/feels/ - Advice & Venting

>>104330
I’m just annoyed by the fact every space for women online gets flooded by men who want to pretend they’re women.

>>104331
It’s happening especially with lesbian spaces too. even on r/actuallesbians where you’d expect actual lesbians to be because of the name, it’s full of bisexual women who are tranny lovers and calling lesbians transphobic for not liking dick havers.

>>104333
it’s so exhausting too, everything devolves into reaffirming their fetishes.

is it that grippy sock jail or whatever femcel group? that group is full of troons and moids who ruined the fun

>>104335
yeah, that’s the one. the troons there don’t even try to not sound like moids.

>>103992
it sounds like you've found him, i truly envy you. like i mean im only 19, but i doubt much is gonna come my way, everything i try goes totally wrong, last guy i was with was like 9 months ago and we got on really well. but he blew off valentine and i was like nope, havent spoken to him since, but i still think about him all the time, he was really sweet, and i almost gave my virginity to him.

>>103992
> I have no friends in my adult life. I've always wondered what it would be like. I mainly just hang out with my husband all of the time. He doesn't have any friends either but he really doesn't seem to mind it. When I've asked him about it he's said "You're the only person in my life that I'm truly myself around. I'd take 1 of you over 1000 of anyone else. no contest" and to a certain extent I feel the same

Can relate, honestly it never gets lonely though people do look at us and complain we are too codependent and that we should have our own separate friend groups to have a healthy relationship. I am just too tired and exhausted to do much of that and go out and meet new friends, I’d rather stay at home and hang with my husband or go out with him.

>>103992
I have no advice or answer to your questions but can I ask how you got to know your husband and how you found each other? Your relationship is exactly my ideal.

>>104010
>>104014
I met him on a hobby forum. We got to know each other via hours long video skype conversations, every single day, for months before he first visited. Because of the time zone differences it meant that when I was grabbing lunch he was wrapping up his work day so we'd talk for an hour whilst I was on break, then when I got home I'd take to him for a couple of hours whilst he was winding down for the evening. Then on weekends we'd talk all day from when I got up to when he went to bed. It was a LDR. Insanely hard to pull off but well worth it.
>>104010
I am very much the same. I'd much rather hang out with my husband because it requires absolutely no mental effort and not only doesn't generate stress but relieves it. Compare that to the stress of meeting people from work for the viper pit known as a work social or after work drinks where one slip of the tongue or dining table faux pas can cause social ruin and always causes days of anxiety, over analysing and misery afterwards.
>>103998
I know I got lucky. Don't sweat your virginity. It's much better to wait and share your first time with someone who loves you. Looking back on it, what mattered is that I felt safe and loved and I didn't have any doubt or fear. I believed that he'd never hurt me. I still believe it.
>>103995
Disappointing? I can see why you'd say that. Sometimes I wonder what could have been had I been a little more forward, tried a little harder with people, pushed myself out of my comfort zone and ignored the gnawing self-criticism but every experience I've had with what I'd consider conventional/transient friends has taught me that the type of friends I want are rare. Most people aren't willing to put that much effort, or time, or emotional investment into connecting with people they don't have sex with. Truly deep friendships like the ones I crave don't really happen often at all and if they did, they'd be forged over many years. I've never had that kind of friendship, but I've always wanted it. I feel greedy and guilty whPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

>>104147
Did you have any cultural differences or communication issues?

I once had an online friend too who I met on a hobby forum and we also skyped everyday. No time differences though because we lived in the same country, only a few hours apart. We liked each other but none of us took the first step and turned our online friendship into a LDR. I'm happy it worked out for you.

i understand what you mean op.. everyday i see more women trying to give themselves eds and romanticizing it. if you go on the health and beauty board there are multiple women trying to lose weight in unhealthy ways. if they understood the pain of an eating disorder i dont think they would be so eager to give themselves one. women should cultivate internal and outward strength and give their bodies the proper nutrients. we shouldn't hate ourselves so much that only fitting into the smallest size or having such and such bmi makes us feel tolerable. but regardless, i often feel overcome by my desire to be smaller physically. i dont want to be anymore, i should probably stop letting myself think it's impossible to stop feeling that way.
eating disorders are trendy now. the social contagion aspect of the disease makes this compound on itself. modern social media makes them spread faster than ever.

>>104018
Is your boyfriend a /pol/ user?

>he doesn't accept the monopoly of the state on the definition of words, because they allowed same-sex marriage and made marriage a "femdom bondage contract"
I'd be embarrassed to let anybody know this dude breathed the same air as me, even strangers on the internet.

>he doesn't accept the monopoly of the state on the definition of words, because they allowed same-sex marriage and made marriage a "femdom bondage contract". So he said he would only consider marrying me privately without getting officially married.

sounds like an excuse he pulled out of his ass to not marry u lol. pick better next time anon

>>104037
agreed

>he is very intelligent
>he doesn't accept the monopoly of the state on the definition of words, because they allowed same-sex marriage and made marriage a "femdom bondage contract"
Should we tell her?

>>104018
This 5-year difference is an argument for marriage. Without it, you might spend your last years in poverty or at least a lower quality of life: a burial plot to pay, growing health costs etc.

>>104050
Yay! Congrats!

I never want to get married ever but if I had to choose a wedding dress it'd be a pretty coloured one with flowers and lace on it or something

>>56127
>family names means colonialism and eugenics
two years late but that's the most retarded take i've ever read on here probably

i got married at the courthouse a few months ago because i'm so anxious about planning a wedding. my job before covid was wedding planning so i know how much of a shit show/expense it is. i still want to have one because the only time you see everyone you love is baptisms/marriages/funerals. but fuck! it's so expensive. and my husband has a different cultural background than me so i have to figure out how to incorporate two ceremonies/outfits/music/food aHHHHHHHH. and i am very bad at dancing i do not want this documented

>>104065
>>104130
Thank you!

My wedding was perfect besides the flowers. I had a flower crown that I bought off Etsy. The florist was supposed to make my bouquet match it. I sent her a photo of it and everything and she completely forgot or ignored my details.

My headpiece is peonies and pale pink and creamy white. She gave me a bouquet that was hot pink and BRIGHT purple. Hideous! I broke down crying seeing it upon first sight. And they were dahlias and roses…

She gave me a hot mess of a bouquet that didn’t match my dress or flower crown so I walked around bouquet-less — THats how much I hated it. I am thinking of redoing all my hair makeup dress bouquet etc again and getting good photos professionally done at some type of wedding photoshoot business when I visit Japan or korea or something. I heard they have good photo-ops there.

>>102914
I resigned myself I'll just grow old and fall in love with a pretty (same age) old lady, who's also another girl who preferred older women

>>102832
ew. hope youre not still talking to this moid nona that is nasty.

I had my first kiss a couple months ago and it was amazing. It was after the first date with my girlfriend. We were in her car, she leaned in and kissed me for ~2 minutes. My lips were completely numb after, my heart was beating so fast, and my hands got all tingly. I'm so happy to have had my first kiss with her. I love her so much.
She's so beautiful and I'm so lucky to have her be my first everything.

honestly, to me there isn’t much joy in being a lesbian. I feel like straight women just hate us and view us as predatory freaks, straight men either see us as a porn category or they dislike us because they think we’re “stealing women” from them as if women are just property for moid pleasure and I feel like other gay people also stereotype lesbians in a negative way. on top of that, it sucks being the only lesbian in your area. dating is so much harder and it seems like all of my friends are entering relationships really easily whereas for me my dating pool is so much smaller so it’s significantly harder for me to find any woman who likes women. there also seems to be a lot of straight girls who just use lesbians to fulfil their fantasies and lead lesbians on until they leave us for moids.

>>104190
That actually sounds lovely in a way. I hope we get to grow old in good health and fall in love when the time comes.

>>101171
Brothers are the worst, it's also a fucking hell for mothers. I could ignore all the men I want, be an extreme separatist and still be awfully aware how my mom is miserably choosing their happiness by slaving herself. You hear all their misogynist words, you /know/ how they treat other females and the only thing I could do is just kill them I wish for something everyday

It is really sad that all the pretty girls i know feel like shit but fucking 2/10 guys feels like a model and likes to create low self steem on beautiful woman

>>101171
I have a brother like this as well. I really wish he'd die alone with no children just like the women he mocks. He's already doing a pretty good job at it too

I mean, if the women are into it, that's on them

I want to eat my boyfriend's ass and finger it. I fantasize about it but I'll never tell him. It's just too degrading even though it turns me on thinking about it.

I hate seeing a fat woman because I always think she would look better skinnier. Being fat isn’t attractive on anyone. Being skinny will always look better than being “thick.”

>>72365
I think it's one of those situations where you should either decide to bite the bullet or forget about relationships in general if sex is just borderline traumatizing for you.
Personally I don't believe for a second that moids can be asexual so trying to find one is like looking for a hay in a needle stack

>>103683
Is the financial support enough to have an actual comfortable life on your own? As far as I'm concerned he owes you all the years of having his cake and eat it too while you had a broken family for his convienience. And you should make him pay. You shouldn't be worried about the peace of mind or social stability of a rich adulterer, when he clearly has lived comfortably having you as this side thing on his life. Squeeze that shit. Don't live at the mercy of his kindness when he's been avoiding his responsibilities for years. Now, I don't mean storm his house with a lawsuit or nothing. But start making it clear to him that he's caused you a lot of grief and he should make things right by supporting you.

But if money is not a problem to you and all you want is a relationship. I'm sad to tell you you're never gonna have it. He's clearly not someone concerned with doing what's right since he's been doing this for years. At most you're gonna get some awkward visits and phone calls. Even if he did decide to introduce you to his family you're just gonna be this weird thing that sticks out at every gathering. There's no winning. I'm talking from experience here.

>>63992
Cried today because I have a friend who's old enough to be my father who's really sweet and caring and I wish he was my dad
Pathetic and childish but whatever

i want him to be 2 years younger. very uncomfortable with older guys for some reason. i’m a khhv i don’t want an older perverted guy who has fucked a thousand women that are probably less socially awkward and autistic

>>101090
Anti-fujo sperg you need to go back

I'm in my mid-20s and I'm not particularly attracted to older (5-10+) guys physically - they're usually starting to get pretty doughy, some (a lot!) are losing their hair, and you figure you've got maybe a decade before they can't get it up anymore, but it almost feels more and more like you have to look to guys that much older to find anyone who actually has their shit together.

Like >>101012 said, moids in their early-to-mid twenties are generally way more fit and attractive, but they also all tend to be lazy, obnoxious, mean, inconsiderate, commitment-phobic assholes and half of them still live with mommy and daddy.

It feels like a choice between two crappy options.

>>101126
Thank you for your service, queen

>>101012
>they tend to be quite cruel, inconsiderate, obnoxious and averse to commitment
I can believe that. I also find men younger than me most attractive physically, but as soon as they actually open their mouths or I see them interacting with their peers, the attraction is instantly gone.
Not judging anyone here but I really don't understand how some people can date much younger people. Most of them are like kids to me even though I'd probably be considered childish for my age.

>>104232
thanks nona. its hard bc even if potential friends reply here i'll be so suspicious that they are moids. there is no safe place for us anymore

In a similar boat nona. Thus may be weird, but Reddi.

>>104231
Going full politics early on in any type of relationship won't get you anything. I'd even say it's a redflag for most people since normies would try to minimize controversy. That's why they blend into mainstream opinions even though it'd be not their real opinion they hold on certain topics. It looks like you're sabotaging yourself

>>104248
thats a bold assumption to make.
not that i need to explain myself but: i have really good political/educational boundaries. i dont impose them on others and i dont engage in any religious, political or social/political chat in any early relationship.
most of what i mentioned was observations. & any time i do go to say anything or painted as "sexist" as i mentioned, im talking ab experiences ive had from deeper friendships where i have given my opinion. most of the time i am passive, i dont speak up on my views, i keep my "mouth shut" as i mentioned.
my point of the post is that.. i found as relationships progress, it becomes a problem later on bc my value system / and beliefs on feminism are very central to me.

>>104242
damn nona i feel you. wish there was a way to reach you and connect.