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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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Please read the rules! Last update: 04/27/2021

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Anonymous 121683[Reply]

how do you girls deal with murderous&homicidal thoughts? im not actually going to act on it, but whenever i get angry i immediately fantasize about murder. and its been real bad lately after coming across a lot of moids on 4chan. i know that if someone actually attempted to physically hurt me or rape me id most likely go through with it but i find myself having these thoughts simply because i dislike other people. and its not purely intrusive thoughts either… idk sorry mods if this isnt allowed

Anonymous 121684

oh and i should add that i only get these thoughts with men tbh

Anonymous 121687

I read violent yaoi because in my head men are also not safe and the stronger ones than them will give them the same violence they can give to women

Anonymous 121711

I only get those thoughts with my bf. Might break up with him.

Anonymous 121713

>>121687
And what does the violent ones get? Poison?

Anonymous 121714

>>121713
Shot to death by 33 bullets



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this needs to get off my chest Anonymous 121592[Reply]

i've been friends with this girl ever since my first year of college. we got along and she made me realize that life isn't always about your final sat score or your gpa. that maybe its about the little things that happen.
when i started to get comfortable with her, i realized i changed a bit. like, not in a good way- but in a bad way. it was frightening because i was saying yes to things she asked me to do with her that 17 year old me would've never agreed to back then.
she used to bully this one girl that we'd see usually and thought it was funny if we got her socials and kept sending her grabify links to log into her instagram, snap, tiktok, etc. i agreed.
i hesitated when she sent me the link so i could go send it to her but she insisted. and so i did. we then got access to her instagram. then her snap, then her tiktok. i knew it was wrong but i still did it.


i told an old friend from high-school about it and she told me that we were both wrong, but she should've never dragged me in if i she was insisting.
was this bad influence? or am i severely at fault here?
6 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 121626

>>121614
her hurting your feelings a little was worse than fucking hacking someone? it’s a serious crime whether it’s illegal there or not. you’re a creep whether you’re a man or not. i literally don’t believe you hacked her and then looked at nothing. who would? that’s clearly not what happens. and who would spy on someone and obsess over someone they think is a loser? you were both clearly jealous of something and interested in SOMETHING to HACK HER.

Anonymous 121627

>>121615
yeah it’s pathetic. this is the creepiest thing ive seen a nona confess to and they do it defending themselves? like they want us to forgive them and no?

Anonymous 121628

>we got along and she made me realize that life isn't always about your final sat score or your gpa. that maybe its about the little things that happen.
caring abt ur gpa and sat is more valuable than softbullying and uhh hacking a girl

Anonymous 121629

>>121628
i love the correlation between both of their gpas falling past caring about them as their obsession with this girl they stalked grew. karma.

Anonymous 121681

That's not how grabify works. Shit bait 0/10, you need to be 18+ to post here



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Anonymous 120904[Reply]

>logs in
>e-bf "logs out" as soon as I send him a good morning text
This relationship is over, isn't it? He's probably talking to some other girl already.
2 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 120907

>>120906
Thank you, I'll save this
>>120905
I know my life is pathetic

Anonymous 121091

>>120904
You aren't losing anything. Let him be that way. Stop caring about fake pixels on the screen.

Anonymous 121261

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Anonymous 121265

My e-bf always keeps his status off and it makes me mad

Anonymous 121638

>e-bf
lol



breaking-up-and-di…

Anonymous 121601[Reply]

Why do people get married only to cheat or divorce? Shouldn't they know if they're happy to be together BEFORE they get married?
3 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 121611

Your brain keeps changing and evolving as you get older. The younger you are, the faster you change. People are expected to marry young…

It's a recipe for disaster. You will change. He will change. You divorce if lucky. If unlucky you end up stuck hating each other in a loveless performative measure with cheating as your only personal outlet.

Anonymous 121617

My dad cheats but will not divorce because he thinks it will be the social death of my mother and that is more cruel to her than being cheated on. This was true maybe like 30 years ago not right now. My mother stays because they own stuff together and dividing it is a waste of money. The marriage was over back in 2019-2020 but the illusion must continue.

Anonymous 121618

>>121617
If you ever hear my mother talk about love , marriage and kids you will get the feeling that you are talking to an unmarried woman in her mid 20s waiting for the right man.

Anonymous 121619

A lot of moids marry with an implicit desire to cheat. Sometimes, they do it because they're too unattractive for regular hookups. Sometimes, they genuinely believe that it's somehow okay when moids do it.

Anonymous 121633

thats why my bf proposed to sign a contract upon marriage that will make him bankrupt if he cheats or mistreats me



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I am so BORED with life. Anonymous 120113[Reply]

How do I create some “magic” in my daily routines?

It seems as if all I do is a TON of college coursework that is made even more difficult because I live with family who want me to work on their schedule (which means studying and finishing + submitting work can’t be done in the house since I must be available to their every beck and call). So I have to cram for hours while in college.

This constant work and stress cycle has left me feeling stagnant and bored. How can I not feel like kms every single day?

I considered saving money to rent a motel room for the weekend, for starters.

Anonymous 120162

This might be shit advice but I just try to find things to get excited about, it doesn't have to be anything big, sometimes I try to get obsessed over media or something so I'll be excited to spend time consuming it. Could be a hobby or some little treat you grant yourself on a certain day. lowkey jealous of the yumejoshi bc they always seem to get excited about doing things related to their waifu/husbando, way better than getting obsessed over someone real since you can't get hurt or disappointed either

Anonymous 120163

Sounds like your family is just being a big bitch and making shit dificult for no reason.
Instead of a motel, maybe try renting a cheap air bnb, you may have to be willing to drive out to find something affordable for a week long stay. I did this a few times years ago and helped me destress from my families petty bullshit.
Otherwise you could try spending all your time at the library, but I'm a nerd so I like quiet spaces

Anonymous 121631

>>120113
Go outside and get lost. Look around and just look out and see something that makes you go "I want to go THERE. I want to see THAT." Wander out, preferrably walk there, it helps you internalize and appreciate the trip.
Treat it like you're an RPG protaganist, because your really are



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tryharded life but failed maybe Anonymous 120115[Reply]

>be me, young girl
>not really sure what i want to do in life
>figure that if i work hard in school i can get a good job, make money, and raise a family
>do that
>date a guy my age for 6 years, doesn't work out
>ok
>start dating a new guy my age, i love him but he's kinda broke
>graduate with a STEM degree, 4.0 GPA
>no jobs hiring STEM undergrads, want higher degree/experience
>ok
>start grad school as a PhD student
>doing a good job
>exhausted from working on my thesis every day
>paid crumbs, live in shitty apartment
>realize i'm 25
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.
45 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 121294

>>121259
Just people on the internet. You know, the most credible source of info out there haha

Anonymous 121297

Glad our advice helped you nona, hopefully that other moid kills himself so he doesn't leach off another naive nona

Anonymous 121376

You want too much for a world that's crashing very badly. You should be grateful you can pursue any career at all and are not forced to protest on streets about the price of wheat. I am not from USA so 90s and 50s were all equally horrid. My mother and my grandmother all of them worked multiple jobs to feed their kids, and even though grandma's husband was military man he just ate too much so that kids had nothing left after he had his part. Being a caretaker IS being a breadwinner. As a mother, you will be the only one who cares and the only one who will have to actually sacrifice something for them. Whenever that's fulfilling is another question, but you seem to have an idea that having kids is supposed to be easy way out, when it's not. Get a perspective. You were not born to laze around, you were not born aristocrat. You can still have kids if you want it but given how you think about your whole situation, you actually don't. You really aren't ready for the lifelong labor that it entails. Men don't really care about children, they lie when they claim to do; and thus they will betray you one way or the other if you expect them to help you with raising kids. Some will lose their jobs, others cheat, third ones beat and drink, the fourth one will be escaping family relations with work and your children will never see him and have same mentality as single-mothered children. Et cetera, the ways men betray their children is endless. There is no winning here because they really REALLY do not care. In any case being a sahm is privilege, a dream; not a right. Having a job however is a right since that's what your own survival depends on. A lot of people nowadays can't even get that much and are forced to be forever their parents dependants with no way forward. Back in the days in European villages there was a custom to keep youngest daughter tied to her parents to take care of household when they are old; she would never have a right for kids or love and when the parents eventually died she was 45-50 out of commission for marrying, growing old and weak herself, forced to be a beggar and abusestock at her brothers family (if they took her at all). Would you like to be born to be that type of "caretaker"?

Anonymous 121474

>>120115
it's really hard econonically right now. honestly, people like to say if you work hard you'll make money and live well, but the truth is, that the wealthy are making 5-10% a year on their assets while the economy grows at 1%. and with that money they buy more assets, increasing that rate. that means houses and rent will continue to go up, services will continue to get worse and more expensive. ordinary people get poorer when the rich get richer. you and your bf would have done enough to own your own home and live very comfortably in the mid-20th century. so don't feel like a failure in a system that makes it extremely hard to just get by.

Anonymous 121625

>>120406
Retarded literally means being behind in development. Kids aren't retarded if they're well developed for their age. That said, emotional isolation from either of the parents leads to at least partial retardation.



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do bad things happen as much as ppl say? Anonymous 120729[Reply]

I have rly low empathy even for friends and I constantly find it very hard to believe that 'bad things' actually happen to people. I've had friends tell me about being assaulted and stuff and even though I don't show it on the outside I am internally thinking 'she is probably lying for attention'. I go through life and people are always really nice to me and they're generally pretty rational, polite, decent, so I find it hard to believe bad things like that actually happen as much as people say they do. Like every person I know seems to say they've been assaulted or something. Is this sort of thing actually normal or am I some kind of sociopath? Or is it just cuz I'm privileged? I can't help but believe people just make this stuff up for attention.
11 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 121553

>>121522
I disagree the whole reason I have an inflated sense of worth is because I know people are often shitty. No more than anything they live to poison your mind, mental health, gaslight you, or just drive you off the road at any opportunity.

I have like one solid rock in life but holy fuck people are filthy. I think theyre frequently below me YES because I'm often proven right. They prove they are cannibals one way of another. Why should I care what they want or believe ? Why should I believe what they say ?? A person has to prove who they are before I give a fuck about them.

I won't stop looking down on people until they give me a reason not to.

Anonymous 121556

What do you mean, bad things? Robbery? Battery? Cancer? Rape? Getting felt up in a crowd?

I'm certain sexual assault is way underreported. I'm just an ugly weirdo who never goes out or talks to anyone and even I've been groped, and when I redeemed my free scrotoid thinking a romantic relationship would alleviate my loneliness, he pressured me into sex, held me down, tried to control me financially, all the usual things men do to socialize.

Anonymous 121557

>>120729
My hot and controversial take is that you're not wrong. Who knows what's good or bad?

Anonymous 121572

>>120729
you’re probably not even an actual sociopath, just an asocial neet who never leaves the house. nothing bad ever happens to you because i’m guessing very little at all happens to you.

Anonymous 121573

>>121556
women with male friends and partners, women who go to school, women who go to social events, women who use substances, women are socially naive or shy or easily pushed around, autistic women, any kind of woman who struggles with boundaries or are socially isolated.. like what do you think happens to shy lonely women who hang out with very few people and end up alone with a creep who sees they would lose everything socially for speaking up? do you think most boyfriends are patient when waiting to get laid? men will push women to over indulge on substances or pretend they are more wasted than they are to come on to women inappropriately. it’s fucking constant and most women at high risk have multiple risk factors.



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Can my bf be saved? Anonymous 107458[Reply]

>Is fully aware of mistreatment against women in his community and says the women should always have their best interest in mind
>Hates Andrew T_te & his content and can perfectly explain why it’s bad for men & young boys
>never compliments other women even when I put them in his face and always brings the topic back to me to compliment my appearance
>always listens to me and considers my feelings and opinions

>Asked me if my hymen is still in-tact

>Says that the same body count means differently in a relationship for men & women because of “biological instincts”
>saw an onlyfans ad on his phone one time
>Did once stare at women (while screen sharing) when I think he thought I wasn’t looking (like the sceeen froze)

For context, we’re both young. Is he a lost cause? He’s really kind & caring so this sucks.
36 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 109198

>>108538
Nothing stops you from calling moids sluts

Anonymous 121379

He is misandrust and only makes exception for you on the height of emotions. He is kind and caring right now as means to earn your trust.
Do what you will with that.

Anonymous 121392

>>121379
i think you mean misogynist right?

Anonymous 121529

>>107458
>>Says that the same body count means differently in a relationship for men & women
But… isn't body count is different for men and women tho?
Its much easier to accumulate a high body count as a woman than it is as a man.
Everyone who's ever experimented with making a mans fake profile on a dating app vs a womans fake (or real) profile will know its true.
Doesn't mean men with a high bodycount are therefore better, absolutely not.
Just because its hard and takes a lot of effort to drink an entire bottle of vodka without falling over blackout drunk doesn't mean its a good thing and something to be proud of, its not.
Its still degenerate and I wouldn't want a manwhore with a high bodycount.
But I'd say it IS a different dynamic.

By the way this post is only about the pure number of "bodycount" without any context, just the simple act of having s*x with multiple different partners.
Because, at least for me and I assume a lot of you, its obviously NOT about s*x, its about getting an actual relationship with a loyal caring and kind BF, and thats just as hard for us as it is for them, if not harder (because I haven't managed to do so yet).

>>107476
>“biological instincts” is definitely a red flag
I probablly agree with that. Would need to ask the BF to clarify and explain first before jumping to conclusions tho.

Anonymous 121535

>>121529
>a different dynamic
Just because it's easier for women (supposedly) doesn't mean the overall meaning of the bodycount has changed.



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Anonymous 121496[Reply]

My father is having an affair with his colleague and with another friend of his and I think an emotional affair with another one. The colleagues are women and the friend is a man.
This is very shocking due to his overtly homophobic nature. All those years while my mother was abusing and neglecting me my father was having affairs and letting me stay in hell. They both don't love each other so idc UGH FUCK THIS. I have always suspected him because he used to project on my mom a lot during fights.
Also is bisexuality heritable?! Because I'm one too. Oh god. Found this all through on his computer. Why today. Sleep deprived and getting the confirmation that my entire family is a lie. No wonder I have always felt that marriage or having a family was maybe not for me. I will probably never tell my mom even though I hate her sm.

Anonymous 121498

i'm pretty sure homosexuality is heritable to some degree and would extend to bisexuality for obvious reasons, doesn't mean you'll end up a filthy cheater though

i say tell her and watch it all crash and burn

Anonymous 121499

>>121498
She is dependent on him financially. Also she has called him homophobic slurs in past. So there is a chance she knows



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I feel like socially inept women just suffer more than socially inept men. Anonymous 109789[Reply]

Men are far more satisfied with self-focused and solitary lives. Being unable to socialize hits a woman much harder because we're more socially driven. Yet men get a loneliness epidemic and we don't. Why? Do we not vocalize how we feel enough? What's the board's thoughts?
111 posts and 5 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 121356

>>121335
Yep, best cope for extroverted people ever. Just a polite little language model that is programmed to be friendly kek

Anonymous 121361

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>>110549
>Meanwhile, where is the female equivalent?
Why, Crystal Cafe of course!

Anonymous 121386

>>121361
We all know that CC is just full of guys pretending to be women, mtf freaks and the works, you really think there is women here?

Anonymous 121387

>>121386
even if there were women here its too slow and disorganized

Anonymous 121408

>>109844
needed this



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