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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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Do not respond to maleposters. See Rule 7.
Please read the rules! Last update: 04/27/2021

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Anonymous 120913[Reply]

neeting was fun but now I need to go out and get my hands on some cash and books. I get bored at home. I will earn money downscale then lollygag around the world. I'm hoping going out will give me a clear picture on the topic of being in a relationship. I love summer.

Anonymous 120931


Anonymous 120933

>>120931
I like how my message number ended in 13 and yours in 31^^
<3



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Wish I could just… create. I’m so tired. Anonymous 120902[Reply]

I’m so burnt out and miserable in my life, I try to use writing to escape but I can’t. I want to make a comic more than anything but once I plot out everything and have the script ready and I just have to draw it out all motivation is just… gone. Same with all the other creative projects in my life, I lose all drive to do them and it’s so goddamn frustrating , and I end up abandoning them.

I’ve vastly decreased my social media usage and have been getting decent enough sleep, and I’m an okay artist, I don’t know what I’m doing wrong!

I don’t want to be one of those failure artists that just go on social media to joke about how they never actually get anything done, and just talk about their story and never have any real project.

Smfh.

Does anybody know how to get out of this? It’s “first world problems” I know, but I really don’t want the shame and embarrassment hanging over my head years from now.

Anonymous 120903

>>120902
This is how I am with my writing. Sometimes you just don't have the inspiration or motivation. Let me know if you find a way to get it back nona

Anonymous 120909

>>120902
You just have to start. Tell yourself you're only going to do a simple sketch, and momentum will carry you. It's like when I don't want to clean. I tell myself I'm just going to dust a bit of one room, then it's all the rooms, then the house is basically done.



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Anonymous 120841[Reply]

I think over the years of being too online I have realised that women suffer from porn addiction too but it is not talked about enough. I'm not talking about reading romance novels, fics, yaoi etc. I'm talking about full blown dependency. I know someone from an online community who was looking at Steven Universe nsfw when the next day she had final exams. I used to come from work and waste 2-3 hours everyday looking at weird shit and interacting.
I'm almost there where I break away from my demons and I feel so light these days. It took a lot of journalling and self reflection but I'm satisfied. I cringe at my past self. What brought me to seek improvement was how fast I was adopting fetishes and kinks I never had. But the worst part was losing my focus on work. Its getting better now but I have a long way to go. My cause of issues was my inability to get into romantic relations but instead of trying to form them I replaced it with this.

Anonymous 120852

>>120841
I think porn could be used in moderation, that is when you're actually horny. Most people just look at it when they're bored and not horny.

Anonymous 120863

>>120852
Yeah but I'm the kind of person that struggles with moderation so I'm always at the extreme end of things I hate it so I would rather avoid it. Its the same reason I have never attempted smoking or drinking. I think theres an addiction problem in my family so I think it is something genetic upto a point

Anonymous ## Cleanup crew 120898

Moved to >>>/nsfw/14858.



Asexual Spectrum Identities Anonymous 120236[Reply]

What are your thoughts on asexuality and identifying as asexual?
20 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 120810

I identified as asexual for many years because it was easier to assert my repressed sexual desires as nonexistent than to deal with the deeply seated discomfort I feel towards my body and physical touch in general. It felt better to have a non-sexuality than a failed one.

Anonymous 120830

I won't be bother by it if any other online person who claim to be it just use it as a front to be gross and talk about fetishes and sex stuff under the guides of "fetishes aren't something inherently sexual", I used to have this online friend who was FTM and she always derailed conversation into something sexual and/or fetishistic and when I call it out she called me a prude and when I asked about her so claimed "asexuality" she said she just finds sexual stuff quirky and has an "autistic" fascination with it and that she doesn't get any sexual pleasure from it, I am too timid to seek out any friends be it online or off so I put up with it for about 3 month, don't get me wrong I have no problem talking about sexual stuff is just that I prefer to do it with a person I already know for a long time and I am comfortable around it's a part of adult life and I understand that, also of course this is just one person but I seen so many twitter artist who draw sexual stuff and swear to God and back they are asexual and you are just a creep for seeing it as sexual.

Anonymous 120831

I think it's fine to use it as a label and it's a real thing not to experience any sexual attraction. but I don't think it should be part of the queer community

Anonymous 120838

>>120362
Demisexual has always been weird to me since I'm bi and it could describe my attraction to men but not to women (I'm just attracted to women normally). I think it's retarded to label this as a sexuality but I don't really know why it's like this for me either.

Anonymous 120842

i would consider myself asexual because i've never had a crush on a real person. people my age often talk about fantasizing about others, but i've literally never done that before. but, i think that the spectrum of asexual identities are way too wide.



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Anonymous 120771[Reply]

Everyone is doing sm better than me and working hard. I need to do better or I will be left behind. Aaaahhhh enough. The way I can only choose hard work or comfort. I don't think I want a family to much work for life and too much worries.
3 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 120776

This is what trying to go cold turkey on sugar will do to you. Cannot wait for college. I want to lay in arms of a man that luls me to sleep

Anonymous 120777

I need to eat more fruit and more coffee yeah yeah bzbyyyyyy
This world is not your clay anymoreeee stick to the path pleaseeee

Anonymous 120778

I wish I was normal about food. Hmmm I need to wash my eye mask and some other clothes. Cotton is so fuckimg expensive these dayssss I WANT A BAJILLION DOLLARS N0W

Anonymous 120779

I quit listening to music. At max only podcasts. There is something so hypnotic that it leads to me day dreaming.

Anonymous 120782

Manwha_fight class…

Nobody is coming to save me You need to fight your vices on your ownI cannot have a balance I need to leave entirely I need stimulants I need to run in park like its 2014 with heavy raining I never want to see bad things ever again God help me



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i genuinely dont think love, friendship, any kind of human companionship is possible for me Anonymous 120144[Reply]

who relat

Anonymous 120145

i feel chronically empty all the time i feel nothing at all and it is everything at the same time at once . im literally biblical depictions of the devil incarnated into a girl

Anonymous 120164

I used to feel the same. Getting professional mental help helped me.

Anonymous 120209

Me for love. I can't fathom living with someone or not having a bedroom to myself. I want to be in love but I can't imagine myself pursuing a relationship in the way that others do. I get very irritated when around someone nonstop for over a week, even if I care for them. I always joke that I should date a pilot

Anonymous 120244

i fel you nona im considering renouncing any type of relationship ever. its like im in a desert island away from everyone i know and i cant reach anyone, nor anyone can reach me. i tried but im tired of trying.

Anonymous 120781

I can relate I always self sabatoge every relationship I have whether it's platonic or romantic it's horrible



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I am a lizard person Anonymous 120651[Reply]

I am a lizard person, I am a shapeshifter, and there are many lizard persons out there. We aren’t all the cliche’s many people like to believe where we want to rule the world.. A lot of us suffer with narcissism, and Identity theft / Issues because of this. I sometimes feel alone, and I’ve had altercations when I have shifted on camera, and even I feel really anxious to look back on them because I look foul. I feel sad because every other traumatic event rhag happens to me I shift into a new identity, and face. I do this because I am scared to remain the same identity. I am yet to be apart of the hidden community, but I am not a threat. I’m just a girl
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 120661

I once dreamt of meeting a lizard person, she hypnotised me and used her long tongue to probe my brain through my ear and I passed out

Anonymous 120670

7772379C-359B-4FD2…

Hi, fellow lizard. What kind of lizard you are by the way?

Anonymous 120714

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Anonymous 120718

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Anonymous 120766

Same



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There is not a place in the world, real or virtual, that you can escape to. Anonymous 120761[Reply]

The internet is an oppressed virtual wasteland, with few oases that are already dried up, and no ways of escaping to truly greener pastures. Alienation and isolation are inevitabilities. The less you conform, the lonelier the road you walk is. Once you’ve realized the madness of our current reality, how flawed humanity society truly is, you will understand that to be sane is to be miserable.


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is being subscribed to onlyfans cheating? Anonymous 120534[Reply]

back in dec 24, i found some messages on my bfs phone from a sex worker on reddit that he sought out. the way the messages were made it seem like it wasnt the first time he had done something like this, so since then i had been suspicious that maybe this was a constant thing for him.
i then found through an apple payment that he paid someone for something on of, but i couldnt get into his account, until today.
i finally got in his account and saw he was subscribed to multiple workers and also was talking to them. ik obviously for them, thats literally their job, to talk to people, but the way some of the conversations went made me feel hurt.
i want to also add that, as long as it isnt an addiction, i dont care if he watches porn, i do too. my problem is the fact he is paying a lot of money for it and the conversations hes had with some of them talking about his interests, recommending them music, etc. stuff that feels personal.
i feel like its borderline cheating, but at the same time i dont know. i’ve never been in a situation like this and don’t really know how to feel nor what to do. it just also sucks because lately things between us have been stagnant and stressful, just from things happening to us separately, it isnt helping us be our full selfs atm, so adding this really makes everything feel even worse.
he told me he wants to be with me, and i want to work it out, but at what cost?
14 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 120580

>>120566
If you were actually sorry he just wouldn't have done this in the first place.
The only thing he's sorry about is that he got caught.

Anonymous 120582

>>120566
Good on you for seemingly working through your issues. I hope it works out for you both. Being compassionate and having self-worth can be compatible.

Anonymous 120585

it’s even worse than cheating cos he’s spending money for YOUR presents and treats on another woman. if he has disposable income why the fuck isn’t he spending it on you?

Anonymous 120587

>>120585
If he has disposable income he should be
>investing
>paying down debt
>saving for a house deposit

Anonymous 120737

>>120536
This. Why can’t he confide in op. Paying for only fans is pretty pathetic. Like at least he’s not cheating and bringing disease . He should be ok on the free porn pass.



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Anonymous 120690[Reply]

19 years old
I feel so ashamed every time I like someone and I have never had a boyfriend. I have never been asked out by a moid. I thought that once I entered later teenagehood, that these relationships would be thrown at me inevitably. However, the only people that have asked me out were other women and for the most part, none of them I wanted to be with. I have tried to make subtle advances on guys before even though I dislike doing it because I'm a freak with aspergers and can't handle myself well, but none of them have really reciprocated in a meaningful way.
There's a coworker I have at my job who is one year younger than me and I can't stop myself from thinking about him. He's not someone outstandingly unachievable and attractive, he's on the shorter side (under 5'10) but his face is so fucking beautiful, I can't even look at him unless we're talking. I hate myself so badly for liking him, yet I can't help myself from thinking about when the next time will be that I'll get to talk to him, when I'll get to see him, what he's doing.
I'd like to think I'm not super unattractive, maybe cripplingly average instead and perhaps it's just my lack of social skills that has done me in when it comes to relationships. I have received compliments from guys before (mostly older), have even been catcalled. I'm pretty underdeveloped for my age I guess, I'm shorter than average and underweight. I've been told I seem like I'm a very awkward person and hard to talk to before by a guy as well. I used to get made fun of a lot when I was younger but I think I grew out of a lot of the stuff I got made fun of for after puberty.
Despite that, I still don't have a boyfriend while all the other girls my age have boyfriends. I don't even have any irl friends as I was very truant in school and ended up being transferred to an online program (though that's another conversation), so I lost all the ones I did sort of have, yet I felt like they were always only friends with me out of pity. I always feel so terribly guilty and horrible every time I begin to like someone, like I've telepathically molested him just by having feelings for him. I can't ever shake this feeling of shame that makes me extremely depressed and I just end up convincing myself I don't stand a chance.
A lot of the time I tell myself that it's not worth it because it'll end up being more trouble than it's worth and that I'm too asocial and weird to be a good girlfriend to anyone. I always feePost too long. Click here to view the full text.
1 post omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 120699

>>120691
Thank you for your advice. To be honest, I don't have any female figures in my life that I can talk to readily. I don't have any female friends at all anymore, even online, though I desperately want them. I feel very shy when I talk to other girls and almost afraid but I desire them in my life. I'm still actively trying to find another girl/girls, preferably being like the friends I had before.
As for the stuff about social cues, I think I get by just barely by mimicking what I see other people do, however there will be points where too much of myself slips out and I embarrass myself. I've done this countless times, even with the coworker mentioned. It's like I just start saying whatever comes to my mind to fill the silence without thinking.
About the gym and dance classes, I think it's a particularly good idea. I get wound up a lot and I find that repetitive movements or exercise helps, though I'm a bit too nervous to approach stuff like a gym yet. I used to bike a lot but I kept getting into weird ass encounters with people (like people yelling bizarre shit at me from their cars) and it got to a point to where I just didn't want to do it anymore.

Anonymous 120700

I didn't have a boyfriend until I was 21, now I'm married. Yeah it's embarrassing but things change.

Anonymous 120705

>>120690
>he's on the shorter side (under 5'10)
This made me laugh lol.

I'd say don't worry about it. Being social is a skill you can always improve if you want to.

Anonymous 120706

>>120690
Teen relationships rarely last. You dodged a bullet.

Anonymous 120715

>>120690
I also struggled a lot with those feelings of shame. I'd compare myself with some ideal version of me that had used every opportunity, done everything right, whatever. The perfect me. And I'd think: "I deserve nothing, because I failed to become that person." That's not what life is, though. Everybody could have done better. It's about learning from your mistakes and improving little by little–building momentum in the right direction. You aren't undeserving of a love because you're imperfect at 19 years old. I can't really help you with social awkwardness, but I'll second the recommendation of getting some exercise. The body controls the mind more than the mind controls the body, so get yourself some feelgod chemicals that way and you'll probably feel a lot better about this crush.



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