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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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News: /cgl/ has been merged with /hb/.
Please read the rules! Last update: 01/18/2019


don't hate me Anonymous 8399[Reply]

why did I have to be raised by a single mother I'm such a pathetic piece of cowardly shit
20 posts and 5 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 8426

Society sucks.
My brother kept me alive.
I thought I was gay but it's not the solution

Anonymous 8427

I can't hate anyone.
women feel wicked when you're unwanted but everyone is just scared looking out for themselves

Anonymous 8430

Do you love your mom?

Anonymous 8455

At least the pain is over with, anon. Someone should've been there to protect you from all of that terror. I can only hope you can have someone to console you through this trauma.

Anonymous 8461

Stop blaming other people for your own shortcomings. Grow up.


Relationship attraction issues Anonymous 7040[Reply]

Okay guys I'm drunk enough to ask you some real questions since I wouldn't be able to ask them sober

I'm currently dating a really nice dude, nicer than other dudes or ladies I've encountered. Let's call him Robert. I've known him for half my life.

>feeling good

But then my attraction starting decreasing for Robert when I got reminded of a dude I had spoke to briefly in my class a year ago, let's call him Jason. He is smart and successful, but the dude I'm dating isn't really successful. He is hardworking but isn't bright. Thing is I don't know anything about Jason. I haven't spoke to Jason since class a year ago and we spoke minimally if anything hardly.

>start contemplating

Jason starts coming out in my recommended list on one social media application and I start thinking more about him. We are not friends. I start thinking, maybe I should add Jason and get to know him. On the other hand I have this wonderful nice dude I'm dating, it's just the overall physical attraction and brightness part is personally getting to me.

Advice? Should I just break it off with this nice dude if I feel this way? Work it out? Should I befriend Jason even if we weren't friends in person? Is that weird? I don't know what to do, the drink can only help so much guys
7 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 7061

I agree with you guys but I've already talked to him about it. I don't think the physical attraction can really change that much you know?

Anonymous 7065

It definitely can, but asking for someone to work on themselves is super super rude. I honestly think you should lay it out and end it. AVOID fighting and leave it on a good note as best you can.
Definitely agree with some other anons that you should also introspect and avoid jumping into a relationship so quickly with someone else.

Anonymous 7104

Yeah I should.I just find Jason attractive physically although not knowing anything about him truly

Anonymous 7133

>I'm currently dating a really nice dude, nicer than other dudes or ladies I've encountered.

Sounds like you should be platonic friends with him, if that's his standout quality.

>Thing is I don't know anything about Jason. I haven't spoke to Jason since class a year ago

You'd rather think about someone you met a year ago and don't know anything about than the person you're "dating". You are not attracted to this Robert guy at all. Like, AT ALL.

You should stop "dating" Robert and clear your head for a while. Figure out why you were trying to date someone you're not attracted to.

Anonymous 21418

This thread is 8 months old and inactive. Why do you keep bumping dead threads


Self Esteem Anonymous 21286[Reply]

How did you manage to build some up? I don't have any and it's wrecked every single relationship throughout my life. I don't want to live like this anymore

Saint 21332


Just take a moment to think, that you will die one day. You will be thinking of every moment you missed out on or regret everyday until you die.

From this day forward you should never regret anything you do. If you want something, go out and get it. If you hate yourself, go out and change it.

You control everything you do, so you might as well go and do everything you want, before its too late.

Anonymous 21352

Every day point out one positive thing that happened to yourself i.e. learnt something new, made it to an appointment on time.

Some days I even just remind myself I have yet to kill someone with my car which is a nice feeling.

Anonymous 21358


I started doing and achieving things I feel proud of. Advice like "just liek hav self esteem", "focus on the good things xd" are useless IMO, however well intentioned.

If you read a lot of books, say, Kafka's complete novels, you can say "hey, I knoe a lot about Kafka". If you ace a test, if you talk with a guy you like even for 10 seconds, if you make a painting, you can actually say " I made this", no self delusion.

In the end, thats what "esteeming" is about. Putting a value on things (yourself, in this case!)

Having enjoyable sex really helped my self esteem. Bad sex dd the opposite. Do you thing you can find a nice fellow, op?


Anonymous 1979[Reply]

I'm 99% sure my boyfriend is cheating on me.
I tried to talk about it and make him admit it, but he won't. I don't care about the high road anymore, I just want to plan a safe exit and get proof of his cheating. Please help me through this trying time sisters
36 posts and 5 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 2902


Great way to go Girl! I wish I could give you a high five. Fuck that loser man!

Anonymous 2905

You handled the situation so gracefully, good on you for coming out of a shitty situation with your head held high and dignity intact.

Anonymous 2914

Good on you for having such self control. I would have gotten so angry and screamed so many obscenities.

Anonymous 21333

The last post in this thread was a year ago anon

Anonymous 21336

This is the same person bumping a bunch of old threads


Anonymous 18187[Reply]

i met this guy on discord. he's like 25, and i'm 30. we became very close and i'd have these fantasies about actually meeting up with him. i know some girls who met their husbands online so why not? but then he started like mailing me gifts and things started to seem like they might actually happen, and i got cold feet. it's been literal years since i've dated anyone and my own life is kind of a mess i'm trying to fix right now, and driving like 12 hours to go see him seemed really scary. i sorta tried to get time off work to go see him but when my pto request was denied i didn't really push for it anymore.

then we really started to butt heads politically. he's a trump voter and i'm very much not. i'm sorta wondering if i kinda pushed things in that direction purposely or if it just kinda happened. i'm kinda obsessed with politics and like to share my opinions. idk.

anyway, i told him that now wasn't a good time and i need to work myself out before i can really consider dating anyone very seriously. he was upset but kind of okay with it. we kept talking though, as friends at first, but then things were kinda right back where they were with us being kinda seriously into each other. then he met another girl, irl.

now we don't talk very much, and when we do it's not the deep, meaningful communication that we used to have. i probably shouldn't feel this way, but i miss talking to him a lot. it doesn't help that i'm kind of a loser, and don't have much in the way of friends. right now i feel sort of hurt, and then like i shouldn't feel that way because it's my fault in the first place for pushing him away.

i really miss him, silly as it all sounds.
1 post omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 18268

thanks for pic related >>18187

and you're not silly, anon. allow yourself to feel sad for a while.

Anonymous 18362

Just keep talking to him and cuck her current girl.

Anonymous 18363

She is clearly just a rebound for him anyway, he must still want you deep inside because the only reason you didn't get further was because of outside reasons.

Anonymous 18365

Don't listen to this >>18362 whore's advice.

Anonymous 21334

Stop talking like a disgusting smegsie.


Why are they like this? Anonymous 16677[Reply]

>meet a cute guy, we get on well and he’s funny and kindhearted
>he seems like he’s interested, we start flirting at a party and things are looking promising
>next time we’re at a party I’m going at it, (“let’s share a seat”, lots of hugging eye contact etc)
>this time somethings wrong, he looks all conflicted and uncomfortable
>turns out one of his friends, who is in my lectures, likes me and he has promised not to “get in his way”
I never expressed any interest in that guy and made it clear to him but now it’s ruined forever just for some bullshit territorial boy friendship thing.
59 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 17026

>gross men

Anonymous 17029

You're probably not in an impoverished country where there is a real financial incentive to being in a rich guy's harem so you can afford basic necessities, the only motivation for engaging in polyamory in developed nations is sexual hedonism.

Anonymous 17030

We need to help these women so they don't need to resort to that

Anonymous 17061

If T invites K when he could hang out with just you alone, he's never going to make a move on you or he's going to reject you (he's been doing it for a while now girl, wake up)

Anonymous 17392

It kind of feels like you use what happened as an excuse for why you don't like K. Especially seeing as you didn't really like him prior to that either.


Anonymous 15342[Reply]

Is there such a thing as an attractive male virgin? I’d rather not have a bf who has been spoiled too much. However, I’d still like an attractive bf (like anyone else) and I’m afraid that any hot guy might’ve been a manwhore. Are there hot men who aren’t mentally ill who are still virgins? Particularly those who AREN’T that way because of religious reasons.
Or are all men sexual beasts who act on their constant urges?
106 posts and 12 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 18305

You can take my older brother. 25 years old. Don't know if he is attractive for CC though.

Anonymous 18307

By the way you talk I can tell you aren't attractive.

Anonymous 18311

My boyfriend was like you until we met, just the same way you met your ex but we were lucky enough to stick together and make it work.

Don't change, the one for you is out there somewhere, anon. people who say you're salty just don't know any better, they don't understand people like us. we were almost five years older than you so you may need to be patient, but i hope you don't change your values just because you're sad or tired of waiting. good luck!

Anonymous 18312

You're sweet, but I doubt it. I don't enjoy this. I just hope you're all more happy than I am sad.

Anonymous 18313

I didn't enjoy it either, it was really hard for both of us at the time. I wish you all the best and I hope you can be happy with your special someone someday, I know you can find the one.


College/Uni feels Anonymous 10[Reply]

Share the good, the bad, and hell of pursuing a degree. Whether it be living in a dorm with a horrible roommate, classes kicking your ass, or something happening relating to school that has filled you with joy.
178 posts and 41 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 21193


Do you ever study with someone else? I think it would be helpful (not for theory but for problems) but I don't have any friends and it's scary to just ask someone if we can study together.
I also like to draw on my notes when I get sick of studying, pic related it's me when I realize I will never be as smart as I wish.

Anonymous 21258

Rarely. I tend to get more done when I'm alone, but sometimes I wish I had a study friend that was working on something else for the company, or someone who was in my classes so we could work on problems together.
sorry those aren't my notes, I used to doodle on my notes, but now I like to keep doodles and notes separate

Anonymous 21283


I don't use notes. My handwriting sucks and I found that I never actually looked at my notes anyways so I end up just rereading the textbook or looking online. Probably is a poor method of studying but it works for me.

Anonymous 21288

If what you're doing works, that's fine, but research points towards analogue writing as a way to retain information. Not because you'll look at it again, but the act of writing it helps you remember.

Anonymous 21329

Yeah I usually also never reread my notes but it's so helpful to just write things down


Anonymous 19435[Reply]

> meet cute boy online
> get his telegramm
> text for over 3 months every fucking day
> today he said he actually want gay boyfriend
3 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 19449

>Hey <guy you like>, are you gay?
How do you see that ending well for you? Like at all?

Anonymous 19452

sounds like he led you on if it wasn't obvious. He might be bi and just decided he prefers guys. sucks for you anon, no harm in feeling like shit for a while but eventually try to move on and give things another shot with someone in the future.

Anonymous 19453

I'm not op, I just think asking a guy if he's gay is a recipe to destroy any chance you ever had with him.

Anonymous 19455

well op can still read that anyways i guess. and you might be surprised what some guys are willing to put up with if they like you enough.

Anonymous 19457

I call my guy friends "faggot" all the time and they'll laugh it off or deny it. I imagine if you called an actual gay dude that he'll either get offended or roll with it.


Anonymous 21275[Reply]

I haven't really made any new friends since I left high school. Well, that's not exactly true, but I haven't made any friends that I hang out with outside of class really.

It's been three years since I graduated. I don't know what's wrong with me. I used to have friends I did things with regularly.

Does anyone else have this problem? Am I just a schizoid?

Anonymous 21277



But are you in college at-least? or are you still in hometown, college offers plenty of opportunities to make friends. However staying in hometown and working is more lonely since

1) most people your age are not there
2) the few people who are, are busy with work

I think it's in agreement that highschool is the time where you make the most amount of friends, not necessarily those bonds being deep though

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