/feels/ - Advice & Venting

>>47531
cringe edge

I just learned that he was a wife-beater and raped an underage girl. RIP in peace.

>>47534
>>47532
Sorry I can't hear your samefag over the sound of me celebrating the death of a drug addicted commie.

>>47531
>drug-addicted commie
>He supported the establishment of an independent Palestinian state and condemned Israel's military strikes on Gaza during the 2014 Israel–Gaza conflict, saying: "What Israel is doing to the Palestinians is shameful."
wtf was his end game?

Not even among the top 5 of all time.

Pelé was better. Indeed, even Di Stefano was better.

if i am not mistaken i think i have an identity crisis

(sigh)

every time i try to fulfill my duty as a girlfriend or tradwife i run into strange emotional/psychological blocks to the point where i don't know how to cope with it

it is like i need to improve my life because i am slowly dying on the inside, but it's like i am too scarred and rigid from the horrors of life or something deep

>>48799
i have not analyzed myself in this way, and i am a bit older than i used to be.

i was watching a video entitled like, "how to improve your femininity" with a girl with blonde hair and perfect virtuous character and whatnot. am i doing it wrong? it seems whenever i take on the concept of femininity it seems like i am doing something wrong, but it unfortunately seems like a necessary thing i must do and overcome if i am to be happy with myself….this sort of late stage learning or late stage identity crisis

>>48801
>>48803
I know this is cliché but why not just be yourself and do what comes naturally instead of trying to be a type of person?

>>48805
yes, ty. i suppose this is not a bad idea to try. as long as i am not hurting others, perhaps i am too inundated with what society is selling to my small mind

>>48809
It’s ok to look at other lifestyles to help you decide what you like and to try things for a while but don’t feel that you have to copy a lifestyle 100%.

Join online group chats, discords, forums on thing you like/do on a regular basis. Write down thing you like and don't like. Write down what you believe in and what you want to see in society. Take care of your mental and physical body by acceptance and being nice to yourself. Treat yourself. Know that you are beautiful being yourself.

>>46972
Be your own favourite person anon.

>>46973
>>48166
>>48376
I returned after a month, and I nearly cried seeing this post after getting diagnosed with bipolar and getting some treatment and meds. I wouldn't wish what the degree of depersonalisation I was going through at this time to my worst enemy.

Thank u fellow anons for ur kind words and advice.

>>48743
So glad you're on your way to feeling better. Good for you taking care of yourself. DBT is all about "making a life worth living".

>>48744
that chinchilla is really cutie

>>48678
how old are you?

>>48670
sounds dope

>>48681
also exmuslim here anon, drop your discord if you ever want to talk

for the past two years now i feel extra lonely during the holiday seasons, specifically starting november/thanksgiving time.

i do have family to be around and celebrate with but it’s the same thing every year… and i just want to bring a significant other to my holiday festivities or even just mention that im dating someone. i feel so lame and lonely because so many other people in my family have brought over their boyfriends/girlfriends to meet and celebrate with for the holidays and i still haven’t.
i always start thinking about what ifs during this season, like what if i was dating someone and how fun it would be to spend this time with them.

i dunno. it sucks.

>>48697
I relate to this feeling anon, you're definitely not gonna be the only one who's single for the holidays.

>>48355
Being awkward is manageable because many guys will think you're just shy. I hate to be the on breaking it, but being ugly is the main problem here.

>>48317
Yeah, you should have tried being funny and interesting instead. Any goofball can crack a smile.

>>48359
We both know that men are shallow and will probably think
>she is only being nice and funny because she has to as ugly
Why are people like this…

>>48361
You're putting too much stock in your ability to predict what people think.
I'm sure whenever some boy was nice to you, your first instinct wasn't to attribute some ulterior motive to their actions.

>>48361
If you're funny and interesting then you become more attractive.

>>44283
>>44264
>>44229
You never know whats true or false in an imageboard just saying. So personally I don't believe it. I think OP was wiser and cut the crap, the post is more than 4 months old ffs.

>>44218
Pics or didn't happen.

any updates anon?

>>48190
hell fucking yeah
he reached out to me and was like I kinda want to date but take it slow so now were dating again and have been for 4 months and everything is going great. We have much better communication this time around and I am a lot calmer with him.

sorry to keep this thread alive. I hope it dies out now that things are going great between us. Thanks for reading my rants and post :)

Okay I’m pretty pissed. I wrote a reply to this thread before but for some fucking reason my reply got deleted (and for no fucking reason)
So I’ll post it again:
Congratulations hurray for you, go screw your brains out because you got your ex back, not so many of us are lucky to have something like that happen, so congratulations

>>12529
2 years later and still makes me cry. Having to regret not married with the love of my life would make me miserable. I hope you are better and loved by a good person wherever you are now, anon.

AK,

It's been years, and I still haven't forgiven you for abandoning me. You backstabbed me, called me a slut/whore, and never once bothered to see things from my perspective. Your "boyfriend" took advantage of an underage, traumatized me and you took HIS side? And you wondered why I was so passive aggressive to you? I didn't even know he was taken. I wasn't even the only teen he went after. Why the obsession with me all that time? You're really that insecure that you played pick-me with a predator. Great.
I hate you more than words can describe. To be honest I was happy he got obsessed with me because I knew it would cause you pain. It almost makes his stalking, his creepiness towards me, all the worth.
If it wasn't for you he'd be behind bars. To this day I get messages from him, in my twenties. It's no longer worth it. I want this all to be over. I want to forget any of this ever happened to me.
I hate you so much. I'll never forgive you for leaving me when I needed you and letting him do
as he pleased.

JY,

Does your current "lefty" friend group know that you forced me to be your girlfriend and forced yourself on me multiple times or is that a touchy subject? I'd love to know.

DR,

Stop stalking my blog. And do something about that drinking problem and mommy complex of yours.
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

Dear J,
It has been over a year and a half since you left me and it's still on my mind but I don't miss you. I know I apologized over the shit I said to you but I still despise you. I don't know where you are in life or what you're up to but I hope you don't leave somebody else while they're in the middle of a crisis like you did to me a while ago. You saw my mental health decline and thought that it was best to just leave me all by myself knowing that my family disliked me and that the only friend I had outside the relationship had moved over 2000 miles away a year prior to the breakup. I had nobody and of course I was having a psychotic episode so my behavior pushed others that didn't know me that well far away. Also, fuck you for trying to get my ONLY friend to turn against me all because I called you fat and a pussy. It was wrong to name call but I wasn't even myself and you still made me out to be the worst fucking human being on earth. You refused to bring up how you gaslighted me all the time and neglected everything while I bent over backwards and walked on eggshells over fear that you would either leave me or be horrifically offended over something I said to you if it had to do with your weight or your OCD. I tried to get you help with those issued and you just refused all of it. I did so much and you just ignored it and when I needed your help you were NOWHERE to be seen. You constantly shamed me for having behaviors related to my ADHD and being on the spectrum yet if I brought up any slight issues with your problems it was highly offensive. The entire relationship I was under the guise that it was so healthy when really we were both bad for each other and you also made my insecurities worse than they already were. I'm glad I'm with the guy I'm with now. We build each other up and it's been over 6 months together and there hasn't been any terrible arguments unlike my past relationship with you. We started fighting 3 months in and yet we were together for a year and a half. You're such a fucking hypocrite and a fucking pervert who forces sexual acts on people and then plays the victim when the other party isn't interested. You're so lucky I haven't told everybody in your social group how you've tried to force oral sex on me or when you constantly felt me up in inappropriate places even after I told you not to. I try not to wish the worst for you because I'm trying to be a better person but I do. I can't believe I wasted so much time on you anPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

dear z

the only reason i'm responding to you crawling back to me is because i have a modicum of extra time and energy right now.

i'm prepared for you to leave at any moment. for you to turn on me at any moment. you've shown it in your actions. i don't really care if you're "only like this" because you "love" me so much. fuck you. so it's cool if you hit me, hurt me? it's cool that you come anonymously into my spaces, say horrible things, and then apologize saying that it's coz you love me? i'm never erasing what you've said to me. i want to never forget how quickly you can turn on someone you claim to love, and how quickly you are to ask forgiveness because of your own guilt, not because you want to change. what right do you have to cause others so much worry and grief, and then shittily block any method to contact you?

you could've been a part of this life. not sorry, honestly i know you're only talking to me because your other fixation didn't work out. i hope i'm wrong, i'd rather be wrong. i'm in a shit mood today remembering what you did. i don't know why you felt compelled to treat me like that. i've been an asshole but not to the people i cared about. things could have been good.

l

there's this older lady at work who's been a HUGE bitch to everybody and to me specifically (withheld money i was owed, even tried to get me fired at some point; it's gotten a lot more peaceful between us lately, if only because we're working from home and i don't have many reasons to interact with her)
she lost her husband recently, she never told us but we learned about it through someone who lives close by her
i really want to offer her my condolences and write her that we feel for her even if we daren't bring it up since she never told us, but i'm afraid it'll just piss her off

I'm sorry to hear that anon. Hugs.

Same: both my father and stepfather. I used to be terrified of every “manly” man as a young girl and I like to think I’d grow out of if by now but nah. So can’t help with the problem but you’re not alone.

>>47008
>>47008
tell me about it pls

>>47888
He recently died, so I have nothing to say anymore. It seems like all my resentments and feelings towards him have been shoved into a dusty old drawer and locked away for good. I still can't believe he's gone.

Next time he threatens you, come at him with a knife. What do you have to lose? My mom only stopped beating me when I beat the shit out of her. Instill fear into everyone around you.

>>48613
go for it. you can always learn something new. if you're bad at knowing warning signs for your depression, a loving partner can help as well. i found my long-term partner when we were both depressed and we slowly healed each other.

>>48614
So it can be fun to dump your emotional baggage on someone?

My sexuality confuses me which is why I don't date anymore. I never wanna have sex or do romantic things with my boyfriends. I never feel butterflies, etc. Maybe it's just that I'm not a visual person, but I'm not sexually attracted to men AT ALL physically. You could show me a bunch of "hot" guys naked, and I won't be attracted to any of them, and I couldn't even choose which one is the most "attractive" of the bunch. It's like looking at an object, just meh… neutral

I have no desires to be sexual or romantic (i.e kissing, hugging, etc) with boyfriends.

However, I do with fictional people and shit that I daydream about it. Though, it's more so the psychological aspect (and I have to do this whole maladapative daydeam scenario that takes like 4 hours to develop, lmao) is it just me being picky???

In porn, on the rare occasions that I watch it, I only watch PoV focusing on the female, but I don't know if I'm even attracted to women either… Am I asexual, if so, why do I masturbate to fictional characters and shit?

>>48615
not what i said in my post at all. people can't just heal on their own, they need social support of loved ones. but you need to put in effort yourself and make sure it's a balanced relationship, otherwise it turns unhealthy and toxic.

>>48626
I do this too, anon!

Honestly, I think fictional men drastically outperform real men, they're more appealing to us because they embody what the real thing lacks: honesty and vunerability.

I don't really have any advice for you, sadly. But it's nice to be able to relate!

>>48466
Literally the worst reason to cheat. How are you this dickmatized to want to try to "get over" this??? There's no getting over something because "boredom". That's just the worst. I would be living in constant fear and anxiety that my partner wouldn't be entertained enough by me to not cheat. That's a horrible life. Why would you want to relegate yourself to living through that constantly when you could just not?

>>48464
First reply best reply.

You can never get over a partner cheating on you unless you are a literal cuck.

>>48523
Also prepare for him to do it again in the future if you actually decide to stay anyway. He is gonna find excuses easily given he did it this time just because he was bored.

>>48464
this. Cheat on him back and just dump him lol.

>>48463
If you're willing to give your relationship and him another then just go to a couple's therapist. You won't get proper advice from the femcels here. Also, personally, I think you should talk this out with him, address your concerns and worries. As ironic as it might seem in your situation, communication is key to having a better, healthy relationship.
And don't forget the therapist. It does wonders.