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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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Please read the rules! Last update: 04/27/2021

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frustrated Anonymous 126270[Reply]

maybe i'm in the wrong here but my female friends who have boyfriends just make me so incredibly angry.
they just make me so frustrated because they'll say things like 'oh i hate men' and then turn around and tolerate their useless male partners because somehow they are the exception. (???) i dont understand it.
every heterosexual relationship i've ever witnessed in my life is a genuine fucking horror story!!!!
i dont know. i just hate that my friends willingly give their lives to retarded insecure men who genuinely dont care about them at all. like wake up!
sorry i just had to get that off my chest hahaha
21 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126456

>>126445
You aren't supposed to drink your own kool-aid.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drinking_the_Kool-Aid
See this post >>126453 she could be having a bf right now.

Anonymous 126462

>>126456
> she could be having a bf right now.
Idk what u think u know about me but I do not have one and would never wish to have one lol

Anonymous 126463

>>126462
Cool, now stop making everything about yourself, i was only using you as example.

Anonymous 126464

>>126463
> i was only using you as example.
Which is exactly why I said something abt it dumbass lmfao so sorry I'm apparently making everything about myself

Besides there was literally nothing wrong w/ what the other anon said so idk what ur issue is

Anonymous 126624

>>126623
imagine being this new



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Anonymous 126610[Reply]

I've never had a single friend in my entire life and I fully intend to keep it that way for the rest of my life. There are no friends in this world. All relationships form the way that they do based on power dynamics. All relationships are purely transactional. Anyone who you think is your friend will turn on you in a heartbeat once you are no longer of use to them. Love doesn't exist and never has.

There is no such thing as good people. All human beings are profoundly rotten to the core.

The sooner you learn this, the better.
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126613

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The more you have, the more that people want from you. The more you burn away, the more that people earn from you. The more you pull away, the more that they depend on you.

Anonymous 126617

You are what you eat or sometihng

Anonymous 126619

>>126610
>Anyone who you think is your friend will turn on you in a heartbeat once you are no longer of use to them. Love doesn't exist
Who hurt you?

Anonymous 126620

Love is real. That's why it hurts so much when you're not loved.
One of my parents loves me, but I found that the other doesn't. Hurts.

Anonymous 126621

>>126620
Real.
I've been loved by complete strangers, little acts of kindness and gentle compassion none of my family has ever given me. Love is gentle, it is soft but it is disciplined, and I think the worst part about love aside for not being loved is when you have to purposely part ways with something you love for both your sake and theirs, knowing they will never understand why you did so until they get better, something that may never happen.



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meeting internet boyfriend Anonymous 125231[Reply]

hi nonas,

have any of you met a moid from the internet before? i have been talking to a guy for a few months now and we are considering meeting. i have never had a relationship before so i'm nervous about what things will be like in person.. i don't know what to expect.

i have a tendency to self-sabotage and i worry that i am going to cut off this one chance i have at a relationship because i'm scared of what's unknown to me.. can anyone share advice?

thank you anyone who leaves a comment, i wish i had some friends i could talk to about this..
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 125235

> hi nonas,
Kek, the surviving 1/3 of genuine posts ever posted in this site are trannies, aren’t they?

Anonymous 125265

Yes, when I was 13 I met a moid from discord. I got my virginity stolen from me that day.
met another last year, we got high, and again, in my weakened state, had sex.
met one last week and yet again, it was a hookup.

it made my self esteem plummet and reminder that I am a whore. I don't want to be a whore, I just crave physical intimacy, not even sex, just cuddles or kisses. don't meet up with moids from the internet. but if you do, make sure you trust him and its in a public place.

Anonymous 125266

>>125233
I really want to meet up with an anon moid, hes from Norway and is really sweet. I'm pretty against e dating, but my city is shit and I hate all the guys here. I've met up with 3 different guys from the internet and it all lead to us having sex.
I'm fine with sex, I just don't want it to be dominantly that. hopefully a true relationship.

Anonymous 126423

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>>125231

i met my bf when we were 15 on a Discord server. i was very socially inept and depressed and i hated talking to most moids but he was always very kind to me and never made me uncomfortable, always comforted me, never expected anything. one time i got fucked up and really drunk and confessed that i liked him in call, and eventually we started dating.

we were kind of on and off dating when we were younger because we were dumb and stupid. now i'm 22 and graduating nursing school and we're getting married next year and i'm moving in with him. i'm still bad with social stuff and i don't have any friends but he has always been there for me and i'm thankful.

keep looking nona God has a plan for you and he will bring you a wonderful man soon. he will make your life easier and shelter you from all the evilness in the world.

Anonymous 126604

>>126423
im genuinely tearing up reading this. that sounds so sweet i hope your life gets better with him :)



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Just one more year. What should I do? Anonymous 126476[Reply]

I'm stuck in a weird position.
When I newly turned 17, I met with a 30 year old guy from 4chan because I was lonely and wanted a friend. We had some common interests in games. We hung out at the arcade and in the same year, I went to his house to play co-op. However, the friendship was short lived as he asked me to be his girlfriend right after. I was young and stupid, I saw no issue with him. He was unfit and never had a girlfriend before, I never had a boyfriend before. So I thought I should give him a chance.
It's been 1 and a 1/2 years now. Due to feeling unsafe at home, as soon as I turned 18, I moved out to this dude's house. He said he'd support me. So I moved and enrolled to a highschool near his house.
Over time, living with him, I began to pick up on things that do not sit right with me.
Firstly, he has figurines of some anime girls that troubled me from the very first time I came over, but I thought I should just overlook it. Figurines of miku, vtubers and Fate characters. He has plushes of vtubers, his profile picture is a vtuber. He admits that he likes vtubers but doesn't watch them anymore. Yet when I criticise them for milking money from men he opposed me.
Things that disgust me include him loving the anime 'yuru yuri' a show common among lolicons, loving the soundtrack of 'yuru yuri', he downloaded all of them and calling the government 'woke' because the age for marriage is 18. Other than this, I told him I do not use twitter, but everyday, I check what he has posted and who he recently follows. When I checked his following for the first time, I burst into tears. It was anime porn artist after anime porn artists. Most of his following was that. Yet checking his recently followed, he still actively interacts with these anime porn artists. When he shows me something on twitter, he's very wary and cautious of ever scrolling too much, and when he accidently does - it's all vtubers and ecchi drawings of anime girls. Last night, I checked his following again, and I cried again discovering he followed 20 more disgusting anime artists.
The worst thing is, these anime porn artists also draw porn of underage characters… in other words loli. It's a trend I've noticed across the artists he indulges in.
I feel so stupid, I was too young and dumb to notice this before I lived with him. And now I'm stuck with this borderline pedophile. I should've picked it up when I told him my real age and he said "15 is legal anPost too long. Click here to view the full text.
15 posts and 4 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126560

>>126555
Honestly, I'm inclined to take that back.
Like the part about making weird implications, I'm sure you'll make a great doctor, using a moment of weakness against you was really mean of me, I'm sorry about that. I still think you shouldn't kill him ofc, you're right to think about your future.
But you're basically still a child with your whole life ahead of you and being with a pedo is definitely dangerous for you, get out of there

Anonymous 126563

leave him, listen to your intuition. he’s a pedo gooner. take photos and screenshots of all of his degeneracy and send it to his family. does him mom know about this or does she just enable it? also, see if there are any women’s shelters near you. can you get him to give you money, like lie and say it’s for like cosplay lingerie or something?

Anonymous 126586

>>126560
>>126560
i was going to yell at you but i was too tired. i’m not her but thank you for apologizing to her.

Anonymous 126600

>>126586
Yeah, I tried to delete the post but I can't since 30 minutes have passed.
Thank you for being someone who yells at people when they say stupid things.
>>126476
Once again, I'm really sorry, don't even read that shitty post at >>126555
I get into a both-sides mentality too easily when abuse is usually from one aggressor to someone whose aggression is usually just self-defense.
You clearly have many reasons to defend yourself, especially after what you've experienced and the overall person that moid appears to be.

Anonymous 126603

>>126486
you have the same mentality of a moid. stop slutshaming depressed women.
>>126600
thanks for owning up to your mistake instead of just running away from responsibility like a lot of people do.
>>126525
im not qualified to give any advice, but i just wanted to say i hope things get better for you. i know how it feels, thinking that the only love you'll get is from the lowest of the low. that pedofag doesn't deserve you.



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Anonymous 126416[Reply]

I found the best man ever and I started dating him and we get along so well together and my life has improved in so many ways since meeting him, but for some reason I'm not falling in love with him.

He can tell that I don't have strong feelings for him, and it's important to him that a girlfriend does. He talked about how betrayed he felt by a past girlfriend that was with him just to not be alone. I don't feel like I'm settling for him, my brain just doesn't produce the correct feelings that I need to have.

Why does life have to be this way? Am I broken? Asexual? I'm just going to be single for the rest of my life the way this is going and it's making me feel very anxious and sad.
10 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126474

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>>126417
I'm not latina

>>126450
>>126455
I feel like I can be myself around him, though we haven't known each other that long.

We haven't had sex but I can imagine myself hating that if it doesn't work out. Every other worry I've had has melted away the more I've gotten to known him, though.

Thanks for sharing your experiences, noonas. I still desperately wish I could try this anyway, but whatever happens I think I'm at least going to tell him what I feel, that way it's not just me deciding what to do but us together. If I'm lucky maybe he will offer his friendship instead and that will make me less lonely somehow.

Anonymous 126475

For me, sometimes observing my own feelings is like observing something with a microscope that is too small, that gets damaged by beams of light. If you are this way, and you haven't known each other for that long, then maybe you can just wait. Time and silence is sometimes all it takes for your inner thoughts to speak up. This is especially true if you've never been attracted to somebody in a long-term way before, you very well could just be slow to discern what you want. But if this is the case, then maybe try not to move forward (esp physically) until you can discern, as that would only increase mental noise and make it harder to figure out.

Also, are you like this in all other areas in life? Ex: if you adopt an animal, move, make new friends, change jobs/career ambitions/school concentrations, do you start worrying about your choices the same way you are with your boyfriend?

Anonymous 126480

>>126431
I think it's at least partly due to the fact many women are so used to men being complete garbage that when they meet one that's decent, who respects them and whom they respect, they'll interpret it as love. And from there, it's mostly just the usual cognitive bias and sunk cost fallacy that will trap them in a loveless relationship.

Anonymous 126573

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>>126475
I also experience feelings that way. I have to observe them indirectly a lot of the time. I'll notice that I've talked more than usual or that my thoughts are optimistic, and then conclude that I must be in a good mood.

I'm not really worrying about choices like that. I'm not worried about if he's the right one or not.

——–
Update on OP:

I talked to him yesterday and described what I feel and what I don't feel. He way okay with it so maybe he thinks it's still too early to be able to expect me to have strong feelings yet. I don't know what the usual timeline for these things are. I still have a feeling that it's not going to go my way in the end, though.

Anonymous 126579

>>126573
Progress, I guess. Did it alleviate the guilt any?



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on tinder to lose my virginity Anonymous 126509[Reply]

im 27 and a virgin, idk, it never happened to me and its getting kinda weird. i just wanna know what is like, and im too tired to form a real bond with some guy until it happens, i dont have any male friends or anything like that so i made a tinder acc

what do you think nonas? i do think is a questionable idea, but tbh every passing year i put less value into giving it to someone "worthy".

Anonymous 126513

it's more fun when it's with someone you enjoy
or is paid to give an actual good experience

Anonymous 126515

>>126509
Nona, don't do it.
Find someone you love and respects you.
Moids on tinder only want to have sex and then ghost you.

Anonymous 126518

Agree with >>126515 over here. Please don't waste your first time on a hookup up. The men on there won't care about pleasing you or meeting your needs. You gotta invest time to finding the right man who knows how to find the clit

Anonymous 126559

>>126509
I'm older than you and also a virgin.
Went to a small orgy, to "try things out", and no, didn't find anyone attractive, didn't want to have sex with anyone. I tried a few things out of curiosity, and like, it was kinda fun to just touch people and see how things work, but that was it, I've seen more interesting things that I think more about at my local aquarium.
You can really just stay a virgin forever, it doesn't matter noona. Are you an aquarium virgin because you never went to an aquarium? Ooh, so weird, it's an essential human experience to look at fish if you live in my city. (It kinda is to some people here, but that doesn't mean you actually need to go).
It's normal to masturbate and have fun with it, you really don't need to do more than that.
If you want an actual relationship or raise a child, that's different ofc, you can try getting into dating. But losing your virginity just for the sake of what, having a dick in your vagina just so you can tick a little box? Like, what's the point? There are other fun sex things you can try out, like buying sex toys or reading up on female masturbation advice. At least that stuff is fun.
>I really want to know how sex feels, people say it's fun
If you're forcing yourself, it definitely won't be though. I know a woman who is married and told me that she only had like one orgasm in her relationship, it's fucking bleak. I orgasm all the time by myself. If you have sex with someone, you also have that deep bonding aspect and communication thing and if you don't do that with someone you love, what are you doing it for, getting off? You probably won't, at least not with a random tinder hook-up.
And if you're really that desperate (why??), at least do this >>126513
If you don't like the title of "virgin" just don't call yourself a virgin. It's mostly weirdos who care about that shit anyway, nobody who matters cares.



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I'm a woman repulsed women who have sex Anonymous 126506[Reply]

Because they behave like a classless submissive to men pigs.
8 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126548

>>126535
i don’t get why she doesn’t hate the men instead

Anonymous 126551

>>126535
TBF I don't care. I don't care about your offsite grudges (especially since I think lolcow the website's existance is detestable, admittedly that goes both ways to you and your enemy) and this is literally the femcel messageboard.

Anonymous 126553

>>126548

Lolcow Farm users (and radfems in general) pretty much exclusively target other women for harassment, nitpicking, and abuse.

Anonymous 126556

>>126553
be the change you want to see in the world. destroy men and women who defend rapists if you have to go after a woman.

Anonymous 126558

>>126535
Ah, thanks for the info.
I was wondering who was going around posting this spam in other threads.
>>126486
>>126487
>>126505
>>126503
"BJ-chan" really likes to call women pigs, huh?
Awful.



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Is my the rapist right? Anonymous 126493[Reply]

When i told my therpist that i spoke with my previous friend for 4h a day she immidetely started shaming me by saying i expect too much time from people. She says that adults shouldn't have bonds with their friends bc they have their own hobbies, acitvities and partners and nobody will spend their life connected and bonded with me and spending 4h a day with me. it made me wanna die

Anonymous 126494

pretty sure your therapist is not supposed to make you wanna die
that sounds really weird, have you had any other "communication issues" with them like that?

Anonymous 126495

huh??
if your previous friend was fine with talking to you that often, why is ur therapist shaming u for that?
that's weird of them to say

Anonymous 126496

this sounds like a fake therapist. drop and get a new one asap.

Anonymous 126508

>>126493
Happy that you have a bestie like that.
I ended up dating my best friend personally and I visited her every day until nightfall if I couldn't stay the night (we were teenagers at our closest), she just made my life so much better. We tried dating for a bit because we were so close that people mistook us for a couple, but we really saw each other as friends and weren't attracted in a romantic way, so we broke up. We drifted a bit apart after that but our friendship was still on par with the romantic relationships I've had when it comes to closeness and I'm actually really happy we were this way, we enriched each other's lives, idc what anyone says.
I bet if you had said that you talk to your partner 4h a day, your therapist wouldn't have batted an eye.
I once had a friend who was actually demanding of my time and it was tedious, she'd get really upset with me if I didn't feel like chatting with her for a day and make a really big deal about it like "don't you like me anymore" etc. and just guilt-tripping me. I still liked her but I thought she was a bit clingy. (I was actually kinda crushing on her despite this tbh, she was just super cute even if we sometimes clashed, but that's beside the point.) Maybe your therapist mistakenly thinks it's a situation like that?
Either way, it sounds like your therapist is really missing out when it comes to close friendships. Maybe she doesn't have close bonds or maybe she's the type who thinks that only romantic relationships can be that close and anything else is weird.
>they have their own partners
Yeah, there it is.
There are some people who genuinely can't imagine being as close with a friend as they are with their spouse or whoever. It's tragic, really.



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Anonymous 126240[Reply]

So if this is a female version of 4chan, why don't you guys ever discuss race, politics, etc? Do you guys ever have race wars like 4chan? Are kikesses and pajeetas bullied here ?

Anonymous 126243

>>126240
Read the rules https://crystal.cafe/rules.html
What you're describing goes against rule 9.
>"discuss" race
Even on 4chan, racism outside of /b/ is against the rules (Global rule 3b), but both the moderation and more obviously the userbase in that shithole are just garbage.
>so there's no racism here, the site follows its own set rules and the moderation is great?
Nothing is perfect. Still not as abyssal as 4chan.

Anonymous 126386

>>126240
no, us women can't have an opinion on these matters.

Anonymous 126497

>>126240
No because we aren't retarded like 4chan moids



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Positivity. Anonymous 116556[Reply]

Share any positive feelings or positive things.

Garden your soul garden.
Every focus is infinite multiverses.
Keep watering the ideas/plants that make you feel the loveliest love


Here’s a thing that has made me feel so good and is important to me:
Thousands of Polska girls and Belarus girls are covering my NorthAmerican city with graffiti. They’ve somehow clearly gotten the idea to all become collectively like a splatoon. It has changed the energy immensely and really improved the omnipresent feminism quality~level vibe. These girls have religions about ancient euro queens and it really shows, lots of ethereal stuff.. I see so many soulful girls are more comfortable loitering around and making anywhere a party! That’s SO important! Sovl
52 posts and 7 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126265

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>do EEG in 2023
>got half conscious and nauseous like my brain got turned off after a drinking binge

>EEG now

>just really intense burning at the back of my head but I'm completely conscious

this illness took away all of my youth and I'm about to beat its ass
I just hate how I got gaslit that it was all psychosomatic for most of my life

Anonymous 126276

I'm at my favorite Cafe before I head into work. And I get to come in an hour late so I have extra time to bs and stuff.

Life is good to me (◕ᴗ◕✿)

Also! Happy Halloween nonas!

Anonymous 126379

>>116556
i keep ending up running into random restocks of niche perfume collabs i thought were gone and being able to score them. can’t wait for one of them to arrive today.

Anonymous 126490

I got approved for a credit card and a loan. Not in that order i might add.

Hooray for capitalism!

Anonymous 126492

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