Sudden Hypersexuality Anonymous 13471
I've known my partner for 3 years and we've been dating for 1 year, so I know him pretty well. Our sex life has never been dull, but we usually only have sex 2 or maybe 3 times a week and will get handsy with each other every week. For the last 2 weeks, his sexual appetite has been changing and ramping up. It started with him being very seductive and asking to eat me out as we made dinner, then having sex the day after, which is a little odd but not that unusual. From there he ramped up to wanting sex every day and now having sex TWICE a day as he wakes up desperate for me each morning. He NEVER wants to have sex in the morning usually, and previously couldn't understand why people did, but now every morning he starts feeling me up like we're teenagers. Even more unusual is now we LIKES blowjobs, whereas previously he was never interested in them and actually requests them (not often, but 2 in the last couple of weeks is equal to the number I've given before this point). Most strange of all is that now we can cum in under 10 minutes and his refractory period is about that, too. Previously, all our sex was long and very slow, because it took him minimum 30 minutes to cum, which was a little frustrating because I only take about 15 minutes, and if I wanted to go again I had to wait an hour or so. Now he will just start kissing me, testing to see if I'm in the mood, then hoist me onto the nearest surface in the house and we can fuck like rabbits and cum together in under 10 minutes, then rush to bed, make out and go again.
I'm by no means against this sudden change, as I actually love having 2-3 orgasms a day and the rush of intimacy, but it has me worried, curious and a little sore. People have told me it means he's cheating on me, but unless he has a stealth mistress on 24/7 standby and speed dial, it doesn't seem possible with our lifestyle. Others have suggested he intends on leaving me or that he may have an illness. Can anyone offer any insights?
Anonymous 13472
>>13471I thought guys wanting
less sex was the sign that they were cheating.
I think he’s probably just growing more attached to you. He sounds sweet.
Anonymous 13474
>>134711. He cheated or hired a prostitute and now wants more and more sex to fuel fantasies
2. He's been cheating with or masturbating to someone he's lost access to and now takes out his excess energy on you
3. He wants something from you and this is intended as flattery
4. He wants to trap you with a baby, so he's using this as a smokescreen to make it seem like an accident when he sabotages your preventative
5. He wants to break up and this is him trying to reignite some passion or just feeling guilty
6. He's started or stopped taking medications like SSRIs or psychiatric treatment and this is his libido changing before his behaviour radically changes
Anonymous 13477
sounds like he's doing a steroid cycle lol
Anonymous 13480
>>13471Me again. We had sex FOUR times yesterday and I am not only sore and worn out, but I had to just reject him this morning and afternoon to give myself a break. He immediately wondered if there was something wrong with me and has been trying to seduce me into bed for the last 2 hours with incredible persistence. I asked why he was so lusty and he just made a joke about me acting and dressing provocatively.
>>13472That's what I thought. It might be that he just feels closer to me now, but nothing much has changed recently and it's just so sudden. He is very sweet, so turning him down is no big deal to him.
>>13474None of these are very realistic for a variety of reasons.
>>13477Do steroids increase libido? In the past he's mentioned how jealous he is of guys at his gym who take steroids because it makes everything so easy, but he's always discounted it because of the side effects. I don't think he'd start now that he doesn't need them to improve anymore.
Anonymous 13481
he's trying to baby trap you, watch out!
Anonymous 13482
>>13471I feel like this is something you have to sit down and discuss with him, it ruins the vibe but, it's better to get a handle on it early just in case it goes to a dark place and he gets even more pushy.
I sadly wouldn't have a theory on why he acts like that without knowing more about him so, just ask him and work out a stable balance and set some clear boundaries, good luck!
Anonymous 13483
>>13480>Do steroids increase libido?Depending on his baseline testosterone level (sounds low to average from what you described before), tremendously so if he's on T. Actually, most men these days have very low T by the standards of decades ago, so this isn't really unhealthy as long as he's getting medical checkups and dosing safely. Even men in their 20s and 30s get T replacement/supplements these days.
It's concerning if he's doing it without telling you though. Sit him down and get the truth out of him, he might just be embarrassed if his doc told him he had low T or something.
Anonymous 13484
>>13481He's actually the one that wants to wait until I get a promotion that comes with better maternity leave, so that's not it.
>>13482>>13483We do most of our talking in bed in the morning, which was a little counterproductive for a talk about why he can't keep his hands off me, I'll admit. He hasn't started taking steroids or hormones, but when I mentioned it we realised we have changed our diets significantly in the last few months and he hasn't had bloodwork done since COVID. I think I'll ask him to get his T levels measured and see if maybe our diet and newish lifestyle is responsible. The way he describes it, just looking at me bleary-eyed and bedheaded in a Spyro onesie is sexy enough to drive him to distraction. Thanks for the advice, nonas.
Anonymous 13495
Could be anything really. He could've stopped taking some medication, steroids cause increased sexdrive if you have a gym bf. Possibly he might've gotten over some trauma or might be less depressd/stressed lately.
Anonymous 13542
all of you are always like, "HES CLEARLY DOING SOMETHING BAD" while youre clearly just jealous that somebody has a nice BF
Anonymous 13550
>>13471have you tried asking him?
asking usually works.
Anonymous 13647
>>13471If he is cheating right now, then you wouldn't be having sex as often. I don't think you have to worry about that. It's rather strange though. I guess people's libidos change depending on various factors. Perhaps he was depressed or something before, or maybe he was two timing you and now he isn't, or maybe he was masturbating and stopped for you. I don't know, could be a change of diet or activity that changes his hormones. That's a thing too
Don't stress about it too much, I think you're good
>>13481Do men do that?
Anonymous 13711
>>13471>>13484Update: So he had some tests done and his testosterone levels almost doubled between last year and now, which a doctor basically just shrugged at and put down to a change in diet (we just started eating more fish and legumes). Another possibility we explored was his change from listening to music during the workday and reading mostly non-fiction history at home, to listening to fiction audiobooks at work, some of which have sex and romance. Personally, I think it may have been me taking more of an interest in learning skills. He refuses to admit it, but I think he has some pretty deeply buried negative views about perceived incompetence in women (helplessness and laziness was encouraged in the women in his family and community) and I think learning to cook, use tools for home DIY and car repair was actually deeply attractive to him. Of course, he'd never admit he was ever any less in love with, or attracted to, me than he is now, but those demonstrations of competency in things he's good at coincide almost perfectly with his sudden leap in sexual appetite.
On the bright side, I know what really turns him on now, we've set a hard limit of 2x penetrative sex per day, and we learned we're both in peak physical and reproductive health so now is the perfect time to get started on baby-having.
