/nsfw/ - xxx

i'm really really really bad at sex. i have no idea what makes myself feel good as i haven't learned to masturbate yet, so when i try to have sex i kind of just focus on pleasing the male, which i am also really bad at. i'm such a mess of insecurities, anxieties, and boredom that I cannot mentally get into the act whatsoever. i spend the entire time holding back tears, which i let loose right after my partner finishes B^)

really sucks because im super into this guy right now but i'm afraid i'll never be able to overcome my issues and he'll drop me for someone that isn't so damn neurotic

>>332
anon pls. i'm trying really hard not to just project onto you, a stranger, but you sound like someone who would just not benefit from having sex until you're ready. what is the point of trying it you aren't doing it because you really really want to and it even upsets you to do it? what is the point? it can be wonderful if you do it because you truly want to but other than that it can be awful if not traumatizing. It's not uncommon for a woman to not find herself and what works for her sexually until later on and you seem like one of those cases. Like you need more time to find what you like before it's worth it.

>>335
yeah, i know. the last time i had sex was. back in december, and before that, summer 2015 with my first and only boyfriend. it sucks, cause even though i don't have much of a drive, i've been fascinated by sexuality for a long time. i guess i just don't do well when i put myself in that situation.

i'm not ready now, and i certainly wasn't ready back then, but i'm not sure how i'd ever become prepared to do the dirty and not hate it

>>337
i think if you have a small semblance of a sex drive it's still possible for you to develop a more intense sexuality, but you need to figure out what you like by yourself first. it's not going to happen from fucking people you're not attracted to when you're barely aroused. i think what you said about anxieties and insecurity makes sense. ime really wanting to fuck someone without shame or fear or some weird coping mechanism is very difficult if you're neurotic or anxious or self conscious. i wasn't able to get into it until i had a very different attitude towards myself and my life. doens't mean you have to be 100% mentally spotless to be ready,but a healthy, fully-realized sexuality and self-conscious neuroticism just don't mix.

How does one find out what they like without having sex with anyone? Like there's masturbation but like… it seems like masturbating and having sex with someone are two totally different things.

>>339
they are totally different but if you're straight and/or after penetration you can experiment with different dildo/vibe combinations in different positions to get some idea of what you like

okay this is a very virgin question to ask but where exactly does the dick fit into in the vagina. like where does it go LOL

>>341
So, when your vagina is nice and wet, follow the line where your labia majora meet (the fatty flaps) and keep on following it down until you feel an indent. Press with one finger (when your vagina is lubricated) and it should go nicely inside. If you feel a flat surface after the indent, you've gone too far(that's the area ahead of your anus, it's called your perineum).

i can't fucking be on top. it's embarrassing. i don't know how to do it.

i have kind of messed up hips so maybe that has something to do with it. but my bf loved girl on top before me and now all he wants to do is lie on top of me because apparently i suck so bad at it. i don't know what i'm doing wrong, but i even tried to get him to just let me figure it out but he had to stop because he said it was so uncomfortable.

i'm good at being sexy but bad at sex. i have a tilted cervix, could that have anything to do with it

>>353
Being on top is dicey in general imo because you can more easily injure their dick in that position. Whenever I irritate my S.O's foreskin, it tends to be because I was on top.

I'm good at straight sex, but I don't enjoy it all that much. It's ok, but not great. I miss girls, but I haven't slept with one in five years and my ex-gf was anorgasmic so I have no idea if I was even good or not. I'm scared of sleeping with girls because I don't want to be terrible. I'm also scared that my vulva is ugly. I'm legit considering hiring an escort to help me practice and to help me get more confidence.

>>776
>she never lied down in front of a mirror to see what her vagina looks like
what the hell have you been doing with your life?

>>785
I know what it looks like. I'm not a complete idiot. I wouldn't kick someone out of bed for having a vag like mine but I know it doesn't look ideal by a long way.

>>794
Oh, I see. That's how I am about my face :(
My bad.

Have an apologetic doritos hair.

I think being “good” at sex requires practice. Specifically with one person because see with anyone is different from another. I chose to stay abstinent for years because I was turned off by a string of abusive partners. When I decided to get back in the game again I treated sex as if it were my first time all over again because I didn’t like the stigma that I’d come to learn from having the wrong types of relationships. Now that I’m an adult I can choose what I want out of sex without feeling like it has to be something that is expected to be a certain way. I wasn’t that young when I lost my virginity but I was very uneducated and mentally not at all prepared.
If you meet someone who doesn’t have any expectations of you and is willing to work with you as if it’s your first time and letting you discover sex in your own way, then you can get “good” at having sex with that one person and that’s all that matters. Unless you are wanting to sleep around in which case I guess the main key is probably confidence like everyone seems to think anyone can magically obtain…

>>822
Animu characters with Doritos hair

I'm also really bad at sex because of my insecurities. It's mostly my face. I'm so worried that I make it look weird so I prefer positions where my face isn't visible to him.

I also don't know what to do with my body in general. Penetration alone doesn't really make me feel anything so just doing what makes me feel good doesn't work either.

To be "good at having sex" you have to really just have fun with it and enjoy it. Men can tell when you're being overly self conscious and not enjoying yourself and it generally turns them off and dooms the encounter

>>1149
You can't sit with us