tfw no bf Anonymous 14789
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>tfw no bf
>tfw resting bitch face prevents men from ever approaching me
why is it so hard for you anons to get bfs?
my problem was depresshun and feeling like i wasn't worthy of one.
If you want a guy to take advantage of and abuse you, all you need to do is to go outside. Plenty of fish in the sea, or so it is said.
I've seen men before. Just last year I've met up with a cute Canadian, he flew over to meet me in another city in the country.
Ghosted me the week after after two years of a LDR.
There's a point to be made for developing your personality through interacting with people, but what's the point of spending time even on the "good" guys when they pull shit like this?Additional info: I've lived in that city before and was showing him around most the time. My own perception is that it all went well, something he didn't dispute then nor ever. So I don't even know the reason, to this day.
You didn't explain how the took advantage of you. He just ghosted you, which is pretty awful, but not the same. He even flew over to meet you!
You're right, this particular example held little in the way of taking advantage. Its purpose was explaining that even the rare few who aren't out to do that will drop you like a pair of gloves.
I could post a few stories of another nature if you feel that'd be better, but we had too many of them in the previous thread already - even without me contributing.
Oh, and>He even flew over to meet you!
Makes it look like he actually cared doesn't it?
In hindsight I don't feel that I was the main attraction of that trip, but I'm happy you do, I guess. He had a good month more of travel planned out after me, if anything I was convenient.
I'm overly shy which makes me seem uninterested even when I'm interested. What am I supposed to do when guy gives me looks and smiles?
I do but then what? We both look and smile but I don't know what to do next! It makes me feel so tingly I'm almost questioning if he's actually smiling to me in the first place and if I'm only imagining it.
you must be imagining it then.
I don't get why people go on about their "resting face", like are these people just going round with their face blank? If you want to look friendly you smile, if you want to look cool act disaffected etc etc. Surely that is what expressions are about
It's like someone complaining about not being able to walk because they have a resting leg.
(sorry if this came across as mean I genuinely am curious)
walk up to him and discuss your future wedding plans with him
nta, but for me when I'm not concentrating on it my face just automatically tenses up and I furrow my brows. It's difficult to always think of your face when doing other tasks throughout the day, although I try.
>r9k is now full of guys talking about how they fucked sooo many girls bro!
just kill all men pls
>>14823>tfw tfw no bf but also want to genocide men
I feel you.
where can I go to restore my faith that there are quality men out there?
I'm lucky to have a decent guy in my family, although that obviously isn't the case for most.
I like to hang around anti-anti-feminist forums/male video creators to detox sometimes. They're at least a bit more decent than outright robot and incel misogynists.
Unless you agree with more trad views, in which case I cannot help you.>>14826
I'm down for a trans bf honestly. They're usually cuter and cleaner.
>>14829>I'm down for a trans bf honestly. They're usually cuter and cleaner.
that's the spirit! Take pride knowing there are some men out there who shower more than once a day!
[im the anon who made that other thread with the pink haired anime girl as the picture that was essentially a tfw no bf thread about my complicated relationship with my crush if anybody recognizes me]
t f w n o b f
i really just can't stand this loneliness, i want somebody to want me so bad. i want to have my first kiss, i want my first irl bf, i want a bf to hang out with at lunch break and after school. that just sounds like the most heartwarming thing ever. i have been so lonely my whole life and ive never wanted to let anybody in until around this year, now i really know what im missing out on and i wanna bf so bad.
the other day i just sat in bed and cried because i felt so lonely and unwanted
except me to come back though, cause tfw no bf is something i feel/think about every single day
when that's the high watermark for cute then it's not looking good for ftms, I'm sorry but /bendercritical/ on lolcow has ruined trans people for me by showing me what the average is like
also I melt when I smell a good smelling man musk>>14830>more than once a day
that's literally more than me though
i wonder what my future first bf is going to feel about how much of a mess i am. i would never ever drop a huge bomb about my mental health on him or be dependent on him but i can't even hide it. the scars on my thighs and forearms that i do my best to hide, the marks on my knuckles from purging, my protruding ribs, the bags under my eyes. i hope my future bf won't be scared away
I dream about literally just hanging out with a cute guy that likes me romantically sometimes
just hanging out, but we'd have those moments where our eyes would meet and we'd both smile and he's put his hand on my shoulder randomly
>>14832>more than once a day>that's literally more than me though
and now we know why u no have bf; joking.
but in all seriousness, if you dont want ftms you can try other men. For instance men with good hygiene (hilariously refereed to as "metrosexuals" as if decent hygiene is somehow alien) or asexual dudes. Find a man in real-life who seems friendly and caring and not sex-obsessed stinky man. Some may say "uwu just get into some sort of male-dominated hobby/interest group" but I wouldn't recommend going into any chan-like group spouting off memes because those type of men tend to be no good.
me too anon, me too
just standing around doing essentially nothing with somebody i mutually like is all i want in life
I mean, the uwu soft gay bois with tiddy out are usually kind of gross but many ftms just want to pass as men.
I guess I'm a bit of a ~handmaiden~ since I'm not totally against trans people (obviously). Although some are assholes like with any group, I'm sympathetic to the fact that they're going through a lot of internal nonsense. Maybe I've just had experiences with too many nice trans people.
Not to argue with you too much here since I know neither of us will change our mind.
Anyway Jamie is top tier for what I find attractive but I admit my standards are a bit weird. Any skinny guy with big eyes is an 10/10 to me.
I just don't see why, unless you do a lot of activity, you would need to shower more than once a day regularly, what dirt is getting on me over the course of the day I need to wash off? And when does the second shower occur anyway? The evening? Why does it matter how clean I am when I'm sleeping if it's all coming off in the morning.
I am freaking out about this as far as I knew no one showered multiple times a day every day.
I used to shower twice because I was neurotic about sweating even a little. It dried the fuck out of my skin. Do not recommend.
Now I only shower twice on workout days.
Do you think there are guys that would just be ok with cuddling all night instead of having sex? What is the minimum amount of sex I need to give a guy for him to stay interested in me?
>>14824>tfw tfw no bf but also want to genocide men>I feel you.
why would you want to genocide all men yet still want to obtain the bf? In doing so you limit yourself to two choices of men
1) the type of man who hangs out with leftist/progressive women in hopes of becoming "friends with them"
2) the r9k type femdom/mommydom fetishist
I have an innate desire for male partnership but in reality most men are disappointing at best.
Option two would be nice if they didn't also hate women on top of it.>take care of me and spank me mommy BUT YOU ARE INFERIOR LEGALIZE RAPE
Absolute state of robots.
Ideal choice is lefty feminist into femdom but they don't exist. Men always want the opposite in the bedroom of what they want irl, it's strange.
what does it feel like to be hugged?
If you could wake up tomorrow and have your ideal BF by your side what would be the first activity you would wish to do together?
I always desired one day cooking together as a couple and while i'm doing a certain task he sneaks up behind me and hugs me.
I never had a boyfriend so wholesome moments like that are what I look forward too, but one can always dream.
That sounds cute, I'd like that too. As for me I'd like to fall asleep together, maybe while hugging each other or holding hands. Just physical contact in general, and the idea of trusting someone enough to fall asleep in front of them is appealing.
I'd like to cook for him, someone appreciating something you made with your own two hands sounds nice as well.
I've found that to keep a boy affectionate and 'bonded' to you ya have to give it up semi-regularly, their lizard brains just work like that unfortunately
I'm don't understand wanting a boyfriend but maybe the problem is you're not looking where you should.
I think Machamp is best bf. For everyone here. Why? Muscular, kind, considerate, does what you want, keeps away robots and shitty people, plus helpful around the home and could easily be utilized to fix things around the house.
Also, forgot to add
You can easily bring him everywhere with you to ensure he doesn't cheat (pokeball). You can also shut him up by the same mechanism.
>>14879>I always desired one day cooking together as a couple and while i'm doing a certain task he sneaks up behind me and hugs me.
this does not bode well for your survival if you are ever in a horror film anon
I'd like to watch a movie or something under some blankets on a freezing cold day. The idea of having another human being to be close to me and keep me warm sounds really comfy.
I like your situation too. Just the general idea of a best friend you can touch that touches you as well sounds really nice.
I've decided I don't want a pokemon, I want a cute and tall bf who can hold me when we watch movies
Paradigm Shift: What if he fucking died and that's the reason he stopped messaging you?
>>14812>but I'm happy you do, I guess
anon, so passive aggressive. that's all i can assume from your previous post, you made it seem like he cared and didn't give any info to make us think otherwise. it's not a big deal.
just look him in the eye, give a firm handshake and ask him out
>in and out psychiatric hospitals since age 13
>disappeared from high school
>cannot socialize without feeling suicidal and on guard for abandonment
>somehow charming to men
>men get sick of me once they see the truth
>are many years of therapy just a meme?
kek, should I bring a resume with me? Is it bad if my only reference is my mum?
God I want a short bf.
But I am cursed.
>>14789>ywn have bone cancer and a /fit/ husbando who loves you enough to carry you around in the store>ywn be petite and frail
You jest, but I know a girl who went on a blind date with a guy and he brought a resume with his mom as a reference to prove he'd be a good boyfriend.
That's kinda sweet, I mean it's definitely weird and I feel kinda bad for him, but it sounds like he was trying to impress her. How did it turn out?
if you're frail you don't really need a /fit/ bf, I am always surprised by strong a completely average looking guy is>>15091>>15097
tbh that's really quite funny
lol that's so cute. My little brother who has asperger syndrome is the kind of boy who would do something like that seriously if I recommended it as a joke.
I'm not frail yet though. And true but i also just happen to like /fit/ boys who are several times larger than me
How do I know if I guy I like is bf material, what are the most common redflags anyone should be aware of?
I grew up in a not-so-nice house so I have lots of anxiety when judging someone
How old are you? Have you tried getting a bf?
try finding out what you enjoy in life (BY TRIAL AND ERROR not by sitting and thinking "gee that would probably suck") and focus on that
Maybe you are ugly, or too pretty, or maybe you have a shitty actitude
Maybe your outdated notions of dating are holding you back.
Aside from the lack of boyfriend, do you have any friends or social connection to meet people?
Do you leave the house? Do you have social hobbies? Do you ever interact with men? Are you generally lonely?
how attractive do you find yourself?
I don't mean to be too pushy or not understanding with some ideas but, have you ever tried a pay to use dating website?
From what a guy your age told me, if you're a girl and
-don't have kids
that you are high priority in the late 20s bracket.
*he never defined crazy much except that one seemingly normal girl he went out to dinner with started showing him all her fresh cut marks and telling him in detail a story for each one and he ended the story with "and then I realized why she was on e-harmony and willing to go out with me"
You should talk to guys. If guys around your age are single they're probably very shy. Making the first move or at least coming half way with it could be enough to have him do the first move. Usually sitting next to someone, looking him in the eyes, and smiling will encourage them. Talking to them is always a sure bet.
You can't really tell things like that from mere superficial traits if that's what you mean, but generally anyone with anger issues is to be avoided.
Where can I find a cute pretty gfd boyfriend…? I've thought about going to munches, but I have no one to come with me and am afraid of going alone. I also think that environments like that breed people only interested in their sexual desires, and I'm looking for a primarily romantic relationship. Advice femanons?
guys are always going to assume going in that expressing any desire to be sumbissive or not assertive is going to turn you off and will end up with him getting cheated on.
if this is something you're interested in you're going to have to broach the subject yourself, I can't imagine any guy who would dump you over it.
Can I ask why do you want a gfd boyfriend in the first place?
also what's a munch?
>>15175>guys are always going to assume going in that expressing any desire to be submissive or not assertive is going to turn you off and will end up with him getting cheated on. if this is something you're interested in you're going to have to broach the subject yourself, I can't imagine any guy who would dump you over it.
They don't necessarily dump me over it, it's just that normal guys are never comfortable with the initiative I like taking into a relationship (paying for meals, opening doors, teasing them in public, etc.)… and It makes me uncomfortable and awkward when they try to or when they try to struggle against me to do it themselves or even worse, try to get me to owe them something by paying for meals or by doing things they think are nice.
>Can I ask why do you want a gfd boyfriend in the first place?
I'm unsure, I'm pretty sure I'm just wired that way, I've never been attracted to the manly types, I don't enjoy vanilla sex, and I've only ever had dreams from a dominant context. Romantically it feels much easier to trust someone when they're vulnerable to you, having a responsibility to care and love for someone gives me motivation, and my god, they're just so cute.
>also what's a munch?
It's an event where a bunch of people who are interested in bdsm meet up at a coffee shop/bar/any other food drink place casually to talk about bdsm with similar minded people.
I think that sounds like just a matter of communication, like I said men always go in with the assumption that they have
to always be dominant and masculine to attract women
just be clear you want to be the one to do those things
So what you go for twink looking types? Do you often hit on gay guys by accident?
>I think that sounds like just a matter of communication, like I said men always go in with the assumption that they have to always be dominant and masculine to attract women
My point was kind of that it's not just a matter of communication. Even when I make it clear to normal guys through action, that I like being dominant, they either stubbornly hold onto how they think they're supposed to behave, are too uncomfortable or egotistical to yield any control, or get suspicious of it.
>So what you go for twink looking types?
There's not a lot of them around here, but when I find them, have the confidence, and have a good reason to be in their general area yea.
Do you often hit on gay guys by accident?
What kind of bar? No boys there? What are your hobbies? Do you live alone? Are you like a bodybuilder or just a regular gym goer?
If they're getting suspicious it's because they are afraid you won't respect them if they submit and that lack of respect will lead you to leave them or cheat
you need to make it really clear that that won't happen. What aspects of gfd to they tend to find difficult? And which aspects interest you?
It might be an idea to go for bisexual guys, they tend to be more twinkish and ok with submission, when I met my ex I thought he was gay.
you are anonymous here: did your mom wear the pants in your family or was the father missing altogether? no judgement just curious
>>15185>>15183>If they're getting suspicious it's because they are afraid you won't respect them if they submit and that lack of respect will lead you to leave them or cheat. You need to make it really clear that that won't happen.
Maybe you're right… I should probably try to focus on nurturing trust so they're comfortable with it. Thank you anon.
What aspects of gfd do they tend to find difficult?
I've found they typically have trouble in trusting me to be in charge of them, in doing nice things for them, and in nurturing them.
>And which aspects interest you?
I'm interested in almost everything that involves being romantically dominant, but more specifically I'm interested in nurturing, comforting, and pampering subs.>>15185
Neither really. I argued with my dad whole lot if that means anything.
I'm glad I could help a little bit, I'm sure you can find some cute guy to nurture some day
Oh yes, the classic six foot two male model who's somehow so desperate for female attention he has to come to obscure woman only image boards, and then seek out the thread containing the loneliest of women on that board to beg them to talk to him. Displaying that he is either too stupid to read that men aren't allowed on the board to begin with, OR that he simply doesn't care about women's boundaries in the process.
Go away fucko, not your dating site.
It'll be tough. I've spent two years trying to convince my boyfriend he can cry in front of me, to no avail. Whenever he gets even the least bit teary eyed he turns into commander shephard and hits me with the>I should go.
I can't imagine how hard it would be get a guy to really commit to being submissive.
it's so weird to see crystal cafe so full of other people into gfd, considering we're such a minority.
I don't think I've ever met another girl into it IRL.
what's wrong with paying for meals out of genuine love? I could understand there are guys out there who forcefully buy you something you don't necessarily want/expect and then guilt you into accepting it and then later act like you owe them something for that (I've had experiences with these unfortunately); but what's wrong with him genuinely spoiling you?>>15206
I see 3 posters here ITT into that; on-top of a dedicated GFD thread (dno if it was created by the 3 posters mentioned)>>14845>>15157>>15177
I also find it curious, but each to their own.
Oh I wouldn't say I'm into gfd, I was mostly just saying guys seem to have a really
hard time even doing little things they consider "unmanly" let alone doing the exact opposite of what they've been told they should be doing.
I still don't really get what gfd is supposed to be. It sounds like just being a nice loving caring girlfriend. Don't most guys like that anyway?
I don't think that's what it means. My bf and I have a pretty reciprocal relationship, and it's definitely not gfd. I'm usually a little more foward about sex because he's pretty shy about it, but he still likes to pay for dinner and open doors for me.
I think another part of it is that a lot of girls into femdom in general seem to want a caricature of "normal" relationships but in reverse. Like with my I've never been subservient to him, nor him to me. We're a team, and it just so happens that I don't really have strong opinions unless it has to do with sex.
I think that's actually the problem with gfd. Guys who say they're into it mean something closer to what I described, as in reversa of normal relationships, but the girls seem to think that not wanting physical harm or humiliation is being "gentle".
I don't know who's actually right about the definition, but I think that's where the miscommunication is.
Also sorry for how rambly this got, I'm tired.
Seems like a form of pedophilia more than anything. Obsession with control, desire for young, weak, docile, innocent, submissive, etc., unhealthy unbalanced fetish-based relationship. Might as well look at hentai featuring shotacon and fantasise because at that point you don't really want a partner, you want a sexbot, a pet, or a child.
LMAO wanting to have a role-reversal relationship is pedophilia now. Amazing.
I just want to pay for everything, be the main breadwinner when the time comes, and be on top during sex 100% of the time (although going further would be great if he's into it). Are all men pedos now for wanting the same? Most straight men are into that role.
Even if you were to add on "ooh wanting to date a man smaller than you is pedophilia" again, most straight men want a gf shorter than they are. And small adults are still adults.
questionable though, as is DDLG.>>15213
I'm not sure what you're saying.>girls into femdom in general seem to want a caricature of "normal" relationships but in reverse>Guys who say they're into it mean something closer to what I described, as in reversal of normal relationships
Then…we want the same thing? Where's the miscommunication, aside from dommes accidentally running into non-subs?
pedophilia is sexual attraction to people who haven't fully hit sexual maturity yet. Nothing more.
I'm not one of these people posting about this stuff btw, but this is needlessly derogatory and a huge stretch.
What meant was that a normal relationship dynamic one partner isn't subservient to the other, you're partners and it just so happens that one of you is a little more passive and willing to go with the flow. Most of the time it's the girl. I suspect that most guys who say they're into gfd are mainly saying they're more laid back.
But then a lot of gfd girls want a relationship dynamic that would old fashioned if it was the other way around.
Like stay at home moms aren't really the norm anymore (no offense) so when guys say they want a gfd relationship, they don't mean they want to be stay at home husbands, but that's what a lot of gfd girls expect.
Oh, I see what you mean. Men aren't usually willing to go to the that extreme.
Although it is preferable to have majority dominance in a reverse-trad sort of way, I'd honestly be willing to settle with just being the more assertive party. Really anything as long as I'm not pushed into the passive role and definitely
not into being submissive at all in bed. I'd sooner kms.
I don't speak for all (gentle) dommes though.
I'm kind of ashamed to talk to my irl friends about it, so that's understandable, with the others I've met online, they seem to mostly feel the same.>>15207>but what's wrong with him genuinely spoiling you?
I mean, I like guys doing nice and sweet things for me, making food for me, drawings, etc. but I've always been uncomfortable with being spoiled with bought gifts, because I'm kind of competitive and always feel the need to earn the things I have on my own, without handouts from others.>>15224>so when guys say they want a gfd relationship, they don't mean they want to be stay at home husbands, but that's what a lot of gfd girls expect.
With the subs and doms I've talked to online at least, the expectation is the same with what >>15230
said about being the more assertive party and not being pushed into a passive role. The full reversal in the community is more of an unpractical ideal, rather than an expectation that most people have.
Yeah I get what you mean. But let me explain it using what you said to the other anon.>I just want to pay for everything, be the main breadwinner when the time comes, and be on top during sex 100% of the time (although going further would be great if he's into it). Are all men pedos now for wanting the same?
From talking to my boyfriend, my friends, and people in general, I know that that isn't the norm, well except for the breadwinner thing.
Guys don't want to pay for everything. They want to pay for dates, but they'll bitch for hours if you try to get them to buy you eyeliner.
It's highly subjective, but in my experience guys don't actually want to be on top 100% of the time. I vastly prefer cowgirl, and I've only had one partner complain. The rest were pretty happy to lay back for a while.
This last bit is also really subjective, but as far as I can tell a sizable portion of men aren't actually interested in "going further."
So that's what I meant by the "caricature" thing. You want to be more dominant than men do, and that's probably why you're running into so many problems.
Oh, I'm not the original anon who turns men off by being a domme. I can rarely even get a date, so I have to pass this level before attacking those issues haha. I'm still identifying what the problem is there. I have no idea what's wrong with me.
See, the thing with both the payment and sex thing is that I could never put up with a man paying for my meal or wanting to be on top at all, ever. Again, I'd sooner kms.
Also, is it true most men want to spank and choke their partners now? You seem to have experience. I want to feel angry and bad right now so don't withhold the truth.
I'm not >>15230
>You want to be more dominant than men do as far as I can tell a sizable portion of men aren't actually interested in "going further." So that's what I meant by the "caricature" thing.
The original thing I was asking for help with in >>15157
was not how to make normal men interested in gfd, or how to change myself to be better for them, or why I was having problems with normal men. I understand that being into gfd isn't normal, but also I understand what I want and need to be fulfilled in a romantic relationship. I just wanted ideas on how to find the men I was looking for among normal men.
Again, stuff like that can be kinda hard to figure out. It's just an anecdote, but a couple guys have tried that with me but none of them every brought it up again when I said I wasn't into that. Most of what I know about it comes from talking with my boyfriend, who I know isn't necessarily representative of anyone else. He was really hung up about it for a while, and I think he still is. Apparently he felt like he had to pretend to be into it because all of his exes were. I don't know how common that is, but he was pretty much convinced most women want to be spanked and choked by their partners, which is pretty sad to think about because he's a really gentle guy. My bet is that it's about the same for either gender.
Really just talk about it. I thought it would be a super awkward conversation to have, and it was at first, but it we were both relieved after.
I just want someone to spend time with and have a lot of sex. I’m in no position to do that rn until I fix myself up so I’m a little sad and lonely but hopeful at the same time…
>>15240>Apparently he felt like he had to pretend to be into it because all of his exes were
I feel like this happens with a lot of guys, they have 1 or 2 exes that like it and they think all women do.
Can you really blame them? It's not like girls don't make the same mistake, and stuff just adjacent to it is really normalized, like the whole daddy thing.
Wait so he's not a dom, but neither are you? Then what kind of stuff do you two even do?
Sounds like they're just vanilla and give and receive equally with no pain or power dynamic. People like that exist, you know.
Pretty much what >>15253
said, but it's not like all we do is missionary with the lights off for the sole purpose of procreation or anything. We still do plenty of fun stuff. He likes to tease me a lot and I'm almost always on top, although that's partially for 'mechanical' reasons. He'd probably split me in half (by accident) if I weren't in control on when it comes to penetrative stuff.
>>15254>I'm almost always on top, although that's partially for 'mechanical' reasons. He'd probably split me in half (by accident) if I weren't in control on when it comes to penetrative stuff.
Don't worry, I'm like you too! My friends told me its ok to not have any crush/not like any boys yet,I also have fantasies about the idea of falling in love haha
I saw a very tiny guy while walking to class at uni today. He must have been about 5'0".
I wish I could hold hands with someone so cute.
How big do my boobs need to be to get a bf with a big dick? Like is there a linear relationship or some kind of chart I could refer to?
All the people say is "SEX, BOOBS, DICKS, ABS"
I just want a guy to watch movies and go-to the beach and build sandcastles with
If I've been approached by a man am I no longer a femcel?
It happened today but he just wasn't the small subby boy of my dreams and in the end revealed he only wanted a hookup anyway. Plus some other red flags (not listening to a word I said).
Am I just picky now? Can I still post itt?
Well if femcel implies incel, then yeah I guess you're no longer a femcel. If he wasn't bf material and was just looking for sex then I wouldn't say you're just being picky. At least you know you're no longer hopeless.
Have you considered approaching boys you might be interested in?
I guess I've ascended…sort of.>>15584
I have but they reject me.
Men of my specific type don't like me it seems. But I don't want to date someone I'm not attracted to since that's mean.
And he even said he was poly which is a big no.
If you want serious relationship and he didn't, then it was completely fine to reject him.
anon is wrong
Be willing to compromise for a relationship, but don't force yourself into a relationship you know you won't be happy with.
I don't really know what the term femcel means, I assume it's just female incel.
I think you still are femcel, I think most people who are celibate are involuntarily so. I'm sure you have a desire for a bf, and you want to have sex and all that stuff, but it needs to be under the condition that it's someone you can love. The dilemma I face is that there's no one suitable around me, I don't care much for looks but it seems like so many guys are just looking for hookups.
Today I dreamed that some man I had never met before sent me a message that he liked me and wanted me to be his gf and I thought "wow I gotta post this to crystal.cafe"
I dont get the point of having a boyfriend. Youll have to spend your time and energy just for some guy that will eventually become annoying once the horomones turn off. It may be just me but i cannot stand the idea of talking or being around someone more than i have to especially dating where i would have to talk to them every day. I cant see anything better than being alone.
>just want a cute bf to hump every few days who leaves me the heck alone for the majority of the time.
Anon… there are a lot of guys whose idea of a relationship mirrors yours. They just want to fuck and hate clinginess. Good luck.
I've met someone who fits what I'd want in a partner personality-wise almost eerily well. And he seems to like me as a person a lot.
But there are a few issues.
For one he's giving me mixed signals about if he wants to just be friends or not. Just…very confusing.
And for another, on social media he's blatantly following softcore porn accounts which skeeves me out. Not even a prude, whacking it to some rando's selfies is fine (I do it myself) but letting the world know about it is off to me.
And from what I can tell he has self-destructive tendencies.
Good end is that he just wants friendship and I won't have to make any decisions, I guess. Or already has a girlfriend that I haven't found on his socials. Although I'd probably cut him off due to the mixed signals; not interested in relationship drama.
But overall I just wish he didn't have red flags, because he's quite sweet. This seems to be exactly how girls get into toxic relationships though and I want to avoid that.
>>15636>>15636>and I thought "wow I gotta post this to crystal.cafe"
If by glancing at their social media I can tell they are fapping to all this porn then that's a bad fucking sign, it's gross and completely socially ignorant.
Yeah, I considered it a sign that he may have a porn addiction and I'm not getting on that train. Not romantically.
He seems respectful though and hasn't done anything gross despite having several chances to make dirty jokes. So I'll stay his friend for now.
Does feel bad though. Men I like either disappoint me or I disappoint them.
Free me pls.
I agree. However we live in a weird generation. As long as its not brazzers I wouldn't be to worried about it.
Have you tried meeting people online in a casual way? Like discord servers, games with a heavy social factor, imageboards/forums featuring group activies? I'm generally surprised to see this mentioned so rarely
What's even the deal with that? I've never actually watched it.
it encourages men's kung-fu fantasies (nsfw)
I guess, although it's also obvious from the accounts he's following that he's into daddy dom shit and I'm a domme myself so it could never work. Even if I got over the fact that he has no shame in having his mom potentially see what porn he likes lol.
>>15766>he's into daddy dom shit
You made the right choice. He has terrible taste.
If only he was looking for a mommy gf like I assumed from his personality.
Still terrible taste.
>>15766>I'm a domme
are you that one anon all over the boards and chans crying about not having a sub bf?
they are really really rare so you have to put thrice the effort into finding him than shitposting on CC
I'm pretty sure there's just a lot of them on here now.
Are there any other ugly girls who feel really guilty about asking men out? Since starting uni I've met few boys who seem to like talking to me. I want to ask one of them out, but I know I am really ugly, so maybe it would upset him? I've read many stories about men being devasted because someone who is not attractive confessed to them. I really don't want to crush that guy's confidence by doing that.
it will sound really mean, but please don't. if you have an ugly face it's better to wait and avoid ridicule. i am also ugly and i learned it the hard way.
Thank you for your kindness, anon! It really means a lot, I teared up a little. I hope you will have a wonderful day.>>15776
Thank you for your honesty, I appreciate it more than anything. You are probably right, I won't try. It will only make him uncomfortable. Do you mind me asking about your experiences?
I’m also ugly and I’ve also tried asking out men before, and if you’re ugly it’s just a bad idea. You’ll only feel worse about yourself when you realize how men view ugly women.
If you dont mind me asking, but when you asked men out were you around school-age/teenage years?
What if the man is maybe a bit uglier than you? The one I want to ask out has an ugly face (so do I), he is also obese and has some acne (his acne looks pretty cute though to be honest). I can't give up just yet.
i have asked quite a few men out during my mid twenties, my self-esteem was too low for that when i was a teen.>>15781
if you have a masculine ugly face, unfortunately not. i am sorry anon. you sound lovely. i am really sorry again. just please don't do that.
I thought boys were only mean in their teens
kek there are definitely multiple of us.
There are at least
three distinct ones on this small site I've noticed, probably more. Chans draw weirdos after all.
And I am trying! I'm active and approach boys that catch my eye, I'll keep trying.
Perhaps have an actual relationship and not base their existence on obsessive sexual festishism?
…oh no sister. Do I have news for you.
Thats a pretty big fetish. Daddy dom fetishes are extremely popular with younger guys. IT really all depends on how you feel about flaunting sexuality.
Im a little suprised a DOM even cares. are you sure you're a dom?
I know it is, most men are doms and most women are subs. I get that I'm the "abnormal" one. (kms)
Although I do have a strategy of only asking out physically smaller men, given that if they agree to date a girl who can overpower them they will be more likely to be passive in bed. Not absolutely, but a bit more likely since they enjoy being countercultural in other aspects of the relationship too. Also they're fucking adorable.
tbf this guy was also an anomaly since we mutually befriended each other during a class activity and he's taller than me. He just comes off as soft, sensitive, and borderline cutesy in his messages so it was strange to find out he wants to dom women lmao.>are you sure you're a domme if you don't want your mother and possibly future employers finding out about your fetishes?
I'm open about it with my friends, but having it plastered all over social media (with my name attached…I do actually have art accounts that suggest my interests) is too far for me. Pretty cringe.
What about that post is robot-ish?
You probably won't believe it, but I think guys want relationships more than girls do. Seriously, a lot of my friends are happy to be single, but I don't know any guys that havr said the same.
Sorry, the point of all that was guys are lonely and eventually some of them get mean as a result.
Why'd the >tfw no feminization bf thread get deleted?
The OP might have been a raider from elsewhere once the IP was checked.
Or mods don't like this kind of talk.
Eh, I'm sure I'll have another opportunity to kinkshame.
Personally it wasn't even a kink or sexual. I just want to cuddle one.
That sounds distinctly sexual.
Have you ever platonically cuddled a friend or heard of it? There's nothing kinky about it.
People cuddle their children…
What about asexuals who still enjoy some close contact without wanting sex? I can hug my dog, pillow or another person and simply want to do just that, anon. Take your horny mind googles off.
Straight friends cuddle. I'm sure straight men would cuddle each other if there wasn't social pressure not to.
You clearly do not understand men.
This, men don't feel affection.
Ok, that's not true, but I've spent a lot of time trying to understand males, and their friendships are definitely way different. It wouldn't be that far fetched to say they don't feel platonic
Most men, at least outside of the USA, can be quite physically intimate and affectionate with each-other but it's not something they do easily. It comes after a lot of bonding and working together. You probably just haven't seen good male friends acting naturally before, in a situation that allows it. Also, the social pressure does make it a lot harder. Another thing these days is everyone being quick to label men gay if they do that, usually gleefully but wrongly all the same. It's pretty hard for straight men to be so affectionate with each-other in some societies when it's considered impossible and gay by default.
Pic: Pakistan-China border.
those men are clearly fake, anon
they kissed right after this pic was taken
is it weird to want a virgin kissless bf so you experience all your firsts together? im 21 and giving up hope any my age exist, idk i just want to simultaneously share these first experiences…
Same desire, anon, and same age.
Just go after 18-year-old awkward looking/acting guys and the probability will increase tbh.
Plenty of them online. Not even in a sarcastic sense; there's great girls above 20 who've never had a romantic partner online, why wouldn't there be great guys above 20 who are the same? If anything the latter would be more common, because internet demographic, variety in sexual partners, etc.
tbh anon i posted this after finding out the cute 19 yr old i started talking to had had 6 gfs before already, really bummed me out aha, he was kinda awkward AND younger so i was so sure this time aha, he was super cute though i shouldve known better ahaha…
You're gonna have a hard time since guys never want to admit that they're virgins.
Yeah, even some awkward guys are still socially successful with other awkward people. Either because of looks or just being amiable.
But I do agree with >>15908
in that there are probably more adult male virgins than women.
It doesn't have to be awkwardness, might as well just be a heavy case of being introverted.
Nobody believes a guy who says he wants to be single anyways. They'll just accuse him of lying because he can't get a girle. So why bother saying it.
good rule of thumb. if your in 10 meters of another human bean smile at them. once you get within 5 meters or so say "hello/good day/cheers" and you'll be surprised how something as easy as that will make you appear more approachable. when people begin approaching you with technique A then begin talking to them and being generally sociable try your best not to lead on orbiters though.
ok link that bread I'm genuinely curious since you've been so passive aggressive about it.
how old are you and what's your living condition like? if you are over 18 and live anywhere near people like not the boonies in michigan you can go out and get into a terrible relationship ezpz. it would be preferable that you go up and talk to a guy first and ask if they want to hang out. otherwise males between 14-mid 20s are completely strung out on testosterone and compelled to fuck and want to fuck. so for a surefire toxic relationship you could bait a guy into wanting you for fuck and never fuck but that is the cycle which creates incel misogynists.
go out and talk to people maybe try speed dating.
young men are addled by testosterone so depending on your and their age anywhere between 3-5 times a week. as guys get older their libido wanes but younger guys would absolutely fuck 4 times a day if they could find a willing partner.
based and pokepilled>>14886
bitch he has 4 hands that's like 20 dicks so what if they don't shoot confetti
no talking out issues is legit. the process is root cause analysis. find out what caused social anxiety and abandonment issue face it and then grow from mistakes within environments where there are no stakes at hand for failure.
I would argue no under these circumstances>>15623>I don't really know what the term femcel means, I assume it's just female incel.
A woman can only be voluntarily celibate unless they are asexual i.e. desire no sexual contact of any sort or are physically/mentally disabled like missing limbs permanently vegetative or tard brained. As a woman you could quite literally go up to any guy 7/10 or below and get a one night stand. Very few young guys would say no to that. Unless you were like in a hobo costume covered in body hair and a complete tumblrina landwhale in a dumpster. Even then dudes would still be like "dude she wants to smash" 'your gonna smash dumpster pussy?' "SHE WANTS TO SMASH DUDE IM GETTIN IT IN!"
it may be more of a social reluctance than anything else since you do have people approaching you and therefore opportunities to engage in sexual relations.
this is what booty calls and one night stands are for. as a woman you can achieve this if you give your number to a guy. HE WILL CALL YOU at some point maybe sober but more probably while drunk looking to get laid in desperation of a stacy turning him down.
can you elaborate a bit more? you might be over reading into something. alternatively have you ever expressed to him that you may want to be in a steady relation ship possibly with him?
whats wrong with brazzers it's campy porn for a lol and fap. there are much worse things a guy could be vocally masturbating to.
it really depends on the guy. if its a total chad then don't bother but if its just some fucking guy they would probably be really embarrassed if in a group or give it a shot. I would think asking them when they aren't with a group of friends would be a better strategy and then getting their number or asking them to give them yours so they actually ring through to your phone.
never heard of a brodown hoedown or brojobs or "a night of super smash bros">>15890
guys friendships are all about ragging on each other, cracking wise, or competing or any combination there of.
>>15944>guys friendships are all about ragging on each other, cracking wise, or competing or any combination there of.
are males the master-race?
>>15944>never heard of a brodown hoedown or brojobs or "a night of super smash bros"
I don't think those jokes are meant to be taken literally
i pity them they are like incomplete beings. i dont know if they lack the energy or the ability to speak and act like women do with one another. ive seen healthy relationships that guys went into with freinds of mine and they suddenly became like actual three dimensional people. capable of coherent conversation and being thoughtful or reasonable. when they get together among themselves though its like someone flips the switch to begin retardfest.
I mean, you could, my friend does that and got her current bf that way, she got rejected once though. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.
First he told be that he's literally been wanting to talk to me for a month (we share a class), which would be fine since I've done the same before, but he also calls me cute a lot, sends heart emojis, and calls me "love." When I asked if this is just how he is with friends he said "yeah I guess if I had friends I would be." (He has no friends, truly lol)
It could be a cultural thing? He's South Asian and I've seen people on another SA friend's instagram sending each other hearts regardless of gender and relationship. Not to sound ignorant, but is that common, SA anons?
And in terms of respect, he's asked about my interests and remembered things that I said. And he's had chances to make dirty jokes or turn the conversation sexual but didn't. I even tried to bait him into talking about his daddy kink after he brought up Lana Del Ray but he didn't bite. Perhaps because the tone I took was disapproving of it but…you know.
I have not expressed interest in him that way, although it has come up that I'm single and bitter lol. And he didn't comment on that.
What do you think?
NTA but>>15956>And in terms of respect, he's asked about my interests and remembered things that I said.
He wants to marry you
hush the frick up goober>>15956
anon look talk to him about relationships if he's in one if he'd like to be in one. you might find that both of you have been pining for one another on one level or another and just too scared to ruin what currently exists. if it works out YAY im happy for both of you, if it doesn't no harm no foul you can cool the situation and go back to being friends.
i don't know about south asia but in south america they are similarly very much more open and endearing with one another.
Males who remember things you say and who arent taking your food order all want to marry you.
Every other male who doesn’t want to marry you forgets what you say.
I would normally, but like I mentioned earlier we're evidentally very sexually incompatible. And I just can't deal with that.
It's disappointing because he would be pretty perfect otherwise. So close yet so far…>>15961>>15965
I mean, I have another male friend who does that and definitely
doesn't like me romantically. But I'd agree they are few and far between.
Maybe fooling around with a competing subtext is a better way of both having fun, improving as a person and gaining insight into others. What makes their approach inferior?
Last vent about this issue unless anyone else has any analysis or advice.
It's still a sad situation that I'm not going to change at all, but I'm taking a positive out of it. The fact that one guy out there has the personality I like (sensitive, crybaby-ish, clingy, interested in home-y things like cooking and sewing, cares about his presentation, etc.) means that many more may exist. There's hope for me to find a cute (sub or vanilla) bf like this.
Seeing his cute face was hard today though. Hopefully it will get easier and I can forget about this mess.
What I've learned is that rejecting a boyfriend when they would like to have sex with you is like rejecting them in general. Guys are wired like that.
Would be nice if they would at least try to get a romantic mood going first rather then just try to jump into it.
If you are looking for a guy who won't have sex and just cuddle look no further than extreme Catholic guys and ones who've practised spiritual celibacy.
>take the bus daily
>decide to take a creepshot of a qt who regularly takes the same bus while we're waiting
>later on the bus, he catches me staring at him
>see…something…grow in his pants
So, is this true love?
But seriously, should I make small talk with him some time? How to start that?
The dick doesn't lie.
Pretty sure he starts a work term of some sort next semester since I saw him in a suit two weeks ago, so I only have a few weeks to make a move.
How the hell did you see his pants grow slightly?
I fell in love with someone who I met through 4chan, he has everything that I want in someone, I think he's perfect but he told me that he only would date a virgin girl and I'm not.
I don't know what to do because when I say that has everything that I want in someone it's true. I feel that everything is falling into pieces right now.
Poor soul. All other girls take this as a warning!
This is why virginity is precious. Don't ever waste it.
Losing your virginity before marriage instantly puts you in the category of fornicator. From then on you are then only restricted to sex relations with other fornicators or very desperate men. Not quite the substance for a healthy relationship or family, is it? True marriage is the privilege of virgins.
Perhaps you can spread the word to as many other girls as possible. Helping them remain chaste with a high level of temperance, to keep them from making the same mistake you did.
Since family being no longer a good option, I would strive to live a life of devotion and purity from then on.
can't you just lie? it's not like there's a 100% to tell.
I am a virgin myself and I also like the fact that my boyfriend is inexperienced. But if a guy is obsessed with female virginity like this disgusting robot >>16213
he is not worth your time anyway. I am sorry anon, I am sure you will find someone better!
I hope you're all joking. If he's a virgin himself, he can very well "demand" his future girlfriend to be a virgin as well.
Hardly if he chooses devout religious girls.
Think traditional Catholicism duh..
I wouldn't say so. There are more virgins over 18 than you realize and it's not just religious girls.
If he likes you enough he might change his mind, best to be honest with him either way though.
i was 19 when i lost my virginity, and i have to say that being a virgin was a huge deterrent to dating anyone before that time. when guys found out i'd never had sex, they assumed i was one of those religious girls who would make this huge deal about 'we had sex therefore we're bonded for life henceforth' and no
guy in an appropriate age range for me at the time was at a point in their life to consider settling down and making that commitment, they all wanted to complete college and start their careers before ever thinking about getting hitched. but the older you get, the 'weirder' it is to be a virgin, so I'm glad I lost mine before I hit my twenties.
i went to a traditional catholic school and we literally had a girl there who claimed she had fucked a guy on the altar after school (it was kept behind curtains back-stage when not in use for mass)
she wasn't even the most promiscuous girl in my year tbh.
but sure, specific religious beliefs = infallibility of character
There is a difference between ‘I attended a school with x values’ & ‘I, personally, hold and adhere to X values.’
I went to a Catholic uni and most students weren’t Catholic.
That doesn’t mean the nuns weren’t devout Catholics.
>>16278>Needs to conform to what everyone else believes at the moment.
It seems all you wanted was sex and not a long term stable relationship. Clearly, there are high quality guys on the internet who care about this sort of thing who would be more than willing to make a commitment and sometime in the future fly out to marry. Perhaps we didn't evolve to fuck random people, but instead pair bond with one person for life. Each sexual partner reduces the ability to pair bond significantly until there is nothing left. There are more than enough studies that back up this point.
I hope this is true, ideally I just want to date and marry one guy but I'm so afraid they'll be like other anon described. That no men want to settle down when they're young and just whore themselves around to 20+ women before they decide to become a husband…then they cheat on their wife.
I feel like no one wants that anymore. I just want a cute small husband who is also very serious about me. Why don't men feel love?
non-promiscuous men, or just in general men who are not obsessed with sex and sex only are really hard to find, but please don't give up, anon! the harsh truth is: you have to look for them yourself, since truly valuable boys are often shy.
Oh, I definitely do that! I figure I have to since I do have a preference for short men and I know they struggle with confidence. I'm always the initiator, although so far the one date I got turned out to be a party boy despite seeming like a band geek.
I won't give up since it's the thing I want most in life. I hope you're right.
My big brother tells the other story:
He started uni at 16, graduated at 19, and works hard to make a living, all to marry young.
He’s 22, tall, blue-eyed, in shape, smart, has money, dances, etc.
Girls our age?
“I need my degree and a career first, no time for that” (then cries to me about hookups taking her cash)
I feel like my family is an island
>>16361>“I need my degree and a career first, no time for that” (then cries to me about hookups taking her cash)
Normally I would say it's a reasonable mindset to have, but if it's the case of hookups and stuff like this, isn't it cheating? It sounds like she uses it as an excuse to avoid commitment, idk how to make it sound less offensive but yeah… you know what I mean.
>cute manlet (about 5'2") works at fry shop in my uni cafeteria
>last time I went he made small talk and was stretching a bit in front of me, got kind of embarrassed when I saw
>considering making a move
>but the fries are good and I'd have to avoid the shop if he rejected me
>hit on a cashier before and it was a big miss steak
But I might ask for his name next time, anyway. And what he's majoring in (assuming he's attending this uni).
I have a friend who talked every single day to some guy on the internet halfway across the world for 10 solid years. They have perfectly identical personalities, interests, etc. They can literally finish each other's sentences at will! Now she's living with him, happily married.
Witnessing this, I don't think any girl should settle for less.
how do you hit on a cashier anon?
Thats cute, do you know where they met?
Last time I just asked if he was single. He looked a bit frightened, gave me a look of disgust, and then said "no."
Could have been worse, but my ability to go to that shop was ruined. Which is the tragic part.
Girls, fuck it. I am going to try my best to get a cute, kind, weebish bf THIS YEAR. No more excuses. I will finally ask someone out! Please wish me luck.
>>16575>about a month left in the year
>started talking to a guy from tinder (he's a lot older than me but is a good guy…really ideal)
>we've been talking for a little over 2 weeks and he hasn't asked me to see him or anything (i think he tested the waters tho and hinted to it)
>after one week he asked for raunchy pix when i accidentally texted him at like 1am and i said no not rn so our convos never got saucy again
>we had fun conversations and he seemed interested in me at first but not so much anymore
>i think he's annoyed by me bc of the age difference and maybe just wanted to talk before smashing
gif is me to myself for being in my feels about this lol
What did you expect?
>>16577> a guy much older than you> tinder
Gurl, he didn't want anything but an easy booty call.
Love u for using a Ramona gif lol
i'm boo boo the fool obviously lol
& yes!!! the airhead queen
So, another nice boy at my uni turned out to be gay. I appreciate the fact that he trusted me enough to tell me about that (I live in a conservative country), and I feel awful for saying that, but it made me sad. It's a shame that almost every soft, kind boy I met irl is gay.
I'm too fat and gross to have a boyfriend. I can barely take care of my hygiene or get out of the house most days and then I look at my dream celebrity crush and realize how far I am from ever even being on anyone's radar, let alone his. Is it weird to use a celebrity crush as motivation for wanting to get fit? At this point, I feel like anything as motivation is good.
>tfw no ugly cute scrawny bf who sends you feet pics every morning
It's probably just that straight boys feel like they have to be tough guys, because your country is so conservative.
Why do you want feet pics from a Boi? iugh
Feets are cute. Especially in colorful socks.
How's it feel knowing you're attracted to feet because of a literal brain deformity?
Why do people group foot fetishists with BDSM and other degeneracy? What makes liking innocent feet so repulsive? Feet can be cute, clean, and soft. They are nice to hold. Also, it's not really a brain deformity, it has more to do with the nerves of your feet being near the nerves of your genitals, iirc.
It has to do with a deformity in your somatosensory homunculus that makes connections between feet and genitals that shouldn't be there. It's a disease.
How is it so wrong to like your partner's body? I also like male tummies, hands, ribs, collarbones, etc. Is that wrong? Am I degenerate for fetishizing the male body?
Regardless, even if it is a brain issue it's not like I can change it. And it hurts no one.
>fetishizing the innocent
feet aren't actual children or animals, tf
it's just a cute body part
why the fuck not, if it's in private. i'm just scared people will judge me for liking sOme feetsies
Please dont fetish shame kinks that are relatively inocent.
This is a nice thread.
Alright, it's a picture of a slice of your brain. In this particular slice there are regions that represent different parts of the human body, notice how the regions for feet and genitals are right next to each other. In people who like feet, there are some wires crossed connecting feet and genitals, making them view feet as sexual.>>16765
It's weird and I enjoy picking on you people. Is that so hard to grasp?
Lips are pretty sexual by default. I'm pretty sure lips evolved specifically to look like vaginas, so men have an excuse, and I guess the fact that they have lips too would imply we're in the clear to like them as well.
>>16771>lips evolved specifically to look like vaginas
>>16771>these mental gymnastics
I love how we have anons who want have a fetish for
consensually eating their boyfriends alive, but you pick on the foot fetish anons instead.
Hey, lips didn't come first, and they don't really have a purpose.>>16774
Less than it takes to convince yourself feet are sexy.
>>16777>Less than it takes to convince yourself feet are sexy
but you just said it was an inherent deformity, so it doesn't take anything to convince me that feet are sexy
I'm saying I don't think there's a short circuit for lips, I'm saying that it's by design. Lips are meant
to be sexy, feet are not.but don't you dare question me about why I like hands>>16775
Vore is pretty weird too, but they haven't found a physical brain defect that causes it, so it's less fun to make fun of them. Plus they (seem) to be less intrusive about it. I like to make fun of foot fetishists almost as much as they like to insert their fetish into conversations.
Are you trying to imply my senseless tirade against a harmless fetish may not be entirely coherent?
so it's more fun to make fun of someone who can't help it that they are degenerate because of genetics than it is to make fun of people who are degenerate of their own accord, and don't have a real reason to be like that ? ok whatever you say kira yoshikage
I told you not to question that.
Is it really of their own accord, or are they a product of their genetics and environment? Does free will exist? Are we ever truly responsible for our actions? These are the questions that keep me up at night.
Hands are legitimately disgusting. They touch everything and have countless germs on them. If you consistently wear shoes and socks, your feet are pure and soft to cuddle.
>>16769>>16779>tfw no ugly cute bf who sends you feet pics every morning AND an anon on crystal cafe makes fun of your harmless fetish despite having one herself.
Also watch out with that hand fetish. I didn't always like feet, it progressed from a hand fixation in high school.
do you never wash your hands?
Hands are washed dozens of times a day while feet bathe in their own sweat all day confined in socks and shoes. I'll take hands over feet any day
Most of you seem to have had sex and relationships before. Nearly every boy on incels.is and 4chan is a virgin.
Is CC a place for average girls or is it like incels.is/4chan?
Foot fetish anon here. I'm a virgin and unable to hold a man's hand.
I think there's a bigger concentration of "femcels" here than on lolcow for example.
No, and that's even sadder.
Someone make this a banner.
>>16792>4chan is a virgin
What? Do you even go on 4chan? Most of them are quite normal people.
>>16826>Being a virgin makes you abnormal.
So can we be done with all the >tfw no qt short bf threads? Just go on /a/ and pick one. They're a bunch of short skinny virgins who (allegedly) don't act the same in real life. Snap one up before they decide to go on /r9k/.
Most guys there have unrealistic standards and prefer 2D anyway. Besides, it is quite tough to contactfag there.I want short /a/ bf so much it huurtss
I thought the 2D>3D thing was just a meme. Surely no one actually believes that cartoons are better than real people, r-right?
There are guys on there that say that but I think that it’s a coping mechanism (actual coping, not meme coping). They’re lonely but they feel that they can’t do anything about it so they try to convince themselves that having an imaginary relationship with a girl that doesn’t exist is actually superior to a real relationship.
In reality most of the guys that say 2D>3D would fall for the first girl that gives them any kind of positive attention.
So this is my thought process: if most of the posters on /a/ are short but not fat, and virgins who only act misogynistic on there the same way we shitpost about killing all men, how hard could it be to sort through them until you find a decent one that's to your liking? Just use a throwaway discord until you get to know them and you're golden.
These threads always devolve into self pity, and no one actually outlines what type of boy they want, how they would try to acquire him, what to do etc. or ask for advice on where to find boys like that.
What's even the point? Like, OK, - no bf. Fine. And yeah, saying "tfw no bf" makes you feel good in a bad way because you pity yourself, but then what? It's just so tedious.
It doesn't matter if it's a "meme" or "banter". Being mean to women and saying nasty things about us purely because "everyone else is doing it" or "board culture" is shitty behaviour and instantly scores you off in my book. These idiots like to claim they're superior to other boys and that they're really sensitive and emotional, but how is this shit any different from the morons on the football or rugby team who go out to pubs and basically rape women?
I'm gonna go with the fact that they're just babbling and not actually raping anyone. Besides, they're no different than the "men are the root of all evil" posters here.
>>16872>sides, they're no different than the "men are the root of all evil" posters here
Please go away. There is literally zero harm in me saying "men are pigs" or other posters saying men are terrible (which they really are by the way). No one here is going to get in a truck and run down a frat house, or go around raping and killing men.
Meanwhile, those idiots who say "lol women are *
*" or whatever stuff they want to say actually DO pose a threat. They can pretend it's all "memes" or "culture", but they do it so much that they end up believing it, and then what do you get? Awful people like that Canadian guy who killed those people.
There's literally zero harm in saying "women are evil" either. There is only harm in actually doing harm, but I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that most /a/ users aren't violent. In fact I bet if you were to compare them to the general population they'd actually be less violent. They're a bunch of lonely teenagers.
>>16878>There's literally zero harm in saying "women are evil" either.
Who hurt you? Dad, step-dad, or boyfriend. I hope you can recover and have a happy and healthy relationship with men
>it's somehow not misogyny if he kills men too
Man you are a dumbass
NTA, but don't you find it strange that some psychopath who guns down bunch of people is known as MISOGYNIST WOMAN KILLER even though both men and women died? It reminds me of the gag news title "Meteor Hits Earth, Women Most Affected".
>>16875>There is literally zero harm in me saying "men are pigs" or other posters saying men are terrible
How do you think suicidal and otherwise kicked down men feel when they see that? Zero harm my ass. Grow up.
You're taking this too much at a surface level. Just because someone hates women doesn't mean they can't hate/kill others. Hitler hate Jews, but he killed gorillions of others who weren't Jews. Likewise, Rodger was just a pathetic hateful person in general. He hated full Asians and killed his three Chinese roommates/"""friends""". Two of his girl kills were from specific targeting, and his fourth boy kill was random hateful indiscriminate shooting.
But that still doesn't change that Elliot Rodger shot twice as many men as he shot women. It doesn't mean the women he shot are any less victims because there was less of them, but to me it's very concerning how the women he murdered get singled out because of his fucked up views. Why can't they just be victims? Why must they be gender segregated for political reasons? Same mindset bothers me when nazis and anti-semitism are brought up, as if the non-jewish people who got crushed by nazis are secondary in the great oppression ladder because (insert meme about six million). It sickens and saddens me how people use their bodies as soapboxes, might as well use their bodies as marionettes to speak for their cause.
Because if you ever bothered to learn anything about his hateful ideology it all stemmed from his misogyny. He hated and killed "normalfags" because >tfw no gf. For example, his hatred of Asians stemmed from the fact he felt inferior to whites because of his mixed race.
i dont think men see her "men are pigs" posts here
Anonymous Moderator 17037
Don't derail the thread, please.
Well maybe they shouldn't be on this site to begin with.
What's even worse is some of these people are so used to being abused that they feel uncomfortable if someone is kind to them in a relationship, then they leave that person and go back to finding someone to abuse them. Some people just hate themselves, I guess.
Unfortunately for most the feeling of being lonely is worse than the abuse. Also many don't realize that there is going to be abuse when they enter into the relationship, either the person is oblivious to the situation or the other person is deceptive enough to fool them.>>17192
Another unfortunate thing is negative reinforcement(abuse) is pretty much just as much of a powerful motivator as positive reinforcement. If some one is abused enough it becomes a necessary part of their ability to function. If that makes sense…
It's not fine to be evil even if you do it secretly. Unbelievable. I sincerely hope you're trolling or just kids still in their boy cootie phase, because that's absolutely pathetic.
>>14789>Download Okcupid to see if I get any better luck than tinder>Enjoy the platform, nice Q&A format although it seems to encourage oversharing of personal info>Turns out the userbase is both small and on average really low quality, nearly 1/3 profiles mention anime and video games in the description>Also lets paid users see read receipts and online status, no way to disable that from my end
Overall 4/10 needs more quality people
You won't find "quality people" on okcupid, tinder, that fish one, etc etc.
It's not too hard to meet shy dorky boys on discord. A while after meeting in an anime server my bf asked me out, plus he's sweet and into gfd. But maybe I got lucky and everyone else in the server was an asshole, who knows.
Unfortunately you're probably right and online dating apps isn't an ideal format, 90% of the people on there are solely searching for hookups specifically. I've only had success coming across strangers and having conversations for a while, which lead to having successful relationships/dates. But I don't think you're being very fair when you say it needs more quality people. You really should only need one quality person and just like any other format should take some effort in finding them.
And what, by chance, makes you so high quality that you believe you deserve so much better?
Those guys are probably sharing that because they want to find their anime gamer-gurl soulmate.
What's wrong with anime and video games? It doesn't mean they're bad people.
I am so hopeless, there are lots of boys at college I don't know yet but wish I could know and therefore every 2 days I have a crush on a different guy.
Yesterday I just got a crush on my friend's friend because he is tall and cute and he was quite nice to me and in my mind if someone is nice to me it MUST BE because they like me so now I like him. wtf I don't even know him
Them being nice towards you means they like you. Now you must do your thing and show you like them back. Maybe you both will like each other in actual like-like way that truly matters.
aww, that sounds so cute. Thank you anon. I feel like a child that I have to be told this.
I want to throw out this second opinion just because you might be getting your hopes up way too much here. You act nice to people too right? But it doesn't mean you like them, it just means you are trying to be pleasant and a nice person.
Acting nice to a total stranger isn't really a big tell sign that they like you, I don't meet many strangers in public who go out of their way to be rude assholes. Go into this stuff with a guarded approach in case you get your hopes up way too high for something that has a 80% chance of not being there.
Go for it or you'll beat yourself up later. Find an isolated moment and talk to him about literally anything.
Yes, and people are polite towards people they like.
Someone being polite towards you is a green flag by itself. If he didn't like you or care about you at all he would be full neutral. Being polite means he's open fur human contact, which is a green flag, and means you are in good position to attempt deeper contact.
And also to everyone, assuming they're a remotely decent human being.
Or are you saying you go through life acting like an asshole to everyone you meet EXCEPT hot people you want to fuck?
You are living in a fantasy land if you think being polite in a group social setting of friends of friends is now a green flag that you should hit on someone you don't even know. Being polite is just being a good person, you can be polite and have ZERO interest with actually interacting with a person on more than a superficial level of shallow conversing with friends and strangers.
nta but it wouldn't be harmful to hit on someone, especially men since we're of no physical threat to them (assuming anon isn't a big strongk woman and he isn't a little frail man).
You're acting like it would be a crime if he isn't showing clear green flags. Good grief. The only one who could possibly be hurt here is anon and let's be real, we all have to (wo)man up and swallow some rejections in our lives. It's good for you, thickens the skin.
Hah, I find it amusing that my stupid comment actually started a discussion. I didn't know I had that power.
But I am exceptionally shy so I don't think I will ever be able to flirt with someone. I don't think I would want to anyway. I will try that trick that some anon posted about here which is just staring shamelessly at him. it sounds doable, thanks anon.
Also when I said he was nice to me, it was because I think I heard him say something like "oh it's that girl from before" which means he remembered me. Also I lent him a pencil and paper and he was all cutely apologetic when he returned them. Or maybe I am just projecting my fondness of him on his behavior and interpreting it as something it's not.
Red flag for childish and immature personality.
Just the fact that they did put it in their bio is more of a red flag than that they actually watch anime and play video games.
>It doesn't mean they're bad people.
Would be fine if you were just looking for new friends.
I think it depends how they word it, it's a difference between saying "I like video games and [other stuff]" and something like "gamer here".on the other hand I understand because I dislike male nerds too
Well to me guys that define their hobbies and interests as video games tend to lack the adventurous and exciting qualities? Does that make any sense?
Like if someone chooses to stay in and play video games and live life in front of a screen that says a lot about their peresonality
i would love a man who lives in the real world not in anime and playstation
What do you define as exciting qualities, genuinely curious as someone who prefers nerd types.
>>17308>Well to me guys that define their hobbies and interests as video games tend to lack the adventurous and exciting qualities? Does that make any sense?
Not really. Video games simulate adventures and are exciting.
>i would love a man who lives in the real world
The real world is not adventurous and exciting.
I don't think there's a problem in putting stuff like that in your bio. Shared interests can be an important part of a relationship, so it's quite natural to put it in there and potentially seek those with similar interests. It is much better if you have something you can enjoy doing together without the other person having to force themselves and feign interest. And I would say that the vast majority of people have similar passive interests, whether it is watching TV or spending 5 hours a day on social media.
Do you also like outside activities, anon? Suspicious since we're on an imageboard here.
Or are you after a manic pixie dream boy to show you the beauty of living life on the edge? I commend that swap of roles.
you met your bf on discord?
how far away does he live? is that a LTR ?
I like image board culture after an ex bf showed me the chans
I mainly post on hispachan and this
And yes i have outdoor hobbies, i enjoy surfing (lucky to live in one of the most beautiful beaches in the world), hiking, and ive played soccer and softball on and off
Its just something wrong to me when a guy I meet would rather sit in and torrent a movie than go out and enjoy the sun or a cold walk on the sand
does that make any sense?>>17309
adventurous, isn't afraid to take risks or talk to others, is genuinely nice and caring , but at the same time the kind of person who doesn't take shit from anybody? isn't afraid to stand up for himself or for others
exciting is a relevant term, i don't necesarily want some guy who chases thrills skydiving, jsut someone who stands out from the crowd
what about you? what traits do you like in guys?
How many times can walking on a beach possibly be interesting to you?
I have a casual interest in those things myself, but like the other anon said it's highly correlated with traits that are undesirable in a romantic relationship
I'm not that person but I met some one on discord. It was a really nice relationship. I almost moved to be with them but my depression got too bad and they thought I lost interest. I couldn't admit that the anti depressants I tried taking made me really sick for a long time even after I stopped taking them. I saw them a couple times when things were going well, took a few 4 hour flights to be with them. I can't recommend it, but when you find the right person you click with it's silly not to try to make it work.
I went on a tinder date nearly 2 weeks ago and afterwards there was a noticeable drop in conversation and then I got left on read when I told him my availability this week.
It's a little strange though since he seemed eager to plan another time at the end of our first date. I would have forgotten about him by now except that I've had dreams about him for the past two days aaaaAAAA
Maybe he felt like it wasn't going to work out due to the large gaps in time. I also wouldn't recommend putting too much emotional energy into tinder(the guys) because it really is almost entirely just casual sex/hook ups unfortunately…
Why can't girls be direct and honest with how they're feeling about you?
Why couldn't my crush tell me to get lost and disappear out of her life instead of torturing me by pretending to be friends but ignoring me?
>>17395>Why can't girls be direct and honest with how they're feeling about you?
Difficult things are difficult
>>17395>Why couldn't my crush tell me to get lost and disappear out of her life instead of torturing me by pretending to be friends but ignoring me?
Whoa there, fren. What makes you think she wanted you to get lost and disappear? Rejection hurts, but it doesn't mean the other person can't stand you as a person. It means they aren't interested in you as a romantic partner. If it hurts too much for you to continue being friends, that is understandable, but you must know that crush rejection doesn't come from a place of hate in almost all cases.
don't be fooled by pic related. they usually have unhealthy standards for women and hate most of us for not being their crazy ideal, that's why they're forever alone.
Me in bottom right
>tfw no gene wolfe reading SO
they only want someone who is as autistic about fitness as they are
I work on becoming fit (currently skinny) and i'm not autistic, would you date?(YOU CAN'T SIT WITH US)
>>17464>tfw no hope of ever being loved for who you are
>don't be fooled by pic related.
>middle of the night
>decide to flip on some gay porn
>instead of aroused, become deeply upset
>iwn be able to caress a man's leg or or wrap my arm around him, let alone touch his genitals
I didn't expect this to be where I am at 21
>>17499>iwn be able to caress a man's leg or or wrap my arm around him, let alone touch his genitals
What makes you say that?
I don't have a great track record when it comes to getting guys.>approach men with little success >only "sure let's get lunch" I got ended up disliking my personality>have been hit on 1 (one) time by a man who was also hitting on every other girl in the area we were in using pua tactics >standards probably too high, only interested in sticc short (although tall is okay at times) men but they prefer petite women>terrible social skills; can't make eye contact, phrase things oddly, incapable of playing those weird "chase" relationship games that women are supposed to do>acne scars on chest and back, even if I got a bf he'd vomit at the sight of me (although I will see a derm in 3 months)>otherwise, average face, Iskra-tier body, weird deep voice, wear glasses
If I switched my standards to chubby men, or nasty ones like the pua I could make it but I don't want to. Overall it is
my own fault, but I still feel bad and want to complain. I'll continue working on myself and hope the little guys accept me someday I guess.
Maybe she was born with no arms.
He's going to drive about 6 hours to meet me in person for the first time soon. I'm honestly excited, it's been a few months and I'm sure we'll get along well when we meet.
It's the first time I've had anyone care about me so much.
These are my favorite posts on CC.
your story is similar to how i met my fiance (albeit it wasn't in a discord server), he flew to see me in a different continent and we're together now. good luck! <3
I know how you feel. My very specific type is muscular submissive men. Never mind that they're rare, I'm seemingly the opposite of what would attract them. I'm short, introverted, kinda awkward, and almost a NEET. But I still have a lot of hope that I'll find the right person (and if you think about it, I'm sure they are multiple right people for you! just not one) and I'll keep doing the best I can to become a better person every day. Even if someone is shy, fat, awkward as hell, whatever seemingly negative trait, as long as they're making small steps every day and staying positive they'll attract good things to them. It sounds stupidly naive but that's how I feel. The worst thing anyone can do is give up. Giving up and settling shows a lack of love for oneself and it shows, further making it harder to find the right person.
>>17507>Even if someone is shy, fat, awkward as hell, whatever seemingly negative trait, as long as they're making small steps every day and staying positive they'll attract good things to them.>Giving up and settling shows a lack of love for oneself and it shows, further making it harder to find the right person.
You got me anon, I typed that with my feet. just kidding>>17507
Thanks anon, that's very positive and cheered me up a bit. I hope we can both find someone to fit with us, and I wish you luck on your self-improvement journey.
I'm glad it helped you a little. If you have the time you should read up on Neville Goddard, he talks a lot about the power of imagination and visualization. I never believed in this weird hippie motivational BS before and I would have waved it off, but I've had some good experiences using it with small things so far. Everyone has the power to change their reality.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-7OmfSgck7g
I guess that makes me a femcel… ?
I'm more of an extremes person, so to me there are two options aka either alone or with someone who checks all the requirements.
right? I feel like everyone thinks having one is like being in a shoujo manga or something. It's tedious as fuck in real life.
It's not just us. Everyone wants a mate except for like a small minority of asexual, aromantic hyper autists that can dedicate their lives to ideas and projects.
"Why I don't read contemporary SF/Fantasy" No. 18,472 in a series
I want to romance a guy and fuck a lot.>>17556>tedious
tbf I'm an extremely boring person myself. Talking often to a friend who I also fuck exclusively and love doesn't sound awful to me, is it bad in reality?
I used to want one but going down the rabbit hole of TheRedPill and Braincels has destroyed any fantasies I've ever had of being in a normal, nice romantic relationship. I just want to eat pizza, play videogames and cuddle with someone I care about but apparently, guys don't think the same. Sorry for being a Debbie Downer.
"Loving" men is possible, but it's not an equal sort of affection. The thing is that you can't consider men to be proper humans; treat them like glorified sex pets. They're fun to play with, but have no emotional depth or understanding and can be dangerous without correct precautions. No use talking to most of them about everything you think or relying on them to help you out emotionally.
If I were to date a woman (possible, but statistically unlikely to find a girl who likes girls and also likes me sadly) it would be very different. She'd be an emotionally evolved, empathetic person and we could be actual "partners" whereas if it was a man he would just be like a person who lives with that I take care of.
Coincidentally I prefer both small men and small dogs.
>>17564>TheRedPill and Braincels
Failed males and sour grapes. These aren't typical guys. There's no insight or conclusions that you can really get from these people other than what it is to be a failed male.
I hate to break this to you, but you have autism. Genuine medical autism. >>17566
You do also. Tragic how much this affliction affects this community.
Present your argument for men being our emotionally intelligent equals.
You can't, men commit most violent crimes and those who are crime free either joke about rape/assault or want to do it but are too cowardly. If you can make a valid case for good, caring men existing I'd actually be very happy to hear it. Please change my mind, I'm very tired of this existence.No comment on being autistic. I know it's a joke, but I suspect I may actually be on the spectrum. I just can't be assed to get tested.
I don't think anyone doubts that men are generally less emotional. Not sure what emotionally intelligent even means though so I'll be skipping that part
>want to do it but are too cowardly
What's stopping me from saying this about literally every person? This seems like a silly case of playing around with vague definitions, going back all the way to the paradox of altruism.
>>17571>If you can make a valid case for good, caring men existing I'd actually be very happy to hear it.
First, let's put aside whether metrics of emotional intelligence are useful and assume they are. It's not a topic I'm particularly familiar with so I don't want to get in that sort of argument. However, when dealing with almost any human attribute, whether physical or mental, it's important to note the variation in-group is generally larger than the variation between groups. This seems to be no exception.
I pulled out a random study I found on the gender differences in emotional intelligence (Age and gender differences in ability emotional intelligence in adults: A cross-sectional study). As expected, women on average outscore men with a total EI score of 102.52 compared to men's 97.37, but the standard deviation of the result is 12.49 for women. The difference is less than half a standard deviation, meaning that around 35% of women have a lower total EI score than the average man. If you want to make the claim that a very large percentage of men lack emotional intelligence, then you're doing the same to women (throw 50% of men under the bus and you're throwing 35% of women under the bus).
I don't know if it's sensational headlines or what that makes people misunderstand psychological differences like this. You see it everywhere, whether it's theredpill, /r9k/ or even here. A gender difference existing in a trait doesn't mean that the every single person part of the gender is now either superior or inferior. These things merely deal with averages.
A similar thing applies to crime. You're dealing with a small percentage of the population who does that stuff. If 2% of a gender does something compared to 1% of the other gender, why would it mean that the other 98% is just horrible people while the 99% is just fine?
>>17595>tfw you'll never find a man as good as your dad
where have all the good men gone? are they tokens of a bygone era?
Have you never been to Church?
I want a bf my own age, who understands me and is lonely like me… I wanna cuddle and listen to emo rap songs
I'm talking online wit a guy who is older. We have a little in common. I doubt he really respects me. I'm too afraid to cut him off, bt it's not real
A lot of misogynistic men claim that all women are trash - except their own mother.
You make it sound like that anon implied her dad is the only good man
>stare at man without restraint in uni food court because I have given up on having shame
>he smiles and waves at me
>no one was behind me or around where I was situated
Did he mistake me for someone else or was he making fun of me? The former seems unlikely since I dress oddly and have a certain goofy face.
I don't think so. Personally I think that's what a relationship should be. You plan on spending the rest of your life with this person, it should be something like that. Then again I'm a boring person also, so maybe it's just a boring person thing.
Okay anons, a simple question.
You are presented two options:
Single forever or a bf that dresses like this every day. Your choice?
Honestly this is so far out there, only someone genuinely passionate about medieval armory (which would be cool to see honestly) would wear that
That actually looks kinda cool minus the hood part. Get rid of that dumb shit and I think it makes a pretty cool sweatshirt that isn't over the top attention whoring but unique enough to be nice to wear.
Is it bad I kinda like this? I mean it isn't the /worst/ thing a guy could wear - just put the hood down. It certainly isn't a deal breaker for being single forever lmao
>>17636>a bf that dresses like this every day
I'll get a medieval dress to match him!
>>17571>thinks men are emotionally incompetent >doesn't know about the gfd sub boys
you've been missing out anon
Anon, I WISH that sub boys were a guarantee of emotional advancement, but reality can fall short.
I want to say thanks for this, anon.
I admit I get carried away with my nonsense out of a deep seated fear of men due to years of rejection, reading misogynistic shit online, and then getting balls deep into man-hating-fear-mongering rhetoric. It's ridiculously easy to get radicalized if a person is emotionally weak in some aspect, and this is undeniably my weak spot.
It's the same as when I fear all men have a fetish for torturing women but someone will pull up some data saying 40% are into femdom or something.
I'm just addicted to being afraid of men and making myself miserable! >>17651
I am missing out because sub boys are impossible to find, even more so for me since no one wants me at all.
What's with this site and the glorification of sub males as dream bfs?
Vocal minority of posters here.
I guess you could say we're dominant
on this site.
Pretty sure sub boys aren't hard to find, you just don't look in the right places. I've seen quite a few.
crystal.cafe only has 4 posters and if 3 people like sub-males than I guess it's a majority I guess.
preferences for position is not a thing you can immediately ask a potential partner like you would ask for their tv show preferences. So you cant easily filter down people to those preferences. So as such the only hope is to find a loving partner who respects you and maybe then you can get along regarding each other's sexual desires; not necessarily forced into it just to please you but out of genuine mutual feelings.
Where irl outside of BDSM meet ups (that I don't want to attend)? The closest I know is a 1 (one) switch. I know that maybe
some robot on 4chan would give me a chance but a ldr sounds awful and I fear he'd give up or secretly be a degenerate into pedo or necroshit like many male channers.
Also like I said no one wants me, both because I'm a 6/10 and because I lack social skills.
Okay 1. yes I'm going to say LDR. Sometimes with traits like this you can't just go outside and find the person with this trait. LDRs can pay off for people who are patient and not morally corrupt.
2. Are you fucking serious? Pedo/necro shit. Why must you take one terrible thing you see and apply it to the entire male population. You do this shit a lot, if anything that is what is going to help you fail in finding a guy. You can't always be assuming the guy you are hitting up is going to fuck someone else and bail on you to have pedophile dead corpse fuck parties or whatever rad fem shit you have read by now that is a bunch of rhetoric lies based off of one bad experience someone faced.
That being said, I see a lot of guys want 6/10's. Yeah the male standard often shows it's easier for 8/10+ get it easier, but a lot of guys will be happy with a 6/10 because for long term, they are looking for someone they connect with, with a personality. They would rather have a 6/10 with a bearable personality than a 8/10 bimbo who they got nothing in common with.
No relationship guarantees emotional advancement, that's something you have to work towards yourself, but having a loving, loyal, listening, and kind gfd bf definitely does help from my experience.>>17655>impossible to find
go to a munch and get involved in your local femdom community or post an online personal if you're actually interested, or just be extremely lucky in an irl encounter or through guessing.>>17656
I just love my bf and want the same for other anons.
Why wouldn't you wanna attend BDSM meetups? If you're afraid of being awkward around other people I get that, but if you're worried it's gonna be some kinky shitshow munches aren't at all. They're just people meeting up and talking, usually about normal people things, and if you're shy, people will usually try to help you along and try to include you because they went through the same thing when they first started.
But I seriously went to a couple scared out of my mind, people weren't having a giant orgy like I imagined. People actually do talk about normal things the majority of the time, they might ask your orientation/dynamic preference and leave it at that. Although from what I saw, a lot of the people that go to those tend to be poly, unfortunately.
She is applying it the chan male population which is much more reasonable.
It's definitely easy to get stuck in a mindset like that. It can start as a bad experience or as a natural bias against an out-group. Then you go online, but even in a relatively normal place without extremism you have a few disgusting people, so your confirmation bias kicks in and you focus on posts by those people while paying a lot less attention to the others. And because people like that tend to be a lot more vocal about their views, they seem to be a lot more numerous, and you may begin to feel that almost everyone is like that. You get stuck in a vicious cycle where the things you read make your biases worse and your biases make you focus more and more on the hateful stuff on top of making you more likely to surround yourself with people with similar views. It can be quite difficult to break it even with rational arguments, since the human mind is very adept at making you think you're being rational regardless of your thoughts.
I think actually knowing or being friends with good people from the group is something that helps in keeping a more positive mindset.
said I was referring to 4chin guys and mostly robots with that blanket statement. I know ~not all channers~, but speaking openly about liking that shit is more prevalent with those men than with normfags irl. So much so that on /r9k/ that "rape is bad" seems like a radical statement. Even on /adv/ it's common for anons to go on and post about cheating on their gf, which is all enough for me to feel uneasy about it.
Can't speak much for other boards since I really only visit /an/ and occasionally /co/, which does get questionable sometimes with sexualizing minors.>>17666
Decided to look up what was going on in my area (even made a fucking fetife account temporarily to look), but the people attending these events are all either:>10+ years older>male doms>str8 female subs>transwomen
And I'm not interested in any of those. May be a bit picky, but I'm not into 60 year old men.
Although I did find a 4-year-old post on some other site made by a man who was 100% my type, so that gives me hope that they exist anyway. So, uh, thanks for inspiring this journey anyway anon.>>17681
The kicker is that my only friends are men, and although one is a pretty stereotypical casual misogynistic neckbeard type the others are respectful. One is even from a known misogynistic culture but brought up women's rights during our first full conversation.
Oddly enough I think my dehumanization of men has made it easier to befriend them than women since I weigh their opinions of me as lesser. Although it hardly seems worth it due to the guilt I sometimes I feel over it mixed with the fear of them being evil in secret.
Like I said I am tired of this existence, but I know the onus is on me to change myself and hatred and fear are addictive.
Social media has really ruined the romantic connection between woman and men and how they could interact in public. What upsets me most is that you can't feel any chemistry with someone online how could in real life.
>tfw no tall, strong, and kindhearted bf to make me feel safe at all times
No way I'll find somebody like this in today's world. I should stop reading old novellas tbh.
I think image boards have ruined me.
A few months ago I met this guy and spent two weeks wondering,
“OK, what’s wrong with him? He’s hiding something.”
Then the event ended.
Then I realized,
“No, he was a legitimately good hearted guy that was tall, strong, and religious.”
same anon w an update: >we've been texting/sexting/etc. i've been to his house to canoodle (i don't deserve a bf for saying canoodle ik) >he's still ideal n a good guy but he's a fcking sag and will leave our ~status~ in limbo for as long as possible probably. >i doubt he even wants to be my bf but will leave hints or act like we are already together that probably don't even mean anything and was just not him thinking before speaking >we haven't even f*cked? idk if that means anything >we talked about seeing a movie this friday but made no plans (he usually makes plans by texting me the day of if what we suggested was still on which stresses me out) >some days we have great convos but other days it's dry…i'll overreact but then i realize sags need alone time lol >i've found old embarrassing photos of him to help me detach from him and it's working well lmao
somebody pls help me sort this out
>>17571>Present your argument for men being our emotionally intelligent equals.
Considering the filed of psychology and psychoanalysis is being led by men…huh
Never mind that care for feet is huge industry in the world with nail polish/pedicures but the soles of feet are arguably one of the most attractive parts of the body. They look good, feel good to have foreplay with, and for people who like mustier smells might (depending on context) smell good. idk what you're on about. You get so defensive it sounds like you're repressing your own fetish. like you're tsundere for feet.
NTA claiming that men aren't capable of emotional intelligence, but psychology as a whole and psychoanalysis aren't about studying emotional intelligence, so this is a moot point.
(Also something about the bias that creates when men are considered the standard in humanity, but that is a different conversation)
What's so weird about it? I grew up around my older brother and most of my friends are male, so forgive me, but I don't really get what's strange about some good old bantz.
I guess I kinda get what you're saying. That's pretty much how I feel about bdsm. Like what's sexy about getting slapped or joked?
Sorry that was off topic.
Do minecraft mod reviews.
…YES anon. Oh, and crystal.cafe minecraft server when?
I totally get what you mean.
My first real mostly-guys friend group was a real eye opener - constantly ragging on each other, nicknames and ‘good-natured’ abuse.
I’ve spent so much time around them now that I’m used to it and I join in / they ‘include’ me in the haranguing, but man the first while was just weird.
The thing is, sometimes? Some of them get drunk and they’ll outright say ‘you know I really love hanging out with you guys, you’re the best’. But that only ever seems to come out when drunk.
And a couple of times (with me at least) they’ll let down the sarcasm walls and just be frank about things.
I really don’t know why that sort of closeness seems to be so anathema to them most of the time though.
I would love a comfy Minecraft server to play on omg
Just imagine all the robots griefing. It'd be no fun.
>"Something that gets overlooked a lot is the fact of how important it is to love yourself and believe in yourself as much as you might anyone else."
This entire spiel is pretty much the advice equivalent of the "this is fine" meme, just normie buzzing. Literally the only thing normies talk about when it comes to getting a relationship is confidence, when confidence can be an overtly bad thing that specifically blinds you to the things that make you undesirable or that're keeping you from finding someone you'll be happy with. Sitting idly and pretending you're perfect just the way you are, you just haven't been lucky, or just haven't found the right one might be true, but it is unrealistic and completely unhelpful. If you want to find out what's keeping you from finding someone to love, you have to look deep within yourself to find what you want. I don't mean "Blah blah blah, I want a 6'8'' tall boy who wears military fashion in bed" or "I want a qt 5'2'' sub boy who calls me queen", I mean, why you want those things. Do you want your bf to be 6'8'' because that's what you think you need to feel safe and protected around them? If you just want to feel safe and protected by your bf, do they actually need to be 6'8'', or is that just an unnecessary aesthetic? Find out what's absolutely essential to your happiness and never settle for less, and look for the qualities you're looking for, not only aesthetics or bonuses, and then start asking yourself why this bf would want you. Think about what you have to offer, and if you think you have nothing to offer, or not enough, work on that, you can change to be a better more well rounded person, it just takes work, and even if it's not enough, the work you put towards yourself will help you either way. Then consider how you might have chances to meet this boy, do you have lots of friends? Are you part of any community? If you're just a shut in neetet, the chances you'll have will be minimal, even if you're perfect, you can work on this too. Even if it is normie spiel the last bit was right though.
>"Just because it hasn't happened yet, doesn't mean it won't. Some things take longer than others."
Personally I don’t necessarily agree with her that it’s just normie spiel.
I mean, it IS normie spiel, but there’s also truth in it I think.
As she says the last bit is spot on - just becuase it hasn’t happened, doesn’t mean it won’t.
But also, the bit about it not being the most important thing. Sure, it can really be horrible being alone, but having a boyfriend or girlfriend isn’t the be-all and end-all of life’s goals.
I’d much rather not hate mysel than have a partner.
Of course, I guess that’s easy for me to say since I’m in a relationship but still hate myself.
I don’t know maybe it just resonates with me a bit. I felt really awful about how I was going to die alone for ages and ages and the minute I realised that I was actually pretty okay on my own, I fell in love. We’ve been together two years now, and honesty I’m pretty certain that it wouldn’t have happened if I’d still been in that ‘I’m going to die alone oh no’ phase.
So, in summary of this weird ramble, it may be generic advice, but it IS important to not freak out over being alone.
Don’t hate yourself for being alone, don’t hate others for being in a relationship. It may just be something that’s coming down the road a little bit!
And as for the loving yourself part, I think that’s always important. In a relationship or out. If you don’t love and respect yourself, you’re probably going to put up with a lot of bull you dont have to, from people in general or from a boyfriend.
You must be horrifically disfigured if you can't even get a hug from someone.
How often do you get hugged by somebody for the first time?And how do you do it?
There exists professional cuddlers ya know
No they exist in west too; but it’ not mainstream
Apparently it is, anon. Apparently it is…
I'm too sheltered then, I wouldn't know where to look and someplace like craigslist seems sketchy.
Tell us more about those cuddlers. Have you ever used their services? Where do you know about them from?
I don't understand y'all. What is so great about having a boyfriend/girlfriend?
Like I get the companionship and sex thing, sure, but in practice even if you do get a boyfriend/girlfriend it's still a roll of the dice if he's a good one. People's worse attitudes don't really come out until you know them very well - so the person may look like your dream boy/dream girl, but a few months/years into the relationship they drop the act and just let it all hang out. Lots of people have spouses that were really nice during the dating stage but turn abusive during marriage.
But of course it's also possible that you do get an S.O. that really is a good partner for you. Just saying that some of y'all have unrealistic expectations.
Other anons already mentioned the 'being confident' and 'being yourself' etc. and I won't go into that (although it is very much true in a lot of cases); just at the very least, don't come off as desperate. Especially if the person is used to dating/emotionally intelligent they can probably sense if you're desperate.
It's speaking from experience when I say that if you're in an abusive relationship or otherwise in a tight spot (ex. money troubles, illness, family issues, etc.) you would sometimes wish you'd rather be single. From the userbase of this site I'd guess most of the users are pretty young, a lot are minors. Words of advice from a (slightly) older person, just take it easy and take the time to enjoy your youth. If you really do want to be in a relationship try to be mature about it - getting into a relationship I drastically underestimate the effort and maturity it takes to not just start a relationship, but sustain it (that's the harder part).
Best of luck.
Because knowing that one person in the world that isn't a blood relative cares about you and your existence on a deep and intimate level is an incredibly validating feeling that all people long for.
Also we're animals so we wanna fug.
Does anyone else here distrust most men thanks to incels/red-pillers/MGTOWs/etc? I have never considered myself a misanderist, but seeing how popular woman hating is among the men of my generation, maybe I should.
lol, misandry among women is just as "popular" as incel-redpill ideology is among men, meaning they're both extremely fringe things and not popular at all. You're just going to end up sabotaging yourself.
>>17943>People's worse attitudes don't really come out until you know them very well
This is why I only date if I've known someone for a year or two. I can't even open up and trust someone if I don't know them for at least a few years.
Are all of you fucking retards here delusional?
You do nothing but complain and not try to better your situation, most likely you look like cave trolls as well.
How about you propose some ways of bettering their situation and jumpstart them a little?
Agree with this, I hopped on the misandry train for a while but the amount of men who ID with incelism/manosphere shit isn't as big as it seems. Most normfags I talk to don't even know what the fuck I'm going on about when I've mentioned them.
Their numbers are only inflated online because
they're online so much. Most men stick to social media like insta and twitter and normfag yt channels, plus many aren't super involved in social politics.
From there you could add >but what about casually misogynistic men?!
And I'd agree, but even then I wouldn't say that's all men or an overwhelming
majority. Maybe about 1/2 of men are still decent (depending on where you live, I'm a canuck so most are left-leaning and drink their respecting women juice), which isn't too bad but if you're also into women I recommend going that route instead since the chances are even better.
Overall, your best bet is just to take a lot of safety precautions and not ignore red flags.
>does the fact I consider myself handsome outweigh all of these cons?
It does not I'm afraid.
I laughed out loud at this post lol
>>18062>Overall, your best bet is just to take a lot of safety precautions and not ignore red flags.
And yall wonder why you're in a tfw no bf thread
is what you've taken from my post as illogical? That being cautious is wrong? topkek
No, a woman should NOT go to some stranger's house just after meeting him (especially since most women date stronger men). Nor should she trust him alone with her drink on the first few meetings. And no, she shouldn't ignore if he has a past of abusing/cheating on his gfs or if he spouts some redpill-tier shit. Or gets possessive or puts her down all the time.
I'd rather be tfw no bf than have an abusive bf or get assaulted. Have fun with your risks, just know rape/assault of women isn't as uncommon as we'd like to think. But the likelihood can be greatly reduced through some precautions.
>>18062>left leaning men
In my experience a man who says,
“I am a male feminist”
might as well announce,
“I am a sexual predator”
1) my big brother is amazing. Too good to be true. Yet the two girls he has dated seriously have treated him terribly & and the rest ignore him.
2) for every 2 woman hate threads on the other place there is a thread of ‘why can’t i find a woman to love & cherish?’ thread.
I feel like there is our camp where all we meet are jerks and their camp where all they meet are bitches.
How can the good women meet the good men?!
It's not about who you meet, it's about how you meet them. The love of your life might look like just another jerk under some circumstances (are you never rude online?) and you might be looking like a bitch to just the kind of guy you've been looking for other times. There are no good or evil qualities. Find someone that has what you are looking for and see the good in them.
Not men who are loud and proud about it (I know what you mean), but who are casually supportive of women doing cool shit with their lives (working in STEM, getting buff, etc.), are fine discussing their feelings, and have a disgusted visceral reaction to rape. Bonus if they notice shitty portrayal of women in old media.
Sadly that's what counts as lefty, treating women like any other person who deserves equal opportunity.
Not where I’m from.
I live in the American South and a good ol’ boy just wants to know if you can shoot, dance, and drive fast but the Lefties are all squishy talkers who don’t like it if you outshine them
>>18101>2) for every 2 woman hate threads on the other place there is a thread of ‘why can’t i find a woman to love & cherish?’ thread.
Lies, this was maybe true years ago but people are angry always now.
This is like what 90% of guys want. The 5% are sex-addled dudebros and the other 5% are angry incels.
I was with you until you generalized. Good grief. Are you male or a woman who believes their rhetoric?
In defense of this phenomenon of tfw no bf having nothing to do with Chad, I want exclusively skelly brown manlets (under 5'5") but none of them want me. I've vented in these threads about two rejections so far (and there were two more outside of that although one was white), and I imagine there being many more in the future…which is fine, I'll keep going and hope it woks at some point. But that supposed ease of a attracting men isn't as true as they say, even for an average girl who dresses up all the time.
I don't doubt we have an advantage over men, but it's closer than what you said there lol.
You don't even deserve a response. I'm a fucking autist for replying.
>mfw people actually believe the over 6'0 meme
>mfw I don't give a damn about someone else's job
I don't have a bf because I don't talk to guys and go straight home after classes.
It sounded like an incel's go-to assumption about single girls. It evades me why out of all conclusions they could come to, they always end up assuming we're single because "your standards must be impossibly high and you only want tall Chads, fuck you!!!" Do they think we're all surrounded by guys who can't wait to date us but we're just to picky to choose one of them? lol as if. It's more common that someone's single because they have severe social anxiety and never go out, are ugly by society's standard and haven't met someone yet who'd accept their looks, or they actively confess to guys but get rejections which is a pretty normal thing.
>>18216>I don't have a bf because I don't talk to guys and go straight home after classes.
Nah. Sorry to break it to you but its because you're ugly. If you weren't ugly guys would be talking to you. They'd stop you before you could leave class to ask you out.
That's true. But according to robots, girls with no bfs can't blame their appearance even if they'd be seen as ugly by most people (pic-related). Nah, we just have high standards kek.
She could be average (5-6/10). Men only actively seek out 8s, 9s, and 10s since male attraction is solely based on looks.
That's why they project about women only wanting Chads.
Some of you are rude as fuck.
You're not sorry, you get kicks out of being a toxic cunt anonymously lol
Well you're probably not actually loling, you're sad and angry.
Anonymous Moderator 18254
Time to get back on topic. Don't attack others for no reason.
How is the reason someone has no bf not on topic for a no bf thread?
Anonymous Moderator 18261
Speculating about a user's appearance just to antagonize them isn't conductive to the thread. Neither is arguing about it.
Have any of you people ever hugged a guy?
Would be nice, especially if I get to see others look at us holding hands.
I've hugged male friends, even my high school fixation used to let me squeeze, lift, and prod at him (but not hold his hand or anything romantic) although he always looked uncomfortable.
I count myself as lucky for that chance.
What physical contact do you think about the most:
Resting head on lap/chest
Head patting/playing with hair
Hugging from behind
One of these things is not like the other>Foot rubs
You forgot nose rubbing
When I was 16 my parents volunteered me to help set up our church for Easter. Turns out my crush and his brothers were there, too.
I was studying for college entrance exams and was tired and there was more & more to do. After hours I snuck off to the social hall to lie down & my crush was there, eating. He asked to to sit with him.
I was so happy he was talking to me, but I kept yawning! He asked why I was so tired, so I told him. He suggested I stretch out on the padded pew he was on, so I did tried. I was so tired I actuysaid out loud
‘I wish I could rest my head in your lap’.
He said ok.i regret I actually drifted off.
I think about it all the time.
I hate feet and everything about feet. I would especially appreciate it if my hypo partner ignored my feet completely
I don't know if there's hope for me when it's so easy for all men to get girlfriends.
Last semester an ugly-cute boy who sat in front of me in math sometimes was approached by an alt-stacey and she was all over him and dragged him into her friend group. By "ugly-cute" I want to explain by saying he has a weak chin, large nose, "poor" bone structure (in regards to cheek brow bones), pock marked skin, is 5'8", and is Indian (while she is white). These are supposed death sentences to incels/bots (apart from maybe his height? it's average where I live) but clearly not since she was drawn to him and so was I. He has big eyes and is skelly which always draws me in, I especially enjoy the contrast between "undesirable" traits with a couple cute ones since it reads as vulnerable to me.
Through observing their interactions he was also asocial and interacted awkwardly with her and she initiated everything, so it couldn't be that. He also later avoided sitting next to her in future classes, BUT HE HAD A CHANCE TO DATE HER! SHIT!
What hope is there anons? How can I know I'll find a man that will resist the urge to drop me for 8-10/10s? Since these women clearly also desire all sorts of men and male attraction is very strictly conventional.
Should I sudoku?
No you just saw a asexual man out in the wild
Sorry, the point of my post was that men, regardless of looks, have a chance with high-tier women. So why bother with my average appearance?
I'm not sure why he avoided her later, she seemed genuinely nice aside from being good looking. Perhaps he is ace/gay, but egardless it doesn't impact my overall point.
What would you rate yourself with and without makeup?
What if he were just plain ugly and not ugly-cute?
You don't need a bf to be happy. Focus on your own happiness and well-being. Other people are unimportant.
nta but you're right, bless you
am I hypocrite if I like to read degenerate stuff like yaoi manga and shota hentai, but would immediately cut all contact with a potential bf if I found his loli hentai collection?
I thought we couldnt reply to this thread due to the post limit did a couple of male posts get deleted or sumthin? I would bormally psot link to new thread but im drunk
>tfw finally got a boyfriend and he was excited to spend new years with me
>instead I lied that I was going out tonight with friends but I'm actually sitting in a dark room home alone in my underwear eating ramen to avoid going out
>probably gonna see him tomorrow and make up a story about how i had a really fun night out
I hate myself and I don't deserve anyone
Weird flex but ok
May 2019 be the year you and your bf get married and enjoy a perfect relationship
It'll suck either way but I would tell him you just wanted to be alone and weren't sure how to phrase it. I assume he knows you're a bit introverted?>eating in underwear
sorry, he's my first boyfriend and we've only been dating like 2 weeks. i felt at home in these threads, I guess it's time for me to go for now.
He wanted me to meet his friends and i felt really anxious about it. I didn't want him to have to cancel his plans with his friends though because I'm retarded
Stick around, share what worked, give anons the confidence they need. And seriously, tell him, apologize as you do, but tell him. Honesty is important in a relationship.
>>18999>share what worked
honestly? He's a huge autist on the inside and also grew up on image boards. We met on Tinder and I had a /co/ tag on my bio (lame I know). The difference between him and other guys I've met like that is that he's a normal dude. He knows how to hide it and turn up the charm. I'm similar, but have always wanted to connect with someone that knew all the inside jokes. Hell, I tell him about yaoi fanfiction I've read and he loves to joke about it with me. I can't believe I've met someone so cute that I can relate to and be so honest with about my hobbies. He also knows I'm a virgin and is more than willing to take it slow until I'm comfortable.
Tinder is pretty decent when you weed out all the losers that just want to fuck and bounce. It's also easier for anxious people like me that have an easier time texting while getting to know each other. I have absolutely no idea how to meet guys in real life though.
god I'm fucking lonely
and then anytime I involve myself with people, I remember why I stopped talking to people in the first place
I just want this empty sad feeling to go away.
>>14839>Any skinny guy with big eyes is an 10/10 to me.
Hmm, I wonder where that comes from?