/feels/ - Advice & Venting

besides suicide what are my options if I hate myself so much that I am unable to function. What will help. Meds have not helped.

maybe this post is stupid or redundant but I don't see this particular topic covered in much of the "pick me" discourse. I believe there is a subset of pick me girls who present in ways that don't immediately read as pick me, possibly even overtly touting feminist thought or social justice or being a "girl's girl" or the like that you can just subtly tell they're still looking for male validation, attention, possibly even go for taken men (might see this type of pick me in the "female best friend").

it's like sure they may not be tradwife Tate apologists or "im so one of the boys im le gamer gurl teehee" but there are subtle gestures or comments or you notice the content they like online or you see what they post and it just reeks of male gaze or male-centeredness. it's hard when you know they're aware enough of the pickme concept to not be overtly bitchy or competitive, but you just get this gut feeling they'd throw you under the bus anyway or try to steal your man to live out her "she wears high heels I wear sneakers" fantasy. it's the modern "cool girl" who doesn't know it's a death trap yet. the manic pixie who still thinks her magic is for attracting men. the indie/alt chick who only hangs around guys but never admits the real reason why. the artsy coworker who tries really hard to get your bfs attention outside of work. the "mom friend" who tells everyone about it, especially men she's just met. etc., etc.

Everyone has. The right. To privacy.

When you go to an educational institution, it IS expected that your faculty and school administration is being HONEST about how they are interacting with your online data, and who YOU are.

When Apple says they share their user data for "relevant educational services," but FAILS to elaborate on what exactly those relevant educational services ARE, PRECISELY, YOU SAY. NO.

It is not, in fact, fucking normal, to go to school and feel like you are being spied on for experimental purposes, of which you have no clear idea about. It is NOT NORMAL to start receiving emails, from a school administration or company, that entail some broader """"MEANING"""" that you are NOT comfortable with.

IT IS NOT NORMAL TO LIVE IN FEAR.

It's not normal to feel emotionally manipulated into something you don't want to happen. It's not normal to feel like you are being lied to.

When media giants like Disney and Netflix start making shows and movies that seem, EXTREMELY, UNCOMFORTABLY relevant to your experience in real life, YOU SAY. NO. When companies like Amazon and Apple start coincidentally using the phrase, "Stay Connected," in a period in which everyone around you seems paranoid of their online and REAL LIFE privacy - YOU SAY. NO. When Youtube starts recommending shit that seems like THEY ARE LITERALLY WATCHING YOU, block these videos. WATCH SOMETHING ELSE.

YOU SAY. NO. You are not something to be controlled. That's not normal. This is in fact something that happens, and you are not crazy for feeling like this is not how you interact with actual, living humans. You are not wrong for feeling gaslit.

post yr ideal partner

I went to a hair salon and got my hair done for $350 and I tipped $70 but I was unhappy with it (it just wasn't what I asked for) so I went back for the free adjustment they offer and got my hair finished. it looks much better but still a bit uneven

How do I know how much to tip for the adjustment part?

hi nonas! i''ve been friends with a guy (lets call him david) for around 2/3 months and we've become pretty close in that time. david's good friends with the brother of one of my friends, which is how we both met. my friend (mentioned above) often jokes about how david's my boyfriend. i also have other friends who joke about the possibility of the two of us being in a relationship. i see him everyday at school, while also texting him throughout the day (mostly after school). we've also hung out outside of school a few times. when we first started talking, it was the beginning on christmas break and we texted for literally the entire day for the entire week. sometimes we call, which usually lasts for about an hour or more (the most recent time was last night). he's told me a lot about himself, and his life. according to him, i am one of the 2 friends that he has. i actually DMed my friend's brother and asked him if it was normal for David to be as talkative as he was, and he told me that david isn't usually very talkative, and that it's not normal for him to talk to me as much as we do. i have also told him a lot about myself, and he often makes jokes about me being a NEET/femcel.

i've been getting a bit of an inkling that he might like me because of how much we talk. there's no overt flirting. the only things i can think of as flirting are realistically just me reading too much into jokes about his "rizz". according to my friend's brother, he would never be the one to confess first. he's also really nice to me in general. once, a friend suggested that i ask him for money as a joke. i did, and when he texted me back he asked me how much i needed, followed up by him saying that the answer was probably no, and then asking what the money was for. also, whenever he says something that he thinks has offended me, david immediately apologizes.

okay so, the most important part that's kind of where i'm the most hung up about this whole thing… i wouldn't consider myself attractive. i'm not like,,, ugly i guess. but i'm short and fat and it makes me feel like a bit of a creep for thinking that he likes me. david isn't like… a chad i guess (not that that really matters to me tbh) but he's definitely not unattractive. he's a pretty normal looking guy, i guess, but i find him pretty cute. maybe i'm a bit insecure because of my weight but it's not like he minds? he's made a few fat jokes about me in the past and then immediately apologized Post too long. Click here to view the full text.

…in my sleep nonetheless. When he openly lets it rip in front of me in the day and night. The next day he let me know, acting like he’s bringing it up randomly as a joke. He followed it up by claiming that “I shouldn’t worry about it” but he would prefer if I didn’t (as if I have control over it when I’m passed out). I’m at a loss of words because I legitimately thought this man was in love with me and this feels very distinctly not like love. Am I overreacting?

>>51270 previous bread

I never brush my teeth for the full 2 minutes

It’s been coming up more that I just have…no one to really talk to. The internet and colleagues are great for directed conversations about specific topics, which is all you need most of the time. But if something good happens or I’m proud, or something bad happens, there’s…nobody. For normal people even if they don’t have friends or a therapist or a fucker they have family. Or if they don’t have family they have old, old friends. They have “lifetime people”. Even if they haven’t talked in years, if they really need to they have someone that knows them. There’s no replicating this if you missed the various dice rolls to get lifetime people. By late 20s/early 30s, it’s done. Everyone you build a relationship already has lifetime people, and those lifetime people will always be more real to them than you. You are just an episodic person for them, relatively speaking. There are little support forums where someone will essentially roleplay as one of your lifetime people, but that’s like eating wax fruit. There’s no fixing it. There’s nothing and no one. Forever.

i'm such a sore loser i always act like a baby when i lose. yesterday i played a card game with my bf and 2 friends i lost every round. yes it was my first time playing it but i wanted to fucking cry.