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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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Anonymous 64362[Reply]

>This whole board

Anonymous 64386

>>64362
A pseudointellectual South American mutt tripfag who doesn't know how to use prepositions in English properly and always types in all caps?

Anonymous 64429

>>64362
Why does /lit/ have so many tripfags, and why are they all significantly more annoying than the tripfags on other boards?

Anonymous 64431

>>64429
They think they’re smart and interesting for using big words and reading books.

Anonymous 64461

As long as your are alive you can change for the better

Anonymous 64462

this guy huffs his own farts



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Anonymous 64298[Reply]

>my dad is pretty aloof and doesn’t seem to really give a shit about me.
>it hurts my feelings a ton idk I think that’s pretty normal but maybe I’m just a huge immature baby.
>that’s why my bf thinks at least, because when I started crying he told me to grow up and get over it.
>which also turned into him telling me what a piece of shit I was. How he takes care of me but I care more about my family and just tons of other mean horrible things, cause why the heck not. It just turned into a pitty party for himself.
>idk ladies I kinda just wanna kill myself. I probably would if I didn’t have my dogs
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 64310

Abusive men often seek out women who were previously abused because it's easy to push them back into abusable patterns of behavior. Your BF knows exactly what he's doing. Dump him.

Not much I can say about your dad. Try to always be financially and emotionally independent, you don't need a dad. That's easier said than done but always remember that you are a complete person who deserves a good life. Sometimes it takes a lot of struggle to get it, but you deserve it, and therefore the struggle is worth it.

Anonymous 64322

cc.jpg


Anonymous 64325

>>64298
Because I'm sure you're being perfectly objective and accurately portraying what happened.

You will never be successful in relationships if you perpetually make yourself the victim.

Anonymous 64327

I can relate, my dad has always been an emotionally absent and neglectful. No overt abuse, but he definitely does the bare bare minimum as far as interacting with me. As I’ve gotten older I’ve kind of assumed that he had abuse in his childhood and like, literally can’t connect emotionally to people, especially his kids. Not to make excuses, but it’s helped me deal and make peace with his behavior.

Anonymous 64329

>>64327
Oh and your bf is an asshole lmao



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help help help Anonymous 47485[Reply]

i have no friends online or irl. i spend excessive amounts of time on anonymous messaging services like omegle (and a few tor sites), usually 2 or three hours a day. im such a shit person i drive everyone i love away. i constantly feel like im dyimg, literally. i always have this feelimg in my chest that i suffocating, sometimes its not that bad and sometimes its worse, but its always there. im incapable of communicating with other human beings for anything but necessity. the best i can do is 30 minute conversations over text, and that normally doesnt go well. im a boring person, my only real hobbies are home ec type things like sewing and knitting, and i play the flute but am pretty shitty.
Last night me and my very last friend were fighting so i told him "i fucking hate you, never talk to me again and i wish i never met you" (paraphrased, but you get the point).
anyway, you get the gyst of it. how do i repair myself? am i beyond saving? i used to be kind of cool but then i turned to shit.
i hate myself. i hate myself so much and i hate the world.

if youre advice is "kill yourself" please at least describe the method you suggest i use thats most effective (no guns pls). im open to almost any suggestions, and will try anything to fix myself.

Anonymous 47486

Get off the internet and go to therapy anon.

Anonymous 47490

>>47485
Basically what >>47486 said, anon. How's your family life? Could they be of any help?

Anonymous 48383

>>47485
>if youre advice is "kill yourself"
Anon, this isn't 4chan.

Sage because no real contribution but I hope you'll sort your shit out. I second >>47486

Anonymous 64280

>>47485
Internet addiction. Go get help and watch serial experiments Lain.



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Digital Footprint Anonymous 61424[Reply]

Does anyone else get anxious over thinking about how much of 'you' is out here? Like how much you've put out into cyberspace?

I've been using the internet from a very young age. I've certainly made my mark, but I wish I could keep it all 'under control' and know exactly what it is I have out there. I have a lot of old cringy posts out there someone that I posted under a username I still use to this day. On YouTube I also have a video of me doing some stupid shit, waiting to be recommended and turned into the next meme or some shit. I wish we could just delete all traces of ourselves.

I've been feeling extra anxious now that lots of girls are using sites like 'Onlyfans' and exposing themselves all over the internet. I mean… that shit can't be erased. You're gonna just post yourself doing fetish/porn stuff like that? For all to see? With no way to get rid of it? My ultimate fear is someone gathering all my posts and info to embarrass me.
42 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 64222

>>64173
you should hate blm for focusing so much on trans issues and the organisers being millionaires. obv the part about black people matter is fine

Anonymous 64238

>>64152
>>64153
VPN will give some protection, but it isn't a failsafe. For one, VPN hosting companies have access to all of your information, especially if they keep logs. If your VPN provider is hosted in a 5eyes country or in another country that provides a similar type of intelligence alliances, VPN providers will be required to hand in information to the feds if need be.

Split tunneling is also dangerous due to vulnerabilities in security.

>>64173
Why are you ashamed? Are you one of those white girl "allies" who think that posting Black Lives Matter or some other virtual signaling crap in their twitter/instagram bio is actually helping people?

Anonymous 64239

>>64238
I honestly don't get why some people are so paranoid about it. They won't arrest people that aren't doing anything too crazy. Also, people change their minds all the time. What I have fun doing on chans is that I can be whatever I want to be without having to create a fake or anything.

Anonymous 64246

>>64239
They're paranoid because it's part of their beliefs. They believe that the feds have no rights snooping into their stuff, even if it's not bad. Privacy is important, even if you are doing no harm.

>What I have fun doing on chans is that I can be whatever I want to be without having to create a fake or anything.


That's why imageboards are so wonderful. No need for accounts or namefagging just anonymity.

Anonymous 64250

>>64239
>They won't arrest people that aren't doing anything too crazy.
>If you're innocent you have nothing to hide.
Fuck you and fuck people like you.



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little brother using /r9k/ Anonymous 52252[Reply]

Back when he was 12, and i was 17, i caught my brother with Aspergers using /r9k/. I stopped him right away and told him to never go back there again. Well, 3 years later, guess what i found? He was still using it.
He doesn't have friends, but he is smart, and despite going to a good high school with high expectations, he still gets great grades.
I don't want him to ruin his future and end up like them.
Is there any way to help him?
82 posts and 8 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 57894

>>57303
I don't get what you are trying to say here.
Being a moid doesn't mean browsing r9k. The amount of moids who browse r9k are a very small fraction of the general male populace.

Anonymous 57952

>>52430
No i like cc better

Anonymous 57954

A late reply to your thread, but as someone who is the 'loser younger sibling' please don't act in a patronizing way towards him or being an overly protective guardian angel. Try and speak in a respectful tone and on his level, it's embarrassing to be told what to do.

Anonymous 64091

>>55157
Good insightful post.

Anonymous 64196

Take him to an independant fundamental baptist church. /r9k/ used to be funny greentext stories back in 2012 but now it's just gay recruitment. In fact, I'd describe all of 4chan like this. Don't let your brother end up as a tranny. You gotta put your foot down and tell him to stop browsing it and give him that reason specifically. Homophobia is a good way to appeal to a man's senses. If he has any shred of being straight left he will feel ashamed commiserating with transvestites and cease his behavior.



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Anonymous 63256[Reply]

Do you guys seriously fall in love all the time or is there something wrong with me? I'm 23, almost 24 and never fallen in love. I always had to make up I was in love with X when classmates asked at school because everyone had a crush on someone. I'm still waiting for it, for the day I don't just find someone physically attractive but also not annoying and retarded. I have read that it's completely normal to not fall in love until later in life but at this point I think I'm gonna stay like this forever. It's actually fucking painful, I crave a romantic relationship with people I make up in my mind but when I think of anyone real I just can't.
>inb4 gay
I already know I'm gay, I probably hate women more than men because I don't have anything in common with them.
>inb4 rape
I was never raped/traumatized in some way that could have scared me away from romantic contact and human relationships in general. While growing up no one in my family was in a romantic relationship so there weren't any romantic displays of affection around, so that could be it but it sounds too retarded.

Anyone else has gone through this?
4 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 63263

I'm 28 and I've never been in love. I made up crushes in school, too. Nowadays, I enjoy relationships*. I enjoy sex. I've just never been "in love". I don't think it's abnormal at all.

Anonymous 63264

>I probably hate women more than men because I don't have anything in common with them.

You sound like you have autism OP

Anonymous 63309

atrsy.jpg

>>63261
>Usually I get a bit into the person, then as I end up knowing them it gets cold really quick.

Relatable. I liked flirting with guys but when they confessed to me it was like getting a trophy and I wasn't interested in them anymore. I thought I'd try dating one once because I thought I'd love him more over time, but it always felt like a fun game or playing around or something.

Then I met a guy and actually fell in love for the first time. With my current boyfriend I actually think of getting married and staying forever. With other guys I always thought "we'll have fun together until we start arguing too much or fall out eventually." Because I believed finding someone to love like in fiction was impossible, there would always be some part of me that didn't match the other person and we'd argue over it and such, and I did not feel the need to have a family so I would never settle with a relationship like that.

So I met my boyfriend who is extremely respectful, modest, kind yet firm, understanding and balanced, and I ended up loving him before I even knew it. It felt totally different from anything, and it wasn't dramatic like in movies either, I can describe it if anyone wants to know.
I used to think "falling in love" was like talking to a cute, fun guy and getting super excited over him.

>>63256

OP, since you have fantasies and want romantic relationships, but you can't fall in love with real people, you probably just have high standards, and that's ok. It's just going to take effort, time, luck, or all three to find someone to match you. I came across my boyfriend by total chance, and before him I was 99% sure I'd be alone forever because of my specific standards, I was totally fine with it. I also don't feel "physical attraction" like "I wish he'd date/fuck me" unless it's a polished celebrity or something, most of the time I just go "wow, pretty person" in the aesthetic sense.

Anonymous 63333

>>63261
>Usually I get a bit into the person, then as I end up knowing them it gets cold really quick
Yes, this happens to me too. There is a strong initial interest from me and in a few days I'm just not interested anymore. All the friends I have were the ones putting effort in the relationship and including me until I got used to them, it took me like 1 year to get used to my university circle. I have one Internet friend who I have known for 8 years already, probably the only person I could ever be 100% honest with cuz I met her in 4chan and I need to constantly remind myself to put effort into our relationship, if I'm not in the social mood it feels like a hassle.

>As I got older I started to think that love is a thing that is built instead of something that it is there

I hear this all the time but I'm not even sure if I could differentiate friendship from love in a long term relationship. Whenever I tell someone a bf/gf is a friend who you like to fuck they go "lol no" but I really don't understand the difference.

>>63309
I'm glad you did find someone, gives me hope, yet it terrifies me that maybe the person I fall for won't ever reciprocate and it will be a once in a lifetime thing. Fuck.

Anonymous 64150

>>63260
aromantic?



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asexuals in denial club Anonymous 26756[Reply]

Anyone else an asexual in denial?

>have never felt sexual attraction to anyone or anything (don't even know what it would feel like)

>SO confused by what people mean when they say they fucked someone because they couldnt control themselves
>never get aroused
>have never had pleasurable sex

Now this wouldn't be a problem, but I still desire a relationship. Therefore it causes me constant despair because I have a boyfriend that I will never desire sexually. If i had one wish a functional fucking sex drive would be it, fuck world peace or money.
12 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 26878

>>26858
Where did you get them tested? Do you go to your family doctor?

Anonymous 26880

>>26878
Yes, I told my own doctor. I told her about other symptoms I was having that could possibly be thyroid related and she advised blood work, and I asked if I could have my other hormones tested as well.

Anonymous 26884

>>26880
:(

I'm going in next week to see if I can have a full hormone panel done. I've also had irregular periods for the first time in my life the last couple months. But I think thats because I have a very poor diet due to some disordered eating habits I'm now improving.

Wondering if I should ask to do a full blood test to look for deficiencies too.

Anonymous 64047

AD4EC98C-7729-4220…

i am in the same boat. i tried masturbating as a child because thats what i saw people do in porn ( i had an addiction until i turned 15 and got radicalized against it ) and didnt feel anything but extreme disgust before during and after and even when i am "in the mood" but really this only happens when i am ovulating and it happens randomly like nothing really triggers it or arouses me i feel nothing at all just pure disgust for myself and my "perversion"
safe to say i have never orgasmed in my life
for most of my life i have claimed to be a lesbian due to my fear of men and my general preference for the female figure but now im not even sure if i can call myself that because i dont ever want to have sex ( its not like i will be getting anyway, im an incel )

Anonymous 64132

>>64047
ur prob lez with low libido luv



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How to live for myself? Anonymous 63918[Reply]

I feel like everything I do is for male approval. I structure my entire life around men and any interests or hobbies I partake in is a manufactured attempt to get potential male attention. I am unwilling to do anything unless men will perceive it. If I eat alone, or entertain myself alone, I feel like I'm wasting myself. I feel like a scarce resource instead of a human being.
Somewhere in adolescence I forgot how to enjoy things for my own sake, to do things because I want to, like I did as a kid. Does anyone one else feel this way? I just want to reset myself, become a person again. To live independently of men and do what I want, without worrying about whether it makes me attractive or not. But my brain just screams at me if I'm not constantly making myself available and attractive to men. Please advise
3 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 63964

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>>63918
By living for your kids (your future)

Anonymous 63977

is it possible you’re depressed anon? maybe revisit your relationship with your father in childhood.

Anonymous 64005

>Ever stopped to think that your desire to live for yourself is just a way to seem more interesting and authentic to males?
Yes. does this rabbit hole ever end
>>63964
please explain this image to me I'm retarded

personally I recommend deleting your social media

Anonymous 64010

>>63960
>reconnecting with how you were as a kid - what did you do for fun, just for yourself
YES this actually seemed to work best for me. i filled a flashcart with DS games I used to play as a kid and spent hours playing them by myself, for myself, just channeling that 7-yr-old energy and not caring about anything else for the first time in a long time. Definitely a good start

Anonymous 64075

>>63918
I feel this way all the fucking time. and its not like i even like the attention. usually men being pests toward me feels violating, and yet i feel brainwashed to want it. i grew up in a very misogynistic household tho.



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Cheating Anonymous 64022[Reply]

Has anyone ever cheated on you? My ex did, and now I have severe trust issues.
4 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 64030

No, I can't be cheated on, if I am a femcel. But the thought of a boyfriend cheating on me makes me physically sick.

Anonymous 64045

>>64030
This.

Anonymous 64050

hmm.png

My ex did this too. He admitted to me on cheating on a girl in his university by kissing her. He later tried to tell me it was just a hug to gain my trust back. My reaction was probably very cold. It's like I instantly lost my interest for him the moment he admitted to kissing another woman. I just told him to live his life and stopped talking to him. Then we both disapeared from each other's lives and never talked again.

Anonymous 64051

>>64022
my ex cheated on me and told me by sending me pics of him fucking another girl. I honestly didn't even care, because it made me instantly lose interest in him

Anonymous 64073

>>64022
First boyfriend. Gave me esteem issues I struggle with today, 14 years removed from the event.



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People basically ignore me all the time Anonymous 61836[Reply]

What the title is. I have always been ignored. When I was a kid this wasn't so bad.

I was an only child and fairly solitary in general, happy to keep my own company. As an adult I have a miniscule social circle, interacting mostly with my fiance, mother, and coworkers. I had friends at one point but they have all disappeared, swallowed up by distance or their children.I have tried starting MeetUps to engage with people, but my group got derailed by a Troon and I lost members and those neonate friendships.

I was at a company function on Friday and I was sitting alone. It ocurrred to me that no one gave a shit that I was there, and so I just walked out early and took 1/2 the day off. Today is Monday and no one has mentioned it. No one noticed it. I could have walked up to talk to someone but at this point I'm so tired trying to generate conversation/relationships with people.

All my life I have been the one reaching out and no one has ever made the attempt to reach back. I am worried that I am starting to get used to being alone/friendless/unnoticed, because it scares me. When I am 30/35/40 and beyond, am I still going to be a friendless faggot? Will I even care?
12 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 62700

maxresdefault.jpg

>>62656
Honestly, living like this for so long I have just had to find comfort in having pets I spoil and talk to. My cats are always meowing and wanting to play with me, and it fills the void pretty well most days. I plan on eventually being able to have some bigger pets like horses that I can spend time training and working with to get that pseudo-social interaction. I talk out loud to my animals and have who conversations with em while they look on. Plus I read a lot of books and play RPGs with companion characters so I can pretend I have friends who would do anything for me. RPGs definitely fill the void in a real way- doing loyalty quests and giving gifts to characters who you can befriend. I guess it's pitiful but it's not like I have any friends to judge me lmao! I'm pretty sure Dragon Age literally saved me from killing myself a few years back when I was at my loneliest.

Anonymous 63046

Have you think if the problem is that everybody ignores you or pheraps you choose to socialize with assholes who dont value you? If your family dont show much interest in you and you are used to it since childhood it makes sense that you replicate that coldness with other relationships.
When is matter or friends and socialization there is always a patron, subconsciously humans are attracted to people who feels familiar for them or adjusted to their own personality. Take your time to think what personality traits or background do your "friends" have in common, and ask yourself why you feel attracted to them even if they hurt you, you will start to realise things.
In my opinion you should start to feel more confident with yourself and enjoy your time alone doing what you enjoy, this will make you more confident and naturally more atractive for people who are worth.

Anonymous 63048

>>63046
You meet one or two assholes in your life, but is everyone an asshole?
I also disagree with the "worth" argument, OP seems to be the one without worth, I doubt that people with friends who have the luxury to ignore a friendless nobody have no worth. They have a lot of worth in society.

Anonymous 63071

>>63048
There's being brutally honest and then there's just being insensitive. OP is sad and scared about being a "friendless nobody" and you just had to rub it in.

Anonymous 64068

>>62700
Literally me but with Mass Effect.



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