/x/ - /x/

>>10463
Misa Misa right?

i need to stop being schizo i need to stop being schizo i need to stop being schizo i know literally everything about her it fucking scares me i wish she would leave my head i hope i’m just being delusional i HOPE

I’ve read so much about the paranormal and conspiracies about the afterlife that I’ve seen some horrifying theories for what happens when we die (like that it’s possible to be trapped as a ghost for eternity and never reach heaven/reincarnation). I think a lot about the concept of eternity and how huge numbers can get or all the things that could happen throughout infinite time. I don’t know if any of it’s true but after thinking so much about it you begin to wonder how no one else has lost their minds thinking of the possibilities

>>11167
Absolutely same, it's got me genuinely too afriad to kms despite being insanely depressed lol

>>11168
Anon you replied to and yeah it’s horrifying. The book “Embraced By The Light” by Betty Eadie has put me on a meltdown because she says Mormonism is the closest to the true religion and that scares the fuck out of me. A bunch of celebrities like Oprah Winfrey and Kim Kardashian have boosted her as well, I hope it was made up

Have you had any success? I've tried to lucid dream for years now–although I've never kept a steady routine which seems necessary for it. I've had a couple of dreams–at random, although they happen after I've been sleep deprived–where I was aware of being in a dream but couldn't "be in control" or it which felt very frustrating.

>>11147
I mostly have anime and cartoon characters go on dates with each other while lucid dreaming

>>11148
that's so interesting. how long have you doing this for? any tips?

>>11152
>any tips?
Try writing a fanfic and act it out in your dreams

for me what worked was writing down dreams honestly, and just generally thinking abt it

>>11070
>he tried to shock/exposure therapy by putting it in my bed which was a surpressed memory from 5-20
sorry nona but this sounds funny as fuck

>>10203
Yeah I’m with you, that great unknown of whatever is after we die is enough to scare me away from ever killing myself at least. When I see big numbers it also causes me to spiral into that existential fear and any idea of the afterlife or lack thereof is scary to me and makes me want to meltdown honestly

spiders

had one crawl into my hair as an 11 year old. it crawled off my head and onto my bedroom floor and i just cried and cried and cried. now i dont even play minecraft on anything but peaceful. sometimes i get over it, but then i get “emotionally taxed” and it comes back full swing.

fucking hate that shit.

Walking on sandy beaches barefoot.

Ever since I was little I had this fear that there are knives or needles hidden under the sand's surface… I just can't get over that thought. I hate sand anyway, touching it makes me cry.

Big things. Even just pictures of big things, especially when they are next to something smaller like a picture of a person.

A close friend of mine had a huge breakup that ended with a sex video of her being released in college. I supported her through it but secretly I kept the video for months to masturbate to. I finally erased it all in a moment of clarity but I regret doing that so much

I used to swear a lot when I was young

Damn you are fucked up I have never done anything bad

>>4763
I physically abused my sister growing up

used to lie excessively and spread rumors as teenager

>>11039
Your reading: Futility, Love, The High Priestess, Knight of Wands, Wealth, Ruin.

Futility is pretty self explanatory. The card depicts a large sword identified with the sun, beset by three swords on both sides. The swords are identified with the planets, and both sets of three are equal to the center is every measure. You need a miracle to overcome the odds. Love is love in its simplest and purest form. Not just love between two people, but the divine masculine and feminine in perfect harmony. The High Priestess is a guardian of sorts, or a keeper on knowledge. She is one of the most feminine cards of the majors, and this leads to her naturally intuitive nature. You could say she represents nuit, or an intuitive experiential knowledge that is the object of all occult practice. She sits on the threshold of the abyss. The Knight of Wands is the fiery aspect of fire. He IS action. Both the impulse and the process, very masculine as well. Wealth is the most auspicious card, and considered the last card of the tarot. It represents an abundant wealth of something. It could either represent the full completion of the work (whatever it may be you have working towards) and all that results from it, or it could just be a wealth of something in general. Such wealth is great, and must be spent wisely or else it will cease to be. Ruin is not as bad as it seems. It represents pure reason with no emotions. Eventually, the mind unchained will consume itself, but in this not all is lost. The body remains, and the two can still be reconnected.

So I didn't even read 'with' when I read and asked you questions but thankfully the cards got it for me. So TL;DR, the pairing of futility and love are obvious, I won't spell it out for you. The next three cards are not so simple. I drew a clarifier for the High Priestess, and I'm afraid there is going to have to be another sexual analogy. So basically, the Knight of Wands is impregnating the High Priestess and the result is Wealth. The clarifier is virtue, which is the Three of Wands. The number three is the number of understanding. So I would say act on your intuitions, but be careful not to act too rashly. One of the pitfalls of the Knight is that he is incapable of deviating from his path, and it may lead him to ruin. The Knight of Wands could also be representative of a person, and since the Knight is surrounded by opposPost too long. Click here to view the full text.

>>11040
Your reading: King of Swords, The Empress, Page of Cups, Knight of Pentacles, Knight of Cups, The Devil.

The King of Swords is the most intellectual card of the court. He has little on his mind, and what is there he as conscious control over. He is wise, capable, but manipulative. He walks the razors edge between power for power's sake and for the sake of his kingdom. The Empress is the card of the divine mother. She is the feminine counterpart to the Emperor, she represents abundance and creation, and all of the aspects of feminine energy. The Page of Cups, like most of the other pages, is transfixed by his cup, and the fish within. The fish inside the cup is looking back into the eyes of the page. He is captured by his emotions, and he observed and studies them closely. A procession of knights follows him, one of earth and one of water. These knights represent a fulfillment of your desire, they bring the material and emotional aspects of your relationship. The Devil in this case represents your fear. I pulled a clarifier for this one (Five of Pentacles) and to me the devil is chaining you to the fear of rejection or perhaps a fear that what you seek lies elsewhere.

TL;DR, I think you should just go for it. The King of Swords and the Empress bid you to consider both your mind and your intuition. The Page of Cups is you, I think the fish in the cup is your nigel. The knights represent what you want and stand to gain from the relationship. The Devil holds a torch, the flame of love that you seek. You must take it from him if you want you dream to be realized. I have someone I'm obsessed with too nona, so I'm rooting for you.

Dunno if you're still taking requests: Should i step away from this friend group, or am i being hasty based on minor discomfort? Deck 1 please! And thank you.

will i ever move to my desired country? will my career plans work out there? deck 2 plz

2 readings for 2 separate questions (if you are still doing readings):

1 (deck 1): Will I be happy in my career path? Or should I fall back on the other one?

2. (Deck 2) Will my husband cheat/die/have a mental breakdown in the future and ruin our marriage?

>>11032
Yes I used AI to help write this. My grammar and writing skills aren't the best. I read my post and totally agree with it

>>11033
What a weakling, you should embrace your typing autism like who cares at the end of the day

>>8984
Haro evurinyan, hou aru you?
Fai, sankyu!

Ai wish ai waa a bardo.

If you can see a spirit, it's someone who hasn't fully moved on from their worldly attachments!
If you fully move on and rejoin the All, you lose your individuality for a bit .. to be one with Everything.
A spirit with a full body is held back by something.

>>10403
>lose your individuality
on my way

Spirits are formless. They don't "look" like anything because they are beyond the field of vision. If you are to imagine a spirit, imagine a thin layer of silk spread evenly over the entirety of space time. Spirits exist everywhere at all times. They're neither here nor there. Spirits are immaterial; they aren't tied to the physical realm. Your mother was right in that spirits appear like bodies of water; meaning, like liquids, they take the shape of the containers that hold them. When there is no containers, they overflow across the material realm. Spirits can appropriate the forms that they have seen in life, but those are like crass impersonations and don't hold weight. In your mind, imagine a great big ocean, but the ocean has no borders nor landmasses, it's just endless water. Now imagine all that has existed and all that will exist is held within the confines of that ocean. That is what the spirit is.

I always imagined them as just light orbs that can take on any shape or form they desire. Unless there is some kind of metaphysical gender for them but I doubt it

>>8999
Karlyn Borysenko in picrel vibes, new age/new thought is so weird. And kinda nihilistic when you really get into it.

>>9018
Mormons and new agers/thoughters believe you do because pre-birth/post-death you’re infinitely smarter and do it for a higher spiritual purpose. It walks a line between “ok that kinda makes sense” and spiritual bypassing, idk if I believe it cuz there’s so many NDEs that say its true and technically any finite suffering doesn’t mean anything for an eternal existence, I hope it’s not true though, it’s so nihilistic.

>>10528
You can just say you think they’re omnipresent, sounds a lot like Nirvana is what you’re describing imo

I had a really long dream about some actor/director/manager guy in this comfy worn-down city between some mountains, the sunlight was always nice. He was a funny guy, a scumbag, a jerk, an asshole, probably a rapist and murderer, etc. He spent the whole dream walking around town, meeting friends, having meetings, arranging gigs, going to parties, etc. He went up in the air in a blimp made by a genius kid who was doing props for a set. He offered to make the kid rich, he was rly generous with people. Then I think he was going to go to a sex party or something.

At the end of the dream, before the party, NOT at the party, I was showed up. We talked. He made it clear that this dream was a view of his life, his real life somewhere else, and was not about me, there was nothing here about me. I appreciated that clarification, so as dream-controller, right before I phased out, I "snapped my fingers" and made sure he had a really great sex party and got a couple hot twink boyfriends and made some extra good business deals or whatever.

I feel like someone drew a sigil and it happened to connect to me, like I was a demon in some other reality for five minutes once. I've been watching too many silly spiritual videos on yt.

The city was really nice though, very real feel. It had that nostalgic feeling, like it was worse than before, but still somehow as good as when you were a kid. Always sunset, sunrise, the roads and buildings were old, but plants always grew in the cracks. Th mountains really hugged the town. Idk. Strangely pleasant dream for how evil some of it was.

>>10437
> I was showed up.
Godddddd I hate how I jump around when I type anything long.

I heard a voice saying "Hey, health obsessed girl." I paused and then replied "Who, me?" The voice responded "No, you're white trash girl." Then I woke up.

Super weird one from a few nights ago actually, this one had me wake up in a cold sweat

>Sitting in livingroom of my apartment, talking on my phone to I believe my sister
>"Can a loved one fall for a skinwalker's voice?" I ask her, to which she responds with, "They are almost exactly like you from far away but the closer you get to them, the more you can see that something is just not right."
>a few moments later
>I hear my own voice coming from my son's room
>It is me cooing or baby-talking my 4 year old son, the door is open but I cannot bring myself to look in,
>I can tell that something is not right
>I peek in, the skinwalker or mimic or whatever doesn't see or hear me.
>my son is asleep but it looks exactly like my mom except bald
>it is still talking to him like he is awake and playing it's very bizarre, he is just lying there.
for context, I could tell the thing in my dream was not a future me or my mom it was just some sort of malevolent entity that was horribly imitating me and looked like my mom
In real life my mother is a drug addict who horribly abused me, I thought maybe this dream was my fears of becoming like her manifested in a weird nightmare.

had a dream where me and a friend were gonna go to an event in our local big city where they were having an Ensemble Stars event at a local café. I thought it was cool… but when we stepped into the café, we didn't see a single character from enstars at the event. Instead, it was ran by a lot of realistic furries that kinda looked like picrel. I was thinking in my head "maybe they're enstars furries!" in the dream, while my friend was so disappointed at what we ended up finding. Idk shit about shit about enstars, that's more of my friend's thing, but I just thought it was really funny.

I’m a flat earther but I think space would be cool if it were real. It really has the best urban legends. Like Voyager 1 being possessed and spamming gibberish. Black knight satellite conspiracy, lost cosmonauts, dark side of the moon, etc.

Neurowarfare absolutely exists and it’s likely that the government can already read minds. Just look at what’s commercially available right now, with many people saying they get ads for things they’ve only thought about, it’s not imagined or coincidental. Another logical conclusion (though not necessarily true) is that a great way to make the public think the government can’t successfully fuck with people's minds is to make sure that all the ridiculous and embarrassing failures get leaked and publicized widely and make it a bit of an embarrassing laughing stock, while making sure no-one hears of the successes. Just think about how much was redacted from the MKULTRA stuff.

>>10922
people bring up MKUltra as if it's not 36 years away from being 100 years old LOLE like get with the times old man… thjey're already readinog your mind and fucking with youyr brain to the point you beciome part of the hive bnefre you can even resist, All WIRELESSLY

I wholeheartedly believe that African swine fever virus was manufactured in labs for pork industry, so pork producers could easily get rid of each other.
ASF kills pigs very quickly, is highly contagious, there's no vaccines against it, but humans are not affected by this shit at all, which is really weird, because a lot of zoonotic diseases can spread to humans easily. Also there are no close relatives of ASF virus, it doesn't belong to any known family of viruses.
As I said, there's no vaccines, serums and drugs against it, so the only decision is to kill pigs as quickly as possible, burn the pig farm down and quarantine workers for few months. I worked on pig farm belonging to one huge company (in my country) and it's known fact, that they get rid of smaller farms by bringing ASF virus on them, so smaller farms have no choice but to kill all pigs.
Also, because of risk of infecting ASF, pig farms have complex system of biosecurity that allows a great control over workers, even outside of the farm. From my example, we were prohibited to eat pork from other companies, because long time ago they contracted ASF and therefore their production could be dangerous. Because of biosecurity we had to work in space, isolated from big world, we couldn't bring any means of communication with us (phones, computers, etc.), we had no idea what happened outside, we couldn't go away from our work places, even during emergency, we were completely stuck and isolated. We couldn't bring even our clothes, we had to bath together and wear shitty factory clothes. If something happened to us, no one would know.
And of course, ASF biosecurity protocols don't allow any trespassers, so it's very hard to get on pig farm unless you're its worker. I think, it was done, to prevent any sort of vegans and animal right activists from visiting farms, because if wide masses saw what happens on pig farms daily, they would stop consuming pork in a minute. But they don't see it and wicked cycle repeats itself.

>>10977
i hate humanity & animal agriculture so much it's fucking unreal

>>10975
You understand the MK Ultra was only brought up because of the redactions that were in the release, right? Maybe next time you post you could add a little bit more content instead of just self-aggrandizement.

>>10977
All the pig farms have been on in the US have been pretty good on caretaking, but they are extremely biosecure. I never saw any mistreatments of the pigs or anything. But I have the same feelings about the avian flu. The only difference is that they use avian flu to go after backyard chicken keepers and I don't know if ASF is used to punish small swine production. Maybe because it's less common?

There has never a case of chickens catching avian flu from wild birds, but many backyard flocks were euthanized because of the belief that they had avian flu. There's only recently been a case of a human catching Avian flu, and he was like 65 years old with comorbidities. I really think it's just to make sure people don't produce their own food from healthier flocks and happier chickens.