/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Discuss your experiences, your recovery, and help out fellow miners who have dealt with and/or are currently dealing with anything related to sexual abuse/assault.

does anyone else feel extremely depressed/anxious a few days before their period?
i've noticed this occasional pattern in my mood, but unsure if it's a thing. usually PMS is depicted with feelings of anger.
in about 4 days im going to have my period and i'm feeling very down and hopeless for no particular reason, and i'm jumping to terrible conclusions about everything.

It happened 3 times already anons, i'm losing my mcfreakin mind and none were even full on rape

Everywhere i look there's predators. On the bus i see men grinding against women who can't move, at college there are known pervert teachers and no one does anything about it, on the street i see harassment and stares, my insurance covers for doctors who abused minors, my favourite musicians and artists are scum and fucked teens, so so many watch violent porn. With every woman i talk to, there is a story like this, of men hurting them just to get off.

I distrust every single man,no matter what they are to me, because these aren't isolated cases, the ones who are normal human beings seem to be the rarity.

But i just can't fucking take it anymore, the fear. They're everywhere, they're stronger and our justice system is completely useless against even rape with all the evidence.

It got to the point where i'm mildly suicidal. There is nowhere to run and i can't avoid them, it seems inevitable something will happen again judging by the experience of the women around me.

I don't know what to do anymore and can't take it much longer, currently i don't even want to bathe because i am disgusted about touching my body and being reminded of stuff that happened or could happen.

I grew up in a cult that had all the typical traditionalist views of women. I was given a highschool education but never encouraged to do more; In my family, women simply got married and had babies and for a long time that’s kind of what I expected for myself. But I eventually broke away from that cult and now I’m living all on my own in my early 20s. I feel like I’ve grown a lot; I support myself with a job (it’s nothing really special but it gets me by). I don’t have to worry about dressing modest or acting godly. I have my own apartment finally, a cat who I love, and honestly life is a lot better now. Things are good but I still feel the echoes of anxiety from the environment I grew up in.

My whole childhood I was trained to have all these expectations about life and the world and now that im free everything feels so… quiet.

My mom would always pester me about how I’m going to grow old alone if I couldn’t find a good man to take care of me. And now that I’ve left that cult, I really am alone and don’t have a lot of friends. I don’t care about marrying but I am scared of just fading away with my quiet life I have now. Part of me feels empty, like I could’ve done more with my life if my childhood wasn’t just thrown away for the men around me and the cult I grew up in. I guess I struggle with aimlessness. Have any other nonas come from a similar situation? How did you learn to adapt to your new life?

he is korean and we were in a long distance relationship, its been going well but i am scared to bring him to seattle because its a total shithole. he wants come and see the giant forests

I feel like a horrible being, I have a boyfriend for 4 years now and recently started lusting for my gym crush. Please read my backstory before judging me.

I was always on the taller side growing up (5'8) and most boys were afraid of me, I also had no big ass or breasts and was also very shy, no guys were into me during my school years. This developed in a huge complex over the years and it got me into working out. I think I got very lucky with my genes because I had an insane glow up. My butt is really big and cute and my I really like my long legs and shiny skin now. Shortly after I started to work out a guy kept hitting on me, I first thought he was trying to pull a prank or just pump and dump me because he was very tall and handsome. Well we are now together for 4 years and I never had interest in other guys, it's more the contrary, I started to develop a disgust for other men because now that I'm attractive they all hit on me or try dumb stare downs.

So I switched gym last year together with my boyfriend and I noticed a really short guy (maybe 5'6?) who was very obese working out at our gym. He is extremely shy and talks with nobody, I see him every time when I work out. He lost all his weight over the last year and his transformation is admirable. He looks like an Italian/Spanish mini Henry Cavill. Now this is where the problem starts, I started to "like" him. I noticed that he sometimes looks at me but I kept ignoring him during all the time and now he stopped to look at me. Back then I didn't care but once he glown up I started to enjoy his attention. I know I sound like a basic gym bitch. I also kept catching myself thinking about him, asking myself why he doesn't have a girlfriend or why he is so shy. My boyfriend noticed me looking at me at him sometimes and at first he got passive aggressive during our home rides. I asked him and after some tries he opened up asking me what I want with that short guy (he insulted him very mean ways). I told him it's nothing and that he is imagining things. The disputes with my boyfriend are getting worse and it's starting to tax me. I really love him but I'm so confused. The more often we quarrel the more the intrusive toughs get into my head. Did my current boyfriend just abuse the fact that I was a shy girl back then and he made use of my weakness? I really had a bad self esteem before I had my glow up. He also has no attacking point because my gym crush doesn't even hold eye contact with mePost too long. Click here to view the full text.

Being a fat woman is hell on earth especially when i realize the fact I can never find any moid who is decent to date. the only people who wan to date me are weirdos and dudes online.

Im early/mid twenties khv and just recently began trying to challenge myself by actually speaking to moids and making an effort to find my own relationship instead of just waiting for them to come to me cuz it just ain’t happening.

I found a dood local to me and we've been messaging daily for a few weeks and met up twice. I felt like we actually got on really well, I felt like the conversations went well (which is big for me) and it’s the most comfortable I’ve felt around a moid, but the longer I've been messaging him I've started feeling really insecure. Like thinking does he find me annoying is he just entertaining me because he feels guilty and waiting for me to finally shut up? I feel like the messages became a bit more trivial as time has gone on but outside of that I don't think he's really done anything to make me feel this way and it could just be my own self-hatred but it's making me really deppresso.

I’ve always been pretty low maintenance with friendships like maybe messaging people once a week so I’m finding the daily messaging a bit awkward, like I want to speak to him but I also worry that I’m taking up too much of his time and that he doesn’t actually want to talk to me that often if at all? I also feel like cause we’ve spoke so often there’s not much new or interesting to say and I’ve used up all my best jokes and stories. The text convos used to be quite long but now they’re kinda short and shallow.

I thought I’d post this in case any other nonas could relate, I don’t know how I can make this better, if it will go away naturally or if I should just dip bcoz I don’t wanna feel sad ☹ part of me thinks maybe honestly is the best policy and maybe I should ask him if he actually wants to speak to me but that also reeks of my insecurity which would probably put him off and make me look like I was baiting for attention. I was feeling so hopeful at first and I just don’t want to lose out on what I thought could’ve actually been really good. Pls halp s

I already hate my roommate, whom I’ve never met. She’s really popular and seems like the type who will always have guys over in our room. Is it petty of me to put in a room request change? It won’t even be processed since we’ve never met.

I’ve lived with many extroverted roommates before who always had people over in our room. I just want my room to be a place I can relax in because I become a mean and bitter person very quickly when I don’t have a place to be at peace.