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/feels/ - Advice & Venting

Talk about relationships of all kinds, ask for advice, or just vent
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Anonymous Admin 49939[Reply]

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Long Distance Relationships Anonymous 44204[Reply]

Thread to discuss Long Distance Relationships. The struggles, the pros… meeting the person for the first time… meeting them for the 50th time… vent both sad and happy things. LDRs can be quite a challenge but it's the right thing for some people.
424 posts and 59 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 118920

>>118889
Right time right place. You also gotta do background checks and search for their discord handle in the archives before adding. If you see him posting in sexting threads and shit like that, don’t add him

Anonymous 119168

my gf and i have been long distance for a bit over 3 years now. im getting frustrated because every time i ask what our long term goals will be i get a vague non answer ("well when i graduate…" etc)

thankfully both of us have the income to afford multiple trips a year to see eachother but it's definitely affecting my life since i feel like all the time in between visits is just like… the void. like im standing around in an elevator waiting to get to the next floor. i almost feel like i'm wasting my life on this but that's hard to admit.

i want to make it work and i feel like we can but man this is so taxing. at least its gone better than my last LDR where the first time we met up she immediately dumped me and we had to spend the rest of the trip awkwardly being friends only lmao.

Anonymous 121925

I see my post about him from a long time ago was deleted. Much to think about.

Anonymous 127271

I know this thread is pretty dead but has anyone gone through the CR1 process without a lawyer? I'm worried my fiance is about to piss away thousands on something we can file for ourselves.

Anonymous 127299

>>127271
post on reddit maybe?


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why does society think women owe each other compliments? Anonymous 126800[Reply]

i hate the expectation that women are supposed to constantly compliment other women. especially on their looks. i’m a straight woman… i don’t view women through physical attraction at all. so complimenting their body or features feels unnatural to me. but if a woman doesn’t do it, people immediately assume she’s envious, insecure and sometimes even anti woman. men never face this. straight men aren’t expected to compliment other men, and when they don’t, no one questions their character or motives. women, meanwhile, are pressured to provide nonstop emotional validation. not complimenting a woman’s appearance doesn’t mean i dislike them. it just means i don’t feel obligated to perform a role society unfairly forces onto women. i don’t find women physically attractive. sorry not sorry.

Anonymous 126828

isn’t it just one of the first signs of being socially well-adjusted to at least attempt a compliment when seeing someone even if you don’t mean it? men aren’t expected to do it because they’re viewed as blunt and blind to social cues (and they generally are). women can read the room and can actually pick up on when someone needs validation or comforting. don’t fight it nano, the discomfort in being forced to compliment is just a reminder that you can emotionally understand someone.

Anonymous 127298

>>126800
How is this an expectation? And it doesn't have to be from physical attraction. If I notice someone is wearing something nice that stands out to me, and I know them well enough, I'll say nice top ! where did you get it from? It's not that deep lol

But it's definitely not a good idea to compliment if that feels unnatural to you or whatever. But have people assumed you to be envious/insecure because of that?


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Ugly Vent Thread Anonymous 124874[Reply]

A thread for women to vent and share their experiences with being ugly and how they cope in this look obsessed society.
81 posts and 11 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126618

I’ve lost weight but I still feel so fucking disgusting.
I know I should be proud of myself, but I can’t bring myself to be because in my mind I’ve made virtually no progress.
I started at 225 lbs and I now weigh 165. I’m not done losing yet, but I’m starting to feel really fucking discouraged.
I still look so fucking awful, if not just a little less wide than I used to be. I still have rolls and I can already feel the fact that I’ll have loose skin on my thighs and arms and stomach. The worst part is my legs, because I carry all my weight in my thighs so they’re still fucking gigantic.
Like even though I’ve lost weight and I’ll eventually get to my goal number, I won’t ever fucking feel pretty because I let myself get that big in the first place. It’s not even going to mean anything.
I struggled with binge eating all through out high school. I couldn’t take the feeling anymore so I decided I would finally try to stop binging and lose the weight, and I’ve been doing pretty consistently well as far as the scale goes, but I just feel like i barely have any visible progress to show for it.
I know I’m still overweight but even as I get closer to my goal I’m worried I’ll still look awful.
I feel so sick to my stomach because even after all I’ve put myself through I still can’t be beautiful and it’s all I’ve ever wanted but I guess it just isn’t attainable for someone like me. I hate living in my body, I hate looking the way I do.

Anonymous 126630

>>126618
>>126618
hi, just know that the closer you are to your goal weight the better you'll look. youve made so much amazing progress already, and ive been in your place before. i also struggled to lose weight on my thighs but what helped the most is incline walking and power pilates. it doesn't matter how much you've used to weigh; what matters now is that you're changing and you're becoming healthier! keep going!

Anonymous 126658

>>126630
thank you for the advice and kind words i really appreciate it nona :)

Anonymous 126754

Even with makeup on I still feel like shit. Because yeah, I can put it on and be objectively prettier, but I just keep thinking about how the makeup industry targets women’s insecurities to get them to spend money and how I’ve fallen into that trap. I wish I could say I do my makeup for myself, as an artistic expression, but I 100% do it for others.

Anonymous 127297

I feel so ugly. My forehead is my biggest insecurity. I want to cut bangs, but i don't want people to know I'm actually insecure yk. And bangs don't even really fit with my current hair. When I see myself in pictures it actually makes me suicidal. It's always my forehead tbh. I'm too afraid to look at myself. I see people who are unattractive be so confident, post pictures, and I don't get how they do it. I don't mean to say they should feel insecure, I just don't know why I am cursed with feeling this way about myself. I wish I had that bliss of ignorance.

Ideally I want to cut my hair (bangs) and dye it (pink) but I'm afraid to do it in my current setting at school. I don't want to deal with judgements. I already feel subhuman at my school. I'm not alternative but I'm not as basic and conforming as the other girls. I feel ugly for not being conforming. And like a freak because I'm not as social. I never talk in class and I want to talk to my classmates but it usually doesn't go that well. I fear more judgement, if I cut my hair, even if it's how I truly want to be. I think as soon as I've made my final exam I'm going to do it. I think I'd feel better about myself.

And there's a guy that likes me from school but I feel so ashamed, like I've tricked him because I'm so ugly. I feel guilty because we built a connection online and now he's attached to me bc of that. We were both too shy to talk to each other irl. Despite having classes together. I don't want him to see me. I don't want anyone to see me.

As for my body… sigh. I have big boobs which should be nice. Except that they make me look so fucking fat. when I wear sweaters and stuff, it just looks horrible. i look so big. Because of the way the sweater falls, it looks like I have a giant stomach. I'm too insecure to wear tight fitted tops, maybe also because I don't want to attract that kind of attention from moids,, so idk what to wear. I'm seriously considering buying a binder to make my chest look more proportional when wearing sweaters. I just hate how it looks,. I avoid wearing color because you can see my boobs. So i just end up wearing navy and black, and look super depressing. I'm also always hunched over because it feels like they stick out so much. They just bring me down and I just look like a sad depressed wreck


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Lesbians are the most oppressed, idc Anonymous 126590[Reply]

>Discord will ban you if you don't like trannies
>Reddit will ban you of you don't like trannies
>/r9k/ supports prison gay men and attention seeking fakeecel ethots but will shit on you and exclude you for being a lesbian
>/lgbt/ will shit on you for not being a Goldstar
>radfems will shit on you for not finding fat hairy ugly bitches attractive or for liking anything that isn't holding hands and kissing bc anything else is "male gaze-y"
>right wing twitter shits on you for being homosexual
>left wing twitter shits on you for being transphobic, aka for being an actual homosexual
>Bluesky…. Why are you on Bluesky?
>I don't know any secret tags on Tumblr for lesbians, but the fact if there were any it would be annoying to have to walk on eggshells else-wise the tag gets raided for not liking trannies
>third world countries… You don't even have any rights.
>Most of the western world will arrest you if you publicly say you don't like trannies
>Even in America, trannies are allowed in female only spaces even if its prison or a domestic abuse shelter
>Growing up having to learn in school that you were treated as inferior in every way all throughout history up until very recently

Not to mention having to deal with the rhetoric against lesbians being so mind-numbingly dumb and illogical.
Post too long. Click here to view the full text.
11 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126675

Tolerance to sexual deviancy has no place in a healthy society.

Anonymous 126681

>>126590
I used to get frozen pizza only on birthdays..

Anonymous 126682

>>126675
the way i started nodding before i realized what you weirdos were on about. how is a woman loving another woman DEVIANCY? go ask the men in your life hard questions and leave wlw alone? go bother a fucking coquette age player? literally there are entire reddit communities of pedos and people who molested children to harass. you could get this energy out any other way and instead you’re being homophobic because a girl will hold another girls hand. you sound crazy. literally there are men in your life who have harmed women and have crazy internet footprints. where is this energy for them?

Anonymous 126683

>>126681
i will make you a frozen pizza daily my princess. i would make you REAL pizza.

Anonymous 127295

>>126590
This is so chronically online. Half of the things you mentioned don't even exist in the real world. You are spending so much time and energy being negative,, no wonder women don't like you lol. And then you use this fictive rejection to blame and generalize other groups. No way you just made me defend moids among others…

The way you're expressing yourself sounds like someone who's hurting, but not someone who's beyond hope. I can recognize how badly you want a relationship, a connection with another woman. I struggle with the same thing, with not being able to find women who are into other women. Perhaps also because I am femme4femme. But I don't think it's as impossible as you make it out to be.. because if you don't even try to reach out to women then what do you expect?

I hope your concert goes well, but also don't lose hope if something doesn't work out. You deserve a good relationship and I wish you the best in pursuing one.


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Just one more year. What should I do? Anonymous 126476[Reply]

I'm stuck in a weird position.
When I newly turned 17, I met with a 30 year old guy from 4chan because I was lonely and wanted a friend. We had some common interests in games. We hung out at the arcade and in the same year, I went to his house to play co-op. However, the friendship was short lived as he asked me to be his girlfriend right after. I was young and stupid, I saw no issue with him. He was unfit and never had a girlfriend before, I never had a boyfriend before. So I thought I should give him a chance.
It's been 1 and a 1/2 years now. Due to feeling unsafe at home, as soon as I turned 18, I moved out to this dude's house. He said he'd support me. So I moved and enrolled to a highschool near his house.
Over time, living with him, I began to pick up on things that do not sit right with me.
Firstly, he has figurines of some anime girls that troubled me from the very first time I came over, but I thought I should just overlook it. Figurines of miku, vtubers and Fate characters. He has plushes of vtubers, his profile picture is a vtuber. He admits that he likes vtubers but doesn't watch them anymore. Yet when I criticise them for milking money from men he opposed me.
Things that disgust me include him loving the anime 'yuru yuri' a show common among lolicons, loving the soundtrack of 'yuru yuri', he downloaded all of them and calling the government 'woke' because the age for marriage is 18. Other than this, I told him I do not use twitter, but everyday, I check what he has posted and who he recently follows. When I checked his following for the first time, I burst into tears. It was anime porn artist after anime porn artists. Most of his following was that. Yet checking his recently followed, he still actively interacts with these anime porn artists. When he shows me something on twitter, he's very wary and cautious of ever scrolling too much, and when he accidently does - it's all vtubers and ecchi drawings of anime girls. Last night, I checked his following again, and I cried again discovering he followed 20 more disgusting anime artists.
The worst thing is, these anime porn artists also draw porn of underage characters… in other words loli. It's a trend I've noticed across the artists he indulges in.
I feel so stupid, I was too young and dumb to notice this before I lived with him. And now I'm stuck with this borderline pedophile. I should've picked it up when I told him my real age and he said "15 is legal anPost too long. Click here to view the full text.
16 posts and 4 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126563

leave him, listen to your intuition. he’s a pedo gooner. take photos and screenshots of all of his degeneracy and send it to his family. does him mom know about this or does she just enable it? also, see if there are any women’s shelters near you. can you get him to give you money, like lie and say it’s for like cosplay lingerie or something?

Anonymous 126586

>>126560
>>126560
i was going to yell at you but i was too tired. i’m not her but thank you for apologizing to her.

Anonymous 126600

>>126586
Yeah, I tried to delete the post but I can't since 30 minutes have passed.
Thank you for being someone who yells at people when they say stupid things.
>>126476
Once again, I'm really sorry, don't even read that shitty post at >>126555
I get into a both-sides mentality too easily when abuse is usually from one aggressor to someone whose aggression is usually just self-defense.
You clearly have many reasons to defend yourself, especially after what you've experienced and the overall person that moid appears to be.

Anonymous 126603

>>126486
you have the same mentality of a moid. stop slutshaming depressed women.
>>126600
thanks for owning up to your mistake instead of just running away from responsibility like a lot of people do.
>>126525
im not qualified to give any advice, but i just wanted to say i hope things get better for you. i know how it feels, thinking that the only love you'll get is from the lowest of the low. that pedofag doesn't deserve you.

Anonymous 127294

>When I newly turned 17, I met with a 30 year old guy from 4chan
>stuck with this borderline pedophile

Nothing about him is "borderline". he IS a pedophile. I'm sorry to tell you this but you were groomed. and now you are doing charity work staying with this loser 4chan 250 pounds discord mod. wtf? what does this guy actually have to offer you? Reading your posts, you are obviously disgusted by him and can recognize that his behavior is a red flag.

nona you only think you love him because you don't know any better. As you said, this is your first boyfriend, and you were abused as a child. But this does not mean it always has to be like this. You can leave him, escape. please

>>126557
Is this a possibility? this situation is definitely not normal and you need to get out. I'm sure if you reached out to someone, they would try to help you.


old-priest-in-fron…

confessions thread 2 Anonymous 63992[Reply]

>>51270 previous bread

I never brush my teeth for the full 2 minutes
434 posts and 56 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126390

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>>126389
reading comprehension deity… I kneel

Anonymous 126405

>>126390
Even if it's about the same guy - kinkshaming is out, fetishes are weird. Droping somebody bc of that (and then proceed to fall into depression) is asinine.

Cutting him out and be cool about it is one thing, cutting him out and fall into depression another.

The tactical question arises: what was the point of this whole exercise? Apparently to make you miserable and show him that his likings are not okay. Both people sad, nobody won.

Anonymous 126406

>>126405
you sound like you're really into suits

Anonymous 126409

>>126408
Archons pushing new, meaningless words for goyim to use as weapons in culture war against each other.

Anonymous 127293

i shower 2x a week … it's only when my hair gets greasy… I do wash my armpits every day so i dont smell… but idk how people shower every day

I also dont brush my teeth every day. and if i do only in the morning

And I've given up on romantic relationships, buut the only guy i could see myself with is… my friends ex… which feels so shitty and i know i couldn't do that. but we genuinely share the same views and feelings on everything. It feels like we can only understand each other which is so rare. I don't have that in any other friendship.. and idk how long i can ignore these feelings


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unsent letters Anonymous 127088[Reply]

17 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 127280

If you're so happy with him, why are you squealing like an ugly demon pig?

Anonymous 127285

i’m so at peace knowing you’re sorry for what you’ve done.

Anonymous 127290

oh jesse has been very very very bad

Anonymous 127291

toothless lard ass making jokes no one acknowledge and shrieking and groaning is so fucking unintentionally funny. does she think her voice sounds sexy? calling her friends big boy??? does she make those grunts and screeches in bed that’s fucking insane? she knows she’s not fucking cute right? i assumed she did when she self identified as an ogre?? why does she think she’s pulling this off omfg this is the most humiliating shit i’ve ever heard no wonder you don’t play with her?? but god you have autism don’t you. james too huh. the way you bark orders and get so annoyed so easily and bitter when no one likes the maps you choose. y’all have autism for real and the stuttering is crazy.

Anonymous 127292

>>127088
i clipped the part where you had a character run across a five foot room with a trap disengaged and scream grunted as if you were running. autism.


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my partner is addicted to his computer Anonymous 127144[Reply]

i can’t believe he couldn’t even spend time with me on thanksgiving. he wakes up. instantly in a game. i reluctantly open my computer and check on his ex, a bad habit of mine. can’t bring myself to play a game. i look over my shoulder and catch him creeping on his ex before going back to his game. we leave and spend some time at our relatives for thanksgiving together. he’s on his phone the entire time. we just got engaged and he is more interested in his phone than me. he couldn’t even get me a ring the right size. now we are back home and he RAN to his computer. and he’s just focused on what his ex is doing. what should i do?
59 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 127281

>>127226
You can be lethally underweight and a gross moid will still call you fat. It's shorthand for "u ugly and I never liked you anyway waaah just let me use ur fuckholes u mean bitch", it doesn't really mean anything other than that he can do everyone a service by dropping dead. If you leave your gross bf he'll call you fat too. I'd slap him for you and his poor exes who had the misfortune of knowing him if I could.

Anonymous 127283

>>127278
>i think my relationship is over.
Good, I'm happy for you, noona!
The sooner you know, the easier it is to leave.
Shitty relationships are almost always harder to leave than healthy ones though, you must've been in a pretty bad place to get roped into that…

Anonymous 127284

>>127281
>>127283
she’s apparently talked down to him and said he’s like balding but his hair line is receding. he does watch a lot of porn. he did date a much younger girl. he did fail at a lot of things. i don’t know if she did. i’ve just seen one profile pic of her and i think she’s gorgeous and definitely the prettiest of his exes. she didnt look fat at all she was just very baby faced. it’s 1 in the morning where i am and he just asked if i minded and went back into mount and blade. it’s over between us so i just lied. he’s still going at it. no work tomorrow so he’ll sleep in all day long then play more. i’ve started planning my escape.

Anonymous 127288

>>127284
>said he’s like balding but his hair line is receding
yeah, first sign of male pattern baldness
>i’ve started planning my escape.
Yess, I'm rooting for you, noona!!

Anonymous 127289

>>127288
he doesn’t know how to ask for a flattering hair cut or to style his hair now that there’s chunks missing at the front. and he just keeps cutting it short letting it grow out and it just looks so terrible i can’t stand it. he doesn’t trim his facial hair it’s like he thinks he either has to grow it all out full length or shave it. he’ll only create for himself an awful chin strap and never groom the length of the hairs. he looks much older than he is, even a little older than me. his teeth are yellow. i keep thinking of all the gross things he does. he doesn’t eat vegetables. he brags about his butt being big all the time. he just farted and keeps moving awkwardly. i don’t know why i stayed for so long. he sucks at the games he plays too.


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dating ppl you’re not physically attracted to Anonymous 126942[Reply]

dating ppl you don’t find attractive is actually one of the most selfish and cruelest things some ppl do to each other. i can’t stand how some ppl actually think this is a virtuous act and think this makes the love you have for someone more valid. stop doing this. you’re way better off alone than doing this to another person.
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

Anonymous 126959

icl my boyfriend is hella ugly

Anonymous 126973

>>126959
mine too lol but im so into it he's just so unique i need him. only problem is i cant stop thirsting over randoms bc theyre attractive. its too bad attractive men dont have personalities

Anonymous 127261

>>126942
eh I dated a guy who wasn't conventionally attractive. He was so clingy and always wanted to be touching and kissing me or whatever, but sometimes he repulsed me. He didn't have optimal hygiene either what didn't help .

But I didn't date him as some sacrifice or whatever, I actually developed feelings for him , and over time he did start to become attractive to me. Idk how I was so blind. I started to like his smile and his eyes and freckles. Thinking back to moments I saw him, I do still look back and remember finding him attractive. But when I actually see pictures of him I'm embarrassed he can even say he was with me.

Idk if looks really matter. I'm currently talking to a guy I don't find super attractive but he's nice and I guess I could be able to find him cute if he is charismatic irl as well. But I probably wouldn't be able to find interest in someone who is actually super objectively ugly. Maybe thats shallow idk

Anonymous 127286

>>126942
>some ppl actually think this is a virtuous act
Who the hell… Yeah no, it's just awful.
>dating ppl you're not physically attracted to
Yeah, that and not figuring out your sexuality beforehand.
I've never been physically attracted to anyone, but when I started dating, I thought that desire would develop over time and I'd come to like sex if I just tried it. My boyfriend was very handsome and I really liked his appearance in an aesthetic sense. I didn't really want to have sex with him though. I thought, maybe that's normal for women, I just need to try harder, I just need to read more on how to have sex, I just need to practise, I just need to fantasise about him specifically and figure out how to get aroused at the sight of him, etc..
I thought the problem was that I just didn't love him enough, got really insecure about it and then we broke up.
Took me way too long to figure out that I'm asexual.
I wish I could've just told him because I really did like him.
I wish I'd figured myself out sooner or just asked him to wait when he asked me out. Or at least confided in him regarding my insecurities around sex and attraction. But I was afraid of hurting him by telling him something like that so… Yeah, I felt awful. I didn't do it on purpose but I could've hurt him really deeply. I'm glad he moved on quickly at least and started fucking around before we even broke up properly. Not really cheating because it was an open relationship sorta deal.
That relationship ended almost two decades ago when there wasn't much information on asexuality in my language (there still isn't). Even at LGBTQ+ awareness things now, it's rarely brought up. At least knowing about the concept would've been helpful…

Anonymous 127287

i think a lot of women date men they aren’t attracted to because they’re conditioned to be polite and kind and never judge a book by its cover. i never see men shamed for calling women ugly. i think a lot of men will settle for whatever will let them have sex with it. gender sometimes doesn’t even matter. they’ll fuck a hole in a park bench.


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