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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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Please read the rules! Last update: 04/27/2021

11996d238d45b493b6…

Moid rant Anonymous 131476[Reply]

Why can't guys be consistent?

I haven't had a lot of relationships but the two I had ended on the same thing, guys act a certain way at first and once they have you they slowly stop doing the small gestures, the romance, the flirting, the effort, they stop being as compassionate and understanding. They slowly become meaner and ruder.

You will eventually find yourself having to discuss with them the fact that they aren't acting the same way, I don't believe there is a man out there that can keep consistent without being told to do so. Either that; or, they just tell you you're being dramatic and that they haven't changed.

What is the scientific or psychological reason for this besides selfishness? Who are they fooling and do they really think we are that stupid to think that "nothing has changed"?…

Anonymous 131477

>>131476
The scientific reason is when they met you dopamine flooded their brain every time they were with you so it was easy to do nice things and be romantic. after a while the novelty wears off and there is less dopamine so it's like watching a movie you have already seen 500 times and you just want to be done with it.

a mature man knows that doing genuinely nice things and serving they ones they love will bring them joy, even if it doesn't seem like it will.

also porn has rotted men's brains so good luck finding a good one.


783b70b384a4c93a65…

just graduated hs, what do i do? Anonymous 131170[Reply]

im going to a state school in august. i wanted to know, what is something you wish you did at this point in life?
3 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 131187

>>131178
Back then i allowed my loneliness get to me and i started hanging out with people that i normally wouldn't. I became friends with people just because they liked me, not because i liked them, at the same time i was too afraid to make friends with people that i actually liked.

Anonymous 131272

>>131187
i get that, i hope you are doing well <3

Anonymous 131273

I also graduate a couple months ago and feel very lost, I didn't really have any friends left after high school and I don't know what I'm gonna do for work, my anxiety is eating me up and I can't even get out of bed until the afternoon most days. I'm tempted to kill myself but at the same time I know that wouldn't solved anything because eventually I'll be out of this bullshit and be looking back and be like "oh I can't believe I was so freaked out". I feel like I'm in some weird purgatory where I can't just calm down and relax but I also am trying not to let myself spiral out of control

Anonymous 131275

>>131187
> I became friends with people just because they liked me
lol yeah this usually ends up poorly

Anonymous 131445

>>131170
i wish i had stayed away from older men


IMG_1474.jpeg

smth smth relationships Anonymous 130847[Reply]

why are guys so indifferent and aloof? by that i mean, why do most guys not even try to put up a front that they care about what you’re saying?

im honestly so tired of the dudes who claim to “want an autistic girl” and shit, but then act completely uninterested when you want to ramble about your interests. i know this is a thing for a lot of ppl, not even just moids and you can’t force someone to be interested in what you say, but i just think it’s stupid when you’re actively trying to get into a relationship. personally for me, i’m schizoaffective, not autistic, but i tend to latch onto my interests and they consume most of my time.

im the kind of person who likes talking about random stuff, so the conversation doesn’t have to be centered around what i like, but why claim in the first place that you care when you really don’t? i know why, it’s just frustrating— especially when you have less typically “feminime” or cool interests. as a girl i feel like it’s only cool to guys if you like their shitty taste in music or you pretend to enjoy rlly niche films to put on your letterboxd. ik that sounds hateful, and i dont dislike anyone who genuinely enjoys that stuff, i just wish guys tried to be interested in what their gfs liked as well. it’s really easy for me to talk about it with girls, most of them care beyond having a specific self-serving reason to listen, and some nerdier guys as well. but 90% of men won’t even try, unless they can pivot the conversation to something sexual or about themselves. if anyone has experienced the same or has advice, pls lmk. i enjoy reading replies anyways.
5 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 130870

They don’t like autistic girls because of their neurodivergence, but because they perceive them as naïve. They can’t maintain relationships with neurotypical women because they miss social expectations that have nothing to do with neurodivergence and everything to do with being poorly raised, emotionally immature, and unwilling to take responsibility for being a decent person. So they prey on you instead, hoping you’ll be gullible enough to take on all the domestic and emotional labor while they ignore you until they want sex. In their ideal setup, you stay occupied with your hobbies, ask for very little, and only exist when it’s convenient for them.

Anonymous 131437

>>130870
Assuming the worst about people's intentions and reasons is why people become miserable like this. People generally want "autistic" people to date, simply because they want someone passionate with hobbies who aren't normies. That's it. Making up evil or insecure reasons for others actions just isolates you more.

Anonymous 131439

>>131437
Without love, it cannot be seen…

But to be fair this is still a pretty retarded(superficial) reason to want someone autistic.

Anonymous 131441

>>131439
Slightly autistic people are simply easier to love.
If they were the type of autistic that snapped at everyone because they were over stimulated it would be a different story.

Anonymous 131442

>>131441
Liking someone for “not being a normie” and “having special interests” is not liking them for their autism. It may sound better than the previous example, however it’s still just as superficial - only the image of autism.

If you are autistic yourself, if you had a lot of close experience with autistic people (and so learning to accept them, as you would do with any other person) and just get along with them better, now this is the type of reason that has meaning. You may actually love the person themselves.

“Slightly autistic”. “Easier to love”. A childish idea.


20260514_112909.jp…

i hate work i hate i hate work i hate work i hate work i Anonymous 130572[Reply]

>girlboss it in the trades nona! rosie the riveter, nona!
>lots of money there nona!
>learn skills nona!
>it's not like the old days anymore nona!
>you definitely won't end up face-down ass-up on a disgusting man's disgusting truck floor like the world's least expensive prostitute nona!
If there are any other nonas in trades here - how do you put up with this world???
i could rant for HOURS but basically while i actually enjoy fixing things and being active and i don't mind getting a bit greasy, i just cannot deal with the people in this business. 95% of guys in trades are literal stone age far-left-of-the-IQ-bell-curve cavemen who salivate at any useless shiny bauble that says "Milwaukee" or "Snap-On" on it and THROW their money at the salesman offering 50% interest financing plans, condemning themselves and the GFs and wives they often somehow have to a life of debt slavery
My sister is like "oh at least there are hot guys" lmao these guys inhale hot dogs and soda and "self-medicate" totally avoidable bad knees with weed and vape. The soundtrack to every day is my colleague's douchecore spotify algo playlist (literally Nickelback, late Eminem i.e. "Ass Like That" and Thong Song and Kid Rock). Not attractive
The couple (literally 2) cute and possibly interesting boys I've met in this business have been taken and too painfully shy/awkward to get to know well respectively
Everything is filthy and disorganized and if you try to be a bit more orderly and organized yourself, apparently that makes you a princess
the vehicles are all disgusting because apparently guys who drive them all have no self-respect
I feel like my friends are slipping away because we can't relate to one another's daily lives and when I get home I just feel exhausted and like time is passing with no way to differentiate one day, week, month from another
Anyway that's all, just getting older with a wrench in my hand and my ass in the air and my face in the dirt

Anonymous 130604

I did a bit of tradie type work for a little while and it inspired me to go back to college. The work itself wasn't bad but I can't stand the type of people who do manual labor. They are all egotists and/or have huge chips on their shoulders. Tons of low iq out of shape people who are always trying to posit themselves as better then someone else and put each other down. That, or they're drug addicts, or maybe both. I knew that if I had to spend 40+ hours a week around these people for the rest of my life I would eventually snap and shoot up my workplace. I feel genuine sympathy for any intelligent decent person who just likes carpentry or whatever and has to deal with this all the time.

Anonymous 130861

>>130604
I live in a nice area and a manual labor guy helped me jumpstart my car I wish I bought him a coffee or something

Anonymous 130862

>>130861
Im gonna think about my mishap here the rest of my life

Anonymous 130955

>>130572
no advice but I just want to say I read your post and I want to say I feel for you. I wish I could give you a hug. <3 maybe you could try talking to that shy guy again? in my experience, they say they really like being talked to but can't express it in the moment.

Anonymous 131267

>>130572
Are you a car mechanic?
Why don't you get a job in aviation maintenance?
They're much organized because of tool control requirements for aircraft.
You're still going to see people throw their money away on tools, but they make more money so maybe they're more financially responsible considering their income.


you.PNG

This little green bitch Anonymous 130997[Reply]

You see this thing? This is literally you. All of you. In fact I even saw one of you cosplay it in person. Looked just like her. Insane behavior really.
6 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 131221

>>130997
Is this that fairy from that pedophile loli rape game? I dont know how you can use that against women at all

Anonymous 131222

>>131221
A short and skinny white woman chose to attend one of the most crowded cons in America dressed like that. If you feel disgusted then consider how I felt that day.

Anonymous 131223

>>131003
No we werent

Anonymous 131224

>>131222
would you prefer for her to have been black instead

Anonymous 131227

>>131224
Society has deemed that as more acceptable. Think of that what you will.
https://sites.psu.edu/aspsy/2022/03/16/the-effects-of-pornographic-media-on-black-intimacy-and-perceptions-of-black-women/


94df30fd3fae49ac44…

boy problems Anonymous 130934[Reply]

hi girlies i feel like me and he are drifting apart he made me really upset the day before yesterday so i ghosted him for like a day and even when we were talking i was giving him the cold shoulder i didn't know he was in manic episode he acted on impulse and made some mistakes i feel so guilty for ruining his life he doesn't blame but he said that i deserve better than him and that it's over for him now :(
10 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 131007

they always come back

Anonymous 131041

>>131007
i meannn that's a good thing right?

Anonymous 131042

>>131007
no they do not lol

Anonymous 131209

its so over

Anonymous 131215

>>131209
we made up it's okay


GuXHSe5bIAAspTW.jp…

Anonymous 131040[Reply]

How do I build confidence and make friends? I get anxious and easily exhausted talking to people, but I feel lonely.
I'm an adult, and it feels like it's too late to find friends or people like me. I want to post about the topics I find interesting on social media and see if I attract like-minded people, but then I feel cringy (I don't think people who do it are cringe, it just feels stupid when I do it). If I start putting significant effort into posting my views, I start getting paranoid thoughts about never actually making friends, just having my posts incorporated into a LLM, eventually seeing some soulless influencer regurgitate my statements word-for-word because AI gave it to them and seeing other people comment "Wow, that's a great point! Followed!".

Anonymous 131044

Stop worrying about being cringe. Who gives a fuck? Are you going to deny yourself a potentially better life because some retard felt uncomfortable for half a second? Fuck em and just be your weird self

Anonymous 131207

just talk to random people or co-workers to get good at small talk, be friendly and remember things about people (in a non weird way), people will want to be friends with you.


63acd0d8ebff22790c…

Anonymous 129602[Reply]

i hate seeing girls like the same things i like i feel like im always out for male validation even though im not interested in men… i feel like my life as a woman has no worth because im fat and ugly. im relapsing into bulimia and my mouth is rotting away. im out of school, i cant get a job and my friends always exclude me in selfies when we hang out because im so ugly. everyone i talk to is a transgirl i have no cisgirl friends and im scared of them all. when im done reading, playing games or watching anime for the day i realize how sad my life is and i want to kill myself.honestly im afraid of anyone that isnt a tranny. i hate seeing pretty girls i hate seeing cosplayers. i really want them to all die someday. i always forget im autistic until i speak to real people and then i realize theres just no hope for me.

Anonymous 129603

haah even posting this i feel like im close to a panic attack . im so scared of everything

Anonymous 129606

maybe be happy on ur own before you can be happy with someone else. and then you can find the right person for you to enjoy life with

Anonymous 129607

um for what it's worth i like the picture you posted do you have more cute images like that

Anonymous 129615

sammmee im ruining my already ugly appearance with bulimia wooo! I relate to everything ye said so at least ur not alone. Is there a place in this world fr people like us I wonder

Anonymous 131024

>>129602

List your best memories.
List your worst memories.

Bulimia will make you more ugly.

Men who like kids do not like kids. They just like the idea of abusing someone, being stronger, smarter or older enough to manipulate them.

Being autistic just makes you be avoided because you are not happy, you are not healthy, and autism is socially acceptable only when you meet those two criteria (happy, healthy) because most people (who are not autistic) often are not honest enough because of social reasoning. And end up in consequence, being unhappy and miserable.

Live your best life, nona, there is still hope


9e37e7e8966fb5eecf…

I hate how invasive troons are. Anonymous 129459[Reply]

A few days ago I was contacted by a troon asking to be friends, I thought it was okay since I don't have any female friends.
I talked to him for a while until he asked me to do VC, his voice was that of an effeminate man.
The worst part is that I can't even stop talking to him or ghosting him because he could expose me as "transphobic".
I feel stupid for not noticing it sooner; it was so obvious. He was acting very "feminine" in a forced and performative.
If I don't answer he starts spamming me, also he asked me if he could do "yuri" with my character and his (I'm an artist btw).
I have to live with this torture if I want to live, I hate modern society.
7 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 130624

>>129519
last year my gay dorm RA tried to stay in my bedroom while I changed tops because he's gay and that apparently makes it ok
i got really anxious because i'm socially awkward and it was really hard to get him to leave in a way that sounded like friendly banter and not like i was extremely uncomfortable because literally all my friends and everyone around thinks he's a great guy, and i didn't want to seem homophobic or make things awkward
so, i think i can understand where OP is coming from here, if this person actually can create social consequences for her

Anonymous 130649

>>130624
Is this an NA thing? In my region gay men never stay in the room when you are changing even women leave, what in the lack of privacy you all have going on?? Your nakedness is your own to share with who you choose. It is one thing if you are in an area where nudity is common, we do have such areas but seriously??? In YOUR bedroom??? Know your rights. You have the right to personal space it is in UN rights of a child and an adult. You also have the right to have relationships or the lack thereof. Don't be letting people talk you out of your rights as a human or call you evil for exercising them.

Anonymous 130653

>>130649
same poster as
>>130624
it's a virtue signaling thing, i think anyway, at its root, maybe the influence of social media and tv as well, the idea that girls and gay guys are on the same team or smth and that they're automatically good people because of oppression
for example, the girls' bathroom on my dorm floor was literally declared "girls and gays" in the first week of first semester, they even put up a sign on the door lol
and kept letting the guys use it even after the two gay guys on our floor continually left the toilet seat up, left pubic hair on the seat and even left the toilet unflushed a few times, and left the sinks a mess, and that's not to mention the shower situation
obviously i wasn't comfortable at all and i started showering at like 5 am to be as sure as possible there wouldn't be guys in there. at least there were no trannies, thank god
and i think girls (like me) who are actually made really uncomfortable with gay men overstepping boundaries still cooperate because of social pressure. i'd love to say that i stood up for myself and said something, but if i had that kind of self-confidence i probably wouldn't be posting on crystal cafe

Anonymous 131021

Something that would work is to say the most sad thing. Lie.

Say you have anxiety, that you take pills. Say that you feel so bad sometimes you have to take more pills to sleep.

Say that you are in therapy and that it does not work properly.

Make him feel like a monster, some men will dislike the idea of being a monster because it means they will be outcasted, humilliated and ridiculized.

Victimize yourself and use it for your advantage, calculating uselessness is worth bucks.

Anonymous 131023

op you should stop talking to him asap, he is clearly into you and will try to get you to send nudes or something eventually


775cdb89c6ab3e15c0…

Anonymous 130265[Reply]

What is dating like?

30 and never been asked on a date or had a BF.
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 130299

OP are you abstinent by choice or not because you look great and I'm sure lots of guys and even other women would date you

Anonymous 130311

GoeK_3AWkAAfzeS.pn…

Terrible and wonderful, depending on who you end up dating. Guys are either total moron apes with no sense of class, or absolute gentlemen but those are rare. I broke up wjth my long term gf of a couple years a few months ago and started dating. I got some matches on tinder and went on a couple dates, one of the guys was a complete fuckboy but i wanted to try out guys. He didnt hold doors, asked to pay half of the bill, drove a beat up old car, and was very insistent on going with him to an underground dj set that night. I left early and unmatched him. On the other side, i found an amazing guy that i wasnt too crazy about looks wise but we had so much in common,like playing same games and have similar hobbies, we clicked very quickly. He's polite, likes my jokes and goofy demeanor, holds doors open for me, and takes me out on cute dates all the time. I return the favor by cooking him delicious home made food he can reheat after he comes home from work over the course of the week.

The key is to not just look for attraction, but find a companion that will be your best friend and who you can rely on. Dating shitty guys feels like a waste of time and is unfulfilling, maybe you might get some action but its kinda hollow and tbh I get off better by myself. Try stuff out, get out of your comfort zone, and trust your gut.

Btw im 31 myself

Anonymous 130312

>>130265
it was the best experience of my life, albeit that's because she was the most amazing, wonderful person ever.
but being single is enjoyable too

Anonymous 130313

>>130299
its not actually op its catfish

Anonymous 131022

>>130313
>>130265
Why are zoomers even obsessed with her? she looks like a bloated taylor swift, she edits her pics like no tomorrow at least taylor shows her real face


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