/feels/ - Advice & Venting

I went to a hair salon and got my hair done for $350 and I tipped $70 but I was unhappy with it (it just wasn't what I asked for) so I went back for the free adjustment they offer and got my hair finished. it looks much better but still a bit uneven

How do I know how much to tip for the adjustment part?

hi nonas! i''ve been friends with a guy (lets call him david) for around 2/3 months and we've become pretty close in that time. david's good friends with the brother of one of my friends, which is how we both met. my friend (mentioned above) often jokes about how david's my boyfriend. i also have other friends who joke about the possibility of the two of us being in a relationship. i see him everyday at school, while also texting him throughout the day (mostly after school). we've also hung out outside of school a few times. when we first started talking, it was the beginning on christmas break and we texted for literally the entire day for the entire week. sometimes we call, which usually lasts for about an hour or more (the most recent time was last night). he's told me a lot about himself, and his life. according to him, i am one of the 2 friends that he has. i actually DMed my friend's brother and asked him if it was normal for David to be as talkative as he was, and he told me that david isn't usually very talkative, and that it's not normal for him to talk to me as much as we do. i have also told him a lot about myself, and he often makes jokes about me being a NEET/femcel.

i've been getting a bit of an inkling that he might like me because of how much we talk. there's no overt flirting. the only things i can think of as flirting are realistically just me reading too much into jokes about his "rizz". according to my friend's brother, he would never be the one to confess first. he's also really nice to me in general. once, a friend suggested that i ask him for money as a joke. i did, and when he texted me back he asked me how much i needed, followed up by him saying that the answer was probably no, and then asking what the money was for. also, whenever he says something that he thinks has offended me, david immediately apologizes.

okay so, the most important part that's kind of where i'm the most hung up about this whole thing… i wouldn't consider myself attractive. i'm not like,,, ugly i guess. but i'm short and fat and it makes me feel like a bit of a creep for thinking that he likes me. david isn't like… a chad i guess (not that that really matters to me tbh) but he's definitely not unattractive. he's a pretty normal looking guy, i guess, but i find him pretty cute. maybe i'm a bit insecure because of my weight but it's not like he minds? he's made a few fat jokes about me in the past and then immediately apologized Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

…in my sleep nonetheless. When he openly lets it rip in front of me in the day and night. The next day he let me know, acting like he’s bringing it up randomly as a joke. He followed it up by claiming that “I shouldn’t worry about it” but he would prefer if I didn’t (as if I have control over it when I’m passed out). I’m at a loss of words because I legitimately thought this man was in love with me and this feels very distinctly not like love. Am I overreacting?

It’s been coming up more that I just have…no one to really talk to. The internet and colleagues are great for directed conversations about specific topics, which is all you need most of the time. But if something good happens or I’m proud, or something bad happens, there’s…nobody. For normal people even if they don’t have friends or a therapist or a fucker they have family. Or if they don’t have family they have old, old friends. They have “lifetime people”. Even if they haven’t talked in years, if they really need to they have someone that knows them. There’s no replicating this if you missed the various dice rolls to get lifetime people. By late 20s/early 30s, it’s done. Everyone you build a relationship already has lifetime people, and those lifetime people will always be more real to them than you. You are just an episodic person for them, relatively speaking. There are little support forums where someone will essentially roleplay as one of your lifetime people, but that’s like eating wax fruit. There’s no fixing it. There’s nothing and no one. Forever.

i'm such a sore loser i always act like a baby when i lose. yesterday i played a card game with my bf and 2 friends i lost every round. yes it was my first time playing it but i wanted to fucking cry.

Or just any time between my birth year and 2016, honestly.

So, something weird happened to me at New Year's Eve.

I had been awake earlier than I wanted to (about 4 AM?). And stayed down with my eyes closed but I felt as if I was in 2016.

Yes, I know it sounds schizo. But I felt like I was that terminally online teen who was obsessed with Dangan Ronpa and Melanie Martinez again.

And it was a genuinely nice moment. Now, as an adult, I try my best to move forward– I have no other choice but to.

But damn, since then it seems as if my brain is unable to move on.

I wish I can awaken back in my home state to my DanganRonpa RP friends spewing their usual brainrot but also I want to make the most of my time and learn that cool skill or three, et cetera.

I keep ruining relations due to mental health.
I have 1 friend who I can talk to, but I don't like to burden them with my problems.

I had a decent bf, he did the dishes for me, showed me off, bought me gifts, had a stable job, good relationship with his family, etc. But due to my mental illness, I accused him of cheating with no proof - just based off a hunch. We broke up a few times but this time it feels final.
He's no longer the adoring man he once was, but now I'm lucky to hear from him once a day. I know my outbursts changed his opinion on me.

To make this post less about a moid, I also have a turbulent relationship with my mom. I don't see her often but when I do we eventually get on each other's nerves and end up bickering.

I feel like I'm drowning in my own mind, but anyone that tries to save me gets pulled under.

What are some green flags you like to see in men?

I have been raped 2 times in my life, and SA another 2 times. My BF helped me to get through a couple of those, i really thought he was the only non-evil man in existence.
Recently i noticed that he follows porn accounts that post rape fantasies…
What should i do?, i'm so tired… I'm sorry if I don't post more about my thoughts on the situation, I just don't know what to think.

Even when I was at my lowest weight, I was still unhappy with my physical appearance. I hated how deeply this illness affected me physically and mentally. I could not go to outings, I could not go for lunch with friends, I couldn't eat in front of others without feeling embarrassed or as if I was eating too little that someone would notice or too much. Eventually, people began noticing of course. My friends would comment on how thin I was getting, how I was "body goals". Their elders (all women) also commented and praised me for how thin I had been getting. Of course I thanked them for the compliments, I was very appreciative of compliments from my friends and their elders. In my mind all I could think about was how horrible I felt, how terribly this illness is impacting my life.

I looked in every mirror. The mirror was my biggest enemy. I watched parts of me become slimmer and bonier. But I was still unsatisfied. This illness will be with me permanently. I've sought help, I was doing well for a while, thought I had finally become a winner in an aspect of my life I was struggling in the most. Wrong. It comes back, and it only gets worse. Depriving myself of everything my body needs to sustain itself just to feel satisfied with my appearance.

I am moderately stable as of this moment. I feel myself slipping again and I'm afraid.

If you struggle with this I'd love to read about how you are working to overcome it or even any similar vents. Have you ever been satisfied with the way you look in your eating disorder? Even when you have felt satisfied with your appearance, did you feel as if you had to keep getting worse? If you've recovered, do you ever miss how sick you were? Did you find normality in your sickness?