/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Post paranoia, severe or light, about yourself or others

>talk to new contact
>mid conversation they suddenly appear offline and always have to doublecheck my friend list to see if they deleted me because of what I just said or if they're simply on phone/bad internet

A thread for the discussion of eating disorders. Anything goes, from anorexia to bulimia, orthorexia to binge-eating disorder etc.

>when did your ED first emerge?
>was there anything in particular that triggered it?
>how has it affected you as an individual?
>if they're aware, how have your family and friends reacted to it?
>have you ever deliberately encouraged its development?
>have you ever attempted recovery?
>did you ever participate in ED-centric online communities (i.e. MPA, LJ, Tumblr)?

Pro-ana thinspiration is disallowed as per rule 10.

(OP is River's Edge by Okazaki Kyoko)

Made a post here a year ago about my depression and just feelings of helplessness and overwhelming despair, I’ve experienced a lot of things since then but everything is essentially the same.

I think its called being passively suicidal when you don’t actively try to kill yourself but don’t really do anything to have a good life either. I’ve tried to become a better person but I just keep failing..I’ve gotten taken advantage of by a guy I trusted, let myself get taken advantage of by so many other guys, fallen out with so many friends… all in my head thinking this was what it was to be a normal person and experience all these new social things. I was overwhelmed and threw myself into everything I was too shy to do before, and now all I feel is dirty and ashamed.

It was not all entirely bad..had some accomplishments but I just feel hollow inside.

Does anyone get depressed watching anime bc all the characters are so young and their lives are so interesting and have so many possibilities? And thinking wow I used to be at that age but when I was that age I was a depressed hermit who had no friends and I still am now.

I feel like I’ll never be able to connect to anyone, I’m so lonely.

I need help with this, story time
>dated 2 years
>last 6 months of relationship be on and off because I can't handle how he made out and fingered an ex friend of mine months before we dated
> get mad that he sent nudes to a rando girl months before we dated
>also be sad that he had an ex gf that he had sex with
>be hurt everyday because he did all of this and don't know how to cope
> Get really mad at him, during a week of break up, I want to get revenge and end up making out with another guy and getting fingered by him
>happy that I got revenge but still feel disgusted with myself the situation
>months later I tell bf and he immediately breaks up with me
> cry and beg and doesnt work
> went no contact for 2 weeks, he messages me saying he misses me and asks for pic of me, etc. we talk, I ask if he wants to get back, he says no, I flip the fuck out on him and tell him never contact me again
>4 weeks later he messages me to check up on me, he tells me we should stay friends and stay in contact, he says im important to him, I flip the fuck out on him again and block him

Been 3 weeks now no contact, is there any chance he'll want to come back and date me again. He said I was really important to him but what I did really hurt him.

Any of you ladies ever be the first to approach a boy and ask him out? How did it go?

There's a cute boy that I work with and I have been giving him signs that I'm into him (Like biting my lip sometimes when speaking or listening to him.).

I'm not sure if he is just oblivious to my hints or if he plain doesn't like me. Should I just bite the bullet and ask him out first?

I thought it could be nice to have a vent thread for people graduating/who've had their professional life and education disrupted by covid.

I'm graduating in a week into a competitive creative field and have applied to the only two or three jobs im qualified for in my area. On the surface I'm still excited and I have faith in my abilities but I know it's going to be a lot harder than even I can comprehend. I've had no graduation ceremony, no end of year exhibition, subpar feedback from tutors, and no celebration at all. I'm probably gonna have to sign up for govt. assistance, look for a shitty regular job and maybe try freelancing for extra cash. Sounds silly but I was so excited to have 2020 be my graduating year cos of the round number, but now I just wish I'd take a year out or something.

Anyone else have great difficulty switching from one task to another? Sometimes this leads me to achieve what i wish but 99% of the time this brings me suffering. I used to think its due to being tired and sitting on my ass all day, but even as my lifestyles have changed i still face the same difficulties.

I am open to constructive criticism as it is impossible for to have done everything correctly.
It started out really nice as he turned out to be caring, thoughtful and really empathic. I might just say I’ve never met a person as kind as him (or now, as twisted as him tho, I might be wrong). He was always there, looking out for me, cheering for me.
The first red flag I noticed was the fact how stubborn he was being about wanting to know about a personal story of mine which somehow he managed to sniff. I didn’t want to talk to him about it and he was being difficult on wanting to know about it, so I finally gave up. Later when I confronted him about his behavior and how I felt forced to tell him the whole story, he apologised. Somehow everything was moving too fast when I don’t feel that close to him yet.
Our friendship went on as he would constantly put me down in front of everyone while complimenting someone else. Nothing I did was right in his eyes yet, a mere puff of someone else’s perfume is enough for him to be giving them compliments. Yet,he would always ask me out to dinner/lunch with him, giving me help (now, I think about it, was more of forcing help onto me although I’ve politely declined numerous times). At times, he would be very dismissive as much as even walking away when I’m talking yet sometimes, he would be very supportive.
He also had a habit of badmouthing just about anyone who he thinks is close to me. Whether it is on their work ethics or just that they’re genuinely bad ppl. Among those ppl, one of the person he talked about was his own bestie, whom he had been friends (A) with for atleast 3 years.
Since this toxic person has a high position in a project, he asked A to help him out on working as one of the team leaders in which I was one of the member. I saw how hard A worked to ensure that everything ran smoothly for the project. Yet, perhaps when this toxic being saw that me and my bestie was getting close to A, he started talking ill about them to me. He said that both A and my bestie, they’re not playing any active role in the project and that they don’t know how to do their job well. He even proceeded calling his bestie as someone who has been lazy ever since he knew him. Note that this toxic person was the one who reached out to A and my bestie for help.
As a team member, I did saw that A and my bestie, both actively played huge role to ensure that their task was completed successfully. It was only because Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

stuck in a depressive episode the past few weeks, if it weren't for corona id be outside doing fun things, hanging out with friends, or even just any semblance of real work.

its been a blur of fleeting thoughts of suicidal ideation, worthlessness, and coping by returning to my fujoshi weeb ways n watching anime, reading yaoi.

im in a privileged position and can afford to live this way which makes me feel worse. ppl w depression here how do u guys cope?