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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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Please read the rules! Last update: 04/27/2021

1724880397036291 1…

Should I be concerned? Anonymous 116826[Reply]

My boyfriend who I'll be moving to soon and I had a conversation. I asked if the money he is going to make is going to be enough, and he said yes. I said it would be better if I work too, and not be a leech plus the money I'd bring in would be nice and he passionately refused insisting I wouldn't need to work.
I'll say that I like the idea of being a stay at home mom and stuff, but being completely financially reliant on him is… restricting?
Is this what people call a red flag?
I have to say that he is a wonderful person whom I woud do anything for and I love him very much but every once in a while I think about this conversation.
5 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 116872

>>116826
Insisting is one thing, but forcing you to stay at home and not work? Is a HUGE red flag. It will lead to financial abuse. There is a good chance he wants you to be financially dependant on him so he can easily manipulate you. Do NOT stay at home. If he forces you to, leave.

Anonymous 116873

>>116826
Also how are you going to save money if you can't work? You need to save money for yourself regardless of whether you're relying on him or not

Anonymous 117002

Girl please don't do this. It's called being a house slave. You're literally Dobby.

Anonymous 130193

>>116826
Op here, noone cares but I have updates. I broke up with him over half a year ago because he just didn't actually love me (he was also schizophrenic, autistic and had ocd) and some other things that made me disgusted by him. Also, when on vacation I saved him from drowing after asking if he can swim and he insisted he can lol. And I had to ask for forgiveness while crying because I said that I didn't like what he did.
And he also said he'd kill himself if I didn't continue talking to him early in our relationship.
Delusional is what I was. But now I have a boyfriend who loves me for who am I and actually supports me in every way possible and finds me attractive unlike my ex. And he's better in every way.

Anonymous 130195

>>130194
Hey I didn't actually think anyone would answer, and thank you. It means a lot.
He was always like that. Typlical men. He once drunkenly played guitar for me. It was simply awful. And when I said it was meh, he got offended.
(He hadn't touched that guitar in years up until that point)
Also might use this thread to dump things that bothered me because sometimes I feel mad at how he treated me and whatnot.
Also found the threads he made at 4ch*n. He really is good at making himself look like an emotional boy who hadn't done nothing wrong. I guess that is what he always was.
But I am proud to say that I actually haven't cried about him since early september!



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Unpopular Opinions Anonymous 129936[Reply]

Share any unpopular opinions you hold here.
16 posts and 4 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 130117

>>130116
this isn't an unpopular opinion ngl, especially not on here or any women centric site. not necessarily disagreeing tho

Anonymous 130119

>>130057
What even is this definition? Fruits and veggies are not strict distinctions, so I consider anything that's fruity and worthy on a salad plate as fruit. Else relegated to the veggie-sphere.

Anonymous 130121

1000_F_268948389_J…

>>130056
>>130024
Man therapy highly depends on what exactly ails you, and differs wildly from person to person, what their environment is, how do they think through stuff etc. Most therapists treat it like a doctor would - read from a book on how to treat it, follow the instructions, ignore the patient's direct response etc. In practice it's more like bending a piece of wood, you gotta know how flexible it is in the first place. A therapist has no idea what you've been through. That outsider perspective should be complemented with proper guidance but most therapists don't do that.

Anonymous 130122

>>130121
Yeah except most doctors aren't in a field with a replication crisis and dubious scientific efficacy.

Anonymous 130155

Asians womens (and mens) looks are overrated



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Anonymous 130046[Reply]

Why should I have to settle for an ugly man just because I'm an ugly woman? I hate ugly men.

Men can impregnate multiple women at once so all women should just be able to share the few actual good looking men.
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 130118

gettyimages-117150…

>>130061
That's how gorillas do - they share parenting among their troop with females and even the male silverback helps. Gorillas are one of the more involved male parents in nature.

Anonymous 130120

You're probably not ugly. Society gives women self esteem problems, while most men look like naked mole rats by age 30 because they refuse to do a single hair treatment. don't settle.

Anonymous 130132

>>130060
It absolutely matters that they're beautiful becaues of the mountains of abuse they dole out. Even if I'm average, and don't wear make-up I'd rather be single than with an unpredictable man whom god knows how they're going to turn out, what they're going to do, unless I at least FEEL SOMETHING. Going with uggos feels like getting scammed twice by moids whom are imfamous for their violence, and sex abuse.

Anonymous 130133

>>130118
Yeah well I'm not looking a bara gorilla men no matter how you try to psyop it to us moid

Anonymous 130134

>>130132
It literally doesn't matter if I'm plain. The fact is I feel repulsed my men less if they're very attractive. Most of the time yeah I'm just not going to bother at all.



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Poly & "ethically nonmonogomous" people in dating Anonymous 130104[Reply]

I'm dating in the city, and I've noticed that poly people will just not leave me the fuck alone. It doesn't really matter how clear and polite I make it that I'm not interested in being with multiple people, these people will continue to push you, prod you, try to get you drunk to sleep with you or worse fucking lie to you about it for a long time. It's not even just men, a lot of the times its women, especially bi women pimping themselves out for their boyfriends, even lesbians. These people will make a big stink about how what they're doing is the most humane, down to earth, ethical way to fuck someone even while actively pushing your boundaries, even after straight up hiding this from you to take advantage of you. At this point I'm pretty sure some of them just have a fetish for coercing people into this shit.

I had someone reveal this while fucking me after talking to me for weeks, and I've reached a total breaking point.

This might be too much of a Brooklyn problem, but if you're in any major liberal city I'm sure you could throw a stone and hit any of these creeps. Anyone have any idea wtf is wrong with these people? How do I get them to leave me the fuck alone and go fuck each other instead?

Anonymous 130105

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Anonymous 130106

>>130105
This answer feels really profound, but I'm feeling like the second scientist unable to totally understand it. Nonetheless thank you.

Anonymous 130109

>>130105
Even the birds know city girls are no good. Nature is healing

Anonymous 130113

>>130109
I've encountered these freaks are in the suburbs too. no need to feel so special, sadly.

Anonymous 130115

This is a big simplification but I think it’s natural to reduce people to sex objects when you’re poly. It’s impossible to get invested into so many people at once and usually poly relationships develop pretty quick, worse yet, you’re becoming a sexual object for multiple other people at once. Hell, if monogamous relationships were designed to take care of your offspring long term, what are the modern poly relationships designed for then?

I’m having a hard time explaining this, but I hope the general idea is there.



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Anonymous 130107[Reply]

I'm not sure if my boyfriend cheated on me or not. He tried to meet up with his ex but he hasn't. Didn't? I'm not sure. Everytime I try to talk about it he seems to sigh a little, maybe it's out of shame. I love him so much. He told me he wanted to stay. I'm letting us stay together, but I'm so nervous. I want to trust him again. I'm tired of being a paranoid schizophrenic about this. I love him so much. I don't wanna get hurt again. This is a horrible, no good, bad thing, isn't it? He held me and panicked a whole night with me about it. Oh, geez. Geez, geez, geez.

Anonymous 130108

>He tried to meet up with his ex but he hasn't. Didn't? I'm not sure.
I mean do you have any evidence that he did?

Anonymous 130110

>>130107
If he's thinking about his ex enough to try and meet up, he's 100% thinking about fucking her. I'm not saying you should break up with him but if I were you I would assuming what you're saying is true and he did try to meet up with her. No guy is meeting up with his ex to just talk unless they have kids together or he's trying to fuck.

Anonymous 130111

>>130110
Not defending a moid but how do we know he's thinking about her?? OP what is making you fixate on his ex? It might be healthier to let this relationship go either way if its bringing you so much turmoil.

Anonymous 130112

>>130111
Based on what OP has said I assume he tried to arrange a meetup which means he was thinking about her. Maybe she tried to meetup with him and he agreed before deciding not to. In either case it seems like he intended to cheat

Anonymous 130114

>>130112
Couldn't tell if she just thought he did or something from the "but he hasn't. Didn't?" but maybe i'm just special needs.

>I'm letting us stay together,

I mean, you're not going to listen to us, but just leave. moids are plentiful and most are low quality.



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/lg/ - lesbian general Anonymous 108545[Reply]

felt like this should be a thread tbh
what's everyone up to? i'm thinking of downloading tinder again
190 posts and 47 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 130021

image_2026-04-25_1…

do any of u nonas wanna date ? im 18 yrs and i'll drop my disc. i promise to be good to you

Anonymous 130022

>>130021
Looking for somebody to date on an image board. That's when you know you've hit rock bottom

Anonymous 130023

>>130022
i have. what about it

Anonymous 130027

>>130021
i'm 18 too but happy being single.
although, if you're fine with being email friends that sounds lovely!

Anonymous 130058

>>108559
>femme-leaning
As are most lesbians I know.
You want a girl, not a girl disguised as a boy.
Girls who want that are mostly just disgruntled heteros.



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Anonymous 129990[Reply]

my groomer is a popular artist in a fandom space i'm in. i've tried to escape him so many times but he keeps somehow being interested in the same shit as me, posting his art, and then getting popular. it drives me insane and the one time i tried to tell people who he was (because i noticed he was following a lot of teenagers ) it did practically nothing. in fact, many people were defending him: "i don't understand people who now are all up in arms that ____ is a groomer…" and trying to get into contact with him. this specific person ended up seeing a repost about what he did with all the proof and made fanart for him, also found his contact information to message him. someone in the comments tried to tell her that he was a terrible person but she knew and didn't care, i wish i didn't feel so sensitive about this but i get SO upset seeing this happen.

i've seen at least three people find out what he did and then mention WANTING to contact him after finding out, or just being blasé about it. i've tried just blocking and leaving whatever fandom but i'm not going to let myself be pushed out of my own interests because of some asshole. i just figured nowadays people would have more empathy, but i don't have many friends besides from two who believed me about it, all the rest of my friends were also my groomers friends who chose him over me. at some point his ex girlfriend contacted me and told me she tried to report him to the police so they could get a warrant to search his device or whatever, but i never ended up hearing from her again about that.

i'm not sure what to do, ppl aren't listening to what happened anyways. i just wish i could live my life and ignore him but he's everywhere. i rlly needed to vent about this but advice would be nice too, i thought i had moved on completely from him but seeing this stuff still bothers me.

Anonymous 129991

Kill him

Anonymous 130007

>>129990
you need to visit different spaces that is new for you, something you didn't try before. Popular guy having defenders isn't uncommon, they rely on him for their niche 'crack'. He'll have his comeuppance

Anonymous 130010

Had a somewhat similar thing happen to me. The only thing that helped me mentally was unfortunately giving up our similar interests, since we were both chronically online so I decided to get into outdoor extroverted hobbies. Or enjoy what you both like but offline or in a different space. I still like some of the video games/movies he liked but now I'm on different social medias for them that he isn't on, and I try to get my other friends into them so I have people to talk to that I know aren't associated with my abuser



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Anonymous 129954[Reply]

Do you guys think it's weird and gross that for a woman, sex is about the guy dumping a load into your body?
I don't understand why more women don't think it's weird and gross. Like it's fully accepted that it's normal. Imagine spitting in somebody's mouth or peeing into their mouth. GROSS!!
6 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 129963

>>129957
Other ways to have sex?
>penis in mouth
>penis in the pooper
Sounds equally disgusting.

Anonymous 129964

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Anonymous 129965

>>129963
Lesbians

Anonymous 130006

Think of it more like a blood transfusion. You're draining him of his life essence.

Anonymous ## Cleanup crew 130053

Moved to >>>/nsfw/15807.



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Long Distance Relationships Anonymous 44204[Reply]

Thread to discuss Long Distance Relationships. The struggles, the pros… meeting the person for the first time… meeting them for the 50th time… vent both sad and happy things. LDRs can be quite a challenge but it's the right thing for some people.
425 posts and 59 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 119168

my gf and i have been long distance for a bit over 3 years now. im getting frustrated because every time i ask what our long term goals will be i get a vague non answer ("well when i graduate…" etc)

thankfully both of us have the income to afford multiple trips a year to see eachother but it's definitely affecting my life since i feel like all the time in between visits is just like… the void. like im standing around in an elevator waiting to get to the next floor. i almost feel like i'm wasting my life on this but that's hard to admit.

i want to make it work and i feel like we can but man this is so taxing. at least its gone better than my last LDR where the first time we met up she immediately dumped me and we had to spend the rest of the trip awkwardly being friends only lmao.

Anonymous 121925

I see my post about him from a long time ago was deleted. Much to think about.

Anonymous 127271

I know this thread is pretty dead but has anyone gone through the CR1 process without a lawyer? I'm worried my fiance is about to piss away thousands on something we can file for ourselves.

Anonymous 127299

>>127271
post on reddit maybe?

Anonymous 130271

You didn't have to bring them back. Hashtagfail for me but I know they lurk so I can't say which but don't listen to some of these.



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Anonymous 129918[Reply]

>They like it when you're available for them or talk about things that personally interest them
>They like it when you make an effort
>They like it when you try to make it special for them
>They like it when you bring energy, passion, enthusiasm, effort, etc

But…

>They aren't interested in you

>They don't even like being with you
>They get bored and find other people who they like more than you
> They don't bring any energy, passion, enthusiasm, effort, they just don't care unless it's about them

Why does dating often feel like being an entertainer for other people?

Anonymous 129970

Have you thought about being more interesting?

Anonymous 129986

>>129918
Relationships are tough. Frankly people need to realize functional and healthy relationships are the exception and not the norm. You need to find somebody who you can not only tolerate being around but who is actively interested in things you're interested in. Not only that but they need to be attractive enough that you don't wince every time you look at them. They also need to know or at least be willing to learn how to fuck properly. They also need to be responsible in their daily lives and supportive when things are difficult. There's a metric fuck ton of stuff that can go wrong here so it's really unsurprising so many people these days view casual sex as the better alternative. Without cultural norms, laws, and religion keeping people in relationships, there's almost no reason to be in one unless you've literally found your super special unicorn soulmate which is incredibly unlikely.

Anonymous 129987

>>129986
>Without cultural norms, and religion
If this is what holds together relationship for you why do you bother? It sounds like willingly sticking your arm in acid.

Anonymous 129988

>>129987
We collectively bother as a society because these relationships lead to families and those families are the backbone of a nation.

Anonymous 130000

If they have other options, of course they won't commit. The male mating strategy is to spread their sperm.



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