I often fantasize about being a guy. Everything would just be so much easier. I would just be seen as a baseline normal human by society and not an object of sexual desire. I don't like being asked out by men. It always seems so weird to me:
>You don't know me! Why are you asking me out? You know nothing about me, my interests, my hobby, my personality. Why do you act interested in me? Why not just get to know me first? You are obviously only interested in me because "muh dick".

I need to get cruel revenge on my boyfriend. What do I do? It wouldn't matter too much if I fucked someone else.

My self-loathing is getting to be unbearable. I hate myself so, so much. I feel so much shame just for existing: I'm embarrassed when I eat, I'm embarrassed when I do things I enjoy, I'm deeply embarrassed by how I walk, talk, look, everything about me I hate and am ashamed of and I wish I were exaggerating or just being dramatic. People seeing me makes me want to disappear, looking in the mirror makes me want to cover them up. How do you help yourself if you truly don't feel like you deserve it? Doing "fun" things seems like a waste of time (though nothing has truly felt fun in years), self-care is a waste of time. The only times I strive for anything better is when I have someone directly in my life, like a romantic partner, pushing me to do those things. I worry I am broken and a complete fuck up. I worry that I am a waste of time, space, and energy, and I feel so so SO bad for the people in my life that have to put up with me. I feel like I'm disabled by how much I hate myself. I've had some unpleasant experiences in my life,, sure, but nothing that I feel would warrant me feeling so extremely about myself, it feels like I'm just broken and shouldn't have been born and given the opportunity to one day pass on my shitty genes. It seems like it would be better to kill myself. I've been on medications since I was 13 and nothing has ever made me feel content, I've stopped them all now and feel the same. I feel like I really am a hopeless case and that I shouldn't be here. I am miserable and I don't know how to fix it. I just want to be happy and to feel like I deserve the love people give me. I am as useful as a corpse.

i've been a lower weight than this before, yet somehow i can't break whatever mental barrier i have. any time it comes to food my body goes into autopilot. i open my eyes and the food is eaten. it's so embarrassing. i've even relapsed into bulimia before fixing this issue… controlling food intake is the only thing that keeps me balanced and i've lost control.

i'm not fat by any means but i want to apply myself for once and lose this weight so i can at least have a body that i would like, or to know that i have control over something in the world. i feel like i'm at my wit's end. i know it's up to me to fix it and have discipline but i'm searching for mental tricks or some fucking way to restrain myself. i just want to be pretty and live this new year differently..

i'm depressed, rotting in my room and a near college dropout. i just want this one thing for myself. it hurts.

Borderline personality disorder, or literal fucking demons in human form. I did not find a thread discussing this specifically but yell at me if there is one.

I'm the embodiment of every single negative stereotype of BPD (and bisexuality) and I have basically ruined my life. Idk if I should honestly just end it.

Is anyone else still hesitant about getting the COVID vaccine? My mom has scared me from getting vaccinated due to telling me about people who have died because of getting it and is strongly against it, but with all the shaming and guilting of non-vaccinated people, I feel like I'm starting to succumb to peer pressure.

I'm starting to get skeptical myself however, because it seems like pretty much everyone who has gotten the vaccine is still getting COVID and spreading it. They're still making us do online classes at uni, too. What the hell is the point then? The vaccine looks like it's not doing anything (Especially with these newer variants) and it seems they won't let us ever return to normal at this point, whether we get vaccinated or not. All I see is vaccine propaganda. Also I'm in the U.S., where Americans tend to act like pretty big sheeple hypochondriacs, despite their extremely shady and scammy healthcare system, so this is another reason why I'm skeptical.

hey girlies, I need to write about this because at this point I'm going BALLISTIC and INSANE over my boyfriends' dad. I need to know if I am giving a normal response and need advice. To help me out, I will green text it
>NYE, I am in London at the time with my family spending the night until the 1st

>My boyfriend decides to go to a public moshpit - he is into Carti bla bla rap (which isn't relevant)

>He really wants to go but to avoid the chance his parents disapproval over it, he lied to say he was going to mine

>Normal stuff you'd expect at a moshpit happened, he made some friends all studying medicine at universities
around and a little drinking, he starts to make his way back at 7ish

>The closest train station from his to mine is a 7 minute walk from mine, he walks back my way

>He realises his dad is waiting outside mine to probably walk back

>Boyfriend makes quick excuse saying that he went to the tescos to get food
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

i am the only one in my friend group without a boyfriend, some are already engaged, one is married, the others are in LTR's and seem really happy and i am happy for them. for the longest time i thought i was glad being alone as i am, took the pinkpill too early only reading stuff like Jane Eyre and the like, then growing up and realizing i am asexual which didn't help. i don't think guys (or girls for that matter) are attractive, but there has always been a side of me that yearned for a strictly platonic relationship, with nothing to do with sex, a shoujo-manga style relationship if you will, but soon enough, that side of me also realized it is a strictly fictional thing, (or a one in a thousand?) which made me give up, and i was happy giving up because it felt easier. for a while, it felt like a huge burden was taken off my shoulder, when i was able to say "im asexual" and it made sense. But recently, ive realized that hugging my cats to kill off touch starvation, and reading fanfiction like i used to when i was a middle-schooler "ain't it" anymore.
Whenever my friends are talking about their S/O, either in a positive or negative light, they seem so much cooler than me. not just in the sense "how do you do fellow kids"-cool, but just- relevant, got their life together, typical, safe, etc.. qualities none of which i have for my own.
and recently, it's gotten even more humiliating because they seem to like joking about this state of mine too, i can't stop thinking about that time i was talking to this one girl, and the conversation ended with me wishing her well on her upcoming marriage like "y'all are so cute together, i wish you well!" and she goes
>thank you anon, and i wish you and Aatrox well too :))
Which made me want to kill myself.
i still do tbh, it's just- the idea of getting in a relationship horrifies me to no ends, the committement, the "being the best version for yourself", the sappy cringe, but especially all the sexual stuff. But on the other hand, i feel dysfunctional and weird being the only one this way, and i wish i can stop feeling this way and love moids like everyone else and be normal in this sense

Last year or so I made a attempt to end my life and ended up in mental hospital
Got anti psychotics for 2 months straight and after I got out I was addicted to them
I gained about 8 kg
My boyfriend always told me how much he hates that I take them so I stopped cold turkey for him
One month later he told me while he was on ecasy how much he hates that I gained weight and that he also hates my skin eye and hair color
Developed bulimia and only managed to gain 2kg
I'm now a bit over 140lbs or so

I feel terrible almost everyday what do