months now (and I've lost 20 pounds so far) but he's pushing me to do it faster and from time to time he just throws jokes about my body and sometimes say hurtful stuff like he's ashamed of being seen with me. I really love him but I feel delusional because even though he says stuff like that I actively ignore how he feels about my body. We also started to live together a few weeks ago and I feel watched all the time, specially when I take something to eat.
Can someone just throw her discord and hear me? I promise to be a good hearer too.
I don't want to talk to my few friends about this because I don't want them to think bad of him…

Anonymous 45248

>>45247
dump him

Anonymous 45249

>>45092
just apply for the 3 years experience. If the uni is good enough, they'll let it slide.

Hell, I went to a state uni that is quite average and I still got one of those 5 years exp. minimum jobs without any internship or whatever.

Anonymous 45254

Ive posted before about my problems making friends at uni, but I havent been on here and updated in a few months

Im now in my final year and I have finally made an actual real friend. we hang out outside of class and everything!

for those of you in a similar situation without friends: my greatest fear was that people I was talking to secretly didnt like me, or if I wasnt perfect every time we interacted theyd change their mind and start hating me. but I can tell you now, this is 100% not true. you dont need to be perfect. you dont need to agonise whether your new friend is going to leave you because you said a cringe joke or something stupid. people are very forgiving and are genuinely happy to be your friend even if youre not perfect

Anonymous 45255

>>45247
>I don't want them to think bad of him…
Well too bad. He's being an asshole and you can't hide it.

Anonymous 45256

>>45247
You sound like he could hit you and you'd make up excuses for him. How does a girl get to this point?

Anonymous 45260

>>45249
>Hell, I went to a state uni that is quite average and I still got one of those 5 years exp. minimum jobs without any internship or whatever.

Gigastacy energy right there. Did you have any experience ?

Anonymous 45261

>>45247
please move back in with your parents or whatever and break up with him

Anonymous 45273

5efd8c23923767.563…

>>45177
>>45179
Not sure why you are bringing studying abroad, I guess I would not be against it but it is not something I have been strongly considering. I do not really wanna take a year off to travel the world (even though that is a part of it), I mostly wanna get together mentally.

>>45238
>>45181
I mean, I am not really that "depressed", I just have severe CPTSD and OCD which make actually maintaining friendships a nightmare. Ideally I would wanna take a year off to sort of get some professional help for them cause I wasn't allowed before and enter uni a less broken person, but yeah as I said before, a year of loneliness could fuck me up even more.

Anonymous 45277

>>45197
I have digestive issues.
Thanks anyway

Anonymous 45279

God, I just wanna be single and hoe again. So many cute/hot boys I wanna flirt and play with. I have such a good man now though and don't want to break up with him. I know I'd regret it later. The grass is not greener.

Anonymous 45280

>>45273
Get a job and get EMDR and just focus on recovering for a year. You can take a trip at the end with all the money you make.

Anonymous 45281

>>45273

The only reason I brought up studying abroad was cause I had my suicide planned and someone suggested I study abroad. The whole experience changed my life, I started going to therapy, and now I've turned things around. Can't say you'll have the same experience, but it sure helped me.

Anonymous 45283

>>45059
I was dating a guy for 5.5 years and then he confessed that he had cheated on me over a year ago (he fucked 1 woman multiple times). I broke up with him, but I'm having an insainely hard time not getting back together. He was super sweet and supportive.

We were ldr for ~3yrs leading up to the cuckening, then he moved in with me almost immediately after (ass). The past year has been pretty great. idk. I want to date him again but idk if I can/should accept this. I hate him for ruining everything.

Anonymous 45284

>>45283
he cheated on you. he's not actually sweet or supportive. he just puts on a good act of it.

he cheated on you, lived with that in his head while he text or even saw you. then he did it again. and again.

he does not care about you. you do not fulfill him.

he increased your risk of contracting a disease, sexually transmitted or otherwise. he doesn't care about your well being.

Anonymous 45286

>>45284
I want to defend or explain, but I know you're right. He just essentially explained that he realized it was wrong and living with me for the past year he realized how much he loved me and wanted things to be right between us so he told me. I wouldn't have found out. He didn't do it all this last year. he could have. he's supportive and sweet, what's the line between acting and reality? I hate this.

Anonymous 45287

>>45286
why put your energy into being with him when you can focus on finding someone new.

he didn't tell you this to improve your life. he did it for himself to get you to forgive him so he could stop feeling guilty. if he really cared about you he would not have told you and lived with the consequences of his own actions. there is literally no benefit to your relationship for you in him telling you this of it was truly over and in the past.

the other possibility is he's trying to get you to break up with him.

>he realized it was wrong and living with me for the past year he realized how much he loved me

he was with you 3 years and moved in together and only then he realised he loved you? that's not a good thing.

Anonymous 45288

>>45287
Yeah. He was going through a hard time with his job and some depression shit. And casual low-key alcoholism. But he never really appreciated me before this past year I don't think. but I feel like he does now. That's why it's hard. maybe I need to just start fucking random men to get over him. I dated someone for 2 years before him. I'm 26. I just want someone I can settle down with. Why are men such trash.

Anonymous 45289

>>45288
so? pretty of people go through these things and don't repeatedly cheat on their partner. it's just an excuse.

find someone who you know appreciates you 100% from day one.

Anonymous 45290


Anonymous 45291

>>45288
He is only doing that because he feels guilty. He probably has cheated you more.

Anonymous 45293

c2f0f96d-25aa-49c7…

>>45288
Damn it anon this guy isn't worth your time in the slightest

Anonymous 45294

>>45288
>And casual low-key alcoholism
It's over. Throw him away to the wolves. Will bring nothing but problems, possibly does other drugs too but you don't know. No future. You should see him as a dead man walking.

You will regret it so much if you put up with a drug addict.

Anonymous 45299

1535817847_run.gif

I got into the relationship with a guy similar to my ex (in terms of appearance, voice, not the shitty parts). I like him but I'm scared that the trauma from my last relationship will make me overly distanced from him.

Anonymous 45321

>>45294
I mean he was drinking a lot at that point, but he isn’t now and hasn’t for like a year.

Anonymous 45322

>>45289
I mean…people make mistakes…now he just knows that isn’t what he wants to do or be or how he wants to handle hard times. I dunno. Kill all men tbh.

Anonymous 45344

>>45322
doesn’t mean the op has to suffer because of his mistakes.

Anonymous 45348

9904d5312ca4e50bb7…

>be me, febfem who leans towards women anyway (90/10)
>ego still horribly hung up on this guy that rejected me to the point of it making me extremely insecure
>torture self with it daily
>not even attracted to him anymore
>wouldn't date him if given the chance
I'm so tired, yet still dying to know why he rejected me since he wasn't clear about it. And I don't know why I care! It would be irrelevant even if I still wanted to pursue males!!!
But I'm really on the edge of manically pestering him out of the blue about this. So much time has passed since and we've built a friendship but, unfortunately, I'm insane. Deep down I guess I just want him to fuel my BDD. If it's my personality idc

Anonymous 45350

I scrolled past my post >>65940 and realized I said the opposite of what I meant and it annoyed me. Anyway the thread is locked but I'll correct myself here, in the last sentence I meant the opposite.

Anonymous 45351

>be me
>talking to guy online
>he has a pretty cute face and reads as much as I do
>one day he sends me a pic of his body
>he has man tits
>lose all attraction immediately
Wtf
Why did it have to end like this
He wasn't even overweight or anything but he still had tits for some reason?

Anonymous 45352

>>45351
Imagine the cute bra options.

Anonymous 45353

>>45348
There are a million and one reasons why he might reject you. Not all of them revolve around you, e.g. he might just not want to date now or be planning to come out the closet or maybe he only likes brunettes/red heads/Asian women/whatever.

Anonymous 45354

>>45352
I mean that's kinda funny but I'm still really upset that the best guy I could find was hiding something that was a deal breaker for me the whole time

Anonymous 45355

>>45351
Could he be trans? Or ex-trans?

Anonymous 45356

>>45351
Was he topless? Does he have a lot of muscle? Sometimes huge pecs can look very obvious under a t-shirt.

Anonymous 45357

>>45354
milk that femboy anon

Anonymous 45358

>>45355
My theory is that he drank too much milk as a kid
>>45356
I mean he has a good frame but they were clearly tits
And yea his shirt was off
>>45357
Ahhhhh
These jokes just make me feel bad
He was so cute and nice why did he have to have tits

Anonymous 45359

>>45358
could he be a troon

Anonymous 45365

>>45359
I very seriously doubt it
He never brought it up, seems more right wing than left, and looks pretty masculine aside from the tits
If he was a troon there'd be no way he'd pass
He's 6 foot 1, has borad shoulders and a strong jawline
Tits and a wig can't fix that

Anonymous 45366

>>45365
You have not seen many troons

Anonymous 45367

>>45366
Well I mean I guess but that's not my point
My point is that I'm upset to have lost all attraction to a guy who I thought was really great because he has tits

Anonymous 45373

fd350d5f-1ab2-4d10…

>>45365
>Right wing
He's a troon

Anonymous 45374

>>45373
Trans rights is a left wing thing
Biden thinks 8yos should be able to change gender

Anonymous 45375

>>45374
Plenty of trannies are nazis who wish they had the courage to kill themselves already though.

Anonymous 45378

>>45375
I've never seen one before in my life but okay

Anonymous 45380

>>45351
Gynecomastia? I think it's a medical problem of some kind, either hormonal or a medication side effect or something like that.

Anonymous 45381

>>45367
Maybe you could learn to love them?
Or he could have a doctor fix them?

Anonymous 45385

>>45351
It's perfectly normal for boys to have boobs depending on their heritage.
https://sciencenordic.com/adolescents-denmark-videnskabdk/one-in-two-boys-develops-breasts/1399863

Anonymous 45390

>>45381
Hahahah learn to love them? Gross no way.
And what can I do? Un-ghost him and tell him to go to the doctor?
>>45385
That may be so, but it doesn't make it any less unappealing to me.

Anonymous 45391

>>45390
Yes, but are you more interested in the him he is now or the him he could be when his manboobs go away? (Statistically that is, which is the standard unless you have proof of an underlying medical condition.)

Anonymous 45392

>>45391
If his manboobs were gone he would be a pretty good guy
But idk if that will ever happen and it's not like I can just ask him so I give up I guess?

Anonymous 45393

>>45385
No its not normal… Its a genetical disorder or its a tranny. They need to revert back if tranny or just idk find someone into moobs in the case of gyno.

Anonymous 45394

>>45393
>idk find someone into moobs in the case of gyno.
Either a messed up fetishist or someone with rock bottom standards
Neither of which are me lol

Anonymous 45396

tenor.gif

I am watching a playthrough of Origami King.
As someone who hasn't played a PM game since TTYD it's essentially an emotional fountain of youth.

And I'm also changing a monster for tommorrow's Monstertober. Was originally gonna be the demon version of a character from an anime, but I prefer a different character with less unflattering memories.

Anonymous 45399

>>45390
You ghosted him over it?

Anonymous 45401

>>45399
Yeah. Was that wrong or not? I feel like it would be too hard to say "sorry I don't want to talk to you anymore because you have boobs"

Anonymous 45402

>>45401
I'm sure that wouldn't feel great to hear either, but imagine how you would feel if you sent a pic of yourself to a guy you liked and he just instantly stopped replying to you.
You can't help not being attracted to him, but I think it'd be nice to try and let him down gently instead of making him feel like shit about his body.

Anonymous 45403

>>45402
Eh
I've been ghosted by other men before so idk

Anonymous 45404

virgen del Apocali…

i have an irrational fear of statues and old paintings like picrel, and it really bothers me because i love all kinds of art and while i can appreciate the beauty of ancient statues and paintings they scare the shit out of me

Anonymous 45408

my boyfriend came inside me without my consent and i feel really weird about it, can't afford the morning after pill and im prochoice but an abortion would fuck so heavy with my head psychologically because i do someday want a baby and i would always mourn the one i got rid of despite reason. i asked him what if i get pregnant?? he just said "i don't care" .. "maybe i want you to get pregnant" i love him and i want to marry him but i feel kind of violated but at the time it was happening i didnt say no i kind of didnt think he was serious!! i let him do it yesterday but that was bc i had a pill!! he knows i dont have anything now that would work…

Anonymous 45409

>>45408
Your boyfriend raped you anon, go to a sexual health clinic and break up with him

Anonymous 45417

1548185259673.jpg

I just had a breakdown that caused me to delete all social media. I will never interact with anyone else but my brother and boyfriend again.

Anonymous 45418

>>45409

>>45408
This. Not sure if you’re still taking responses but there is probably a girl here who many need this information someday.
If you’re on a college campus go to student health or just go a free clinic and tell them the situation they’ll give you Plan B or Ella (a stronger version of Plan B that works for longer) at a nominal price and a pamphlet to a rape crisis center

Anonymous 45421

>>45408
It's cheaper on Amazon.

Anonymous 45422

1571241123229.jpg

I always think I'm over my Papa Problems(tm) but I still just start tearing up at the sight of any man who resembles him. I want to get more involved with his side culturally but it's going to be hard as fuck when almost every middle aged man I meet will just make me cry uncontrollably.

Perhaps worst of all, none of these men deserve to ever be compared to him even subconsciously. He was an absolute disaster.

Anonymous 45428

>>45417
Good.

Anonymous 45429

I want to get away from him. He's been in my life since I was 17. I'm 22 now. I'm not allowed to have a boyfriend but I still have to be all "his," I'm definitely a lot stronger than before but he still manages to have a hold on me. I'm pretty sure if I do leave the first thing he's gonna do is sic his friends on me, like he did whenever I tried to leave in the past. The dumbest part of me is hesitant to just buck up and leave just because it's been a part of my life for so long, off and on. I just need to bite the bullet already ffs. Also get actual help for my mental bullshit.
>>45408
your bf is a creep. Leave before it gets worse, I'm serious.

Anonymous 45434

>>45408
You have 2 options here essentially, but let me be clear, this was basically rape, I can tell you don't want to throw him to the tender mercies of the courts, but no matter what option you choose you need to let him know that you feel like he raped you when he did this to you.

Bite the bullet and leave him if he's consistently like this when it comes to him doing things to you, it's a matter of respect and dignity at that point.
Or, if you REALLY want to stay with him, tell him that what happened was completely unnacceptable, that if he really does care about what you want that he shouldn't try to force you to do it before you're ready. Depending on how he responds, stay with or leave him.

Get to a clinic before you do any of this.

Anonymous 45435

>>45434
I would advise just sending a sort message saying that you are ending things, don't contact you, and blocking him. Don't wait for a reply and don't get sucked into excuses or giving him another chance.

Anonymous 45438

>>45434
>throw him to the tender mercies of the courts
Regardless of whether one personally considers it to be rape, is legal action even an option? It doesn't seem the sort of thing that the law would define as rape.

Anonymous 45439

>>45408
>at the time it was happening i didnt say no i kind of didnt think he was serious!
Did he ask you/tell you that he was going to cum inside, and you just thought he was bluffing?

Anonymous 45440

>>45059
I have been thinking about me loving someone, but I don't want to be a burden on someone. I have stupid trust issues and I tend to withdraw away from people yet wants to be with others I hate it.

Anonymous 45441

>>45438
I think it is in some countries. This is what Assange did.

Anonymous 45447

>>45428
Yeah, so much pain just got lifted of me when I did it. I had some feelings of regret and emptiness later. I even felt some fear because I basically lost foundation for my life, as sad it is. I really have no real life outside online world.

Now though I feel so free. Everything that was ruining my mental health is gone now. I feel so at peace and I have no ugly, bitter thoughts anymore. Past is in the past now. This is a new beginning. This is what I kinda like about online world, if shit gets too much you can just restart everything, unless you have made a lot of online presence that you are really famous or something.

Anonymous 45448

image0-10.jpg

>>45422
I'm in the same boat, genuinely upset that connecting with that part of myself is ruined

Anonymous 45450

bb6d4b54b8fb7325f2…

this is pathetic, but i need to vent. ana sperg incoming
i started reading things from this one retarded internet community out of boredom, and at some point, they started posting thinspo/pro-ana content alongside their political and schizo occult posts. for some reason, it triggered me, don't know why. i got very motivated to lose weight, eat healthier foods and think about my body size and shape. i never directly interacted with those people, just read their posts and laughed at the dumb things, but then i internalized all the things about being skinny.
now, that community is gone because of doxxing and other internal drama i don't know much about or even if it's true, and i'm annoyed because there's literally no health communities or even "ana groups" that hit the same way. none whatsoever. i don't know why i can't just be a normal person who follows health blogs/IGs and relies on positive content, or even just someone who's satisfied with "ana twitter". it's all just not enough, idk.
there were so many fucked up aspects of that community and the people in it disgusted me, but i also related to some things, and i even saw other girls sometimes retweet and repost shit from them, which made it feel like there was this quiet, esoteric group of girls on the internet like me, ironically watching these scrotes flail like autists, but taking pieces of whatever seemed correct. i don't know how to explain it.
i'm largely glad they're gone because they were freaks, but the unhealthy part of my brain is upset at losing its stupid anachan fix and i don't know how to cope

Anonymous 45500

Need to vent about this because it never happened to me before and I feel so stupid but I have a huge crush on my boss (old, married, children). Pretty sure he sees me as his daughter or something so that makes it even worse. I hate that he is so endearing and nice urgh. Silver lining is that at least I'm really motivated to go to work every morning.

Anonymous 45501

>>45500
I felt that way about my also married with children HR generalist at my last job, too. He was an extremely kind and attractive man, and on even the shittiest days was kind of my motivation to go to work every day. I think one of the hardest things about being layed off was knowing I wouldn't get to speak with such a gentle, handsome man every so often, lol. But I also forced myself to find ways to prevent my having to talk to him a lot, only because I felt like I was terrible for having a silly crush on a married man.

Anonymous 45503

i haven’t felt anything since 2017

Anonymous 45505

>>45450
do you mean kaliacc? i saw some stuff about it and was interested in finding a way in because it was triggering and i hate myself so much and just want to be tiny again (i’ve gained weight over a year or two from binging but i eat like 1,000 calories now which still feels like binging and i feel like a huge fatass) maybe that isn’t it but it sounds similar. maybe its for the best that its not around anymore anon :( god im sorry.

Anonymous 45507

-_-
I appreciate the sentiment, but how do you think Mr. Irwin's widow felt when all those stingray's were massacred?

Anonymous 45511

As I'm about to finish watching a playthrough of Origami King soon I can say this without sounding dumb (or saturated in treacle):

Ever since I played the first PM in 2001 I've dreamt for many years to have someone make an OVA in the style of a late 80s, or early 90s, anime.

I can put that now unnecessary dream to rest.

Anonymous 45515

You have a real shitshow of an attitude it gave me heart palpitations like damn. Get off your high horse and go fuck yourself. Pretending like you know it all and having a bad personality is what kept you out of that dream job and college program, not because you were discriminated against. I really ought to have called you out instead of keeping the peace but alright, you're out of my life now so it doesn't matter.

Anonymous 45521

I hit it off with a girl well today but I still feel so empty. Everyone says they care about me yet whenever I try to talk about my feelings I'm immediately shut down and told I'm overreacting. It feels so invalidating, I've started to become used to not validating my own emotions so instead of being sad I just get very angry. This is the best I've been doing and everyone around me keeps trying to fuck it up once again. Whenever I try to communicate no one ever fucking listens. It's hurtful. It really hurts.

Anonymous 45531

D8d-orrXkAAzOZr.pn…

I want a relationship but at the same time I enjoy being single and not being tied down. I've been on a good number of dates but I haven't really felt much from any of them, with both of my last relationships I was friends with them both for over a year before I started having feelings for them and dating them but I doubt that most people would be willing to wait

Anonymous 45532

746e814c-e6ca-47a8…

I was recently told by a girl I was seeing that she started falling for someone else and that they agreed to be exclusive. I'm fine with this as I'm seeing other people too and I'm glad she was honest and direct with me as well as I did actually like her. The one thing that bothers me is the gender of the person she got with. I really hope they're a guy because you can't really compare a man to a woman in terms of what they can offer you and I obviously can't give this girl babies or a relationship that's near universally accepted. But if they're another girl then that actually would hurt a lot more in a petty "what does she have that I don't have" kinda way. I'm obviously not gonna ask her because that makes me look childish but I did bring up this way of thinking to her before and she reffered to this person with gender neutral pronouns so I'm worried that they're a woman as well

Anonymous 45538

f70372172621b52ecc…

>>45059
I feel like a total failure.
I originally at the start of the semester had 7 classes. Well i've dropped out of 3 of them because I couldn't handle it. I just now failed an exam for one of the classes that i'm in and didn't turn in an essay so i've basically failed that class too. Now I only have a chance to finish 3 of my classes. Maybe it's just because it's all online cause of corona but maybe it's just me being a silly goose and keeping up with the same bullshit that i've kept up with for 3 years.

Anonymous 45539

>>45538
Why did you take 7 classes? I don't know the credit hours, but that sounds overloaded.

Anonymous 45551

Family dog is about to be put down and I can't handle it. She's outwardly so happy and energetic, it just feels like we're killing her. She has a tumor on her belly that broke open a couple weeks ago and if my mom had acted sooner we could have operated it but she just kept talking about "making a decision".

Mom wants to act like nothing is happening, told me "not to think about it" and my family has a weird thing about crying around each other (even at dads funeral I couldn't handle crying in front of them). But I keep breaking down sobbing and I'm worried I'm wasting my last few hours with her by not doing enough. Especially since I can't be around my mom rn and the dog wants to be around her. I had the dog on my lap during dinner and mom yelled at me for letting her up but jesus christ she's going to live four more hours who cares about etiquette.

Also octobers are cursed, 2016 my other dog died, 2017 grandpa and 2018 my dad. I'm legit getting anxiety each time october rolls around.

Sorry if this is a little incoherent. Also sorry if this isn't really vent material, just didn't know where else to go.

Anonymous 45553

>>45551
I'm so sorry anon, my dog meant the world to me and her passing in a similar way devastated me. Get that puppy on your lap as much as you want, take some cute photos. When my dog died I clipped some of her fur and put it into one of these tiny little bottles for jewelry. I don't wear it but I keep it in a drawer with a nice photo of her.

Anonymous 45562

>>45538
Just focus on those 3 classes. I've taken on too many classes in the past and then dropped them, more than once. I've failed a whole year and had to resit.

I'm now studying again and it's 10x easier. What I've realised is that background stress can make it harder to study at all. Sometimes you might not be aware it is there until you look back and are able to contrast with a more stable situation. These as not normal times so just try your best and don't feel bad. You might also consider dropping out altogether and then started again in the future under better circumstances.

Anonymous 45563

>>45551
Our dog had tumours and was too old for an operation. She stopped eating, getting thinner and thinner. She could barely move and kept peeing herself, which she seemed unaware of. The day that the vet came to put her down she was breathing intensely and barely acknowledged us. The vet said she would have had a heart attack that day. This all happened rapidly within a week or so.

It was difficult to put her down as her mind seemed fine but it was her body that was failing. She was going to die soon either way and we made the choice for it be while we were hugging her and painlessly.

You have to focus on the happy years that your dog lived and remember that dying is a natural part of life. Your dog won't be able to live much longer and putting her down before she is really suffering is the humane thing to do, even if it is difficult to do emotionally.

I kept some of our dog's fur too and put it inside a wrapped up heart scan and placed this next to a photo of her.

Anonymous 45566

>>45538
I'm so sorry, anon.
Just so you feel a bit better, I've failed uni entrance exams 3 times and going to my 4th year trying. I'm getting old and haven't even been admissed to uni.

This new setting has put a pressure on students, it's not all entirely your fault. Please be ok and I wish you success on the other 3 classes.

Anonymous 45571

IMG_20201021_20411…

>>45553
I let her into my room to sleep in my bed one last time - she actually puked shortly after this picture was taken which I found pretty funny. When she was younger she'd puke in my bed and I'd have to wake mom up to help me change the sheets in the middle of the night. It was such an inconvenience and yet I'll miss it in a way.

>>45563
It was a lot easier with my other dog, she seemed "ready" when we put her down in front 2016. But with this one she's still so lively and it feels more like killing her than letting her go. I suppose she has worsened quickly these past week and my friend said small dogs never show getting worse until a day or two before.

Anonymous 45580

1584479881097.jpg

>>45505
yyyup, that was them. i'm surprised that someone else knows of them. you're right that it's probably better this way, but it still sucks. it all sucks. please be kind to yourself anon

Anonymous 45589

And I finished watching the Playthrough of Origami King..

I'm going to change the monster I had planned for the 30th.It was originally going to be me getting my brain eaten out by a zombie version of a character I hate, but this game cheered me up in ways I wish I knew how to explain, so screw that noise.

Cheers.

Anonymous 45591

kbd.jpg

>>45571
Oh anon I'm so sorry. If you have more pics or just memories of your pup pls feel free to share them. And if you feel like you can't cry in front of your family at least you can cry with us here, losing a dog is heartbreaking even if we're always aware it must happen one day.

My childhood dog also had to be put down pretty suddenly, even if she was 16 already. Her motor control worsened over just two days because of a tumour, on the second morning she couldn't use her hind legs so she crawled to the food bowl like nbd and really tried to go on a walk. I also found it so sad that her personality was still the same, almost like she just had some temporary ailment and would be back on her feet soon, but it was comforting that she never had to feel disoriented or afraid and was never in much pain because we humans can tell when it's best to let go.

I still miss her sometimes. Pic rel is the closest I could find on google, I don't have digital pictures of her unfortunately.

Anonymous 45593

>>45591
Shiba?

Anonymous 45601

>>45593
Ohh I see the resemblance but nope! The breed is rare outside of Finland and the pic is a bit misleading with respect to size haha but she was a Karelian Bear Dog.

Anonymous 45613

tumblr_pizhxkKk2M1…

I touch myself to the idea of someone scratching my head or cuddling me in a warm embrace. I'm so alone

Anonymous 45614

headpat automation…

>>45613
get yourself one of these bad boys(pic related).
all you need to get one yourself is a room to keep it in, some decently strong rope, and some chlorofoam.

Anonymous 45618

I'm fucking suicidal.

I'm in University for Psychology, taking online courses so I'm stuck at home with my parents every day.

I have no friends, no skills or talent, no personality, horrible self-esteem, and I get anxious anytime I interact with strangers, even online. My social skills are practically nonexistent. I literally feel like I was built to self-destruct.

I spend every day on imageboards and YouTube trying to avoid this bleak reality, but I'm seriously hitting my limit on avoidance and daydreaming. I want to end my stupid pointless life. I don't want to be alive.

Anonymous 45620

>>45618
You need to see a therapist anon.

Anonymous 45621

I saw a professional Psychologist and Psychiatrist biweekly, for more than a year. I'm the same person except now I take antidepressants and sometimes amphetamines when I have to crunch schoolwork. I can't fix anything anymore, I'm just a hollow existence.

I'm so close to giving up on my life but I keep holding on to this stupid, vain idea that somehow things will change in any capacity and I won't be a lonely useless loser. I'm 21, almost 22, and I'm done with my pathetic life.

Anonymous 45622

fucking hate myself, meant
>>45621 for >>45620

Anonymous 45623

>>45622
What do you want in life?

Anonymous 45624

>>45623
I don't know. I wish I had a purpose.

Anonymous 45625

>>45624
What do you like to do?

Anonymous 45629

>>45618
I truly don’t believe a person has no skill or personality. Anon you don’t deserve to be under such harsh standards. You’re worthy of living. If you can, please seek help. You’re worth it.

Anonymous 45630

Been best friends with him for almost 15 years and we've been together for ~3. We're in our late 20's and I just had the "do you want kids someday" talk with him.
He wants biological kids. And I know he wants a son.
The thought of giving birth terrifies me and I don't think I want to balance a career and be a mother.
He's talking about three years from now. Bitch, I graduate in just under two. I'll be lucky if I have a 401k in 5 years.

Maybe I'll change my mind in the future. Maybe I won't. But part of me thinks I should run away now and save myself any future pain.

I'm terrified. I can't stop crying.

Does his love for me really mean less than a child, than extending his family line? Does what he have mean nothing to him if I don't bear his children?

I'm so fucking scared.

Anonymous 45631

>>45630
Sorry, but it sounds like you are fundamentally incompatible. Don’t have a kid if you are not 100% sure.

Anonymous 45633

>>45625
I already said I just whittle my time away with random internet b.s. like YouTube and whatnot. Sometimes I play Minecraft. Otherwise I'm doing schoolwork. I don't know what you're getting at with these questions…
>>45629
I'm living proof that's not true.

Anonymous 45634

>>45633
You've said how you spend your time but not actually what you like or enjoy. I'm trying to help you figure out what to do anon.

Anonymous 45637

>>45633
I’m only sure you have a personality. It comes in lots of ranges. You don’t deserve to be under a standard of what is a true personality. You’re worth more and unique. Skill can also come in different ranges and doesn’t need to be general. It can be for a specific thing and you can pride yourself in that. <3

Anonymous 45642

I love my boyfriend, but I don't know if I can stay with him because I'm sick of porn usage, period. I want sex as much if not more than him. What's the reason besides wanting to see more naked women than me? What more does he get out of it? It's hard because I have felt for a while he's the one person I love (I've been in relationships before but have never been in love, whereas I have with him). However, I think it's true there is more to a relationship than purely love. Sex is a huge part of my relationship and it's sickening to me he still has to supplement with it. Is it really that prudish of me to be over him watching it, let alone consider breaking up because I don't think I can long term feel okay with that?

Anonymous 45643

>>45642
I also don't know what his porn usage is like, in truth. I'm guessing it's at least 1-2x a day when I'm gone, but it's possible he uses it when I'm at his house which is around 5 days a week. He saves photos of instagram models ocassionally (it pales in comparison to the everything else he saves on instagram). So, I don't think he's exceedingly bad, at least, not bad enough to where it clearly interferes with our sex life, though I still don't prefer it. However, I don't know for a fact how deep he is into it. I've always maintained an attitude of not trusting until I'm given reason to trust in these areas due to past experience and he acts as if that is unfair of me.

He also acts afraid of a slippery slope situation - he'll stop doing this, what next? I've assured him that's not the case, but that doesn't assuage him.

Anonymous 45645

hooked up w this guy and can’t stop thinking about him
we didn’t even have sex but everything we did was so nice, especially the cuddling, and i just hope i can see him again
or at least i hope i can remove him from my thoughts soon

Anonymous 45652

i stupidly invited my father to do crossfit at my gym, now he loves it and signed up for an entire month 3x a week…i wasnt thinking when i invited him because he has a very grump/bitchy personality and it was a good time to get away from him. fuck.

Anonymous 45659

>>45658
Good taste. First to visit though to work in them I would suggest getting either a Working Holiday Visa (The US is not eligible for this visa) or getting a degree in English so you can be an English teacher abroad.

Anonymous 45663

>>45630
>I don't think I want to balance a career and be a mother
Do you have to? What if he was the primary caretaker instead of you?

Anonymous 45673

>>45663
I asked him that and he said he probably would do it.
He'd be a great dad, I have no doubt in my mind. And if I was to raise a child it would be with him. I just don't want to get pregnant. Its a very real, personal choice of mine.
Maybe by the time he's ready we van get a surrogate or a test tube baby

Anonymous 45677

>>45630
why did you guys wait to have this convo so late in the game? this needs to be literally like the first question you guys ask. you can't compromise on something like this and having children definitely adds much more instability to your life, and typically, honestly, contributes to the disintegration of marriages and relationships. doubly so if you aren't even sure that you want kids. i would leave. one of you is going to be unhappy, whether you decide to have a child (or three), or not.

Anonymous 45678

i love him so much and at the same time i fucking hate him, like, he sends me songs and all i can think about to them is him but i know he listens to them thinking about something else

and i know its my fault we arent together because im fucking neurotic but i just wish i wasnt his second choice and i wish he wasnt my only fucking frien

honestly i wish i just stopped feeling this way and got over him but nope i have to get attatched to people all the time

Anonymous 45680

1459043989222.jpg

I am in a very happy relationship with my long term bf and yet dreams about my former anime husbando still make me happier than anything. I hate this.

Anonymous 45685

Lol, the Scissors from Origami King remind me of a perfected version of a character I made 5 years ago..

Anonymous 45694

Sometimes I worry my mental health is getting worst with age. But the fact that I'm worried about such a thing still shows that I'm still somewhat sane. I can't tell if it's worst to be sane. I rather not know that I'm getting worst. I don't want to be saved.

Anonymous 45695

>>45694
Worrying is no indication if you're sane or not. If anything, if the worry is excessively affecting your life, you are mentally ill. I guess you would be right that being mentally ill doesn't make you "insane", since you're probably defining "insane" as delusional.

Anonymous 45696

>>45695
I should state, the worrying all the time is called anxiety and it is a mental illness, it doesn't make you "insane", it means you have a mental illness.

Anonymous 45701

IMG_20190415_11501…

>>45591
Thanks friend. We put her down this morning and it was rough. When the vet gave her the first shot she struggled so much, wandering around the table and whimpering as she fell over. I hugged her but it didn't seem to help much. I wish I would've been allowed to hold her, do it in a calmer environment.

Mom was weird about it, wanting to put on a muzzle instead of just letting me hold her so she doesn’t bite (thank god I could convince her of that at least) and not touching or being near her while she was struggling. Eventually though Lily just fell asleep with her head on my hand.

I thought it'd be easier once it's done but it's not. I keep thinking I hear her wander around, I instinctively go to her bed to pet her, I look down while cooking thinking she'll be there hoping for something to fall down.

Here's a picture of her in the laundry basket - she always looked for our clothes when we weren't around. Mom constantly complained that she'd pull her pajamas onto the floor to sleep on them.

Anonymous 45703

>>45701
for future reference, there is home euthanasia. i would recommend it. not sure if corona has affected that, but it's really the best bet for any pet.

Anonymous 45705

>>45703
I pushed for that but it somehow wasn't an option. I couldn't even really hold her while it was happening.

Anonymous 45708

>>45695
I do have depression and anxiety but lately it feels crippling even though I'm getting help.

Anonymous 45717

So, our government banned abortions for fetal defects. Fuck this country, I'm going child free.

Anonymous 45720

>>45717
Poland? I saw a headline about that just now.

Anonymous 45725

>>45720
Yes. The Constitutional Court outvoted the anti-abortion law made by some pseudocatholic pro-life activists.

Anonymous 45726

>>45725
Because that worked so well for Romania…

Anonymous 45733

d66.gif

Wish I had the courage to talk to my old friends again

Anonymous 45735

>>45717
You can just move to superior Sweden.

Anonymous 45742

>>45735
Are you from sweden? Not that anon, but I am planning to move there soon. Is it as nice as it seems?

Anonymous 45743

>>45725
Poland is in the EU, don't you have that freedom of movement stuff?
You could just head to one of the other countries for a couple days and then fly back to Poland after you've had it done.

Anonymous 45744

>>45743
How many women have the money and time to do that.

Anonymous 45745

There's a reason I have greater respect for internet animators than I do for pretty much any other kind of animator:

I've been there and have failed to do more than one flash animation I'm not ashamed of. You could even say I at some point thought comics were easier (even though I've been through enough to realise they're just as hard if not borderline impossible to pull off once you graduate middle/secondary school). Yes, this is a case of relating with them better, but it's also because these are people of passion. The intimacy of what they are willing to go through is there in their works. Even when they DO give up they still keep doing it regardless of what people may think, because public opinion is one of the things they sacrifice to maintain that vision and spirit they care about regardless of what.

Forgive my out-of-the-blue example but it's somewhat akin to when Rock Lee and Gaara in Naruto fought once. Yet even after he was defeated, and as far as unconscious, Rock Lee still got up because he had that apparent spirit.

Sure it's possible to see that in animation shown on other media, it's just harder to believe that one single person worked on them.

FFS Edd Gould was basically the Freddie Mercury of internet cartoons if you knew his story while Jarrad Wright didn't even need Flash animation to make a series that would end up with a feature length film (three if 13 to 55 minutes count), not that it didn't work out just as well with Dick Figures.

I'm not saying people who work on any other licensed/contracted animation don't work hard because they do.

I just am only familiar in a field where I would only know how to play catch when a professional champion league isn't present.

Anonymous 45746

>>45744
Time, I don't know, but isn't inter-EU travel relatively cheap?

Anonymous 45748

download2019070600…

I just want my boyfriend to break up with me. I've been not super interactive with him and haven't seen him in months even though I could've. He's passive aggressive, he claims to be demisexual and a virgin before he met me but I doubt both given what my friends told me they found out, he tries to make me jealous and has openly hit on uninterested women but I just never cared really. I haven't had sex in about 6 months now, and it sucks but I hate him too much to even allow him to do it again while he gets upset about how bored and uninterested I look during it, even though I told him to get it over with.

I hate that I do this, but I fear the fact his passive aggressiveness is also actual aggressive behavior. He's shaken me sometimes when he didn't need to over small verbal fights, I have a recording of him yelling at me in a car on the way back from a date for 15 minutes and then apologizing (this is very common), he's yelled at me a few times and the thing is… I think he thinks I'm at fault for all of his behavior. I never had this happen in a relationship before, and it's really just him and he'll blame it on his CPTSD. And there's been a few fights where he gets loud and in your face, and then he apologizes profusely and cries after. He's talked about marriage during this time, and I hate it because it's just a way to build up false hope in me. He says he loves me and I believe it, but it's not a love I want where I'm worried if he'll cheat on me to make me feel bad, ignore me to do the same, badmouth about me to his friends and then praise me in the same vein, I just want to be treated like a human again, not a black and white devil and goddess. I've never been in an abusive relationship before. This is honestly the worst one I've ever been in.

He also did this odd thing too, he hid my social security card from me for months. I stopped living with him before quarantine started (thank god), and I was looking for it for so long and couldn't find it. He knew I was looking for it too. Now that I haven't visited or seen him in ever it's magically… above his fridge. It might be me overthinking things but I never would put it there. I know he put it there but fucking why? I'm going to ask him to just drop it off in his mailbox so I can pick it up so I don't have to interact with this tiny angry man in person. But god I hate that he knows it now he's just so fucking obsessive and I just don't feel safe enough to end this since he's just so malicious and I know he's just going to yell at me and then make it out like I was the bad one in everything when I've been grey-rocking this whole trip to just end it. He didn't message me at all today, I hope anons he finally ends things so I can move on with life.

Anonymous 45750

>>45748
Why don't you just leave him?

Anonymous 45751

82afba5e-d231-4b98…

>>45748
Anon please end things with him, this all sounds really stressful

Anonymous 45752

>>45748
do you think he'll try to hurt you if you try to break up with him? i pray he does it on his own if you feel too unsafe to do it yourself.

>>45750
>>45751
probably because he's abusive and she's scared of his reaction…

Anonymous 45757

>>45746
You can have no money and not be able to afford to take a day off.

Anonymous 45758

>>45752
She can always do it over text

Anonymous 45774

>>45750
I know if I tried there'd be another tantrum, it's rage and then intense sorrow. I don't know if it's his CPTSD or something else, I think the latter but he has no diagnosis. I'm more scared of the backlash of doing so.
>>45751
I think he's planning on ending things officially soon since my grey rocking has been working.
>>45752
I feel given everything there's a guarantee there'll be a verbal altercation at least, but I wouldn't be surprised if he did get physical. He's barred me from exiting a few times when he was having flashbacks related to his PTSD which was unpleasant but it's hard for me to blame him for that given his condition. I've broken up with people before and been broken up with, I'm not inherently conflict avoidant. I feel this is a very special case though.
>>45758
I would not hear the end about it if I did it that way since we've been together for a while. I'm worried he might drive over to get me to do it if I did it that way. I think just waiting it out and keeping contact minimum until he loses 100% interest is the best way.

Anonymous 45786

C358C264-2277-4A6D…

tfw a guy from work keeps trying to talk to me despite showing absolutely no indications of interest in him

Anonymous 45791

>>45789
>pursuing me
Is he actually flirting, or is he just talking to you?

Anonymous 45792

>>45351
What happened in the end anon? Did you tell him to get lost?

Anonymous 45793

>>45791
It’s flirting. He even asked for my number but I just gave him my discord (lol). I would’ve said no but I felt too awkward. I’m at work to make money, not uncomfortable small talk. I never start conversations with him. I barely make eye contact with him. I’m annoyed and I don’t care if it makes bitter, lurking incels upset.

Anonymous 45800

>>45786
Next time he speaks to you tell him you have a bf or are not interested in dating. Of he keeps doing it tell HR.

Anonymous 45801

>>45800
I will anon

Anonymous 45807

A6B959AC-1929-4654…

i have had a lot of changes in my life this past month and have been feeling really depressed lately. i’m trying to adjust to being a neet until i can start online classes in late winter. i really wish i had a pet or more to do. i’m really lucky to have a loving boyfriend, but suicide has been on my mind a lot lately. i don’t know why i feel this way…i wish i had friends but i have always been kind of an anxious loner, so it shouldn’t matter. i have so much around me i wish i could do, but i just feel like crying and sleeping. i don’t like to be this way…i want to be productive and happy! i contacted an old psychiatrist, but i just hope this passes and is all temporary. i miss my mom and kitten and i don’t want my boyfriend to get annoyed at me for feeling this way one day, but its only come back as of lately. i just want to know what i should do to help this feeling. it makes me feel like my life is over. sitting home and crying and sleeping…i have goals but its more of the thought: does it even matter? why try? i began to binge eat but im tackling that (luckily it was never unhealthy food, but just eating at odd hours to cope) i want to try to exercise more because that does help! what are things i can do aside from reading and watching films? we go out sometimes but he works 6day sna week fuck this is so useless and money is tight but he said hes going to get me some stuff for hobbies when he can. hes super sweet and im so lucky to have him so why am i depressed? could pet loss and moving from home recently do all of this?

Anonymous 45808

>>45807
also i have stimulants that i use to take so im wondering if i should try taking those again to help me

Anonymous 45811

Alright, I'll bite:

Remember that one episode of South Park with Mel Gibson? Well replace Stan or Kenny with me, and Mel Gibson with, ahem, a director from New Zealand, and you have my feelings towards a certain movie:

If you have a creed then that's fine, but you should focus on the more positive aspects of it in a piece of entertainment rather than channeling your anger in such a contemptuous manner when writing characters. A ton of people went through a hell similar to that in those times, and if you assume everyone already has their sympathy engrained for you enough to leave it unearned when developing your characters in said piece of entertainment then I may as well watch stuff like the following trailer.

Anonymous 45812

20201023_130713.jp…

Do you ever realize that there are going to be people from your generation that accomplish your childhood dreams? I wanted to be a concept artist. But I'll be 21 next year, and I can't draw at all, and I've settled for a CS degree (I'm not the best programmer either lol). Thinking that there are other people my age (or younger) that are doing stuff like designing characters for projects or visualizing their thoughts makes me kind of sad, bros.
I also sometimes-often think of everyone (my "friends", though now that I'm older and looking back on my life I realize they were actually pretty terrible) would actively tell me that I couldn't do what I want to do lol. And specifically because I was "me".

Getting depressed.

Anonymous 45815

>>45812
Why can't you self study or take classes in your spare time? If you have talent and good portfolio, no one will care how old you are.

Anonymous 45822

-_-

To make a long story short: I was jealous.

To make a short story sense:
https://youtu.be/sSYeqZYgSUk
>2012
https://www.tapatalk.com/groups/foxtrotdiscussionarea/the-sect-t2086.html#p95375
>2011

Can we pleeeeaaaaAAAAASE get our heads out of the past already?? O-R A-M I G-O-N-N-A H-A-V-E T-O S-P-E-L-L I-T O-U-T A-G-A-I-N ?

Anonymous 45827

>>45807
I feel a very similar way, anon. I just want to die. I can't get enjoyment from anything but my boyfriend. I feel like that'll bother him. No, it already has.

Anonymous 45836

>>45812
Same. I wanted to be a storyboard artist but being a poorfag has led me to study something more practical. I hate what I'm studying so much that despite it being easy I procrastinate so much that my grades are average.

Some mutuals I have on my art account are attending art school or are just making money off their art and it does eat at me sometimes. I still love to draw and do it often, but it stings that I'll never have my dream life.
>I can't draw
Just do it and you'll eventually improve. It's like working out. Drawing and lifting weights is the same shit.

Anonymous 45840

I want to die whenever I'm away from my boyfriend. I hate BPD.

Anonymous 45842

i found some weird notepad entry that i do not recall writing. on my birthday too, 7am. really fucking weirded out and it doesnt even sound like i typed it. i think i had a serious episode that day. must be why i cant remember.

Anonymous 45850

I think I should be on mood stabilizers.

I miss getting black out drunk while browsing /x/.

Anonymous 45851

I'm becoming more judgemental and I don't even feel bad because of it.

Anonymous 45853

God I'm so fucking tired of people. Wanted to become a psychologist, parents ended up talking me out of it because 'my grades aren't good enogh and I would be a bad psychologist anyway'. Sure doesn't stop anyone treating me as their therapist every time one tiny thing gets on their nerves. I could listen, I really could. Offer useful advice at times. But I'm fucking tired. I'm tired of being treated as everyone's problem solver and any time I need a favor everyone's too busy, doesn't care or has something better to do. Fuck the lot of you and fuck me for not killing myself already.

Anonymous 45857

>>45812
Same, I always wanted to draw well but I have absolutely 0 talent so I never really bothered, but it is so depressing how some people can draw such wonderful things without even trying

Anonymous 45858

>>45853
I know this will be hard, but you really need to set your foot down and stop letting people use you. Unfortunately we live in a selfish world and people will use you and throw you away if you let them. I am sorry you are an empath but you need to value yourself first.

Anonymous 45859

maid.jpg

a couple nights ago i got drunk and slept with a guy just because he reminded me of guys who'd be mean to me in school and i was feeling nostalgic
the night after i found out he has a gf and i feel kinda bad i have no way of contacting her

Anonymous 45860

My prof was so rude to me, she humiliated the hell out of me today thinking that she did some ground-breaking shit when i was just asking a question that involves last week's lesson. On top of that, she always go easy on the guys but never the girls in my class, even for the littlest detail like she doesnt like it when girls let their hair down and force us to tie our hair up. Jfc i hope karma beat the hell out of her.

Anonymous 45863

>>45853
what are your parents on? it's not even hard to become a psychologist. people with the shittiest grades become them easily. don't listen to them. they're not only assholes, but they're so wrong. i know it's difficult to remain strong in the face of such pointless nastiness and denigration, but i promise you are capable of it and that you still have the opportunity to do become one. maybe try to distance yourself from the people who seek to use you. you don't have to be rude, but just… don't answer, or answer with short messages that help to reinforce your emotional and mental boundaries and show that you are a priority and you won't be tolerating being walked all over any longer, that it's not all about them.

Anonymous 45864

>>45857
If it makes you feel better, my favorite artists aren't "good",they draw in a more cartoonish style and anatomy, lights and shadows and colors aren't perfect or even good sometimes, but i still like their art a lot and get happy when they post. So it may sound cliche but even your doodles that YOU think are ugly or not on a good enough level could attract fans and just make you happy to be expressing yourself and drawing.

Anonymous 45870

How hurtful is the silent treatment to you guys, from 1-10? How cruel is it to give someone the silent treatment, then use their reaction to being rejected and ignored when they are trying to facilitate closeness and care, against them? As if their reaction to being purposely shut out for days to weeks justifies more ostracization. What do you think about people who act like the silent treatment is no big deal?

Anonymous 45871

>>45870
I dont think its too hurtful for me, but Im extremely stubborn so if someone doea that to me Ill just double down on it and wouldnt sat anything to them till they made the first move.

How bad it is depends on the actual scenario, whos doing it and why and for how long, but its childish, for sure. Unless you actually want to break contact with that person forever. To answer your specific question it depends what your reaction to that was, exactly. If you got annoyed and called them an asshole or something thats fine on your end and shouldnt be held against you. If you murdered their family and burned down their house… you get the point.

Anonymous 45885

nvfx.jpg

Ok.

Here's why I think Origami King is the best PM game since the first two:

The first thing that drove me into Paper Mario and Paper Mario TTYD were, unsurprisingly, the titles. The idea, at the time, sounded wacky yet interesting as I was so used to seeing Mario as just a platformer in any title, and the fact he was given a more cartoony design, in a mature viewpoint like an rpg, instantly sold me upon imagining how they would pull the two off. In fact this could've even been the first game to introduce me to RPGs in general as there haven't been any others I've deemed memorable enough to finish, let alone remember. With the sequel, The thousand year door, the game took full advantage of Mario in a more elaborate environment to bring it its own lore that sparked intrigue in just the title. You could even say this brought Mario into the 21st Century better than Sunshine, seeing as the latter's environmental message brought it a decade backwards rather than give its past mythos a proper homage. After these first two, we were given titles like Super, Colour Splash, or Sticker Star, which were either uninspired or simply too rated E once its demographic grew out of the franchise.
Origami King, however, is not only inspired but works as a fascinating idea on its own. Paper Mario, in its heydays, was already a memorable title. So combining these two was like combining sour cream and onions, giving us something that we feel like we've been missing for quite a while.

The second thing is the story. The first PM was a classic case of "Not what is said but HOW it's said" as, although we were used to seeing Bowser kidnap Peach in most of the games, we never expected him to take out Mario first in a fight. This gives Mario not only a reason to go on this journey but a reason to evolve from that first battle as he does so.
TTYD takes this even further by not only having someone else kidnap Princess Peach, but for a more surreal, postmodern reason we never would've expected from even a Paper Mario game: to have her body possessed by an evil spirit known as the Shadow queen, behind the eponymous Thousand Year door, so that this cyberpunk leader known as Sir Grodus can take over the world. That game's premise alone raised the bar to the point even it couldn't climb high enough to reach it once more (until more than a decade later, of course), despite trying with Super Paper Mario (although the idea of having another villain force Bowser and Peach to marry each other not only felt convoluted but still dealt with having her be with Bowser regardless). This as far as left Colour Splash and Sticker Star to be mostly about the gameplay as Super Paper Mario was best known for that anyway.
TOK does three things arguably no other PM game has done:

1. Do less with more. Rather than reveal the villain right away, we reveal what they've done to the common denominator: Peach. After that, everything else is revealed, little by little, as we play the game, from a brother-sister feud (that feels so engaging alone we don't even care about Peach as much anymore) to a plot to destroy all the Toads, to even Bowser and his minions siding with you to go against their origami doppelgangers. The story, as a matter of fact, IS the game as it isn't revealed 100% until you face off the main antagonist and understand their tragic motives to the very end. Which leads to the 2nd thing:
2. Although they did have their emotional moments, the other PM games were mostly "I think therefore I am". Given not only the character depth but what happens to some of these characters, Origami King is definitely the "I feel therefore I am" of any Paper Mario game. It knows you know the games and, after many years, how you're old enough to understand a theme or two.
3. The same way that Blade Runner 2049 knew it was living in a world where as much as the first Blade Runner has left its mark as the movies it influenced (Terminator 2, The Matrix, Inception) Origami King knows how to adapt its visual landscapes and focus on as much of the dirty reality of the world we live in today yet still bring memorable aspects from its past into the present. To put it plainly with an example, Blade Runner 2049 begins with a panning shot of many abandoned buildings, from your average 3rd world country, before closing in on the real star of not only the movie but its predecessor: The city, in all its sci-fi glory, and adapted with a lense that has evolved from the 80s rather than completely grown out of them. TOK not only brings themes as the ones left unspoilered in the 2nd reason, but also ones that were even the roots of World War Two, as well as intense moments that are even jump-scare worthy, before we meet up with familiar faces that have also changed, to the point of allying with you, since even the first two PM games.

The final reason, albeit arguably subjective, would simply be because it reminds you why you enjoyed not only the Paper Mario games but the Mario games in general. They weren't repetitive yet they still weren't afraid to give you what you always enjoyed about them. From the way some of the Legion of Stationary recalled that piano with teeth, from Super Mario 64, yet were scarier mostly because of what they did rather than how they looked, to the way you don't even need proper partners like in other PM games to have other characters help you in battles (so as to flow with the story better), to the bittersweet ending that is bolder than any Mario game because it reflects the aforementioned times we live in and how reality affects us as much as the characters now. Some of the cut-scenes, and battles, are even cinematic to remind me how I don't really play video games anymore compared to when I did, before and after, the turn of the Millennium. It doesn't need to be said that the games HAVE been special to many fans.

Even if most of us have not only moved on, but with Origami King, the Paper Mario franchise isn't even afraid to acknowledge it anymore by doing so as well.

Anonymous 45887

>>45283
I'll play devil's advocate here. If you're over him and you're ready to move on to a new relationship than by all means do so, but if you still have feelings for him, is it possible for the two of you to work things out? Obviously, "people make mistakes" is a platitude in the face of infidelity, and I'm not saying that cheating isn't a piece of shit thing to do, but if you love him and you get the impression that he's sincere than you may be missing out on a relationship that can still be fulfilling and loving by discarding it haphazardly.

Again, I'm not saying that you SHOULD take him back. I'm just saying that if you FEEL like you still love him and want to be with him that doesn't make you naive or a fool.

Anonymous 45888

>>45630
Does your love for him mean less than a 401k? You of course have the right to live any life that you want, but if I were you I would stay away from this kind of judgmental thinking. The problem with judging is that it cuts both ways

Anonymous 45889

ElGDFoAWMAES4eo.jp…

I hate how some Americans make everything about themselves.

Anonymous 45897

>>45889
Me too anona

Anonymous 45900

>>45889
Abortions didn't get banned in Poland

Anonymous 45901

kinda venting kinda seeking advice

but i hooked up with this guy and afterwards we cuddled like all night up until he left. it was kinda intimate i guess. my friends say they dont usually cuddle with the guys they hook up with so idk if the cuddling is a good or bad thing, or if i can expect anything more in the future.

i would love something more, but i dont wanna get my hopes up.
my mind cant stop thinking about the what ifs and what happened, its exhausting.

Anonymous 45902

>>45900
Yeah, I know. I just feel angry, when people compare political issues of other countries to Trump administration. Like, they have no idea what they are talking about.

Anonymous 45923

>>45864
I don't draw anything or even doodle, whenver I try I just get very angry at myself because I cannot draw well so I rather do not bother rather than to hurt myself again

Anonymous 45924

IMG-20201025-WA000…

>>45901
It's more than likely he wasn't looking for anything special, I've hooked up with guys and cuddled them after the deed and it has no real meaning whatsoever
If you desire an actual relationship I recommend you get a dating app or look through different avenues

Anonymous 45931

The dumbest question: How to handle the fact that a person doesn't like you?

I have never done anything wrong to her, have always been there for her even though I didn't know her at all. I always let her know that if anything she can get my help or I could talk to her, after all I am not there to make enemies and I got no female friends.

Instead she would be obsessed with her own insecurities to a point where she would shittalk about me to her brothers friends. Would always stare at me as if she wants to kill me, tried turning the family against me and make up dramas. In the end she was forced to give me a gift that was obviously meant for her mother on Christmas, leaving her looking like as if she ate dozens of lemons and is about to shit herself for the rest of the celebration. (Her grandmother made her do that in front of me, thinking I wouldn't get it but I am learning their language) She would also try excluding me out of family events and talk in their language on purpose, including making comments about me. I still pretend as if I do not understand, but it hurts me. During big family meetings she would always make sure I feel lonely. She would go to a point where she would hide in bathroom to listen to me venting. And the whole idea of trying to copy my mannerisms and style is buzzare, but I already gave up on dealing with it. She would always whine on internet and blame all her life failures over her being obese when its about the way she acts and reacts to things.

I did nothing wrong. I would always be there…Polite and understanding but she would always be so pissed off towards me, especially when I am happy and the attention is towards me. Why some people are so evil? She is 5 years older than me and acts like a child.

I know she will make up an excuse for christmas or do something ridiculous, but i will still buy her a present because I have to be a better person. It'll be cheap but I can't go down to the same level as her, but her existence as a whole starts irritating me at this point. I am so tired of this.

Anonymous 45932

>>45924
What's with the cuddling obsession some people have? I don't get it. It's so uncomfortable. I feel like people romanticize it like crazy on the internet. It's so weird.

>>45901
It depends on the type of person you are. I've cuddled with guys I hooked up with and it made me no more attached or interested in them at all. Just depends on the type of person you are and how you feel towards them. It's probably not the best if you're especially sensitive, no. Hooking up in general is risky if you're that type and I'd honestly advise you not have casual, no strings attached, sex. It can be emotional torture if you're actually interested in the person.

Anonymous 45933

>>45931
Realize she is going through her own shit and you're just caught in the crossfire. It's unfortunate and hurtful, but don't take it personally. She obviously has her own problems and doesn't know how to deal with it in a way that doesn't hurt others unnecessarily. Just continue on, don't preoccupy yourself too much with it, it's not even worth wasting your time on worrying about.

Anonymous 45934

>>45931
Is your problem that you like this person and you wish they liked you back OR you think that you're entitled to everyone liking you?
From your post it looks like the second one, and my advice is to get the fuck over yourself.

Anonymous 45936

>>45931
shes obese and is jealous of you for being more attractive, ive had random girls at work and school take a disliking to me for no real reason and they were all chonkers

Anonymous 45938

original_drawn_by_…

>>45934
True but there's a difference between feeling entitled to someone liking you and not wanting someone to be hostile to you and make family meetups uncomfortable for no reason

Anonymous 45940

>>45933
I really wish I wasn't her target then, but I guess I ended up being the easiest one because her family wouldn't allow that.

>>45934
>>45938
I am not expecting everyone to like me. However I am expecting to have some respect instead of getting thrown under the bus and being humiliated at. It's okay to not like someone, but at the very least its not good to make your vendetta public. You can throw all tomatoes you want, but not in front of the whole family.
I am sorry I worded myself wrong. I still find the things she does to me really rude, let alone the fact that she thinks she is smart to try making snarky comments about me in their native language which I've been learning for a long time without telling anyone.
>>45936
The more time passes by, the more I believe that is the case. She is also a person who can't handle not being the attention of men, while also being an example of tradthot pickme. Her friends jokingly call her femcel towards women while she agrees with them and reminds everyone how traditional she is, lying that she loves cooking and cleaning while living with her elderly mother and retired grandmother and doing down to nothing. I had to watch her mother prepare clothing for her, from cleaning to ironing and placing it as if she is a child. (I was sleeping in their house for a weekend) And even so, I always end up being the one helping her mother and grandmother. I had to drive for 2 hours to water their plants (grandmother is highly allergic, mother was out of country) because she,a person who lives with them, couldn't do it. The thing is, their house and garden distance are so small that reaching her own room takes longer time than going to garden to flower plants. I also had to take care of cat and help them build their garden house because she would be playing CSGO on Discord the whole day, a 28 year old woman. She never cooks nor cleans her room, instead her poor mother does all of that.

Before she started being rude towards me, the only things she would say would be awkward compliments that would involve her degrading herself. She would give me a three word compliment just to later tell 2 sentences on how "shitty" and whatnot she is back to which I'd always have to give her a a pat on the shoulder and compliment her back, because I really thought she is a nice persona before all the shit started.

Anonymous 45941

>>45931
>Why some people are so evil? Because traits you see as being positive in yourself may be seen as negative by other people. I'm not saying she's innocent, but I doubt you've been a perfect person either. Especially with this line.
>She would go to a point where she would hide in bathroom to listen to me venting.
What were you venting about?

Anonymous 45942

I asked you to marry me. I want you to make me feel loved again. You do nothing but tell me you love me, but it doesn't mean anything anymore. I want you to tell me you want and need me and show it. I'm sick of you not telling me why we're not intimate, and getting made when I try to figure it out myself. If you think I'm ugly now, just say it. I'm sick of this. I'm sick of being a second rate player in your life after having given up every thing for the man you used to be. Where did you go?

Anonymous 45944

>>45942
I feel this so hard, anon. Hang in there. If it feels like you're not essential and not a priority, maybe it's time you move on to someone that wants to consider you a priority. Sounds like therapy is needed, but if he's not receptive to it, there's really nothing you can do. "I love you" is cheap. If he doesn't show it and repeatedly confirm to you that he does and that you're a vital part of his life, it doesn't mean anything. He shouldn't be getting angry at you for trying to fix your relationship. Sometimes these guys are just non-confrontational and don't want to be the asshole and break up.

Anonymous 45945

>>45944
It's both comforting and painful to know there are people who can relate to how I'm feeling. Its also not anger, in some ways its worse, because its apathy. Hes hiding how he feels, and gets irritated when I say I dislike that, but doesn't care enough to reassure me. He cares enough to follow through on his promises so long as he or I don't have to talk or listen to each others feelings, but I think this year has really taken its toll in that regard since we got separated by corona.

Therapy is a wonderful idea, and I think that's what I'll suggest for us before I decide to leave. I don't think this is beyond saving yet, but its getting close to being so. Stay strong love.

Anonymous 45946

1586639696048.jpg

>>45940
In that case anon, I wouldn't take this woman's issue with you too personally. She has a lot of issues to deal with which are her problem
If she wants to act like a child simply treat her like one and ignore her
Maybe encourage her to lose weight if you think that will help
If her attitude is seriously affecting your family meetups I recommend you maybe talk to her family

Anonymous 45959

Got told that I'm wasting my time/life again. I know that already but it's hard staying motivated the way things are looking. I've never been a positive person and I always prefer to do things my own pace so someone pressuring me into getting my life together in a negative way doesn't help at all. Fuck this

Anonymous 45960

>>45774

>if I tried there'd be another tantrum


At least it's just one tantrum and not a guarunteed lifetime of tantrums which it seems like you've signed up for at the moment. Even if he keeps trying to contact you or guilt you after the breakup, he is literally not your obligation anymore. You won't owe him anything and he'll eventually get bored and move on.

Anonymous 45963

a6519cd7b8a677fb0d…

Does anyone else feel like becoming a buddhist nun somewhere in the future?

I've grown so disenchanted with everything, and I practiced Buddhist before and having a community with other women and bringing a purpose to life is all I ever wished

Anonymous 45970

>>45963
I would probably get kicked out of a monastery desu. In my experience only men are emotionally placed enough to handle my neuroticism

Anonymous 45971

>>45970
Placid*

Anonymous 45974

>>45963
I've thought of it before. In school they used to tell us that kids did get sent by their parents to monestaries if they didn't know what to do with their future/if they were poor. Seems like a great idea. I got discouraged when I heard about the different rules they enforce if you are a woman though. The option to become a buddhist nun also existed though.

Anonymous 45976

45d053859add199458…

I have definitely, definitely said this before on C.C. But I'm going to say it again because it gives me .5 seconds of catharsis. If I had a lot of money, I would have 0 problems. Fuck. Why can't I just get lucky and win the lottery. That would be so perfect.

I could pay for uni, get my own place…it would be wonderful. 80k would be great. 20k would be great. Anything below 20k is pretty useless when I factor uni costs and etc. into the equation (but still appreciated).

It's just so frustrating. I have the gift of life, but a bunch of numbers on a screen and slips of paper control my entire existence.

Anonymous 45982

Heard a song that made me have a really nice fantasy about my husbando, and it feels so nice, but then it feels so bad because it's not real…
And most people would just think I'm crazy because they can't understand how someone can care so much for a fictional character or understand escapism…

Anonymous 45994

images (1).jpeg

Should I call out a 40yo dude who tried grooming me years ago and his now 20yo e-thot [who possibly might've been groomed too] on their instagram?
I have so much shit to say, is it really worth it?

help.

Anonymous 45995

>>45994
Yes, very. Make a throwaway account if you must. Your words might help her too.

Anonymous 45996

>>45995
Thank you, anona. I'll do it.
I felt repulsed and I know he'll suck her dry. They'll both hate me for that, but I must do it.
I had plenty of women giving me tough love and slapping my face to reality when it was my turn, so I must do it.

I'll think about what to say and how to say it.

Anonymous 45997

>>45994
Yes ruin his relationship he is a 40 yo moid he is disgusting.

Anonymous 46010

>>45351
Anon you shouldn't body shame people that isn't nice

Anonymous 46014

>>45994
Moids are so fucking disgusting. It actually breaks my heart that there are SO many women who fall for the empty shit they say and their promises, but especially older guys who prey on impressionable girls. Every single fucking one wants to date a girl fresh out of high school, no matter how old he gets. And most older men actually support him for it, thinking manipulating young women makes him cooler. Even those that don’t find some way to victimize the WOMAN because “she wants his money” or some stupid shit like that. Moids ACTUALLY have no ability to relate to women emotionally. It’s just not within their limited ranges of empathy.

Anyway, I’m about to take a comfy nap after another uneventful day… I hope everyone is holding up okay. Much love.

Anonymous 46019

>>46014
Exactly, anona
It's depressing. Men aren't capable of humanity, and if we think they are we are just projecting our owm values onto them.

I remember that piece of shit saying he "gets along" better with younger women, that women age like milk, that women his age were gold diggers, etc. He drives a 2010 Honda, is a raging alcoholic, drug addict, had many unsuccessful relationships but somehow has the NERVE to say that.

I'm ace, I just somehow thought he could be my friend, but he wanted to manipulate me to get into my pants, and discard me like trash. I'm so glad I wasn't in a position to afford meeting that predator irl.

Right now she's falling for the same stuff he said and done to me, god knows how it'll end up.
The least I could do is let her know.

Have a nice rest ❤️

Anonymous 46024

>>45887
Yeah. I think it’s like this. It’s just so unbelievably disappointing. Idk if I’ll be able to get over it either way.

Anonymous 46026

angel hamtaro.gif

My stupid eating disorder is getting worse and I promised my friends I'd start maintaining but now that I did it today I want to fast really bad tomorrow. kms

Anonymous 46041

>>45885
There is a video game thread game in /media/ you know. This isn't really a vent.
I really do have to finish watching that LP I was.

Anonymous 46052

1603865644017.jpeg

I just gifted a guy 25 euro steam gift card (which was kind of a lot for me, I'm a student n I have to pay for rent) because I wanted him to continue talking to me, but I only got made fun of as a response. I feel like such a loser. I wonder if any guy on this Earth would be capable of tolerating me.

Anonymous 46053

>>46052
You paid 25 euros to find to find out whether he was a good guy or not. He’s a jerk. Any kind person would appreciate someone who would do this.

Anonymous 46054

>>46053
But if every guy reacts to me like that, then maybe I'm the faulty one, not them.

Anonymous 46055

>>46052
Chargeback the payment for the gift card. His Steam account will likely get locked for carding or he'll get a trade ban, lmao. He might not even be able to fix it through support. Fuck that moid.

>>46054
Oh, it's very possible that all men are shitty. Don't blame yourself.

Anonymous 46057

>>46052
Jfc who gave men so much audacity, good thing his true colors shows this early on so you can escape. You are worth much more than this, he is not worth your time!

Anonymous 46058

>>46052

He's a dick for making fun of you but you also can't expect to buy someone's friendship with a gift card. If you guys were drifting apart then a giftcard wouldn't really change that.

Anonymous 46059

tumblr_78699f83919…

i'm turning 20 tomorrow and it doesn't feel good. i'm actually scared of that. i still feel like i'm just 17 or 18, time flies so fast and i don't have any memorable moments in all my teenage years, my teenage years are like an empty room, and boom, now i'm about to turn 20. Being an adult is so hard and i'm scared

Anonymous 46060

>>46059
I'm 28 and I turn 29 in less than half a year.
If it makes you feel better, everyone (and I mean everyone) I know in their twenties (and even into their thirties) feels like you do. Hell, I know a man in his 50's and he still feels like he's 30 sometimes. It's so, so normal to be feeling like you do.
And don't worry about not having any awesome memories from your teenage years. Think about how much control you had (or, rather, how much you didn't have) in your teens: you had to live somewhere without any real say in it, you had no control over what school you went to or who you were exposed to, and if you wanted to go anywhere I'm assuming you had to get permission in some fashion. But when you're an adult (or moved out, whatever) it's different. You have more opportunities to make those badass memories in your twenties because you have more control over things.
And yeah, being an adult is fucking scary. I'm scared, you're scared, everyone I know is scared. But after a few years of living out on your own (and realizing who you really are and what you want in life) it starts to become a lot more clear. By the time you're 25 you'll have been through so fucking much in your life that you'll be able to say "Sheeeit, been there done that. What's next?"

Anonymous 46062

>>46060
different anon but i turn 20 in a couple of months so thank you for this.

Anonymous 46063

>>46060
Thank you so much for this, anon. I feel better now, me turning 20 tomorrow doesn’t feel that weird and scary anymore

Anonymous 46068

blearily realizing that i only adopt an actively terfy mindset when going through a rough patch mentally, it's like hating on troons over anonymous image boards helps me cope with things. i know this is wrong, but i don't know how to stop lol (and it really feels so harmless. i know i'd never externally make a trans person feel bad irl because i have self control/home training)

Anonymous 46081

>>46068
day to day troons are mostly harmless and just trying to live with their mental illness. it's the ones that want to change laws, biology, and speech you have to look out for.

Anonymous 46094

>>46068
That's normal. I hate troons and a lot of other people but I wouldn't be rude to them irl because I'm a normal person. Normal well adjusted humans will act polite until you are rude to them in their face. I will treat the troon how he treats me, albeit with some distance so they don't try to befriend me.

Anonymous 46101

>>46019
What's wrong with driving a 2010 Honda?

Anonymous 46129

>>46101
Nothing but it's not something amazing either.

Anonymous 46132

>>46101
nothing, but don't think you're hot shit that women are dying to get with because of you and your 10 year old economy vehicle

Anonymous 46133

>>46101
men = wallets, so he's a pretty shitty wallet

Anonymous 46146

My moid just admitted to kissing another woman last night. Infidelity should be punishable by death.

Anonymous 46147

>>46146
what are you going to do about it? how long have you been together?

Anonymous 46149

>>46147
We've only been dating a few months. Pretty sure I'm going to just leave him. If he can't control himself, he'll end up fucking someone else in another few months.

Anonymous 46150

Well..
Unless my father fucks off by tomorrow before noon, not only is the rest of Monstertober cancelled but this is gonna be the worst bday ever.

Anonymous 46156

How do I stop valuing myself based on what others think of me? I have no self-esteem and when someone says some joke on my expense I go into complete ddepression mode.

Anonymous 46157

>>46156
Avoid other people.

Anonymous 46160

>>46149
yeah good call, don't waste your time with cheaters

Anonymous 46161

My boyfriend facefucked me in a certain position, a position very similar to another position I was facefucked raped in, and I feel so broken. I had told him about that specific time I'd been raped, too, so this wouldn't happen, but I guess I wasn't explicit enough.

He says he thought I didn't resist and liked it, but I couldn't do anything in that position to indicate the opposite. I feel like it might have been an honest mistake, but I'm really unhappy he forgot about what I told him about that specific time I was raped. He claims all the time he has terrible memory and that's why he forgets details of my life, but I'd explained that multiple times…

I feel miserable because I have made a post before about how I accidentally slapped him and he acted like it was the worst thing ever. I likened it to that and he said the slapping was worse because anyone would think that's bad and what he did, not necessarily. But he pulled me into the position and it was so fast I could not get out of it, and when he started facefucking me he was so deep in I couldn't get my head out or move my head at all. I just want to cry. I'm so weak.

Anonymous 46162

>>46161
You weren't explicit enough? Sis, are you sure he didn't just ignore you?

Anonymous 46164

>>46161
I’m so so sorry anon. I’m so sorry. He doesn’t deserve you. I feel like he’s lying to save himself.

You deserve so much better. Someone who respects you and your boundaries and not some gross, selfish sex. He is disrespectful and did not even listen. I’m so sorry. Please let us know what you will do next. Please break up with him, but please seek someone who will protect you if that happens. <3333

Anonymous 46165

>>46161
Fuck him and his excuses. He is in the wrong and insensitive. Whining about some slap and yet disrespects you. Anon you deserve better.

Anonymous 46166

ec.jpg

>>46161
anon please. This sort of stuff doesn't happen in a caring relationship, why put up with someone whose memory is so poor wahh wahh that he can't even keep you safe from one of the worst things that ever happened to you? Do you think this guy sees you as a person if he can't even remember a detail like that?

Anonymous 46167

>>46161
>He says he thought I didn't resist and liked it, but I couldn't do anything in that position to indicate the opposite.
As much as it's his fault too, together you should have both agreed on a pre-decided safe-signal to tell him to stop. Could be snapping fingers or a "one-two-three" grunts that signal you want whatever is happening to stop. If you're going to bother getting kinky you should bother doing it right.

Anonymous 46168

>>46167
No victim blaming anon

Anonymous 46169

>>46168
I'm blaming both of them not the victim. She states she was unable to tell him to stop, if she had discussed the topic of kinky sex beforehand, both parties should have had a safeword pre-decided, and if they planned to do kinky acts that limit speech, safe-signals pre-decided. If both of them failed to agree on this or bring this up beforehand, they both failed their responsibility to the other person.

Now, if she didn't expect to have kinky sex, if this was just forced on her with no warning or discussing the matter beforehand, then we're bordering on rape here, and the issue isn't that she couldn't communicate she didn't like it, but that he would have kept going anyway. That is an entirely different discussion. I suppose we can just ask her.

>>46161
Did you ever have a discussion of the possibility of kinky sex, or did he just one day, out of the blue, grab you and start facefucking you with no warning?

Anonymous 46171

>>45858
It's too late, should have stopped doing it during high-school, now I'm just fucked. Can't help myself, let alone other people. Thank you though, it's kind of nice and a bit embarrassing to be so encouraged by a complete stranger.
>>45863
It's partially because of the University cost too, not from America and things work differently here. You can't enter the 2nd or any other year of University until you pay off the previous year, student debt does not exist and no matter what job I got it would have been impossible to pay it off on my own. It's too late, finished a different Uni that I'm okay with and that's that. I'll find a job doing god knows what and try and get my shit together. Thank you for the advice regardless, hopefully you're in a much better state.

Anonymous 46172

>>46171
>It's too late, should have stopped doing it during high-school, now I'm just fucked. Can't help myself, let alone other people. Thank you though, it's kind of nice and a bit embarrassing to be so encouraged by a complete stranger.
It's only too late when you're dead, at any point before then, you can make any choices you wish. Don't confuse this for thinking you get to choose the opportunities for you to make choices though.

Anonymous 46173

>>46150
Eh nevermind, just drank 3 bottles of glass coffee and just made myself an extra cup of one.
It's a wild world, as Cat Stevens put it, I'm just adapting to it.

Anonymous 46178

>>46169
Unless her bf is a major austist, it's not that hard to know when someone is not into something

Anonymous 46179

Just dumped my boyfriend, the guy I considered the love of my life and soulmate, because I found a bunch of posts he wrote from a while back fawning over underage girls and talking about 13-14 year olds are prime. Were both 25. I’ve been crying non stop. This guy was literally perfect in every other way, and I feel like I’ve made a huge mistake, but I can’t be in a relationship with a hebephile. I just can’t. Its an exercise in futility. Now I feel like I’ve been blackpilled on men. All of them are creeps. Literally all of them. Did I do the right thing? I couldn’t see a future anymore, not with a hebe.

Anonymous 46180

>>46161
Be careful with guys who want to hurt you and humiliate you during sex. They’re all narcissists. Any guy will tell you, when he loves and respects a woman, he doesn’t wanna hurt them. Get out of there. He doesn’t love you.

Anonymous 46182

>>46179
You absolutely did the right thing, anona; And I admire you for that. Many women not only stay, but enable it for their entire lives. When you stand up for yourself, you stand up for many other, Angelou said.

Allow yourself to cry, to be hurt but please stay sure of that, all of them are pedophiles, degenerated demons, predators of the highest caliber. I'm so sorry the truth were shown to you in a terrible way. Welcome to the blackpill.

You come stronger out of this now. Best wishes.

Anonymous 46183

>>46169
I don’t know why anyone would do that position
/act if she expressed she had a bad past with it. He’s being blind and inconsiderate. It’s a good thing to reinforce boundaries and safe signals. This dude is awful though.

Anonymous 46186

>>46169
>>46184
Moids fuck off pls

Anonymous 46187

>>46161
>how I accidentally slapped him and he acted like it was the worst thing ever
Oh honey, you should have strangled him instead :)

Anonymous 46188

IMG_1012.png

>>46184
die moid

Anonymous 46191

e1ba9b9.jpg

>>46169
>>46166
>>46162
There was no way for me to express anything. So I can see how he might not have realized I didn't want to do it. Once before he did something I didn't want to do, but he stopped because the position allowed me to try to get out of it. However, what is unfair to me is that he just slid me underneath him near the edge of the bed and then he facefucked me upside down with his penis totally down my throat. My head was hanging off the edge of the bed so it was like I was stuck and couldn't do anything. Maybe he perceived the fact I was gagging as evidence I liked it? Anyway, my point is, I think he wouldn't have ignored me if he knew.

What hurts me is how I felt like he treated my body like a sex doll, with no regard for my past (I was facefucked upside down except then the guy was holding me upside down in the air, so it was very similar) and in terms of how he just moved me around.

That's the thing I don't like about men, they don't realize their own strength. He's been with chunkier girls in the past so maybe he's not used to someone he can just move around. I can't resist because I'm too weak.

>>46164
>>46165
>>46166
You're very sweet anons, but I want to try to make things work. I'm going to talk to him again about it tomorrow or the day after. If it happens again, that's my limit. It is true I've tried telling him he needs to tell me if he's trying something new because I'm very anxious about what the other person will do to me in a sex act, and I've told him about my past (which includes more assault, but the facefucking one I mentioned was probably my least favorite one because it was the last straw for me with my ex).

I hate to sound so weak. But he's been very caring and respectful in other ways, so I want to believe this is a mistake.

>>46167
>>46169
I've told him before if he wants to try anything new he should tell me what it is. He did not tell me. I also asked what he was doing when he pulled me towards him because I couldn't get out of it and he didn't answer (and I've told him I specifically don't like it when I ask him during sex what is going to happen, or what is he about to do, and he doesn't answer).

I told him after that if he had wanted to do this, he should have told me and I'm sure I'd have been willing to try and figure out boundaries. He didn't, though.

>>46180
I don't think he actually likes seeing pain, but he couldn't see my face in that position. He's said that he doesn't like pain from my end during sex. Usually he gets anxious if he feels like I'm in pain. That's why I feel like a wuss. I still don't think his logic was sound, like it disappoints me he doesn't get how vulnerable I am when I have sex with him or any man for that matter because of the strength difference and such.

>>46187
Lmao anon, I feel like a piece of shit because after the time I accidentally slapped him, I secretly like the idea of that in a sexual context. But ironically I feel too guilty because I hate the idea of him being in pain to ever bring it up.


Overall, thank you anons, you've given me a lot to think about. I thought, maybe I still am, but I thought I was being a bitch because I'm not over this and it happened a couple weeks ago.

Anonymous 46197

What they're doing to Corbyn is such bullshit

Anonymous 46198

>>46172
I'm gonna have to keep trying I guess. The only thing I've got left really. Thank you very much for the advice sis, you're too kind.

Anonymous 46201

>>46191
Go domme. I did and I never looked back.

Anonymous 46202

>>46191
Please just dump him already. You deserve better. It's just going to happen again. Find someone who is nice 100% of the time.

Anonymous 46205

>>46060
>By the time you're 25 you'll have been through so fucking much in your life that you'll be able to say "Sheeeit, been there done that. What's next?"
I turned 25 this summer and I still have no big memories and feel like I've accomplished nothing.

Anonymous 46208

>>46191
>I've told him before if he wants to try anything new he should tell me what it is. He did not tell me. I also asked what he was doing when he pulled me towards him because I couldn't get out of it and he didn't answer (and I've told him I specifically don't like it when I ask him during sex what is going to happen, or what is he about to do, and he doesn't answer).

>I told him after that if he had wanted to do this, he should have told me and I'm sure I'd have been willing to try and figure out boundaries. He didn't, though.


Alright then, now that I have more information, let me state what I think. I think that if this is the first time this has happened, I mean the very first time, nothing like this has happened before, you forgive him if you can. He may be a dumb fucking animal, but that doesn't mean he's an evil fucking animal. He could have genuinely fucked up, not thought about what he was doing, and sincerely regret what he did. It sounds like you agree with the statement here.
>That's the thing I don't like about men, they don't realize their own strength. He's been with chunkier girls in the past so maybe he's not used to someone he can just move around. I can't resist because I'm too weak.
And so, everyone gets one. if however this is not the first time. Fuck him, he's either genuinely too stupid to improve his behavior or inherently malicious. It doesn't matter which, because either way he is going to fucking destroy you and your emotional state with this type of behavior. One event is not enough to make this decision, so if this is the first, forgive him if you can, however, if you do decide you can and will forgive him, this is what I have to say how to prevent this from ever happening again.

This
>I've told him before if he wants to try anything new he should tell me what it is. He did not tell me.
is a great thing, it's wonderful that you want to discuss things beforehand. Communication is great. This is still not a replacement for a safeword system. Love is passionate, moids are dumb, and this system can and will fail if you encounter this situation again if you don't correct it. This works only if the moid thinks about what he wants to do before he does it, he can't surprise you or do something odd and unexpected that turns out wonderful. The only way to ensure spur of the moment actions do not happen like this again, is the use of safewords. You need to decide on a predetermined safeword, and a predetermined safesignal. Both. He will never, ever be able to use the excuse of "well I didn't know you didn't like it" ever again if you force him to agree with this. I don't care what the signal is. For an example, my safeword is "Tax Exemptions" and my safe signal for when my mouth is occupied is three, slow, forceful slaps. On him or another object. When I use either of these, he fucking stops, because if he doesn't stop, that means he doesn't care, and if he doesn't care, he is an evil asshole that doesn't respect me and I want nothing to fucking do with him. This has never failed yet.

>I told him after that if he had wanted to do this, he should have told me and I'm sure I'd have been willing to try and figure out boundaries. He didn't, though.

Again, this is great, this is a good thing to say because talking things out can make even the most kinkiest ideas way safer by expressing what you may find unpleasent, what he might, and so on. However, this still isn't a complete replacement for a safeword or safesignal. A safeword and a safesignal sates clearly to your partner "I do not like what is happening, I am not feeling good, I want all of this to stop right now, or you are raping me." A safeword and a safesignal is your best friend, because it puts you in control of the sex, even if he's the one acting on you. You are always the one that gets to say "Stop, I don't like this anymore." No matter how spontaneous the act is.

If the moid is a good person, he will feel really fucking bad for abusing you. Not as much as being abused, they're simply not the same, but most people do not want to feel like evil assholes. Feeling like an evil asshole is awful if you're not an evil asshole. It is both of your responsibilities to be 100% honest with each other so no weedling "I didn't know you didn't like it" bullshit can occur.

Again, I do not want to say you shouldn't feel scared or hurt right now. Both you failed each other in this regards, you both failed to respect your partner enough to set explicit boundaries and how to tell the other partner about explicit boundaries at a moment's notice. I know you're feeling scared, weak and hurt now. I hope if he's a good person that he's feeling like an asshole that really fucked up, but I don't know. If you both love and appreciate each other, and want to prevent this from ever, ever happening again. This is the only way to make sure no confusion occurs.

Anonymous 46209

>>46178
You say this, but as someone who has roleplayed very kinky rape scenarios and other things, that line gets really fucking blurry really fucking quick. Furthermore, using safewords put all the power on the sub at all times, because any person who doesn't respect a safeword is an evil manipulative asshole.

I've gagged and choked on my boyfriend's cock while he facefucked me. That doesn't mean I didn't like it, it means I was gagging and choking.

>>46183
>I don’t know why anyone would do that position /act if she expressed she had a bad past with it.
If he's stupid he may have genuinely not remembered, now, that brings in other problems of "well then he's a dumb asshole" and that I agree, but that's not the point I'm making. The point I'm making is that you can't tell if he's dumb or evil if you don't set up safewords beforehand. Dumb people can be genuinely good and mean no harm, and still do stupid things that hurt you. That doesn't make them evil, it makes them stupid, and the only way to make sure both parties are aware of whether or not the other person is stupid is through safewords.

I am assuming that he is not evil, just stupid, for the sake of this discussion.

>>46186
Np, you fuck off moid. There's a way to have healthy sex and everyone should know how to fucking have it. No matter what you think about women's wants.

Anonymous 46213

d.gif

I wish I didn't take my first semester of uni this year. I wish I took a break this year, because online school truly sucks. There's no social aspect of college and I feel like my grades are slipping because I'm feeling ostracized and depressed. I've talked to teachers about this, and for the classes that I'm not doing so hot in will be reset thankfully so I'm not worried about that anymore.

It's hard enough struggling with social anxiety. Online friends don't fill the void, and usually end up in ghosting. I develop "friend crushes" on people all the time, but at the end of the day, I usually just fantasize about being friends with someone rather than taking the initiative. I just wish some cool extrovert girl would pick me to be her pocket introvert.

Anonymous 46246

>>46191
Please anon, you deserve so much better. I understand wanting to talk it through, but sometimes I just don’t trust the idea that communication will solve everything. I feel that he is very disrespectful and forcing you to such a postition… I don’t like how he didn’t talk back to you and what he was doing. And an excuse of not remembering. Please see it through what you want. I promise you deserve the best .

Anonymous 46255

Finally broke off my weird pseudo relationship with that man. It's been a week, but I'm still extremely effected by it. I have exams to worry about and all I think about is all the shit he put me through. I wish I could get all that time back. Some examples of his behavior: Breaking up a marriage for fun, starting short term intense relationships with people only to cut them off and tell them they meant nothing to him. Public humiliation if I did so much as talk about a personal interest too much. This is the tip of the iceberg of course.
I want those years of my life back. I'm so behind my peers cause he made all of my life choices for me (they had to be "approved" by him), including my choice in major. I don't know where to go from here. Damn. Just damn.

Anonymous 46258

>>46255
You escaped a narc. Take some time (months) to figure out who you are and what you want. Don’t be afraid to start over from scratch.

Anonymous 46260

>>46191
You told him you were raped in that position. And that wasn’t memorable enough for him? Why do you think you talking about your feelings is going to make a difference. He just doesn’t care.

Anonymous 46261

>>46209
You need therapy.

Anonymous 46262

I just moved out into a place with 4 random roomates in a city 2 hours away. I found a job here within a couple weeks delivering pizzas and was doing that along with my other job that was back in the city I moved from. The pizza job I quit because I broke my phone delivering and didn't want to follow paper directions and the other job I quit because it seemed pointless because of the distance. I haven't had any luck finding anything else and I'm sick of working. I cammed for it bit but it's so unmotivating on the slow days and I hate selling my body for money. I keep getting in relationships with people and end up being so overbearing they lose interest. I'm still hung up on one guy that wants nothing to do with me. Latley I've been considering going back to the living situation with my mom but the environment was so hostile and I felt unsafe. I have lost so much motivation and contemplate suicide daily but I'm too much of a coward I guess. So instead I engage in reckless behavior. I know the simple solution is just to develop skills and hobbies but I really have no interest. I'm hoping I get hired soon so I'm not forced to live in my car. I just want someone to take care of me and tell me it will all be okay.

Anonymous 46264

>>46213
I relate to this so hard. I'm a transfer from a community college to go to Uni for my junior year. I moved to a new place and everything.
So far it hasn't been that bad; my school is handling COVID surprisingly well and some classes are still in person (most are online tho) and it's been really hard keeping my moral up. I have literally zero friends here.

Anonymous 46277

My mom is so fucking annoying. She told my sister a "friend" mistook my sister for her in a photograph(lie). What the fuck? My sister is in her twenties. My mom is 53 and looks 63.
Why would she insult my sister like that?
(to top it all off, my sister looks nothing like my mom. Maybe if she wanted to make it believable she could pick a daughter that even kind of looks like her.)
She's probably just being manic again but fuck if I am not fed up.

Anonymous 46279

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK I CANT LIVE LIKE THIS ANYMORE IM SO FUCKIGN TIRED I AM TIRED OF THIS CYCLE I WANT TO FUCKING DIE PLEASE END THIS FOR ME ALREADY

Anonymous 46280

I still cant talk to anyone whenever im le sad coping despite having friends and a supportive loving boyfriend. Why am I like this fucking ree pls end this for me Im so tired ||help||

Anonymous 46282

tales of gay.png

>>46280
chemical imbalance perhaps?

Anonymous 46283

>>46282
what do you suggest I should do anon? Please help me Im so desperate I dont want to be like this anymore

Anonymous 46285

>>46283
perhaps talk to your bf/friends about this, its possible therapy and professional consoling may help

Anonymous 46286

>>45630
look all i'll say is my dad really wanted kids and mum didn't at all, and now i am fucked up 30 years later.

Anonymous 46289

A few months ago I had a dream where I attended a screening of the Hilda movie, when this German guy told me to give him my money, so I spat in his face. He seemed ok with it, albeit dissapointed nonetheless.

Then I told him "Du bist bluhrd", to which he started chasing me in the theater, around the seats, to the point I jumped over them at some point.

Twas odd.

Anonymous 46290

I don't know how to pay my rent. My boyfriend keeps harassing me for the rent. I've been begging my family to cover for me the last two months but I can't for he third month. My boyfriend doesn't cover my portion of he rent because he feels it would encourage my "laziness." I go to interviews but I get no call back. My unemployment is delayed because of covid. He stressing about it and I don't know what to do. I don't know how to cover for November. I don't think I can beg anymore.

Anonymous 46293

>>45630
If you don't want children, and he doesn't know this, yes, you are fundamentally incompatible because you refuse to be honest with him. Granted, you do this because you are scared of abandonment, but if you wanted a relationship with zero children, honesty is the only way to go about it. That way he can actually find someone that has similar goals to his wants, and you can find yours.

Anonymous 46298

>>46290
Talk to your landlord and ask if you can delay payment. Then break-up with your bf. He shouldn't be harassing you or calling you lazy. Move back in with your parents and look for a job teaching English online or something similar until you can get a proper job. If you owe any money by moving out, ask your parents to cover it then pay them back with your first paycheck.

Anonymous 46299

>>46279
What's wrong anon?

Anonymous 46301

>>46290
your boyfriend is an asshole. what a fucking douchebag.

Anonymous 46302

>>46290
I know you won't break up with this abusive asshole but I hope that you at least realize he is abusive. People who supposedly are in a loving relationship will want to help each other in times of need, specially in the middle of a pandemic. Not wanting to contribute to your "laziness" is a shitty excuse. Chances are he stopped giving a shit about you and doesn't want to spend any of his money on you anymore because he's about to break up with you in any moment. Honestly a person who loves you will not torture you like this. This is not normal.

Anonymous 46304

>>46277
I don't think she was trying to insult her, it's probably more like trying to compete with her. Some women feel the need to constantly compete with their children. My 82 year old wrinkly grandmother does it with my mom too. My mom looks a lot younger than she is and is always getting attention from guys, so my grandma lies and says people call her beautiful and tell her that she looks so young. She makes negative comments about my mom and her sisters' appearance too (e.g you look ugly today, something about you looks bad, did you change something because you look ugly, your sisters look old, etc). Your mom just can't deal with being old and is coping hard to make herself feel better.

Anonymous 46307

>>46302
you don't know their relationship though, she could easily be dragging him along for ages with this being his idea of stopping it. regardless it does sound like they should break up because one or the other is not being honest at all.

Anonymous 46308

>>46299
I also dont know tbh. I am filled with dread and negative emotions for no reason (at the moment at least). I get this once a week. Of course I would answer with a lot of reasons if someone asks me why my life is a misery. I am too stressed to talk to friends and boyfriend. I can't hold proper conversations

Anonymous 46309

>>46298
>look for a job teaching English online
Don't you need at least some kind of degree for that? A teaching degree or an English degree?

Anonymous 46311

1571728616286.gif

Every time I wake up it feels like I'm falling through a sheet of ice.

Anonymous 46315

>>46309
Casual research says it at least requires a Bachelor's in anything, not necessarily in English or Teaching.

Anonymous 46320

>>46309
I think you can teach on italki and cambly without any qualifications. Some people just want a native speaker to talk with.

Anonymous 46325

>>46311
the person who did this to this latte kitten is a sociopath

Anonymous 46326

>>46325
What should they have done instead? Slowly drank it up?

Anonymous 46328

>>46326
yes, that'd be preferable. look at the way they're taking pleasure in lifting up its face, it's not right

Anonymous 46353

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A friend I was crushing on for years ever since middle-school moved abroad a year ago and I miss him so much. I wish I could tell him how I feel about him, but I doubt he would feel the same, especially since he is from a rich snobby family. No guy I have met since he left felt as good as him and I just feel angrty at myself for not having done anything sooner

Anonymous 46357

__kirisame_marisa_…

I was getting interviews for jobs, and then the second lockdown happened.

Sufficite it to say my professional life is now fucked forever.

Anonymous 46366

I hate being alive and how even though I don't try to I can track shit I wish I didn't notice. Oh, my boyfriend sleeps with his phone ever since we switched sides instead of charging said phone? He must be covering something up, my brain tells me. But I know that in of itself is inconclusive. I hear moids talk shit about women in my day-to-day life, but I am supposed to also ram it in men aren't really like that. Everything I perceive's fucking fake.

Anonymous 46369

>>46366
how is what you perceive fake? maybe he really is hiding something. almost all of them are. they are literally raised to be duplicitous and disrespectful.

Anonymous 46371

>>46369
Please donate your brain to scientific research once you're dead.

Anonymous 46374

>>46371
being willfully ignorant about male conditioning doesn't change reality. either you want to fight to get played or you have a vested interest in pretending this doesn't exist for your own benefit as a sackwielder

Anonymous 46375

>>46369
>they are literally raised to be duplicitous and disrespectful
By who?

Anonymous 46379

>>46375
by male socialization and toxic masculinity. nice "own" i guess?

Anonymous 46384

>>46379
I definitely think men are raised to be emotionally stunted and with a lot of unconscious biases, but I don't really get this "duplicity" thing.

Anonymous 46385

9F92AF5C-26D2-4BB4…

I really do think my bf is beautiful. He has big blue eyes and an amazing smile. But ever since quarantine, his hair has grown past his shoulders and he has an unkempt beard. These are both things I fine extremely unattractive and I still see the cute in him but he is honestly starting to look hobo-ish and it’s really putting me off. I keep trying to make gentle nudges and I’ve told him I don’t find the hair attractive but he won’t do anything. I take care of my appearance and I just wish he would do the same. I don’t want to be controlling but the long hair and beard are honestly grotesque to me.

Anonymous 46386

>>46385
Deny him coochie

Anonymous 46387

>>46385
Long hair can be nice, but unkempt beards? Never. I'm sorry for your loss, Anon.

Anonymous 46389

>>46385
Just fucking tell him, it's not a bad thing. My bf was also growing out his hair during quarantine and I would outright tell him I didn't like it and to cut it. Just don't be mean about it.

Anonymous 46395

>>46384
they're great at compartmentalizing and betraying women while lying to their faces and pretending to be entirely different people while betraying their wives and girlfriends in every sense. family annihilators give absolutely no hints, often, that they hate their wives and families and have entirely different lives and you never know it until you're being strangled by your resentful and secretly psychotic husband

Anonymous 46405

>>46389
He won’t listen fml, beards and long hair are literally the epitome of what i find unattractive.

Anonymous 46406

>>46405
Once they go NEET like that the kindest thing to do is put them down :/

Anonymous 46408

>>46405
It's time to shave your own head.
I think a good idea would be to point out beards and long hair in famous men. For example, comment how you think pewdiepie looks much better without the beard, or that the guy who does Thor looks better with short hair, etc. Might be too subtle for the male brain but you can try.

Anonymous 46411

9F4326D1-F2B7-4F35…

I hate my life. I’m constantly either stressed, exhausted, bored, indifferent, or deeply depressed. I haven’t had a hobby in over 2 years because nothing fucking makes me happy anymore. Sometimes I look at cute cottagecore things like picrel and dream that I am living a happy life in nature, but I think that even if i had a dream life like that, i’d still be miserable. I dont see myself ever being happy. My chest feels so heavy. I just want to feel happiness or enjoyment but i cant. I feel so numb and hopeless. Whats the fucking point

Anonymous 46412

My father is abusive

Anonymous 46413

>>46412
Cut him out your life anon.

Anonymous 46422

i miss him and dont want to accept the idea that i might not ever see him again

Anonymous 46427

Just heard that my dad who molested me and I haven't seen in 20 years is dead… Don't know what to think. I'd pretty much forgotten about him and now I'm going with my brothers to his apartment tomorrow to try and figure out if he had a will and everything… Didn't think it would happen this soon.

Anonymous 46430

I wish I grew up eating fresh vegetables and water. Learning to eat right when you get older is such a chore, especially when you grew up with fast food and the American Public Schools dietary education.

Anonymous 46431

lmao.PNG

/pol/ melting down right now is just delicious

https://twitter.com/mothistopheles/status/1324037003428667392

Anonymous 46433

>>46430
Lol my home ec "class" in elementary school was essentially "you can put frozen veggies and cut up hot dogs on instant ramen for more nutrition!" which is sadly better than a lot of other schools.

Anonymous 46434

I have to cut off my mother for stealing my life and using me as her emotional support growing up and into adult hood. I was never able to form relationships because of her and never able to meet anyone because I was stuck in the nigger ghetto. She denies it is her fault and pretends I'm crazy. I have to cut her off.

Anonymous 46435

>>46414
It's possible that he has some kind of dysmorphia or something regarding his face, and will literally never be happy with it unless he gets therapy or something.

Anonymous 46439

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Anonymous 46440

IMG_20201105_15081…

>>46439
Seethe harder, friend

Anonymous 46442

Real shit, amerifat here and this election fuckery is getting to me. My normie Facebook friends are all pissy because Biden didn’t win by a landslide and all my online larp (m*le) friends are ready to boogaloo over Trump lagging behind him. I want to shake these fuckers and say “Presidents don’t even have the power to make laws, he only can approve what congress passes, our daily lives will not change no matter the outcome, local representatives are way more important in regards to what happens in our daily lives” but they keep going on about it. I wish people would just get it together and count the damn ballots so everyone would shut the fuck up and move on with their lives.

Anonymous 46444

Max Headroom.webm

>>46442
This, but in reality the game is rigged. Burger politics is a staged theatre for normalfags who believe that their votes matter and that the US president has a lot of power and is not just another puppet handpicked by the deepstate for entertainment.
People with real power are always unknown.

Anonymous 46445

>>46441
I am not a tranny and I am not larping.

Anonymous 46447

I'm accepting my relationship will look different than what I wanted it to be like, and it's hard because I was so close in other relationships to achieving that, but they weren't with a person who made me feel a certain way. Now I'm with a person who makes me feel a certain way, but I've realized our relationship will not be collaborative, close, etcetera. in the way I want it. It'll be a boring ass life partner relationship where I fuck him a lot because I'm horny, but I'll never truly passionate because he's too scared to be vulnerable and in general he doesn't appreciate vulnerability. I feel like he wants a basic hus/wife relationship but I want a best friend and confidant relationship. I'm stupid for ever thinking things might jump my way

Anonymous 46448

>>46447
I wish I could be in a relationship with a woman, but I feel like I, as horny as I am, would scare that development off. Everyone tells me how lesbians and bisexuals don't like sex. I need sex like, 3-4 times a day, and I don't watch porn so it is already a lot for the males I've been with who don't reach that amount.

Anonymous 46449

>>46448
Gay coomers exist anon, I promise.

Anonymous 46452

smad.

Anonymous 46453

is there anything worse than listening to rich kids complain about having to attend university while you're wanting to attend but deathly afraid of somehow, against all odds and luck, not being able to afford your tuition fees? is there?
i want to kill all of them

Anonymous 46455

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I'm fucking tired of moids orbiting me, there is just no way known to me to tell them to fuck off without them crying emotional rape to their social circle (which is bad because I'm in a small uni and that would affect me).

Actually the second moid I rejected never talked to me again and even deleted me on fagbook. At first I thought that was kinda rude, pretending I didn't exist anymore just because I didn't want to fuck him, but then I realized that's the best course of action a moid can take when faced with rejection. All other psychos will either keep pestering me one way or another despite knowing I won't fuck them, or get so buttblasted every person that knows him will know I'm evil because I didn't choke on his dick.

Why are moids like this? I'm a lesbian and I would never act like this towards a girl that rejected me. Sure, things get awkward if you still see her everyday and shit, but I have no reason to badmouth her because she didn't fuck me, or keep orbiting her against her will. Seriously, what the fuck do you do in these situations? I'm honestly lost.

Anonymous 46456

My bf of 3 years forgot my birthday, and while I don't really care about holidays or getting gifts and stuff, it kind of hurts my feelings that he forgot because he always remembers to give me a gift on Valentines Day/Birthday, etc, and while I don't need that. I at least wanted to hear Happy Birthday? he really enjoys extravagant gestures and stuff, so it kind of put me off that he didn't remember. sigh.

He has been complaining that I'm distant and inconsiderate (i've been depressed lately) and I wonder if it's passive aggressive/done on purpose out of spite lol. I've been wanting to break up for awhile and wonder if it's the nail in the coffin, but really, it seems silly

Anonymous 46460

>>46455
they are only nice and pretend to have the same interests so they can fuck you. when they realise this isn't going to happen they stop trying to be nice at all and find someone else to focus all their attention on.

men don't see women as human with their own thoughts and opinions. women are just things to be tricked to consenting to sex, whether it through being nice, money, or drugging. and that's only because they know rape is (supposed to be) illegal.

Anonymous 46461

>>46460
this. real talk: almost all sex with men is coercive, women just don't realize it.

Anonymous 46462

>>46455
Haven't you answered your own question? They are like this because they only want one thing out of you. You know how Jewish rabbis used to reject prospective converts three times to see if they were legit? Honestly, I suggest that if a moid ever asks you out, you first tell him no to see if he's the type that doesn't care about anything but sex.

That would be most of them. It's one thing when it's someone in your instagram DMs saying something like "fuck you whore" when you tell them you aren't going to send them nudes or don't say "fuck me please" if they say you're hot or something. I'm used to that, but some of them, whom I KNOW IN REAL LIFE, have the audacity to say the same type of shit over texts. Then, if I try to call it out, I get told I was leading him on or something like that.

You really can't win with moids. I'd like to know myself what you're supposed to do with some of them, and it's worse when they know where you live, what you're doing, and you see them every day. TL;DR: Men only value women for sex, and on top of that, they believe they're entitled to it. When you turn them down, they will often become enraged because of this entitlement, and I don't think there's anything you can do at that point. When so many men are just that far up their own asses that they get upset when someone won't let them use them, I think the only answer is just to distance yourself from them. I'd rather be considered a weird bitch that hates men than interact with these men and then have them actually do something to me if I reject them.

Anonymous 46470

>>46455
>Why are moids like this?
Biological imperative to reproduce mixed with being not as attractive or socially gifted as some other guys mixed with a pinch of self-confidence issues.
>Seriously, what the fuck do you do in these situations?
If you're at a uni you could report them for harassment if they're constantly sending you texts. If it's outside of any work or education related context, you probably need to wait until threats are issued though maybe you could go to the police if the harassment is really bad.

Anonymous 46471

85251459_p0.png

I'm a neet and my parents want me to take a McDonald's job and I have social anxiety and I can't do this shit. I don't know what to do. I need the money but I'm too bad at life to get it.

Anonymous 46472

>>46455
they're chimps. i decided to cut men off my life 2 years ago, once i got one too many "you lead me on" accusations. i still hang out with them in groups but i make sure to never get close to them. i've never been more mentally stable. i'm straight but i think it'll take a while for me to decide to date again.

Anonymous 46473

>>46472
That's the problem with men, you treat them like human beings and they think you wanna fuck them, that you're leading them on, when it's just that their standards for treating other people are fucked. It's also why so many of them treat you like trash when you reject them, because they think treating someone with the bare minimum decency is flirting and a great compliment and effort from their part.

Thankfully I can clock most guys like this easily and begin to treat them like trash so they don't mistakenly think I wanna fuck them. Also I acknowledge not all men are like this, at least from my generation a lot seem to be more used to female friendships and while they would probably fuck their female friends if given a chance, they don't annoyingly orbite them like the desperate incels.

Anonymous 46476

>>46471
Have you thought about advertising or contacting an agency to work as a cleaner? You will have minimal client interaction and can listen to music while you work. The pay is probably better than McD’s too. I know some people think this type of work is degrading but I’ve always thought it would be relaxing and satisfying. If it works well, you can also build on it to do house organisation. Other things to look into are house and pet sitting, dog walking and grooming (might need some basic qualifications for the last one).

Anonymous 46482

background.jpg

>>46455
men are genuinely so pathetic ngl, just string them along forever its what they deserve for simping over a lesbian or any woman who would not want them

Anonymous 46496

asdfsd.PNG

>be on rp forum site
>be writing a character in a government split up into three branches (he's like, a mid-ranking character. son of the king tho.)
>there's a gc on discord for this gov.
>the heads of the three branches (and the king + queen) are in it…
>…but rather than add me to that one…
>an entirely new gc is made (missing half the members) for the government.

this makes no sense to me? and it's a super pointless thing to be bothered over, i realize it will literally not matter in a year (probably) but ??? wtf. why not just add me to the first gc made. am i not allowed to be privy to the plots that may concern my character? especially since you guys have, apparently, been discussing things i've brought up to other people in private?

and it's especially weird since there are only six of us. and there's 0 sign of there being any more in the near future, so…what the hell.

it makes me worry they've been gossiping about me or something, and just don't want me to see their shit…ugh anxiety

Anonymous 46498

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I've realized that the reason I've avoided being in a relationship for so long isn't just because I hate men (though that's still partly true), but also because I have so many weird issues. When I see my friends in healthy, normal relationships I always just feel like I'd find it kind of gross if that were me? I really hate PDA and being taken care of, it just makes me feel really undignified and embarrassed. I hate it. The only types of guys I'm potentially attracted to are the unhealthy, pathetic ones who could become emotionally reliant on me and even then the ones I meet irl are too pathetic and disgusting even for me. My friends tell me that I should just shift my type to normie guys who are emotionally stable but I can't find those types attractive- it's so fucked. I can't help but think that they're so unbelievably boring and I always feel like somehow they're patronizing me. I don't even know where to begin with how to 'fix' that.

I'm guessing this probably stems from having parents who didn't love each other and tolerated each other at best. I still feel like that's a flimsy excuse, since a lot of girls probably grow up that way and are relatively fine. I wish I could stop overthinking things and just be normal. At this point I think it's easier to just stay single and celibate than to address these issues. Also men are trash so it probably wouldn't even be worth it. It usually doesn't bother me, but whenever I find myself feeling really disgusted seeing people in lovey-dovey relationships because I think it's degrading I feel ashamed because I know that's not normal and I sound like an incel.

Anonymous 46500

My boss came in to talk to me about work on my lunch break and interrupted an online game I was playing and lost. The thing that pisses me off is he could have waited 10 more minutes until my break was over. Totally killed my happy free-time buzz.

Anonymous 46501

i dont know where else to go but here right now. ive been gettng really bad dysphoria and usually one bad episode a year but yeah i feel like its hormonal and i dont want to be a guy i like being feminine but something constant is that i'll want to just get surgery to remove female organs and breasts. i want to still be a girl and dress fem and all i just have this huge sickening feeling and it makes me want to kms i hate these organs i sometimes wish there was cancer so i could remove them and people wouldn't look down on me for doing so. i dont know how to cope to not feel like this

Anonymous 46503

When I want to leave him, I remember how good he is to me sometimes and I can't. If he was mean to me all the time I would have left him long ago, but then he apologizes and I don't know what to think anymore.

Anonymous 46504

>>46501
How old are you and what don't you like about your female organs?

Anonymous 46509

>>46498
I can kinda relate, I wouldn't be comfortable with a lot of normal relationship stuff. I could never live together with someone and I don't see myself ever opening up to someone on very intimate level. I've never had deep relationships with anyone, friends or even family, so I think I just never developed that part of my personality. It's pretty fucked up to be incapable of connecting with people but if you are content with your life, it's okay. I feel the same way as I've seen so many women in my life suffer because of men, relationships seem pretty terrible to me. Being single is comfier but the lack of physical touch and intimacy kills me sometimes.

Anonymous 46510

>>46501
It sounds like you have some serious shit to work through with a professional. I'm sorry, that dysphoria sounds really awful to live with. Is it the thought of being pregnant that you don't like? Or is it the physical presence of breasts that upsets you?

Anonymous 46516

I might lose my job due to corona and the current economic situation.
This job is something I worked VERY hard for and had to give up so much for. I lived in very bad situations, worked 14 hours every day, constantly being stressed, putting a lot of stress on my relationship due to working in a different city. Now I finally got the job that enabled me to move in with my boyfriend and live a happy life. Then the second lockdown started in my country.

It's like riding a bicycle up a steep hill only to fall down when you reach the top.

Anonymous 46517

Suki Desu, Zenbu K…

Corona has killed any chance of me getting an actual paying job I hate this

Anonymous 46518

>>45247
20 pounds over a few months is great progress, if you are losing weight in a healthy way, you should be dropping about 1 pound a week. Anything more than that isn't good for your body.

Anonymous 46521

>>46501
>i sometimes wish there was cancer so i could remove them
Kek I used to think the same when I was a kid (like 7yo or so), never was shamed by anyone for my sex though, just always had those kinda dysphoric thoughts but weren't strong enough to harm my body. Puberty did make everything worse for a bit, probably hormones or whatever, but then it pretty much went back to be like before.

I think there are several people who have some degree of gender dysphoria without it ever getting so bad you want to transition, it's just there and some days it can feel stronger but overall it's not persistently strong enough to drive you to trannyism.

Anonymous 46524

124d9e383020292e58…

I'd just like to feel some love. I don't deserve any, and I don't think a creature does because it merely exists. But I'd like to feel that way.

Anonymous 46526

>>46524
>I don't think a creature does because it merely exists
When do people deserve love then?

Anonymous 46527

>>46509
Glad someone out there can relate. I think I am so uncomfortable with being vulnerable that it's prevented me from reaching or enjoying that level of emotional intimacy, but you're right the only reason this doesn't bother me too much is because men are awful anyway. Hope you're doing okay anon, I know that feel. Being single is comfy but sometimes I feel so existentially lonely.

Anonymous 46529

>>46526
They never do.

Anonymous 46531

>>46524
animals deserve love, not humans, but animals other than humans deserve love for existing, certainly

Anonymous 46544

I wish I could call you and say don't do it. But I can't, you want to go, you'll go. It hurts because you helped me grow as a person, you belittled me except you helped me..
We share something in common only just a little.
I thought I developed a crush on you, it was probably infatuation, though I came to really care about you despite it all. I'm going to fucking miss you. I love you, I love you man.

Anonymous 46559

I messaged my, only, friend and they sent a couple of messages but nothing in the few days since. I'm not heartbroken, but it's not nice. I wish I could concentrate so I could improve myself and not be so embarrassed as to find it unpleasant to talk to people. I really do like people, but I can hardly stand myself. Shame is above all the emotion that has coloured my life for as long as I can recall.

Anonymous 46575

I keep having the urge of messaging a new bf of person A, warning them about this person.

The issue is that the person A always catfishes their potentional partners onto twisting around their entire personality, showing them what they want to see and pretending to be a 'soft n fwagile' kind of person. When in reality, especially IRL this person is one huge trainwreck. They are lying about how traditional and hardworking they are while living off in parents basement, never helping with cleaning or cooking, the least thing they can do is throw their dirty underwear in laundry. Their own mother even prepares clothing for them and whatever. Acts like a complete hysterical bitch IRL, especially around other women. Stares at them as if they want to kill them. Throws tantrums all the time. Manipulates their kind mother and becomes hysterical when things dont go 'her way'. Mother is the only worker in a big house where they live, A quit a job only because they believe that they shouldn't work, even though mother's company is falling apart.

With their previous partner, they would always manipulate and bait them into commiting suicide. Would reach a level where they would even cut themselves just for an excuse to not find a job, sitting there and doing nothing. Would always bitch about their friends, act rude as fuck in their own house in front of guests while 'playing nice' only if they are scared of a person as shit and if they are not home. At one point they started beating out their own partner (well, attempting to) because of how spoiled they were. Through this day I am still hoping their ex found peace. Ex even sent of all of their things through delivery car, even gave spare money just so this person would fuck off their life.

So the problem is that… I really want to anonymously message their current partner, gently warning them that this person is not what they seem. Of course I know the A's reaction, they would always victimize themselves with which I would remind and start throwing tantrums, but the partner they chose this time is a university virgin kid who is 5 years younger than them. I still worry for him, because no one deserves abuse.

Should I write him?

Anonymous 46577

>>46575
if she's really that bad, i would. but then again, whenever i've warned people about someone's abusive behavior i have been treated by the person i've tried to warn like i'm dramamongering crazy for trying to warn them. it's a shame that you can't issue warnings without people necessarily assuming your motivations are malicious.

Anonymous 46587

>>46575
Yes, but you risk coming across as the crazy ex. If you have some proof include that.

Anonymous 46589

1576302818374.jpeg

Sorry if it's long but I really need to complain about a lot of things at once, they're all linked. I'm sick of my life going nowhere and having to deal with bad things since birth, and everytime I make progress and can escape my shitty circumstances something completely out of my control ruins everything with a timing straight out of one of these depressing sitcoms like Malcolm in the middle or Everybody hates Chris.

I planned to stay this whole year in Japan with a working holiday visa, it's been something I careful planned for a long time but covid ruined everything and I had to come back to my family's home after six months of stay and after not getting the job I would have gotten if not for so many companies closing because of the emergency state. And even then, I was supposed to go in 2019 but I couldn't graduate on time because nobody wanted to hire me for a mandatory internship so I had to be enrolled again just for my very last semester. After I finally got an internship it was in such a shitty team that after 2 months of internship I was told by the crazy as fuck manager they won't keep me because hiring me as an actual employee would be too expensive, I even had to recruit the intern who had to replace me. And the girl I hired right before leaving was super lucky so she could stay a whole year in the company because my crazy as fuck manager was replaced by a much nicer at the time who didn't harass her for everyone else's failures. Once I could graduate I looked for a job so I could save enough money to live comfortably in Japan, but nobody ever bothered to read my resume. Except one company, that was going to hire me for the job I wanted but they couldn't because the CEO didn't allow the team to spend money on a new employee after all. Now I have a shitty minimum wage job where I can't see myself in the long run, I'm stuck in a lockdown with my mentally ill family who won't stop inviting random people who don't live with us, and because of my family's religion I can't have a private life at all, whatsoever. Since I was super sick for two month from late April to late June but I still had to recover all summer long but I couldn't be tested back then, my family won't stop making fun of me for not being able to breath and talk normally on the phone back then or saying they're super glad I was nearly dying because at least it made me come back. No idea if it was covid or not, so when I tell my family to be careful and to not invite anyone until the end of the lockdown because I don't want to be this sick again they just think I'm mentally ill.

I feel stuck and seeing people my age or younger who graduated with their master's degree before or at the same time as me getting really good job opportunities thanks to their luck or connections is super frustrating. I'm also seeing many of them settling down with their boyfriends or even getting married. I feel like I wasted my time, energy and health doing everything to improve my life and I'm being punished for daring to be a little tiny bit ambitious and not suffering from imposter's syndrome as hard as the very vast majority of my life.

tldr; I'm so unlucky I'm probably cursed, and I'll die of old age as a turbo after working a minimum wage job if I don't die of stress from my mentally ill family members.

Anonymous 46595

Why are so many american romance movies centered on cheating and unfaithfulness? Most of the time the main character already has a boyfriend, but they make him bad or mediocre to make her cheating justifiable. Why can't it just be a story about two people who weren't already in a relationship? That seems much sweeter to me.

Anonymous 46596

flautism.jpg

I'm paranoid because my relationship is too good to be true, I also just don't understand how people trust each other in relationships. My longest relationship (like the two others I had) was with a nice nerd guy who didn't have a huge number of other options. He still managed to cheat and lie for a year, despite all the conversations about trust and commitment. I always communicated and asked for reassurance, he always responded with so much elaborate bs about how he wants to keep me safe and always be honest with me and he wouldn't even think of lying to me. He was so convincing, presented a lot of sincere-seeming detailed arguments for why committing to me made him the happiest, even cried at times while lying through his teeth.

My now bf is very socially competent, high status and hawt, and especially after going down the redpill rabbithole I can't make myself believe men would ever stay faithful and committed if they can have secret side chicks and flings, no matter how sweet and caring they are towards me and how much cutesy couple stuff and loving sex we have. Why not have best of both worlds since it's so easy to hide affairs? Or why not just pretend to be planning a future just to pass the time with me, until he wants more variety and meets someone new?

My bf has always brought up commitment-related things first and seemed to have thought about them a lot (I'm too chickenshit and have too much pride to risk rejection lmfao). And him being hot has been strangely reassuring since I at least know he isn't just settling for me when he could have all the tinder stacies he wants. But I still have the occasional horrible gut feeling and I worry it will ruin this potentially incredible relationship if I can't curb the anxiety. Or worse, maybe it turns out to be justified in the end. All the commitment talk is just words.

Anonymous 46597

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so tired of being worried about money. the moment i realized every little struggle about adult life stems from not having enough money, and that the crux issue that stems bullshit terms like "adulting" is simply…not having enough money, is when i grew depressed.

i've been green-pilled. it's madness

Anonymous 46598

How do you cope when you no longer feel sexual arousal due to obsessive pornography consumption? I used to be able to look at a nude person and be turned on by the thought of them having sex but now… I just feel nothing. I went from looking at pictures of boobs to erotica to yaoi to hetero fluff hentai to more degenerate hentai to irl pornography to irl BDSM and now I don't feel anything. Images and fantasies that used to sexually arouse me are now not doing anything and it's depressing.
How do I become normal again?

Anonymous 46599

>>46598
Have you tried going without porn for a while. What's the longest you've gone without?

Anonymous 46600

>>46599
>Have you tried going without porn for a while
yeah
>What's the longest you've gone without it?
about a week

Anonymous 46601

>>46598
After years of masturbating to degrading yaoi I had trouble getting aroused by my vanilla bf. 2 years later and it's gotten better. I just stopped consuming drawn porn at all.

Anonymous 46604

>>46600
>A week
You should try going for long a month or more

Anonymous 46605

>>46599
When you say month, do you mean a month without being exposed to any pornography or a month without any porn, written erotica, sexual thoughts and masturbation?

Anonymous 46606

>>46604
go to
>>46605

(I'm a dumbass)

Anonymous 46607

>>46605
Well if you are desensitized to pornography and having to go further to satisfy your needs. If you want to tone it down. I would say limit your porn intake and avoid it or keep it to the minimal. It'll help make more vanilla interest appealing.

Anonymous 46609

Have you guys ever used unprotected, promiscuous sex as a form of self-harm? I wasn't attracted to the guy and thought he was a disgusting person. Is this really so unbelievable or not understandable to do when having a mental breakdown?

I'm treated like a whore for having done this ONCE after being cheated on by my longterm bf who lived with me, while I was losing my home, as a teenager, like, 7 years ago. Is this not entirely different than actually wanting to sleep around unprotected out of desire and carelessness? Is it really so unbelievable that someone going through serious shit use unprotected sex in this way ONE TIME? Would you guys think this makes someone a nympho that fucks indiscriminately? Am I the only person to have done this? The way people STILL treat me 7 years later is like I'm lying and like I couldn't possibly have had unprotected promiscuous sex for the sake of self destruction.

Anonymous 46610

>>46609
I think what you did was extremely silly, and to be honest I don't think you're ever going to live it down. But, I think as long as true to yourself and you stick to your set moral regiment from now on, you won't have to worry about how others judge you.

Anonymous 46614

nana gif.gif

>>46609
That's honestly fine as long it was just a one time first, the fact you acknowledge it was stupid helps your case too

Anonymous 46630

>>46609
Don’t feel bad anon. You’re far from the only one. I have before when going through a breakup because I was like fuck it I just want to feel something, and my best friend has trauma and shit and really was a nympho for a while. That got her into some dangerous situations so I’m definitely not a proponent of coping this way. But… are people really still on your ass about this after seven years? What is so hard to understand about, “yeah I wasn’t actually into him, I was just in a bad place back then.” It happens! You should stop apologizing for it after so long, it was dumb but why should anyone care?

Anonymous 46633

im turning 20 in a few days and i feel like a pathetic mess. this whole past year i've hit several different lowest points and i know unless i get my shit together i'll just sink more. i've been trying but most days it's hard even getting the motivation to try. i was pretty much backstabbed, gaslit, discarded by two of the people i loved most, so i've been kind of grieving i guess. now it's pretty much just me and my bf scrounging change. i kind of dread my birthday, i feel like a shell of myself and i know that day will really get to me because there won't be any celebration or acknowledgement, just the same emptiness as every day. which i know is silly and childish to care about birthdays but fuck i still feel like a child. last year on my birthday i was on a transcontinental flight, i miss it, it was the only good birthday i had in years, i had a lot of hope back then, lately i have none

Anonymous 46643

I can no longer call it binge eating, I am simply being greedy. In a way I suppose this is an improvement.

Anonymous 46653

>find robot from r9k
>he is looking for a mommygf
>he is very sweet and sensitive, was bullied a lot throughout life, has avpd and is a kissless virgin, wants someone to take care of him which, being a highly empathetic person, I am happy to do
>fast forward a few months
>come across one of his handles online
>he has made thousands of incel posts talking about how he wants to rape underage girls, how he wants to fuck 13 year olds, how he wants to throw acid on womens faces, various other sociopathic incel posts about murdering and raping people and a fixation on children
What the hell do I do now? The good boy I fell for does not exist. I had no idea he had so much evil in his heart and it honestly scares me. I confronted him and he claimed it was all parody which it obviously wasn’t.

Anonymous 46659

>>46653
Jesus christ. Please stop fucking meeting guys from /r9k/, you guys. 4chan, and especially r9k, are not like female imageboards. It's nothing but male apologia to act as if they're anything like each other. These people cannot be saved and it's not worth risking your safety over "saving" these people. They aren't good people. I would ghost him. I don't really know what to do. How much does he know about you so far?

Anonymous 46661

>>46659
This 100%.

Anonymous 46662

I really miss my cat so much. It sounds silly, but I tear up a lot because of how much I wish she was with me rn. Having her around makes me feel so warm and loved. She's the only thing that ever made me feel that way in my life, no idea why. I'm not lonely but I just feel so alone and I don't know why. I have friends and I'm in grad school so I see people in my classes regularly. I don't have a boyfriend but I don't really care, because I know that won't fix anything. I think there's something fundamentally wrong with me, because no matter how many people I talk to and hang out with I rarely feel connected to them.

Anyway my cat isn't dead, she's just living with my mom so I'll be able to see her soon. Looking forward to not feeling empty for a while and having someone to love who'll love me back.

Anonymous 46664

i want to go out to dress up and find moar friends and maybe a bf, but my friends are all either "busy" or dont want to go and its so so annoying like what am i meant to do, go out on my own?? it feels like a cycle like once you get stuck with lame friends you cant get out

Anonymous 46665

00b41a471ef32cadf8…

>>46653
>she doesn't know

Anonymous 46669

>>46659
Well he basically spun me a story about how he was a lonely abused kid and ended up in these online spaces due to having no friends. I understand people act out when they are hurting.

But what bothers me is he won’t take responsibility for his own words and actions and keeps trying to shift blame. He keeps saying he didn’t mean any of it and just got ‘caught up’ in that toxic 4chan culture or that he was just showing off to other guys, he claims it was like a competition to see who could be more degenerate and incel-y, he is basically pulling the whole ‘parody’ card which I don’t buy for a second, I can tell a shitpost from a serious post, and I don’t think he was joking about being a hebephile, because most men unironically are hebes anyway.

I’m just disappointed that someone I thought was innocent and sweet turned out to be another perverse coomer incel with violent revenge fantasies and a fixation on very young girls. The person who wrote those posts and the person I grew to know and love are like day and night. He keeps apologizing and begging me to acknowledge they weren’t sincere, but I felt there was a strong grain of sincerity in those posts.

Anonymous 46688

7d2787a195ae0df534…

>>46669
Anon, just know that I am begging for you to ghost him. He's not good at all for you. Nobody jokes about those things. There's always some underlying truth in every joke. Please please please stay safe and get away from him. I don't want to see another genuinely good person fall for some shit like that

Anonymous 46693

>>46669
ghosting is a shitty thing to do

but maybe in this case it will be needed(?)

Anonymous 46697

>>46669
It's definitely a thing to act out when you're abused, but men manipulate and exploit our empathy and they can't be believed as often as we'd like, as you can see here. And the manipulation is even more likely when they're from somewhere like r9k. Weird how manipulative men's "acting out" seems to always involve sexualized abuse and murder of the vulnerable, out of nowhere, while women and girls, who are abused more frequently, and to a more severe degree on average… don't do anything like what he has done. He sounds like a tremendous piece of shit and he wasn't parodying anything. That's always an awful person's go to defense that doesn't want to be held accountable for their disgusting actions, it's always a "joke". I'm sorry this lying fuck wasted your time and played with your feelings. You have to excise him from your life in one way or another, though. Don't let him know anything about yourself or let him convince you he's anything but a psycho. This is not excusable and he sounds very dangerous.

Anonymous 46698

693da3cf-569a-40ae…

>>46669
Dump him sis I beg you

Anonymous 46702

>>46669
>But what bothers me is he won’t take responsibility for his own words and actions and keeps trying to shift blame
You mean that if he took responsibility and admitted that he did 100% mean all those things, but he's changed since then or something, that would satisfy you?

Regardless of whether the things he posted were just bad taste jokes or not, either way he probably fears that claiming they were at all sincere would just make you hate him.
The question is, would it? You seem to be staying with him despite being certain that he was sincere in posting those things. That being the case, I think the solution to your specific problem is just trying all you can to assure him that you don't care or that you can work through it or something if he admits that he was being serious.

On the other hand, if you'd break up with him for confirming that he was being serious in those posts, then the solution is just to break up right now regardless because you're sure that he was being serious anyway and he can't convince you otherwise, so as far as your relationship is concerned it can't really recover from the spot it's in.

Anonymous 46705

I just got back from my psychiatrist and I "sperged" to the receptionist about a trap themed yaoi eroge visual novel that I was playing and mistook her smiling and nodding as genuine interest.
I showed her pictures too!

Anonymous 46708

>>46705
Well if it was up to me I'd pin a medal on you.

Anonymous 46711

>>46705
God damn anon based
Wish I had the courage to openly sperg about my autistic interests no one cares about.
Also drop the name of the visual novel pls

Anonymous 46712

>>46708
I don't really know why you would do that but thanks I guess.

>>46711
It's not courage, just autism.

Also, the name of the vn is Oto Love ~Josou Bishounen Gentei!~

Anonymous 46716

unknown.png

>be me
>haven't had a serious crush on a guy in a few years since my ex broke my heart for another person
>friend introduces new person to online friend group
>corny jokes and slightly autistic
>oh shit he's kinda cute
>he actively flirts and is playful with me with other people around
>after a few weeks he starts talking about his crush
>i get my hopes up since i've been talking to him a lot whenever he's around
>he's actually talking about another girl he likes irl
>admits he's only confident around people he doesn't have an attraction to
>mfw strung along as a practice dummy so he doesn't mess up around his actual crush
Why can't I ever be liked genuinely and not be just another person to be used by guys
It just hurts knowing how replaceable I am to guys I fall for, they always have someone better in mind and I will never be someone's first choice

Anonymous 46717

KcYxPvqfRPs.jpg

Me and my boyfriend haven't been talking or seeing each other as frequently as we've used to. Last time I asked him about why he said that he "just needs some alone time" and that "he haven't been talking much to anyone really" and also that I don't need to bother about it.
Should I really ask him again? Kinda seems like he's losing interest even tho he said he likes to go out with me (not sure if that's even true…) or maybe I'm just being paranoid as fuck.
Also I don't feel quite sexually attracted to him. I don't think it's because I have a low sex drive but rather kinda feel weird and uncomfortable touching a male in a sexual way. When he does that to me I just freeze, lose my balance and go "uhhh…." even though it feels good. When I try to touch his private parts it feels forced and awkward to me, even when we've had a lot of foreplay before. (We're both virgins if it matters.)
I haven't had any relationships before except that weird discord LDR one with a BPD gal (and I was posing as a moid at the time). Maybe that changed my sexual preferences? She even sent me nudes and I liked it… more than my current BF's semi-nudes. I also notice a lot more beautiful women on the streets/web than men, I don't find them attractive unless they have feminine features like long hair, little to no muscle mass, etc. Could I just be a closeted lesbian? If so, how do I break up with my boyfriend explaining the situation? He asked me if I was bi before and I guess he lowkey thinks I am.

Anonymous 46718

>>46716
Moids will always have someone better in mind no matter who you are and what you look like.
This is exactly why they watch porn while being in a relationship. You are never enough for a moid.
"Good" news is that this statement applies to literally all women, so you could be better than someone's girlfriend (if that's important).

Anonymous 46720

>>46716
Sometimes you have to make the first move, even if it's a moids job.
However I do think that he was probably not worthy of you.

Anonymous 46721

>>46717
You were catfishing a straight girl and posing as a moid to get nudes? Wtf. That’s creep behavior.

Anonymous 46722

>>46718
Is it even worth being in a relationship with moids then, due to their coolidge effect coomer tendencies? Everytime my bf watches porn I want to strangle him, and he pretends he doesn’t when I know he does, it makes me extremely resentful. Also the fact I can’t even mention a male celebrity without him seething with jealousy.

Anonymous 46724

>>46721
I know now. That's why I cringe at the memory.
I didn't plan to get any nudes though, she just randomly sent them to me one day, I-I swear!
The nudes weren't my goal, the relationship was a fake, I didn't think of it as anything serious even tho she was literally planning a future with me. I knew that one day she'll find out I'm female and be disgusted at me and/or love me even more bc she was possibly pan, evident by talking how beautiful the girls at her school were, so I logged off Discord one day and never came back.
The problem is, I liked them way more than my bf's half-nudes that he sent me knowing I'm a girl and having seen me IRL.

Anonymous 46725

>>46722
>can’t even mention a male celebrity without him seething with jealousy
Did you talk to him about why does he do that and why you're not allowed to do things he does?

Anonymous 46727

>>46718
This is probably why I find it so difficult to trust moids because this happens every time I think I find a "redeeming" moid. Pretty discouraging but expected to say the least
Good point about being better than someone's girlfriend, but it hasn't happened and I have no hopes of this ever being the case, with the way that things have been for me but damn would it feel good to make someone fall for me like that for once in this miserable life I live

>>46720
Ah man, if I knew the guy had someone else in mind I wouldn't have continued playing into the flirting/back and forth until it was too late. It's a shame, I really liked him too… I guess I had it coming for me for not assuming the worst right away after my experience with getting ditched for another in the past.

Anonymous 46728

I finally found a way to be happy. I tried killing myself, had everything planned out and ready, all the tools and everything, but instead I decided to turn to God for a little while. I couldn't quite keep up with him. Didn't have the energy to pray and read my Bible anymore.
But I did close myself off from everyone I knew and taught myself how to be a hermit. Eventually I taught myself that it was ok to be completely alone, sex wasn't ok or good, and that it's ok that men don't love you and it's ok to die alone. Comfy, even.
But I… "witnessed" a boy recently. I don't even know him irl. He's a stupid e-celeb. And it made me want a bf again and now I'm going back through this whole cycle of despairing over how evil men are and that I'll be alone forever. God fucking damn it. How do I make myself asexual again?

Anonymous 46729

A2A11BD3-739E-4BB6…

I’m weak and pathetic as shit on my own. I’m so tired of helping others. All I want is a hunky bougie beefcake daddybf to provide for and take care of me. It’s not fair. Why do I always have to be the savior or the manic pixie girl who brings meaning to some moids life just so he can better himself and leave me anyway?

Anonymous 46730

>>46728
Invent the fantasy in your head, and be content with the fantasy. Remember you can control it. Get a sexy moid tulpa. That’s been my coping mechanism for the last 25 years.

Anonymous 46731

I'm so fucking bored and lonely when my brother and boyfriend are asleep.

Anonymous 46732

>>46730
God I'm so fucking sad. How do I do that? Will I go insane?

Anonymous 46733

>>46729
I want to sniff and clean his balls after a long day of him running errands in the hot sun

Anonymous 46736

>>46733
Larping moid detected

Anonymous 46737

>>46736
Lolno I’m just incredibly sexually frustrated and want to hatefuck him after watching Gone Girl.

Anonymous 46738

EftVUY7XoAcj3r1.jp…

I am feeling extremely lonely right now, no friends, no family, never had a bf. And the worst part it's that right now i am a NEET so depressed that i can't even do anything to change my situation

Anonymous 46741

I found an e-bf but I don’t really like his character anymore and want to dump him. The thing is I absolutely hate hurting other people’s feelings, even when they are hurting mine, pathetic I know. If he was upset I would feel terrible especially since he isn’t really the most attractive guy and probably doesn’t have many options. Ugh. I hate this feeling.

Anonymous 46742

I have nothing to offer. I rarely even think about getting a bf again anymore. I'm coming to terms that I'll die alone, and I'm not exactly angry about it. I still feel lonely from time to time and I miss having someone to talk to and cuddle with.

I don't want to hurt and be hurt again, and I have nothing to offer.

Anonymous 46743

>>46653
Confront him about it if you really care. But, tbh, there are is no such thing as a good person. Even I have my own vices.

Anonymous 46744

>>46741
You are already feeling like shit so might as well get something out of it. Besides its only gonna sting a little bit then you get over it. Just like ripping a band-aid.

Anonymous 46745

>>46743
Having vices =/= wanting to throw acid on women's faces, murder women and rape children and women. Let us not pretend these are most people's vices. Also, vices don't necessarily change someone's actual character and morals.

Anonymous 46746

I seem to have a permanent piss off face. I notice that a lot of times when people need something from me, they apologize.

Anonymous 46747

>>46745
Well, the other posters are right that meeting people from /r9k/ is pretty much begging to meet very damaged people, and yes, it's a big flag when they talk about throwing acid or murdering and raping women and children.

I guess, what I meant to say was that a lot of posters on anonymous messageboards in general are edgy for the sake of it, so maybe she wants to clarify things.

But you're right. What he posted isn't exactly on the same level as those casual racism for fun shit or banter for the sake of it.

Anonymous 46748

I have so much work to do and am so overwhelmed even doing so little. I can barely wash my hair without feeling exhausted, let alone maintain my job, home, pets, ugh. I don't know how people even have the energy to hang out with and speak to people. I feel too tired to even text or call anyone back, ever, and it ends up making me lose so many money making opportunities.

Anonymous 46756

>>46741
Honestly, I think it;s best to dump him before it's too late. You shouldn't feel bad, I know it's hard but it's best to think about yourself than others in a first place. In the end if you don't dump him sooner you will feel even worse.

Anonymous 46760

>>46748
You're depressed/stressed out. Do a bit of new things, take a breather. Don't stress yourself out. You're okay.

Anonymous 46761

1585115264599.jpg

>>46738
I'm your fren

Anonymous 46765

i found a number on my fiance's phone yesterday morning texting him "do you want to meet up this weekend?" i foolishly asked him about it before i could look it up, he says he has no idea who it is but something's fishy. i called and got no response, but i'm glad i called, because he doesn't know that i did and deleted the text. i still remember the last 4 digits, when he gets back i'm gonna get ahold of his phone and find that number again in the call log. i hope to god he's telling me the truth

Anonymous 46767

>>46733
>actors
>errands

moid. its you who would be doing all the errands there is a reason why actors get divorced more than 50 times just look at dicaprio dating history.

Anonymous 46769

Fuckfuckgo.jpg

>>46765
You're doing the right thing, just be careful not to get so caught up in suspicion it's all you can see no matter what you're looking at
>>46767
Dicaprio's dating history is that way not because he gets girls to do his errands, its cause he prefers young women

Anonymous 46773

>the only biological goal of life is to procreate
>infertility diagnosed
I will never have children, my body will never produce new life, nobody will remember me when I die. I'm literally a faulty product of nature

Anonymous 46774

>>46773
Take the antinatalismpill.
If you were to give birth, imagine how hard the child would have to suffer just because they're alive, double points if it'd be a daughter.
Bringing someone into this world is the ultimate selfish act.

Anonymous 46775

>>46773
You're not faulty anon, your body can still do amazing things and you can form bonds with and be a light to people of all ages through your life, you don't have to die alone and forgotten at all, you will still love and be loved, even if you choose not to adopt you can be a positive force in a lot of kids (or adults!) lifes and make a difference for them, and many will love you for it.

Anonymous 46781

117195753_63039733…

>>46717
Today was a weird day.
While I was at my bf's house, I joked about the black dress hanging on the clothes line asking him if it's his (he's sent me pictures of him crossdressing before, he's a weird dude and I gotta admit that I liked the pics).
Suddenly he goes to his closet and asks me if I'd like to see him cross-dressing IRL. I wasn't against it so I agreed.
When he was done and dressed nicely in a girls dress and also a sock-stuffed bra, I felt something and pushed him against the wall, making out with him passionately and fondling his fake breasts.
Then I got my hands under his skirt and groped him (he didn't like it tho so I stopped).
He was seemingly surprised at me being very passionate, so he asked me why wouldn't I just date a woman instead.

I am now fully convinced that I'm a lesbian or that I'm really, really into women.
But the question is, how do I break up with him now that I know?

Anonymous 46785

images.jpeg

>>46774
There is a lot of suffering in life but I like being alive
>>46775
Yeah, that's kinda true but it still hurts that picrel is not for me

Anonymous 46787

>>46781
Is this fake? Sounds hot as fuck.

Anonymous 46789

My bf is really psychologically abusive to me and gaslights me constantly, and I don’t know how to leave him because it’s a horribly toxic codependent relationship. I’m completely psychologically, emotionally and financially dependent on him, I moved country just to be with him. He uses my past sexual abuse to pavlov train me, and he knows I’m really insecure and compare myself to other girls and his exes, today he wanted me to get him off and tried to convince me to have a threesome with him and his ex and used his prettiest ex who he still talks about constantly, specifically to trigger me. Then when I got sad he claimed it was just a joke when it clearly wasn’t, called me a dramatic bitch and he went to bed to watch porn loudly and left me alone to cry. I feel like complete shit. I’m such a doormat.

Anonymous 46790

>>46787
I was expecting replies like this.
The situation still seems kinda surreal to me, especially when it all happened in a slavic country.
But no, otherwise I'd be posting this on a fanfiction website and not in a venting thread.

>>46789
>financially dependent
Are you still able to contact your parents/relatives/friends from your home country?

Anonymous 46791

>>46785
>There is a lot of suffering in life but I like being alive
Why is that? In my opinion, the cons of being alive outweigh the pros by a huge margin.
Unless you come from a super rich family in the first world where all the family members are 100% mentally sane women (and that is very much impossible) or just straight up masochistic.

Anonymous 46792

The days are too short these days…

Anonymous 46796

if my stupid sloppy moid bf leaves beer cans and cigarette butts outside my apartment one more time im going to snap. i keep getting bitchy emails from my landlady and there are CHILDREN RUNNING AROUND, his loud ass smoker's cough is humiliating enough already, since it's my name on the lease i get all the flack. it's pissing me off so much, i'm kind of a slob myself so i feel like i can't even truly confront him about this without him pointing out my flaws. but i don't leave fucking garbage where other people are walking and living!!! i hate littering!!!! this is so frustrating

Anonymous 46797

>>46773
A lot can happen with science and medicine in 60+ years or however long you have left. Maybe they'll eventually find a way to fix your condition. Hell, you could even raise a clone of yourself as a child.

Anonymous 46798

>>46773
All we really can do is deal with whatever we're dealt with. If you want to adopt, then that's fine and admirable of you. If you take the antinatalismpill well, I'm not into that, but good luck.

Anonymous 46799

>>46781
I think you should take a bit of time to confirm that you're a lesbian first and that it's not just some temporary thing that you're feeling.

If however, you're convinced that you are and you want to break up with him, then like most breakups, it's always best to do it in person, keep it simple and to the point.

Anonymous 46800

>>46781
>I am now fully convinced that I'm a lesbian or that I'm really, really into women.
Are you no longer attracted to your bf at all or something? You could be bi, or you could be hetero with a crossdressing kink, or any number of other intermediate situations. Be careful about jumping to conclusions.
Remember that there are guys who love getting pegged by women but would never be attracted to an actual man. Sexuality isn't necessarily so black and white.
I definitely think breaking up with him at this stage would be premature. It hasn't even been a full day for you to think about how you feel.

Anonymous 46801

>>46796
Tu quoque is a logical fallacy, that is not a valid argument. I know arguing with an irrational person is absolutely awful but don't let him do that to you.

Anonymous 46805

This is going to sound like a weird complaint, but here it goes: my bf makes me laugh too much.
We've known each other since childhood so we've got over 20 years of references and in-jokes with each other, and those, combined with his really jokey personality means a lot of the time he barely has to try to be funny and I'm a wheezing mess.Sometimes though it's not really appropriate to be laughing at loud, like at some kind of event for someone where someone is speaking, and it's not appropriate for me to just randomly start guffawing after he whispers something funny in my ear. And like, I can't even really get mad at him because I love him to absolute death and he's always trying to make me laugh and enjoy myself, so I feel like kind of a bitch sometimes when he goes home after a weekend stay and my chest hurts from laughing so much while he was here. Like how much of a bitch would I be if I asked him 'please stop being so charming and funny', like that just sounds stupid. So like AAAA idk what to do about it. It's not even a big issue, but just something I think about from time to time and kinda annoys me sometimes. As crazy as that sounds.

Anonymous 46808

>>46781
getting wet over a man in a dress and a bra doesn't make you a lesbian.

Anonymous 46810

66630446_416825855…

>>46800
He told me many times that he doesn't want anything to come near his butthole and that he would heavily dislike getting pegged so I highly doubt he'd change his mind. He also hates it when I touch his butt, sadly.
>no longer attracted to your bf at all
Problem is, I kinda wasn't in the first place. See this one >>46717

>>46799
I'm trying to figure out but I definetely know I'm attracted to women (maybe because my previous relationship was with an actual one and that kinda changed my perception but again it wasn't that serious)

>>46808
Yeah, it doesn't. But why do I only like the most feminine/androgynous men? And why, when that shit was happening, I actively imagined him being an actual, XX-chromosomed woman with real breasts?

By the way, I haven't contacted him since then yet. We're used to talk to each other one time in, like, a week so I definitely have some time.

Anonymous 46812

>>46810
>He told me many times that he doesn't want anything to come near his butthole and that he would heavily dislike getting pegged
I didn't mean your bf specifically.
I meant that if it's possible for a guy to like it in the butt but not like sex with men, then it's possible for you to like the contrast of a guy in a dress with fake tits but not necessarily crave sex with actual women.
It's fine if you do, but don't pigeonhole yourself into "X made me feel Y therefore I must be Z." Take time to consider what you actually want, not what you believe it makes sense for you to want based on what society says about what things specific kinds of people should enjoy.

Anonymous 46871

im depressed because the only guys I seem to attract are abusers, narcissists and sociopaths. I date guys who seem nice and kind and then they always turn out to be monsters 6 months into the relationship.



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