> It's gut wrenching and the 'what ifs' can potentially ruin your future relationships.
Yes. Spot on. Omg. You literally described what I feel. The ‘what ifs’. He wanted us to meet up to properly talk about everything yet, he was screaming on the phone and I thought it wouldn’t be wise to meet him at that moment as it was already late night also. And for some moments, I used to wonder, what if I met him that night? What if I didn’t talk to his friend?
> He would be so passive aggresive and throw shade at everyone including myself.
Also, he was passive aggressive too! I wasn’t comfortable with how fast everything was moving so I would bring a friend along (I informed him beforehand) and he would always find ways to degrade me and make me felt left out and blame it on me for asking her to come along. Me, him and that friend, we also had a group chat. Now, it’s just him and her. Too bad, that new friend of his is apart of my close group of friends. So my friendship with her is also ruined. She spurted some hurtful stuff, something along the lines to learn having less emotions and to move on, which was awfully toxic. She likes him, that’s clear. It’s just the people around me expect me to mend stuff with her, just because we were a part of the same circle and I find that invalidating. They want me to reach out first to her, the one who clearly invalidated my whole experience, when it’s clear what kind of person she is now. It made me feel like I was overreacting when I don’t think I did anything of such.
I guess, the only thing holding me back is the lack of acknowledgement from the people because he treated me so badly and I don’t get why people expect me to just shut it up and be okay with it.
He called me crazy and that I was just making everything up because of the guilt of talking to that close friend of his. It also didn’t help that I fought with my friend, just because of him.
Thank you for being so validating :(. I guess, till they’re served by life with those kind of people, they will never understand.