>>51005>hang out with moid friend a lot>he likes me>meh>start to not like him as much>he acts as though his happiness depends on me
what the fuck do i do i want to leave him but i feel so bad, he's always asking to hang out and shit too
Tell him to pay attention to other girls because you are just not feelin it. It happens that moids get clingy even obssesice sometimes. Give him a no in a nice way but also tell him he got what he needs to get most other girls so everything ends well even if its a lie. Frien zone him but with the other hand give him a pat on the back otherwise he can end up hating you.
>>51009>i want to leave him
Then leave him. Stop going along with the patriarchy brainwashing and prioritising moid feeling above your own. He wouldn't do it for you.
yeah the one job i was confident i got didn’t respond to me after the interview (even though it went so well!) maybe because i didnt want to do fulltime? but in their hiring it said part time :(
one thing im 100% doing is some online classes in august, so thats something that wont make me feel so guilty. i kind of have a 5 month window to continue neeting and actually pushing with my hobbies (i limited my daily goals to just 3 and so far its helping today) and i think im going to keep looking into some jobs as well. im at least content with the fact ill be taking those classes though!
anyway, thank you anon.
I'm a horribly selfish person… I'm in a bad situation i feel horrible… But i feel like after everything i truly deserve it..
>>51005>schizoid>make one online friend out of a really convenient circumstance who was the only person i've been able to connect with in my life, pretty much had the best time of my life so far with her>turns out she was actually a horrible person who was making children cut themselves online because she thought it was cool where i couldn't see it>still miss her and care about her despite what she did, almost been a year, meanwhile she has a ton of new friends none of which know what she's actually like
i have no idea what to do to make it stop and feel really foolish
i dont have a cat and i wish i did
Go find one and take it in anon!
I miss going places with friends. Having a local group to get together with. Not because covid ruined it for me, but because I haven't had it in a decade. I'm 31 in a student town and have two local friends, one of which I don't even like, and the other is never really around. I miss nothing more than to be with a few people I like and hang out until early morning and fall asleep or be driven home by one of them or stumble out of a dingy small-town night cafe. I've gotten really lonely and I finally realized that it's because of how cynical I've become. I've lived through a lot of stuff and people always tell me how resilient I am, but I'm really not, I've just barely hanging on simply because I'm too cowardly for suicide. I can't form bonds with people anymore because I'm so wary of everything now and every little thing turns me off. I miss being naive and accepting and excitable. I know this has destroyed a lot of friendships for me. I just want to go back to being a dumbass teen and find some people I belong with.
It also makes me miss the Tumblr era. Not the politics side but the dynamics of how the community was based on romanticizing yourself and your connections to others. I still maintain that the SJW side of Tumblr was relatively easy to avoid as long as you weren't trying to befriend any of them. A lot of the contacts I made on Tumblr are pinkpilled now, anyway.
It's embarrassing to admit but I was small-time popular on Tumblr in a niche community and I really loved having an open inbox and responding to people and making friends. Sometimes I want to go back and make a blog again now that most of the hardcore crowd moved to Twitter, but my main issue is that in the past years I've done so much weird shit that has led to so many weird situations, I can't even begin to describe it all and if I talked about it people would judge the hell out of me. At the same time, I don't think I can truly be close to people who don't know that side of me because it's so elemental to who I am now. Plus I've gotten so paranoid about internet safety and I know that if I tied too many things about me together on one blog, some people could find it and gather info about who I am. I feel really stuck and isolated and it's all because I got too bitter over the years. I don't know how to change.
I want to be alone and I want friends too. My whole life I have wanted to escape other people. I feel so sad. I'm so fucking sad. But if somebody were to reach out I'd fuck it all up anyway. Why am I like this?
I feel p lonely lately pretty much bc I've ruined every friendship I've ever made bc most of my best friends growing up moved away, and this sort of made me push people away before they could leave me (I guess???). Anyway, dealing with that now means I barely talk to anyone outside of my family which means my bf and his close 3 friends which are now my only close friends as well. smh. I did this, but my career goal places me in a very sociable environment anyway (plus I sometimes still go to my campus). Its hard making your own outlets so often
You should look into and ask/talk to a therapist or another professional about Avoidant Personality Disorder and Social Anxiety Disorder, Anon.
No offense but if you have that much weight to lose you have been messing up repeatedly for a long time. You need to stop yo-yoing and change your lifestyle. This mentality of "i just need to crash diet for 3 months and then i will b skinee" will doom you to fail. Try to set up good habits and then find something else to focus on once you have your routine down.
If you take measurements and progress pics you’ll see results every couple of weeks.
I impulse buy whenever I feel sad or anxious, it's most likely my fault since I'm very disoriented and don't pay enough attention to my surroundings
I was trying to find an old valentine pic on my phone to text my sister with and I found out somehow roughly 1200 random images disappeared including the one I was looking for. I'll have to rebuild my shitshow collection from the scraps. Pretty bummed about it because of all the years of saving and transferring.
The number one factor on whether or not I find a guy attractive is whether or not he'd be down with getting a little rough in bed but all I attract are vanilla guys who would cry at the notion of being even slightly dommy. That or guys with mommy/femdom kinks and that stuff makes me wanna gag. IT sucks, cause most dudes that are "tops" tend to be serial cheaters that are only in it for sex and little to no intimacy. If I could I'd do anything to be a vanilla bitch and not care about this stuff, but w/e
Find hot racoons in your area. You will have to use the internet and narrow down specific tastes for that one. Won't be easy but if you get a moid who can satisfy you emotionally, help financially and sexually you are set. If he is ok with you grabbing his butt he is a keeper.
>>51109>>51113>i want a dominant moid, moids with mommy/femdom kinks make me gag>go find yourself a young submissive guy who lets you grab his butt uwu
raccoon moid shilling is annoying already but it's even worse when it's being pushed onto anons who say they're looking for the exact opposite
I'm falling in love with a guy who's taken. It feels like he's doing it on purpose, trying to get me to fall for him. I don't imagine someone being this nice to me if they don't want to fuck me. Every night I go to sleep hugging my pillow, wishing it was him, while he's out there with his girlfriend. I'm tired. I want him to break up with her and take me buy they have been dating for a long while and won't stop for me, clearly. I wish I was good enough for him, I wish he would kiss me. What can I do?
What sort if things does he do?
He tells me I'm cute, that I make him happy, that he connects with me like with none else, that he will always be there for me, he makes all sorts of things for me, and I just can't help but love him.
He shouldn't be telling you those things while in a relationship with another girl, he sounds like trash anon. Don't fall for it.
I've never had a valentine.
But he seems so genuine, so sweet. Maybe it's just platonic and I'm taking it the wrong way?
constantly feel so doom laden about the future. i have this tunnel vision. and all i can see along the way is the gradual stripping of our freedom, privacy and a world where, unlike before where the masses had a chance of victory if they could unite against some perceived evil, we are simply powerless. a world where the powers that be have ascended the commonality of human weakness, and thus we are reduced to consoomerism and wage slavery. ive been aware of this for some time of course, so the point of this post is not that this is some revelatory idea, but rather that i just cant see a reason to live or a reason to care about anything when the future looks so bleak. i seriously cannot imagine a future where things are better in anyway than they are now. just a gradual decay of culture and of identity, of nations and of peoples, until we are all the same, without difference, without anything to fight amongst ourselves over, just drones made to work for them. how do i stop thinking like this? the only thing keeping me going is that this is probably what they want me to do, to give up. felt like a right schizo typing this, sorry, need to stop spending so much time online and on /x/ lol
Sounds like he wants to date you or is just using you to stroke his ego. Do you really want to date someone who will tell another girl these things? You’ll be forever paranoid he’s doing it behind you back. Enjoy the crush but cut contact with him.
Yeah you're right. I should stop this. I really hope he's just awfully nice and doesn't notice.
I hear this a lot. Guess I'm in doomer circles. I often agree, but tonight I don't. You know that the only reason they have so much power of us is because
of the consumerism and all that jazz right? If life ain't worth living, if there is no point, why not attempt to do something about it all?
They only have power because we are complacent. It won't necessarily always be that way. But personally I'm content with my warm bed, my warm food, and my anime.
this is so true. it has been trending this way for a while now but now it’s like everyone is walking around without any thoughts, just consoom consoom consoom. Avoiding pain with merchandise, drugs, or dick is all anyone does anymore. They cry about their privacy being censored yet post their whole lives on their social media, no privacy settings, begging for the world to validate their bland existence. I’m no better really. When I’m sad I do an overpriced face and hope it’ll be the warm hug I’m looking for instead I’m still alone.
i hate my boyfriend's long hair so much. he let it grow over quarantine and won't cut it. i hate it i hate it so much
>>51130>just a gradual decay of culture and of identity, of nations and of peoples, until we are all the same, without difference, without anything to fight amongst ourselves over, just drones made to work for them.
You perfectly described what an "open society" is. I started reading about Soros, his agenda, his fundations, his projects, and god, it's so depressing.>>51136>it has been trending this way for a while now but now it’s like everyone is walking around without any thoughts, just consoom consoom consoom.
It's like we have regressed to a pre-modern state, when the masses weren't educated and were at the mercy of those who kept knowledge for themselves. But what is even more depressing, is to know that everyone has the education to access all the information they need to understand their fate. But they don't.
I hate postmodernism. I just want to live in a modern world with meaningful struggles.
>>51145>It's like we have regressed to a pre-modern state, when the masses weren't educated and were at the mercy of those who kept knowledge for themselves.
Not even close. Premodern was decentralised and everyone had a kind of independent mentality acting in their own interests and not getting caught up in ideas that serve another, impossible to control in any way resembling the modern hellscape of mass media and totalitarian states. Even writing was localised. There was no standard culture, orthography, education, or ways of doing things in general. They barely had a state in comparison to modern states to. So it's impossible to achieve what has been normal in modernity for hundreds of years.
>maybe I will have some free time so I can do hobbies
>all of my classes give work
I'm sick of these 10 hour work days 7 days a week. Feels like I don't have time to have a life.
i just want a milf who loves me and a million dollars
Tell him the truth and if he acts like he's got oneitis then you've just got to tell him off. It's admirable you're worried about his feelings but you've got to stand up for yourself, or else you'll both be less happy in the long run.
Run from this guy, he's trying to use you or is up to something. That is crossing boundaries.
god i hope my friends come back to my uni city too
I just found out that EasySPEWven got banned from discord, and I don't have a way to contact any of them to reconnect. I was only a lurker because I'm incredibly shy, but being in the presence of likeminded women brought me a lot of comfort. I really loved reading chat and catching the articles and videos with my morning coffee.
melodramatic but im tired of answering all of my family’s questions about crypto, stocks, &gambling when ive been telling them exactly what to do for years but theyre only interested in my advice now because it’s popular on social media. they can’t hold anything either (freak out if they lose $20 or 1 bet bc theyre brains are degraded) and dont understand what they’re even buying. u didnt value my advice 5 years ago but you do now because of people on the internet, hmm…
aging parents somehow manage to sell stocks instead of buying them but want me to tell them everything about options and siblings only interested in reddit pump&dumps
Best of all, if i try to give them advice they tell me im wrong because someone on Facebook said that xlm and doge are such good buys or whatever, like ok 1. why do you even keep asking me then and 2. this is literally how i make my entire living
relax edgelord of course people hop onto stuff when it becomes mainstream, that's the point. if you can't be flattered that they found appreciation for your knowledge then just be straightforward and tell them off. you're an adult.
…Well that was fucking humiliating.
But hey, it was either give up those secrets or reread THIS septic fungus: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8755924/chapters/20070595
Yeah he sounds like trash, I feel bad for his gf
He'd very much treat you like this if you dated
>Meet fellow bisex girl at uni
>We both have a lot in common and relate to each other a lot
>She has a long term bf but prefers women
>Finally have close female friend
>One day she and I get shitfaced and she confesses how she's been hiding her friendship with me and other girls at uni since she's worried that her bf will get jealous since her being bi makes him insecure
>She didn't know she was bi until after she started dating him
>When she told him she made friends at uni his response was "already?"
>Is "encouraging" of her but it's obvious he doesn't like her having close friends and would likely not be a fan at all of her having lesbian/bi friends
>She hinds information about me and all out friends and hasn't told him about our sleepovers
>Apparently her bf gave up being friends with people bc they bullied her at school, leaving him ostracised and to this day his social life hasn't recovered
>Her bf clearly resents her having friends bc he gave up many friendships for her
>Despite telling me this she says he's "perfect and wouldn't hurt a fly,"
>In addition to this she deeply wishes she "met him later in life" bc she wishes she was able to "mess around" with girls
>Acknowledges that she will never have a relationship with a girl as long as she dates this guy and she feels as if she isn't a true bisex bc of it
>Her bf is aware of her preference for women and it hurts him too
>Her bf is finding it very hard to adjust to her changing since she came to uni, i.e. finally having her own friend group and being more dependent, he still lives with his parents who apparently coddle him
>Apparently she and her bf have spoken and if they have another serious argument they're gonna break up
>During the christmas period her wifi died and she couldn't contact him, he saw that as a deliberate way of ignoring him, he's also tried to guilt trip her into seeing him despite her family being high risk for covid
>She wants to be with him forever as he was her first relationship and they've been together for almost three years now but she is also very aware that the thought of being with a woman will always be in the back of her head
>Knows she can't have her cake and eat it
>Admits to having sexual feelings towards me and some other girls in the group
>Tbh I've had a five year relationship with a guy and a one year relationship with another and always known I was bi yet i never yearned for women when I was with them so i can't really relate at all
I feel like their relationship is gonna blow up eventually and i'll be there for my friend regardless of what happens but is there any advice or anything i could do for my friend? aside from buying her a drink and taking her to the gay club when lockdown and her relationship ends
how do people end up in these stupid nightmare relationships, what the fuck lol
sheesh this hit close to home, im also struggling w figuring out im bisexual while being in a longterm relationship with my high school sweetheart. he's done a lot of crappy moid shit but we're very knotted together both romantically and practically so i feel like this is going to keep going until one of us hits our breaking point because we both love each other and don't want to not be in each other's lives etc but at the same time i kind of feel like i never got the chance to be my own person and figure myself out and have my own experiences outside of him, and i'm in the prime of my life where i should be doing all these things for myself, but i feel so glued to him that i just never feel like doing anything else. this is the exact thing i always said i would never let happen to me, lol.
I wish I had a friend group that enjoys healthy activities and doesn't pressure me into drinking loads of alcohol.
I really hate how normal it is here to not only drink that much alcohol yourself but also pressure everyone to do the same. Even every of our office get-togethers has to involve gin tonic. If you don't drink at least two glasses people will tell the CEO that you are pregnant. They tried to do that to me but after a few months the CEO realised it wasn't true.
Just drink alcohol if you want to do so but leave other people alone. What do people gain from these games?
My bf regularly plays computer games with a girl he’s known online for a while and I hate that I feel jealous about it.
I have no reason for it, we live together and he’s never mer her, but I hate it when I want to see a movie with him and he chooses to play with her instead
>>51360>I hate it when I want to see a movie with him and he chooses to play with her instead
For spending time with other people than me?
If I had male friends I wouldn’t want him to be jealous about me hanging out with them.
I'm so tired of being someone I'm not, it's like I've been acting the way everyone expects me to so they'll like me. well I guess it's more accurate to say that I've been half-assing this 'socially acceptable' persona, which makes people dislike me because my heart isn't really into it. but I'm scared that if I act more like myself they'll definitely, 100% hate me
I don't think anybody knows the real me and it just sucks
What is the real you?
And i feel you. I stopped and started just being completely genuine, only doing things what i like automatically and my happiness soared.
Did you talk to him about it?
Maybe he just prefers playing games instead of watching movies. You could ask him to play games together. If he declines it might be her company that he prefers.
He's cheating on you 100%, at least emotionally. Don't even doubt it. I'm with the other anon, dump him. It's not just a "friend" if he chooses her over you.
i'm in limerence with someone online and hundreds of miles away. i'll never tell him about my shallow feelings because i value our time together more than potentially ruining those moments. we also don't know each other beyond the virtual realm and are in different life stages. he probably doesn't see me like how i see him despite spending a lot of time together on our shared hobby. telling myself the above stops me from escaping too hard. dunno. reciprocated feelings would be too good to be true. we'd only be falling in love with one another's personas without their flaws. i want to find someone who has his strengths and love language and actually love them. i want to be more secure in myself to not quietly depend on him for little serotonin shots throughout the day.
>>51371>It's not just a "friend" if he chooses her over you.
I don't think "spends as much time with SO as humanly possible" is necessarily the mark of a good relationship. People need space, and socialization with others.
Most people tend to choose other people/things over their gf/bf at least some of the time.
TIL a cool new word, thx anon
I actually had this happen to me recently on the receiving end and you're right about how falling in love with eachother's personas is just bad news. You could try playing it safe and get to know him before admitting any feelings- if it turns out you don't really want a deeper connection you can pull back and return to serotonin shots.
How do I tell my mom I love her? We never say it to each other and it would feel extremely awkward. We also had a fight last year that I never got over and our relationship just sucks. I feel really depressed. Sometimes I think how horrible I’d feel if she died because I never told her I loved her. How do I do this without making it feel awkward?
Maybe write her a letter? Or next time you give her a birthday or Xmas card, write a short note in it. You can also do it without words such as buying her flowers and doing other nice things for her from time to time.
Thank you anon. I think the next time I am out of the house I will buy her something.
>be middle school teacher
>huge crush on another teacher
>not only is he not interested, he's fucking bi and has a husband
He's politely turned down all my advances but tbh that just makes me want to try harder. am I a huge cunt for spending some lonely nights seriously considering trying to fuck up his marriage and step into the vacuum or is that a natural thing to be tempted towards?
give it up anon, he's not interested don't embarrass yourself
If you ruin his marriage he's still not going to want you.
This is embarrassing to read. Stop thinking with your vagina.
wtf I thought straight women didn't like bi men
tbh women either really want a bi bf they can check boys out with uwu or wouldn't touch them with a six foot pole
When my boyfriend still was together with his ex he often talked about how much he loved her with his friends, I asked them if he's talked about me the same way and they said no.
Should I be jelly? Whenever he talks about her to me he says that she was a psycho and that he never really loved her.
Yeah thats sus. Consider getting another bf on the side then dumping his ass. Thats so fucked up.
I don't get the other replies, he didn't do anything wrong, did he? Maybe he grew up and stopped being so candid about such things? Some people also overcompensate by putting on a perfect relationship show to others when there's actually trouble in paradise, maybe that's what he was doing with his friends? Either way, it's stupid to dump him just because you're jelly of the ex, try to talk to him about it first.
>>51406>When my boyfriend still was together with his ex he often talked about how much he loved her with his friends>Whenever he talks about her to me he says that she was a psycho and that he never really loved her
It's possible that it really was a terrible relationship and he just talked her up in an effort to convince other people (and maybe himself) that she wasn't so bad. Sunken cost and all that.
If he was still
talking about her to his friends as though she was great (and saying the opposite to you,) I think that'd be a red flag. But I don't think the fact that he did it at the time and has since changed his tune is necessarily something to worry about. There could be a few different explanations for it.
My dad used to be a professor. I went on one of those “rate your professor” websites to see what his rating was and all his reviews were bad and now i feel sad.
Why do I feel sad? It just made me feel bad for him. I get scared about stuff like that because he’s depressed. I don’t want him to see the reviews.
no i meant why are his reviews bad what did they not like about him
people were saying he was really unclear, that tons of people ended up dropping out, that he taught students as if they had "been doing it for years" and confused them more. it seriously made me so depressed. five different students all gave him 1-2 stars out of 5.
What the fuck that’s much worse>I wish my boyfriend showed me more affection >time to cheat on him, break his trust and leave him
you can cheer him up if he ever does end up reading them by saying its just students who were too dumb to belong in the program anyways
no clue if thats true or if he really is just a shit prof though
I recently peak transed and now i feel kinda bad bc i have a decent amount of tra friends and even a really close tim i've been friends with for years
i feel shitty but at the same amount of time i feel like im not really helping my friend by playing into his delusion but I know that we'd stop being friends if i made my radfem feelings clear
ultimately i dont plan to out myself, expressing radfem beliefs to my normie friends is usually agreeable unless i call it being a radfem
There's a difference between meeting a group of old friends or playing games in a group and spending time with this one girl he met online. A guy in a relationship doesn't need to spend time alone with another girl.
Anon has three options here:
1. you talk to him and tell him it is unacceptable to choose a random internet girl over his gf; I'd require to see every chat log too, to make sure he wasn't cheating. He can get a male videogame buddy.
2. you leave;
3. you wait until he inevitably leaves you for her.
3 is going to happen, you can be sure of that. It is a question of time until the other girl gives him a green light.
>>51440>A guy in a relationship doesn't need to spend time alone with another girl
And I suppose a woman in a relationship shouldn't be allowed to have any male friends?
Not op but there is a difference between hanging out(a few hours) vs spending hours with someone, who isnt in the relationship, everyday.
Also taken women shouldnt have straight male friends. The world isnt ideal, very few men respect friendships. From personal experince they tends to think theres something more just because youre being friendly, because you want to be friends. They dont always see it like that.
Besides the boyfriend sounds like hes cheating. At least emotionally hes providing all of his attention to a girl online and putting her first.
Does this other girl know about you?
No boyfriend would accept that his gf dumps his movie night to spend time alone with her straight male friend. Unless he has a cuck fetish.
>>51444>taken women shouldnt have straight male friends>they tends to think theres something more
And then you get sucked into a relationship with them and start cheating on your bf, just like that?
Free will or critical thinking or anything doesn't factor into the equation at any point for either side?
You make it sound like it's completely impossible for men and women to have platonic friendships. OP said herself that he's never even met the girl IRL, you think he's going to uproot his life and run away to be with her because he has fun playing video games with her a few times a week?
What about women who date guys who are bisexual? Or women who are bisexual themselves? Can they just never have any friends at all because every person they meet is a potential romantic partner that would compete with their bf/gf?
I can't tell if you're a moid or a girl in the same situation as the "other girl" and want to rationalize it. >OP said herself that he's never even met the girl IRL
That's precisely what makes it sure he is cheating. She is not some cherished old friend. She is some rando he met online. She should be utterly unimportant to him in relation to his own real life girlfriend. Why isn't he playing with a male? Why do you think a guy in a relationship needs an online female "friend"?>What about women who date guys who are bisexual?
The dynamics of same-sex attraction in bisexuality are completely different. It is entirely possible for a bisexual guy to engage with a dude in friendly banter without wanting to suck his penis. But a guy who lives with his girlfriend meeting a random girl online and ditching precious time with his girlfriend to "play" with her? When has this ever not lead to cheating?
>>51450>Why isn't he playing with a male? Why do you think a guy in a relationship needs an online female "friend"?
Because people aren't completely identical and interchangeable? Do you know what friendship is?
Some people are weak will and will cheat with someone who is giving them more attention then their partner.
And yes people do uproot their whole lives to be with their lovers. Its not unheard of. Just because they live together doesnt stop the cheating. Which could be all the more reason why he rather play with this girl then spend time with his gf. From the sounds of it he rather spend more time with her. He might not even be aware that hes emotionally cheating.
You are ignoring the fact that this is simply an online relationship. She should not come close to the importance of his real life girlfriend. If he is not able to throw away this meaningless online fling if she asked him to, he could at least prefer to spend time with his girlfriend instead of sitting on a computer playing games with some nebulous chick he has never met like an autist. I would have dumped him faster than light.
>>51456>this is simply an online relationship>If he is not able to throw away this meaningless online fling
I ask again, do you know what friendship is?
Do you think it's impossible to make friends via the Internet or something?
You're acting like this person is just some Tinder match he's known for a week.
Yes, it is quite impossible to have a female online friend as a straight guy. If you think it is possible, you must not have had many online interactions. But OP will see. These cases always end the same way.
>Yes, it is quite impossible to have a female online friend as a straight guy.
moid rhetoric, and you believe it
Why are you speaking from the perspective of a straight male guy? Also blatantly untrue. I've had a straight male internet friend for nearly a decade.
My absolute best friend for the past 6 years or so is a straight dude. We do a lot of stuff together. I doubt i'm the exception. And if anything, its much more likely that i'd catch feelings before he does.
What makes you believe that it's impossible?
lol ok, good to know you'd be ok with your boyfriend ditching you to spend time with an online gamer gurrrl~ "friend". OP, don't forget to update us when he leaves.
Aww that's so sad :(. I'd feel terrible if it happened with one of my parents too. Maybe he is just tired after so many years of teaching and doesn't have the same energy anymore. Make sure to hug him and/or tell him you love him a lot, anon! Our lives aren't defined by our job skills.
well anon, its been 8 days and im sure you wont read this but if youre out there just know that a random stranger on the internet felt for you. i hope you find your people. godspeed
why am i so fucking socially awkward my friend said 'i love you' and i answered 'you're welcome' kill me please
I'm not schizo enough to go off on a hypothetical bf because they have other girls as friends.
That kind of shit takes too much energy that could be spent in healthier ways.
And besides, the only guys who stay with the "dont talk to other girls but me" types are way too submissive for my taste.>>51494
Thats reallhy embarrassing.
Hopefully you just played it off as a joke and gave the answer you wanted to
maybe it's a good thing i'm not famous, i'd probably hate most of my fans
>>51450>But a guy who lives with his girlfriend meeting a random girl online and ditching precious time with his girlfriend to "play" with her?>When has this ever not lead to cheating?
For starters, given it's the Internet, she could potentially live on a different continent or something.
>buy these out of curiosity
>they’re pretty good
>I pour the majority of them out into my bedroom trashcan so I don’t eat them all and regret it/feel sick (i have no self control lol!)
>be me after dinner and brushing my teeth
>literally reach my arm into the trashcan to get a handful of the gummies to eat
I have done this multiple times with different foods and I know it’s gross. I usually spray the food I throw out with some cleaning product so I don’t try to dig it up to eat it but I forgot this time
>>51518> I usually spray the food I throw out with some cleaning product so I don’t try to dig it up to eat it but I forgot this time
What does this reaction image convey
I'd recommend just putting them down the garbage disposal, but gummies specifically would probably not be good for it, especially a lot of them.
Just eat them all and then buy bad foods less often.
buy a smaller packet next time
I love peach rings, but they're sickingly sweet. I can only have a few at a time.
But you're not the only one with habits like that>eating a container of burger king fries>fall asleep in my chair>wake up>the fries are ice cold, and they dont taste good when reheated>throw the bag away in the trash near my desk>a few hours later>too lazy to get up and go to the kitchen>fish through the trash and grab the fries and finish them, despite not liking them cold
Happens more than i'd like to admit.
But the trash is all stuff that I put there myself, so the most disgusting part is the idea that they were in the trash, not that the food itself became gross after putting It there
I cant judge at all
>>51547>I cant judge at all
Thank you anon ily
>>51395>am I a cunt for wanting to be a homewrecker?
Oh man, it's not often I get witness stupidity in all its glory.
>>51401>wtf I thought straight women didn't like bi men
/pol/ or other stupid place like /r9k/ told you that right?>>51395
Is his husband good looking? you can get 2x1.
when you ask a woman if she prefers a straight man to a bi man, she will say yes, thinking about it in theory and with all else being equal. but ultimately she will just be attracted to whoever she is attracted to and it won’t really matter if she likes him. it’s a small subset of women with a strong aversion to bisexuals who will dislike such a man. unless he talks about cock constantly like a faggot, then any self-respecting woman wouldn’t consider him a viable romantic option.
This tbh. Propose a lewd sandwich situation to him anon, maybe you'll get lucky.
Was dating a bi guy for nearly a decade. He figured out he's gay and had already been involved with some other guy for nearly a year before he broke up with me yesterday. When I asked why he still had sex with me recently, he said he "was still figuring himself out". God, I wanna fucking fade from existence.
I mean I suggested that because that way she doesn't gets the moral burden of making somebody cheat. But idk getting 2 compatible bfs ain't easy thats risky lewd territory, especially dumb if you only fancy one of them but don't see yourself with the other, some have done it but imagine dealing with disagreements where them moids take too much the side of each other and thorw you under the bus. I hope they are both really impartial (unlikely).
But maybe the lewd sandwich is worth it, if you don't like them long term dump them and move on.
god i am so sorry what a piece of shit he is
based and don't buy a lot of small packets at once, it's a trap. only buy what you're going to eat in one sitting
not very "budget" i know, but it's very common for poor people to become overweight/obese due to buying high-calorie foods in bulk thinking they save money that way and then eating a lot of them in a short period of time >>51534>then buy bad foods less often
no anon that isn't how it works
you'll just get used to buying lots of sweets and eating them all at once
>>51395>screwing things up at the workplace
Another day, another autist I’ve fallen in love with over the internet…
>>51565>no anon that isn't how it works>you'll just get used to buying lots of sweets and eating them all at once
Works for me.
god i wish i had the same level of self-control or what's your secret to not just buying lots of sweets every single day?
I did used to buy things everyday because I was very low energy at the time (undiagnosed illness). I got over that by sorting the illness out. Also got over never having had sweets at home growing up which also caused me to gorge on the few ones I would have in case they were taken away.
Basically you have to find out why you are craving these things. Are you not eating enough or enough of the right things? Do you have a bad mental loop forcing you to eat things you don’t actually want? Are you trying to make yourself feel better or make up for times you didn’t have treats before?
When you still do want something, willpower is really hard so instead of denying yourself, try and reduce the cravings. You can try and find healthier foods to eat instead to subdue cravings. For example, instead of peach sweets have actual peaches.
If you still really want the sweets, just eat them and enjoy. Don’t make them into “bad” foods as that will just make you want them more and cause disordered eating.
>feel sad about being ugly
>being sad makes me lose motivation to take care of myself
>get uglier from not taking care of myself
>feel sad about being ugly
Force yourself to shower everyday, brush hair, wear nice clothes, etc. It feels like a huge chore but only less than an hour and makes a big difference to your mood.
Time passes so quickly and it's scaring me. One day all of this will be over.
NTA, but my secret is laziness.
I would eat anything in the house down to cold beans straight out of the can with a spoon before I could be bothered to go to the store to buy any food, much less candy.
Most of the food shopping is done by other people in the house as a result, and they don't buy much candy, so I just don't have a lot of it to eat.
To a lesser extent, I can't even be bothered to walk downstairs to the kitchen 90% of the time.
I lost like 20 lbs after I left college just due to no longer having a minifridge within arm's reach at all times.
Tips for lying to mental health professionals to avoid your habitual swathe of denial coming undone?
I have been maladaptive daydreaming for two days, barely moving out of bed. Help.
What are you dreaming about?
Try listening to a body scan meditation video maybe? In my experience, it can help ground you in your body so you stop day dreaming so much. Also, force yourself to go through some sort of workout video, something fairly intense, and focus on the soreness/fatigue you feel in your body, that can also help get you out of your head.
Oh finally a place where I can dump shit im concerned about. This will probably unreadable in some parts because feels are hard so sorry in advance
When I had friends in high school I still felt like I was on the bottom rung on the friendship ladder. I've since moved physically away from them and even if I dont talk to them anymore, it kind of fucking sucks that neither of them have even tried to talk to me or see how I'm doing. Maybe its hypocritical of me or maybe it's better I stopped contacting them since they were jerks in their own subtle ways, who knows.
I'm not a virgin anymore and I have a bf in a long distance relationship, but the fact that I never had a physical connection with anyone irl really is fucking me up bad. Sure my bf and I see each other since we live about 4 hours away by train but STILL not having anyone in my area to spend time makes me want to neck myself. I know I should be thankful I dont have to put up with a majority of moid bullshit but I feel like im missing out and salty whenever one of my friends talks about the dates she's going on, how cute he is, etc. The prospect of meeting a guy I might like in school terrifies me, but at the same time I'm probably never going to meet a guy that likes the same stuff as me, or wouldn't shame me for baggage or being really shy, whatever projection guys always engage in
Despite all this I recently got prescribed birth control that might help with my PMDD, and im starting to feel just the slightest motivation that eventually things are going to be ok if I work through each problem one step at a time. Fingers crossed that its the one thing that helps me out of my depression and weight gain slump
thanks anon. i suspected things like that but never actually got into what could it be or i ruled them out.
i'm dealing with a hormonal illness right now so it kinda shows, too.>>51602>tfw you're too lazy/unmotivated to do anything BUT getting up to eat>>51624>feel like im missing out
true. you're missing out on creepy physical shit moids do.
>not a virgin anymore>never had a physical connection
"Not having a physical connection" meaning i don't have anyone to spend time with whenever, it still feels empty if I only get to see my bf every couple of months
i've had a few twitter accounts and i'm always sad that not one has surpassed 20 followers, and that i've never been able to make any friends from twitter. idk seeing that other people can and do but i can't? so lame
You need to join some sort of community and tweet content related to that. No one wants to follow a random whose content is all over the place.
Tired of the monotony of social media.
I’m so desperate for a bf I would even take a tr**n at this point.
just don't even a weird as shit /r9k/ or /soc/ bf is better than a tranny.
not much point in getting a bf if theyre just gonna be seething with jealousy towards you and eventually off themselves
What the fuck is wrong with me? Why do I catch feelings so fast through text when I don't catch feelings with people when I interact in person?
I've lost contact with all my irl friends and every year it feels like my online friend group just gets smaller and smaller. I'd like to reach out to people but I just have nothing to talk about. Like it would just be "hi" "what's up?" and the convo would die there.
I used to be ridiculously bad conversation for a long while, and then I decided to start talking to randos from /soc/ to get better.
I'd be willing to bet that most of them are just as bad, if not worse than how bad you think you are at conversation.
A trick that I learned from my time there is to always try to get the other person to talk about their experiences. Even the most autistic of autists love to do that.
A basic conversation starter I usually go for is "Heya,what's the gameplan for today?" since that usually avoids the "nothing much" response that you'd get by asking "what are you up to?"
But you should probably reword it since the way I talk is pretty cringe.
Even if you're completely uninterested in what they're talking about, ask questions or try to relate what they're saying into your own experiences.
If they're listening to music, ask for recommendations. If they're playing a game get them to gush about it to you. Etc etc etc
However, not even I can get the people who give one word replies to speak more.
>>51710>Even if you're completely uninterested in what they're talking about
NTA, but the thing is, I wish I was
I've got no real personal relationships because I can't find it in me to care about the details of people's lives. I've tried adding people from /soc/, and we exchange greetings and maybe have a short conversation, and then we literally never speak to each other again because they never message me, and I never message them because why would I?
I have this very generalized desire to connect with people, but on an individual level I've never really met anyone who I'd want to go out of my way to speak to again. It always feels like a waste of time, or that there are things I could be doing instead that I actually want to do.
Other people seem to enjoy making small talk and stuff like that.
It feels like something's wrong with me.
what about the details of your life
is anyone else extremely paranoid about their online presence? like being cyberstalked or doxxed and the like. i don’t use social media much anymore and am a complete nobody but did a lot of embarrassing things when i was younger that i can’t really delete. i’m terrified of people keeping watch over my accounts and making fun of me. makes me scared to interact with anyone because i can’t trust them. maybe lolcow is starting to take a toll on my psyche
I can relate anon. I don't really use social media anymore either and all of my (now inactive) accounts are on private. I wish my younger self had taken those internet safety psa thingies more seriously; the thought of the stupid shit I did online resurfacing one day keeps me up at night.
Send a fake DMCA and it will be removed.
hi anons. im seeking some insight, or maybe wisdom
i have always felt inferior to most people as long as i remember. to be brief, i have never felt i have a place to belong. i have a couple friends and a boyfriend but i can only relate to them all to a certain extent (my boyfriend the most, which im grateful for) the thing that is bothering me is remembering some discord communities/overall online 4chan esque communities i used to be in. they were bpd schizophrenic unemployed drug users but they all seemed so much more intelligent and cooler than me. i always envied them, i wanted to be them so bad despite knowing they were also “losers”. some people would be nice, some mean, but for some reason it would genuinely hurt me. id get panic attacks feeling like i wasnt good enough. this has also happened in a community of really sweet artists i was in once.
the feeling is terrible. it makes me so anxious to the point of vomiting, even with things like scrolling through prettier girls on instagram. i dont know what to do about this and have tried to love myself more, but i cant rid the feeling of wanting to be somebody else or wondering if im really me.
i wish i was a bpd drug addict girl that everyone liked. but instead im weak, reserved, and in my own world.
i wish i was e famous or something as well but i dont like zoomer culture. i just want to be adored and not feel inferior. i try to continue doing what makes me happy personally each day, but even then i question if its what i should do. i question if i should shift my path to be cool and adored.
people say thats now who i should want to be, but ive seen multiple instances of those types of girls who are very well liked and get everything they want. so i wonder if i should start to become that.
you won't like being the bpd drug addict girl once you're her.
Unless you suddenly get tons of followers nothing will happen. So many people posted way more offensive things that you propably did. In case it is really bad, try to delete anything showing your face and name and start over with a new account. Keep it small and only inferact with people for fun, not to gather followers.
I used to have a blog where I whined about real life things. The platform died so it's pretty much gone. For todays standards I would have definitely been lolcow material but I've never been popular enough to been mentioned anywhere that I know of. Sometimes I wonder if any of the personal lolcow posts is about me, lol
may i ask why? if i already dislike myself now, could it be worse? i just want to be careless and adored.
I have bad news for you, you can't unilaterally be adored and not also considered inferior by some. To be adored for something is to fail at something else. No one who values physical strength, or financial know how, gives a rat's ass about Stephen Hawking other than admitting he's smarter than them. You make it sound like you aren't smart. I would think that if you were beautiful you would be aware. You don't sound socially competent or connected, so that's a bust for popularity. You don't sound like your very competent in any field either. I have good news though, there is still a path open to being superior. The only option you have left is being the most hard working at something, anything. Writing books, running a business, being a good employee, lifting weights. I don't give a fuck. Your only option if you desire the feeling of superiority is to work yourself and work yourself hard. Don't tyrannize yourself, you are a human after all, lazy and feeble. You have to bargain and barter with yourself to get yourself moving.
You also have the option of getting on prescription adderall if you need some get up and go.
>>51719>i wish i was a bpd drug addict girl that everyone liked. but instead im weak, reserved, and in my own world.
I felt this way once. After entering the adult social sphere I realized quickly people prefer charming yet dysfunctional individuals. They also don't take well to teetotalers.
Difference is I'm happiest alone. I generally dislike interacting with others 90% of the time because maintaining relationships is annoying. So while my ego is bruised when I fail at being an attention-and-love magnet, it would be a shitshow if I was. I cut all my friends out even now so it would be worse by tenfold.
When you're a person like this you learn to love yourself faster than the BPDfags and extroverts. Who else is there to validate me? Some random who will get on my nerves in a month (side note: not their fault)? Why would I change who I am and harm myself for temporary people?
Is my advice just isolate yourself socially and immerse yourself in hobbies? Maybe. You're around yourself the most even if you're not a loner, might as well love and take care of her.
I'm going to reread the first ever femslash I ever wrote 13 years ago…
It'll have all the feeling of a slow and painful death but without the death ಥ_ಥ.
I have finished reading it..
And now to faint!
>none of them are seeding
Dark Souls 2 is better than Dark Souls 1
my bf keeps cheating on me he keeps doing blow and lying to me about it and whenever he does blow he starts talking to other girls he hasnt done anything physical yet but he doesn't stop no matter how many times i catch him he always freaks out and punches himself in the head out of remorse our fights always end up getting physical because i try to make him quit and he shoves me away or hits me on accident and i have a bpd meltdown and start self harming (hitting my arms) and he pulled my arms back so hard i screamed in pain he almost dislocated my shoulder the side of his face is swollen this is so fucked up and it's because he fucking cheats on me for some reason i literally cant afford to break up with him and i dont even want to because other than this specific issue he's been so good to me whenever he isnt doing blow he's absolutely incredible he's my soulmate he loves me in a way ill probably never be loved by anybody else and he has for years he takes care of me he got me away from my abusive parents and if i lose him ill probably have to go right back i'm such a fucking wreck i cant tell anyone about this because im so fucking humiliated
realise the real truth and dump the fucking rubbish
you deserve much, much better than this fuckwad.
>hits me on accident
no such thing. moids always do that to hurt you. no other reason.
>he's my soulmate he loves me in a way ill probably never be loved by anybody else
is that really "love"? if he truly loved you he would never do that shit. it's not love and it's way better to be completely alone than being in a relationship with a person who actively tries to hurt and destroy you
>he got me away from my abusive parents and if i lose him ill probably have to go right back
why? you don't have to live with either anon. you could ask your friends to pay rent together or buy a really cheap apartment somewhere and start there
>i cant tell anyone about this because im so fucking humiliated
this isn't shameful and it isn't your fault, shit happens to everyone. you posting on this website and seeking solutions to your problems is the most important step.
i do rent a relatively cheap apartment and its under my name but im just now at the point where i can afford it and food/gas at the same time which is solely because of his help, when i was the only one paying bills i was living on like $20 a month, plus jobs aren't really available rn. doesnt help me and bf work in the same place. as for friends/roommates, unfortunately last time i tried that this happened: >>48486
and nowadays i dont have friends. i don't really have anybody else or anywhere else right now
>>51804>doesnt help me and bf work in the same place.
well if you're on good terms with your boss and your job doesn't only have one site you could ask to relocate yourself i guess? honestly i have no idea how this works
>i don't really have anybody else or anywhere else right now
idk where you live but in my country we have websites to find rentmates, but you have to be careful and choose women preferably, maybe she could even become your friend or at least help you with something
since she's gonne be a new person in your life she wouldn't do that crazy shit and you could have an agreement to not invite boyfriends i guess?
He sounds like an absolute sack of shit that's taking advantage of your financial and mental vulnerability. Do you have any irl friends whatsoever that you can move in with, to at least distance yourself from him? If not then seriously, please look into people looking for roomies in your area in general.
On that note how to find a guy that won't cheat? It seriously seems like all men cheat nowadays. Doesn't matter how good you are or how hot you are, seems to be an obsession with bloating their ego with having multiple women, plus men easily get crushes on other women for the most shallow of reasons. I'm about to take the blackpill on relationships and just spend my days daydreaming abt 2d men, seriously. Is it possible to find even a decent man?
>>51802>moids always do that to hurt you. no other reason.
To be fair,>he always freaks out and punches himself in the head
it sounds like he isn't exactly in a sound state of mind to begin with.
I agree that she should break up with him, though. Either that or get him into an actual drug rehab program or something.
my depression is kicking my ass really hard. i miss my mother and home state a lot, growing up is difficult and it sucks having no friends. its nice to have my boyfriend, and if i ever did go home id be alone again. i have really awful social skills and too many insecurities. at least i start my new job in two weeks, and while it will be really draining i think its going to help my depression. i dont like being a neet, but hopefully after some time at my new job ill be able to find a part time one or go back to school and have some balance because i dont need the fulltime job forever.
depression really makes for brain soup. i sleep so much lately and i am so incoherent, so sorry if the vent seems preschool esque.
There's this E-girl that my boyfriend used to be romantically involved with whose semi-famous for moaning over VOIP in games, and one day, he was screen-sharing and showing his history to try and find a link, and I saw her profile in his history extremely often. Multiple times a day he'd visit her profile, every single day.
So naturally, I was a bit insecure.
She was emotionally manipulative too. Claimed to have a brain tumor, and would use that as an excuse to treat people badly, strung guys along, and tried to guilt trip people into giving her cash, but gets fidgety and evasive every-time anyone asks about the severity of the tumor. I had always been skeptical she even had it in the first place just because nothing was adding up, but didn't say anything 'cause I'm jealous, and I thought it'd look like I was just trying to paint her badly.
I get distant sometimes due to depression, and he and that girl started talking again, and they would talk every single day, and he'd vent to her about me being distant. It made me so uncomfortable. I asked to see their chat logs, and they were subtly flirting with each other (joking about how she should swallow, etc). I broke up with him for some time. Then, he cut her out of his life for me after far too fuckin' long, but I still haven't been able to get over it, and I dunno if I'm being unreasonable or not.
He cheated on his last ex, and I didn't find out until a few days ago. He always kept that hidden from me out of shame. His dad is a cheater, and had a mental breakdown a couple months ago, wondering if he's "becoming his father," and I'm adding all the pieces together, and wondering if he cheated on me, and I just don't know it.
>>51860>used to be romantically involved with>Multiple times a day he'd visit her profile, every single day>they would talk every single day>he'd vent to her>they were subtly flirting with each other
>I dunno if I'm being unreasonable
No, that's definitely going way beyond just being friends. It was super shitty of him to do that, and I don't blame you for breaking up with him.
yeah anon hes absolutely not worth your time, sounds like a scumbag
You're not being unreasonable, as much as some people like to like to you cheating is something relationships never go back from. Things aren't ever the same after that, even if he gets better. Throw him out.
long embarrassing blog
my eating habits suck. i had a period of time where i would restrict on-and-off but i could never keep my weight down for long. around that same time is when my sleep schedule started to get really messed up, so i was up later. the combination of not eating in the day and staying up late made me crack and now i feel like i have to eat at nighttime even when i’m not hungry. i eat a bunch of gross unhealthy food, feel guilty and disgusting about it and tell myself i’m turning over a new leaf, stay on whatever diet for like a week and then get an intense craving for fast food and it starts all over again. i ate like 4 or 5 donuts last week. plus whenever someone offers me food i never turn them down. i wish i had self control, i just feel like a pig sometimes. does anyone else have this issue?
i have the same issue where i can never say no to offered food. i feel like it's impolite to say no when someone offers so i always end up eating it even when i'm not hungry. i was also taught at a young age to eat everything off your plate and my family would always pile my plate to high heaven, making me eat more than what was necessary. i have no self control either and will eat past the point of satiation.
i think you should keep a food diary and record when you feel hungry. and you should ask yourself before grabbing food "am i hungry enough to eat an apple right now?" if the answer is yes, proceed to eat. if no, you're either bored or have a craving, and your body isn't actually hungry. it's important to recognize hunger cues like stomach growling, your body feels weak, unfocused mind etc. or else you're just eating unnecessary calories.
you should try to surround yourself with healthier food options to prevent binges on unhealthy foods. avoid buying junk food. if it isn't in reach, then you won't eat it in the first place. you should try to have pre-cut fruits and veggies as snacks so you can easily grab it when you feel the need to munch on something.
i was an ex-fatty and these methods helped me lose 80 lbs.
This is probably going to make me sound like a tranny but I really hate it when people misgender me. ik I'm not the most feminine girl out there but when someone calls me hijo instead of hija or el instead of ella I get really offended
i guess i have a fragile sense of femininity
My boyfriend is kind of judgemental about my life and there's many details I don't talk about because I'm afraid of being critiqued that I'm mired in the past. But he says things like "I take my parents for granted" when a huge chunk of the reason I act that way is because I was sexually abused by my brother for years and when I told them they did nothing (granted by then the abuse had stopped, but still) except make me forgive him and then they got angry at me when I eventually told the police via another person who I talked to. I got told I ripped the family apart, etc. There's more details, but the point is, it is hard for me to love them in a certain way after that, especially since they wanted me to go to the same college as my brother and hey didn't teach me driving and had me driven by him to school.
My boyfriend knows they were involved in trying to cover everything up, but he doesn't know the more fucked up details because again, I'm scared of being accused of being stuck in the past. But I dislike his judgements. He never had anything comparable occur with his parents and he loves them whereas I do care about mine, but I just don't feel attached in the same way and I feel like he thinks I'm like that because I'm white or something but it's not, it's because my parents hurt me. I understand they were in a difficult position as everyone tells me to think of them.
The more I learn about nutrition that more I lose weight because I get sick just thinking about how everything easily accessible is basically poison
Less of a vent and more just sending my worry out into the world so it's not all in my head.
Mom's had multiple "strokes" ovdr the past few weeks (mainly the left side of her face seizing up). She had already gone to our GP who concluded it wasn't strokes and gave her some vitamins. Then it happened again last saturday, this time even worse while she was at work. She called me and asked me to drive her to the hospital. That's the last time I really saw her.
They scanned her on monday and it's not a stroke but a cyst. I don't know if that's better or worse but they'll operate her this week.
It sucks, I can't see her and I had a few break downs. My dad died in 2018 pretty abruptly during an overnight stay at the hospital and not being with him in his last few hours fucking kills me. Mom is all I really have left since me and my siblings aren't that close.
I'm trying to keep it together tho, keeping the house clean, doing laundry, not saying anything at my job. God the human body is ass though.
Old friend who I'm not on good terms with has an embarrassing secret on me and she's holding it over my head. Pretty sure she's told people about it which kind of sucks, especially at my job, everyone treats me funny.
next September i'm going to live with several of my coursemates, including a girl who was in love with me for a period (we're bi) i rejected her due to the fact we were both in the same course, i was unsure how i felt about her at the time, she appeared to have an on/off bf, she was rather pushy with her advances and because we have a mutual friend, another course mate, who liked her.
After gently rejecting her, she rebounded right away with our mutual friend who likes her and the two have had a "more than friends but we're not dating uwu" relationship whilst the girl who liked me adamantly denies liking our mutual friend and saying that she would much prefer dating a girl, particularly a girl in our group (mutual friend is a male)
after i told mutual friend that she has an on/off bf he flipped out, they had an argument and then weeks later they continued their pseudo relationship with the only thing changing being that mutual friend-kun now has a more cynical view of rebounder-chan and their relationship whilst still liking her the same
theyre at the point now that they're on the cusp of actually dating each other and everyone in our group can see it going this direction and despite rebounder-chans moments of disloyalty she does appear to like him back
we've all warned mutual friend-kun but he's aware of what he's getting into and we've all said all we can say at this point
anyway, my concern here is a selfish one, my relationship with mutual friend-kun is a rather vitriolic one and he's been harsher with me than he would others due to rebounder-chan having liked me, the fact that he's a rebound is something he clearly resents me a bit for
so my worry is that when i actually live with these people and they start actually dating, mutual friend-kun will go from resenting me to actually disliking me as the woman his gf used to actually love (rebounder-chan has kissed another girl in our house share but im the only one shes confessed romantic feelings for aside from mutual friend-kun)
another worry is that i have is that rebounder-chan will let our friendship dwindle down since she wants to prove to mutual friend-kun that she's loyal now
best case scenario, they date briefly and then break up before we actually live together but i don't know if i can count on that
anyway any advice guys?
im feeling awful lately thinking about my future and what to make of it. i moved in with my boyfriend in september but there really is nothing for us here so im trying to move back to my home state when our lease is up, that way we’ll be closer to my family and i also have insurance/my psychiatrist/my college and we will overall be in a nicer area. he is really excited as well because he dislikes where we live at the moment. im working to get my license and so is he and i begin a new fulltime job soon. with that said, im worried about my future and what choices to even fucking make now and im worried ill never find my path. ive been doing better lately with my anxiety but his brother who is living with us and currently moving out. (said he was moving to home state with us, then wasnt, then offered to take me to the new job, then isnt, and now ill be spending $150 or more a week just to get rides until i can get my license) when we move my mom said she can help us a bit if needed until we have money coming in, and my home state isnt where id ideally like to be but its the best option right now for me and im grateful she is willing to help if we need. i was hoping i could just do college fulltime while my boyfriend works fulltime but i understand he may need me to chip in so id probably have to get a part time job which sucks because i wouldnt be able to focus solely on school and would probably have to do part time classes as well just overall setting me back. and i want time for hobbies because its something id like to make a future out of one day too if possible. i know this is life but it feels awful, and maybe im overthinking it. i feel like i was such a dreamer, thinking id find a perfect career or be able to just focus on classes and my hobbies. im not even working my new job yet and im worried so much. we could stay here another year or so, but my mom really wants me to come home and i just worry due to insurance and my psychiatrist (id have to fly up there every couple of months just to see her) if we stayed another year it would enable me to focus on school fulltime without needing to work but im not sure if its worth it.
ive worked fulltime before, ive worked a job and taken classes simultaneously before, so its not like its new, and i managed it but it took a toll on me. im wondering if i should abandon college. im so lost, truly. ive been looking into religion again, or some sort of guidance for myself. what i really want is an online business or career in music or art! thats my biggest dream. but i have so much to work on with those 3 things and i know it isnt realistic… so i was going to continue college and pursue forensics (my “realistic” career goal). now im debating haha communications? or scrap college! be an egirl or something! i hate being an adult and i know its just how it is, im sorry to be a whiny bitch. i dont mind working hard to get where i need to be in life but i just want to follow the right path for myself and not be so stressed out and using my time for the wrong things. ultimately i know im the only one who can make these choices but i feel like i just need some outside opinion or to at least get it out.
my mom is slowly descending to dementia, the human body does suck sometimes
it fucking sucks, i hate it man
Is this source of your anxiety what is going on around you, or your thoughts dwelling on what is going around you ?
both, but more so my thoughts and dwelling.
that's good, thoughts are much easier to control than your surroundings
I've haven't played Dark Souls 2, but it seems that the majority opinion is it's worse than Dark Souls 1, have you watched MatthewMatosis's review of Dark Souls 2?
I would do almost anything to actually have a close female friend. I'm tired of talking to a woman and either having little or nothing in common with her or meeting yet another egirl pickme starved of male attention. Where can I meet another woman to talk to? Do I have to just get lucky?
Join some groups IRL so you have something in common and try to build up a friendship from there. Be prepared that it won’t happen instantly and there will be failed attempts.
I moved out right before COVID and I still had no chance to find IRL friends because of how fucked things are.
I can't even find a job and it's been a full year because I am an immigrant and the whole country started hating my nation now… I see so much shittalk about my nation everywhere on the news and social media. I can't even truly learn the language yet because everything around is closed, so I am doing my best to learn it alone.
On top of that right before I moved a lot of friends whom I thought were friends ended up doing nothing but using silly me: I would help them out with anything, spend all of my time and energy listening to them just for them to end up turning their back on me the second it became possible. And my closest duo were talking shit about me the whole time and laughing at my problems.
Finding friends on internet turned into nothing but a disaster because it'd mostly be thristy scrotes who would be interested in you only if you are single, or would still hit on you even if you are taken. Or just people who can't handle conversation well, or huge timezone differences.
To make things short, I am out there feeling miserable because of the dumbest thing: my partner's friend kicked me out of his server where he would stream his movies and I didn't notice until that happened, but friend thinks it's nbd because I am with my partner IRL and we are not too close, but here I am, feeling like a complete shit and just wanting to do nothing but cry and go to sleep. I feel so stupid for feeling so sensitive over such thing.
I thought today would be good, but it started like shit. Went to a huge store so I could finally get limited edition ice cream, just to see that it got sold out and there are won't be any until next year. I also had to take care of my partner's panic attack because there were a lot of people.
I sound super whiny, but I also appreciate my old friends who are still with me and I cherish them, but their irl lives are very busy now, so they barely spend any time on social media so I can't spend time with them.
I just feel so lonely.
>>51973> I feel so stupid for feeling so sensitive over such thing.
well, i would feel upset over it, too. friend could do with being a bit less callous.
You must be Chinese. I feel you.
Things will get better just survive this mess.
Stop having a stick up yours and I'm sure you'll be able to make one.
Lockdown's still going strong in my area so that's not an option, sadly. I've been trying to join discord servers but it's a complete crapshoot especially in regards to making friends, I've pretty much had the experience that >>51973
had. I think I'll just keep trying, though. Can't hurt. >>51979
I am not Chinese. I am currently living in a tiny country no one really cares about so you wouldn't find their spregouts about my nationality outside their language media.>>51982
I sadly don't want to find female friends through imageboards because of a high chance of people Learning and turning out to be trannies, I am sorry anon.
Maybe there is a chance to find female friends through some forums? However most of them are used by mid30s women so idk.
i recently turned 20 and have no idea what to do with my life. im starting a fulltime factory job soon to build up my savings again and then i plan to move back to my home state with my boyfriend as well as begin college again. i dont even know what i want to major in though. maybe being neet has caused a lot of brain fog and thrown me off track but its only been for 6 months. it hurts seeing so many put together girls with their careers on track. i like to make music and play bass, draw and write and sew but obviously those are just hobbies. i would love to have my own business one day but that should also be seen as a side thing. so right now i know i need to find a career path and i have no idea what. makes me feel like a failure and i dont really think i want to be doing entry level jobs my entire life. i mean i definitely plan on finishing my associates, but i have no clue what to do after that.
i wish i could dress the way i like but every time i see myself in those clothes i feel like a clown. whenever i prepare to go out i nearly break down crying and just end up in the same sweater and jeans i always choose. i know that these outfits would look good on somebody, just not me. sucks cause i’m wasting money on clothes i never wear too, i keep buying more thinking it’ll make me happy but obviously that doesn’t help. it’s a superficial thing to be upset over but fashion is something that always meant a lot to me so i’m sad i’m too ugly to pull it off
god i miss those days. i'd have group videochats with my tumblr friends and we'd just chill.
i was abused by my partner for years and i didn't even realize it. i put up with the constant degradation just because i was scared to be alone. that's how much of a fucking autist i am. i can't stop thinking about how much time i lost. i'm furious.
i fucking hate sociopaths.
I went through the exact same thing and I feel your rage. He was a pathological liar who fabricated stories about his past and current life. Constant lies. I believed it all for 2 years after the breakup. It really is rage-inducing not being able to call your ex out for being an abusive asshole. Luckily I got to, and then I blocked him. It felt SO good. I recommend it.
I went through this too, multiple times. My family was very hot and cold with me growing up and as a result I have a huge fear of abandonment and very low expectations for how I should be treated. I don't really feel like my life began until a few years ago when I began to see what was happening and pull out of it. Before that I always just went with what other people wanted, with little control over anything. No wonder I attracted so many abusers.
missed a presentation because I kept clicking at the wrong meeting link
I accidentally gave a job interviewer a wrong time for an interview 2x and I feel retarded and like I made myself look incompetent. We still ended up scheduling it but yeah. Someone REASSURE ME PLEASE.
tfw had only friend online for 5 years until he ghosted me for no reason at the beginning of this year and i just texted him like a month ago asking what i did ( desperation )
after telling him that it was over ( i was angry and i really regret it now. no response of course )
a month prior and i just feel so humiliated and stupid LOL i wish i hadn't sent anything i know he's seen them bc the last time i checked to see if he got back to me he had changed his profile picture and name but no response… i sound like such a stalker i'm so disgusted with myself i'm sorry about that
anyway, some things aren't meant to last i guess, even after promises of building a life and growing old together
i think he left me because i'm mentally unstable and didnt respond for a long time ( like a week or two because i was omw to go to a psych ward ) and he kept thinking i killed myself which is fair i understand, it's good to take measures for your own mental wellbeing i just wish he said something before he left is all but i know i'm not entitled to anything so it was within his right to leave
for some reason i feel really numb to this ( until i don't. ) which makes me feel insane guilt because i know that is not the way i am supposed to feel especially because he is the only person i felt has really loved me
but i can't just force myself to feel something. i feel like i'm an alien in my own body it's like i can't feel any emotions at all anymore, i don't know what's wrong with me
You clearly want to talk to him, anon. Doesn't sound like you're indifferent to it to me.
We all make stupid mistakes. You might need to toughen up and just write out an apology.
I'm admittedly a stubborn and self centered person, and even i've had to swallow my pride and apologize.
If I were in your situation, my apology would go something like:
(This is more vague since I don't you)
"Hey, I know we haven't spoken in a while, and I took some time to do a lot of self reflection and I definitely owe you an apology. Hell, multiple apologies. I've been nothing but a shithead and a source of unecessary stress for you, and for that I deeply apologize.
I understand if you don't forgive me, but I would like to be able to hang out with my best friend again like we used to."
Short, sweet, doesn't go on for too long so more conversation can happen afterward.
Definitely be more specific about what you did to make him ghost you though.
I really recommend not sitting in the chat and re-reading your apology over and over though. I just close the DM and do other things.
There are a few major rules of a decent apology though>1.) Admit what you did wrong>2.) Do not try to justify your actions or make excuses, apologize and keep it moving
I can't tell you how many genuine apologies that I see that come across as "I'm sorry that you misunderstood my intentions. If you understood what I was trying to do, you wouldn't be mad." Because they were too interested in saving face than smoothing over what went wrong.>3.) Do not guilt your target.
Apologies are inherently an emotional thing ofc, but it's infinitely better to get someone to truly accept your apology from the bottom of their heart than it would be to get someone to accept because they'd feel bad for rejecting it.
Sorry for text walling you.
Good luck! I believe in you!
I try so hard every day but my brain fog and constant intrusive thoughts make it impossible to write good research. I used to easily write in half a day what now takes me weeks to produce, and in terms of depth it's honestly useless shit when I compare it to what my colleagues do. It's like I can only access and use the most superficial basic level of knowledge, and only phrase it in clumsy overly complex prose.
I get by and still have good enough insights occasionally that I won't be fired, but I feel like shit all the time. I guess I have this childish wish that someone genuinely realized how hard I work to contribute what little I can and appreciated that I haven't given up, despite being in such a bad place psychologically, just because I love my field and it's important to get these questions right.
I'm reasonably open about my mental health, but I don't think anyone can really get it from the outside on a visceral enough level to feel any kind of appreciation, it ultimately just looks like I'm cutting corners and not that invested. But jesus christ I just try so hard.
It's going to sound lame, but brain fog is a byproduct of both the words you consume and the food.
You might want to take some time off if you can and get to a place without internet. Two weeks alone in a tranquil retreat with some books you enjoy reading- not necessarily deep or challenging stuff.
That and try to eat more eggs and organ meats. If you broke your brain, you can fix it.
fuck period. it hurts so bad!!! my belly and legs are in pain
trans wimmin would cry over this
Does anyone else relate to this at all? I have "severe mental health issues" and they are real(diagnosed) but I pretend I do not have them even when they do make it hard to function (am on NEETbux for them for example).
My family are (now) very aware that I have problems but they view everything I do that is bad as a result of having mental health issues even if I do something like leave a door open when the AC is on.
I think the reason that I dismiss I have any problems despite having them is because for starters it is another way to hate myself by thinking I am just a horrible person and lazy not mentally ill and the other is that I really would like not to associate myself with the people I see on the internet who make being mentally ill their entire identity.
I was involved in an argument recently with one of them who claimed that my mental illness is making them sick as well yet I do not bitch and scream at them at anyone and just prefer being by myself.
I said I did not even think I had any mental issues and she scoffed at me saying "why can't you work then why do you cut yourself then".
I said that is my normal it is fine I am just miserable but that is ok and I do silly things sometimes.
Am I in denial? I know I am not the same as other people and struggle to function even within a limited capacity but I just feel normal.
i am quite literally the same as a you and i absolutely hate admitting that there's something wrong with me despite being diagnosed in my head i'm normal until people ( my family ) tell me that i am not at all that because i aggressively self harm and i isolate myself ect ect ect but i don't really see the issue with it since i've always been this way i guess or maybe not i can't really remember but i'm normal enough or at least i feel that way
i absolutely don't want to ever admit that there's something wrong with me because i don't want to come off as ( like you said ) those internet people that larp or actually have mental illnesses and make that their entire personality because then people will think that i'm faking ( and then that makes me think well that must mean im actually sick then but i know im just fine )
sorry this is all over yhe place my english is not the best and i just repeated what you said but what i wanted to say was that i agree
> I migrated to a diff country and can't find a job for over a year now, working my ass off on finding clients that would order commissions, of any kind (even furry and worse stuff, I don't care because money) so I could actually help my partner with something and not feel like a huge leech
> A kid joins a community where I talk to all the time, starts doing nothing but crying about how much of a fragile person they are, and how scared they are of everything and how WOE EOE LIFE IS SOOO SAAAD ( insert any typical problem any women has gone through but make it about them ). Drops a screenshot of their tweet where they made gofundme to get themselves a PC while having a decent laptop. Not giving anything to anyone in return. Spams selfies on said gofundme and adds that they should add more.
> Says I WILL NEVER BEG FOR MONEY @ does thing above and proceeds trying to make sure people know how poor woe me they are while actually living a normal life in a normal house and wasting all of their gofundmoney on shit like an expensive app, aliexpress outfits and Fujo merch, still continues ebegging on twitter and whining in community
> It makes me snap all the time. I had a tough life since the second I was born and I got big health issues, people would always pity me and treat me in a special way cause I am weak as hell yet I meet people like this…
It really makes me think I should go "fuck it" route and start doing the same thing while showing off my body.
God fuck I hate people.
I legitimately think I have IBS but I don't want to go to the doctor.
Keep a food diary and remove common food allergies one by one from you diet as it might actually be a food allergy/intolerance.
Glad someone else feels the same I think being isolated makes it hard to tell you actually have problems even when you know you technically do.
It is not until you interact with other people that it really hits you how different you are.
If you prefer being by yourself is that even a problem? probably but I am the same and am "happiest" alone in my room laying in bed with music trying to cry because it is actually enjoyable.
I found that just giving up on life being better helped.>>52088
Whos giving them money moids I presume?
If you feel you can live with being an e whore go for it but try not to show you face I wouldn't if I was going to do that sort of thing.
Poeple who give money to that kid are stupid why can you not get that kid banned seriously fuck being in a community where someone can just ebeg
I saw a greeting message from my middle school best friend on a chatroom but all I felt at that moment was tired. Don't know how long ago he messaged me, don't want to click on the chat so he knows I've seen it, don't want to talk to him because I'm scared I might lose him again even though I haven't even got him back. I got my first phone at 15 so while I had a great childhood offline I couldn't keep in contact with other friends, and when I met them again in HS I WAS SO HAPPY. I would be the one starting conversations, they texted back for a few days, I kept waiting and waiting but it all eventually died out within a month. BUT WITH HIM WE'VE BEEN FRIENDS ON STEAM FOR 8 YEARS AND I TRIED TO TALK TO HIM 4 YEARS AGO SO WE COULD'VE MESSAGED ME BACK ANYTIME. I know I'm being selfish because I rarely message my other male friend but he actually has so many true friends and he mostly sees me as a failed attempt at getting his first girlfriend. I'm gonna message my friend today or tomorrow but I don't understand how my life got so shit that I don't even feel anything at seeing a friend I had my happiest moments with.
Coming back to say they just operated a tumor out of her skull. They couldn't get all of it and are now testing if it's benign but the doctor said it most likely isn't.
Fuck dude what's even the survival rate of brain tumors? Am I gonna have to watch my mom slowly die? I'm not ready to be an orphan.
That is very tough anon you cope as bet you can it is ok to be sad and cry it out good luck.
I read that fasting in rats has been as effective as chemotherapy for killing tumours you should be able to find the same research paper by googling it.
god fuck that shit
finally found a torrent of the LOTR musical soundtrack, and there's no fucking seeders
Graduating from college soon, and I cheated on literally every exam, have great grades, and learned next to nothing about my major. I hope business majors aren't expected to be geniuses in the workplace. I think I might have really goofed, the past four years of slacking off and being lazy was nice though. It's like I was a neet, pretty much. My work ethic is so terrible and my social skills have deteriorated exponentially. Wish me luck.
Don't worry, you can always sleaze your way to a HR position and get paid for not hiring men.
Just message him back doofus.
You are thinking too hard about it.
More than likely, they forgot to respond, kept putting it off, and then became afraid to respond after not saying anything for a bit.
Happens to me a lot. I've accidentally ghosted a few friends.
It's not like I don't want to talk to them, i'm just afraid of being pressed on "why didnt you say anything to me for so long" since "I forgot" sounds like a lie…
Don't worry business majors are just a piece of worthless paper in order to say you have a degree. Their purpose is so that the business can say that they hire college graduates. What you should have been doing is socializing and forming connections with other majors to help you further your career.
>>52117>What you should have been doing is socializing and forming connections with other majors to help you further your career.
That's exactly what I'm worried about. I chose to be this sedentary and lazy and now I'm just going to have to type up a resume and apply everywhere with a pulse. Not many people I can use as references either.>>52115
It's pretty easy when every exam is conducted via computer these days, even for classes on campus. Regardless of the program or set up used for an exam, it isn't too difficult figuring how how it works or how you can very exploit it. Not to mention the professors who are just incompetent and don't care.
It doesn't get better. You're probably going to have to settle as a cart pusher at Trader Joe's or working at Applebee's
Damn, this is me next year. Same major, too.
Although I never cheated because I'm a good egg, I remember fuck all about anything as soon as the class ends. I've always been an antisocial weirdo too so making connections was impossible for me even before the Panda. I'd meet people and try joining school clubs, convince myself everyone resents me, then be alone again. I also thought I was being self-sufficient for never asking the profs for help, but now they have no clue who I am so I can't use them as references. smh why did I choose this major?
Maybe you could do some volunteering before you officially get into the workforce (once vaccines roll out)? I'm a ~minority~ so am planning to really push my ass to get involved with my local scene. You're at least a woman so why not get involved in a woman's shelter or something? If you're a lezzie, get involved in pride or something. If you can wiggle yourself into an admin position you can at least stick that on your resume.
I hate to say it, but you'll have to socialize eventually, anon. The business world just isn't made for hermits like us.
I so screwed up taking this major. I should have been more firm and chose something I was passionate about rather than just going with whatever my dad recommended. I'm so passive. Thanks for the advice though, I know I'm not in a dire situation or anything life threateningly bad. I will work it out.
Thanks. The results aren't even back to tell us how bad it is. So everytime I get anxious or sad about it I feel bad for already giving up.
Fuck, guess I just got to survive to next week and wait for the results. It's out of my hands at this point.
play dating sims. get the rush without involving real people.
Are you borderline anon?
Just try make a new crush I guess depends how easy it is for you to fall for someone.
The feelings may come back unless he did something that triggered you to get over him.
just go for it, fuck 'em. tell me more about this, anon, that sounds legitimately extremely fun. who cares if you break a few weak eggs. you'll always break a bunch of 'em even just walking on eggshells. you're not doing anything wrong.
i did a business btec for three years and i cheated for at least two of them, i did fine in an admin position afterwards because ninety percent of that shit didn't apply to the workforce, you'll be fine
i'm friends with this cute alt kinda girl and i dunno if shes kind into me or not, she's probably not but she has a habit of looking at my tits a lot and giving me occasional ambiguous kinda looks but i'm bad at telling this kinda shit
wish i wasnt so obsessed about getting notes on tumblr
At least you have something to do I just refresh the same few slow imagebaords all day.
i used to care about that shit, now i have like 3k followers and the constant notes are a pain
my bf keeps wanting to touch and massage my feet. it's clear he has a foot fetish but we haven't talked about it. i don't mind him giving them attention but its a little…weird? what am i meant to do?
Keep your feet clean, change toe nail polish every week, consider wearing a toe ring, never walk barefoot, clip your toe nails to short but not too short, anklets are cool.
tell him don't be a freak lol
foot massages feel nice, even if not in a sexual way, so what's the problem?
I'd rather have a guy with a foot fetish than an ass fetish or something boring like that for that reason.
I spent a week or two listening to sexual audios with deep male voices, and now if I hear a (disembodied) male voice that’s deep without warning, I automatically get slightly turned on.
This is bad. I don’t think I can use Discord anymore.
I used to be like you. The only thing that helped me break free was literally posting recklessly and thinking of my blog as my personal gallery, nothing else. Just upload shit, no tags. Don't check to see how many notes anything gets. It'll all be zero notes at first, but just keep doing it with confidence. People will get your vibe, or they won't.
I have some posts with zero notes, some with like 30, some with thousands, and at least one with 10k notes (more if I count my old blog(s) from when I was younger). I don't really know what makes certain posts stand out, but I don't care. Not tagging shit has helped me so much mentally.
reading through messages i've sent in this one discord server for a hobby and realizing that i've never…really held a conversation with anyone. it's mostly just me responding to things other people have said, and going ignored. sucks
Do you have an idea why they ignore you? If you don't tag someone, they might not see your message/reply either, anon.
Getting ready to go on vacation alone. Kind of sad but my boss told me I need a vacation and I agree so I'm going…
Hope you have fun and try to live in the moment!!
As someone who used to go on vacations and on trips to anime conventions alone, for the love of god, be easy, breezy, and open. It can be outright depressing alone if you let it get to you, but when I'm social and strike up conversations with strangers, you can really have a fun time. People are responsive to fun individuals. Good luck and have fun.
Have you tried asking people direct questions?
Most people love talking about themselves or what they're doing, and it's easy to segue into other stuff from there too.
i bought fried rice yesterday but dropped the box. didn't spill too much rice (maybe lost a spoonful) but i dropped SO much of the fucking shrimp because most of it was stacked on top of the rice. i'm eating it now and there are only two shrimps left in the bowl ):
i'm probably just boring. other people are generally replied to >>52230
i do, but rarely since i don't wanna be the one that's always asking questions
Intermittently I just get this pit in my stomach thinking about how easily my bf could be cheating on me without me knowing anything. It's because I used to be very blackpilled, and especially because of a previous horrible relationship in which I gradually noticed more and more signs of my ex lying and being shady, mostly through accidentally seeing stuff on his phone screen. I was young and dumb, so I forgave him a bunch of times even when I knew something was off. Over a few years I got used to the feeling I guess, and was just always waiting for the inevitable next doomsday event.
Now I have this compulsion to try and catch a glimpse of something bad whenever my bf checks something on his phone, and feel an overwhelming dread while doing so because I'm just 100% expecting to notice something that will implode everything. I hate feeling this way again. There's nothing about his behaviour that warrants any concern but the despair I sometimes feel is just so much.
Apart from this he brings out the absolute best in me. We are committed to spending our lives together and he consistently demonstrates how much he cares and wants to support me, and by all accounts we are a great match and just have a lot of fun together. I wish I could enjoy it and feel good waking up in the morning next to him, instead of this stress and fear.
i want you to know you have my full sympathy for this
>befriend cute boy
>he's looks a bit like my ex expect with completely different politics and also taller and better looking
>the same kinda middle class white boy vibe
>talks about social justice, tranny shit and about how he's queer
>talks about how hes an aromantic asexual despite having had crushes on people and having had sex
>he mentions that he would like a partner who he has no romantic attachment to and theres no need to have sex
>i tell him about how im bi and also sex repulsed when it comes to men so i generally stick with women
>we eat a bunch of mcdonalds and have a food coma
>we fall asleep in bed and he removes my glasses for me
>its comfy, i feel safe and have a full night of sleep without night terrors
>we didnt cuddle but i probably could have cuddled him if i wanted
Guys do i make this guy my queer platonic partner or whatever the fuck, he's a bit of a soyboy but he has enough quirks to fascinate me tbh, it's like i'm a reporter doing a character study or something
fuck shrimp is the best, i'm so sorry for your loss
If it were me I probably would've just rinsed the shrimp off in the sink and ate them anyway, but I'm a disgusting garbage person.
>>52270>he mentions that he would like a partner who he has no romantic attachment to and theres no need to have sex
Isn't that just a friend?
I don't see why you couldn't be friends with him.
i just quit a job after my first day and everyone is disappointed in me. my anxiety got really bad, i was crying and panicking and i couldnt go again today but i feel like i shouldve been tougher. i feel so much guilt and now im back to being a neet and unsure what to do with my life. im going to finish my associates degree starting in fall but for now what do i do? and what about after that?
i dont know if i should try finding a job that may be a better fit somehow, or try to make money online…i dont want to waste anyones time. either way i want to do something beneficial. i have no clue about what career path i should do. i mostly just want to not exist right now, everyone is mad i quit. my boyfriends mother chewed me out. it hurts so fucking bad why cant i be stronger? i need to punish myself. i just want to figure out my life and be happy but its hard to do what i love while seeing people with figured out careers and lives.
he mentioned he had a gf he was really close to but had no romantic feelings for, he mentioned feeling like he lost her as a friend when she got a bf, i think he just wants like, a best friend you do couple shit with
There is more people like you that get way too anxious on their first day idk why this happens but it's wack try to be more confident. Eventually you are going to have to be able to pull your own weight in a job, you have to endure, no job is fun they are not supposed to be, its work just do what you are trained to do deliver a service.
If you are rich though no worries, not so big of a mess up. Just be more disciplined and stoic next time.
I read it belatedly but thank you anon, it made me really happy that someone was able to connect to my post
I used to have a really close friend, we hung out almost every day, I met him online but he lived in my neighborhood. A few years ago we drifted apart because some shit went down in my life and we had a short argument and when it had blown over my life was such a mess I didn't reach back out.
A few months ago I reached out to him again because I found his phone number in my DMs from years ago and he was open to meeting up and talking about things, but then he stopped responding when I was in town. I kept trying a few times because I wanted to make up for what came off as me ghosting him. Now, after another 2 months of no response, I sent a meme on a whim and he suddenly responded again, saying that he's sorry he didn't meet up with me and that he was doing pretty well up until "a few months ago" when he relapsed. It was pretty vague but now I'm wondering if me reaching out to him after years of radio silence did something and I may have missed something in the past? Or am I being paranoid? I reached out a few months ago and he said he was doing well until a few months ago and is now doing too poorly to meet. What is the truth
why do men hate me
every man i talk to ghosts me within a week
i try my best to seem interesting and interested but they justkldjasflkdjasf
my social life feels hopeless tbh and I'm so lonely
>socially isolated irl
>work from home, no way to meet people
>easy to start a convo but it quickly shows how weird I am or I filter my weirdness and come off as extremely bland
>people either think I'm boring and autistic or that I'm interesting but extremely strange
>had to learn not to overshare when I talk to new people because I heard through the grapevine or to my face that I'm super weird
>share no mutual interests with normies, interactions feel hollow and draining
>socializing online works much better, people share my interests and hobbies, but I'm older than the average dweller and feel down on myself when hanging out with early-mid 20s
>nobody lives close by and I can't translate any friendships into irl even on a long-distance basis where we meet once every couple months
>I'm "someone" in specific internet circles, if I outed myself I'd have to live in fear forever
>so even in the places where I fit in I have to hide my powerlevel so I'm not detected
>sometimes someone talks about the thing I'm associated with or mentions a rumor they heard and I'm consumed by all my efforts to not blow my cover
>tfw belong nowhere
I'm so exhausted from fighting with my boyfriend. It only stops if I do everything he wants all the time.
I wish I stuck to 2D guys because they can't pull this shit. I want to get a dakimakura and call it a day.
kick him out and get the daki of your dreams anon
Do what this >>52304
anon said. If he can't handle not getting his way all the time, don't expect you can fix that or change him. He's an ass.
My brother has cancer and refuses to take chemo, my mom literally losing her mind trying to change his mind and my dad completely shut himself off from the outside world and won’t talk to anyone except me. I don’t want to lose another family member.
I wish it was that simple or easy. I've let it drag out for too long now and it's pathetic but I worry about what will happen to him.
I'm being completely unironic about the daki though.When he's being shitty I just think about how my husbando would never do anything like that
illumi my love.gif
dont worry about him anon hes a grown man
buy that daki and dont look backi
People are strong, even if he seems like he wouldn't be ok he'll find a way to survive by himself. Don't let a man get in the way of your happiness.
This. Also, if he says shit like "I'll kms if you leave" or whatever, that's a manipulation tactic. At the end of the day, it's not your responsibility to make sure he takes care of himself.
I'm not fond of the way men act sometimes.
I’m pretty sure I can only take men as personal cows and/or fwbs these days. I simply don’t respect them as people, even though I pretend I do. Right now, I don’t really think I even want a relationship. I only just realised all this because I thought about this one guy who’s attractive but fucked up (his words) not being particularly into me, and noticed that all my reasons for being upset weren’t even personal.
They all linked back to the fear that it’ll be harder to learn his secrets. He’s still dumb enough that he’ll probably bite, but it would have been so much easier if he had latched onto me. I really just want the milk, and I sort of wish he had a blog or diary I could read instead of talking to him directly.
If all men are garbage, it’s sort of like peeling back a band-aid to find out just how gross they are, especially if they’re hot on the outside. It’s almost the same feeling I get when I read the early life section of serial killers’ Wikipedia articles, or fixate on a piece of media. The ones that are already ugly are just too repulsive on top of everything else, though.
They all get boring and irritating when you figure out their patterns, but initially, it’s fascinating. The only downside is the danger, but I usually ghost before that. I’m paranoid that a lot of therapists and psychs are secretly the same way about their clients, so I avoid them.
I posted this elsewhere but I'm reposting it here to see if there's anyone that can relate
your post has been related to
>>52118> it isn't too difficult figuring how how it works or how you can very exploit it
tell us how it works and how you exploited it. please
NTA but I agree, most setups for these things are extremely basic and can be exploited if you know a little bit about what you're looking for. But it's hard to start from zero and say "just look here" especially without knowing which specifics would apply to you.
god damn it just tell me your secrets. tell me how you did it. maybe i'm not looking for tips maybe i just want to read on what scammers and cheats are up to
tonight my bf sent me this video and told me that he now fully believes that the ISS is fake. we have been together for almost two years, he is the only person I have ever loved, I fell in love with him because of how smart and strong minded he was, I was really obsessed with him, we lost our virginities to each other, he was the perfect older man for me. I have watched the video over and over again and it is so obviously fake, I told him this and he left me, its like all of a sudden he changed from being so smart to being insanely dumb. hell is real and we are living in it
your parents sound like disgusting zogbots>>51246
this video has such a strange aura… the fact that he is shirtless while wearing an ugly checkered hat and big glasses… the strange logs on the wall…
I'm not those anons, but if nothing else, if you're attending school remotely via computer, then regardless of whatever monitoring software they require you to have it can't beat you just having a second computer next to you for Google or notes or whatever.
it's really hard not to resent my parents and their choices in partners when they're obsessed with public/media attention. the truth is this: everyone involved is lying. about finances, about intent, about fidelity. two of them are cheaters, two of them are abusive, all of them are crazy people. my mother is an enabler. anyone who flaunts their relationship to the public has mental viruses.
you are not celebrities. this is not a movie. you are all OLD, FAT BOOMERS. this is GHETTO. WHY IS THIS ON THE NEWS? WHY ARE YOU ALLOWED TO BE PUBLIC FIGURES? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? I AM HUMILIATED TO SHARE YOUR NAME. FOCUS ON YOUR POLITICAL CAREER, HANDLE YOUR BUSINESS AND SHUT THE FUCK UP.
I DON'T GIVE A FUCK IF THE INSTAGRAMMER YOU FAKE-MARRIED IS TALKING SHIT. IS THAT YOUR DEMOGRAPHIC? DO THOSE PEOPLE MATTER? ARE YOU TRYING TO BE A KARDASHIAN? KYS. THOSE AREN'T EVEN YOUR KIDS, BUT I AM AND I AM SICK OF THIS. IMAGINE HOW IT'LL FEEL FOR THEM CARRYING THIS SHAME WHEN THEY'RE NOT EVEN YOUR FUCKING CHILDREN. YOU SHOULD ALL HAVE BEEN FUCKING STERILIZED WHEN YOU HIT A CERTAIN AGE AND HAD YOUR FINGERS CHOPPED OFF SO YOU COULDN'T GO ON SOCIAL MEDIA. WE NEED TO BRING BACK THE FUCKING BELGIAN HAND-CHOPPER KING FOR YOU SAMBOS ALONE. I HATE IT HERE!!!!!
anon i have no idea what you're talking about but your caps lock rant and the guro anime girl was incredibly hypnotic i zoned out for like five minutes after reading it
can your mom follow me on IG
he left you for agreeing with him?
I fcking hate the state of men currently. I have two male friends who are not fcking coomers. Like I had to sift through a bunch of online to find ONE in similar age, who isn't some cumbrain. My other male friends are surprisingly older than all I have met and are very respectful. I fucking hate this generation of males. They are so addicted to porn and their fetishes and kinks. I hope they end up alone and never stringing a girl. So f*cking pathetic.
Anyone else get tired of men just being coomers? I'M SO F*CKING DONE WITH THEIR SHIT.
What cryptos are you buying? I'm bought into bitcoin and monero.
I have no hope of ever being a functioning adult.
i hate bpd, or whatever you want to call it. i just hate my brain, it seems like my emotional intelligence never evolved past childhood. i'm incapable of genuine love and i ruin every chance of having someone who genuinely loves me in my life. i don't think i was meant for this sort of life. i feel sick to my stomach.
I ruined my life by becoming a NEET five years ago and I simply don't have the ability, or resolve, to fix it :D
Not that I ever had any plans for my life before becoming a NEET. Tbh it was just a matter of when.
I was joking but now I do want it>>52377
same for the last 2 sentences>>52381
>Forget scab is there and scratch it
>Accidentally pick scab off
I was feeling really stressed and irritable. My bf asked me to repeat something I said, and I just felt this wave of exhaustion wash over me. I said something stupid like "When I'm stressed I don't like repeating myself," and then I instantly regretted it and apologized like 1000x. Fml.
In an ldr
>bf keeps asking for nudes
>is hellbent on sexting almost every day
why tf does he think about sex so much. I'm sick of pretending like i enjoy sexting
this coomer isn't worthy of you. dump the fucking rubbish
I want to leave my boyfriend but we signed a lease together, and I don't make enough money to live on my own.
I want to leave because I don't know if our relationship will work out in the long run (he wants to settle down, I want to explore and travel).
I've also been realizing how attractive I find women and realizing I could be bisexual. This is opening up my eyes to a lot of things about myself.
I don't know, I just feel so cramped and unable to really branch out with my current life situation. I'm just ready for my life to begin, but until then I'm just in school and depending on someone else to pay for shit.
there's not much good about me, but at least i'm self-aware and self-critical and mind my own damn business when i should. i'm not super self-absorbed or materialistic either – and i do have my mother to thank for raising me this way.
Even though life is hard and dangerous as a woman I love being female. Always remember the y chromosome is dying out, even if its beyond our lifetime. We already have ways to create life without direct male involvement, in the future we'll be able to create life without men at all. In the meantime, non-childfree women need to keep dating and having kids with good, attractive males while these men watch on in anger, kill therselves (in minecraft), or troon out. Even if it's still dangerous in many places, now we can divorce, vote, meet freely in groups, have sex without marriage, get abortions, create all-female spaces, and more without being jailed or killed!
You never know.
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I don't need advice I just want to vent.
I broke up with my bf but I think I still have feelings for him. Maybe I just miss the way he made me feel sometimes. I don't know why I even still think about him. He's a momma's boy and I thought I was okay with it, but as time went on, I realized that that is not my type. What's ironic is the guy I'm talking to now is sort of like him but he's not a femboy with major mommy issues.
In fact I really like this new guy a lot and I hope this relationship goes somewhere, but we'll see. Anyway, my ex and I are still friends and he's still in love with me and believes we'll get back together one day. He wants me to be his mommy gf Cringe., but I don't. I mean, I'll equally take care of a guy if he treats me right, but being a mommy gf is just not for me.
First of all, men have aways been coomers. Secondly, why are you censoring fuck?
Do you ever get freaked out by how you're going to support yourself in the future? I'm a NEET as well and while I'm enjoying it, I know it's going to come to an end in a few years.
ntayrt, but I doubt men were coomers to the same degree before internet porn. All sorts kinks have become mainstream thanks to porn being so easily accessible. Porn-induced ED is becoming more common as well.
>>52466>but I doubt men were coomers to the same degree before internet porn
Literal wars have been started over men's desire to coom.
They might have actually done it less in the past due to it being less accessible, but I don't think their temperament itself has changed all that much.
i have so much love to give. i want to fall in love with someone
So what is stopping you anon?
did something embarrassing a while back in one of my online hobby spaces (a while back being last year, march or so) and while it was nowhere near some of the worst cases i've seen within, i've been really anxious about returning to it…because what if someone remembers….
i got woken up by someone in my apartment having a really loud domestic, like aaaaaaa stfu
i got to have enough sleep but i woke up way too early
i don't know who to fall in love with
i'm so scared of my mom hurting me, i've been hurting her instead and pushing her away and i can tell it makes her sad and i feel awful for treating her like this but i need to protect myself i don't want her to hurt me
someone i didn't want to leave me left me
i want them back. we were finally starting to get along…
I don't want to go to work tomorrow… Why try. No matter what I do I'll never feel like I'm good enough. Go to work, achieve, get the raise, or become homeless and freeze to death in a boxcar, I'll get exactly the same amount of self-satisfaction either way
fucking hell choachan banned me off their fucking synctube let me fucking in you fucking ingrates
just want to post some songs from my favorite kpop group fuck off
i am literally seething right now no one is in my fucking twitch stream! only one devoted viewer.
i want a gf so badly but at the same time dating apps are so tedious reeee
I feel like im losing my main friend group bit by bit - not helped by two of the men in it going full moid over the last few months and causing fractures. It's gradually getting quieter - people are growing older and getting busier.
The only good thing is that the only other woman regulalry in the group seems to be doing better. Her mental health is improving and she's been more creative lately. I worry sometimes that that means she'll get a new - better, and less overwhelmingly male- friend group and leave me alone in this one, and that makes me feel like the asshole.
Another group I've been slowly cultivating over the last few months has turned out to be about 80% really cool people who are fun to hang out with, and then the last one is a fucking angsty gay furry barely out of the fucking embryo and hes always snarky about anything I say or do in the group. I don't know what I did to set him off, but it just constantly feels like he's looking down on me.
Add on top of that, my psych is coming down on me like a ton of shit with a possibly autism diagnosis.
I don't know how to feel about that either. I don't think I'm upset by the idea. I think i'm scared. I think i'm terrified, which is stupid becuase if I AM an autist then surely finding out is a good thing? Knowing means I can find ways to deal with stuff, right?
But im sitting here reading the emails shes sending me and fighting off the gradually rising panic.
I just don't want to be autistic on top of everything else. I can't handle that too.
Since the thread I posted in was deleted, (I assume for promoting mood hate? That or a pedophile reported it.) I'm going to repost it here because I don't have social media. And I was finally able to put to words why I hate pedophiles aside they're gross and horrible people.
I hate pedophiles. I hate how they try to fight for normalcy, I hope they never get it. They are already abundant and all over the internet.
I hate how they deflect arguments with "lol old hag is jealous." No it is not that but the fact that pedophiles are just terrible people.
Anyone who commits acts of pedophilia is truly a selfish person. They don't think of the harm that's being done. They don't think of the child is still a person who will have to grow up with what has happen to them. They don't think of the fact that they caused so much suffering to a innocent soul. They'll deflect it with "they'll just have sex anyway," that not for them to decide. They are causing another person to be brought up in a world of pain and anger. They are selfish because they do not understand or think of their consequences. The world is still so misogynistic that people still defend and accept the perpetrators, give them a slap on the wrist. Other sickos commend them as heros. Saying it's natural. No it's not natural, they are just deluding themselves into a sick fantasy fueled by porn. But I am glad there are so many against them, people are speaking out. People are taking actions against their attackers. They need to be removed from this world. Pedophiles only think of themselves, they do not care for their victims. They don't even see their actions as wrong. They are proud of the harm and pain they cause and they'll even brag about it. That's the problem they don't see their victims as people but pieces of meat that is ment to be used.
That is why I'll never support pedophiles and it sickens me everytime someone gets outted as one. The same argument can be applied to rapist because a lot of them go hand-in-hand.
My height and my thighs are hot and based. You are jelly bitch. You're scared that I'm tall and have thick legs for no other reason than you don't have them. You are probably better looking than me but you're still seething. It is sad honestly.
Anonymous Admin 52655
If you're talking about the pedo thread on /b/, I removed it because it was made when we still allowed new threads to be made to talk about men as a group, before these threads took over /b/ and we consolidated them into the pinkpill and trans generals. It wasn't previously removed because it had been dead for over a year. It suddenly got necro'd and I cleaned it up so that other users on /b/ wouldn't see it as an invitation to make more separate threads about men, as this is still an issue. You're always welcome to discuss these things in the pinpkill thread or vent threads, we just don't allow for new, separate threads to be made just to talk about men. Sorry about that.
You sound hot anon, can you be my giraffe gf? I'm 5'4 with thick thighs too
Thank you for explaining it and I understand now.
I don't understand the "old hag is jealous" argument that pedophiles make, I'm pedobait "barely legal" and mentally ill
and still 100% agree with you. Grown men can abuse girls young enough to be their daughters, sometimes not even old enough to legally consent, and they either get no punishment at all or one that's just an inconvenience at worst. A lot of "nomaps" get pitied and babied online because people believe pedophilia is a mental illness just like any other and if you tell them they're sick fucks who deserve to die then you're ableist.
>>52651>I hate how they try to fight for normalcy, I hope they never get it.
but they already did.
please like me please please please that's all i want please like me i can be whoever you want me to be i just want you to like me
>>52650>she'll get a new - better, and less overwhelmingly male- friend group and leave me alone in this one,
My guess is that you could ask her about her new female friend group and possibly join? Maybe she's tired of the mascoid bullshit too and will get you.
>Knowing means I can find ways to deal with stuff, right?
Pretty much yeah. For me, it helped recognize chimping-out as meltdowns and find their root causes/be able to prevent or minimize the damage, not just blame myself for being a dumb bitch.
Dude just be yourself. If someone can't like you for who you are (unless you're a massive cunt) than they shouldn't be your friend/bf in the first place.
The problem is that this is an online friend group - and I feel like she's eventually gonna work up the social courage and mental health to find real life friend groups.
Which would be amazing - don't get me wrong. She's one of my best friends and I'm so hyped to see her doing better.
But that improvement for her is, I think, going to inevitably take her away and I'll be stuck here.
Which is gonna suck, a lot, for me.
That really would be nice.
The last year or so has really messed me up. I was making good progress towards being healthy, but then covid and lockdown and isolation just ripped it all away again.
>Barista at my usual coffee stand recognizes me
>"Large coffee with one cream right?"
>Go away feeling ashamed that someone knows something about me
>Figure he's thinking "Oh here's that ugly girl with the shitty car and boy clothes again"
Why am I like this
I also hypothesize about internal dialog of any service person I meet lol, like how cashiers are judging me for the items that I buy because it's totally normal to worry about whether or not my groceries and tastes are up to an arbitrary stranger's standards
Im another for that.
inventing internal dialogue for everyone around, and it's always super judgemental.
>>52682>like how cashiers are judging me for the items that I buy
When I was a cashier I don't think anything really stuck out to me aside from obese people buying cartloads of junk food.
Generally I tried as much as I could to pretend I wasn't there, and I'd usually forget what I'd just scanned/bagged within like 30 seconds of them walking away from the register.
>>52679>to find real life friend groups
Well, if they could make a discord or similar stuff to chat online you could ask to join i I guess? I have no clue how this works honestly, sorry.
>I was making good progress towards being healthy, but then covid and lockdown and isolation just ripped it all away again.
Relatable. It's hard for me to stop being a shut-in freak when you're basically forced to be one. Wishing you luck though, the restrictions are going down in most places so you could possibly meet irl friends too?>>52682
Used to struggle with that but then I realized they don't care about your purchases as much as how you and their boss treats them.
When a cashier is rude to me I avoid going to that shop for a week or more instead of arguing back/reporting though.
I hate when they do this. I don’t know why people think it’s friendly to have a stranger remember you, to me it is just creepy. I also don’t want someone judging what I order and tracking it in their mind. The worst is that sometimes they comment on what you buy.
I once had a guy serve me and then somehow later find me on social media and add me, urgh.
I'm a retail slave in a
[spoiler]formerly[\spoiler] tourist heavy area.
I see hundreds of people daily.
I don't have any interest in what people are buying or what they look like unless they give me a reason to. (You'd have to be doing something that id need to report, or be behaving strangely enough for me to have to recall your face in case you come in again. Buying "strange" combinations of items isn't worth remembering)
No one but creeps and boomers care about what you're getting.
I legit could not tell you what the last person I rung up at the register bought. It's just that unimportant.
See that's what I rationally assumed to be the case, but I just can't shake the paranoia. I'm ashamed to buy any food that could be considered "childish", like sausages or candy. Even toilet paper, which is ridiculous because every single person uses it. >>52693
I've worked in customer support too so I know
, even if someone gives me a weird vibe I only interact with them for a few minutes tops and immediately forget whatever they did that annoyed me, and if you ever showed me a photo of them I wouldn't know I've met them. It's just brainworms
i miss my mother and puppy. i dont think i even want to live or be with my boyfriend but i cant afford to move back home and afford to bring all of my items and if i did so i wouldnt have the freedom i have now. so i try to suck it up and see the good in things. i care for him, i love him, but i dont know if im in love with him. he doesnt always treat me nicely and hes childish, messy and has no direction. but he offers to pay for rent and stuff while i go back to college (even then he doesnt always show up to work and i have to try to scrape up money so he can afford uber money) im working toward my license, toward a career (i have no job right now so maybe i have no room to speak) and he doesnt want to do anything. i clean everything because i dont work which is fine, but its so frustrating when he cant even pick up small things after himself. ill take care of the house but im not a fucking maid 24/7…but we’re all flawed, so maybe this is just how relationships are (its my first actual one)
but i just try to suck it up and see the good in things. i have two kittens i love, freedom, a new state to explore…the ability to focus on college without working (the money stress is still here though so i may eventually find a job) i dont know sometimes its nice, but sometimes i feel like a prisoner and his family offers to help me with things like practicing more for my license then gets mad that neither of us have it but wont go through with helping us so its upsetting…whatever. this is the real world i guess. at least ill get to visit my mom every couple of months for doctor appointments and practice driving then.
I think I've had an awakening. I'm no longer suicidal. Life is just an experiment. I'm occupying this suit for a limited time. I think I will cause some chaos on purpose for fun.
I'm in this situation too. I want to apply for summer jobs related to my studies but I keep getting blocked by having no references because I didn't do anything my entire time at university and basically lived like a NEET. I have literally no job experience so I'm applying at fast food and retail now to get at least something. I hate myself for fucking it up this bad. I know this is an older post but I really need to vent about this too.
>>52690>you could possibly meet irl friends too
I'm gonna get to see my partner for the first time in six months at Easter so that's gonna be nice.
She moved for a new job which took her to a different city, whcih was fine becuase trains are cheap and I could get there easily every week.
The train journey was kinda unsettling because 'people', but it could've been worse, you know?
But then covid comes along, trains are closed, you get fined if you move too far from where you live.
So it's been a long time coming. Im terrified, honestly.
And yeah, that's exactly it. Everything I was trying to learn not to be was forced back on me.
I was really starting to make some actual progress, you know? I wasn't so terrified of the train, of random strangers. I was doing better buying stuff on my own, I was less petrified of phone calls.
Then this last year just feels like it's backslipped me so far.
I turned 22 and I still haven't even kissed a guy. I realized it's almost guaranteed I won't be in relationship, just a couple of years ago I was 100% convinced I'll get a bf, but now it's such a foreign thought, it's so crazy to think people actually experience romance.
Posting the remains of livestock in piranha infested waters would be easier on the eyes.
I finished watching Truth Seekers.
I mean hey, even if Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are nothing new it's not everyday you get to see them act alongside friggin' Malcolm McDowell.
Plus the cinematography and story were fairly ace, though I can see why something like this wouldn't make it past A season in the UK
Meh, it was less boring than Spaced, 7/10.
It’s ok. The time for all that stuff should come naturally and you shouldn’t feel pressured into it or force yourself. Some people meet in their 40s so it isn’t the end of the world if you don’t do anything by the time you’re 30. Idk why people make such a big deal out of their sexual experience. It’s fine being a kv in your 20s and it’s especially so hard to meet people during a pandemic- there’s probably a lot of other people in a similar situation like yourself rn. Like how people who were looking forward to dating in university but then got that opportunity ripped away from them due to online school. I’m sure you’ll get into a relationship eventually! Maybe even soon if the timings right
I was a khv until age 23, anon. Dw too much about your age. And honestly, it's not even that hard to get a bf if you just want the experience of having one. Just find someone decent and get to know and spend time with them. It might not work out in the end, but that's fine.
Since even the most socially-adapted normie was forced to stay home for an extended period of time, I assume that they are starting to get used to being alone so I think they also would be uncomfortable being with a lot of strangers all of a sudden. A matter of habit, pretty much.
Also, what helped you get through when you took a train for the first time? Was it thinking about finally meeting your partner, listening to music, or such? Maybe it could also help you this time.
Where I live, there wasn't a lockdown so we can go outside but in masks and stuff (and i hope we get to wear a mask after covid ends bc face bad).
I'm still going outside from time to time but for fitness reasons so I don't really get to talk to people. But it's better than not going outside at all I think.
nta but im genuinely curious
stay away from those guys too
nta but it's fine to tell someone you feel close to otherwise it isn't a big deal. if you feel the need to tell someone to give you some peace of mind, you can do it. if they get weirded out by it or think of you differently, then they're not worth the trouble to date.
>>52741>Some people meet in their 40s so it isn’t the end of the world if you don’t do anything by the time you’re 30.
What if you want to have children?
It might be good to let him know you're a virgin. He'll know you probably don't have STDs that way, and know to be more careful with penetration.
But there are dudes who fetishize or infantilize virgins so be sure he's not one of those types first.
I don't think it really makes any difference if you haven't kissed or held hands before, so no need to mention that if you don't want to.
I'm confused about my sexuality and have been for a long time and don't really know where to vent it.
Basically ever since puberty and even before I was always only attracted to women, and my childhood experiences match up pretty well with what I've seen lesbians describe. I legitimately thought other girls were just pretending to like men to seem mature until I was in high school, and it was a shock to me when I realized my best friend was attracted to her boyfriend. I admitted to myself I liked women at 13, and within a year I accepted that I was lesbian after trying very hard to prove to myself that I had any attraction to men at all and coming up with nothing. If you're attracted to a sex it shouldn't be that confusing to figure it out right? It never was for me with women, once I realized it there was instant acceptance.
Fast-forward several years of considering myself lesbian and living as one, and I met my now-bf. We started as online friends so I kind of fell for him without having to deal with the physical reality that he was male, but once I did fall for him and we got together irl I found that I was able to enjoy being with him sexually. Clearly I'm not 100% lesbian, so cue a second round of intense questioning. The thing is I still feel the same about men who aren't my boyfriend as I always did. I've had a lot of obsessive thoughts and sometimes I compulsively check out every man I see and try to imagine if I could have sex with him, or search up pics of men who are supposed to be "attractive." When I do this after awhile I start to get physically aroused (like just in my gentials, not to be gross) from thinking so hard about sex and sexualizing male bodies so much, but in my mind I feel uncomfortable and disgusted and not at all appealed to or turned on. But I can only get into imagining sex with men if it's my boyfriend or a faceless disembodied shadow-man (even this one is kind of boring), if I force myself to imagine any other specific guy I feel really uncomfortable and like I'm mentally raping myself.
I feel like since I enjoy my boyfriend and can somewhat sexually enjoy the concept of "male" now it means I must be more attracted to men than this and I'm just repressed or something, but I don't know how to "let go" when it comes to this because it feels really gross and wrong. I don't have any sexual abuse history or anything, but I've never experienced "arousal" for a man other than my boyfriend that didn't feel really forced and gross and wrong. I don't know if it's just me and weird hangups or if I sexuality is just fucked up for some reason. It probably doesn't really matter but I keep going back to this and looking for an "answer" to how attracted to men I really am and I can't find it.
Sorry for this giant dump.
I considered myself lesbian throughout high school and dated another girl and was vaguely into girls. I had a similar feeling as you towards men, where I would look at the sort of men other women found attractive and just had a strong "NO" reaction to them, and I don't find myself lusting after random attractive men or enjoying sexual fantasies unless I'm imagining my boyfriend. The only time I ever see random men on the street and have a sexual reaction is if it's someone with a body type or face similar to my boyfriend's.
I don't think you should feel like you have to want to fuck any random attractive man to be attracted to men. I am disgusted at the thought of having sex with most men (not because they're men, but because the concept of sex with random men is repulsive), but with my boyfriend I have an extremely strong reaction where I very much want to have sex with him. As long as you are into the idea of sex with your boyfriend, I don't think you should concern yourself too much with the idea of sex with men in general.
Though for me I don't think I was ever truly a lesbian. While I did have feelings for the girl I dated, and the idea of sex with her wasn't repugnant (we never actually got to the point of having sex), and I can recognize the type of woman I would be into if I had continued thinking I was lesbian, I'm not preoccupied with my sexuality at all. I am not at all sexually attracted to women the way I am to men. My attraction to women was largely a comfort thing, I believe; it's easier and simpler and a lot less scary, which was nice for me since I struggled socially a lot and the lesbians at my school were very kind. But I want to be a wife to a husband and have his children and be able to rely on his manly strength or however one might phrase it, so "sexuality" isn't really a question for me, even if I can see a woman and think, "she's cute, I'd have dated her." I will say, though, that the extreme difference in my sexual reactions to male and female body parts made the answer pretty clear in the end, since there's no question that I like men, and whether or to what extent I like women is irrelevant, considering my goals.
I don't know if my anecdote is helpful to you at all, but I could sort of relate, so I thought I'd share. I think as long as you love your boyfriend, or any other people you might date in the future, sexuality as a concept and element of your identity is better treated as secondary. You could start splitting hairs and get into the dual attraction model or whatever other nonsense, but that sort of thinking is destructive in my experience, and just a way for people to rationalize their confusion.
What matters is the quality of our love, not whether we defined it rigorously enough.
I think "homoflexible" may be the term that fits for you? But honestly, if I were you, I wouldn't worry too much about it. It's fine if you're into women for the most part, but just happened to like one guy for whatever reason.
Thanks for responding anon, I could relate to a lot of your experience. I feel pretty much the same about men as you describe with not lusting after random men etc and only really having reactions to men who remind me of him. Sometimes I can't tell whether it's that I'm not into men in general or just disgusted by the idea of casual sex with them, or maybe kind of both. I was also pretty awkward in school and on some level I might have felt intimidated or uncomfortable with the prospect of a male/female relationships back then too. There weren't so many lesbians at my school either, so identifying as lesbian allowed me to feel more safe from anything that was intimidating.
In my case I'm pretty sure I am actually attracted to women though. Attraction came on pretty intensely when puberty started and was pretty hard to deny. I never got as far as sex with another girl either so I can't say for sure , but I had pretty intense crushes on other girls and kissing and touching them felt electrifying. I feel more detached from my "lesbian side" since I've been with my bf, but occasionally I feel a visceral reaction to an attractive woman I see and remember that it's still there, just kind of ignored or relegated to fantasies these days. The sexual energy you feel with a woman vs a man is totally different to me and I can't say I like one better than the other, they're just really different. Sometimes I think that being attracted to women feels more "innate" to me and hetero is something I learned to get into later on but I'm not really sure. I'm not really bothered by any of this though since my relationship makes me happy
You're definitely right that it's not healthy to obsess like this, but every so often my anxiety over the sexual confusion drives me back to the same thoughts. I've kind of accepted sexuality is complex and I'll never really resolve this or be able to perfectly rationalize it though. I agree with you fully and thank you for your kind words, it feels better to hear someone can relate somewhat.>>52779
Thanks anon, you're totally right.
Yeah, I always have music piping in my ears, I sit in the corner of the train if I can and I look at nobody. Just staring out the window and trying desperately to think about anything else.
I'm super super excited to see her, but at the same time I'm utterly terrified.
It's so stupid man.
ANd yeah, it's kinda sad that lots of normal people are now dealing with social issues and depression, so suddenly people are starting to take it seriously.
Where the fuck was this attempted understanding years ago man.
That and when they all get over it quickly enough since it's just a case of habit, they're gonna go right back to looking down on people who cant just 'get over it'.
And that kills me.>>52777
Seconding that other anon - that sounds like homoflexible.
Pretty much sounds like you developed feelings long before the reality was an issue, and then the reality wasnt an issue.
Which honestly is really quite sweet and I'm low key happy for you.
You don't have to be attracted to all men just becuase you like this one, though - at the very most youre like a 5.999999999999 on the scale bisexual, and this just happens to be your one exception.
Sometimes I’ll be having a shitty day and a customer service worker will mess up something. I’m never overtly rude, but it will piss me off. Sometimes I understand the “Karen” stereotype. I mean I’d never start yelling and berating a customer service worker, but sometimes it’s the straw that breaks the camel’s back and I get wanting to take it out on a stranger. I feel like every single day, I’m irritated about something. Ugh.
I want the pain to do a heckin stopperino
>>52782>but at the same time I'm utterly terrified
Why? Do you fear her being not the same person anymore?
And tbh I usually do the same thing when on public transit - music just takes away everything really, especially if you blast it at max volume. Pretty reckless of me, I know.
>they're gonna go right back to looking down on people who cant just 'get over it'
I genuinely hope that won't be the case, at least not for the most people since everyone would have the more or less same experience now. The asshole normies will stay assholes, but there's hope for the common ones I think.
Took down some stuff on my walls since I'm gonna move out this summer and the walls feel so empty now. Doesn't really feel like my room anymore.
I used to be really good at gardening and keeping plants alive but this past year everything I've planted or bought has just died. I've killed 8 plants completely and the rest of them have had no new growth or are half dead. I didn't change the way I care for them or anything. It feels like I'm cursed or my energy is just horrible enough to kill plants now. Feels bad man.
im talking to this one guy who seems like pretty much everything ive ever wanted in a guy (so far) and i can see hes kinda interested too
id like to be in a relationship with him but my self esteem is literally so fucking low and i think thatd prevent me from having a healthy one
hes never seen a pic of me, ive never seen how he looks like either. weve just been chatting about whatever, personal life stuff and the like, and when he doesnt message me i feel so lonely and im usually annoyed from peoples texts.
i dont really know how to talk to him without sounding too obsessive, but i really want to get closer to him and learn more about him. couldnt even stalk him if i wanted to because hes a mostly no social media kinda guy, and aside from discord/telegram i dont have any of his contacts.
he lives relatively close too and id like to meet him but im like a 2/10 at best though i wouldnt care about his appearance as long as he has good hygiene (seems like he does)
hes also the first guy ive ever told about how much of a sperg i actually am under all my masking, because telling to a stranger seemed a good way to vent without getting in trouble, but now that weve talked more and seeing that he accepts/doesnt mind my autism i really am growing more attached to him. im pretty sure i have bpd too, and im usually the toxic one in relationships (usually long distance so still a virgin) so while i want to date him, on the other hand, i dont want him to go through my mental instability…
i wish it was all easier. i wish i was at least good looking so that guys wouldnt drop me as soon as they find out im mentally broken too
It seems like you’re being pretty up front already. Keep it up, let him know you’re a little crazy, and try to keep being open, even when you feel your worst.
I’m sure you’re not -that- uggo. The type of male that’s terminally online would probably be happy with anyone cool, so long as they’re under 40.
Go for it. Find a convenient excuse to send a selfie, gauge his reaction, meet up with him and go on a coffee date.
Maybe just bad luck that you are planting things in a place that has too much or too little light? Maybe weather different this year?
I don't want to work tomorrow
I just want to spend the rest of my life at home
tell them someone you were in contact with has corona
i need mangadex back aaaaaaaa
Good idea, let’s all get people to run away from the few responsibilities that they have
I agree with the other response here, seems like there’s a pretty good chance a guy on the internet would probably be into you.
A lot of girls surfing the net without a single goal in mind who end up catching feelings for a guy tend to attract guys who do the same thing. If you feel insecure about yourself for whatever reason, just remember that he likely feels the same way about himself. The same groups of people tend to be on one medium and the internet is definitely the place for people who aren’t the most secure about themselves. I think it’ll be fine. Especially if he lives somewhat close to you, what’s the harm in trying to setup a coffee date?
Is it still not back up yet? What's taking them so damn long??
I am too prone to retail therapy. Addicted to buying CDs online. Got a package with five CDs today and it made me happy for the first time in a week
You don't understand, I'm worthless and screw everything up. It's actually my responsibility to find a way to stay away from everyone and not be put in a position where people count on me for things.
same situation as this only he tried to initiate physical contact and now i feel sick and uncomfortable whenever i think about it. i've been avoiding being alone with him. i feel bad, he really is very sweet, but i cant look at him in the eye it makes me freak out. no i dont have any past sexual trauma i'm just insane.
Well I tried holding my tongue on this one, but,
To anyone who was offended by me killing off Marcus Jones via suicide in my silly little fan fiction that’s almost a decade old now:
They WILL make that Milli Vanilli biopic, even if I don’t live to see it. ;P
are you able to get them cheap at least? what do you listen to?
I guess I have to go back to pretending to be a boy in videogames so people would fuck off.
I keep wanting to find nice teammates to play and develop friendship with, just to always meet mentally ill smurfs that would automatically proclaim you as their gf and treat you like their property.
No, I do not owe you talking on voice chat every second. No, I do not owe you making kissy noises or telling you I love you because I got a damn partner. I do not owe you to answer to your message the second you DMd me as well, so please stop spamming everywhere like an idiot because I am a damn human being.
God, I am so happy that I discovered a long franchise with a fascinating story in which I can waste thousands of hours in instead of playing competitive videogames. But Jesus, this treatment from men fucking sucks.
Every day of my damn life. But I dont seek relationshit.
I hate them. I dont really know how to change that, I dont want to waste half my life searching through…. that…
thank you all, your replies made me smile :)
but yea, we didnt talk that much these past few days and he told me he hung out with a girl friend of his and idk, i feel like this was his way of saying hes not really that interested romantically in me or he wouldnt have specified that friend being a girl otherwise… but you know what, its whatever!
i didnt have that many expectations in the beginning anyways, im just glad i get to realize these things sooner. im still going to talk to him to see how it goes but yea, my "obsession" for him died out a bit, and thats actually good ! thank you again c:
So like quite a few people on this site, I'm in my 20s and have never had a boyfriend or an intimate relationship with a guy. It doesn't really bother me because I don't mind being alone and have my own life, but I think in theory it would be nice to feel attracted to someone and share the sort of intimate emotional connection that comes with a relationship. My issue is that when I see the relationships that my friends are in it really makes my skin crawl trying to imagine myself in the same position as them. Like, specifically how I see their boyfriends always cooking for them on Instagram or in the background when we videocall, checking in on them, using petnames, constant pda and touching, watching all the same shows and movies together, how they can't be apart for more than a few hours, etc. I'm happy that my friends have boyfriends who genuinely enjoy taking care of them (and no shame to anyone who wants to be in a relationship like that!), but imagining myself in their position makes me feel so disgusted. Is there something wrong with me for feeling this way? I don't want someone cooking for me, always touching me and participating in everything I do. I think it would feel so demeaning and smothering to be in that position- like they don't even see as my own person anymore just a girlfriend.
I was venting about this to a close friend of mine and she said that it sounds like I'd probably be happier living my life as I am now and that I'm probably not the type of person who fits being in a relationship. Maybe she's right, but somehow when she puts it that way it sounds so depressing and bleak like there's something fundamentally wrong with me. Ergh, but I can't help wondering if she's right and I only enjoy my hypothetical fantasy bfs but couldn't actually have a real relationship.
A lot of guys don't like to cook, traditionally women would do the cooking, so that shouldn't be an issue.
As for the pda and doing stuff together: different guys are affectionate to different degrees. Not all couples engage in pda either, if you prefer to only do certain things in private, just make the clear to whomever you date.
Also, the degree to which you want to spend time with the other person may fluctuate once you actually enter a relationship. A lot of things might seem strange to you just cuz you haven't been in love with a real person like your friends have. I wouldn't put your desires in a box, since they can easily change. If you do enter a relationship and then find it's not for you, that's fine too though.
I finally have sort of gotten off of imageboards and am trying to improve my life. It's good. I miss this, though. It's my social outlet and I miss feeling like I have friends.
Not all relationships are like that at all. Are your friends in new-ish relationships? Because new relationship chemicals make people get all over each other and like it like the other anon said, it's not necessarily dehumanizing. I also don't like to be smothered, but you might also have some issues with the idea of being loved due to self-esteem issues or trauma you might have (kinda speaking for myself here).
Thought I finally repressed memories of my old friends a while back. One memory randomly popped into my mind and now my heart aches for them both even though we were all kind of toxic to each other.
>we all skip school together
>we go to one of friend's house
>we walk to a park nearby
>it's a cold and snowy day
>doesn't stop us
>we get on playground
>we take turns spinning each other on this solo spinny toy
>it's finally my turn
>spinning so fast I'm screaming and laughing
>I get so dizzy I fall off
>I'm giggling and laying on my back with my eyes squeezed shut
>still feel dizzy
>see my two friends looking down at me and laughing too
>they help me up
>we walk down to a convivence store
>we get our favorite candy
>head back to friend's house
>all is good that day
man i hate my ex (online bf) so much and to think of the time I wasted over him which I could have utilised in prepping for my exams makes me crazy. AHH why do we regret things so late, why didn't I know him better before committing. I hate myself more than I hate him because I still cant fucking stop thinking about him and still have hopes that maybe, just maybe he might message me again asking me to get back together.
i wanna dieeee
online relationships aren’t real nonny
>Why? Do you fear her being not the same person anymore?
Oh no, not at all.
It's more a generalised fear that this time we see each other, she'll realise that I'm actually ugly and awful and so on.
Whole laundry list of issues here man.
She could do so
much better than me it isn't even funny.
Yeah I know what you mean on the music though.
It's usually fine since Im usually travelling middle of the day, busy trains.
But even when it's midnight and there's no one around music is still my cope method.
Every time I feel pretty dumb for it but without it I cant deal with the journey.
guys im gonna do ket tonight, i've only ever done weed before, any tips?
Have a safe tripping environment.
Start with a good mood.
Have a trip sitter handy.
i'm doing it with a friend i trust, we're gonna relax and have a nice night together hopefully! thanks for the advice anon
Will the friend also high or will be sober?
Hope nobody sees me picking my teeth with this post-it note lol
Thanks for the words of advice! It makes sense that not everyone is the same and I could probably find someone who isn't like what my friends have if I actually tried. I think most of my friends have been dating their bfs for about 1-2 years. I don't know if that counts as a new-ish relationship or not.
AI do wonder if maybe I have some sort of underlying issues. Everything you both said is very reasonable to me and my friends have also told me that people tend to change once they're actually in a relationship and what they want changes too. For some reason, I just have a very strong aversion to ending up like that. I think it might be a dependence issue, but I also could be overthinking it. Anyway, I appreciate you nonnies for hearing me out.
>>53022>this time we see each other, she'll realise that I'm actually ugly and awful and so on
If that was the case, wouldn't she realize it way sooner? People usually can tell pretty from ugly at first glance I suppose.>She could do so much better than me
But it's pretty much her own choice to stay with you and it's not really hurting anyone, so it's good.
About the music: I do the same, can't stand going outside without my headphones at all.
In public places I don't take them off. Hearing other people's voices, the muzak if I'm in a shopping mall, etc - it's all just too much for me, I panic and can't concentrate on anything. That's why going to public places with someone else is hell - I can't concentrate on whatever that person is saying.
Sensory overload, pretty much, that's why blocking out one sense by blasting some filthy noise through my headphones at max volume helps tremendously.
I don't think you're or anyone is dumb for doing that.
Personally, I do take them off sometimes, but only if I'm in a forest or near a river or like that.
On public transit it's just so much better to listen to music instead of not listening to it no matter how many people are around.
we were both high and it turned out being pretty fun, we both only did one line each tho
Not only have I been drawing variations of Edzilla at least once a decade, but they’ve all been combos of other monsters:
In 2008 it was basically a combination of Edzilla and Cloverfield.
In 2013 a combination of Eddzilla, Eddy’s brother and Envy’s true form from fma (but with Jawbreakers instead of people and at least a hundred times bigger).
This year was Shin Edzilla.
I love having small breasts so much and I feel weird about it. They're big enough to exist at all and small enough to never inconvenience me in any way, I hope they never get bigger, I'm actually worried about it because I've read about it happening to women even late into their 20s and 30s. I don't get why anyone would want to have big breasts other than beauty standards that have been impressed in them to make them feel bad about themselves.
I think jumping in front of a train is the best method for me. It is quick and instantaneous and I won't poop myself because I'll be splattered everywhere.
Think of the conductor, anon.
Yea I know people who have been on a train when someone's thrown themselves on the tracks and it's a really traumatizing experience.
Does this apply to freight trains as well?
I don't think I'm eating enough for my body to heal properly and it's making me freak out over burns and cuts from working in a kitchen because what if they all turn into scars all up and down my arms?
lucky.. i have big boobs and they're genuinely the worst, clothes hang better and look so much more elegant on small breast women and big boobs are so inconvenient
>playing a nice game, enjoying my free time
>all of a sudden have very gay feelings/mental images of myself with my estranged friend who i left on bad terms with and have no intention of reconciling with and to this day want nothing to do with
how the hell am i supposed to be treated like an adult instead of a smol bean? I'm barely under 5 feet! Is it the way I present myself? Is it because I'm shy? Or am I just surrounded by a bunch of immature adults?
I'm so tired of being a lardass but I'm afraid I'm now too old to really help myself. I can feel my metabolism slowing down. I'm worried I might actually be an early stage diabetic and I don't have the cash to see a doctor. I wonder if I should just let myself die young.
I can relate. Confidence helps a lot.
So does dressing in a slightly more "mature" and "classic" way. You don't wanna go too classic/conservative though, or you risk looking like a 13 year old who was dressed by their boomer grandma.
Keep your look a little bit dark and edgy, but not teenage edgelord level, with some classic elements such as blazers, and black dress pants. Stick to high quality or vintage items, limit fast-fashion items.
Also, put on a bit of muscle and wear tall shoes.
I find wearing things like turtle necks or business casual clothes and avoiding florals helps.
Unless you want to spend the rest of your young life living uncomfortably (and maybe even in pain), I would suggest changing your lifestyle. It's never too late to start.
I wish my boss would just get to the point at work. Here is how our conversations should go.
>He tells me what to do
>I ask how to do it (optional)
>He tells me how to do it (optional)
Instead every conversation is a half hour ordeal of me listening to him ramble and trying to sift through his word vomit to figure out what the fuck he wants.
hmm msdfnjg this girl i met online has a really cute personality but she's….so ugly.,,,i feel awful for being this shallow but uahhh i don't know what to do
I just hope she answers so I can apologize, even if we aren't as good as friends as we were before.
Maybe she's cuter in person, if you end up liking someone it won't matter if they're ugly
It's not worth it to go outside
I hate health issues. I get this nausea every afternoon regardless if I eat or not. I used to think it was related to eating certain foods, but now I don't think so because even when I eliminate them (main culprit suspect is meat), I still feel sick.
I feel debilitated over such a dumb issue. L
>>54221>Maybe she's cuter in person
i really doubt that…but we'll see
Have you seen a doctor? There might be a more serious problem you need to get taken care of.
Keep a food diary anon and avoid all the common allergens and then slowly introduce each one
There's this girl I really want to be friends with, but it's clear she has no interest in me. I'm not dumb enough to force a connection but damn. Hurts watching her talk so happily to everyone else.
Just talk to her retard, she has no interest because she probably barely knows who you are.
Actually, motherfucker, I've tried speaking to her. But she exits the conversation when I enter and she shows virtually no interest in the shit I get up to; and I know how to recognize a lack of interest.
I think my suicide watch buddy killed himself…Feel so crushed
As someone who suffered from severe cystic acne as a teen (the only reason I don’t now is bc of meds), it upsets me that there is absolutely no representation in any media of people with acne. Every time I would watch or see a piece of media, I would just feel depressed, insecure, and isolated. The only “representation” would be “nerd” or “ugly” characters who had acne and that was literally it. It would’ve helped so much as a young teenage girl if I had seen ANYONE like me. I felt so alone.
>>54260>tfw suicide partner kills themself first
if only you knew h…
I feel like I'm not as big a weeb as I was in my adolescence. I kinda miss being excited about marathoning my favorite anime and being on the look out for seasonal releases.
I have a very hard time having more than surface level interaction with other people. It's like I just don't belong here.
I miss that too, it was a lot of fun. I kind of want to delete all the anime I have already seen from my mind and experience it fresh. Because I am just not that interested anymore. I literally haven't finished an anime in like five+ years. It changed and I changed too.
what’s the point in living if i’m going to look like this. it feels like a sick joke
Sometimes I feel that way too but only when I'm depressed.
when im alone i want to be with friends but when im with friends i want to be alone lmao
I hate my sister, shes a two faced whore. I hate living in this house. I plan to leave and never move back in again. This time I will be sustained by myself and if I fall I stay where I'm at. I will not ask my family for help after I leave. I will not tell them where I live.
just recalled an old "friend" from high-school. he was an underclassman (maybe by a year?) and we'd always talk together while waiting for the buses (neither of us could drive). i was super awkward and he was going through his "tryhard fuckboy" stage but we got along pretty okay despite that.
i was also the class loser.
anyway i forgot to say "bye" to dude on my last day of school. don't remember his name but i'm sad about this for whatever reason. i think i remember meeting his eyes from the bus but he looked away super fast.
idk he was never as evil to me as some of the other dudes were, so i appreciated his presence even if he was irritating at times.
Is it bad that sometimes I want to kill myself just out of spite? I feel like no one would care unless I was dead.
It’s not worth it Anon
i scarfed down ativan and drank a ton of vodka and all if made me do was sleep for 3 days straight. why do i fail at suicide? and the one person i wish could hug me and tell me im not a failure tells me to go away because hes tired, is this love? i just want to be gone. nobody will ever want me around. im going to try again tonight with more ativan and alcohol. i just want to be good enough.
please don't do this anymore anon, perhaps try and contact some self help services
When or how will I ever get over the need to be the hottest woman in the room? Being simultaneously attracted to women all the while wanting to outdo them makes me want to chug gasoline.
I wish I could be happy in a relationship. Guys are beautiful to me both in their appearance and emotional complexity but my interest just evaporates the second I'm held by one in an explicitly romantic context. I don't want to be someone's girlfriend. I want a cute big brother type friend I can cuddle and lean into for emotional support but I don't like kissing people and I hate sex. I did have a male friend like that once, I was living in a homeless hostel a couple streets down and he would let me chill in his apartment and he would sit up all night with me and talk about stuff and play games and god he had the prettiest smile and I wanted to cuddle him so bad but not like, outright date him. I don't know him any more but I miss him. He caught me in the street maybe a year ago and it was awful because I had a bunch of self-inflicted injuries healing on my face and I felt fucking ashamed. He asked me what was up and I just laughed and said "oh the usual!" and he tilted his head in confusion at me and just I noped the fuck out of there.
I feel this, I'll be genuinely upset if mine grow any larger, I actually really like mine and think they're the perfect size for my body type, any more and they'd just look disgustingly disproportionate with the rest of me
I had a picture of me posted online for a university thing, and I can't help but fear that the moids in my class are going to do something to it. I know this is really just paranoia, I'm ugly but not deformed so I don't think my picture is anything special, but I'm really afraid of men and I went so long without any men outside of family seeing my face and no pictures online, and suddenly that safety bubble gets popped. I hope it really is just unfounded fears. I know I sound schizo, but I'm just really really afraid of men. At least it's not that public, only the 10 people taking that specific class will see it and just 4 of these people are men, but I can't help but be terrified.
Any other queens neglecting their hygeine because of stress? ~>>54324
Can you contact the university and ask them to take it down?
Reverse image search it from time to time to see if it is reposted anywhere. You can also tell whoever is running the class that you have a stalker or something and don’t feel comfortable having your photo and name online together.
also if you do reverse image search do it via yandex not google
i had a weird sex dream about the YMS guy, it was really weird all we did was kiss a little and then he coomed himself and he got out his phone and started playing genshin impact, we were also both knights but like knights with magical powers in a hogwarts sort of setting, Adam (YMS) also had the same parents and brother as my ex boyfriend and i hate them so much, my ex's brother came in wearing my hello kitty shirt and harajuku cosplay and was searching for his camera and then had a go at me for not finding it for him and Adam defended me and i told Adam i wanted my hello kitty shirt and harajuku cosplay back and Adam went to go fight my exes brother for me and then i woke up and i feel really bad for having a sex dream about YMS because he's gay and a furry and i know he wouldn't consent to it even if i was wearing a fursuit
Obviously I don't know your circumstances but as for getting rejected I would say the value of life isn't derived from your relationships with others.
Generally speaking people who contemplate suicide as a "real" option are highly self-aware and as such are more than capable of leading a life worth living. I am sure no one sensible would consider you anything like vermin.
Introspect, dedicate yourself to something, and recognize that your life is worth preserving if only by virtue of being a contemplative individual who does no harm.
I feel like everything is pointless and its really fucking with me. When I read or study things I find interesting, my brain kicks in with "what's the point of you doing this you won't apply it, it doesn't matter" and kills my motivation.
I believe I totally lost my wallet. I'm so frustrated and angry. I have my passport, my state ID, my bank cards, checks. In there. This fucking sucks. Now I have to report my passport missing, take another state ID (fuck dmv wait lines) and hopefully get my permit re-printed…And i fucking feel my sister and her friend took my fucking wallet. But I can't lay a fucking finger on that ugly premature cunt. Since she is trusted by my family. I hope she dies and rots before the age of 30 and her friend too.
You have to be in my shoes to have this much anger. Walk a mile in my place before you open your mouth.
wtf your sister took it? maybe you could secretly search her house/room?
because shes a passive aggressive pos long story short me and her don't have a good relationship
oh no way i can search her room, shes there 99% of the time
If you want to take it that far, you could report it as a theft to the police. You wouldn't have to name your sister, but you could just claim you don't know who did it and the police might be able to have the bank watch the cards for transactions instead of canceling them. You might have a chance at catching her red-handed on store surveillance or using your card on her Amazon account or something.
No matter what I do I always misspeak. I don't know what's wrong with me.
What do you guys do when you're in a suicidal panic to calm yourself down? I never know what to do and I don't know what to do now.
>>54416>What do you guys do when you're in a suicidal panic to calm yourself down?
I self harm. It's genuinely the only thing that helps.
I've been repeatedly attempting to hang myself since age 7 and I've given myself some level of brain damage because of it (I've inexplicably fallen unconscious out of nowhere on several occasions) and I know it's vital for my health that I do not attempt suicide anymore under ANY circumstances. Yet I still feel suicidal, so to this end, a combination of
A. Cutting and,
Is the only thing that expels enough emotion from my body in order for me to continue surviving. Even when living in homeless hostels I would go out into the street in the dead of night in my pajamas and dressing gown and break glass jars in the street and collect the shards so I would have access to a bladed edge. It is the only tool I can utilize that genuinely helps. Alcohol just puts me in a stupor and costs money. Self harm is the only thing that kills the panic. I also believe some study learned that the sight of blood itself tends to have a calming effect on the self harmer. I don't cut because I hate myself. I like myself, I just do it because tangible physical pain overrides the messy, formless pain in my head.
I realise what I have just written is essentially an advertisement or endorsement of self harm. That is not what I intend. Please do not cut yourself unless you are quite literally in-front of a noose and have no other options.
>>54420>I like myself
I don't doubt you like yourself on the conscious level, but I doubt you do on the subconscious level.
Do you reward yourself at all of studying or just expect yourself to like it?
It's less that I like
myself, and more that I know better not to hate myself. I don't beat myself up for things I wouldn't hold against others. I don't hold myself to a higher standard that I wouldn't hold others to. I enjoy myself on a personality level, I like being in my head. I happen to have a bit of a severe facial dysmorphic disorder, this is really the only thing I hate about myself, just my face. I'm 5'7 and thin and I'm half Asian so I'm hardly SUPER ugly but it still gets to me. I would actually reverse things. I like myself on the subconscious level but not on the conscious level. On the conscious level all I see is my uggo face with this giant fucked nose my mom gave me.
I’m an actual terrible person. I can have really racist thoughts sometimes and am overall just a really angry person. Every single day I feel irritable about something. I don’t know what happened bc it wasn’t always like this.
I can sympathize, I kind of lost interest in anime these last few years and yet being a weeb still feels like a subculture I'm a "part" of despite of the fact I haven't actually watched anything that came out after, like, 2018?
Do you feel bad for having mean thoughts? If the answer is yes then it means that you aren't a terrible person. Almost everyone has bad thoughts when they are under stress or angry. It's up to you to use those bad feelings in a positive way. I like to do HIIT and Cardio which lets me let all of those negative feelings out while doing something productive.
heal yourself with an asian gf
Slow as heck response, sorry anon.
Got quarantined and that really spun me out.
Never got around to saying thank you for the pep talk anon.
I was in a really crummy headspace, but you did help me with it. Thank you.
As for the music, yeah.
It just feels like its not a safe
thing to do, you know?
It helps me cope when I'm on the train, or the bus, but you're meant to be aware of your surroundings.
Though not being aware of them is exactly the point of music in that instance.
I'm just glad I've been lucky enough it's not been an issue I suppose.
1. Dreamt Whoopi Goldberg pitched an idea for a movie: Friday the 13th, but with vegetarians (or a vegetarian version of Friday the 13th) and people loved it.
2. I think I just came across a guy who looked 80% - 90% like Stephen King, so my repressed nerdgasm converted my words to a semi-awkward mess.